Don’t Blame Me I’m A Martian-4

Chapter 4

Three days later and I’m back at the shore with my family and I haven’t really been out around town since my first day back.

That was fun. I was on one of the cottage bikes a no speed ancient thing when Ricky Conway and his asshats drive past me and he hit me square in the chest with a mello yellow flavored slurpie. It hurt, it was cold it got in my eyes and stung like a…well a lot. Mom had a talk with Dad and apparently I’ve got to clean up my language. Anyway the ass yells out “Nice Tits!”

I was laying in the gravel on my butt on the side of the street and all scratched up and the slurpie was outing my starter boobs with a wet t-shirt contest effect.

Knee bleeding crying because I’m not able to fight these new (Insert Swearing) hormones from getting me to a point of getting upset like I’ve never been I got back up on my bike and rode back to our cottages.

I haven’t left for two days. For the most part my family has been okay even the distant relatives and stuff. It’s a medical condition but the guys are sort of still the worst the first day back asking if they can see them. They asked actually so much I threw a fit and took my shirt off and walked around showing off my starter boobs to all of them until the women of the family ordered me to put a shirt on.

Or as Hillary said. “Dylan, stop flashing your boobs right now or you’ll be getting a pap test without you owning a vagina.” And with my other cousins there, older female cousins looking girl pissed sorry peeved I took the threat seriously.

The girls though, the tweens and younger are as bad or worse about it. One they think it’s their right to be able to see mine just because they have their own, two they are all kinds of smug about this happening to a boy. It’s (Insert Swearing) irritating and it’s hurtful too.

Then there’s the great and wonderful joys of social networking. I was already getting messages from home, fro kids I knew. I was getting hate e-mails from people I didn’t even know. I reported the abuse, closed off my accounts to my various sites I was a member to and curled up for the most part in my travel trailer and cried and kept to myself and fell into a deep funk.

I think people were worried about me and they kept checking on me and things. One thing had become pretty clear. Amy had to know and she hadn’t come around or called me yet. She would have, should have called me by now if she wasn’t freaked out.

In the end of my funk it was my brother Jax who got me going again. He walked right into my trailer without knocking and even it being locked never stopped him because it’s really old and the door can be jimmied open if you know what to do.

“Jax! Get the (Insert Swearing) out!”

“Hell no! Look Dylan you’ve got to face up to things, you’re different but you’re not all that different that you were before this stuff happened. C’mon get your court clothes we’re going down to the park.”

“No, I’m not going down there and be a target.”

“Dude, you’re already a target but you’re just not shooting back. Now c’mon get your stuff and get your stick and your skates and let’s go down and show them that you can still outshoot and out skate their asses and still mix it up.”

“Jax…”

“Dylan look you let them walk all over you and there’s those people out there that will. You not saying anything or doing anything in your own defence is just going to let them do this all the time, year after year and everything. Bullies shut up when they can’t back their shit up and the mob? They’ll find something new next week without the bullies to egg them on.”

“Jax.”

“Thanks.”

“No problem Dylan just do me two favors?”

“Uhm…depends?” I Never…Ever Say Yes To A Favor or to do something with out knowing What It Is First. It’s a good life rule to live by people, really good.

“Take a shower because you’ve got days of funk on you and wear a bra.”

“A Bra…”

“Yeah; one we’re going to be playing sports so you’re going to need one. And two it’ll drive those who got a problem with you being like this nuts.”

“And I want to piss them off?”

“Hell yeah, they’ll play like crap because of it and they’ll play dirty too and they’ll look even more the asses when we beat them and stuff.”

I grabbed my stuff and actually headed to the showers and washed myself clean of what was a couple days of funk and took my time in there and got really clean. I remembered the hard way how water from the shower can be rough of starter boobs and again found myself dealing with my sand paper towels.

The sports bra was really nothing special but it well looked weird and it flattened me right out but I could kind of feel the compression. But still there wasn’t any hiding the fact that it was still a bra. Boxer briefs made of stretch cotton that’ll still keep the right shape no matter how I start growing and I toss on my basketball trunks and throw on a nylon summer mesh styled NJ Devils Jersey and grab my roller blades and my hockey stick and some cash. Jax is waiting for me by the car and we drive down to the park stopping only for a cooler of ice, some drinks and some hot dogs and buns and stuff. Dad keeps a bag of charcoal and a hibachi in the truck most of the summer. Its funny how many roadside bumper BBQ’s we’ve had on long family vacations and trips.

Jax says feeding girls who come over to listen to the tunes you’ve got blasting is a great way to get numbers and as an ice breaker. Jax’d know he’s a tail magnet….Uhm, sorry.
He’s really good with women.

