“Brenda, there are no guarantees in life. Especially with what one person feels for another and I’m in the same boat as you - I don’t want to be hurt either! You know I was just dumped by my old girl friend and I was angry. But then I realized that you were there and I knew you were a much better person than my last girl friend. I worry too, because I’m having these feelings also and I’ve never felt like this so soon. It scares me as much as it does you.”

 

Runway
By
Arecee

 

---

Chapters 16-17 - Feelings & Frustrations
 
 
Chapter 16
Brenda woke up the next morning, her eyes red from the tears she shed of the previous night. She dressed and went to work, no sense making myself sick about this she reasoned.

Brenda walked through the front door and called Carla to let her know she was there.

“Hi Carla! I’m here.”

“Thank God! The phones have been driving me crazy. Good Morning Brenda!”

Brenda barely had time to remove her sweater before the phone rang.

“Good morning, Universal.”

“I have to talk to Melissa. Is she there?”

“Miss Benson won’t be in for another hour. How may I help you?”

“I have to have that girl. This is Jan Morris, Director of Marketing for Calvin Klein. Have her call me soon as she gets in.” and the phone went dead.

God what was that? Brenda wondered.

The phone rang again and it was pretty much the same. “I want that Voss girl, have Melissa call me before she talks to anyone else.” Brenda took at least twenty calls over the next hour and all of them pertained to Tiffany. Everyone wanted her.

Melissa finally came through the door, looking much the worse for wear. It was obvious that she hadn’t slept much, but she did have a satisfied look on her face.

“Good morning Brenda. Any calls?”

“It’s been crazy,” she answered and handed Melissa a stack of phone messages. “Everyone wants Tiffany.”

“I saw that ad yesterday. She did look good. Thank you.” Melissa said as she took the messages and went on into her office.

Tiffany arrived several minutes later.

“Hi Brenda.”

“Tiffany. You won’t believe what’s going on. EVERYONE wants you!”

“Everyone?”

“Yes, EVERYONE!”

“Who’s everyone?”

“See that Cosmopolitan over there? Open any page and that’s who wants you, girl! You’re famous!”

“I’m not famous! I’ve only been on one back page.”

“You wouldn’t know it from the calls this morning. Everyone wants the Voss girl.”

The phone rang on Melissa’s extension.

“Yes Melissa?”

“When Tiffany gets here, send her right in.”

“She just arrived. I’ll send her in.” Brenda turned back to Tiffany, “Melissa wants you in her office.”

Tiffany went to Melissa’s office and opened the door.

“Tiffany, come on in and close that door.”

Tiffany entered and shut the door behind her.

“Tiffany, you have no idea of the excitement you are creating in our industry. Everyone wants you. We’re going to make so much money! This is so exciting.”

“What am I supposed to do?” Tiffany asked.

“Shows on the runway and photo shoots. Revlon wants you. Do you know what that means?”

“No.”

“It means you’re a millionaire girl and so am I,” Melissa exclaimed excitedly. “You have a show for Bloomingdale’s this afternoon, so you’d better get going and get ready.”

“What will I be wearing?”

“Whatever rags they want you to wear. Who cares? You’re a big buck girl now. Tomorrow I’ve lined you up for another show in the morning and a photo shoot in the afternoon and evening. It’s going to be a long day, so get some rest tonight.”

“Yes Melissa.”

Brenda was waiting for her friend to come out of Melissa’s office.

“What did she say?” Brenda asked.

“She said that I’m a millionaire.”

“Oh my God!”

“I’ll talk to you later. I have a show to do at Bloomingdale’s. I’ll call you when I get home.”

Tiffany left for her assignment while Brenda tended to the increasing number of phone calls.

The door opened, and the ever cheerful Ron entered.

“Good morning Brenda! Is Tiffany around?” he asked.

“Hi Ron. No, you just missed her. Why?”

“I wanted her to sign my Sunday paper before she becomes famous.”

“Well judging by the phone calls this morning, she already is.”

“Melissa called. Is she in?” Ron asked.

“Hold on, I’ll see if she’s busy,” Brenda said. “She said to come in, her office is freezing.”

“Thanks, and you look gorgeous today.”

“Ron you’re not fooling anyone! I could look like shit and you would say the same thing. But thank you anyways,” Brenda said.

Ron seemed to be spending a long time in Melissa’s office and Brenda wondered if that had anything to do with the drugs. I’ll have to see if I can place a listening device in there soon, it might save a lot of time.

