Tuesday came and it was party time. Brenda was to co-ordinate the event. There were people from all over the fashion industry wanting to meet the Voss girl.

Runway
Chapter 18: Ouch it Hurts -
by Arecee

Tuesday came and it was party time. Brenda was to co-ordinate the event. There were people from all over the fashion industry wanting to meet the Voss girl.

“I have to meet that girl,” said Jasmine Kurtz from Style magazine. “She’s so hot, we have to have her.”

And so it went, everyone wanted Tiffany. Everyone except Connie, she wanted her drugs and she wasn’t about to let Tiffany spoil her needs.

“What about me?” Connie asked as she grabbed Jasmine’s arm.

“You’re so much yesterday, Tiffany is now, get away!” Jasmine said as she pulled away from Connie.

“She’s new, she’s a bitch, I’m the one everyone wants,” Connie replied.

Connie knew she was on borrowed time, the drugs had taken their toll, but she wasn’t going to give up without a fight. She didn’t want to turn tricks again, but if that’s what she had to do for her coke then maybe she could do it. The last guy was disgusting; but after he was done he left a thousand dollar tip and if that happened every time, well, maybe she could put up with it. There were a lot worse things than being screwed.

“Girl, I hate to tell you this; but the world wants Tiffany, and my magazine does so leave me alone.” Jasmine said, not thinking of the impact it would have on Connie

Connie felt shattered; her world was coming to an end. She was the diva of Universal and now this bitch was taking her place, she had to do something about it. She would talk to Melissa.

“Melissa, may I have a word with you?” Connie asked.

“What about?”

“Tiffany.”

“Come into my office, we need to get some things straight.”

The two women went into Melissa’s office and close the door.

“Okay, what’s up Connie?” Melissa asked.

“It’s Tiffany, I’m the number one model here and everyone is asking for her.”

“I hate to pop your balloon, but you aren’t the number one girl anymore.”

“You can make me number one again, just be done with the whore.”

“You stupid little bitch, do you have any idea of how much money Tiffany is going to make for me? You were a model, straight forward, a model, but Tiffany is a super-star. There are businesses tripping all over themselves to have her, and she doesn’t even know how popular she is, and as far as you are concerned, you work for me. I have another man for you to sleep with tonight because you owe me, I made you popular and I gave you what you desired, and if you want that, sleep with the prick.”

Connie couldn’t believe how blunt Melissa had been. She had come to her as a fresh young girl. Risen above most models as a girl that people thought as being sexy yet innocent, and now she was asking her to sleep with men. She had done it once; but that was because she had too, but now, she was telling her to become a whore, she wasn’t going to do that, no way.

“Fuck you, you bitch. I’ll be damned if I’m going to be a whore for you or anyone else,” Connie spat out.

“That’s fine with me Connie, I’m not worried, if you work for me, you are one, if not, that’s your choice, but remember, when you get sick, I can make you feel better.” Melissa said with a sneer.

Melissa had been though this before, almost all of her girls had said the same thing, ‘fuck you, I’m not going to do this again’, but she knew they all came back for the drugs, scream and yell all you want, but I own you, Melissa thought with a smirk on her face.

The party went well as far as Brenda and Tiffany were concerned, dance, have a drink and mingle. Watch closely, was anyone doing drugs, they didn’t know. Some of the girls would go into Melissa’s office but they didn’t know for sure if anything illegal was taking place, they would have to gain Melissa’s trust before they would be privy to the apparent drug scene taking place in her office.

The weeks past and soon it was a month. Ralph Larsen hadn’t visited yet and Brenda was becoming insecure about her suspicions. Why hadn’t he visited Melissa she wondered?

It was the time of month that all the new magazines came out and the issues were delivered to the office. They were packed in a large bundle by the postal service to facilitate delivery. Brenda cut the binding and separated the issues. She grabbed the issue of Cosmopolitan because of the racy headlines and turned open the cover. There was a full two page add for Revlon cosmetics with photo’s of Tiffany wearing Revlon makeup. She was gorgeous. Tiffany had the quality to draw a person into the photo, you didn’t just look at the picture, she made you become part of the picture, she made you want to buy Revlon cosmetics, it made you want to be her.

Brenda called into Melissa’s office, “Melissa, you have to see this? Tiffany has a two page spread.”

“Two pages, my God, we just hit the jackpot, let me see.”

Brenda brought the magazine into Melissa’s office and placed it on her desk. Melissa opened it excitedly and let out a whoop.

“Let me see the other magazines, I’ll bet our girl is in other ads as well.”

Melissa and Brenda searched the pile of magazines and found Tiffany in several more ads, some obscure and some very prominent, Tiffany was now a star whether she wanted to be or not. Her life was now going to take a very serious turn.

Tiffany wasn’t aware of the release of the photo advertisement and had gone directly to a fashion show from home. It wasn’t until she was finished working the runway did she become aware that something was amiss.

“Are you Tiffany Rollins?” asked a woman.

“Yes,” she answered.

“Would you sign this for me?” she asked excitedly, while she handed Tiffany a copy of the Revlon add.

Tiffany took the magazine and pen from the lady and saw her picture for the first time and gasped, “Oh my God, it’s me.” Tiffany signed the advertisement and handed it back to the woman.

“Miss, would you sign this for me?”

“Tiffany, please?” came another request.

Bedlam was breaking out and Tiffany didn’t know what to do except sign her autograph. A hundred signatures later she was able to get away from the throng and find a taxi to Universal.

Tiffany entered the offices.

“Tiffany, did you see it, you’re in Cosmo, God, you look good,” Brenda said.

