Changes~28

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Our lips parted. Her sweet, pretty face was flushed. Her lipstick had smudged and I wondered if mine had too.
She grabbed a couple of tissues from a box on the small table and gently wiped away my tears.
I did the same for her; it was such a tender moment.
Changes

Chapter 28

By Susan Brown


 
 

And when I touch you I feel happy inside.
It’s such a feeling that my love
I can’t hide, I can’t hide, I can’t hide.

Yeah, you’ve got that something,
I think you’ll understand.
When I’ll say that something
I want to hold your hand,
I want to hold your hand,
I want to hold your hand.
The Beatles: I want to hold your hand.

Previously…

I heard her move, was she leaving me, not able to face someone like me. Had I failed…?

Then, I drew my breath in as I felt her arms around me and through my tears, I looked up into her face. She was crying too. She didn’t have to say anything because I knew instantly that she accepted me for who, and what, I was–a woman. Our lips met and I could taste the saltiness of our combined tears as we cemented our love, a love that I dearly hoped would last the test of time.

And now the story continues…

Our lips parted. Her sweet, pretty face was flushed. Her lipstick had smudged and I wondered if mine had too. She grabbed a couple of tissues from a box on the small table and gently wiped away my tears. I did the same for her; it was such a tender moment.

‘So, you don’t think I’m a freak?’

‘Don’t you dare say that again, Sam. You’re no more a freak than I am. I love you for what’s in your heart and soul and when I look at you, all I see is an attractive woman, trying her hardest to blossom despite all the bad things that have happened to her.’

I touched her smooth face with my hand; I thought that it was so wonderful that she felt like that about me. All my worries seemed to fly away as I gazed at her sweet face.

‘It must’ve been hard for you also,’ I suggested.

‘When?’

‘When you discovered that you was a girl and not a boy?’

‘It was in a way, but, you see, I wasn’t really like other boys. I was always smaller, gentler and not into the rough and tumble which is normally part of being a boy.’

I speculated on just how tough it must have been–finding out that he was, in fact, a she.

‘Then,’ she continued, ‘I began getting a few aches and pains down below–nothing specific but just a general feeling of being unwell.’

We stood up and, holding hands, strolled down the steps into the garden. The borders were vibrant with colour and the Lily pond was still and tranquil. I could see fish swimming around in the crystal-clear water, the light reflecting on their golden and silver bodies. It was so peaceful here; there were several cats around, but mostly they were asleep in the warm sun and weren’t disturbed by our leisurely saunter through Abby’s enchanting garden.

‘So, what happened next?’ I asked.

‘You know how, at school, boys tend to compare each other’s manly attributes?’

‘Yes, I know exactly what you mean.’

‘Like in the showers where boys sort of compare each other–big being beautiful, I suppose even at that ridiculously young age. Well you must have gone through all that. Anyway, my manhood wasn’t much to write home about compared to even the smallest boy. Then there was my chest–when I was about eleven, I became aware of it getting itchy and sore.’

‘It must have been awkward hiding everything.’

‘It certainly was, and you must remember, I still thought that I was a hundred percent male. Imagine how I felt when on top of everything, my breasts started budding. I hid them at first–even from my parents–by wearing loose tee-shirts and sweaters. Then, one day I was playing football–I was useless, but it was part of the games lesson so I had no choice but to play–anyway, someone kicked the ball at me and it hit me in the chest. The pain was so bad that I blacked out. I woke up in hospital and discovered what was really happening with my body. As soon as the doctors saw my chest and how pathetic I was down below, they did some tests. They x-rayed me and then did an ultrasound scan which showed that I was intersexed. I couldn’t believe it and neither could my parents. We didn’t know what to do but the doctors explained that I had all the female bits except my vagina’s opening was closed by a layer of skin; my male organs were non-functioning except as somewhere to wee through. After some soul searching by my parents and long talks with me, it was decided that the best thing for me was to have corrective surgery so I could be a fully-functioning girl.’

‘Was it a hard decision to make?’

‘Not really. All my life I’d felt like a square peg in a round hole, so I suppose the decision was inevitable. I couldn’t be a proper boy, but I could be a proper girl. Anyway, here I am, a women and happy to be one.’

