One Bridge, Two Exits

By Maggie the Kitten

Two friends meet for lunch and are told a bridge is the key to their dreams come true.

Paula pulled up in front of Kathy’s house and waited for her friend to come out. She was really excited. It had been nearly six month she’d seen her last and that had been in the parking lot of the company they both used to work for on Kathy’s last day on the job. She had moved on to another job while Kathy continued working on the assembly line.

Paula smiled when she thought about her friend who was more like a sister, “little sister” actually. Over the two years they’d worked together they’d really grown close. They had shared their stories, their dreams, their hopes and their fears during long days and late nights.

Paula felt so close to Kathy that she trusted her with her deepest secret, and that was her love for a man named Armando. She’d loved him ever since she was a little girl and he was just a man who was sweet to her. As she grew her love for him grew and when she became a woman, she loved him like one.

Unfortunately by the time she was able to give him her love, he had become involved with another, and soon afterward so had Paula. Since then, the two women continued to love and want each other from afar. They both hoped that someday they could eventually be together, but it seemed impossible. This was Paula’s greatest secret, greatest desire and greatest source of both sadness and happiness. She shared it with Kathy because she knew that Kathy would understand what an impossible dream is.

Kathy or Kitten as she was known in the factory, definitely knew the meaning of an impossible dream. And just as Paula had shared her deepest, most secret dream with Kathy, Kathy had shared hers with Paula. Kathy’s dream was about love too, but not the adult romantic version that Paula and Armando shared. Kathy’s dream was the type of love a child has for her mother.

Now that might seem a strange dream for a woman in her mid forties, but Kathy was not a typical woman in more ways than one. She’d been born in a boy’s body. She had been the invisible little girl growing up. No one saw her, no one heard her and no one had believed she existed, except Kathy. When she got older, she went to therapy, took hormones and eventually had surgery. It took her awhile, but finally she lived and worked and looked sort of like a woman, but Paula knew the truth. Kathy wasn’t a woman; she was still that little girl from long ago.

Yes, that doesn’t seem possible, but it was true. Paula had read about that little girl in the stories Kitten wrote and shared with her, but it was in Kathy’s eyes that she could really see the little girl. It was those eyes, the eyes that grew large, that would fill with a child’s joy when she talked about being with the mommy and sisters of her dreams, and it was those same eyes that filled with tears when the pain of knowing that would never happen was just too much for her. That had been when Paula would hug her as if she was a true little sister, and Kathy would hang on tight as the tears fell freely.

Paula’s Armando was states away, but yet at times seemed so close when she talked to him on the phone. Kathy’s dream family was much closer. The mommy of her dreams was actually a boss in the warehouse they worked in, but because it was impossible for Kathy to ever really be Lauri’s daughter, at times she seemed a world a way.

Armando knew how much Paula loved him and he returned that love, but both felt trapped and neither could reach the other.

Lauri knew how much Kathy loved her and wanted to be her daughter and a part of her family, and it touched her deeply. If she could have made magic she would have, and she would have taken Kathy home as her own.

But she couldn’t make magic and there was nothing she could do. They were four people trapped.

Paula was sitting in her car outside Kathy’s home when she looked up and saw the front door open. Out stepped Kathy, and when Paula saw her she smiled lovingly. Kathy was dressed in clothes more suited to the little girl she was at heart. She was wearing a denim jumper, t-shirt, white hose and Mary Jane shoes. Her hair was up in pig tails and she was smiling wide. If she hadn’t been 42 and nearly six foot tall, she’d look like any other little girl you’d see running the playground.

Paula got out of her car and met Kathy on the sidewalk. She hugged her tightly, and as always, Kathy hung on for as long as she could. Once they finally broke the hug, they got in Paula’s car and headed out for lunch.

Kathy bounced in the seat excitedly as she told Paula all the latest on Lauri, including how close she’d got with her new boyfriend Jeff. Paula giggled. She loved to see the little girl peeking out of her friend, and in those cute clothes, it was hard to think of her as anything else.

Paula filled Kathy in on the latest about her daughter, Kenya who was coming home from Honduras, how big her son Darian was getting, and of course, the latest on the world’s greatest long distance romance with Armando.

They’d been driving for nearly thirty minutes and chatting away before they realized they hadn’t decided where to have lunch. Kathy was terrible at making decisions, so Paula, forever the big sister, took the lead and decided to stop at a little Italian place someone from work had mentioned.

Ten minutes later they were walking in the front door of “Momma Rosa’s”. As soon as the two girls walked in, the smells from the kitchen made them think they’d died and gone to Italian Heaven.