“I saw it when a woman asked me to autograph it for her.”

“I couldn’t believe my eyes when I saw it, what did you think when you saw it?”

“I couldn’t believe it was me, and then people started asking me for my autograph and then I knew, it was me.”

“The phone hasn’t stopped ringing, everyone wants you for their promotions, you’re going to be famous.”

“I don’t want to be famous, I just want to finish what we came here to do.”

“Aren’t you excited just a little bit?”

“Maybe a little, is Melissa in?”

“Yes, she’s on the phone with Lexus, something about using you for a shoot.”

“I’m going to get a drink in the break room, let her know I’m here when she’s done.”

Tiffany went to rest and Ron came through the door.

“Got to check the air balance,” he stated, “Is Tiffany in?”

“What’s Tiffany got to do with the air balance?”

“She was so hot looking in that photo that she’s going to make the building sizzle.”

“Ron, you’re out there, she’s in the break room.”

It was hard to imagine that Ron’s brother was in prison for drug possession, Ron seemed to be a nice guy, but looks can be deceiving. If it weren’t for Ralph Larsen he would be a suspect. As fate may have it Ralph walked through the door.

“Good morning Brenda, is Melissa busy?” he asked.

Brenda’s heart jumped with excitement, maybe now they would find out more about Ralph Larsen.

“Good morning Mr. Larsen, I’ll see if she can see you, she’s been very busy this morning. Melissa, Ralph Larsen is here to see you and Tiffany just came in,” she said into the phone.

“Send Ralph in, Tiffany can wait,” she responded.

“Melissa said to go on in, Mr. Larsen.”

“Thanks Brenda, you look nice today by the way.”

“Thank you sir.”

Brenda grabbed her cell phone and called Bill Cline.

“Bill Cline.”

“He’s here, he’s here,” Brenda whispered excitedly.

“Who is this?”

“It’s Brenda, and Ralph Larsen is in seeing Melissa.”

“Good, I’ll have someone there in half of an hour to follow him, maybe now we will get some answers, thanks Brenda.”

“You’re welcome, let me know when you find something.”

“You’ll be the first to know.”

Ralph stayed his usual hour before he exited Melissa’s office. He left the package he was carrying and exited empty handed.

“See you next month Ralph,” Melissa said from her office door. She was flushed looking again. “Brenda, would you send Tiffany in please?”

Brenda went to the lunchroom and told Tiffany that Melissa wanted to see her.

Tiffany entered Melissa’s office and she asked Tiffany to close the door.

“Tiffany, you won’t believe the excitement your ad in Cosmo is creating, everyone wants you. Lexus wants you for a nationwide ad. In addition to still photos they want to shoot a video staring you. Several other cosmetic companies have expressed interest in you also; but before I allow you to be in their ads, I want to wait for Revlon to make you an offer to be theirs exclusively. If they do, which I think will happen, you will become a very rich young lady.”

“I have a lot of work for you and I need you to take care of your health. If you feel tired I can give you something to get you over the hump, just ask. Now run along and get some rest, you have two shows tomorrow and a photo shoot tomorrow night. The next day you have one show, but there is a party for you to attend and you will be modeling some spring fashions as a preview of the upcoming show, is there anything I can help you with?”

“What am I supposed to do with all the people asking for autographs?”

“Give them one unless you want to be known as a prima-donna; or a conceited bitch and that will kill your career faster than it started, give your fans what they want, a little piece of you.”

“I’ll try, it’s kind of exciting being wanted like that.”

“Enjoy it Tiffany, it doesn’t last forever.”

Tiffany exited Melissa’s office and Brenda asked if everything was okay.

“Everything is perfect. Call me later at home, I’m going to get some rest.”

Brenda had her doctor’s appointment that afternoon and had some questions about her breast development.

“Doctor, how much longer is it going to take before my breasts grow as large as I want them to be?”

“You stated that you wanted C cup breasts didn’t you?”

“Yes.”

“As I recall you also told me your mother wasn’t much above average size.”

“Yes that’s correct, what does that have to do with me?”

“You’re a man; and try as you may; you’re only going to be a size or more less than your mother. That’s why I suggested implants, that way you can be any size you want.”

“My breasts have stopped hurting as much as they did, does that mean they’ve stopped growing?”

“Probably so.”

“If I have the implants how long will it take to heal?”

“It will take two weeks for the swelling to go down and you will be able to wear a regular bra. The bruising takes longer to disappear but it won’t be noticeable unless you remove your bra. It takes around six weeks for everything to return to normal, but the first two weeks are the most important.”

“If I decide, when could I have it done?”

“You’re a special case; the government owes you so if you wanted them now I could make the arrangements.”

Brenda sat silently thinking, it’s so permanent and what if I change my mind later, then what, what am I thinking, I want to be a woman and I want breasts, the hell with it.

“I’ll do it doctor, when can it be done?”

“You name the day and I’ll make it happen.”

“Can I have it done this Friday?”

“If you would like.”

“Will I be able to return to work Monday?”

“Most likely, just be careful.”

“I’ll see you Friday,” she said excitedly.

Brenda returned to work and finished the day fielding a raft of phone calls, most of which were about Tiffany.

Brenda arrived at home and noted that Annie’s lights still weren’t on, something serious must have happened to her daughter-in-law she thought.

Brenda called Tiffany, they had to talk.

“Hello,” Tiffany answered.

“Hi, it’s me, so what’s up?”

“Nothing much except Melissa offered me something to help me if I get tired.”

