All the world’s a stage

I called down to the front desk after trying Tanner’s room where I received no answer. They tell me he has not left the hotel to their knowledge so I ask them to leave a message light on his phone then when he checks with them please have him call me. They agreed and I went back to playing with my photos, trying to see exactly how much detail can be found in them.

 © 2010 by Lilith Langtree & Rénae Dáºmas. This work may not be replicated or presented in whole or in part by any means electronic or otherwise without the express consent of the work’s Owner (copyright holder), with the exception of the private and non-commercial viewing by the reader who is also the end purchaser. ALL Rights Reserved, including but not limited to ownership of Characters, final content decision, and more. This is a work of Fiction. All the characters and events portrayed in this story are fictional and any resemblance to real people or incidents past, present or future is purely coincidental. Any and all images which may be shown within this work are taken through license under Corel with the exception of the title image which is Photo Credit to Irina Sheik. No affiliations, involvement or gender assignations through the use of these or any images of the subject or subjects contained within those posted images is to be implied, intended or inferred.
An Aldoennetti & Langtree Original.

Pam, meanwhile, has changed and put on her robe over her nightgown. I tell her that Tanner may be calling later and I need to speak with him if he does.

I stopped playing with the super detail images as I’m not certain she needs to know about any of this... especially the super detail part and the likelihood that my camera isn’t ‘my’ camera but one which was sent to me by mistake. I go back to their photo program and play with the lower resolution images which turns out to be a bit less than satisfying now. Once having seen all that detail, I want it in everything. I hope Tanner returns soon.

I’m about to give up and prepare for bed. Pam is in her’s and reading one of my books about London. She doesn’t seem natural without a book in her hands. My laptop has just gone to sleep and I’m pulling the power cord from it’s external supply as the phone rings.

“Hello?.. Oh, Tan. I need to speak with you and show you something... Yes, it’s important, and no it won’t wait until tomorrow... Thank you. I’ll explain more when I meet with you, see you there.” I hang up the phone and thank God the battery on my laptop is fully charged. “Pam, I shouldn’t be long. I’ll knock twice before entering so you will know it’s me.”

I rush out to meet Tanner, carrying my laptop and my purse. I’m waiting at the elevator when the doors open and Tanner steps out.

“Okay, Kat. What’s so important?”

“Could we go somewhere private where me may safely talk?” I whisper to him.

He gives me a funny look and we go downstairs to a secluded spot in the lobby.

“Now. What’s so important?”

I look around nervously, droop my shoulders and wake up my laptop. Soon I have my program running and in the photo file. I minimize it and bring up the program his ‘friends’ put on my computer. Going to the file which shows the child’s face in the window of the landing plane, I zoom in until the window with a blur behind it may be seen.

“This is the level of detail which your friend’s program shows for this photo. Notice the file size is three point one-six Megabytes? Now look at this...” I bring my program on line and zoom it to the same level. The face in the window is clearly discernable. “This file size is thirty seven point two-one Megabytes. That’s more than ten times the size of the file your friend’s program reports. Not only that but the detail is unbelievable. Now watch...” I change images until I’m at the one showing the girls and I zoom to Pam’s eye once again then into the eye showing the reflection. The program placed by his friends doesn’t even come close.

“So? A difference in the compression.”

“Even I’m not that stupid, Tan. They sent me the wrong camera. This is some special thing which takes photos so detailed that they could be used for... Oh... Oh!”

“Like you said Kat. You’re not stupid. Just have fun with your camera. If something comes up in the photos then it’s a bonus otherwise you just have a digital camera which takes the photos you want. I wouldn’t show anyone the extreme detail of the photos however.”

“What if someone takes my camera and downloads the photos?”

“Then they’ll see the kinds of photos a fifteen Megapixel camera would take. It takes that special program to download the full detail and it won’t display that detail on the screen so they still can’t figure it out. You’re safe, Kat. I demanded that before anything else, so they went to great lengths to make certain your photos would appear to be what they actually are. A tourist’s photos of interesting things. The super detail won’t show up in any sort of normal inspection. Now. How DID you get into the extreme detail files?”

“I was hunting for them so I could see the photos on my normal photo viewer. It let’s me see all of them as thumbnails and I may set the size of the images so I may look through them quickly.”