They were seated quickly and had just ordered some garlic bread for an appetizer when an old woman stopped by their table. She introduced herself as Momma Rosa, and asked if she could sit with them for a minute. Both Paula and Kathy were surprised, but told her she was more than welcome to share the table.

The elderly woman looked first to Paula and then to Kathy. “Your hearts are heavy, children. Both of you are separated from the one you love most. Is this true?”

Paula and Kathy’s eyes went wide as they looked at each other and then at Momma Rosa.

Kathy was speechless but Paula said what they were both thinking. “Yes it is, but how could you know that?”

Momma Rosa smiled, “Because my mother and her mother and her mother before that, knew such things. It is a gift, and yet a curse.”

Kathy asked, “How could it be a curse?”

“Being able to see into someone’s heart is not always a happy thing.” The old woman sighed heavily, “Sometimes you find happiness and love and joy, and sometimes you find pain and hurt and sometimes you find cold, dark, and evil.”

Kathy’s face went white, making the old woman smile. “No child, I sense nothing cold, dark or evil coming from either of you, but I felt your sadness, your hurt and your longing when you came in. I knew then I had to come to you, and if I can, I have to help you.”

Paula’s beautiful dark eyes smiled at Momma Rosa, “You can help us? But how … you don’t even know what makes us happy and yet so sad, or … do you?”

Momma Rosa extended her hand. “Let me hold your hand my dear, and I will tell you what I know.”

Paula put her out hand, and in doing so, showed her trust and faith in the hand of the old woman. Momma Rosa held it gently and then closed her eyes. “You have loved him for so long, long before you should have known the meaning of the word love and yet you did. You were but a child, but you loved him as a woman even then. His smile … yes his smile, oh there is love in that smile. Yes I can see that. The sound of his voice touches your very soul and he … yes he loved you even then, but you were forbidden fruit? First, you were too young, and then … then … you belonged to another. His nephew? Yes …his nephew. Oh pain and sadness now. Separated by age at first, then by family, and now, by distance, but the love ... still grows for you both. Two hearts who long to beat as one. Two soul mates separated by a wide river with no bridge to cross. His name is Armando.”

When Momma Rosa opened her eyes, Paula’s were filled with tears, for the old woman had spoken the truth.

Momma Rosa squeezed Paula’s hand. “Now … now there, child. All is not lost … love always finds a way. The bridge you seek will come very soon, and once you step into his arms you will never be separated again. This I know to be true.

Paula’s sad tears turned to joyous ones. “Oh, Momma Rosa, I so hope you are right. I love him so much and I want to be with him so much.”

Momma Rosa laughed, “Yes child I know you do, just as he loves you and needs you to complete him. Soon Paula, very soon the two of you will be one.”

Paula sighed dreamily as Momma Rosa released her hand and then turned to Kathy. “Will you let me see into your heart Kathy? You need not be frightened. I have a soft spot for children.”

Tears welled in Kathy’s eyes. Already Momma Rosa was looking into her heart. Kathy nodded silently and placed her hand in hers. Momma Rosa closed her eyes.

“Sadness, alone …want … so much want and tears … crying and crying and no one can hear, no one can see. Poor little girl. She’s lost … lost and frightened and searching ….searching for what? A way out … but out of where? Oh my yes … trying to get out of a prison is it? Yes, trapped, so trapped …and no way out. Poor little girl all alone. No one to play with. No one to talk to. No one to hold her. No one to teach her. No one to love her. Home … home … she wants to go home. Over and over again, she cries to go home, but there is no home to go to. She looks for her mommy, she looks everywhere and she looks so long but she can’t find her.
“And then … then there she is! So beautiful, so smart, so funny, so loving, so …everything she always wanted and needed. Mommy! Mommy! Here I am Mommy. See me, please see me. Want me. Love me. Take me home Mommy. I wanna go home. I wanna go home, but … but Mommy can’t reach you can she? Like Paula and Armando, the two of you are separated by a wide river with no bridge to cross. Her name is Lauri.”

Kathy was crying and rocking when Momma Rosa opened her eyes. “Little one and I do mean LITTLE ONE; you truly are the child of your stories and of your heart and the one that shows in your eyes. I do see you, just as Paula sees you and Lauri sees you. Don’t cry little one. I know you hurt and you are scared and you are frustrated, but I promise you, there is a bridge for you as well. This bridge will lead you home, home to the body and the family and the life you so long for. Trust me. This I know to be true.”

“But … but how and when?” Kathy cried

The old woman sighed, “Children have no patience and lots of questions. How? I do not know how, and I do not know exactly when, but soon, very soon. This I know.”