“Good, take her up on it, just don’t take it. Has she said anything to you about Ralph Larsen?”

“No, but I noticed a package on her desk and one end was torn and I saw some pill bottles inside.”

“I knew it, I just know he’s the source of her drugs. They have a tail on him now so it won’t be long before this is all over. Has Ron said anything to you?”

“Just the same dumb ass shit he always says, when are you going to go out with me, you know stuff like that.”

“I would ask you to go out with him but since Ralph’s the bad guy we don’t have to worry anymore.”

“I wouldn’t go out with him no matter what.”

“Why not, it would have been for the agency.”

“Yuk, you know how I feel about all this.”

“What about your new popularity/”

“I’m having trouble with that, it’s exciting to be so much in demand, but I don’t know,” Tiffany pondered, “I’ll have to see how it works out.”

“Okay, I’ll see you tomorrow.”

The next day the letters started to pour in and most of them were addressed to Tiffany.

Mario came in as usual and Brenda greeted him cheerfully.

“Hi, what’s a good looking guy like you doing in a neighborhood like this?” she asked.

“Looking for the love of my life, you haven’t seen her have you?”

“Umm, not really,” she giggled. “Look at these letters for Tiffany, can you believe it, two bundles of them.”

“Ever since that ad, she’s all anyone talks about, how’s she handling all this?”

“I’m not sure, I don’t think she’s ready for the big time just yet.”

“Well at least none of these packages are for her. Could you sign for them, I have a lot of deliveries today.”

Brenda signed the board and Mario was on his way. Damn, I forgot to tell him I might not be able to see him this weekend depending on how the surgery goes, I’ll just have to see how I feel afterward, she thought.

Tiffany arrived and Brenda handed her the letters.

“What is this?” she asked.

“Letters from your fans.”

“What am I supposed to do with them?”

“You read them and answer them, it will give you something to do between assignments.”

“But there’s so many,” she whined.

“Then you’d better start reading,” giggled Brenda.

“Will you help me, please?” Tiffany groveled.

“Okay, you take half and give me the rest, I’ll do what I can.”

The girls each took one bundle and started opening letters and reading them. Brenda suggested that they make several different piles, one for people asking for money, one for the sicko’s asking for sex, and one for fans that just want to say hi, the star struck ones. When they were finished the third pile had the least amount of letters, which made it easy for Tiffany to respond. She would ignore the other stacks not wanting to acknowledge the perverted suggestions from some sick creep, and she could use the money herself, she hadn’t even received any royalties yet. Tiffany sent a thank you note to the rest with an autographed picture and decided this really wasn’t as bad as she thought it would be.

Brenda asked Melissa to excuse her Friday for personal reasons.

“Call a temp agency and have them send someone over to cover for you. The way things are going with Tiffany, I’ll need someone on the phones.”

“I will, and thank you Melissa,” Brenda said.

Everything was arranged, all she had to do was call the doctor for instructions and poof, she would have boobs.

“Doctor this is Brenda, I need to know what I’m supposed to bring on Friday and anything else I need to know?” she asked.

“You’ll need a good bra when we remove your dressings, not one of those lacy little things, but one that will support you. You will need to have a friend help you home afterward. Don’t eat anything after eight the night before, and don’t take any aspirin or pain killers until after surgery because they keep your blood from clotting. Be here at seven so you can be prepped, are you sure you really want to do this? You can still change you mind.”

“The more I’ve thought about it the more I want to do it, I’ll see you Friday,” Brenda said.

“Not really, I don’t do the surgery, we have an expert do it, actually he’s the best, you’re lucky, I’ve seen some botched jobs and I’ve seen what he does, you would hardly even know they weren’t real,” he said.

“Thank you for all you’re doing doctor,” Brenda said.

“It’s the least we can do for you Brenda, you’re the one that’s put your life on the line.”

“I’m an agent, that’s what we do,” Brenda said.

“You’ve done more than that Brenda, you’ve changed sex for us and we’ll be forever in your debt for that,” he said.

“I should be the one to thank you, goodbye doctor,” Brenda said as she lowered the phone.

Everything was pretty straight forward, don’t eat, don’t take any medicine and bring a friend, what friend, Brenda didn’t have any friends that she wanted to tell about the surgery. She couldn’t tell Tiffany or Annie about this and certainly not Mario, she had to call someone, but who?

Brenda heard the voice answer the phone.

“Hello.”

“Ashley?”

“Yes.”

“Ashley, I don’t know if you remember me, this is Brenda, you did my hair a little while back?”

“Brenda, of course I do, do you need me to fix your hair again?” she asked.

“Well yes, but that’s not why I called you, I need a really big favor from you.”

“What’s that?”

“I’m having surgery Friday and I need someone to help me get home afterward.”

“What kind of surgery?”

“I’m getting a boob job.”

“Do you mean that wasn’t all you when we met?”

“God no, I wish it was so I wouldn’t have to do this now.”

“Well don’t worry, it’s not that bad, I had mine done a couple of years ago and I’d be more than happy to help you. I’ll bring my things and might as well work on your hair after you get home. You won’t want to do anything for a couple of days anyway.”

“Thanks so much Ashley, I’ll call you tonight with the address, I’ll talk to you later.”

Brenda called Ashley that night and gave her the address of the clinic and went to bed.

Thursday was pretty much like the previous day, except that the quantity of letters to Tiffany had increased fourfold, she was becoming overwhelmed.

Mario came with his delivery and Brenda asked him if they could have lunch together.

“Sure, is there anything wrong?”

“No, I just have to talk to you about something, I’ll see you at lunch.”

