by Saless
Chapter 53

When Sarah woke she couldn't help but stare at Erica lying so peacefully beside her. She brushed a strand of golden blond hair away from her face and wondered why Erica put up with her. She's so beautiful! It's a wonder she hasn't gotten fed up with me and found someone better. It wouldn't be hard for her. she thought, a single tear trailing down her cheek.

Her contemplation was soon ended by an urgent need to use the bathroom. By the time she returned Erica was already awake. "Good morning, Sarah!" she said brightly.

"Good morning! What would you like for breakfast?" Sarah replied.

Sarah fidgeted uncomfortably as Erica gazed strangely at her for a while before answering. "Pancakes?" she suggested.

"Uh, yeah, sounds good." Sarah agreed and went to make them.

Sarah was cooking the last pancake when there was a knock at the door. "Erica, can you get that for me?" she called out.

Erica made sure her robe was closed and opened the door. "Good morning Mike, Jill, how are you?" she said, stepping aside so they could come in.

"Great." they answered as they walked in.

"If that's Mike and Jill tell them we've got enough pancakes to share!" Sarah called from the kitchen.

Soon they were all sitting at the table eating pancakes. "Vash has been harping on that idea of trying out our abilities and equipment since we left last night. When do we want to do that?" Jill asked.

Erica shrugged and said, "Any time's fine with me."

"If you guys don't have any plans we could go after breakfast." Sarah said.

We should also bring the magical objects I haven't figured out the purpose of yet. I can look through them some more while you're practicing. Vash said while gorging himself on a pancake covered in strawberry jam and maple syrup.

"Is there anything you don't eat?" Erica said.

I'm not a cat, I can eat whatever I like. Vash replied primly.

"You may not be a cat, but you sure act like one sometimes." Mike said. At Erica's curious look he relayed what Vash had said.

After breakfast they started ferrying equipment to Sarah's car. As Mike and Sarah were carrying the first batch out to the car Erica said, "Jill, can you help me with something?" Jill nodded and Erica led her back to Sarah's room and closed the door behind them.

"Is something wrong?" Jill asked worriedly.

Erica sat down on the edge of Sarah's bed and said, "Not exactly."

"Well? I can't read your mind, you know." Jill said when Erica didn't say anymore.

"Um, well, when Sarah came back into the room this morning she asked me what I wanted for breakfast." Erica said hesitantly.

Jill frowned in confusion and asked, "So what?"

"Well, I uh, wanted to say her." Erica replied, blushing and looking down at her feet.

"Mike's said that to me lots of times, what's the big deal?" Jill asked, looking confused.

"I was attracted to her!" Erica exclaimed and then slapped her hand over her mouth when she realized how loudly she'd said it.

"Erica, you're not making much sense! Of course you're attracted to her, you love her!" Jill replied, baffled by Erica's strange behavior.

"Well, like that, yeah, but also…physically." Erica replied softly.

"Oh, is that all?" Jill replied, grinning.

"But she's a girl!" Erica protested.

Jill shrugged, "So? Maybe you're bisexual. It's no big deal if you are. Or maybe she just happens to be the person you love!"

"But…" Erica sputtered.

"Erica, you've loved her for years. It's no surprise that you'd find her attractive! I assume that you've never been attracted to a girl before, but I don't see the problem. It's not like you're cheating on her or anything." Jill said.

"I kind of feel like I am." Erica said sorrowfully.

"Erica, she is Sean, so you're not cheating on anybody!" Jill said firmly.

"It's just, she seems so different, while still the same. Does that make any sense?" Erica said.

Jill nodded, "Yes, it does. She seems a little more confident and outgoing now than she was before. She even stands up for herself on occasion! She used to let everyone walk all over her before."

Erica looked guiltily at Jill and said, "Including me, right?"

Jill shrugged, "You may have taken a little advantage of her willingness to follow your lead, but not that much. After all, in your case she'd follow you anywhere, so it would be hard not to take advantage a little."

"I guess." Erica said, not sounding very convinced.

"So do you think you could handle it now, if Sarah never changed back to Sean?" Jill said.

Jill was pleased to see that Erica actually paused and thought about it, instead of giving a snap answer. "I…think maybe I could." she said softly.

"Good! But don't tell her that, okay? If you show any preference either way she'll go in that direction, I think. It would be best if she makes her own choices about her gender." Jill said.

Erica frowned, "You make it sound like there's doubt about what gender she wants to be."

"I think so, yeah. But I don't want to push her. If we're understanding the Magician's Answer correctly, she'll be able to switch back and forth at will someday. Despite that, she'll have to choose a gender to present as in her daily life, like at work. When that time comes I want her to decide what is best for her, not anyone else." Jill replied.

"Like me." Erica said. Jill nodded. "But wouldn't telling her that I can love her in either form be helpful, then?"

"Yes, but if you say you're okay with her as a girl, she's likely to take that to mean that you prefer her that way. You know how she is." Jill said.

Erica sighed and stood up, "Okay, you're right. Thanks."

"For what?" Jill asked.

"For listening to my whining and accepting the both of us." Erica replied with a tear in her eye.

"What are friends for?" Jill replied and hugged her. "Come on, lets help them load up the rest of our stuff." Erica wiped her face and they went out to help move everything they'd need. Mike and Sarah had already moved most of it, so it didn't take long to finish up.

"Is everything okay?" Mike asked when Jill came out with Sarah's new bow and quivers.

Jill smiled and said, "Yes, everything's great! I'll tell you about it later." Mike nodded and they finished loading the car.

Jill guided Sarah to a rocky area well away from any buildings that was shielded by hills on all sides. "Here we are." she said.

"Now what?" Erica asked as they got out of the car.

"Now we see what we, and our new toys, are really capable of." Jill replied.

"It's too bad you won't be able to practice with your crossbow yet." Sarah said as she got her archery equipment together.

"How am I supposed to practice my abilities?" Erica asked.

"Uh, I don't think we want to try that." Sarah said.

It is not necessary to practice the powers of a Null. She will not be directly affected by any magical or psionic effect. That includes the healing water, though. Vash said.

"I didn't think about that! Maybe you should stick with ranged weapons Erica!" Sarah exclaimed.

Erica looked confused until Jill told her what Vash had said. "Oh no you don't! Just because I can't be healed with that water doesn't mean I'm going to hide behind you guys!" she protested.

"But…" Sarah said, but Jill cut her off.

"She's not going to hide behind us, Sarah. Besides, she's immune to magic, and those bracers will protect her. You and Mike are more vulnerable than she is." Jill said.

"I guess." Sarah said.

Sarah, why don't you try out those wands now. Vash suggested as he went back to looking through the objects retrieved from the tomb.

"Okay." Sarah replied, putting her bow down and retrieving the wands from the car. She held the green wand and said the activation word, "Desma." She recoiled from the car as bright lights streamed out of it from all the objects retrieved from the tomb, including the wand in her hand. "How do I turn this off?!"

Just say the activation word again. Vash replied. Sarah did so and was relieved to see that the light faded immediately. Now try it without the wand. Vash suggested.

Sarah nodded and said the word again after putting the wand back in the car. "Whoa!" she cried, falling down in surprise at the glare from the car full of magical objects. "Desma!" she yelled, and sighed in relief as the light faded.

"Are you alright?" Erica asked, kneeling next to her.

"Yeah, I'm okay. Just surprised me, it was brighter than the first time." she replied.