The Poise that Josey Found 5 In Pursuit of Finding Herself

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The Poise that Josey Found 5
In Pursuit of Finding Herself


By Jessica C


Joy's poise.jpg

Joey’s discipline problems…
Become Joey learning to dance on his toes…
The boy’s prize of a pink tutu…
Josey has become an accomplished ballerina…
The Mother/Daughter Night Out…
Wearing the Pink Tutu…
=^_^=


This is based on Maryanne Peter's vignette Finding Poise.

Josey woke in the morning at 5:30, got dressed, and went down to the lobby. Hanna a dancer of the New York City Dancers befriended Josey. “Didn’t I see you come over to us after the performance?”

“Yes, but you were busy with important people,” Josey said. “I loved your dancing. I’m sixteen and only now learning ballet. I’m from White Plains, New York.”

Hanna asked, “Did I meet another dancer last night from White Plains?”

Josey said, “That must have been Megan Sharp; she’s a co-dancer and one of my teachers.”

Hanna asked, “Can we go into their restaurant for breakfast?” Josey tried excusing herself because she planned to eat with her Mom. “Then let’s talk over coffee or tea.” They talked and two others from the dancing troupe joined them.

Josey’s phone rang, it was her Mom and she was delighted for Josey, “Would the group mind if I came down and we could have breakfast together.” It was a group of five, and the breakfast was a good time of give and take with a joyful spirit.

Hanna and Danielle both invited Josey to meet with them where they’d be on and off Broadway.

Hanna talked to Jennifer, “We understand she’s trans or however she sees herself. Her friend Megan spoke well of her recent progress. That you support her she’s especially someone we want to follow.”

When Jennifer said, she wasn’t sure that Josey would continue as a girl. She was challenged, “You mean Joey is her stronger persona?” Jennifer knew better but was waiting to hear Dr. Helene Miller’s thoughts on Tuesday.

They were back at the Camp by 11:30; the ballet dancers planned to dance outside from seven to ten that evening. Josey had peach tights and a matching top; it caused many to take a second look to know she wasn’t nude. She’d put on a tutu to make it more obvious.

She was outside giving Mysti, her dog, needed affection and exercise. Her mother came out to check on Mysti and affirm the presence of her daughter Josey. Josey was showing differences from Joey; caring more about others than herself. Her affection and attention to Mysti also revealed a personality difference. Josey now had a sense of play. She was very playful with Mysti, without getting rough.

Come three o’clock Josey, Mysti, and Jennifer ran out of energy. Mysti slept next to Josey, and Jennifer borrowed Megan’s bed. They were refreshed for dinner. Mysti’s cardboard castle was ready for her.

Jennifer had woken earlier to be in conversation with Beth. Dinner was a simple cookout, but chicken instead of hotdogs, early corn on the cob instead of baked beans, and bowls of fruit and yogurt.

Guys from Keene State University were thereby 7:30, but Josey was happy with Michael and her dancing peers. She found Michael and the guys more interesting than she had. Michael was three years older and that was enough and he was known by her.

Beth Walters and camp security kept watch and soon encouraged the few Keens State guys to head back.

The Fourth was the next day, and a festive atmosphere around the community was exciting. Twelve dancers including Josey danced as part of the community festivities. Short skirts were worn instead of tutus. They entertained small crowds of people and helped over two dozen from the community to experience and learn firsthand about dancing. There were two boys, who were encouraged to participate; one was excited to get Megan and Josey’s attention. Sadly, he explained, “My father thinks this kind of dancing weakens boys.”

Josey explained, “It takes much time to see how much boys and men have to contribute. One of our group had to pretend to be a girl first before he was encouraged to dance.

There was a good break from their little dance clinic, to refresh and be ready for the local fireworks, come dark. Many like Charlie, sought the dance community before the fireworks began. Charlie the eleven-year-old boy sought to be with Josey. And as the fireworks continued she leaned back against her. He was embarrassed when others pointed out what he did. Megan helped turn it around. “She appreciated Charlie being willing to dance. He lucked out getting the attention of a good-looking girl.”

“Charlie ten is a good age for a boy to start dance,” said Josey. “You should ask your parents to speak to Beth Walters. This is her dance school camp. This might be your opportunity to begin dancing. If your father sees this as an opportunity, without making it a final decision it just might work.”

A girl standing nearby, said, “Charlie, Dad might just accept it. Dad smiled when he saw you with Josey.” Marie looked to Josey, “You just need to know how most men think.”

“I agree, it might help,” Josey said.

=^_^=


All the dancers were looking forward to getting back to dance camp activity. Mom called Josey, “Were you good at caring for Mysti?”

“Yes, I was with her no less than four times after this morning. Mom, you will need to make your decision without my help. I want her.” Josey considered her Mom’s silence on the other end, “And no it’s not a question of Josey or Mysti. I want both.”

Mom said, “You have hutzpah, where did that come from?

“I’m just guessing about hutzpah, but yes, I think I do. Josey has things that never surface with Joey.”

Mom said, “Remember, tomorrow you have a face-to-face with Dr. Helene my doctor.” Josey thanked her Mom for the reminder. Their conversation soon ended.

With a good night’s sleep, Josey was excited for a full day of dance camp. She was refreshed and Mysti helped to wake her up. When she got to the cafeteria she found a bag of puppy chow and a leash and collar for Mysti. It was her Mom saying they were keeping the pup. Josey's crying was a clear sign she was a teenage girl. Her Mom was soon behind her saying, “I want you to know I support you in whatever that will be.”