The front door opened and Mario came on in with his morning delivery.

“Hi,” he said.

“Hi,” Brenda replied.

“You look nice,” Mario said.

“You’re just saying that because we’re friends.”

“Really, you look very nice. And thanks for coming over yesterday. You made quite an impression on the family.”

“I did? I hope it was good one.”

“My mom really loves you. She wants you there again next week.”

“Really?”

“Yep! And... I would like that too.”

“Can I think about it? I really like you Mario, but I don’t want to rush things. I don’t want your mom to get the wrong idea about us. After all, we just started dating.”

“I feel the same way. My mom is already marrying us off. I’m telling you, she thinks you walk on water.”

“I like her too, she’s so sweet. Are those all of the packages for today?” Brenda asked.

“There is one package for Melissa, marked personal. Shall I bring it in to her?”

“Go ahead. You had better knock first though, Ron is in there. And who knows what they might be doing.”

“Ron and Melissa? I doubt anything would be happening with those two.”

“You never know.”

Mario knocked on the door and Melissa asked him to enter. He delivered the package and continued with his deliveries.

“I’ll phone you at home later tonight,” he said to Brenda.

“Talk to you later,” she smiled back.

The rest of the day went smoothly for Brenda, other than the growing discomfort of her breasts. She would have to get smaller forms soon because the constant pressure was becoming unbearable.

Brenda called Tiffany when she got home, but the answering machine picked up so she left a message to call her back when she got home.

Mario called and they made the usual chit-chat about the day, with the exception that Mario had asked her out for a snack Wednesday evening, after work, which she accepted.

Brenda called Maria after that and left a message about her breast forms and her need for smaller ones. She hoped Maria would call back soon.

It was after nine before Tiffany called.

“Hello,” Brenda said into the phone.

“Hi! It’s me. I’m so tired!!! I didn’t think I’d ever be able to go home!” Tiffany whined.

“Did the show last this long?” Brenda asked.

“No. There was a party there afterwards. Melissa showed up and was selling me to all kinds of people. It was strange! People were fawning all over me. But at the same time, it was really exciting.”

“You’re a star now Tiffany! Things are going to change for you! Don’t forget why we’re here though. We have to find Melissa’s drug source.”

“Have you heard from Bill Cline?”

“No, but I think I’ll call him tomorrow and see if he has found anything.”

“I’ll see you tomorrow then. I’m going to lay down and get some sleep. I have a show in the morning and then a photo shoot after that. It’s going to be a long day,” Tiffany yawned.

Tuesday was very much like Monday - a flurry of phone calls about Tiffany and another visit by Ron.

“I have to check Melissa’s office again,” Ron said.

“She’s not in. Go on in and do what you do,” Brenda said.

“After I’m done, I’ll need to check the coffee room too.”

“I’m sure you will,” Brenda answered with a bit of sarcasm in her voice.

Mario came in next with his usual pile of boxes.

“Hi! How’s it going today?”

“Pretty good. How about you?” she asked with her best smile.

“Good, do you have time for lunch?”

“I wish I did! But I have an errand to run. Maybe tomorrow? That way I can make up for today.”

“Don’t forget we have a dinner date tomorrow!”

“You can be quite sure I haven’t forgotten that.”

“Good! See you later!”

Noon rolled on by and Brenda left for lunch. Her real mission was to call Bill Cline and she couldn’t do that at the office.

Brenda called Bill Cline on her cell phone from a nearby restaurant.

“FBI.”

“Bill Cline, please,” Brenda said.

The call was transferred.

“Bill Cline.”

“Bill, hi. It’s Brenda.”

“Hi Brenda. What’s up?”

“I was wondering if you had anything on the list I gave you?”

“We’re almost done with it. We’ve cleared all but Ron English, Jack Larsen, and Susan Marques.”

Brenda sighed in relief! Mario had been cleared of suspicion!

“Oh, I forgot. That Puccinelli guy is still active too. We’re trying to find more information about him. But it’s hard, because of his time in Colombia.”

Brenda’s heart sank when Bill said that. Mario wasn’t cleared after all.

“Bill, I have to return to work. Can we meet later?” Brenda asked.

“Sure, how about tonight? Around eight?”

“I have nothing going on. That will work.”

“I’ll meet you at the same place as last time. See you then.”

“Bye Bill.”

Brenda returned to work and was very agitated. Her breasts were bothering her and her boyfriend was under suspicion. Maybe it’s all a misunderstanding. Something that will be easy to straighten out. Mario couldn’t be the source! Damn bra!

