© 2005 by Maggie O'Malley

Maggie rolled her bike up onto the porch and smiled as she reached for her door key. It was a good day! Any time she got a half-day off from being the evil meter maid was definitely a good day. Just knowing that she would have one afternoon without suffering through the bad weather, her bad knee, and very bad motorists, made this afternoon special. What she had waiting for her inside the house made it pure magic.

Maggie walked into the quiet house, tossed her keys on the end table and then headed to the kitchen for the magic that awaited her. She smiled as she saw the brownie mix, pan and measuring cup sitting in the center of the kitchen table. To any one else who saw those items, they would be little more than ingredients for German Chocolate oooey gooey brownies, but to Maggie they represented so much more. Not only were they the makings for a tasty treat, but also they were also love and magic sent to her by her Aunt Jenna.

In what most people would recognize as the so-called "real world", the woman that Maggie called her Aunt Jenna, wasn't really her aunt at all. In fact, there would be a lot of people who might even question Aunt Jenna and Maggie's right to be called women. In the "real world", Jenna and Maggie were both thirty-some year old male to female transsexuals, or in simple terms, they both had a female soul that had been born trapped in a male body. In reality, they both were in various stages of physically transitioning into a woman's world with the hope of claiming some small part of the life that had been denied by their birth defect. While they both were desperately trying to find the courage to become the best women they could be, they were also trying to learn to accept the parts of womanhood they would never know.

For Jenna, it was being a mother or an aunt. She had so much love to give to her children, yet because of her birth defect she would never know the joy of carrying a child, holding her little one in her arms, or watching one grow up.

For Maggie, it was being a little girl and having a mother and an aunt. She had lots of love to give, too, and she wanted to give it in hugs and kisses to her whole Chatroom family. She wanted to be held and cuddled and tucked in each night. She wanted to giggle and play and doing all the things little girls dream of doing.

In the "real world" neither of their dreams could ever be realized, but fortunately for them, they’d found another world to live in, a magical place that allowed them to have the body and the life they had always dreamed of. This magical reality was known as the Chatroom, and within its confines Jenna was the beautiful young mother of a strawberry blonde three year old named Cathleen.

Cathleen was yet another tortured soul trapped in the wrong body, the wrong age, and in a lonely mommy-less reality, but in the Chatroom, she was the "toddler terrific", a playful little imp who loved her mommy dearly, and hated bath time with a passion.

The Chatroom worked its magic for Maggie too, and whenever she stepped in, she became Maggie the Kitten, a freckled faced five year old with soft auburn curls and big green eyes. She was a hug monster, a cookie monster and along with Cathleen, a twin toddler tickle monster that ran about the Chatroom playfully attacking the adults. Best of all, she was a very lucky little girl who had a mommy, big sisters, a cousin, uncles and several aunts, one of them being her Aunt Jenna.

This other reality called the Chatroom was sadly confined to the limits of the internet. Maggie did not have home internet access, so she could only "play" in the Chatroom when she could get to the library or the university to use their computers. In order to do this, she had to steal time from her meter maid route, so her visits to the other reality and her time as the little girl, were always short lived, but nonetheless, still pure magic. Aunt Jenna and the rest of her family would always try to be in the Chatroom whenever Maggie got a chance to visit. They always made sure the little girl got lots of cuddles and play time before she sadly had to return to the other reality. She always left wishing somehow she could take some part of the Chatroom magic with her into the "real world".

About a month ago, her Aunt Jenna sent her a surprise package in the mail, not e-mail, but a "real" package in the "real" snail mail. When Maggie opened it, she could hardly believe her eyes. One of her wishes had finally come true, as the package was full of Chatroom magic! Aunt Jenna had sent her soap, and lotions and lots of smell pretty. She had even sent her a beautiful stuffed baby, a cute white kitty with black legs and paws that Maggie appropriately named Boots. Also included in this care package were brownie mix, a measuring cup and a magic cake pan that Aunt Jenna promised would make perfect brownies for her little niece.

The adult transsexual Maggie reached across the kitchen table and ran her fingers across the cool metal baking pan, and immediately the magic began to do its work. She sighed, and smiled and suddenly started getting very excited at the prospect of making brownies, and especially eating them. The little girl that had only been allowed to come out and play in the confines of the chatroom, began to assert herself as the adult Maggie began to get the rest of the ingredients together.

