CHAPTER 31
My head felt a little off-kilter when I woke up, Alys still snoring away beside me. It was raining outside, of course. I sat up in my bag just as Dad put his head round the dormitory’s door, making the universal gesture that meant ‘Want a cuppa?’, and I nodded in reply, a little gingerly. That would be a hangover, then…

Just over eighteen months as one of Mrs Preece’s ‘young adults’, both of us were now legally past that birthday, and finally, finally, a certain clinic and its doctors had given Alys two separate letters confirming her status. So often, I had heard the phrase ‘roller-coaster ride’, and what I felt now was the end of the run-in, where everything slows to a crawl so you can get off the car.

I looked down at her, mouth open in sleep, and realised that we wouldn’t actually be climbing off the ride, but going round again, especially seeing the way the hormones had affected her moods when she had started on HRT a year before.

Personal needs… I unzipped my bag, trying to keep the noise of the zip as quiet as possible, and started to slip out of it, still in knickers and T-shirt, but grabbing my fleece and Ron Hills as I rose. Sali stirred as I passed her, and I repeated the gesture Dad had made, pointing towards the common room.

Liquid out, much nicer stuff waiting in a mug when I settled onto one of the bench seats by the huge dining table.

“Thanks, Dad! Need this, I do”

He smiled fondly at me.

“Fragile?”

“A little. Trying to keep up with Alys. She was a woman on a mission last night!”

Still that fond smile.

“Well, she would be. Huge thing for her, that birthday. And the doctors’ letters, of course”

“Dad?”

“Yes, love?”

“Thank you”

“What for?”

“Letting us use this place. Bringing so many of our friends over. Being…”

I found myself crying, for some reason.

“Being the sort of father I needed. Sorry; bit overwhelmed at all this”

He shuffled over to hug me, as Sali came into the room in pyjamas and dressing gown. She came across to hug both of us, then stepped away, smiling.

“I’ll stir the others, then come back for a tea and we can get breakfast started. That the oven on already?”

Dad nodded.

“Yup; sausages are browning, and I set a pot of beans and one of toms on low heat. Big pot of porridge just about ready. Good night last night?”

Sali snorted.

“So much bloody snogging, I didn’t know where to look!”

I sat up a little straighter.

“We have had to be more than a little hidden away, girl. Safe now, so what did you expect?”

Sali was shaking her head, holding up a hand in denial.

“Not you two, Enfys! That woman with the flute and her man, oh dear!”

I pointed past her towards the door.

“That woman with the flute…”

Sali turned quickly, as I paused for effect.

“… is not standing behind you”

“Oh, you sod, Hiatt!”

I grinned, and went over to the stove, giving the two massive pots a stir as Sali went to wake the rest, and as the door closed, I was setting out rashers of bacon on the grill pan. It had indeed been a hell of a night, after an amazing year. So many highlights, including our third Shrewsbury trip, still just the two of us, after a Summer touring Scotland for more castle twitching and ‘random’ meetings with Steph’n’Geoff in a number of climbing areas, which had included an incredible ridge traverse on the Aonach Eagach overlooking Glencoe, as well as a technically easy but engrossing ascent of Tower Ridge on Ben Nevis.

The Woodruffs had wanted to do an even longer ridge on Skye, but the weather had been almost as bad as the midges, so we had agreed to abandon that idea. What I had picked up were some really valuable pointers on ‘big mountain’ climbing, in situations where the descent could be almost as prolonged and difficult as the route itself, with a much greater need for survival equipment. I had found my viewpoint changing steadily, especially when Steph had pointed out the extra risks that winter would bring. The first lesson I picked up was simply that I had so, so much to learn.

The other big set of lessons, in riding a motorbike, were due to start in a week’s time. My parents had been very, very insistent that I wasn’t to be allowed anywhere near a steering wheel until I understood what bikers needed. I actually found that idea far more worrying than I had the narrower bits of that ridge over Glen Coe. I could cope with the technical challenges when climbing, and prepare for the weather’s own little games, but I had seen enough stupidity on the roads while cycling to leave me more than a little apprehensive. It would mean trusting other people to make sensible decisions, and all I needed for evidence of the utter fallacy of that idea, apart from how drivers behaved around me, would be a quick look at some of the footwear exhibited around the summit of Yr Wyddfa.