“What’s it’s name?”

“Irfanview.”

“Spell that.”

“What are you going to do?”

“I’m going to let the office know there is a program out there which can read the special files.”

“It can read nearly fifty kinds of image and motion files as well as audio. I have all the plug ins.”

“Do me a favor... Hide your program so it is more difficult for someone to find.” He starts to get up then sits again. “Kat, if I put a few photos I’ve taken with my camera onto a disk, would you see if you can look at them with your ‘Iffyview’ thing?”

I scowl at him for disparaging my program, “Yes. I could see if it could open and display them. I’ve come up against some which it cannot open but not very many once you have all the plug-ins.”

He nods his head, “Good deal. Thanks for showing me that. Go on up and get some sleep now. We’ll be leaving about eight thirty, the flight is at eleven. Breakfast will be around seven.”

I get up and start to walk away, “Kat?” I turn around to see a hurt puppy dog look on his face, “Didn’t you forget something?” He points to me and to his mouth. I give him a look which says I’m considering all the pro’s and con’s then walk back to him, raise up on my toes putting one arm around his neck as I hang onto my laptop with the other and give him a kiss on his lips. I’m beginning to like this. NOW THAT’S SCARY.

We walk back to the elevator and I go back up to my room so I may prepare for bed. He wanders off toward the telephones.

On my way to my room and while changing as well, I’m thinking about my kissing Tanner. Of course fiancees would kiss so it’s just for the cover but... there’s something. This doesn’t make sense because I’m a guy. Why do I even think I like kissing another guy? Oh God, maybe Dad is right and there’s something wrong with me.

Sometime during the night I awaken crying, with Pam holding onto me as she sits at the side of my bed. It isn’t until the next morning that I realise I was leaning tight up against a girl with both of us in nightgowns as I was sobbing my eyes out and I didn’t even react to her presence except for the comfort while I was hurting. WHAT IN HELL IS WRONG WITH ME?

When we awaken the next morning I’m still in deep thought. After seventeen years is Dad going to be proven right? Oh, that’ll make the Reverend’s day. I can picture the next ten or twelve sermons detailing the depths of depravity to which I have sunk and the payments which will be demanded of me in hell. One of those payments will probably be the requirement that I let Dad pound me into the ground every day when he finally shows up down there. Suddenly the dream I had about Dad selling me to Emerson doesn’t seem all that farfetched.

What can I do to be me again? I mean... cripes... Here I am putting on a skirt suit, make up and jewelry and I’m about to spend yet another day as a girl. Not only that but I’ve committed to doing it for two years??? Committed. Yeah that’s probably what they need to do with me. I’m psycho. As nutty as a fruitca... Fruitcake?... oh yeah... Kissing a guy and liking it? Well — at least not disliking it.

It would be a bit difficult just now but maybe when I get back from these five weeks I can just disappear and become me again... OR... I could wait and make more money up until Tanner disappears from the scene then I could disappear at the same time and no one would be the wiser. I won’t have all the money I need but I’ll have enough to live on while I look for other work. Yeah... that might work. I only need to put up with about four months rather than two years and then I’m me again. Yeah...

“...rina? KATRINA! Are you listening?”

“What? Oh sorry Pam. I was doing some deep thinking.”

“We need to go. Breakfast started ten minutes ago. Tanner called. Didn’t you hear the phone?”

“Er... No. Sorry. Let’s go eat and then I’ll finish packing when we come back up.”

Breakfast was fast for me. I was far behind everyone else since I was spending my packing time thinking instead. The others are nearly ready to have their cases brought down from the rooms. I begin throwing my stuff together and manage to finish just as the knock comes at the door and the bellhop begins loading Pam’s stuff on his cart. Mine is ready seconds later and he takes it all down at once while I carry my purse and computer case. I’m not willing to part with the computer since it is important to my photographs as well as my research on the internet. I hope to learn more about people like myself. The only problem I’m having is deciding just what myself happens to be.

We spent about an hour checking our equipment and little electronic odds and ends through the gauntlet using the ATA Carnet’s. Tanner’s for his and Irina’s stuff and my little one for my camera, computer, CD/MP3 player and personal jewelry. Some of the others have them also for various small odds and ends which normally wouldn’t even need to be declared but due to black market operations we must show everything we are bringing into a country and then show it going out again. What a pain.