By the time Maggie began mixing and pouring, everything around her seemed a little bigger, and everything she did seemed a lot more fun! The adult knew that sadly she was still the six foot tall, 37 year old TS, who was mixing brownies, but she was also giving way to the three foot tall, five year old little girl, who was having fun making "brown- ees".

Maggie measured, and poured and mixed and sampled and then sampled some more as she poured the sweet brown batter into the magic pan. The adult was just a bit nervous, as her cooking expertise had never gpne much beyond nuking microwave burritos and warming up left over pizza, but the little girl was totally confident. She was using Aunt Jenna's magic baking pan. Aunt Jenna had promised her that even a toddler could do this, as the magic baking pan made perfect brownies every time.

Maggie placed the brownies in the oven. Maggie the adult set the timer for thirty minutes, but Maggie the little girl didn't need a timer, with the patience of most toddlers, she would be peeking in the oven every five minutes!

Over the next thirty minutes both the little girl and the adult checked the brownies, used their fingers to wipe out the last of the batter from the mixing bowl, and licked their lips as the smell of baking brownies drifted through the house.

Thirty minutes later the timer went off and Maggie pulled the hot pan of brownies out. Taking a toothpick she stuck it in the chocolate delight and then pulled it out. Looking at the tiny stick, she shrugged her shoulders. There was a bit of brownie on it, but she really had no idea if the brownies were undercooked, or over cooked. The adult sighed and bit her lip. The little girl smiled at the silly adult and told her not to worry. The brownies had to be perfect cause they were made in Aunt Jenna's magic baking pan.

Maggie paced about the kitchen for a few minutes, wiping down the table and washing the mixing bowl. Finally she could wait no longer. She took a spatula and cut into the still hot pan of brownies. She smiled as she cleanly pulled up a square from the pan. The fact they didn't stick, or run all over the spatula was a good sign. When she took a bite and her face lit up in pure chocolate bliss, she knew the pan was truly magic.

The adult was relieved and at that point, and rewarded the child by giving her full reign. The little girl poured herself a glass of ice- cold milk and sat at the table, swinging her feet and savoring the delicious delight that she had made. With the five year old totally in charge, it didn't matter if she got a little ooooey goooey on her hands, her face or even her clothes. As she finished the brownie, she licked her fingertips and sported a milk moustache.

She was so happy! She had done good, really good and the only thing that could have made this moment any better would have been for her Aunt Jenna to be there and for Cathleen to be there helping her eat the brownies.

She looked over at the tray of brownies cooling atop the stove and then got a little girl gleam in her eyes and a big smile on her face. Maggie decided she would run to the library later in the afternoon and tell Aunt Jenna about how much fun she had making the brownies and how well they turned out. She knew that would make her Aunt almost as happy as if she could have been there.

Maggie got up from her chair and went over to the stove. Using the spatula, she cut out another large slice of hot brownie and dropped it on her plate. As she poured herself another glass of milk she thought of Cathleen. Since Cathleen couldn't be there herself, Maggie was going to eat another brownie just for her!

Of course the adult would have known that Maggie couldn't truly eat a brownie for another person, but the little girl was running the show, and eating a brownie for Cathleen was perfect five year old toddler logic.

The little girl polished off the second brownie and glass of milk. Finally pulling back from the table, she left the kitchen and headed toward her bedroom to stretch out for a while. Her belly was full of warm brownie and when she plopped down on her soft bed, sleep began to call to her.

She checked her alarm clock and smiled. It was almost three o'clock. This was about the time that on a normal workday, she would be playing in the chatroom. She usually took her short lunch break around then, and when her time ran out she would tell Aunt Jenna she was getting "seepy" and start yawning. Aunt Jenna knew that meant Maggie's lunch was over and she would take the sleepy little girl in one arm, and Cathleen in the other, and carry them off for their afternoon naps. She always made sure they had their stuffed babies, and then would give them each a kiss and tuck them in. Most times she would stay with them until they were asleep.

Maggie reached over and grabbed her stuffed babies and cuddled them tightly. She was so tired, and so happy she was getting a real nap, but the little girl wanted her cousin Cathleen to share the bed with her, and her Aunt Jenna to tuck her in. The adult, in the shadows but still there, desperately wanted the little girl to have all those things too.

