Chapter 15

The phone rang in our suite waking both Mom and me.

“Hello,” Mom said.

“Oh my God, have you seen the news?”

It was Gloria, and she was beside herself.

“What news?”

“Well not really the news, but the gossip news?”

“God no, I never watch that crap.”

“Well maybe you should, your daughter is the morning headlines.”

“How can that be? All she did was go to the award show and a party afterward.”

“Exactly, and guess what? Jason and Amanda kissed in front of God and everyone else.”

“Amanda kissed a boy?”

“Not just any boy Rachel, she kissed Jason Steele, and would you like to know who the story is about? Amanda Flowers, not Jason Steele, but Amanda Flowers. Amanda is now our countries newest sweetheart and everything she does is now news. You should have heard the conversation, was this her first kiss, is she in love with Jason Steele, or more importantly, is Jason Steele in love with Amanda Flowers. Every teen and tween girl is living through Amanda Flowers and if Jason hurts her, there will be Hell to pay. What was Amanda thinking?”

“I have no idea, Gloria, but there must be some explanation.”

“I hope there is. Amanda’s life just changed and she isn’t going to have a moments peace from now on.”

Gloria hung up the phone and Mom called me from my bedroom. Yep, we got the two-bedroom suite. Hollywood Models really knows how to spend money.

“Amanda, I just got a call from Gloria and she said something about you kissing Jason Steele. Is she telling the truth?”

“It was just a goodnight kiss Mom, nothing happened.”

“I’m afraid something did happen and now it’s all over the news.”

“What news?”

“News from the awards ceremony, you know the one that highlights what all the women were wearing, and who was with whom. You know what was said about your goodnight kiss?”

“What?”

“Was this Amanda Flowers first kiss and were you and Jason in love and to make matters worse, the story was about you, with Jason as an after thought.”

“Oh my God.”

“Gloria said our lives are going to change, but this is so new to us, I have no idea of what’s going to happen.”

We packed and called for our limo to bring us to the airport. As we exited the front doors of the hotel, I saw the changes Gloria had said would take place. Photographers, and people surrounded the entrance with microphones, all shoving and pushing to get closer to me. I felt like a dear caught in the headlights.

“Amanda, what was it like when Jason kissed you? Amanda, are you going to see Jason again? Are you in love? Was he your first kiss? Did he call you for another date? Are you seeing anyone else? Amanda, do you have any advice for other girls your age?”

I was dumb struck. I couldn’t utter a word. Who cares what I think or say? I’m just a fourteen-year-old girl from Colfax who had gone on an arraigned date with a boy as eye candy. How was I to know I would be the center of interest and not Jason, as planned, but even worse was that I had no idea of what I should do now?

The doorman pushed an opening to the limo and held the door open for us to enter. I got in first and Mom followed. The door was shut and the car lurched forward, flashes blinding us through the window.

“Mom, what was that?”

“That my dear was an indication of what your fans think of you.”

“But I haven’t done anything.”

“Exactly, and that’s why everyone wants to get to know you.”

“Mom, I don’t know about this. I thought all I had to do was be a girl and take some photos. What happens if they find out about Mark?”

“Honey, we’ve done everything possible for that not to happen. I just hope it was enough.”

We arrived at the airport to more flashes and questions. I said nothing and was soon on the plane home.

Thankfully we landed at Sacramento and the crush of paparazzi was left in Los Angeles. I doubt celebrities flew into Sacramento more that twice a year and paparazzi made their money with quantity and not quality. That explained the absence of the flashing cameras.

Things settled down after that. The next week I was on the cover of most of the rags and knew my pictures would end up on the bottom of some birdcage somewhere. I still couldn’t figure out the fascination with Amanda Flowers. Unfortunately for me, that fascination didn’t die on the floor of LAX, and it would take time, but the rats would find me.

The next big event came December twenty-first. Dad came home. It was the best Christmas present I could have had.

Let me explain that my father had been in therapy since his release from the hospital and had worked his tail off trying to get better. He could walk with a cane and some of his memory had returned, mostly with regard to his job. He would be able to return to his job if he had a way of getting there. That wouldn’t be a problem, I would see to that.

Before Dad returned home Mom had the house brought up to handicap standards. Ramps for a wheelchair and doors wide enough for the chair to get through, handles in the bathroom and all the rest were built. The money spent and used to drive him to work was much less than the huge amounts spent in the home where Dad had been living. Dad was just glad to be home with his wife and princess.

