Brandy and I were sitting on the swings watching Emily get carted away.

I sighed. “I sure hope I don’t freak out like that. God knows where they’ve sent her.”

Zipping past me a couple of times on the swing before saying anything, Brandy shrugged. “I really don’t think we will. We were both adults when we switched and I’m fairly positive neither of us was pregnant so I think we’ll coast through adjusting to being ten year olds.”

I dragged my feet in the dirt to bring my swing to a stop. “But it’s nothing for you. You’ve already done all this. Becoming a woman, getting married and having kids is old hat to you. That whole idea terrifies me.”

Brandy laughed. “You only have to do one of those. Becoming a woman is required for you as a little girl, but getting married and having babies is optional. Honestly, Chrystal. You need to chill out. If these things happen, then they happen. When I first got married, neither of us was looking at starting a family any time soon. But then, all my married friends started having babies and guess who caught baby-fever? So suddenly we were fucking like bunnies to try to get me pregnant.” She paused to laugh. Looking suddenly thoughtful, Brandy said, “You know, despite you saying all this about not wanting to date boys and stuff… I’ll bet you get a boyfriend before I do!”

I rolled my eyes at her and laughed. “If I had any money, I’d take that bet!”

Brandy stopped her swing and gave me a cold stare. “Use your Barbie as collateral.”

I returned her cold stare and simply said, “No.”

Brandy laughed.

As I climbed up into the car, Mom turned and smiled at me. “So, pumpkin. How was your second whole day of school?”

Looking out the windshield, I shrugged and said, “I’m a little bummed out about Emily.”

Narrowing her eyes at me, Mom just asked, “Oh? What happened?”

I looked over at Mom and said, “They carted her off in leg irons!”

Shaking her head at me, she said, “I doubt that. So what happened?”

I folded my arms. “Well, they had her strapped down. She freaked out about having her baby taken away.”

Mom nodded. “I can understand that. I’m sure that’s hard on her. It would be on me. Was that all the excitement today?”

I gave Mom a funny look. “Isn’t that enough? But also, it’s happening. Who I used to be is already starting to slip through my fingers. Math is starting to get hard. I couldn’t reduce twenty-one sevenths. Give me a break!”

Mom sighed. “We both feared that would happen.”

We drove on in silence. I turned to Mom and asked, “Can we get ice cream?”

“Honey. It’s past time for bed,” said Mom as she poked her head in the door. With a curious expression she took a couple steps towards me. I was sitting in front of my computer at my desk. Instead of a game, I had a word processor up.

“What are you up to?” she asked as she got closer.

I stopped typing and turned to face her. I was hoping I could retain my typing skills by, well, typing. To Mom, I said. “I’m doing a journal, Mommy. Not just of the stuff I did today, but jotting down memories before they dissolve. My math skills and vocabulary is already starting to slip.”

Probably inspired by the government newsletter I’m not supposed to be aware of, Mom asked, “Are you sure you want to keep those old memories around? You hated being that old man. Every day you grumbled about how 40 years of your life was stolen and all your aches and pains. And… and even before the switch, you weren’t doing anything with your life. A part-time job as a sacker and a full-time gamer. I’d think you’d want to embrace your new life instead with all its new adventures.”

I frowned at Mom. “It might not have been perfect, but it was all still my life! I had a comp-sci degree! I couldn’t help it if the job market here sucked. I dated a few girls. I don’t want to forget all that. And I need to warn my ten year old self about future pit-falls I’m going to face. Shit like puberty. I am not looking forward to going through puberty again… especially as a girl!”

Looking uncomfortable, Mom sat on my bed near me. “Yes sweetie. Growing up can suck. I know some of it was bad enough once. One thing I’m not going to allow to happen to you this time is your face becoming a pimple farm. And yes. You’ll soon start your period. It’s not fun, but it’s part of becoming a woman. You’re going to have plenty of new experiences and memories in your new life. Don’t cling to the old.”

Scowling at Dede, I said, “Really? Forget Mom and Dad? Now that they’re gone, I treasure those memories of camping trips, vacations to amusement parks and Dad taking me to motocross races and tractor pulls. Those times are gone forever. I don’t want to forget them.”

Looking down at her hands, Dede said, “We can still do some of those things, though I know it won’t be the same. And don’t be surprised if, as a girl, you find new things to be interesting. Oliver has told me he’d be happy to take you on weekend outings. He knows it’s tough not to have a father figure around.”

I snorted a laugh. “Your boyfriend is hardly a replacement for Dad.”

“Oliver will become ever more present in my life and so will grow in your life was well,” said Dede looking back up at me. “He knows he can’t substitute for our Dad. He isn’t even aware that my Dad is also your dad. I told him your dad abandoned you when you were born.”

My eyes went wide. “Lies! Are you suggesting you gave birth to me as well?”

Dede’s eyes flashed for a moment. “I can’t tell him you’re my twenty-something brother. I want to start over with you. I don’t want to relive our mistakes. And if we get married, Oliver will be your father. He hopes you can accept him.”

I shook my head. “It’ll never be the same. Remember when Dad took me to Boy’s Town in Tijuana on my sixteenth birthday? Would he do anything like that?”

“Of course not!” barked Dede. “Mom was furious. But as a girl, you’re not going to want that anyway.”

I slipped off my chair and stood. “The point is, I don’t want to forget who I was…who I AM. I’m the total of all those experiences.”

Mom reached out and took me in her arms. “I know, honey. I know. We’ll try to keep those memories alive, but you need to build a new life. One that’s uniquely Chrystal. Don’t forget the importance of being Chrystal.”