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I was 7 years old and bored. My brother wouldn't play with me and I had no friends. I was a very shy child and didn't mix well with other boys. I found them noisy and rough.
I asked my mum if I could play outside and got the normal reply.
"Yes ok, but stay in the street, don't go around the corner."
This was 1969 we never seemed to worry about children going missing. It never happened much or it wasn't reported on.
I wandered towards the end of my street and saw Susan playing with Mary on the front lawn. I used to dream of being Susan. She always wore such pretty dresses. He hair was in ribbons most of the time. I envied her so much as I stood in my blue knitted jumper and grey shorts. It wasn't fair, why couldn't I wear dresses.
The girls were having a tea party with their dolls. They had them a arranged on little pink chairs around a table full of plastic cups and plates. They were saying things like.
"More tea?"
"Would you like some cake?"
I wanted to join in, so asked if I could play. Susan laughed.
"Don't be silly, boys don't play with dolls!"
I went home with tears in my eyes, angry and sad. It wasn't fair. Why can't I be a girl?
Upstairs in my room and looked through my toys. I pulled out my action man. I searched out the accessories and found a knife, a rifle and a pistol.
I dressed him a camouflage uniform and worked out a way to attack and kill my brothers action man.
I pulled the string to make him talk.
"Hold your fire until I give the order"
"Commander to base: Request support fire"
Then set about shooting and stabbing my brothers action man.
"Die, die!"
Boys don't play with dolls. Do they?
I can't understand why boys often grow up more violent than girls. Can you?
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Comments
Reminds me of my childhood
My sister always had time for me until she started having friends then she stopped playing dolls with me. Funny thing is she thinks she ruined me by dressing me up as a girl. She forgets it was always my idea and I was always a girl but my girl side had to go into hiding my dad wanted a son he could hunt and fish with.
EllieJo Jayne
You know
It comes out completely different if you leave the last three words off: "my dad wanted a son he could hunt ..."
Hugs,
Erin
= Give everyone the benefit of the doubt because certainty is a fragile thing that can be shattered by one overlooked fact.
I was the middle of 3 sons. I
I was the middle of 3 sons. I wish I had sisters, I was never comfortable with hugging, only now at past 50 I realize what a hug can do. I didn't really get it until I suffered with depression. Now I have to resist hugging people.
My mother preyed for a girl. Her sister had 4 boys trying for a girl. I often wondered if I heard her in the womb. She's 83 now, I wonder if I should come out to her. I'm a closet girl that has too much invested in my male life to throw it away. Sometimes it hurts. Then again, as the song go's Everybody Hurts.
Leeanna
Everybody Hurts
Very true.
Would it make your Mum happy to come out to her or not?
I fear that it wouldn't help. It oft causes confusion to older people. It did to mine.
Lucy xx
"Lately it occurs to me..
what a long strange trip its been."
I have tiptoed around the
I have tiptoed around the subject with her on a car journey . The subject of TG and cd was on the radio. She told me if my dad had done it she would have wanted to take him out dressed. I also joke about borrowing her clothes, So not sure. Don't want her to have a heart attack though
Leeanna
Isn't it expected?
The last line in this story begs a question that gets answered every time a boy doesn't act aggressive and is tormented because of it.
Given what are considered toys for boys, or used to be, aren't boys expected to be aggressive? Aren't boys, in a way, taught to be aggressive from an early age?
From generation to generation it's always assumed a boy will be more aggressive than a girl. That he will play the aggressive sports, do the aggressive activities. That is what the male of the species has done for ages.
It's only when a boy doesn't act aggressive, or has learned to control his aggressiveness that he's set upon by those who feel he isn't being one of the boys.
The surprise comes when this boy is put into a corner, that his aggression becomes frightening and he defends himself to the total defeat of those who attacked him.
What isn't talked about too much is how aggressive a girl can get. Girls aren't supposed to be aggressive they say. And when she is or has to be, she's ripped for being ungirly.
Others have feelings too.