We settled on a bench overlooking a small lawn and flower beds.

‘So,’ I asked, ‘where do we go from here?’

She gazed at me and kissed me gently on the lips, sending more tingles down my spine, which was something that Olivia had not succeded in doing for years. ‘Where would you like to go from here?’ she asked.

‘I don’t want to let you out of my sight, now I’ve found you, but I suppose we should be sensible and grown up about it.’ A wisp of hair had flopped over her eyes so I brushed it aside with my hand.

‘I suppose,’ she sighed.

We looked at each other being all serious and glum and then began to giggle.

‘This is no good.’ I sighed. ‘I want to be near you always and joined at the hip at least, but we must to be sensible. Let’s take it slowly; I might have habits you don’t like and you might pick your nose or something–’

That set us off giggling like schoolgirls once more and only stopped when we embraced warmly and explored each other’s soft, willing mouths again.

We spent a long time discussing our hopes and fears. It turned out that we had so much in common–our love of the arts, the countryside and Penmarris in particular and many other things.

I stayed with her for the rest of the day deriving pleasure from her company and looking after the cats and kittens. It was one of the happiest days of my life and I sincerely hoped it would be the first of many. We realised, however, that we needed to be careful. We had both been hurt in our lives, Abby in a failed relationship a few years ago and me by Olivia. We had to try to hold back for a while so we could make sure that we were not making a dreadful mistake.

We agreed to see each other every day and, work permitting, spend as much time as possible together. That way, we would learn and grow closer and then, who knows what might happen.

We kissed and embraced each other passionately as we bade our farewells, whispering soft endearments and our love for each other. Finally, wrenching myself away, I returned home to my cottage and my thoughts.

I was so pleased I had taken my courage in both hands and opened up my heart to her. I unlocked my front door and made for the kitchen. Making myself a cup of tea, I seemed to be on autopilot as my thoughts kept returning to Abby.

I went upstairs and sat on the balcony overlooking the harbour to drink my tea. It was getting later now and the sun was dipping towards the horizon of the now calm sea. Holidaymakers were packing up their paraphernalia before going back to their hotels and B&Bs, and locals were wending their way home after a busy day in the shops, tea rooms and souvenir kiosks. Penmarris tended to slow down after about five o’clock and that seemed appropriate. Who wanted discos and rowdy beach parties stretching into the wee small hours? This just wasn’t that sort of place. I was getting hungry but, once again, didn’t fancy cooking. I could have cod and chips, but I’d had that last night. I smiled to myself as I realised that I hadn’t had the other delicacy I loved so much.

I picked up my bag, put on a cardie as there was a slight chill in air now and set off down to the harbour. The smell emanating from the fish and chip shop made my mouth water, as usual, and I wondered how much money I would make if I bottled it and sold it an eBay?

I entered the brightly-lit shop and there was the girl I had seen this morning on the lifeboat–the coxswain–serving behind the counter.

‘Hello.’ I greeted her.

She looked up from turning over the chips in the fryer and smiled.

‘Hello. Samantha, isn’t it?’

‘Yes, that’s me, my friends call me Sam. Hey, didn’t I see you on the lifeboat this morning?’

‘Yeah, ’Twere a bugger of a weather wern it? I’m Grace, by the way.

‘Hi, Grace, nice to know you,’ I replied.

‘Just make sure you don’t make any quips about Grace Darling;1 I’ve got right pee’d off with them over the years; it’s been goin’ on ever since I was a schoolgirl.’ She grinned.

‘I don’t know how you dare to do it.’

‘Do what?’

‘Go out in mountainous seas to rescue people in distress.’

‘’T’s in me blood I s’pose. Both me Dad and me Granddad before ’im were cox’ns so I’m the third cox’n in the fam’ly. Y’see, when I was a littl’un I was a tomboy and Dad used to take me out in our boat and taught me all the sandbanks and hazards round about here. Most times when I wasn’t in school I hung out around the lifeboat house, so I got to learn all about the boat, and help out, like, by cleanin’ and helpin’ the mechanic, and yearning to be old enough so I could join the crew and serve under me Dad.’