The holiday season was quiet around our house. Dad was happy being home and being able to spend everyday with his daughter. Mom loved doting on her husband but it had only been two weeks that he had been home and I’m sure she’ll tire of it, but it didn’t seem it would happen soon.

Dad returned to work at the end of January. I had been helping him to walk every day and he had improved a little each day. He had a long way to go, but he was getting there.

I flew to Loa Angeles the second week of February for another photo shoot. I had grown to five foot eight and I was starting to get some curves of my own. I wondered if getting those curve would make me feel even better about being Amanda. I think it has. Being perfectly honest with myself, I missed being Mark, but now I was feeling better about myself. I felt as though my mind was beginning to match my body, if that makes any sense. What I’m trying to say is that I felt like a fraud before I started hormones, but as my body changed so did what I thought of myself. I was really becoming Amanda Flowers and when I looked at my reflection in a mirror it confirmed what I now felt, I was really a girl.

My career had blossomed with my body. I was making more money that I thought possible, but that would pale with the next big step in my life. I was asked to audition for a movie contract.

I flew to Los Angeles with Mrs. Meyer because Mom had to stay with Dad. As usual we stayed at the Bonaventure in a suite provided by the film studio. The gaggle of paparazzi was waiting when we arrived. I don’t know how they knew, unless they camp in front of the hotel. They asked the same questions as the last time I saw them, except they wanted to know if I was dating someone new. My only thought was why don’t you get a life?

The next day we were driven to a film studio and I was given three scripts to memorize and then act for a camera. It took over twelve hours before they were done.

The director said I did a good job and they would let me know if they would call me for any up coming roles, in other words don’t call us, we’ll call you.

“You really did do a wonderful job, Amanda. My only concern is that you’ve grown so tall lately that there aren’t many actors you will be able to star with.”

“I thought most of the male actors were tall?”

“Goodness no. Most are short and with heels you would tower over them.”

“Well at least I’m tall enough to do runway modeling now.”

“Yes you are, which reminds me, it’s Spring week in New York next month and you’ve been asked to model one of the top lines of clothes.”

“Really”

“Yep, really. I’d better let your mom know so it won’t be too much of a shock.”

Mrs. Meyer let Mom know the dates of the New York shows and she was able to hire a nurse to stay with Dad for the two weeks I would be gone. Yep, I would be modeling more than one line of clothing.

The shows in New York were exciting and my developing figure made the clothes fit that much better. I was growing to really like modeling and I found I liked being Amanda more each day. I have become very comfortable being a girl. Thoughts of Mark hadn’t crossed my mind in weeks.

I thought the paparazzi were only interested in me only out West, but I was wrong. Mom and I couldn’t go anywhere without at least five or more photographers following our every move. The constant flashes and attention couldn’t help but draw my fans like moths to a flame. I vowed to never turn anyone down that asked for an autograph, so it was a rare day that I didn’t have cramps in my fingers. I had my tutor, thank God, or I’d miss school to the point I would have to give up my dream of attending Stanford. My grade point average has been a 4.0 since attending the private school in Auburn. My councelor recommended that I go out for a sport and volunteer to help at a charity to raise my grade point average above where it is now. I wondered how I was going to fit all of it in with my job. All I can do is try.

There weren’t many Spring sports available so I signed up for track. I’ve always been a good runner so it was a fit for me.

Track practice started and I found how out of shape I had become. Being a model and being an athlete are two different things. When I was Mark I was a very fast runner, but as I’ve grown I seem to have lost some of my speed. I wonder if it was because I hadn’t been running for several years, or my new body might be the reason. Maybe after training for a while I’ll be able to tell.

We heard back from the film studio and they were impressed with my audition and said they would try to find an actor tall enough to work with me.

I trained for track and only missed one day while I had a photo shoot. Thankfully our school makes provisions for students such as me that have other interests that interfere with the school schedule. Coach decided to have me run the 800 meters because he found I have very good stamina and am fast enough to have a good kick at the end of the race. Being on the team has gained me new friends and I like the comraderie. Luckily the paparazzi haven’t found me, or my school, yet. Traveling to Auburn isn’t in their schedule as the next closest person of interest would be in San Francisco. I might be America’s newest sweetheart, but not enough to justify wasting a day traveling to watch me run a race at a track meet, thank God.