We drive around town first just cruising around and blasting tunes really loud out of the car. Okay a lot of people might think it’s not cool or it’s old music but we crank out stuff like Bon Jovi, Def Leopard, Bread, Styx, White Snake and all those old classic bands that just go with Jax’s old 79 Monte Carlo.

We hit the old park that used to be part of this old tennis court down near the beach and take the parking space closest to the pavement. We’ve got the tunes cranked and I’m in my rollerblades going up and down the asphalt with Jax when after about twenty minutes a bunch of the locals and long term cottage kids show up.

Ricky Conway and his idiots are amongst them. He yells as he’s putting on his skates. “Yo Jax, why don’t you and your faggy little sister take off out of here and let some real men have the spot.”

Jax lazily skates around us passing the orange street hockey ball back and forth. “Ricky, you we’re here first. We got the court so you either play us and win or take off.”

“I don’t play with fags, especially ones growin his own tits.”

I snap the ball into the net and retrieve it. “I’ve got a medical condition Dick, It’s genetic Dick. I’ve got a doctors file saying that too. But you’re an ass---- Dick, and I don’t think that they’ll ever find a cure for that.”

He gets up and comes at me. I hit him in the chest with a hard wrist shot. He staggers back. “You little asshole, I’m gonna kick your ass!”

I stare him down while skating around him. “I’ve got a hockey stick Dick and you’re not safely driving by in a car full of your buddies. You want a piece of me come and get it. But if you’re done being a Dick, Dick how about you put up or shut up and actually play the game. Unless you don’t think you’re tough enough to handle me and Jax.”

Just to egg him on, I adjust my bra strap. I didn’t need to but it’s a gesture most of the kids around just can’t miss.

“Alright, lets fucking do this faggit, street rules?”

“Fine by us. Can you handle some action D..Ick?” Jax asks.

“How much asshole?”

“Ten bucks a game?” Jax holds up a tenner. “We’ll let Jillian hold the cash.” He beams at her and she takes the money blushing. She’s so into Jax and getting chosen for something like this seems to be some kind of big deal with the girls. Ricky passes her a ten. “First till?” he asks…grunts.

“Seven, me and Dylan don’t have all day there’s other people here that want the court.”

Ricky gives him the finger and Brent Johnson is playing with him and he looks just as much an asshole as Ricky is. I don’t know him that well but he’s giving Jax a look that’d peel paint. I end up facing off against Ricky and Jillian tosses the ball out to the center of the pavement and it’s sort of a race to get to the ball first. Like I said sort of, I’m focused on the ball Ricky wants to knock me down I’m sure with a check and I reach out one handed with my stick and catch the ball in the curve of it and veer sideways running from Ricky enough to get both hands on the stick and pass it to Jax.

See Ricky could keep after me but he’s got money on the line so he might not try to thump me and I’ve got reach with knowing actually how to use my stick. See I used it to grab the ball first and keep that much ahead and away from Ricky and now he could close that six or seven feet and try to check me or he could try to go after the ball and Jax with Brent. Johnson.

He tries to hit me trusting his buddy to take care of my big brother. I make a turn as he comes at me and just before he hits me I skate hop three feet left of him and he tries to turn as I’m doing it. The thing is I’m a hockey player, dick’s not. Suddenly trying to turn has him skating backwards which has him on his ass in seconds I skate away and join up with Jax and we pass the ball back and forth until I shoot it into the old three foot square road sign we all use as the goal there. We skate a victory lap while they gather their dignity or bravado and come at us.

They skate at us passing the ball and I slide in and intercept it and break for the goal. Brent tries to stop me and I pass it to Jax who passes it back to me and a flick of my wrist and bam! Another goal.
It’s pretty much like that the rest of the game which only takes like twenty minutes and there’s cat calls from the kids who’ve been on my case but they slowly stop as we play. It’s a total shut out and Ricky looses it as Jax is collecting our cash from Jillian. He skates right over and starts to swing at me. “I’ll teach you not to fuck with me you cheating little bitch!”

I duck the first couple of swings. I yell at him. “Cheat? How the fuck did I cheat you red necked (Insert Swear here.)”

“I’m gonna kick your ass.” he says as his third swing lands in my face sending me sprawling. Jax goes to come over but I hold up my open hand and the Ricky tries to kick me. I grab his skate and push him off balance sending him to the ground I’m up before him and have enough time to yank off my shirt and get into a fighting stance. No I’m not a martial artist but I know some boxing, I’m a teen guy…sort of from Jersey. There’s always someone who’s a boxer in the family. Mine actually my dad and Jax. I’ve picked up a few things plus playing hockey can get a bit rough.