Josey kept crying with the only chance she was crying in her mother’s arms saying these are happy tears. I’ll get past them.”

Megan moved over telling Jennifer, “Sit here Mrs. Anders.”

Josey ate cream of rice with almond butter, and goji berries for breakfast; it was a rare opportunity to have the goji berries as they were cost-prohibitive. Someone ordered enough for breakfast. Josey, afraid of what Dr. Helene Miller would say, took two of the green pills which she usually gets once per week. She then hurried back to her cabin room to give Mysti her gifts and to take her for a good walk and some play.

Mysti was a bundle of energy as her new collar and the puppy chow was fed to her. Returned to her puppy castle; she’d stay there until lunch recess.

Today, Coach Anna was working with Josey’s group; she worked them hard and had them coming on their stage from the left and right and moving between the other dancers. It took four times before the girls learned to be conscious of others and know their roles within the dance sequence. Then each time another twist was added. It added to Josey’s excitement as she completed the added steps. She had completed seven steps on her toes, and Megan applauded her achievement. Anna was critical of Megan, “Don’t compliment her for doing what she was asked. I don’t want her to lose her concentration.”

It was when they broke for lunch that Coach Anna Roche called Josey to her and complimented her morning routine. “You did very well Josey; my criticism of Megan was because she lost sight that she was a coach at the time. I expect you to do what is asked of a student. I know this was an achievement for you but now, not then is the appropriate time to compliment you. If I seem to forget, you are to do such things without compliments. More is still expected of you.”

“I know you have a doctor’s visit coming up, but it cuts into the workout. I hope those things can be avoided in the future. There are allowances given to ballerinas in America than I am used to. I hope you will not be too emotional to return to practice after it's over. Beth Walters told me it might be. I understand, but I am expecting more out of you.”

Josey steps forward, gives Anna and unexpected hug, “Thank you for your compliment and I will try to return, but my doctor’s visit isn’t until 4 p.m.”

“Ms. Walters said you will need the beginning of the afternoon session to dress properly and it might be a video call. Did she tell you that she put the Pink Tutu you’ve worked for will be in your cabin room after a shower and lunch?”

Josey hadn’t expected the pink tutu to be given to her yet. She went to her room, the tutu was not there yet, but Mysti was and she needed to be outside. Mysti and Josey were bubbling over with glee, once outside. Josey hoped Mysti was already hers. Megan gave her a walk while Josey cleaned up her boxes. When Josey appeared back outside Megan let Mysti’s leash go and Mysti was running to her, but as a puppy, she wasn’t fully obedient. “Megan, we can’t be too lax with her. I would hate to lose her to an accident.”

Josey gave Mysti some fresh water and a scoop of puppy chow. She ran some more and then was put back inside.

Josey freshened up but went to the cafeteria before showering. Aunt Beth and her Mom congratulated her on the steps she took on her toes. Aunt Beth asked, “So what was the trick to achieving that?”

“There’s no trick; you and the dance camp brought me along. I didn’t expect to do it already.”

“Neither did we; you responded better to Anna’s coaching and Megan’s help than anyone had the right to imagine!” said Beth. Our applause was earned by Anna and Megan as well.”

Josey jokes, “But I’m not sharing the pink tutu.” There was laughter throughout the cafeteria.

As lunchtime was winding down, it was announced, that Strawberry shortcake would be served for the evening dessert.

=^_^=


When Josey went to take her shower the tutu was still not there. The shower was good, and smelling clean was now treasured by Josey. She wore a robe back to her room finished drying off, and combing out her damp hair. She lay down and dreamed that she was a real girl. Megan came in and broke her out of her dream. Megan said, “We have dreams like you were having.” Megan sat on her bed across from Josey. “Were you dreaming just of yourself, or was someone else in your dream?”

Josey, “You surprised me, whatever I was dreaming was gone.”

Megan says, “You can trust me were you alone or was someone part of your dream?” Josey seemed dazed. “If you knew the person, is was probably romantic; if not you were trying to think or feel like a woman. Either serves their purpose. Ms. Beth had me bring your pink tutu. You should try it on to see how it looks.”

Josey was quick to her feet, and Megan brought it from around her back; “It’s a nice tutu; what makes it special to you?”

Josey quickly put on a pair of white tights. Then she eases her way into the panty with the tutu, gets her arms into the sleeves, and pulls the tutu up snuggling her body. She pulled the zipper up until Megan could help her. Josey likes how she fills out the tutu.

Once in the pink tutu and it is properly fitting she turns to the mirror, “Oh my!” There’s a big pause, but no sign from Josey of how she likes it. “It’s my dream come true, can you believe that? What do you think Megan?” Even without the distraction of the tutu skirt, Josey would be smooth.

Megan wants to hug Josey, “It is beautiful Josey.”

Josey asked, “Do I dare keep it on to practice dancing this afternoon?”

Megan said, “I’m sure it would be fun to get a video, of a short dance, but wouldn’t it be better to be safer to wait?” Cyndi and Jessie come to see the pink tutu that was spoken of. Most of the girls had been dancing for years and already had a special tutu or two. Cynthia spoke, “That is the prize tutu I’ve seen Ms. Walters show before. It’s nice to see it on someone. It is beautiful on you, Josey!”

Mysti barks from her box, wanting Josey's attention to pick her up.

Josey’s phone rings, she answers and it is her Mom, “Josey, you need to come up to the main hall; Dr. Hanna has called early. Come immediately as you are…”

To Be Continued…

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