Mario came and escorted Brenda to a nearby restaurant for something to eat and to talk.

“Mario, I can’t see you this weekend,” Brenda said.

“Why not?” he asked.

“I have some things to take care of and this weekend would be best time for me, I hope you understand?” she said.

“I’m fine with that, we are just, well we are, how can I say this without being too forward, I think we are lovers.”

“We are even though we haven’t done the thing, you know what I mean?” Brenda asked innocently.

“I know. Look, I understand, if you need some time alone, I’m okay with that, have some fun, it’s not like I don’t want to spend some time with my friends too.”

“It’s not that, I don’t know, God I’m being such an airhead.”

“Come here,” Mario said and spread his arms. He gave Brenda a hug that said I love you and don’t be so insecure.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t know how you would feel if I didn’t go to dinner on Sunday and not spend time with you,” Brenda said, her insecurities showing.

“If we don’t get away now and then we’ll smother each other, go have fun but remember that I love you.”

“I love you too.”

Mario and Brenda kissed and Brenda felt better about missing the Sunday family function.

Friday came and Brenda’s alarm rang, it was five AM. This was earlier than usual for her, but she had to shower and be at the clinic by seven. Brenda savored her shower. This would be the last until the doctor told her she could take one again. She felt the water caressing her breasts, it felt good and even though they weren’t big they were very sensitive. I hope they feel this good after the operation she thought. Brenda finished her shower and dressed, no sense wearing my forms anymore, I won’t need them and threw them in the drawer.

Brenda wore a loose pair of sweats so she would be comfortable after the operation. She packed her bag and departed. When she reached the bottom of the stairs Annie opened her door.

“Brenda, hi, I’m sorry I haven’t had time to see you since I returned from Boston. You’re off early, aren’t you working today?”

“No I have something to do and took the day off from work. I have to meet a girl friend later and she might stay with me this weekend, if that’s alright?”

“Of course it is, there’s no rule against having guests now and then, it’s nice to see you Brenda, I’ll talk to you later and tell you all about Boston.”

“Okay, I’ll see you later Annie.”

Brenda caught the subway to the clinic and entered five minutes early.

“May I help you?” asked the duty nurse.

“I’m Brenda Watson and I’m here for, well you know?”

Brenda felt embarrassed. She knew the nurse knew why she was here, that was because her vanity had won over her practical side and she wanted larger breasts. The nurse could see her discomfort.

“Brenda, we’ve been expecting you, you’re a lucky girl, Dr. Branson is the best at these procedures, you’ll be beautiful when he’s done. Did you follow your instructions for today?”

“Yes, I haven’t had anything to eat since yesterday.”

“Perfect, go into that room and remove all your clothing, put on the smock hanging inside the door and come back out so I can listen to your heart and take your blood pressure.”

“Yes, nurse.”

“Call me Gloria, sweetheart.”

“Thanks Gloria.”

Brenda entered the room and removed all her clothing and put the smock on. She felt a chill as the air blew through the opening in the rear. She felt her nipples become hard as the cool air caressed them. Her hands felt the two small bumps where her new breasts would be inserted. Even though she had small breasts, they were breasts, woman’s breasts and she felt pleased.

Gloria examined Brenda and then was asked to lie on a gurney, an IV was inserted into her arm and she rested until the doctor arrived.

“Good morning Brenda, I’m Dr. Branson, are you ready for your big day?”

“Yes,” Brenda said.

Dr. Branson was a thin man and not much taller than Brenda. His hair was thinning and Brenda noted that he had a gentle manner about him when he shook her hand.

“We might as well get started then. We’re going to put you under, I’m sure you don’t want to watch and I’ll make an incision below each nipple and then I’ll insert your implants. They have approved silicone implants so I’m going to use those instead of saline because the results are better and feel more natural. This won’t take long, a little over an hour and you will be able to go home this afternoon. Are you ready for your nap?”

Brenda liked Dr. Branson, even though he wasn’t a big man he had a confident air about him that made her relax and she knew she would be in good hands.

“I’m ready.”

Gloria injected a solution into the IV tube.

“Count backwards from one hundred Brenda,” she said.

“One hundred, ninety nine, ninety eight, ninety sem, niinet,”

“Brenda, Brenda, how do you feel?”

Who’s voice was that, I’m sleeping, yuk, there’s drool running from my mouth, can’t move my arms, why does my chest feel heavy, let me sleep.

“Brenda wake up, it’s all over, everything went fine.”

It’s that voice again, leave me alone, can’t you see I’m sleeping, what do you mean everything went fine. Brenda opened one eye and then the other and saw the bright fluorescent tubes above her head on the ceiling. What am I doing here and where is here?

“Wake up Brenda, how do you feel?”

“Argh, I feel terrible,” she croaked.

“Sip this water, your throat is dry.”

Brenda sipped the water through a straw and felt the cool liquid comfort her parched throat.

“Thank you, I’m tired, I want to sleep,” Brenda whined.

“It’s the anesthesia wearing off, you’ll be fine in a little while, how do you feel?”

“Like someone beat me up,” she groaned.

“You’ll feel better in a little while, but you’re going to be sore until everything is healed.”

“My breasts, how did they come out.”

“They’re beautiful.”

“When can I see them?”

“Not until next week when we remove your bandages.”

“When can I go home?”

“In a couple of hours, you’ll need someone to take you though.”

“My friend Ashley is coming for me.”

“Okay, why don’t you rest until then.”