The little girl clutched her stuffed babies, and called out, "Cathleen...Aunt Jenna...Mommy?" When there was no answer, the little girl cried and rocked. She didn't like being all alone. It was too scary. She wanted Cathleen to be with her, and for Aunt Jenna to hold her.

The adult, sighed and tried to comfort the frightened child as she did nearly every lonely night the little girl went to bed crying for her mommy, her family and her life.

The adult told the little girl to think about the magic baking pan and how she had made those delicious brownies all by herself, and how proud her Aunt Jenna would be when she told her.

The little girl wiped her eyes and sniffled back a tear as she thought about the magic baking pan and how she could tell Aunt Jenna and Cathleen all about how much fun she had. Suddenly a broad smile filled the child's face as toddler logic took over again. The little girl couldn't believe she hadn't thought of it before. It was as plain as the freckles on her face.

Since Aunt Jenna had given her a "magic" baking pan, then that meant it just had to make "magic" brownies, and magic brownies is the bestest kind of all!

The little girl sat up in bed, laid her babies by her side, and then placed her hands together in prayer. Closing her eyes she spoke out loud. "Oh please, please magic brownies give me one wish. I eated two of them, but I only needs one wish. Please let me take my nap and when I wakes up I want to be a real liddle girl, wiff my cousin Cathleen in bed wiff me, and my Aunt Jenna baby-sitting me cause Mommy will still be at work. Oh please magic brownies, please give me my wish!"

The little girl then took her babies and cuddled with them as she curled up on the bed. Sleep overtook both the little girl and the adult almost immediately.

Two hours later, Maggie slowly awakened. Her eyes were still closed as she clutched her babies tightly. For once, her right knee didn't ache, and she stretched out her leg without fear of cramps. Suddenly her foot hit something solid and she heard a moan. Opening her eyes, she was greeted by the sleepy face of a strawberry blonde toddler. The little girl frowned at her sleeping companion. "Owww Maggie you kicked me."

Maggie quickly apologized. "I is sorry Cathleen. I didn't means to."

Cathleen reached over and hugged her cousin and bestest playmate. "Dat otay Maggie, I not hurted."

When Maggie released the embrace she rubbed sleep from her eyes and took a closer look at the little girl next to her. The pig-tailed blonde was dressed in a pair of pink pajamas with little ballerinas on them. The three-year-old's green eyes sparkled as she smiled.

Maggie took a deep breath and then turned her to attentions to her own body. A wisp of a soft auburn curl tickled her nose and she brushed it aside. She stretched her arms and legs out before her and found she was wearing a pair of light blue pajamas with kitten's chasing butterflies on them. She wiggled her fingers and bare toes and knew they belonged to a five-year-old little girl.

Cathleen tugged on the soft cotton material of Maggie's jammies. "Maggie you tinks nap time is ober yet?"

Maggie scrunched up her freckled nose and thought for a moment. "Is you tired no more Cathleen?"

The tiny toddler shook her head back and forth. Maggie smiled proudly. "Me neiders, so I tinks nap time is ober, otay?"

Cathleen smiled brightly and bounced on the bed. Maggie thought that was a pretty good idea and took a few bounces herself before rolling onto her belly and easing her feet down toward the floor below her. Once the little girl hit the carpet and steadied herself, she helped her smaller cousin escape the clutches of Cathleen's canopy bed.

Maggie then reached back up on the bed, and pulled down two of the girl's favorite play and sleep companions. She handed Cathleen her precious bear Bernadette, as she tucked her own special stuffed baby, Boots, beneath her arm.

The two girls were looking around the toy filled room when suddenly their green eyes grew wide, and their smiles wider as a sweet smell reached their little noses. The twin toddlers looked at each other and squealed simultaneously, "BROWN-EES!"

Knowing Aunt Jenna was making brownie magic in her kitchen again, Maggie grabbed Cathleen's hand and the two hug monsters ran giggling toward the kitchen, ready to attack the young mother and the left over brownie batter that she always saved just for them.

The spirit of the adult Maggie smiled as she watched the pair scurry away. She looked toward the heavens and spoke her last words before relinquishing the rest of this life to the child. "Bless you Brownie Magic."

P.S. After finishing this tale, I knew I needed to add one more dedication. I would also like to dedicate this to my cousin and play mate Becky, because nobody loved brownies more than she did, especially magic ones.

Huggles all!