The doctor said I had the Feminizer disease and a strong case of it. I went numb and pale and they knew it. I thought I was going to faint. Another nurse came in with water and helped me as I slowly fell off my chair in panic.

"Please don't tell me that! How can I manage that? I'm a man!"

Feminizer Disease Takes My Body Over
Chapter 2
By Terry Hansay
 

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Sorry but I lost it again and could not go into the lingerie store. We sat in the car outside Mary's Bra and Shape Shop. "How the heck could I ever walk into a store to buy myself bras?" I said. Just then I broke down crying again, I was very emotional! My wife saw my emotional signs and said "OK, let's go home." Something is changing my body and mind quicker than I thought.

At home I crashed in the living room. My wife Cathy knew I needed her support and she was there for me. We talked until midnight and I finally started feeling much better about all this. Both of us agreed we would take one day at a time. We will handle the disease together if I had it.

Next day, I got dressed - yes, I put on "my" sports bra and girdle with lots "pushing" from my wife. I really did not want to wear them, but the bra made my breasts feel better. She said I would have to go shopping sometime and maybe tonight after our doctor's appointments we could try shopping again. I agreed but knew it was going to be hard.

While in the lunchroom at work, the TV news was on and there was a news story of a man having the Feminizer disease. He lives my town. Holy cow, another person right here in my town, what are the chances? Two other women in the lunchroom talked about it and did not seem to mind the disease and were sympathetic towards the problem. It sounded like they understood the disease. Wow, I felt good about their "thinking" but I sure hope I do not have that disease. I wrote down the name of the man with the disease. I would like to meet that guy if I have it, too.

I got home and my wife was already there. She had dinner ready and reminded me we had the gynecologist appointment and we needed to stop in our regular doctor too. She had the results from my blood test.

We cleaned up and I went to change.

She said, "Hold it! Where are you going?"

"I am going to take my bra and girdle off as I did last night before the doctor appointment."

She said, "No need to do that. They expect you to be wearing a bra. The doctor told you that you better start wearing a bra 24/7."

I did not like that idea, the doctors seeing me in a bra. I had a hard time seeing myself in a bra, let alone showing someone else!

Cathy hugged me and said, "Come on you will be OK. The doctors are expecting you in a bra."

Oh, boy here it comes again, I am getting really nervous. She pulled me out the door and we were off.

We got to the gynecologist's office. As we went into the waiting room, my hands were sweating. Cathy tried to calm me down. We were ushered into the examining room. I saw the stirrups on the table. She knew I was looking at them. In came the doctor, another woman doctor. She was very nice and put me at ease. She asked me to take my top off exposing my sports bra, then asked me to take my bra off. I fumbled with the hooks but got it off. She was pleased I was wearing a bra. She poked at me asking lots of questions then looked at the charts. She said she got the blood tests from my other doctor.

The doctor saw I was nervous and had the dreaded disease on my mind. She said I should get dressed and meet her in her office next door. My wife held my hand and I felt something coming. I got dressed and my wife hugged me and said all will be OK, we will get through this. She watched as I got dressed and was still fumbling at putting on my bra. My wife said I needed to practice putting on my bra when we get home. There is that "my" bra talk. I am not doing well. Cathy could tell.

We Went into the doctor's office. There was another nurse sitting there with a pile of magazines on her lap. I saw the large print on the cover - Feminizer Life. Oh, what is next? The doctor said I had the Feminizer disease and a strong case of it. I went numb and pale and they knew it. I thought I was going to faint. Another nurse came in with water and helped me as I slowly fell off my chair in panic.

"Please don't tell me that! How can I manage that? I'm a man!"

The doctors tried to reassure me that they could treat my Feminizer disease and return me to my masculine self, but it might take an
extended time period since my disease level was very high. She also said there are lots of people to help me. Cathy came to my side, hugged me, and said we will get through this ordeal - lots of men have recovered from this disease.

I asked what to expect. The doctor introduced me to the other nurse, the one with all the magazines. "This is Nurse Sally. She will be your private nurse who specializes in this treatment." I was so nervous and numb, I could hardly speak. Everyone saw the fear in my face. The doctor suggested that I get a shot to help me relax and to come back tomorrow for some consultation with Sally.

I agreed, got the shot and it did wonders! I could hardly think, went home and right to bed.

Next morning, I could not go to work and my wife took off too. We sat around talking about my disease. We looked on the Internet. Boy, it looked like I would be a woman and have to be in that "mode" of thinking for a long time to be cured! We talked about buying a wig, all the clothes, and high heels. When she mentioned makeup I got real white again. She knew she was going too fast for me, but for some reason Cathy was handling all this well. Thank goodness for me I thought, that she is so sweet and understanding.

I looked at Cathy and said I would like to dress like a man for as long as I can and not show the world I have this disease.

She said "That might be hard since your body development might be quicker than you think and your clothes will not fit you."