Everyone is finally happy, a relative term in this case, with us allowing us to finally by passed through to the gate where we await the aircraft which will take us to St. Petersburg... And wait... and wait. We finally receive the message that the aircraft had engine trouble and another was brought in to replace it. The replacement will be landing in about twenty minutes and taking off again less than twenty minutes after that. Understandable. It could happen to any airline.

~O~

St. Petersburg went well, I think. We had the opportunity to almost be tourists since we were shooting at many of the landmark spots. I took tons of photos... okay... okay so I took about a hundred. I downloaded them into my laptop and my camera was once again empty waiting for it’s golden moments in Moscow where I intend to again put it to use. I’ve collected some nice photos

At St. Petersburg we were in the Peter and Paul fortress, which was built back in the early seventeen hundreds to help protect against possible attack by the Swedish Army and Navy. Near the middle of the fortress is a beautiful Russian Orthodox Cathedral where an angel is holding a cross on the top of the spire, which is so tall it stands far above the city. They told us the angel and the spire are gilded so the colour remains relatively protected from most of the elements. The Cathedral is named the Peter and Paul Cathedral and is the burial place of the Russian Emperors and Empresses from Peter the Great through to Alexander III. It’s some wonderful history.

We took photos within the fortress and I came away with some of my own. Many of the buildings are historically significant to Russia. We paid to enter the Cathedral and the City Museum. It was worth it. There is even a Mint there which is one of only two places in Russia where coins and medals are produced. Even at the lower resolution I’m very happy with my photos.

During our travels we were taking photos at Peter the Great’s summer palace and at the State University. I took a photo of a statue of someone riding a horse but didn’t learn who it was until later when I showed the image to our interpreter. It’s a bronze of Peter the Great riding a horse and is appropriately named The Bronze Horseman. Sorry, I used lower resolution here so no one could see how much detail the really good ones could produce.

The press who watch us from time to time think it’s funny to have one of the models shooting pictures of everything and have dubbed me the ‘Fashionable Photographic Tourist’. I suppose it doesn’t translate well. They are becoming accustomed to my taking photos everywhere we go. Emerson’s people think it’s great publicity. Tanner told me to be careful when the ‘press’ are around since many times they are government agents and not truly ‘press’. Now I’m becoming paranoid.

Here in Moscow, Pam and I are sharing a room again and I’m beginning to wonder if Tanner hasn’t put her in with me as a chaperone of sorts. I’m still taking photos. I intend to have a terrific scrapbook.

Eventually Pam and I return to our room on the evening of the third day here. We’ll finish tomorrow and then actually have a day to sightsee before we fly out again. As usual I’m dealing with my photo collection when Pam returns to our room, having visited with the other girls for a while.
~O~
Moments after she arrives I discover Laura and Sacha are with her as well.

“Katrina, we think you need to know something if you haven’t noticed it yourself.”

That sounds sufficiently ominous that I close down my applications and shut off my computer as I turn my attention to the three of them.

“So what’s such a problem that the three of you need to visit me about it?” As if I didn’t know. I wonder how they found out about me?

Pam begins so I suppose they elected her spokeswoman, “Well... We have been keeping away from Tanner because you’re wearing that engagement ring and we have been respecting it.”

I look down at the ring and back up at them in puzzlement. So they haven’t been making plays for my ‘boyfriend’ because we are supposedly ‘engaged’?

“We... uh... Oh hell there’s no easy way. Kat, we all like you and don’t want to hurt you but if you don’t intend to remain engaged to Tanner then say so. Some of us would like a shot at him and we don’t like that floozy Elaine jerking his chain all the time behind your back. If you don’t do something soon she’ll manage to get him into her bed and then you can kiss that ring goodbye. It isn’t like you’ve been spending much time with him. If you don’t want him then I’d like a crack at him.”

I’m flabbergasted. “You... He... Elaine?”

They nod yes.

“How long?”

“Since the first day at St. Petersburg. You’ve got to pay attention to your man if you don’t want to lose him. As I said, we haven’t gone after him and we told Sasha to stay away out of respect for you but if it’s open season then we want a chance before Elaine grabs him up.”