Tiffany called and said that she was on her way to the photo shoot and that the show went well.

“I’ll call you later tonight when I get home,” Tiffany said.

“I’m seeing Bill Cline after work for a drink. I’ll talk to you later.”

Brenda’s day ended and she found her way to the restaurant for the meeting.

“Hey pretty lady! Found your way back. Did you miss me?” Danny asked.

“Danny, my world would end if it weren’t for you,” Brenda said, her voice dripping with sarcasm.

“At least you remembered my name,” Danny said.

“I’ll bet you don’t remember mine.”

“I never forget a pretty woman’s name, lemon drop, right?”

“Lemon drop is what I drink, you goof,” she giggled, “See you did forget my name!”

“You got me. I can always remember the drink but not the name. So, what’s your name then?”

“Brenda.”

“You aren’t meeting that guy again are you?”

“Yes, why?”

“You two seem so different. You’re pretty and sexy and he’s, well, old.”

“That’s not nice Danny! Actually it’s a business meeting. We work together.”

“That’s a relief! Maybe there’s hope for me yet.”

“Danny, you’re a flirt.”

“It’s good for business.”

“And all this time I thought you loved me. You broke my heart,” laughed Brenda.

“Can I get you a lemon drop?”

“Sure, why not.”

Danny returned with Brenda’s drink and placed it in front of her and asked, “What do you do?”

“I work for a modeling agency. I told you that the last time I was here. I’m the receptionist.”

“I’m sorry. I meet a lot of people and sometimes I forget. I’ll remember next time though. Does that guy work for the agency too?”

“Umm, well kind of… he’s an investor.”

“I’ll bet he’d like to invest in you. Be careful with guys like that Brenda.”

“I will be. Oh, here he comes now.”

“I remember his name too. Mister Double Jack. Don’t let him drive you anywhere!”

“I won’t.”

Bill wandered over to Brenda and sat down next to her.

“Hi Brenda. Been here long?”

“No. I just got here myself.”

“Give me a Double Jack over please,” Bill said to Danny.

“Do you have the list?” Brenda asked.

“Just a partial one. Maybe we should find a table. I really don’t want anyone else to see this.”

The hostess led Brenda and Bill to a table and placed their drinks down for them. Bill finished his drink and ordered another.

“This is what I have so far,” he said. “There really isn’t a lot to go on right now but there are some leads. Jack Larsen is a mystery. I can’t find anything about him other than he visits Melissa once a month with a package of what we don’t know. I’m going to leave him up to you and Tiffany to find out what he’s doing. The next guy is Ron English. His is an interesting connection to this group. We can’t find anything that he has done in the past other than being Lon English’s brother. Lon is a different case. He’s doing five to ten for selling meth and for assault. Now here’s the interesting thing about him, he was dating Susan Marques before he was sent away. He was an engineer in the same building as his brother, in fact Ron got him the job and that was where Susan met Lon and they started seeing each other. We don’t know if Susan knew anything about the meth thing or not, but she still visits Lon once a week and has had conjugal time with him on more than one occasion. Other than that, we have drawn a blank so far.”

“What about Mario Puccinelli?”

“He’s an interesting guy. We’re still trying to find out more about him. All we have so far is that he was involved in delivering cocaine to Panama in truck loads of cow shit. Oops I’m sorry. I mean manure. We’re not sure if he knew he was delivering drugs or not and we’re still looking into it with an undercover operative in Colombia. I can tell you this though, he’s a very lucky man! On his last delivery, he was almost killed. We think the Columbian government was involved in some kind of payoff and some soldiers were going to make an example of him. But he was able to escape before they shot him. We’re looking into whether he was the courier that took the payoff or just some innocent shmuck that was in the wrong place at the wrong time.”

“When will you know more about him?”

“It might be a while. Things move slow down there, so I want you to keep an eye on him and see what you might turn up.”

Brenda wondered how she was going to do that. She had fallen in love with Mario and now she was being asked to investigate him. This shouldn’t have happened! She should have kept to herself and just been an agent and not tried so hard to be a girl - a girl with a boyfriend. She especially didn’t want to be the one to find out that Mario was the drug connection for Melissa, if he was at all. She would have to be careful about her feelings toward Mario and try not to get too involved.

“What about the Ron connection?”

“We have a lot of work with that one! Just try to keep your eye on him and Susan when they are around. As much as I hate to say this, I think we might be in this thing for the long haul. Too many things don’t add up.”