I said "I will buy bigger clothes." "Silly boy, you don't need bigger clothes, just different shaped clothes."

Either way, I wanted to try to hide the fact my body was changing. We both agreed we needed to go back to my "private" nurse and consult with her.

Cathy made an appointment with my nurse, Sally. As my wife and I were getting dressed, yes in "my" bra and girdle, I noticed my body had changed even more in a couple of days. My clothes were getting tighter.

"Terry, we will have to do some shopping after our doctor appointment. You can't keep wearing that same sports bra and girdle." She was right and I knew we had to go shopping.

At the gynecologist office, Sally met us at the door and ushered us into an examining room. She had another nurse come in and take blood pressure and more blood for another blood test. Then we started talking about the disease.

After looking at my charts she thought I have a strong case of the Feminizer disease and it will take 1-2 years to cure me of the disease. I told her I did not want to become a "total" woman and that I was going to dress as a man as long as I could.

She smiled and said, "You know our society does not have a problem with you or your disease."

I knew that, and seeing that man on the TV news yesterday with the same disease made me feel better.

"Either way, I want to hold off wearing a dress or wig and makeup," I told my wife and nurse.

Sally said "When the time comes, you will feel much better in a dress and will pass as a total woman anyhow."

I knew they were right but could not face the change. I didn't know how I would handle being a woman.

Sally gave me more books and magazines to help me understand my disease. She also suggested attending a two-day school on how to cope with my new lifestyle. My wife said she saw the school on the Internet. They would help me understand the disease and help me live as a woman. Sally said the school has helped her other clients learn to live as women in our society.

Sally also suggested while at the school, I take their hypnotic classes and allow them to hypnotize me into thinking more like a woman. This will help my emotions and my presence in living with the disease.

"What is that?", I asked, "Hypnotize me?"

"Yes," Sally said, "You will be given relaxing calming thoughts of being a woman, a pretty woman and you should be proud to be a woman. You will accept the fact you have to be a woman, wear soft clothes, dresses, bras, nylons, all the things you are now resisting. Let's face it - your body will be totally different. You need to deal with it. It is hard to change your brain to accept being a woman. These hypnotic classes will help you cope with your new self."

Sally said many men like being a woman and want to stay feminine. My wife got nervous with that line of thinking and so was I. I told Sally I wanted to me cured of this disease as quickly as possible.

Sally said "One step at a time. Take the books and magazines home. There is a good story in there about the two day school with lots of helpful information".

"But, before you go, your doctors have both agreed you need to start a series of estrogen shots."

"Oh no, I am not doing that, helping the disease development me into a woman, no way!"

Cathy grabbed me and said, "They know what is best for your cure, your recovery. You must listen to them. The estrogen shots will make your life calmer. They will reduce your stress level and help you deal with the disease."

"OK," I said, "But I am not happy about this."

I looked at Sally and said, "Will these shots really turn me into a woman?"

Sally said, "Don't worry about that, the shots are all part of your cure." Sally gave me my first estrogen shot. My mind went blank, I saw myself in a dress, hair all done up, wearing makeup, the start of my womanhood. Oh no! What is happening? Sally said I will need an estrogen shot every week for a while. She will monitor my estrogen levels each week when I come in for my weekly exams. With her big smile, she said, "Now was that so bad?" All I could say was thank you, not sure why but I did.

Sally's closing words were, "You must 'live out' the Feminizer disease fully before they can start your cure. Don't be afraid of being a woman. Look at us, we are having fun, right Cathy?" With a big smile, Cathy said, "Let's go lingerie shopping, Dear".

So we left the doctor's office for my first shopping trip. Cathy really wanted me to go to the lingerie store Mary's Bra and Shape Shop. So I said, "OK, let's go."

We got to the store and Mary, the owner, greeted us with a nice smile and was very pleasant. She asked us what we were looking for.

Cathy said "This is my husband I told you about yesterday. He has the Feminizer disease."

I got so weak in the knees hearing that, Cathy had to hold me up. Mary said "Oh dear, we have many men with the same disease shopping here. Please don't be nervous. We can help you through this."

Cathy said we were looking for bras, shapers, nylons, and camisoles today. I could hardly speak. Mary said "OK, let's get you measured. Step back to our fitting room, Terry."

I said to Cathy, "Measured, what does she mean, measured for what?" Cathy said "you have to be measured for your new bra and girdle
dear. You might as well get used to it, this is what women do. You do want a good fitting bra and girdle, don't you?"

I was taken to a very pretty room, all done up in pink with flowers on the wallpaper, very girlish, a very calming room I thought. Mary said, "Please Dear, take off your blouse so I can measure you." "This is not a blouse," I said and took off my shirt.

"My, my, my a sports bra. That bra does not give a girl much support. We will have to do something about that, won't we, Dear?" I wondered what she meant and what kind of bra she would recommend.