I mix it up with Ricky and he’s not a slouch either and we trade hits for a few minutes and yeah he’s older, bigger and stronger but I’m no slouch either, I’m strong for my size and I’m way more used to fighting and staying balanced on skates. It’s a pretty even fight and I get hit with a few really good and painful punches but I land some of my own and people started the fight chant and formed the ring around us and some of the girls were starting to get freaked out because I’m in a sports bra and I look too much like a girl I guess because there’s cries from the crowds to “Stop it!” and to “Leave her alone!”

The fight stops when Johnny Stevens steps in between us. It’s good because I’m not sure if I could’ve taken Ricky. Johnny’s a cottage kid like us but he comes down from Canada to spend summers with his dad’s folks. He’s built like a tank too about 6ft four and well over two hundred pounds of big, big farm boy. I know coaches who kill to have this guy play football. He shove us both to the ground like we’re toys.

“It’s done.” His blue eyes look intense and stormy.

Ricky frowns. “Stay out of this you Commie Pinko Canuck. This is between me and the fag.”

“Rick, Dylan’s almost three years younger than you. I don’t think it’s cool for you to beat on him.”

I just keep quiet but a couple of the girls help me to my feet looking me over and definitely my chest and bra but the rest of me too. It makes me self conscious and I grab my jersey and slip it over.

“That ain’t a him but an it.” He gets up and looks around and a few of his buddies stand beside him to back him up. Mostly (Insert Swear) like him that don’t like anyone different and don’t like Canada for the Iraq thing and the other BS drummed up over them being socialists and stuff. Yeah these are the “Freedom fries and Freedom toast” kind of guys.

But as much as New Jersey gets a rep for being rough and unpolished we’re NOT a red state. So even as he and his buddies get together there’s more of us who aren’t real fans of him and his bullshit. A couple of the local guys step out of the crowd to sort of back us up, some are Jax’s friends. Ricky looks around and frowns and points at me and Johnny.

“This ain’t over Commie, I’ll catch up with you and the freak sooner or later.”

I stare at him. “I’ll be ready, but we can finish it now Dick, no one’ll get involved.”

He stares at the crowd. “Naw, later freak.” he pushes through the gathered kids chuckling and a few out of that crowds goes with him. The freak comment hurts and I’m suddenly shaking like I’ve never been in a fight before as the adrenaline wears off and my hormones kick in and the tears start to run down my cheeks.

That does it for some of the girls and about five or six lead me over to the car and are all that girly touchy feelie and kind of freaking me out and Jax comes over and hugs me and passes me a bottle of Mountain Dew and some ice wrapped up in his t-shirt. I actually didn’t mind the hug?

“You okay Dylan?” he asks me.

“Yeah, just bruised a lot. He punches pretty good for a red neck. Must be all that wife beating practice.” I rub my chest a bit. “He punched me in my left boob.” The girls with us wince in sympathy.

“You know I had your back right?” He asks actually looking more worried than he usually does.

“Yeah but I’ve been in fights before Jax. I can take care of myself. I love that you’re getting all big bro over this but just because I’m growing into being part girl it doesn’t mean I can’t take care of myself, girls gotta do it all the time.” I’m getting looks from some of the girls with me and even a few others close by.

“You sound like mom.” he smiles. “I’m going to set up the Q.” he moves away and pops the trunk. I see Hill show up and she ends up going over to Johnny and kissing him. So that’s why he got involved.

We end up a whole bunch of us talking; mostly about my medical condition and even about being adopted and found here which for some strange reason changes me from cottager to being a local and we cook and share out the hot dogs and waters and pops and even dance close to the car listening to the tunes blasting out of it. Johnny introduces us to some of his tunes and Brian Adams…that song summer of 69 just seemed to fix with the day and everything that’s gone on. We play a few more games with the local guys and Johnny is almost the stereotype Canadian guy and good at the game but we find out teasing him about it that the town he comes from doesn’t do baseball or even football basketball or hockey that’s the only two big sports there in Boen’s Landing. You know another good song? This song called “Big league.” it’s a hockey song but reminds me a lot of Bruce Springstein’s stuff.

The girls get lot more about what’s going on with me and they get onto their phones a lot during the afternoon and text and face book and stuff and one girl Kaylee had recorded the bit where we’re sitting around eating and talking about what’s going on with me and stuff and it’s now on You Tube and Facebook and Twitter and stuff and we’re reading the responses by the bonfire after we kind of migrated to the beach and stuff once it got dark.

Kaylee’s pretty cool and we even danced a little and she’s smiled at me even a bit. I even lean on her and she on me in front of the fire and listen to the music and watch people just having fun. This is the way summer should be.

I watch my big brother dancing and showing off and being charming with the girls. I owe him a lot for today. I feel that life’s not going to suck after all I think. I lean over and kiss Kaylee as this song “Life in a Northern Town.” starts to play and we kiss a little deeper and her hand slides onto my chest and rubs at my sore starter breast.

…….oh…Oh….

o_O!