“Thanks for the good news! We thought we would be done with this thing in a month.”

“The way it’s going, we’ll be lucky if we’re done in six months. I hate to run Brenda, but I have a date tonight.”

“You have a date? With whom?”

Brenda couldn’t believe her ears! Bill had a date! Who in t he world would want to go out with him? He wasn’t what you could call… a catch. And with his drinking, he smelled of booze. The woman must be really hard up!

“It’s my mother’s birthday and I’m taking her out for dinner.”

“Wish her happy birthday for me,” Brenda replied. For some reason, the old saying ‘a face that only a mother could love’ kept running through her head.

Brenda finished her drink and headed for the front door.

“Hey Brenda. Leaving so soon?” Danny asked.

“I’m expecting a phone call from my girl friend,” Brenda said.

“Well hurry back when you aren’t meeting with your friend.”

“I’ll do that Danny. See you later.”

“Being a girl is so much fun,” Brenda thought, “No more trying to make it with a girl, having guys chase you was so much more fun. All a girl had to do was look half way decent and men would do anything for you. God I love this.” was her only thought.
 
 
Chapter 17
Tiffany’s day went differently than Brenda’s. Her first assignment was to be in a show at one of the designers that had seen the Voss ad. And they had to have Tiffany! She was the only girl from Universal and the rest were from various agencies around the city. Tiffany arrived early and was resting.

She was approached by a tall Asian girl, who obviously was a model, “Hi,” she said.

“Hi,” Tiffany responded.

“You’re the Voss girl aren’t you?”

“Yes. How did you know?”

“All of us girls know who is who. It’s part of the game.”

“Why would you want to know that?”

“We need to know who the competition is, after all this is our living. Was that your first big spread?”

“Yes.”

“I’ve had dozens like that and it’s always exciting. Congratulations! You’re very pretty too.”

“Thank you. What’s your name?”

“I’m Ginnie Chan.”

“I’m Tiffany Rollins. Pleased to meet you.”

“What agency represents you?”

“Melissa Benson’s. You know, Universal.”

“You’re with Universal? I was with them until a year and a half ago. I got tired of their BS and went to Ford.”

“What BS?”

“You know the drugs and parties? Wait until you’ve been there for a while, you’ll see what I mean.”

“Tell me more, so I know what I’m getting into.”

“I started with them when I was eighteen, and I had more work than I could keep up with. Melissa kept pushing me until I almost had a nervous breakdown. She gave me some pills to take and I felt better but after a while I needed them just to work. I noticed some of the older girls were also taking pills and other drugs and pretty soon they would disappear. I was curious as to what happened to them, and one of the girls told me that they were working as prostitutes, because they needed the drugs and no longer looked good enough to model. She told me that Melissa owned the brothel and this way she had the finest girls turning tricks for her. She gave them enough money to live and an unlimited source of drugs. When I learned this, I quit and went into rehab and haven’t done drugs since.”

“I didn’t think Melissa was like that.”

“She’s a cold hearted bitch. Watch yourself.”

“Thanks Ginnie! Did you ever learn where she got her drugs?”

“No, all that I know is that she had as much as she wanted.”

“Did she have a boyfriend?”

“I don’t think she’s ever had a real boyfriend. She just dates a lot. Come to think of it, I remember her dating a cop and someone said he was married. I’ll bet she makes him give her information about raids and things like that. I don’t think any of her girls have been arrested.”

“Did you know Natalia?”

“Just briefly. She was a really nice girl, I don’t know why she would have been killed. She played around a lot, if you know what I mean. Maybe a jealous boyfriend killed her? Who knows?”

“Girls, let’s go! It’s show time,” shouted the stage manager.

Tiffany went and put on her first outfit: an ugly pair of pants and a blouse covered by a parka. It was hideous! The next outfit was better: it was a pantsuit and she looked rather nice in it. As the show progressed, the clothing looked better, with the pants being replaced with skirts and finally with dresses. She had to model ten outfits and she knew she was running late for her photo shoot.

She took out her cell phone after the last outfit she wore and called Melissa.

“Universal.”

“Hi Brenda, is Melissa in?”

“She had to go out, why?”

“I wanted her to call the photographer and let him know I’m running late.”

“I’ll do that for you.”

“Thanks Brenda! I’ll call you later, I have some news.”

“Okay Tiffany, catch you later!”

Tiffany made it to her photo session and was only fifteen minutes late.