‘Well I think it’s such a marvellous thing you do–you all do, and sooo brave.’

‘Gaarn, don’t be daft. So, what’ll ya have, Sam?’

‘Erm, haddock and chips?’

‘Haddock’s off, m’dyearr; do y’a nice bit o’ cod, though?’

‘Can I have a saveloy2 and chips?’

‘Coming up, Sam.’

Grace did her stuff and handed me a parcel containing my supper. I paid her saying, ‘Thanks, Grace,’ and left the shop.

I found an empty bench overlooking the harbour to eat my saveloy–which for the uninitiated is a large sort of sausage–and chips. My thoughts, as usual were about Abby and I was looking forward to seeing her again tomorrow…

‘Hello, Sam.’

Startled, I looked up and there was Katie. ‘Hi, Katie, fancy a chip?’

Saveloy___chips.jpg

‘Trying to give them up–oh, go on then, one or two won’t make that much difference to my hips.’

She sat beside me and started making inroads into my meal.

‘Hey, leave some for me.’ I chided her.

‘You’ll thank me tomorrow.’

‘I doubt it and leave my saveloy alone–’

‘Spoil sport.’

‘If you’re that hungry; go buy some of your own.’

‘That’s okay, I’ll make do with yours.’

‘I had an interesting chat with our cox’n girl in the chippy,’ I told Katie.

‘Grace?’

‘Yeah, she’s the bravest girl I’ve ever met; amazing, isn’t she?’

Katie started giggling; ‘I hope you didn’t tell her that,’ she said, and I had to think back for a moment before I realised what I had said and began giggling too.

With Katie’s unwelcome help, I finished my meal and, after throwing the remains in the waste bin I sat down next to her again.

‘Is your phone working?’ She asked.

I took it from my bag and found it was dead as a dodo. What with everything going on, I had forgotten to charge it.

‘No, why?’

‘I’ve been trying to get you today. I’ve had a phone call from your father-in-law.’

My stomach dropped through the floor making my choice of meal somewhat iffy.

‘Nigel? What did he want?’

‘To meet with you?’

‘Me? Why?’

‘I don’t know. He tried to get me to give him your address; naturally, I declined to give him such personal information.’

‘Good; how did he take it?’

‘Well he was a bit abusive, but after I mentioned the fact that all calls were recorded, he seemed to quieten down slightly.’

‘I wonder why he wants to see me?’

‘Probably to try pressuring you into not divorcing Olivia, or something. I don’t know.’

‘Well at least you’ve put him off. The last thing I want is to see him now.’

‘Oh.’

‘What do you mean, “Oh”?’ I countered.

She appeared rather embarrassed. ‘I said that I’d have a word with you and, subject to your approval, he could meet you in my office tomorrow at eleven.’

‘Why did you say that?’ I asked.

She looked at me and smiled. ‘It’s always useful to know how the enemy’s thinking. If you see him tomorrow, I suggest that it will only happen if I’m present. He might behave rather better with me there and we’ll also get some idea of his plans. What do you think?’

I didn’t really want to see him, but I could see the sense in it. How would he react when he sees that Tom is no longer a man but a woman, I had no idea, but I wasn’t going to roll over for him or his precious daughter any more. So I made the decision.

‘I’ll be there at eleven.’

_________________________

gracedarling.jpg     1 Grace Darling: Grace Darling was 22 years old when she risked her life in an open boat to help the survivors of the wrecked SS Forfarshire on 7 September 1838. With her father, she rowed for over a mile through raging seas to reach them. The courage that Grace and her family showed on that day is now legendary.
see: Grace Darling Story.

2 Saveloy: A large pork sausage, often battered then deep-fried and served with chips (French fries in US). see: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Saveloy


To Be Continued...

Angel

The Cove By Liz Wright

Please leave comments...thanks! ~Sue

Edited by Gabi and posted by her at Sue’s request.

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Comments

love the story ...

amyzing's picture

... some of the food is frightening, though.

