The actual date is December 08, 2024.
For all the things we can get for Christmas Eve and Christmas Day, I look at all the items people buy for others and inwardly shake my head. For me, the true meaning of Christmas is not of the material, it is what we mean to others. Everyone is entitled to a wish for Christmas, as that is the day that Christ was born. If everyone else can have a wish, I can too.
Only that I know my wish will never be granted. The upstairs will never allow it to be.
My wish, if possible, would be for Leila to come back to me in my life, what little is left until they take me.
Leila was an author here, very brilliant, hampered by a debilitating disease. She was going blind. I so much wanted to help her, be her eyes, be everything for her. An incident occurred, and she left our site. She is free to talk about it whenever or if she comes back, but I will not say.
Since she is now blind, the chances of her ever coming back here are basically nil. So even though I have real life photos of her, I will never ever use them. What I did use, is an ai software to generate a photo that came the closest to looking like her. I can do that.
For her, I accept the wrongs both real and imagined.
For her, I take the Spear of Destiny to pierce my heart.
For her, I touch the electrodes on The Ark of the Covenant and commit myself to be cleansed of all sin, except for loving you Leila, from God.
For Leila, the one thing I know of that I cannot ever deny, is that female, or male, I desire you, I love you.
Forever.
My wish is for you Leila.
My favorite Music: Arch Angel , HD Accel World ED 2 Unite Instrumental, and Dreaming of You .
Old Friends of mine that have passed on: Chelsea "princess chelsea" Solis, Bailey Summers, Elsbeth, Ellen Hayes, Dawn Natelle, Karen Lockhart, Crazypagangurl, Billie Sue Pilgrim, Grover, Arecee, Cindilee, Edeyn Hannah Blackney, Beth Williams, Holly Hart, Wren Erindae Phoenix, T.D. Aldoennetti, and Darla Raspberry, Florin Tudor "Blackey" from "Everquest 2."
Friends still living: Clara Schumann, Stacy St. Clair "Stacyinlove". Tanya J. Allan, Randalynn, Andrea Lena DiMaggio, Melanie Brown, Enemyoffun, Bobbi Cabot, Avia Connor, Maeryn Lamonte, Tels, Amethyst, Tigger, Melanie Ezell "Rasufelle", Alyssa Plant "Kit", Aylesea, Tofu Cannibal, and Windosebaris and many more!
Last, but not least, Erin - Webmistress of this site. She ALWAYS left me out of the BCTS crew!
But I didn't leave her out of my heart.
Sephrena
My music representing me Arch Angel , HD Accel World ED 2 Unite Instrumental, and Dreaming of You .
Comments
Not a single day ever goes by
...That I do not think of you. You are always present in my thoughts. I am always wishing what could I do for you? And that is where it lies.
What could I do for you Leila?
For now, all that I can do is think of positive thoughts and include you into every one of them. It is all that I can do for now. I miss you something terrible.
Maybe one day, In a life far far away...
Sephrena
My music representing me Arch Angel , HD Accel World ED 2 Unite Instrumental, and Dreaming of You .
Always, always thinking positively of you
I know that in my heart, when you left, you had wished to hurt me with words and wounded me deeply. I forgive you. You did not understand me, did not want to, and just wanted to go. Well, I am here. A more complete person than I have ever been. But my time is short, very short. I wish I could have had the time to know the real you. To heal your pain and sight. I really did want to do whatever it is you needed - for you.
If only we could roll back time. Youthify ourselves. Again I view you in a postive light, myself as well. If you discover this after I have gone, know that I give you everything of myself. For the bird that wishes to fly :) Soar!
I believe that the ai has captured your spirit and intent, and that is the best part of you I adore.
I will always love you dear Leila. I will always adore you.
I will always be dreaming... of you.
Sephrena
I miss her, too
I only know her stories, but they always struck in a place most stories here don't. They cut through/past the wish fulfillment, the fantasy that so many of us seem to live in and have a feel of reality, and despite the discomfort, they satisfy in a deep way.
I wish she would come back, but I gather that is unlikely.
Some encouragement in waiting
You know, Even if I have to wait for you into the next life, I will. There is no rush. I believe that if something is meant to be, it will be, either in the here and now, or later. And, I would like to believe that if you will wait for me, I will be there for you. I will wait for you. Because I believe in you.
Always and forever yours Dear Leila.
Sephrena