Brenda rested but didn’t sleep. She wondered what in the world she just did to herself, had she lost her mind? How was she going to hide these things on her chest, they couldn’t be put in the drawer like her forms, these were part of her now. Had she really thought this whole thing through or did she have this done without a rational thought in her head, was she becoming a bimbo that wanted big boobs? She giggled at that thought, no, or she would have had those double D’s implanted, she just wanted to feel like a normal woman with a normal body, and what’s wrong with wanting to look good in a tank top?

“Brenda, how do you feel?”

Brenda recognized Ashley’s voice.

“Sore, but better.”

“Your nurse says you can go after the doctor looks at you.”

“Good, I’m ready to get out of here, I want to go home.”

Dr. Branson came in and greeted Brenda.

“How’s my best patient doing?”

“Fine, Dr. this is Ashley, she’s here to take me home.”

“It’s nice to meet you Ashley, would you mind stepping out of the room for a minute so I can look at Brenda?”

“Sure, I’ll be right out side.”

Dr. Branson Lifted Brenda’s gown and removed her dressings and examined his handy work.

“Very nice, everything looks beautiful. Brenda, I’m going to wrap you now and I don’t want you to remove the bandages until I see you next week. After that you will be able to wear a bra. I’m going to prescribe some pain killers in case you become too uncomfortable, but only use them if you can’t bear the pain, see you next week.”

“Thank you doctor.”

Gloria came in and helped Brenda dress and then she left with Ashley in a cab. They were dropped of in front of Brenda’s apartment.

Brenda opened the door and the two girls went up to Brenda’s apartment. Brenda opened the door and they went inside.

“Wow, you have a nice place,” stated Ashley

“Thanks, make yourself at home, I told my landlady you would be here until Sunday so if you meet a woman named Annie, don’t be surprised if she asks you lots of questions.”

“Thanks for the warning, I’m a little hungry do you have anything to eat?”

“In the refrigerator, do you mind if I lie down, I don’t feel very good.”

“That’s the anesthesia wearing off, drink some water and go rest, I can look after myself.”

“Thanks Ashley, you’re a true friend.”

Brenda went to her bed and laid down and was soon fast asleep. She was dreaming and talking in her sleep. She woke four hours later and her stomach was growling, she was hungry. She could hear the television in the other room.

“Ashley?”

“Brenda, you’re awake, how do you feel?” Ashley asked, as she walked into the room

“I’m hungry and my chest hurts a little.”

“Let me fix something for you, maybe some soup, you shouldn’t eat anything too heavy just yet.”

“That sounds good, I feel so much better now that I’ve rested, did I snore?”

“No, but you talked a lot.”

“I hope I wasn’t swearing.”

“No silly, but you kept talking about some guy named Matt. You kept saying you were sorry about something, I couldn’t quite make it out, who’s Matt, a rejected boyfriend?”

Oh God, what can I say to Ashley, I can’t let her know I’m Matt, she would never understand, what am I going to say to her, think Brenda think.

“Brenda, did you tell him you were a boy, is that what happened?” Ashley asked.

Brenda turned white and lay back down on the bed, how did she know I’m a boy, she must have peeked, fuck I’m so screwed she thought.

“Brenda, are you all right, what’s wrong?” Ashley asked with obvious concern in her voice.

Brenda was finally able to answer, “You know?”

“I know what?”

“That I’m a boy, how, how did you find out?”

“I knew when I did your hair the first time we met. When I washed your hair and it was pulled back I could tell by the shape of your head, there was something masculine about it. No one would notice except someone like me, we become quite expert at it.”

“I didn’t think anyone could tell.”

“It was hard even for me, you’re very pretty and extremely feminine so I wouldn’t worry, now who’s Matt?”

“I’m Matt, or I was at one time.”

“Why were you apologizing to him?”

“I don’t know, maybe because I had this done to myself, I really don’t know,” Brenda answered, wistfully.

“There’s no reason to feel bad about this, you’re just becoming the girl you have always wanted to be.”

“It’s not quite that simple Ashley, I didn’t even know about being a girl until nine months ago,” Brenda said.

“Do you mean you never thought about being a girl before that?”

“No, all I ever thought about was surfing, then I got this job and I had to become a girl for it.”

“That doesn’t make sense, you became a girl so you could work as a receptionist, you could have done that as a male,” Ashley said.

“There’s more to it than that. You had better sit down, because I have a lot to tell you.”

Ashley sat and Brenda started at the beginning.

“Ashley, you have to swear to secrecy about what I’m about to tell you.”

“I won’t tell anyone, I promise.”

“You can’t tell anyone, not even your mother or I could be killed.”

“I promise Brenda, what are you a member of the mob or something?”

“No, just the opposite, I’m an FBI agent and this started as part of a disguise.”

“A disguise, who in the world would make a guy become a girl as part of a disguise, that’s sick.”

“It wasn’t supposed to go this far, I was supposed to look like a girl and that was it, but it became more than that with me. After I trained to look and act like a girl, I found that I wanted to really be one and that I don’t want to be a man again, is that wrong?” Brenda asked.

“You’re asking the wrong person that question, or maybe you haven’t noticed that I haven’t finished myself yet, tell me how this all started.”

“I just graduated from the academy and saw a notice about an undercover assignment in New York and applied for it. I didn’t know it was for a girl and as a prank they made me up to look like one. The director saw what the guys had done to me and thought it was a good idea using a man instead of a woman, so they trained me to look and act like a girl.”