Battered, deep-fried sausage? Honey darlin' chile, I grew up in the south (of the united states; I gather that "south" has rather a different meaning in the UK), where "if it ain't fried, it ain't fit t' eat," and even here ... omigawd. My arteries quail at the thought, even with the assurance that they'll never be any closer than this to ... that.

Amy!
(obligate vegetarian, so possibly a bit over the top)

Honey, Down here in the

Honey,

Down here in the South, we will deep fry _anything_. Ice cream, bacon, sausages, even pickles! And it's all good! 'course, we don't eat that kind of thing every day....

Janice

Anything?

In Scotland, the chippies sell deep fried Mars bars*

*In the UK the "Mars bar" is a slab of nougat-like chocolate mousse topped with caramel and coated in chocolate.

The South

Amy, honey, it's the South, with a capital "S". And if you grew up in The South and are a vegetarian, you must have Yankee parents. No true Child Of The South would ever admit to being a veggie, vegen, whatever it is. ;-)

m

Damaged people are dangerous
They know they can survive

FWIW

I agree about the battered deep fried sausage. My arteries sympathize with your arteries.

Kim

Cliffhanger alert

... so she is going to meet in person with the Ogre ?

Oh, boy. No time like this to get what you want by possibly threatening him to make this whole sitch public knowledge and ruining his career. Once he sees what she looks like, that will make him change his tune.

Katie is not thinking straight though. It would make more sense to have the meet somewhere outside of Penmarris away from her office. Lawyers and their offices *sigh*. That way, Nigel will not be able to come and directly harass Samantha.

Kim

Changes...Every Day.

I agreeKimmie. I had exactly the same thought. I mean it's already too late. Since a lawyer from Penmarris contacted the Ogre, he already has investigators and photographers crawling all over the joint. As far as that goes, bet they are developing pictures of Sam kissing Abbs right now, to prove it was all poor Sam's fault!

This is just a super story, Sue. I love all your stuff, as you know, but I really do think
your writing just keeps getting better. Except for the fact that you just set poor
Sam up!!! And that deep fried saussage thing! I grew up in South Carolina, and my cousins didn't even know what bacon was. They used to deep fry fatback, ant then poor some of the drippings on their grits for breakfast every day! I feel like I need to go and take half an asprin! LOL.

Sarah Lynn

Hmmm, I'm a bit slow today

Hmmm, I'm a bit slow today and I had to read the line several times before I got the "Amazing Grace" joke. I've not had my breakfast yet and all this talk of sausage in batter and chips is making me really hungry!

I loved the touching scenes with Abby as she and Sam got to know each other, but this meeting with the father in law is worrying - I shall be nervously waiting to see how it turns out.

Pleione

Amazing Grace

Amazing Grace, how sweet the sound,
That saved a wretch like me....
I once was lost but now am found,
Was blind, but now, I see.

I wouldn’t have been surprised to see these lyrics at the start of this episode. They work on a number of different levels.

Susan, thank you for what you have, and are contributing here. Your work is compelling reading, and every installment of Changes is a gem. You can count me among your loyal readers.

Panegyric Sparkling

So Mr Nasty

is going to meet Sam for the first time is he!! I'd bet that he's expecting to meet someone who he can bully into dropping divorce proceedings....Little does he know!!

Glad to see everything is working out so well with Sam's love life it's not often in life you meet someone like Abby, Someone who you can connect with on every level, Thankfully Abby felt exactly the same about Sam and this is one love story that you just hope has a happy ending!!

Kirri

Sudden Storms

terrynaut's picture

Hey! Weather storms hit Penmarris cove. Why not have the occasional person storm. Nigel will be blowing in and blowing out just as fast I gather. Hmph!

Forget about Nigel though. I want more Abby and Samantha action! I'm shameless. I know. I loved their exchanges and giggling. They've got it SO bad.

I don't understand why they have to be so 'sensible' about their budding relationship. Abby isn't exactly on the rebound and really, when you think about it, neither is Samantha. She lived and loved an illusion.

The only problem I see is their living arrangement. It sounds like both Abby and Samantha have wonderful places to live. How can either give up their homes? Wah!!