Paula reached out and took Kathy’s hand, tears of joy on both their cheeks.

“And I know something else.” Momma Rosa teased.

“What’s that?” The two women asked.

“Your food is ready.” she answered with a smile. As if on cue, and there probably had been one, the waiter returned with two heaping plates of pasta.

The old woman got up as the waiter served Paula and Kathy.

“Wait, please don’t go!” cried Kathy. “Tell us more.”

Momma Rose shook her head. “I’ve told you all I can. There is nothing more I can do. Eat, enjoy and when you find your bridge, your dream will come true.”

Without another word, she left them and returned to the kitchen. Paula and Kathy dug in to some of the best lasagne and garlic bread they’d ever eaten, but as good as the food was, the hope that Momma Rosa had given them that was even more satisfying, filling their hearts with joy.

When they finally finished they went to the counter to pay. Paula asked to speak to Momma Rosa but the cashier said she’d already left, but not without a final message. The cashier gave a note to Paula who read it aloud to Kathy.

“In your souls the two of you are connected as if you truly were sisters. Your destines are connected, too. Together, find the bridge that has one entrance but two exits, and each of you will find the dream and the love you seek.”

Kathy asked in disbelief, “One entrance but two exits?”

Paula shrugged her shoulders. She was just as puzzled by the riddle.

The two women walked out to the car. As they got in, Kathy looked at Paula. “So where do we go now?”

Paula smiled, “Where else! We’ve got go find that bridge!”

Paula started the car and off the two girls went on a bridge hunt.

For nearly four hours they drove all over and in every direction, and while they saw and crossed many bridges, they never saw one with two exits.

Finally Paula was getting low on gas and time, as she needed to return home to check on her son. Kathy was getting low on energy and her eyes were heavy. like a small child in need of a nap. Outside, the skies were darkening as clouds were moving in.
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“Kitten”, Paula said softly. “I know you don’t want to stop anymore than I do, but I need to get home, and you need some sleep baby.”

Kathy’s eyes were tired and sad. “I just wanna find the bridge. I wanna go home Paula. I wanna go home.”

Paula sighed and tried to comfort her little sister. “I know baby. I know … and I want us both to find that bridge and go home, but I think we’ll have to look for it some more tomorrow, okay?”

Kathy slumped in her seat. “Okay, Paula.” She let out a heavy sigh.

The ride back toward Kathy’s house was quiet. Paula had to concentrate on driving, as a fog had rolled in. Beside her, Kathy could barely keep her eyes open.

By the time Paula was approaching the turn to Kathy’s street, the fog was so thick, she could barely see more than a few feet in front of her. She slowed down to a crawl as she made the turn, then slammed on the brakes when she suddenly she found herself at the entrance to a bridge that hadn’t been there when she’d picked Kathy up that afternoon.

The bridge was white, wooden and covered. Paula tried to see inside the bridge, but the fog was too thick. If she went forward, it would have to be on pure trust. Since the decision to go forward involved both girls’ destinies, Paula turned to wake Kathy.

Kathy, however, was sound asleep and Paula could not raise her. It was now up to her to decide. Go forward onto a bridge that should not even be there, that she could not see into, and could not be sure of where it would lead? She wanted to believe every word that Momma Rosa had said, but it all seemed too good to be true.

Paula thought for a moment and then shifted the transmission into drive. Everything she wanted and Kathy wanted could be on the other side of that bridge. She had to go for it. It was the only way home.

Paula slowly drove the car onto the bridge and once she did, all the lighting went out. She was totally in the dark. She could barely see Kathy sleeping. Now she was driving on pure faith, and all she could do was hope it would lead both her and Kathy to their dreams come true.

The car rolled slowly through the dark bridge for nearly two minutes which seemed like two hours to Paula. Then, finally, she saw a light, no … two lights in the distance. As Paula came closer to the end of the bridge it was obvious there were two exits on this bridge: one entrance but yet two exits. Her heart dared to hope what lie just ahead.

Paula finally stopped the car dead center between the two exits. She wasn’t sure what to do now. She looked through the windshield at each exit, but both were pure bright light, and she could not see beyond them. Again she tried to wake Kathy, but still she slept. Should she drive the car to the left exit or to the right? If she went to one, could she back up and then drive to the other?

Paula was faced with the biggest decision of her life, Her own life, and possibly Armando; or Kathy’s and Lauri’s lives if Momma Rosa was right. She had to choose right … or was it choose left? Not knowing what else to do, she closed her eyes and prayed for an angel to guide her.