“I’ll kill her. And him.”

“I don’t think it’s him so much as she’s been throwing herself at him. They’re downstairs in the bar right now having another ‘business’ meeting.”

“Thanks.” I storm out of the room and skip the damn elevator which runs like it was built a hundred years ago. I don’t know, maybe it was. I’m downstairs faster than it could have come up from the lobby to my floor anyway. I charge the bar setting fire to everything and anyone in my path. The hotel staff move quickly out of the way, no one wants to tangle with a she bear on the hunt.

I arrive in the bar to learn the girls were quite correct. I find Tanner and Elaine curled up together in an out of the way booth just off the darkest part of the bar.

“What’s this cozy little get together, Tan?”

“What? Oh, Kat. What cozy little get together?”

“You and this... this... trollop. Don’t think I haven’t noticed how she’s been throwing herself at you the past week and a half.”

Ms. Trollop decides to join the conversation with an uneducated retort, “Who are you to tell Tan, baby, who he can and can’t see, Miss High and Mighty?”

I hold up my hand with the engagement ring on it, “This gives me the right, floozy. Tanner is my fiancee and I’ll thank you to remove yourself from his arm and move back to the other side of the table where you belong.”

“Katrina, I can explain this.”

“Of course you can, Tanner. It’s a business meeting, right?”

“Yes, as a matter of fact.”

“Then where are the business materials? Why is she cuddled up against you like a caboose that forgot it belongs at the end of the train and not next to the engine?”

“It isn’t like that, Kat.”

“NO? Then why are all the other girls saying it is? And why is she still hugging up against you? She hasn’t even denied it but has intimated that I don’t belong here questioning her about it. If this is a business meeting then you won’t mind if I join you where she is sitting and she can move to the other side of the table where she belongs.”

“Butt out, bitch.” She says to me, “You don’t protect your territory then expect another girl to take it over.”

Tan gets a funny look on his face and turns his head toward Elaine then back at me.

“Well, Tanner are you going to tell her to move or shall I?”

“Katrina, baby... You’ve been replaced. A real woman has come into his life.”

This reference to my not being a real woman hits me pretty hard. My face goes pale and tears spring to my eyes. I never expected Tanner would tell someone about my condition. I thought I could trust him. The bitch actually has managed to still my tongue for a moment.

“Slept with her yet, MISTER Hamersley? I was wrong. You’re just like Emerson.” I pull the engagement ring off my finger and throw it at him, watch it bounce off and land on the table just missing his drink even as I’m turning to storm off to my room. As I go out the door of the bar I glance back and see the bitch admiring the ring which is now on her finger. I hope it cuts off the blood circulation. Tanner is just sitting there looking at it too. I’m so angry I could choke her... And him. I punch the elevator button for the thirtieth time and the elevator doors finally open so I’m in and on my way up to my room... Pam’s room, I’m leaving.

I call down for a bellhop then throw my stuff together, grab my purse and am ready to go just as a knock sounds at the door. Meanwhile Pam is sitting up in her bed looking at me wide eyed ever since I snapped on the lights when I entered the room. I open the door and indicate my bags to the bellhop who this time is a girl. She places them onto her cart and we are down the hall and eventually in the lobby where I ask for my passport and a ride to the airport. All that is settled very quickly and I’m out and on my way.

I arrive at the airport in about fifteen minutes as there isn’t all that much traffic this time of night despite the night activity in other parts of the city. I begin the process of changing my remaining tickets into one which will take me back to London and then home. I’m still pissed off. I don’t know why I ever thought this could work. I’m not a female so why in the hell did I ever agree to do this... this... stunt. Oh, Yeah, all that nice money which I never saw and will now never see. Hell, Tanner hasn’t even paid me for anything past that first gig. Oh, yeah... well... he did pay for two months on my apartment so I would have somewhere to come back to since I didn’t want to continue living at his place. But still, with all we’ve been doing and $5,000 just for the St. Peterburg part of the tour, he owes me a bundle. As if I’ll ever see it.

Now I get word that the first flight out is tomorrow morning at ten so I have just under twelve hours to wait around in the airport before my flight. Terrific. This just gets better and better. My tickets were all first class so they let me wait in the lounge.