Now getting back to me, the girl me. I no longer have to wear my fillets. My breasts have developed enough that they show with my bra. I have hips, but I feel like I’m getting fat. Mom says I look very nice, but maybe not having hips for so long makes me think any development is huge. I’ve also grown to five foot nine. I hope I stop growing soon since I’m now tall enough for runway. I guess you could say I have a models shape and the start of an athletic figure.

I look at myself in the mirror and feel very pleased with my decision to start my puberty. I feel more like a real girl everyday. Just when I’m really pleased with myself I look in the mirror and ask myself if I’m doing the right thing? Do I really want to be the beautiful girl in the mirror or am I fooling myself into trying to forget Mark? I miss the carefree attitude I once had as a boy. I didn’t have to worry that if I hurt myself I might ruin a promising career. I wonder if I would have begun to fill out with muscle as male hormones filled my body? Would I have liked girls as more than just friends? I might never know. Don’t get me wrong, I know I made the right decision; it’s just that I wonder what might have been?

Dad seems to be getting stronger every day. I love the interaction with him. Dad loves me very much and is so proud of his little girl, even though I’m almost as tall as him. I guess the good part of going to school in Auburn is that Mom can drive both Dad and me to work and school without making a special trip. That might end soon as Dad is looking into hand controls for the car and if he can manage it, will soon be driving himself to work.

Cindy and I are as close as ever. We talk daily about our feelings and of course boys. Cindy has a boyfriend and he’s all she ever talks about, Lonnie this and Lonnie that, it’s so cute. Kurt and I still see each other at lunch and even though we can’t date, it feels like were boyfriend and girlfriend. The longer I’ve been on hormones, the more at ease I feel with having a boyfriend. I no longer feel as though I’m involved in a homosexual experience but in a real boy, girl relationship.

Kurt has mentioned the Prom is coming up soon and has asked me to go with him. This only proved that we have become more than lunch buddies and we have a real relationship. As much as I hate to admit it, I think I’ve fallen in love. If I have, Mom’s going to be so angry with me, I just know. I don’t know how Dad will feel about me seeing Kurt even if it’s just for the dance, but I guess I’ll cross that bridge when I come to it.

“Mom, Kurt asked me to the Prom. Can I go?”

Unlike the first dance I went to, Mom didn’t freak out like I thought she would.

“Kurt again? Are you two seeing each other?”

“Mom, the only time I see him is at school, it’s just that we’re really good friends.”

“Well, he behaved himself the last time he took you to a dance, so I guess it will be okay. I think we should ask your father too, now that he’s home.”

“Ask me what?” Dad asked, from the living room.

“A boy has asked Amanda to go to the prom with him and wants to know if we’ll let her go?”

“I don’t mind, as long as I meet him first.”

“That shouldn’t be a problem, Dad. I’ll ask him to come by and meet you. He’s already met Mom.”

“When was that?”

“Last year when he took me to the Homecoming dance.”

“He’s a very nice young man, Lance.”

“I’d still like to meet him. Amanda, would you help me with my exercises?”

“Yes Dad, you know I always do.”

I gave Kurt the good news as soon as I saw him in the morning. I should mention he waits for me to arrive at school and we walk hand in hand whenever we’re together.

“I asked my parents if I could go to the Prom with you, and they said yes,” I said, excitedly.

“Thank God, I didn’t want to have to ask anyone else.”

“Who would you have asked?” I asked, jealously.

“I hadn’t even thought about it. You’re the only one I wanted as a date.”

I squeezed his hand.

“Kurt, I have to ask you something. Why don’t you date any other girl beside me? You know my mother won’t let me go on a regular date, so why me?”

“Because I really like you and because we can’t date like other kids, my grades don’t suffer. Going to a good college is the most important thing right now, and as much as I like you, not being able to date you makes it that much easier to study. I won’t deny wanting to take you out like any other couple, but it’s probably for the best that we don’t.”

“Maybe when I’m sixteen?” I giggled.

“Sure thing, I’ll fly home on the weekends from school, yep my parents will be more than happy to pay for those college expenses.”

“I know, I’m being selfish, but I do have feelings for you.”

