by Edeyn Hannah Blackeney
Sunday, 30 September, 2007
Dear Diary
I know it sounds corny, but...
I get to have my first-ever slumber party next weekend! Mom said I could invite two of the girls over -- out of 'Nessa, Hayleigh, and Jennifer. 'Nessa and Hayleigh and their parents already know my secret so that's not a big deal, but Jenn doesn't, so she's gonna be the one left out, even though she's my best friend.
Do I just not mention the party in front of her and hope she doesn't find out? Or do I make something up? Or just tell her that it's Mom's fault because she already knows 'Nessa and Hayleigh's parents?
This is not a good feeling.
I mean, I wanted to be happy and stuff, but it's not fair to Jenn.
In other news, Auntie Rhoda is on her way here. She'll get here right before dinner and we'll all go out to someplace. I'm really nervous. She's my favorite Aunt, but she's never met me as Courtney yet.
I mean, I wish I had a magic wand or something that would make me have always been Courtney. Then I wouldn't be nervous about Auntie Rhoda and I wouldn't be upset about Jenn because I'd be able to invite her over.
Why's things gotta be so complicated? That old Canadian chick... well, not OLD old, but she's gotta be like 26 or 27... that sings that song called Complicated has it right.
Why is it such a big deal to everyone else what's under my skirt? Or shorts. Or jeans. Or whatever.
I mean, I'm a girl, I know I've always been a girl, my parents are helping me see the right doctors so I can be the girl I'm supposed to be, why does everyone else think that not only is it their business, but that they have the right to be offended at me over it and hate me for being who I am?
I just heard a car door... Oh! Auntie Rhoda's here! I'll write again tomorrow!
Courtney
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Comments
Dear Courtney
Dear Courtney,
A best friend is someone who knows YOU. Everything about YOU. they know your darkest secrets, and your greatest dreams. If you feel that Jennifer is your BEST friend, then you need to somehow come clean with her. Her feelings will be hurt reguardless of how you play this. Maybe she can come over for the evening and go home before her curfew. or you could use the 'my mom knows their moms' excuse, or even better yet, find out just how good of a friend she is.
As for Aunt Rhoda, if she's your favorite Aunt? (we all have one) then she probibly always suspected that you were special. ;) I'll bet she is excited to meet Courtney.
hugs as always,
Snoops
Dear Anistasia
I don't really agree with that at all.
A partner, a spouse, maybe, but a friend: just like Courtney says in the second last paragraph ... what's under her clothes is just not other people's business. I liked that paragraph. Though simply put, it sums up with deft succinctness the brutal offense that our society visits on transgendered people.
No reason to tell Jennifer, it shouldn't affect their relationship.
XX
AD