“I’m sorry I’m running late. The show I was just in started late and screwed me up for time.”

“Don’t worry about it Tiffany. We want you even if you are a little late. Let’s go ahead and get started shall we?” the photographer said.

Tiffany was brought to a makeup station and all of her makeup was removed by the attendant. She was then made up again and photographed. The makeup was removed again and then reapplied with different colors. This went on until late evening: makeup on, makeup off, over and over, until Tiffany was sick of makeup.

“That was the last shot Tiffany. Do you want to wear this makeup home or have it removed?” asked the photographer.

“I’ll remove it when I get home,” she answered.

Tiffany didn’t know how good she looked made up the way she was. She was a show stopper! She walked outside and saw the hustle and bustle of New York City at night. She was hungry and the little pizza place looked good. She walked in and ordered a slice. She went to pay for the pizza and felt a hand on her butt.

“Mighty fine,” she heard a voice say.

“Keep your hands to yourself,” she responded.

“Sorry,” said the smarmy man.

Tiffany ignored him and took her pizza to a table and ate it. She didn’t notice the man was still staring at her. She finished and went to catch a cab. The man came up behind her and grabbed her by the shoulder. That was the wrong move because Tiffany turned and grabbed the man and threw him over her shoulder. The defensive training from the FBI had paid off.

“Ouch, “he yelled, “I’m going to sue you!”

A cop walked up and said, “Is this man bothering you miss?”

“Not anymore,” she replied.

“That was a nice move, do you want to press charges against him? I saw the whole thing and was just about to help you myself. But I can see you can take care of yourself.”

“Thank you officer. I’m fine and you might as well let the creep go, I think he learned his lesson.”

A cab stopped and Tiffany got in and she heard cheering from the crowd that had seen her throw the man, “My kind of woman,” they yelled.

Tiffany smiled. ”If you only knew,” she thought.

It was almost midnight by the time Tiffany arrived home. It was too late to call Brenda now and what she would tell her could wait until the next day.

Brenda was waiting for Tiffany to arrive. She wondered why she hadn’t phoned her the night before.

Tiffany came in a half of an hour late.

“You didn’t call me last night!” Brenda stated.

“I didn’t get home until almost midnight and what I found out wasn’t that important. Since it was so late, I figured it could wait. What about you?’

“I’ll talk to you tonight.”

“Okay.”

Mario arrived minutes later.

“Hey, I have a package for you!”

“For me?”

“Yeah, from some woman named Maria Gomez.”

“From Maria? Thank God!”

“Sign here. I’ll see you for lunch. I hope you didn’t forget?”

“Damn, I did! I have a doctor’s appointment at noon. I’m sorry for that, but we still can have dinner together.”

“That works for me! I’ll see you after work.”

Brenda had forgotten her appointment with the doctor and remembered it when she saw the package from Maria! She tore it open and saw the new breast forms staring at her. “Blessed Relief!” she thought, “my cups runneth over… and they really hurt!”

Brenda went to the ladies room and removed her bra and old forms. They looked huge compared to the new ones, but she knew her breasts would feel better with the new ones. She inserted them into her bra and hooked the back. Brenda let out a sigh! She felt normal again!

In the box was a note.

Dear Brenda, when you asked for new smaller forms I knew you must be growing. I take it you want to become a woman, congratulations and welcome to the club. By the way, if these grow too tight, buy a bigger bra, giggle, giggle, love Maria.

Brenda felt warm toward Maria. She was, after all, her creation. And now, Brenda was carrying it to fruition.

Brenda went to her doctor and was examined by him.

“You’re growing very nicely Brenda. You’re almost an A cup!”

“How big am I going to get?”

“That depends on your family, is your mother very large?”

“Not really, she’s maybe a B. She’s very athletic though.”

“That has nothing to do with her breast size. If that’s the case, you might have already reached your potential breast size already.”

“But I want to be as big as I am right now,” she whined.

“I’m sorry but that won’t happen unless you have implants.”

“Implants? Isn’t that kind of permanent?”

“Your high dosages of hormones are kind of permanent too. They have done more damage than implants will ever do.”

“If I decide to have them, when could it be done?”

“With the hormones you’ve been taking, you have enough breast tissue now as long as you don’t go too big. You know, like some of those double D jobs.”

“Umm no. I just want to look normal, like I do now. I think C would be plenty.”

“We can do this at anytime, so when you make your decision, let me know.”

“I will. And thank you doctor.”