“The only problem was that I wasn’t feminine looking, so they started me on hormones with the reassurance that it could be reversed if I didn’t take them for too long. After several months my body started changing and so did my brain. I liked what was happening to me, it was exciting feeling myself changing into a woman. I liked it so much that I decided to become a woman. I wanted bigger breasts and that’s why I did what I did, you don’t think I’m making a mistake do you?”

“Brenda, I’m not saying you made a mistake, but it is a big step from wearing some makeup to having implants, we need to talk more about this. I know this may sound silly but did you ever dress up like a girl when you were young, or at least want to?”

“No, why would I want to do that? If I did my brothers would have killed me.”

“Because it would show that you wanted to be a girl all your life. When I was young I couldn’t wait to get into my mothers clothes. I hated playing with boys and loved playing with girls, there were a lot of things that were different about me and why I am who I am today, I’ve always wanted to be a girl, I just don’t understand why you would want to become one?”

“I don’t know either; I just know it’s what I want. Maybe it’s because when I do something I do it one hundred percent and I love an adventure. It was like surfing, things start out small but as your confidence grows, so do the waves and you have to make a decision as to whether you want to risk your life by riding a wave that can easily kill you. I have always ridden that wave and have nearly died doing it, but I go back and try again and that’s what this has been like for me.”

“When this started I wanted to be the best girl I could be. I didn’t think about what might happen to my manhood, I just kind of put it away and figured I would get it back when I wanted it, but I was wrong about that. After I had been on the hormones for a while I noticed my body was changing, it was getting soft and a little curvy, and I felt delicate. I had lost weight and yet I felt fat so I worked on my waist, you know sit-ups and things like that and it grew smaller. I didn’t get that six-pack of muscle but a cute waist. It made my hips look curvier and when I saw the result I wanted to try even harder to look like a girl.”

“I thought the hormones were only doing things to my body but they were changing how I thought. I’ve always been an emotional person, you know laugh or get angry but one day I started crying for the smallest reason. I can’t even remember why, all I know was that I couldn’t stop. After that day I felt different about what I had done, I felt like I was a young girl. Gone was the surfer dude. He had been replaced by a girl entering puberty. I would look in the mirror and see that my hair wasn’t as long as I wished it was, or my makeup wasn’t perfect, I couldn’t make my mind up as to what I should wear, all the things young girls worry about.”

“One day in the shower I noticed my breasts felt different, they were very sensitive and they hurt. I didn’t know at the time they were starting to bud so I didn’t say anything to anyone. If I had they probably would have cut back on my hormones. When I saw the first swelling I got excited, not sexually but as a girl that’s finally making the big step into womanhood, I was growing breasts. It was at that time the agency wanted to stop the hormones and I decided against it and asked that they increase the dosage. I had signed a paper that said if anything happened during this experiment, they would pay for whatever costs were involved and I couldn’t lose my job if something happened that couldn’t be reversed.”

“I think the day that pushed me over the edge was the last day we were in training. We went to a nightclub to find out what having men chase after you was like. My teacher said there is nothing like the real thing to find out so we went dancing. Guys were all over us, buying drinks for us, dancing and flirting, it was a rush. I had always been the pursuer before but now I was being pursued and I liked the feeling. I was naíve of course and being like a young girl didn’t know the bounds and had my first kiss from a man. I thought I would be repulsed but found it flattering to be wanted as a woman. That was when I made up my mind that I really did want to be a woman and here I am, almost there,”

“Wow Brenda, you don’t know how lucky you are to have that kind of arrangement. You’ve done in nine months what has taken me years to do. I’m still worried though that you have done things too hastily and now a lot of it can’t be reversed,” Ashley said.

“Ashley, I know how I feel about all this and I love what I’ve done, it’s like being born all over again.”

“Of course it’s exciting, I remember when I started becoming a woman and the curves came, I remember that, but I also remember the sad times like with my sister and when I told my mother of my wishes to become a woman, which was the hardest day of my life. We talked and cried, we yelled at each other and held one another, it was a day I’ll never forget.”

“Why is your sister so angry with you?”

“I thought it was because her boyfriend liked me, you know, it was obvious that he wanted me as a girl and my sister saw that. She felt threatened and even after she broke up with the guy she hated me because guys would pay more attention to me than her when I was around. I didn’t want anything to do with guys back then; I just wanted to be a girl. I’ve dated a lot of guys but when they find out about me they pretty much don’t want anything to do with me. This is a lonely life Brenda and when girls like us find friends it’s like finding a diamond, you pull it to your heart and never let go.”

“What if people never find out about you?”

“Someone will always know, you can’t just disappear. What about your family, what do they think about all of this, have you told them?”

“I told my mom when this all started, she thought it was a howl and that I would learn to appreciate women more.”

“Umm, and did you tell her that you were going to get implants?”

“No.”

“Why not if she knows you’re living as a woman?”

“She thinks it’s temporary.”

“What are you going to tell her now; you’ve kind of gone beyond temporary?”

“I don’t know Ashley, I didn’t think of that, God I really screwed up didn’t I?”

Brenda’s eyes filled with tears, she didn’t know how she should feel at this moment, she felt so stupid for doing what she had just done, and now she was stuck with those things on her chest and they hurt.

“Brenda, you didn’t screw up, you just did things differently. You should have discussed this with her before you had the implants but you can do it anytime now, it won’t change anything. Before you take the final step though, you really should seek some guidance.”

Ashley had moved to Brenda and held her as she cried; she knew how she felt at this moment. She felt alone.

“Enough of feeling sorry for yourself Brenda, let me play with your hair, it will make you feel better,” Ashley said.

“What are you going to do to it?”

“What ever I feel like doing, now sit.” Ashley ordered and pointed at a chair.