A tapping on the passenger’s side glass alerted her that her angel had arrived. When she opened her eyes she was amazed to find she was no longer on the bridge, but parked in front of a lovely and familiar home, familiar like the face of the tapping angel, whose name was Lauri.

Paula leaned across the seat and unlocked the door. Lauri opened it with a smile.

“Hola Chica! Como esta?”

Paula smiled; she always liked it when Lauri spoke the little Spanish she knew.

She answered, “Bien … bien.”

Lauri looked down at the passenger seat. “So where’s my girl? I don’t mind if you sold her, just as long as I get half of what you got?”

Paula’s eyes went wide for a moment as she thought, “Her girl? … She means Kitten. But where is the Kitten? She was there when I closed my eyes.”

Then thoughts from a new reality started to filter in and she knew exactly where the Kitten was, and where she’d been since the drive to take her back home to Lauri.

“Home to Lauri”, she thought with a smile. Her heart was bursting with joy for her friend. She already knew what she’d find when she reached behind her and pulled the cover from the sleeping lump in the backseat.

Lauri laughed, “They always look like little angels when they’re sleeping, don’t they? It’s a shame they have to wake up and grow horns.”

Paula’s eyes misted as she saw the sleeping angel. Kathy, or now more aptly, Kitten, was now as she had always truly been in her heart: a little girl and Lauri’s daughter. She was curled up holding her favourite stuffy. Reddish blonde curls were a bit wild as one pig tail had come undone. Her eyes were closed but Paula knew those heartbreaking baby blues were there and waiting to open. She was wearing the same outfit that she’d been wearing when Paula had picked her up earlier today, but now it was as small as the little girl who wore it. One Mary Jane had slipped off during sleep and small white stocking toes wiggled as she snuggled under the blanket.

Lauri opened up the rear passenger door. “Hey, Sleeping Beauty! Time to get up.” She sang.

When there was no sign of movement, Lauri poked her in the ribs. “Hey Kitten! Pizza’s here!”

Kitten lifted her sleepy head and smiled at Lauri. “I want cheeeeeez.”

Lauri shook her head and laughed, “It works every time.”

Lauri unhooked her little one and grabbed Kitten’s Eeyore backpack with her free hand.

“Paula, thanks so much for taking her last night. With Erin and Samantha gone, and both of Jeff’s girls over at their mother’s, it was so nice to have a night alone.” Lauri smiled seductively, “You know what I mean.”

Paula giggled, as indeed she did.

Kitten was wobbling, still half asleep in the back seat and trying to find her foot with the shoe that had fallen off. Lauri rolled her eyes and sighed as she took the shoe from her daughter and put it on for her.

“Was she any trouble last night? Honestly just let me know. Jeff and I really enjoy beating the kids!”

Paula laughed again. That was one of those things she loved most about Lauri. She had this wonderful offbeat sense of humour. Lauri was a wonderful loving mother, however she always loved to joke about being anything but that.

More memories came flooding back to Paula and she was able to answer the question honestly. “No she was a good girl. She helped me with Darian and played with him and … Kenya loves her. They had so much fun together. They were like sisters. She coloured a lot and watched television and she ate very good. Oh … and she’s trying very hard to learn Spanish. Kenya had her counting to five, almost ten.”

Lauri smiled. “Oh, she smart alright. She’s got Jeff wrapped around her little finger, and she knows how to work those eyes and that smile. I can’t imagine where she learned those things.” Lauri batted her big eyes and smiled sweetly to show Kitten had gotten those things from her Momma.

Lauri finally got Kitten to the edge of the backseat. “C’mon let’s go. I’m not carrying you in. You can walk. You don’t have your leg chains on … yet.”

Kitten put both feet down and wobbled a bit. She was barely more than sleepwalking, and her knee buckled on the first step she took. Lauri snatched up the lightweight easily and placed her on her hip.

“Okay you little faker. I’ll carry you in, but this is going to cost you. You only get half a portion of kitten chow for dinner, and two beatings tonight instead of one.”

Paula rolled her eyes and scolded her best friend, “Lauri! You are so bad!”

Lauri smiled devilishly. “Yes I know, but I’m so good at it. And the kids don’t say anything. They know if they do I’ll lock them in their cages and beat them in places that bruises don’t show. They only WISH I’d sell them some time.”

“No … it’s not true Lauri and you know it.” Paula said as she smiled knowingly

Kitten laid her head on her mommy’s shoulder and cuddled, which made Lauri sigh and roll her eyes. “Yeah I know, but a girl’s gotta dream right?”