“Why are you thanking me?”

“For being so kind and not passing judgment on me for wanting this thing.”

“Why would I pass judgment? The FBI did this to you, and if being a woman is what you want, then I’m here to do whatever you wish…even the final sacrifice.”

“Sacrifice?”

“You know… the operation: cutting your dick and balls off.”

“That sounds so crude.”

“I’m sorry. I guess I shouldn’t have put it that way. I’m just not used to having a healthy man ask me for breasts.”

“I’m not a man anymore - I’m a woman with the wrong thing between my legs. Someday, that will be fixed. I know I’m making the right decision!”

“I hope so Brenda. I truly hope so.”

Brenda finished the day and returned home to dress for Mario. She decided on a skirt and sweater and three-inch heels. She kind of liked wearing skirts because she liked her legs to be seen.

Mario arrived and escorted Brenda to the waiting cab. Brenda noticed that Annie hadn’t looked out her door when she and Mario passed by. She would have to check up on her friend. Come to think of it, she hadn’t seen Annie for several days. That wasn’t like Annie at all!

“Where are we going for dinner?” Brenda asked.

“Do you like Chinese?”

“I love Chinese.”

“Good, we’re going to Chinatown for some really good food.”

The cab drove the couple to Chinatown and dropped them off at the address Mario had given to the driver.

“This place is a hole in the wall, but they have the best Chinese food in New York,” he said.

“I wouldn’t know the difference, the only Chinese food I’ve ever had was at a shopping mall, but I liked it.”

The couple found a table and seated themselves. No host here.

Mario handed a well worn menu to Brenda.

“What do you like?” he asked.

“The only thing I’ve ever had was sweet and sour pork and fried rice. Why don’t you pick for me?”

“Are you hungry?”

“Just a little.”

“I’ll order three dishes then. They give you a lot of food here.”

Mario ordered the food and turned his attention to Brenda.

“Have you thought about Sunday dinner with me again? My mom really would like for you to be there.”

“I had a wonderful time last week and I really do want to go again, but I’m afraid of rushing things! You hardly know me!!”

“The only way I’m going to get to know you is by spending time with you.”

“And I want to spend time with you too. I’m having very strong feelings for you and I’m sorry if I seem insecure, but I don’t want to get hurt if this doesn’t work out.”

“Brenda, there are no guarantees in life. Especially with what one person feels for another and I’m in the same boat as you - I don’t want to be hurt either! You know I was just dumped by my old girl friend and I was angry. But then I realized that you were there and I knew you were a much better person than my last girl friend. I worry too, because I’m having these feelings also and I’ve never felt like this so soon. It scares me as much as it does you.”

“Since you feel that way… I guess I can go Sunday.”

“You just made my mother’s day!”

Brenda was falling in love with Mario and she absolutely hated that she had to find out more information about him for the investigation. She abhorred it utterly, and secretly hoped that whatever she would find would ultimately clear him from the list.

“Tell me more about your escape from Columbia. Aren’t you worried that they might still be after you?”

“Why would you ask that?”

“Because, I’ve seen all those movies where the bad guys chase after someone, you know to Europe and all over the place. It has me worried about you.”

“It really isn’t like that. I was betrayed, that’s all. I was just lucky not to have been shot and killed.”

“See, that’s what I mean! I don’t know what I would do if something were to happen to you.”

“Nothing’s going to happen.”

“How can you be so sure?”

“Because those people don’t know where I live and they have no reason to be after me anyway.”

“What about the package they said you took?”

“I didn’t take anything. I had pretty much figured that I was hauling something other than manure, but I also thought it was best that I didn’t ask. What I hadn’t counted on was being stopped by the feds and being asked for the payoff. I never had to do that before and when they asked, I didn’t know what they were talking about. The owner of the truck had always paid whatever it was he paid. I know the feds probably stole whatever I had in the truck and blamed me for it, so I guess a honeymoon in Colombia is out of the question.”

Brenda couldn’t help but laugh at the last remark.

Dinner was served and Brenda loved the meal. She ate things she thought she would never even think of eating: squid and whole steamed fish. It was a lovely dinner.

“Would you like to see a movie?” Mario asked.

“Why don’t we do that this weekend? I’m kind of tired.”

“Are you asking me out?”

“I guess I am,” replied Brenda.

“It’s a date.”

Mario paid for dinner and hailed a cab, bringing Brenda to her home.

“Would you like to come up for a while?” Brenda asked.

