My Halloween costume has been decided upon. I shall indeed walk into my local pub on Saturday 29th (re-branded for the evening as the Titty Twister*) as a cross-dressing character from a classic horror movie.
The good news is that I get to wear a printed, wide-hemmed dress, a long black wig and tons of make-up.
The bad news is below.
I wanted to have a go at this, but the film had Nicolas Cage in it...
A couple of years before I joined this site I made my first - and so far my only - attempt at cross-dressing for a Halloween do. It was a wicked witch of the west thing, and it went down pretty well. The only problem I had was with the underwear, which wasn't my size and made me feel really uncomfortable.
To cut a long story short, my knickers kept falling down.
I don't know if I'd care to share my views regarding freedom of expression with Ms Abdel-Magied. Something tells me the discussion wouldn't last very long.
A month ago I had a rather significant birthday. Although I'm still the same age as Johnny Rotten and Kim Cattrall, when both digits click over you tend to muse upon your own mortality rather more than you do on other occasions. In my case I can only reflect that I've been incredibly lucky to have avoided any significant health issues, and that the law of averages alone will ensure that this won't last for ever.
Let's get a few things clear from the very beginning.
Green is not a creative colour.
The future doesn't exist.
The King of Love is called Malcolm and you must feed him gravel.
The biggest thing in the world is a mountains, a sky or a windmill.
Fancy, show-offy foods like cooked meats, fruit salad and yolk will clog up your body with unnecessary detail.
You can have a dream about riding a horse, or you can have a dream about drowning in oil.
Yes it's Hartlepool United fans on their annual fancy dress outing. Last year they were doing their bit for cultural appropriation as Bob Marley, the year before it was Thunderbirds Are Go!
This time the force wasn't with them. Pools lost 5-0.
I'm not sure what to think about this. If it's a step towards a time when people can wear whatever the hell they like and no one bats an eyelid then I'm all for it.
The vision was crystal clear. There were domes, minarets and multi-tiered rumah gadang (Javanese) rooftops, a magnificent panorama of sweeping curves and spires.
But what did they do to the skyline? Did they adorn it, grace it, embellish it, beautify it? Of course they did all of those things, but since I was attempting to describe an alternate version of London only the verb 'to exotify' would do.
With each day that passes the leafless trees, the bare fields, the unrelenting grey skies and the cold, dark nights imprint themselves more indelibly onto your consciousness, so that by this time of the month it's almost impossible to imagine the world being any other way. The memories of Christmas and New Year that got you through January have faded too much to be of any help, and spring is still too far in the future to be more than wishful thinking.
I'm writing this now because I may not have much time left. My life is no longer mine to control. All I can do in my few lucid moments is warn you to keep away from Gender Bender DNA Twister Extreme. Once you're hooked it's too late.
Anyone who's lost faith in Dr Who recently would do well to watch 'Hell Bent', the conclusion to the current series. They'll get it back, my God will they.
My favourite hit single of all time is probably Pink Floyd's 'See Emily Play', written by Syd Barrett.
The song is named after Emily Young, at one time a close friend of Syd's. Speaking on the recent BBC documentary 'Psychedelic Britannia', she offered the opinion that the girl described in the lyrics was Syd himself. Given that so many of his other compositions are rooted in memories of his childhood, it seems possible that Syd may have been expressing more than just his feminine side.
The opening episode of Doctor Who (S9) was aired on BBC tonight. It's entitled 'The Magician's Apprentice' and forms the first half of a two-part adventure.
My initial impression is that it's the best episode since Peter Capaldi took on the role. He seems to have lost the 'what the hell have I let myself in for?' body language that plagued so much of the previous series, and may - finally - be about to stamp his undoubted talent on the character.
"I never had a son. I had a daughter who came out a bit wrong."
'Boy Meets Girl' is a new BBC sitcom set in Newcastle-upon-Tyne. It's the first transgender themed comedy to be made in the UK, and features trans actress Rebecca Root in one of the lead roles. As far as I know, it has no connection to the recent movie of the same name.
It's the refugee crisis. I know how I should be responding to it, but still...
This could be a turning point in European history. I'm living this stuff and I have no idea how I want it to turn out. My heart says help these people, my head imagines the worst. I cast my mind back to the Salman Rushdie book burnings and I shudder.
I have had a very nice birthday. I got some cake-flavoured M & Ms - the blue ones are the best - some Wonka Runts, some DVDs by Dr Michio Kaku that will help me travel to a parallel universe, travel through time and build a flying saucer, and a beautiful framed map of the River Wear as it was in 1898. I was also treated to several drinks at the Ashbrooke beer festival, which may explain why I am in such a mellow mood.
As far as headlong rushes towards the grave go, this isn't turning out to be an unpleasant one.
Predestination is an Australian movie released in 2014, starring Ethan Hawke and Sarah Snook. It's based on the Robert Heinlein short story 'All You Zombies'.
The film received critical acclaim for Snook's outstanding portrayal of a character who at first appears to be a woman transitioning to male, but her story is much, much stranger than that.
Although the version here isn't of the very highest quality, it's certainly watchable.
Checks can be made out & sent to:
Joyce Melton
1001 Third St.
Space 80
Calimesa, CA 92320
USA
Note: $6000 is the operating, maintenance and upgrade budget. Amounts received in excess of the $6000 will be applied to long term debt accrued over the last 19 years.