“And I for you. Why do you think I walk with you everyday? Someday you and I will be able to spend the time we want together and don’t forget, you want to attend Stanford when you graduate and dating me wouldn’t be the best thing for you either.”

I was so lucky to have Kurt for my friend. He really knew how to make me feel special.

The Prom was a month away so I had time to do what girls usually do, look for a dress. Mom took Cindy and me to Sacramento to find the perfect go to prom gown, but we didn’t find anything I liked. We still had three weeks to go, so there would be time.

Two weeks before the prom I had a very busy week in Los Angeles. There was another shoot for Lush and three clothing lines. I found as I grew in height, doors opened for me to model clothes. The more I modeled, the more my popularity grew and it seemed my fans couldn’t get enough of their newest sweetheart. Fortunately for me, that meant more work, but it also meant more intrusion into my life by paparazzi. I had been fortunate enough to only have them bother me when I went on assignment and they pretty much left me alone when I was at home. That changed when I opened my big mouth at one of my clothing shoots.

“I love this outfit,” I mentioned to one of the girls helping me change between pictures.

“It is cute and if you like it, I’m sure the manufacturer will let you keep it.”

“You really think so?”

“They usually let the girls keep a few of the clothes they model as a thank you.”

“I wish I was modeling prom dresses. I’m going to my first prom in two weeks and I can’t find anything to wear.”

“Are you serious, I would think Amanda Flowers would have her choice of outfits.”

“Not really, Mom and I went shopping and I couldn’t find anything to wear.”

“You went shopping for a gown?”

“Yes, I’ve grown out of everything I own.”

“I think maybe I can help. I’ll call you next week.”

We flew back to Sacramento and an hour later we were home.

“Did my girls have a nice time?” Dad asked, when we walked through the door.

When Mom and I went for a shoot, Dad was left to fend for himself with a little help from Mrs. Meyers. She would make sure he had something to nuke when he returned from work. As I mentioned, Dad has become much stronger and has gained more movement in his legs and hopefully he’ll be able to walk without his canes. One thing that has helped was the purchase of a new car for Dad, a Prius with hand controls. Dad is now free to drive himself to work. Having this freedom has meant wonders as far as his mental health is concerned. There were times when he had a shadow hanging over his head because he was trapped at home. Now it was as though the sun had come out from behind a cloud. As he gained his freedom it seems his memory has slowly been returning. I wonder if he’ll ever remember Mark and what I’ll do when he does?

My father and I have become very close since his accident, and I have truly become his little girl, even though I’m almost as tall as he is now. There aren’t words enough to say how much I love him, and there’s no way for him to hide his feelings for me. I’m truly blessed to have this man in my life, as Mark and now as Amanda. I’m grateful everyday I spend with my father and the special relationship we have as father and daughter. I only hope it won’t be destroyed if he ever does remember his son.

“I can’t say it was a nice time, dear, it was more like work. It was fun when it started, but I’m getting tired of all the travel.”

“And did my girl wow them as usual?” Dad kidded.

“Dad, you know its just work and I’m no different than any other model.”

“Honey, your much different than any other model, you’re special.”

“Dad, I’m not.”

“But you are, but I guess I’m prejudiced. I don’t know what I’d do without my princess.”

“Daaad,” I said, giving my father a hug.

I had forgotten my conversation with Linda, the girl who helped me during the shoot. She called Monday afternoon. My cell phone rang and I didn’t recognize the number.

“Hello.”

“Amanda, hi, it’s Linda,” she said, when I answered my cell.

“Oh, hi, Linda, what’s up?”

“Girl, I have news for you. I asked around to see if I could get a dress for you, and guess what?”

“What?”

“I found three designers that want you to wear their dress.”

“Three?”

“Yes, and it won’t cost you a cent.”

“Why?”

“Because you’re Amanda Flowers. You don’t think those movie ladies pay for anything they wear, do you?”

“I don’t know?”

“Well, they don’t, and the designers are going to get a hold of your agent. It will be up to you to decide which dress to wear. Girl, you’re going to knock them dead.”

My head was spinning. All I wanted was a dress from a store. Now I wondered what kind of can of worms I had opened? I found out the next day when Mom and I went to the grocery store.

As we stood in line to pay for our groceries I could help looking at the gossip newspapers lining the cash line. When I saw the headline I almost fainted.

“AMANDA’S FIRST PROM. WHO’S THE LUCKY GUY?”