“I’d love to. Let me pay the cab real quick.”

Brenda took Mario by the hand as they walked up the stairs into the building. There were no lights showing under Annie’s door. Brenda was becoming really concerned about her friend! Brenda inserted her key, opened the door and turned on the lights.

‘Come on in and make yourself comfortable. I’ll get us something to drink. What would you like?”

“Besides you? What do you have?”

“Some orange juice, coke, or water. Sorry I don’t have any wine or beer.”

“I’ll have some orange juice, please.”

Mario sat down on the sofa to relax. Brenda brought him a glass of juice and then sat down next to him. She wondered how this was going to go. She wanted to be more intimate with Mario and yet, she felt guilty that she did.

She remembered how she had felt when she was Matt, and made out with a girl. At that time, he was rejected, and now, she hated that she might do the same to Mario. All because she didn’t want to have any kind of sexual relations with him, at least, not yet. And mostly for the obvious reason. Remember Brenda, the girl is in charge!

“Is the juice cold enough?”

“It’s perfect. Thank you.”

“May I ask you something Mario?”

“Anything.”

“Would you kiss me?”

Mario didn’t answer. Instead, he took Brenda in his arms and touched her lips to his. Brenda placed her hands around Mario’s neck and pulled him in tight as she felt the strength of his kiss. The longer the kisses lasted, the deeper in love she was falling. Her lips parted and she felt Mario’s tongue enter her mouth. “So intimate and so loving,” she thought, “almost like having sex.” Brenda felt herself being lowered onto the sofa and Mario’s weight pressing against her. Stay in control Brenda! Stay in control! She felt Mario’s hand caressing her breast.

“Please don’t Mario! I’m not ready for that yet. Please?” she said in her softest voice.

Mario pulled his hand away and said, “I’ll only go as far as you want sweetheart, I, I, I love you.”

Mario had said the magic words: I love you. Brenda responded with a deep kiss.

“I love you too,” she said.

Brenda and Mario kissed again with many thoughts swirling around inside Brenda’s head. How can I be objective with Mario? What if he’s lying to me about Colombia? And what am I going to do if he finds out about me? I should have never done this… with him.

“Mario, we have to talk,” Brenda said as their last kiss ended.

“About what sweetheart?”

“Us. Mario, there’s something I have to say to you and I’m not sure if you will like it. But I have to tell you how I feel about something. When I marry, I want to be a virgin. I feel that that’s right for my husband. I wanted to tell you this so you won’t expect anything more from me. I’m sorry if I led you on to thinking you could have more, but I just can’t do it. I hope you will understand.”

Mario hugged Brenda and said, “I’m so lucky to have found a girl like you! You have no idea how many sluts there are these days and to have found a girl with morals! God I love you!”

Brenda felt relief! She no longer had to fear that her secret would be found out. As long as she was able to stay in control.

“I’m going to have to kick you out now. I have to get my beauty sleep.”

“Ok sweetie. Have a goodnight,” Mario said with one last kiss.

The rest of the week was pretty much like the first part of the week for Brenda with the exception that Ralph Larsen paid his customary visit.

“May I help you?” Brenda asked.

“I’m Ralph Larsen and I’m here to see Melissa Benson.”

“Yes Mr. Larsen, I remember you from the last time you were here.”

“Miss Benson, Mr. Larsen is here to see you.”

“Send him in.”

“Miss Benson says to go right on in.”

Brenda noted that he was carrying the same size package as before and wondered what might be inside of it. It was the perfect size for two kilos of drugs. Ralph stayed with Melissa for about an hour before he left. Brenda wished she could be a fly on the wall at times like this.

Melissa came out of her office and her face was flushed.

“Keep next Tuesday open Brenda. I’m having a party to celebrate Tiffany’s success,” Melissa said.

“Yes Melissa. Oh Melissa, who’s Mr. Larsen?”

“Just a friend Brenda, just a friend.”

“If he comes here when you aren’t here, should I sign for his packages?”

“He never comes here unless I’m here. Is that understood?”

“Yes, sorry for asking.”

“I’m sorry for snapping at you Brenda. You didn’t know. Ralph’s a friend and we go way back. Don’t concern yourself with him.”

“Okay.”

Brenda arrived at home and knocked on Annie’s door. She was worried that something had happened to her. The door across the hall opened and Brenda heard a voice ask, “May I help you?”

Brenda turned and saw an elderly black man with white hair and stooped shoulders and said, “I’m looking for Annie. I’m a friend of hers. I live in 3A, upstairs.”