Brenda did as she was told and Ashley started on Brenda’s hair. She brushed and tugged and pulled trying style after style all the time giggling at the results. Brenda was feeling more at ease and Ashley was happy to have found a friend.

The girls went to bed and slept until mid morning and wouldn’t have woke up except Brenda’s chest hurt. She got up and took some pain medication, something she wouldn’t have done as Matt.

Ashley opened her eyes and saw that her friend was missing from the bed.

“Brenda, are you here?” she asked.

“I’m in the bathroom, I needed something for the pain.”

“God, look what time it is, let’s do something today.”

“Like what?”

“We could go shopping.”

“I can’t like this, not all bandaged up.”

“Sure you can, we’ll just look and if were lucky we’ll find something to show off your new babies,” Ashley giggled.

Brenda and Ashley spent the day shopping and Brenda did find something to wear when everything was healed.

The weekend past quickly and soon it was back to the same old routine, work and snoop.

The days past and Brenda found her way back to the doctors for her first checkup. The pain had pretty much disappeared and she felt great. It was going to be her first glimpse of what she had done.

“Hi. Brenda, how are you feeling?” asked Dr. Branson.

“I feel wonderful now that I can have these bandages removed.”

“Let’s remove them and see how you’re healing.”

The doctor removed the bandages and turned Brenda toward a mirror so she could see.

Brenda gasped, they were beautiful, a little bruised but beautiful, now she looked like a woman.

“Oh Dr. Branson, they’re beautiful, I don’t know what to say,” as her eyes filled with tears of happiness.

“Just a thank you would suffice.”

“Thank you, thank you,” she exclaimed.

“Did you bring your bra with you?” he asked.

“Yes, the one you told me to wear.”

“Good. Make sure you keep it on except when you bathe, and don’t use any other type for the next week. After that you are on your own, just be careful until you are completely healed.”

“I will.”

Brenda pulled her industrial strength bra around her new breasts and hooked the back. This felt completely different from her old bra and forms she wore, she now needed it for support. She felt it lift her up and it made her feel womanly. It felt sensual as it rubbed the new flesh of her mounds.

Brenda dressed and returned to work, then wondered what it would feel like if Mario was to caress them. She just smiled.

Brenda couldn’t wait to get home, she could finally shower and wash a weeks worth of yuk off her body.

As soon as she entered the door, off came the clothes and on went the water in the shower. The water temperature was finally just right and she entered. The water cascaded over her body caressing every inch with loving cleanliness. Brenda took the soap in hand and lathered her body feeling the dirt wash away. She soaped her new breasts and looked down at them and marveled at how pretty they were. She softly washed them with the soap taking care not to rub too hard, they were still very tender but she could sense the new erotic feelings from her nipples. She put her head back and let the water pour over her now erect nipples, ‘God I love being a woman’ she thought to herself. Only one more thing to do before I’m perfect she thought as she took her flaccid penis in hand, change this.

Brenda and Mario went out to dinner and a movie Saturday and went to the traditional dinner at Mario’s mothers on Sunday. She had become one of the women now and they had missed her the week before. Brenda was becoming concerned that her relationship with Mario was becoming too much like a marriage. She was also concerned about the investigation; and if Mario had any connection to the drug thing. She felt sure that Ralph Larsen was the only one involved other than Melissa, but one could never be too sure.

Monday morning Brenda called Bill Cline from home and left a message on his voice mail.

“Bill this is Brenda Watson. I was wondering if you had any information yet on Ralph Larsen, I’d kind of like to end this thing as soon as possible, give me a call and maybe we can get together after work.”

Brenda dressed and went to work. Walking and doing things was a new experience with her breasts, she could feel them quiver with every step and she liked the feeling it gave her, one of femininity.

All the usual suspects came by and left, with the exception of Ron, he was missing today.

“Tiffany, have you seen Ron?” Brenda asked.

“No, and why would I want to see that pervert?”

“Come on, he’s not that bad.”

“You don’t have him starring at you all day, maybe we should change places.” Tiffany growled.

“Well, didn’t we wakeup on the wrong side of the bed this morning?”

“If you had my weekend you would feel the same way.”

“Why, what happened?”

“The same thing as every other day, I can’t go anywhere with out people touching me and asking for autographs, I hate it.”

“It’s not that bad is it?”

“How would you like it guys kept whistling at you and making crude remarks, they’re such pigs.”

“You sound just like a woman,” whispered Brenda, “I wouldn’t mind.”

“Wait until it happens to you, you’ll see. The worse was some guy that wouldn’t take no for an answer, he kept bugging me to go out with him and I finally said yes, yuk.”

“You went out with a guy?”

“Yes, at least he took me to a nice place for dinner, but after he wanted more. I almost had to hit him before he got the hint that I wouldn’t do anything with him.”

“Are you going to see him again?”

“I hope not, you know how I feel about all this, you and I are like night and day. You really like all this, don’t you Brenda?’

“I love it. I’m just curious, have you talked to Ron at all about what’s going on?” Brenda asked.

“A little, he either doesn’t know or he’s just playing stupid.”

“Why don’t you see if he’ll go out with you and then maybe he will open up to you.”

“Go out with Ron, you’ve got to be kidding, in the first place I don’t like to go out with guys and secondly he’s too short. He’s only what, five-nine or ten. I’m five eleven and with heels six-three, I don’t think so, you go out with him,” Tiffany said.

“Don’t be so vain Tiffany, think of it as doing your duty,” Brenda giggled. Brenda liked teasing her friend and watching her squirm as she became uncomfortable with the thought of men touching her.