Put those thoughts away, girl. As I slipped the bacon under the gas, I heard more feet on the stairs, and gradually the room filled with their owners. It was a real mix, for of course we had the Woodruffs and Johnsons, with a few of their extended families, as well as a collection of girls from school leavened with three of the boys.

I mentally slapped myself: men, not boys, not now. Alys was among the new arrivals, and as I gave another stir to the beans, she slipped her arms around me and kissed the back of my neck. Not ashamed, ever, and now no longer to be hidden away. I squeezed her hand where it lay on my waist.

“How’s your head, love?”

She patted my side fondly.

“Not too bad, considering the number of empties in that bin bag over there”

“I don’t think they all came from you, even if you did try your best”

“Your Dad’s mate was no slouch”

“Which one? Neil or Illtyd?”

“I meant Illtyd, but now you mention it… I’m going to take a cuppa up to Neil, just in case. Hi, Shan: he up yet?”

Miss Pink laughed.

“Soon as that bacon smell gets up there, they’ll all be down. Even Mum Ginny, if she was here. Says it’s one thing even veggies can’t resist. Tea in that pot?”

It wasn’t long before I was being handed plates, bowls and camping pans to load with food, including the scrambled eggs Sali whipped up in another giant pot. Conversation noise and laughter built steadily as the dorms emptied and the common room filled, and then I was pulled away from the stove by Dad.

“Sit and eat yours, love, while there’s still some left. I know this lot. Even if I don’t actually know them, I still know what they’re like, if you see what I mean. Gannets, all of them”

I found myself smiling at the picture, but it was seagulls I saw in my mind’s eye. Even on the tops of the Three Thousands, there were gulls hanging around looking for scraps. That was so different from some of the tops the woodruffs had taken us to in the Cairngorms, where the bird life, according to Alys, had been mainly meadow pipits and wheatears. I squeezed in between Neil and Annie with a fully loaded plate of calories and a brimming bowl of porridge, and as I proceeded to fuel myself, the laughter and teasing continued around me. As soon as my porridge was gone, someone put a plate of toast in front of me, and that was done without me even spotting who it had been.

Just one of those mornings.

We had timed the celebration for a Friday night, so that those who had travelled from further away might have more time to enjoy the hills. Dad had kept the bunkhouse closed to external bookings for the weekend, so that we had room for guests that didn’t have to involve tents and transport up and down the valley. The Cow had almost been bursting with the numbers, and of course we had to take over the folk evening in our own way, which was when sanity finally waved a rapid farewell as Mr Conway gave up trying to separate the notional floor spots, and we turned the evening into one long session. Mrs Edwards had kept her sober head on, so she was able to run a shuttle service for those who hadn’t wanted to walk all the way back up, but once her last run was done, she had parked up at home and joined the rest of us in banishing that sobriety and embracing inebriation like a long-lost friend.

I had ended up in a cuddle with her back at the bunkhouse, and she had been forthright indeed about Alys.

“So good, this. So… so, such a relief, love. We thought, you know. Lost her again. But there she is. Look at that smile! How could those doctors not have seen that from day one? Life in her now, so much of it! What you doing if you get the results?”

I tried to shrug, squeezed together as we were, but it was more of a wriggle.

“You know that—the adventure sports stuff”

“Yeah, yeah. I know that. That placement year thing—what are you doing then?”

“Looking to do Plas y Brenin, if we get the chance. Dad said he’d have some words. Got mates there”

“Yeah, well Alys has big ideas. Wants to do somewhere exotic. Somewhere warm”

“She hasn’t mentioned that to me yet”

“Yeah. You need to talk to her. Worried she’ll upset you, she is. Wants to go somewhere there’s less rain, or at least where the rain is warmer”

She shook herself, looking at her glass.

“I only wanted to catch the rest of you up, not beat you to the finish. Talk to her, Enfys, not tonight, though. It’s… Look at that smile!”

I could almost read her mind just then, and there were words there, written in her own smile, and the way her eyes had followed my lover around the room. One word in particular.

Relief.