“Mom, look,” I said, pointing to the publication.

“Oh my God.”

Mom grabbed the issue and the others with the same type of headline. No one said a word or looked at me any differently than when we walked into the store. I, of course, wasn’t wearing any makeup, so maybe no one realized the girl in the photo was me.

When we arrived home, the first thing we did was read the articles. The big question was who my date was and if I was in some sort of relationship. Next was what I was going to wear? Who’s design was good enough for Amanda Flowers? God I felt like crawling under a rock. It didn’t take long for my best friend to call.

“Amanda, did you see?”

“Yes, and I’m so embarrassed.”

“Why? Mom says this is the best thing for your career.”

“But Cindy, it’s no ones business who I go to the prom with. Kurt and I are just friends.”

“You keep saying that, but if he didn’t like you, he’d have asked someone else, and I know you have feelings for him. Face it Amanda, you have a boyfriend.”

Cindy was right, I did have feelings for Kurt and I knew there was nothing we could do to pursue those feelings because I was still a fourteen-year-old girl and even more importantly I was still a boy.

“I don’t Cindy.”

“Okay, if you say so. Have you decided on what you’re going to wear yet?”

“I haven’t seen the dresses yet.”

“I hope they don’t wait too long. You have to have your hair done and makeup. Do you know where your gong to have it done?”

“No. I haven’t even thought of that part of it.”

“Well you’d better, because I’m sure most of the salons will be booked up by now.”

“God Cindy, I didn’t know this would be such a hassle.”

“Girl, it’s not a hassle, it’s fun. I wish I was going with you.”

“You would be if you went to my school.”

“Yeah, right.”

“You’re beautiful and you know it, I have to run, love you.”

Thursday Mrs. Meyer called to let me know Hollywood Models had arraigned for three choices of clothing for me to wear. All were highly visible designer labels and my decision would add many sales to their line. I hadn’t modeled for any of them, so it didn’t make any difference whom I picked, but I would probably start modeling their line after my decision. I was also told that because of the high visability of my choice, all my accessories would be provided, as would my hairstyle and makeup. This no longer felt like a date but more like a job. I was now becoming more aware of the viability of my popularity. Amanda Flowers was becoming a thing rather than a person, and I’m not sure if I liked what I was becoming.

Monday the three dresses were delivered along with shoes and accessories. Each dress was a different color and the shoes were dyed to match. The dresses were the most beautiful I had ever seen and was warned not to do any harm to them trying them on, as the least expensive was over five thousand dollars.

I tried them all and the decision was very difficult to make. One dress was for someone much more endowed than me so as much as I liked it, it wouldn’t work. The other two were perfect and it would be a choice Mom would make rather than me.

“Amanda, that dress is much too short for you to wear.”

“But Mom, it’s so pretty.”

“And sexy I might add. There’s no way my daughter is going to wear a dress like that, especially at fourteen.”

The dress in question was made of lace with nude satin covering places that shouldn’t be seen, but was revealing enough to make it look as though I was wearing sexy lingerie. With the heels I would be a walking wet dream.

The last dress wasn’t see through, but it was sexy. It was metallic gold satin with fabric wide enough to cover my breasts but not much more that went from my waist up over my shoulders and back down to my waist in back. There was a thin strap going across my shoulder blades meant to keep the fabric from falling off my shoulders and exposing things that weren’t supposed to be exposed. The best way to describe the dress would be a wide strap, skin, wide strap, exposed side, strap, skin, strap, exposed side and back to the original strap, as I mentioned, very sexy. From the waist down it was sleek and smooth stopping at a bias cut from just above mid thigh on the right to just below mid thigh on the left. To say I exposed more of my leg than I was used to would be an understatement and if it weren’t for the free dress, Mom would have never let me buy such a beautiful item. The Giuseppe Zanotti sandals that were coordinated with the dress would make me almost as tall as Kurt. I had never worn anything so high on my feet, and loved the way I looked. Mom just shook her head.

The weekly rags came out and the stories were the same, who was Amanda Flowers date? Was she going with Jason Steele? Stupid people, I was invited, not Jason Steele. I could tell Kurt was becoming uncomfortable with the attention I was the center of, but he didn’t say anything to me about it.