“Mommy?” came a sleepy little Kitten voice.

“She ran away.” Lauri quipped.

Kitten shook her head and smiled. “You’re Mommy. I love you. Am I home?”

“Yes my Kitten. You’re home. We tried to talk Paula into keeping, you but your father and I couldn’t raise enough money to pay her, so she brought you back.”

Kitten smiled and hugged her Mommy tighter.

Lauri shook her head. “I really need to quit hitting her in the head. I think it’s starting to do serious damage.”

“Lauri!” Paula scolded her playfully again.

Lauri winked and then prompted her daughter. “Tell Paula thank you for having you over?”

Kitten opened those big baby blues of hers and smiled. “Thank you Paula. Tank you for everything.”

“Oh you are welcome, my little Kitten. You can come visit any time.”

“Really Paula”, Lauri said seriously. “Thanks so much for taking her last night, and you let me know when you want me to take Kenya and Darian, okay? I’m sure you can use a little alone time with hubby yourself.”

Paula blushed. “Oh yeah ...”

“See you at work on Monday” Lauri said as she closed the door with her free hand.

“Bye Lauri, bye Kitten”, Paula said as she waved.

Lauri waved and so did Kitten. The little one’s smile seemed to be bigger than she was.

Paula watched them head to the house where Jeff stood in the door waiting. She sat in the car until all three had disappeared into the house. She could barely believe what had happened, but in her heart and in head she knew it was true. Somehow reality had changed, and a new one had taken its place.

In this new one Paula still worked at the factory, but Kathy had never worked there. How could she? She was only five years old. Lauri and Jeff were married and had been for nearly as long as Kitten had been alive. Yes, Paula had lost one sister, but she’d gained a sister in Lauri and best of all, a very happy niece in Kitten.

Tears of joy fell from Paula’s face. Kathy had found her exit off the bridge and it was everything she’d ever dreamed of and Paula was so happy, but what about the second exit? She was no longer on the bridge. How did she find her exit? How could she reach her dream come true?

“Calm yourself, Paula”, she said as she took a deep breath.

She had been on the bridge and then she closed her eyes and … and then when she opened them she was here … here at what had to be Kathy’s exit. If she closed her eyes again, would she be back on the bridge or at her exit? Paula looked around Kitten’s new world and thought that even if she didn’t find her exit, she was already in a good place. She had a job, she had friends, she had her children and she had a husband.

“A husband!” Yes, Lauri had said she would be willing to take her kids so she could have some alone time with her husband, but … who was her husband? She could not remember. Was it Fernando? She hoped not or was it someone new or … or could it be Armando? She did not know. She could remember everything else in this new world, but not the name or face of her husband.

Knowing there was nothing she could do but what she had done before, she closed her eyes and hoped she would find her way to her gate just as Kathy had.

Paula closed her eyes and suddenly she relaxed. Sleep was calling her, and she answered.

“Paula are you awake?” came a voice in the darkness.

Paula opened one eye and found herself no longer in the car, but lying down on a soft mattress. She tried to see clearly but the room was dark. She felt a cold chill and snuggled for the warmth she found in the strong arms of the man that voice belonged to.

“You can sleep a little longer if you want. We don’t have to worry about the kids.”

“The kids!” she cried as she bolted upright.

A loving but firm hand caressed her bare shoulder. “The kids are at Lauri and Jeff’s. Remember? We took Kitten last Saturday, and they took Kenya and Darian this Saturday so we could have a night alone? And oh my love, what a night we had.”

Paula sighed dreamily as memories of last night; the NEW last night came flooding back. After dropping the kids off at Lauri’s she came home to find rose petals greeting her at the front door. She’d followed them to the bedroom which was lit with candles and there in the centre of the bed, smiling, ready and waiting for his wife was … was … YES! Armando! Armando!

She shouted his name. “Armando it’s you!”

The very handsome, older but still young at heart hubby smiled at her. “Yes …it’s me. Where you expecting Antonio Banderas?”

She took his face in her hands, feeling the stubble of his unshaven face and bringing her mouth close to his. She whispered, “Oh no, my love, I only have eyes and lips for you.”

She kissed him as passion stirred within her and ROSE from Armando (Giggle).

Gently she led him and he followed willingly. He lay back on the bed and she hovered over him, preparing to do her best version of Mujeres Arriba (Woman on Top).

She smiled seductively at him. “If you think we had a great night, then oh, are you ever going to love this morning.”

With those words the two became one and all was as it should be.

Hugs and love from the Kitten.

Edited by Holly H Hart