Okay. I'm going to bed now.

Thanks for the story. That goes for you too, Gabi. :)

- Terry

Sue, I am glad you decide to have

Sam's & Abby take their new relationship slow l kinda hope you keep our favorite transgirl "single" for awile don't get me wrong l don't mind if sam get a little sumthin' sumthin' sometimes just don't have them "pick out curtins" anythime soon! anyway can't wait to see what happends when Nigel comes to town!

Ah, But Now That Olivia

Is preggers, or possibly aborting the poor child, her dad may now be rethinking things.

    Stanman
May Your Light Forever Shine
    Stanman
May Your Light Forever Shine

Nice going Sue!

I also keep forgeting to thank Gabi for her hard work - thanks Gabbi.

We also have Saveloys in OZ, also the small ones Cheerios and in the north there called 'Little Boys'! (I wonder why)
Served hot and dipped in Tomatoe sauce, there great!

LoL
Rita

Age is an issue of mind over matter.
If you don't mind, it doesn't matter!
(Mark Twain)

LoL
Rita

Careful,Rita!

joannebarbarella's picture

You'll have them all rushing over to savour our battered savs and dagwood dogs and licking the ketchup off the little boys, not to mention fried dimsims, pies with mushy peas and floaters. All the culinary delights of Oz!

Actually, I think it's a good idea for Nigel to meet Samantha in the solicitor's office. I hope he loses his cool and insults her in front of witnesses. Then she may be able to charge him with slander as well. Can't wait,
Joanne

Nigel's Call and Children

RAMI

It is interesting that Nigel called himself, and is apparently coming by himself and not with his attorney or Olivia's attorney. Nigel is smart enough to know that meeting with an attorney present is possibly dangerous to his daughter's cause. Since he is not a party to the action, Katie can speak to him without Olivia's attorney being present and anything he says can be used against his daughter.

I think that he is probably well aware what Sam looks like and will not be shocked when she shows up. I think he will be there to either try and arrange a reconciliation or find an amicable settlement. I think it is possible that Nigel want's a grandchild, knows of Tom's desire to be a father and may use that to try and convince Samantha that the child is actually his and to return to Olivia who will agree to have the child if Tom even as Samantha agrees to return.

Abby is apparently a complete "woman" capable of having a child. Does she want to be a mother? How will that effect her relationship with Samantha who now wants to go the "whole way" and make a complete transformation? Will Samantha be willing to keep that last part of Tom, if Abby wants that to happen? Will, Samantha be willing to have normal heterosexual intercourse with Abby to accomplish this? Or will that become a stumbling block to their relationship?

RAMI

RAMI

RAMI, How do you know

that Nigel will be the only one at the meeting? (has Sue leak some upcoming plot detales to you) maybe he might have his attorney there? maybe Olivia's? hell he might have Olivia there!(sucks for Samantha, entertainment for us)

Wonderful

This is such a wonderful story. Who cares if Sam is very passable and Abby is beautiful? The story is great. I was crying at the end of the last chapter.

Right now I've only read up to Sam leaving Abby's house. I thought of something and had to comment. It just seemed that in the story, one would move in with the other. I understand that it would be impractical and all, as the story is written makes much more sense.

> We agreed to see each other every day and, work permitting, spend as much time as possible together. That way, we would learn and grow closer and then, who knows what might happen. <

However, my above thought reminded me of an old joke (and I can't remember or compose good wording):

Q: What happens in lesbian dating?

A: On the second date you bring the U-Haul.

I hope most of you get the idea. I mauled the joke pretty badly.

Hugs and Bright Blessings,
Renee

Hugs and Bright Blessings,
Renee

Samantha & Abby: Love at first sight...

Ole Ulfson's picture

Yes it does! My father used to kid me that I found love at first sight at least twice a week.

In reality it only happened twice. I still love both girls though I haven't seen one for 48 years and have been married to the other for more than 40 years and hope we can have 1 or 2 more. But I remember that wonderful moment of meeting and knowing and immediate love.

Thanks for the memories...

Ole

We are each exactly as God made us. God does not make mistakes!

Gender rights are the new civil rights!