We learned Wednesday that Teen was going to do an article about my first prom and there would be a photographer with me the whole day before the prom. This was getting so out of hand that I almost wished I hadn’t accepted the date. Another surprise was that Hollywood Models was going to supply a limo for the evening. Kurt had mentioned that he and Melisa’s date were going to use Kellon’s parent’s car. It was a Cadillac Escalade and it was only a few years old. Kellon is Melisa’s new boyfriend by the way.

Some days I ride to school with Dad and other with Melisa. The days I don’t model are the days with Melisa, since she’s on the softball team and our practices end about the same time. We arrived at school and Kurt was waiting with his usual smile.

“Hi Amanda.”

Hi Kurt. Guess what? My modeling agency wants us to ride to the dance and back in a limo, and they’re paying for it.”

“Swear to God?”

“Yep, it’s a done deal.”

“Way cool, did you tell Melisa?”

“Yes, on the way to school. There are a couple of other things though, kind of like strings attached to the offer. We’re going to have a photographer following us all night, even at the dance. Teen is going to do an article about me going to my first prom so you will be in it because I’m your date.”

“It sounds like fun to me.”

“Maybe to you, but its too much like work for me. Wait until you see my dress, remember, hands off,” I giggled.

Thursday I brought paper work for Kurt to sign for his part in the photo shoot, as did Melisa and Kellon. They were going to pay them four hundred dollars for their troubles. They definitely liked that.

Saturday, the day of the prom arrived, photographers and makeup people invaded our home. What I thought would be a fun day getting ready for my date turned into a drudge of work. I bathed, shaved and then the work began. My hair had to be cut and styled, my nails done, before the hard work started. It was makeup on, makeup off. My dress was hung nearby so my makeup would compliment rather than clash when it was finished. It took most of the day for it to be done. Let me explain. Every step was photographed, my eye, skin, and lips. The makeup person would put one thing on and then there would be pictures taken. Each step I was asked to pretend that I was putting on the makeup so when the girls bought the magazine they would think they could have the same results as Amanda Flowers. It might have been deceptive, but it sold magazines and it proved Amanda Flowers was just like them.

My makeup being finished I was able to dress. The dress was carefully lowered over my head and heels placed on my feet. The dress fit my new curves perfectly and the lack of breast development actually looked sexy. Brenda, one of the women from Teen added discreet double side tape to keep the top straps from exposing my tiny breasts. I looked at the finished product in the full height mirror and was shocked. I looked as though I was eighteen years old and would be stopping traffic wherever I went. I was gorgeous and saw where this dress was going to sell, if you could afford it. I imagine the knock offs would be on the market in days.

The way our date was choreographed, Kurt was to arrive at six to take us to dinner with Melisa and Kellon. The Limo driver picked them up first so the princess, me, could be attended to by her subjects in waiting. It was such a sham. I have to admit, Kurt was a good sport about all this.

Before Kurt arrived I was primped and photographed just like any other modeling session. I must have done a hundred poses turning and smiling for the camera. When Kurt arrived he was put through the same drill, except it was an exciting exercise for him. The first always is. Thankfully the photographer didn’t ride in the limo with us. It was the first private moment I had all day.

“Your beautiful,” Kurt said, putting his arm around my shoulder.

“Thanks, you look pretty good yourself,” I replied, which he did.

I snuggled into his shoulder, being careful not to mess my makeup and leave a stain on his tuxedo jacket.

Kurt’s arm felt good and his hand on the bare skin of my shoulder was doing things to me I didn’t think possible. My stomach was a jumble of butterflies gathering for their mating season.

“God Amanda, I love your dress,” Melisa said. “I wish I had one like that.”

“You can if you have a spare eight thousand dollars sitting around,” I laughed.

“My God, that’s as much as a car, a used one anyway,” Kellon exclaimed.

“I got it for free, it’s just that I’ll be photographed all night.”

“Hey, if being photographed would get me a car, go for it,” he laughed.

The prom was held at a hotel in Sacramento, so we settled back and chatted for the hour drive from my house to the hotel. We ate dinner in the hotel restaurant so we wouldn’t have to drive more than we had to.