“Screw the duty; you know I don’t want to be here.”

“But look at what’s happened to you, you’ve become one of the most sought after models in New York, everyone loves you.”

“No, they love Tiffany, not me.”

“You know, people would sell there souls to be you right now, you’re beautiful, a top model, a nice person and face it you’re only going to get more wanted than you are already.”

“That’s what I’m afraid of, being more popular, and what scares me more is that I’m starting to like it. I look in the magazines and see my picture and I can’t believe it’s me. I’m afraid Brenda that I might end up like you, wanting to be a girl just because I’m famous.”

“What’s wrong with wanting to be a girl?”

“You know what’s wrong, at least I do, this just isn’t right.”

“I keep telling you Tiffany, let go, enjoy what’s happening to you, you’ll be a lot happier.”

Tiffany’s eyes began to fill with tears, she knew she should be enjoying herself and for the most part she had, but that small voice kept telling her what she was doing was wrong, really wrong, she had to let go or she would drive herself crazy.

“I’ll try Brenda; really I will, but I’m not going out with Ron, he’s too short.”

The tension was broken and the girls giggled at the remark.

“Alright, I guess I’ll have to do it but if Mario finds out, your dead.”

“I’ll make sure that doesn’t happen.”

“We could double date, you with your new friend and me with Ron.”

“When?”

“Next week. I’m supposed to find out what they have on Ralph Larsen, hopefully today; Bill’s supposed to call me back.”

“Is Melissa in?”

“Not yet, if she was I wouldn’t be talking like this.”

“Oh.”

“God Tiffany, you’re losing your edge, you’d better get more involved with this thing or you might end up like Natalia.”

“I’ll be careful.”

The phone rang and it was Bill Cline.

“Universal.”

“Hi Brenda, its Bill Cline, I finally have something for you, let’s meet later at the same place, say six o’clock?”

“That’s fine, see you then.”

Brenda lowered the phone and turned to her friend.

“That was Bill. He says he has something for us. Maybe this thing will finally be over,” Brenda said.

“I hope so,” Tiffany said.

Brenda went to the restaurant at the designated time. He wasn’t there yet so she ordered a drink.

“Hi Brenda, what would you like?”

“You remembered my name, I think I’ll have the same Danny.”

“A lemon drop?”

“Yes, they taste like candy.”

“You look good today as usual.”

“Thanks, have you seen my friend yet?”

“No, are you expecting him?”

“Yes.”

“Why don’t you come here some time when you aren’t with him, I’m really a nice guy.”

“I will, maybe with one of my girl friends, we’ll see.”

Bill came through the door and saw Brenda at the bar.

“Hi Brenda, how are you doing?” he asked.

“Pretty good, how about you?”

“I’m fine.”

“The usual sir?” asked Danny.

“No I gave up drinking for a while, it was becoming too much of a habit, I’ll just have a ginger ale.”

“Wow, it’s a new you Bill, why the change?” asked Brenda.

“I was hung over all the time and couldn’t figure out why I felt like shit and then it hit me, I was a drunk. I haven’t had a drink for over a week and I feel great. I have the stuff you want, let’s get a table, I’m hungry.”

Bill and Brenda were seated and Bill took out the file on Ralph Larsen.

“Brenda, before we get started, I know you had set your hopes on this guy as being the drug source, but that isn’t what he is at all.”

“If he isn’t the source then what is he?”

“A doctor that lost his license.”

“But I’ve seen drug containers in the packages he drops off with Melissa.”

“They probably were drugs, but not the ones we want. Ralph Larsen is an alias that he uses so he isn’t recognized. His real name is Dr. Quinton Merchant. He was a famous research doctor at one time specializing in aging. He couldn’t wait to try some things he had found and went around the law and one of his patients died. There was a large lawsuit and he spent some time in jail for what he did. He also lost his license to practice. Now he does things on his own and buys drugs and other things on the black market.”

“What’s that got to do with Melissa?”

“She’s a patient of his. We learned that he is injecting her with stem cells with the hope that they will keep her from aging. All those pills are to keep her from rejecting the stem cells.”

“That’s sick, is that why she is flush when he leaves?”

“It’s probably her body trying to reject the cells. One thing for sure though is that he isn’t the source of the cocaine and meths the girls are hooked on, we’re going to have to look elsewhere.”

“Damn, I want this thing to be over in the worse way.”

“How’s Tiffany holding up, I see her picture everywhere?”

“She’ll be fine, she has some issues but she will be fine.”

“What kind of issues?”

“The men kind, she doesn’t like men looking at her.”

“That’s part of being a model and she’s going to have to get over it.”

“I think we should focus our investigation on Ron and his brother’s girl friend since they are the ones with the most promise. See if you or Tiffany can get a sample of the drugs the girls are using so we can test them. I think we can at least find some kind of foot print as to who is cutting the product. No one is selling pure cocaine and if we run a test on it we can tell who is cutting the drug. It won’t take much; just some residue should work but do it as soon as possible.”

“I will, thanks for the bad news Bill.”

“I’m sorry, but I thought it would be best that you found out about Larsen right away, so we didn’t spend a lot of time working on him and have the real bad guys getting away.”

“You’re right, I’m just disappointed.”

“We might as well have dinner while were here, let me grab a waiter.”

Brenda and Bill made small talk throughout dinner and Brenda noticed a change in the man. It was nice to see him as a man that didn’t have to be a drunk. Maybe now he would find that woman he so much desired but found so elusive. Bill really was a nice man when he was sober.