Easy As Falling Off A Bike pt 2614

The Daily Dormouse.
(aka Bike, est. 2007)
Part 2614
by Angharad

Copyright© 2015 Angharad

  
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This is a work of fiction any mention of real people, places or institutions is purely coincidental and does not imply that they are as suggested in the story.
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“Before we go any further, I feel we should set some ground rules.”

“Such as?” asked his excellency.

“Such as we respect each other and show a degree of honesty, which I appreciate is possibly the exact opposite of diplomacy.”

His face was deadpan. “Do you have such a low opinion of my profession?”

“I am trying to remain impersonal. We all represent vested interests. They are directly opposed to each other. They both control significant resources and could thus cause injury or pain to each other on an increasing scale. It would be tantamount to all out warfare which could easily involve governments confronting each other. My intention is to try and reduce the confrontation to reduce suffering and for a lasting truce to be established.

“Rather than knocking your profession, your excellency, I’m asking you to demonstrate it and stop this stupidity before it gets out of hand, because neither of us can win, just lose a little less than their opponent.”

The two Russians spoke quietly with lots of nodding or shaking of heads. Henry patted my knee presumably as being a gesture of support rather than a dirty old man.

“So you will sell us the bank?” was his opening gambit. I felt Henry tense though he was still smiling.

“What would we get in return?” I asked.

“You would have a decent price and live in peace.”

“How much is a decent price?” I asked.

“We would have to consider that.”

“I should think anything in excess of a trillion US dollars would be acceptable.”

“Pounds sterling,” added Henry realising I wasn’t going to sell his bank.

“This is the famous British sense of humour?”

“Possibly, we always joke when we are most serious.”

“You are joking?”

“Not about the price.”

“I can tell you now that it is ridiculous.”

“No more so than the hostile bid you’re fronting.”

“You think our offers are ridiculous?”

“Your previous actions have been criminal and reprehensible, hardly ridiculous.”

“I think this meeting is over.”

“Sit down ambassador and listen.”

“I’m sorry, but I don’t take orders from some jumped up dormouse catcher. I represent the government of the Russian nation.”

“I might be a jumped up dormouse catcher, but I’m an honest one, you’re the representative of a bunch of gangsters who bully their way to success. You cannot win a war with us.”

“I’ve had enough of this stupid woman, who do you think you are?”

“For you, the angel of death.”

“For a stupid woman you have some delusions of grandeur. I think probably, you do not appreciate who you are threatening.”

“You misunderstand me, ambassador. I’m not issuing threats, I’m making prophecies. If you don’t resolve this matter you will die within the year, your daughter will already have died.”

“How dare you make threats about my children.”

“I’m not, you daughter has a brain tumour, it needs immediate attention. You won’t believe me until she goes blind by which time it will be too late. You, will fall foul of one of your oligarch friends and be assassinated by next Easter.”

“This is nonsense.”

“Of course it is, but you will slip and sprain your ankle on the way back into the embassy. You won’t heed my warning until it happens, then you’ll wish you had. I can save your daughter but you’ll reject my offer as you feel it’s some sort of ploy. Perhaps it is, but it’s true. To prove it I will heal your ankle—or will I? Just to prove a point? You already know what I can do—I can fill cart loads of body-bags with your agents, or you can leave us and our bank alone and annoy someone else instead.

“I accept you have greater resources in terms of money available, but is it worth the lives of your family—you included, just for a bank to launder your drug money?”

“You don’t frighten me, girly-boy.”

“You’re a bigger fool than I thought, then. I can save your daughter, your surgeon will paralyse her.”

“I have more faith in him than your mumbo jumbo,” he practically spat at me.

“Have it your own way—enjoy your trip.”

“What trip?”

“The one you will have tonight, oh and they’ll recall you for failure within a month. It will then be too late to save your daughter. I’m sorry for her, living with a murdering bandit.”

“You bitch,” he raised his hand to hit me and I launched a small attack of my own. The blue light knocked him backwards landing on his staggering companion. They both went down

He tried to regain his dignity. “If you lay one finger on her, I shall have you burned alive.”

“If you love her you’ll pack up your yurt and play somewhere else oh and you’ll ask me to cure her.”

“Hell will freeze over first.”

“You’ll be there long before me,” I smiled.

“I wouldn’t bet on it, Lady Cameron—ha.”

“I would. I have seen it.”

“You are sick—I will take your bank and impoverish your family.”

“If I’m sick, you should look in the mirror—when you do, say goodbye to yourself.”

“Well that was a waste of time,” said Spicer.

“He’ll be back and within the week.”

“I doubt it.”

“I’ll remove the protection I’m giving his daughter. She’ll be blind in a fortnight.”

“I’d prefer we didn’t fight this with our children’s lives.”

“So would I, but it’s the only weapon we have.”

“I can’t see him falling for it.”

“He will, it’s already ordained”

“I didn’t think you believed in that sort of thing”

“I’m a girl of surprises.”

“Sure you are.”

Two hours later I received an anonymous call asking me to cure the girl.

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