I sit down and continue to fume. How could he tell her about me? Boy did I ever misread him. I think that little mistake has me more steamed than anything else. It wouldn’t have been so bad if it had seemed to be girl to girl but to tell her I’m not female? I could strangle him. “A real woman has come into his life,” I’m not going to forget that one very quickly.

As uncomfortable as it is sitting here, I still have fallen asleep. I know this because I had my usual and unusual nightmares, waking up around midnight with a crick in my neck. They have even turned the lights off in here so I can’t see much. It makes it easier to see out the windows though, not that there is much to see. I go to fiddle with my ring as I usually do to make certain it isn’t turned around on my finger when I discover it isn’t there. I panic and begin to glance around wildly before remembering I threw it at Tanner. God, I feel naked without it. I cry myself to sleep again.

More nightmares and more awakenings. “A real woman has come into his life.” OH!!! I’m so angry I could pull out her hair. In fact that doesn’t seem like such a bad idea. I should have done that before I left. Maybe I will go back and do just that then return here. There’s a lot of time before ten o’clock. I can still see Ms. Smug admiring my ring on her finger. How dare he give her my ring? He could at least have purchased another. Oh yes. It wasn’t like he gave it to a “real woman” now, was it? I can just see his logic. I’m not a “real woman” so it doesn’t count... I should pull out his hair, too.

The next time I awaken I think I can notice it is a little lighter out. I’m really beat. The nightmares and waking up over and over has just wiped me out. At least I finished St. Petersburg and Moscow so I’ll have some money coming. Would have been nice if I could have made it through the whole five weeks of the Emerson shoots and the four months until Tan moves on. I would have had enough money that I could have lived on it for a couple of years. Surely in that much time I could find another good job. Now all I’ve got is about a month’s rent prepaid and about a hundred dollars in my pocketbook. If Tanner pays me then I’ll be okay for a few more months so I could probably find something. As a guy.

“A real woman has come into his life.” Oh... that still makes me so mad. How could he?

Yes, it’s lighter out. I may make out detail. Aww shit! I’ve got to change my name back. Okay, I can go see his sister and do that. Or maybe not. What if he tries to get me for breach of contract? Damn signing that was one of my more stupid moves. It seemed so damned logical at the time, just like changing my name. He’s a spy all right, a master manipulator and little old me just fell right into it. Even the engagement ring. Of course I’m not a “real woman,” so that didn’t mean anything to him anyway. It probably wouldn’t have meant anything anyway since he was doing it as a business/ spy thing and not as a fiancee thing. Hell. That means I really didn’t have any reason to get so steamed up. But that floozy was treading on my territory. He’s my fiancee and... I mean he was my fiancee... Oh man. Am I ever fucked up. How could I be his fiancee when I’m not even a “real woman?” Damn, that still has me steamed. I wonder if they have any coffee around here? Oh great. My skirt looks like I slept in it. I begin laughing which causes the two people, who have come in to clean the room, to look at me strangely. Looks like I’ve slept in it. Well, I have. And what does it matter anyway? As soon as I get home I’m going to be a guy again since I’m not “A real woman.”

The next time I see Tanner I’m going to slap him so hard if he were here he’d go out through that window. Grabbing my purse and computer bag, I wander out in search of coffee and a clock. Rubles... Let’s see. I know I have Rubles. I manage to ask in moderately fluent Russian the cost of the coffee and roll, hoping I’m not asking for directions to the restrooms. The clock told me it is a little after six and the kiosk opened at six. I managed to pay for my coffee and roll, which looks a little strange but tastes great, and even put some extra money into the woman’s palm thanking her.

I take my sip of coffee and chew some more roll. Eventually I finish them both then find my way to a restroom before returning to the lounge again. About a quarter after Seven I awaken again to shake off my stupor.

Sometime around eight Pam, Tanner and Ms. Trollop come in. Tanner starts to talk and I slap him hard enough to nearly drop him to the floor then I start in on Ms. Trollop. A few seconds later Tanner is dragging me off her and Pam is between us. I don’t want to hurt her because she has been friendly to me the whole trip. I finally realise she is trying to say something and begin to calm down enough to listen. That’s when Mr. Big Mouth starts talking so I slap him again. He blocked most of it so it didn’t really do much.