“You must be the new girl. I’m William Washington. I’ve heard you coming and going but haven’t had time to say hi. I’m really making an excuse. My old body just doesn’t move fast enough anymore to get to the door before you are gone.”

Brenda extended her hand and felt the firm grip his hands had, the strength of a man twenty years younger than he looked.

“It’s nice to meet you William. Do you know what happened to Annie?

“She left a couple of days ago. She said she had to go up to Boston because her daughter-in-law had a miscarriage. Is there something I can help you with?”

“No, I was just worried. I think of Annie as a really good friend.”

“We all do. It’s nice to finally meet you Brenda and, if you need anything, just knock on my door.”

“I will and thank you.”

Friday came and Brenda went to lunch and called Bill Cline.

“Bill I need you to investigate Ralph Larsen. I think he’s the drug source.”

“What makes you think that?”

“Because he spends a lot of time with Melissa and the only time he comes here is when she’s here.”

“You may be right. We haven’t been able to find anything on this guy. It's almost like he doesn’t exist.”

“Well keep searching, I know he’s the one. Maybe you should follow him the next time he comes here. At least you will know where he lives.”

“Don’t be a smart ass Brenda! You know we don’t have a lot of field agents.”

“Seriously Bill! I just know he is the one! He won’t be here again for at least three weeks and when he gets here I’ll call you. That way you won’t have a lot of down time.”

“That might work. If what you say is right, then this thing will finally be over.”

Brenda returned to work and found a distraught Tiffany.

“What’s wrong?” Brenda asked.

“I’m so damned tired, and these goddamned guys keep hitting on me!”

“Keep it down Tiffany! Someone will hear! I think I have good news. I think the drug source is Ralph Larsen. It’s going to be a number of weeks before he can be investigated but it won’t be too much longer before this will all be over. Hang in there!”

“I’m trying to Brenda. But you have no idea…no idea, what this is like for me.”

“I think I do! After all we started this thing together.”

“No you don’t! You want to be a girl, or at least you want to enjoy this girl thing. But I HATE IT. I want to be a man again! RIGHT NOW! I’m sorry… but fuck this shit. I’ve HAD IT!”

“Tiffany! I don’t want to be an asshole, but if you screw this thing up now, you can kiss your career goodbye… and mine too!”

“Brenda, I’m different than you. I know what we’re doing and all that. How am I going to explain to my family that I’m a model? A fucking female model?”

“They will never find out, unless you tell them.”

“But my picture was in the paper.”

“Do they take the times?”

“In Minnesota?”

“Exactly! That is what I’m talking about. No one will ever know.”

“I still worry.”

“Don’t. I hate to bring this up, but what about Robert?”

“Robert?”

“Yes Robert. Remember him? The guy you kissed?”

“FUCK HIM! I found out he’s gay and just goes out with girls to make a statement.”

“It sounds as if that bothers you?”

“Why wouldn’t it? A gay guy kissed me… wouldn’t it bother you?”

“Tiffany, sometimes you can be such an ass, think about it! A gay guy kissed you… a desirable woman, not a boy, but you - Tiffany. Did you think that maybe you might be contributing to the delinquency of a gay? After all, you are a woman.”

Tiffany started laughing hysterically, she couldn’t help it. Some minutes later she limply drawled, “Fuck you Matt!”

Tiffany settled down after that and decided that her career was more important than her feelings. If a man bothered her, she could do like the ad says ‘just say no’.

Sunday came and Mario brought Brenda to another Sunday dinner. She made the usual impression on his mother. Mario’s mother wondered why she never learned to cook.

“Your mother never taught you how to cook? Marie asked.

“Are you kidding? My mom thought hamburger helper was a feast.”

“I can’t believe that! A woman that doesn’t know how to cook?”

“I’d be glad to learn,” Brenda said in a soft tone of voice.

“Hey Mario! I want you to bring Brenda by here whenever she wants! I want to teach her how to cook,” Marie yelled into the other room.

“Yes mom!” came the reply.

Marie did teach Brenda some basics this day and every Sunday for months, because Brenda and Mario had become an item. Brenda wasn’t some slut Mario was sleeping with, she was a sweet and wonderful girl. Marie had fallen in love with her as much as Mario had. She just knew that Brenda would make a wonderful daughter-in-law.
 
 

---

 
 
Edited and decrypted from Ancient Scrolls by Sephrena Lynn Miller