Kurt and I made quite a couple. Being six four, Kurt had grown an inch over the last six months, and me in my five-inch heels stood six three, impressed more than a few people. We felt like we were arriving at the Oscars with the attention we garnered. Unfortunately the photographer froze our every move. Kurt was the consummate gentle man, guiding me with a light touch on my back, his fingers lingering longer than I thought necessary, but I liked it just the same. This dress was going to make seduction easy, at least for Kurt if I wasn’t careful. Seduction on my part took place the first moment Kurt saw me in this dress and I hated being fourteen at the moment.

The school allowed the photographer to go only as far as the door to the ballroom. The private school I attend has many, shall we say kids that don’t want to be seen, because of kidnap possibilities and the best insurance against that, is not knowing who the person is. I was thankful because I was just tired of having my picture taken, This was supposed to be a date with a boy I had real feelings for and nothing dampens a budding romance faster that someone flashing a camera at every move you make. Unfortunately I knew the cameras would be waiting when we finished with the prom.

Kurt and I were judged to be the most attractive couple at the dance, but I disqualified myself because I’m only a freshman and I had way more professional help getting ready than any other girl in attendance. Being attractive is my job and being the recipient of an eight thousand dollar dress more than made up for the trophy.

Cecilia Jefferson and her partner Wendell Kramer won the prize. I’m glad because Cecilia is on the track team with me and she’s really pretty. She reminds me of Beyonce and she’s has a scholarship to either MIT or CIT and has to decide which school to attend. Even though I’m a freshman and she’s a senior, we’ve become quite close for teammates. I asked her why she chose those schools and she answered that she wanted to break a stereotype, that as a black woman she was stupid, and she loved math and believe it or not wanted to become a rocket scientist. She missed being Valedictorian by half of a percentage point. My date had beaten her out for the honor. Kurt was special.

We had talked about my wish to attend Stanford and she told me if I worked my butt off I would make it. I wouldn’t let her down.

Because of Kurt’s popularity he danced with more than a few senior girls at the prom, but I didn’t feel left out as a lot of guys wanted to dance with Amanda Flowers, who wouldn’t? Unfortunately the dance was over much too quickly and it was time to return home. I would be dropped off first because of my age. Leaving the ballroom was much different than when we arrived. Word had gotten out that Amanda Flowers was at the prom, so instead of one photographer there were twenty. In addition there must have been at least a hundred fans waiting for autographs. Poor Kurt, as he had to put up with my duty to sign everything thrust in my direction. It took a half of an hour before we made it to the limo.

The ride home was quiet and I couldn’t help but snuggle into Kurt’s shoulder. Because of the attention I had to ask him not to kiss me goodnight when he dropped me off, but I would kiss his cheek. It was very choreographed, but I’m jumping ahead of myself. I might be a bit of a petulant child, but I did want a goodnight kiss from Kurt and rather than wait for him to make an awkward gesture, I just asked for one.

“Kurt, we can’t kiss when you drop me off, but I really do want to kiss you goodnight, so would you do it now?”

Kurt’s smile would have lit up half of California if it could have been bottled.

He turned his head toward mine, lifted my chin gently, and softly touched his lips to mine. This wasn’t the first kiss Kurt had given me, the first being at the Homecoming dance, but this was different.

I thought back to my first kiss and remembered my reaction to it. I was excited and acted like a girl with her first kiss. I wanted hug myself and felt this was the most wonderful moment of my life, being accepted as a girl, a girl kissed by a boy. It was just like the movies. In fact it was like the movies and I acted the way a young girl should have acted, but now I realized it was just an act to please myself. There really wasn’t any feeling involved with the kiss. Now I felt something different, my body felt excited and peaceful in the same moment. My brain wasn’t saying I was being kissed by a boy and thought how romantic, no, what I felt was a yearning to be with this person for the rest of my life. As I was to learn later in life was that I was falling in love as a woman with a man and I never felt more special.

Kurt and I kissed many more times as we rode home, but then again, so did Melisa and Kellon. I couldn’t help noticing how different I felt with the help of the hormones I was taking. I honestly felt like a real girl every time our lips touched.

The limo dropped me off and Kurt walked me to the door. I kissed his cheek for the photographers and said goodnight. All in all it was a wonderful evening.

I should mention Kurt had met my father on the Thursday he signed the papers for Hollywood. Dad really liked him, who wouldn’t? Kurt was going to Harvard in the fall and would probably play football for them. After the Dad, boyfriend session which every boy must endure sometime in his life I felt more at ease dating Kurt. Whether or not my parents would let me date him again, only time would tell.