“KAT, STOP IT. LISTEN TO ME.”

“Oh yes, listen to you, you... you... confidence breaker.”

He looks at me like he doesn’t understand.

“Don’t you look at me like that, you pig. You told her.”

Now he looks completely confused.

“Told who? What did I say?”

“You told her!” I point at the trollop who tries to bite my finger inciting me to more violence which Tanner managed to halt before it could really get underway.

“Told her what?” Tanner continues to pretend.

“You know what you told her. About me.”

Now everyone is looking at me like they are confused.

Tanner figures it out finally, “No I didn’t. What the hell makes you think that?”

“Now a REAL woman has come into his life.” I mimic in Ms. Trollops voice.

I’ll give him credit, he can really make his ‘I’m confused’ expression look convincing.

Meanwhile Ms. Trollop has come close enough that I slap her good and hard again.

Tanner corrals me and drags me away from her.

“Kat. Kat, stop this crap and listen to me.”

I quit squirming and look at him angry as hell and twice as dangerous. He pulls me tight so I can’t move then kisses me. That surprises me.

“Kat. I didn’t tell her a damn thing. You’re taking the sentence out of context. She doesn’t know.” He whispers to me.

A little louder, “Here’s your ring back,” he puts it on my finger again, “ and here is her ticket for the rest of the trip. She’s using yours and is returning to the States.”

“Wha... What?” I do so love how intelligent I sound when I’m confused. It’s so much easier to be angry.

“I spoke with Emerson and she’s out. I’m sorry. I didn’t see what she was doing. She’s going back to the States today and you have the tour to finish.”

“Then why didn’t you come tell me last night?”

“I didn’t know you had gone. I thought you went up to your room and I wanted to give you time to cool off.”

“Then how did she know about me?”

“She doesn’t. Think about the sentence. She wasn’t saying it the way you thought.”

I give the sentence some more thought and finally realise my error. I’ve been angry all night over a misinterpretation of her sentence. My face turns red, “Oh.”

A few moments go by and I reach up to gently touch his face where even now a red mark is beginning to raise up where I all but punched him.

“You slap pretty hard, lady.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Me too.” We both laugh a little at that one.

“When did you find out I’d left?”

“This morning at breakfast when I asked Pam if you were over being angry with me. She told me you left last night. That’s when I called Emerson and told him to get Elaine out of here or the shoot was cancelled and he could deal with my lawyers. Then I came here to find you and to ship her out.”

“You barely made it.”

“I put a hold on your ticket. They wouldn’t have let you board.”

“I didn’t think of that.”

“I’m glad. Now Miss Van Derholt, do you forgive your boyfriend?”

“I suppose so. But I want to see Ms. Trollop over there fly out of here before I will be completely mollified.”

“Well, that should occur in about an hour or so. I can release the ticket again now. Pam was worried about you. She wouldn’t let me come here without her.”

“I’ll go thank her. The whole thing escalated the moment Elaine said that “real woman” crack. It really hurt.”

“I can understand. I didn’t see how badly it had affected you last night but now the whole fiasco makes sense. You thought I betrayed your confidence and you felt upset with both her and me. It’s understandable.”

“But not correct.”

“No, not correct.”

I look at his face again and wince, “I’m afraid your face is going to be more than just red soon. I think it’s going to be black and blue.”

“Really?” Trying to see himself in a reflection off the window but the outside is too bright to allow much of a reflection, “Well then I guess you’ll have to make it up to me until the swelling and colour go down.”

“And how might I do that?”

“I’ll accept gentle kisses on a frequent basis during that time.”

I raise onto my toes and softly kiss his face.

“Ouch... that hurt. This may become a bit more of a pain than I thought.”

“You need an ice pack and a nursemaid. I’m beat and need some sleep. Maybe... Just today... I’ll sleep in your room and cuddle with you so you know you’re loved again. If you can behave yourself. Otherwise I’m right back here and out on the next flight.”

“I accept, fair maiden. I’ll give the crew today off and we’ll finish up tomorrow. We’re ahead of schedule so it won’t hurt too badly.” as he reaches up to his face and jerks away from his own hand, “on the other hand perhaps it will.”

to be continued