Mary measured me, did some thinking and said I was just between a 36A and a B cup. What, between an A and a B cup? I was an A cup the other day at the doctor's office, am I getting bigger?

"Are you sure Mary that is his cup size?" Cathy asked.

Mary smiled and said I will be developing quicker now as the disease takes hold. Mary recommended the A cup for now, but said I will need the B cup very soon. In some bras, I might need the B cup now. She suggested I come in each week to be measured. I thought to myself, this is moving way too fast!

Mary came back with several bras, all Playtex brand in several colors. I thought to myself they look pretty. I slapped myself and thought what am I thinking? Mary helped me put on the "Cross Your Heart" soft cup bra. I couldn't hook it in the back and Cathy stepped in to help me. Wow, it felt good. Mary knew my breasts were tender and sore. The soft cup helped cradle my budding breasts. I looked down at them cupped in this new piece of clothing, strange to my body, and puffs of flesh were peeking out of the tops of the cups. Mary said that was OK, since I was between an A and B cup bra and it looked nice. That was not my thought, but I let it go.

Mary and Cathy were pleased with the fit, and asked me my thoughts. I looked in the mirror at my new shape and didn't know what to say. This was all too new for me. My wife hugged me and said I looked great and I would get used to the new support and look.

Cathy continued to give me positive support to say I looked good in "my" pretty bra, saying that it gave good support and fit me very well, I "filled out" the cups beautifully - just what I didn't want to hear! Playtex was her favorite bra too.

"Now we can match, Honey. We will be matching twins in our 'Playtex Cross Your Heart' bras." Great!

Mary gave me a lesson in lingerie styles telling me all the pros and cons of underwire bras, soft cup bras, even a hard cup bra.

I said "What, a hard cup bra. What is that?"

She just happened to have one and told me,"It's for t-shirts and other tight clothing. The bra gives you a nice round supported look and doesn't let your nipples show through. You don't want your breasts too low, you know. This bra has very good support, lifts and separates your budding breasts. Here, try it on Terry."

Mary handed me the "hard cup" Playtex bra. Wow! That one felt nice too. I saw the flower between the cups and wondered what that was for. I was having real trouble hooking the bra in back because my sports bra hooks in front. The girls laughed, helped me hook the bra, and adjusted it. Mary said I needed to bend forward and place my breasts into the cups. I said that I could not wear this bra, it will "show" through my clothes. This t-shirt bra gave me a very definite and perky shape.

Cathy and Sally said together, "You better get used to having a pretty bustline, Dear. It is part of your body now. Be proud of your shape!"

Next came the girdles, long ones, short ones, with lace all over them and clips on them. What is all this for? Mary said the clips are garters for your nylons. Nylons help hold down your girdle, plus all women wear stockings, you know. The long legged girdle was a tight fit and really accentuated my shape. I didn't want it to give me a feminine shape but what choice did I have? Cathy said I would have to wear a girdle every day and I would get used to wearing it. Over time, I would feel naked without my girdle. I found that hard to believe.

We tried on several more matching lingerie "outfits" and called it a day. As I was taking my last bra off, a very soft white underwire bra, Cathy said, leave "your" bra on, you can wear that one home. Cathy, this bra will be seen under this shirt and I will really have a noticeable bustline with this bra. "So," she said, "Look at me. I have a bustline. You can see my bras under my blouse." I said, "Do you really think I should wear it, won't people stare at me, wearing a bra and all?" Cathy got upset with me and said I better get used to it and relax.

"No one will care. Remember, you have the disease. You are expected to wear a bra, just like me."

OK, I left the Playtex girdle and underwire 36A bra on, dressed and went out into the store. The place was filled with women. Then in the corner of my eye I saw a man looking at nightgowns. He looked familiar. Wow, could this be that man who was on the TV news with the same disease I have? It was, I could never forget that face. He had a big bustline and very shapely body. I am noticing things like that now. I pointed him out to my wife, she said to go over and meet him, he is in the same "boat" you are in.

I was so self-conscious, I knew everyone could see my bra through my shirt. I got weak in my legs as I was walking towards him. He turned, and wow, he too had a pretty bra on and he was wearing what looked like a women's blouse with a big bow in front, very feminine.

He spotted my bra, put two and two together that I had the disease, and said "Hi, my name is Karl."

After we shared introductions, I said I saw him on TV and how good it felt to know there was someone else in town with the same disease. Tensions were broken and we exchange phone numbers. We both agreed we needed to talk more.

Karl saw all the pretty lingerie in my hand and said I had good taste in lingerie. He too loves the Playtex bras, wears them all the time, nothing else. Wow, this guy is talking openly and freely with me about his underwear. I returned a complement about his pretty blouse. We both smiled and agreed we need to talk more.

I walked over to the cashier in a crowd of other women. Boy did I feel strange, but to my relief, the ladies did not give me a second look. I knew they could see my new bra and could see the many bras and girdles I had in my arms, but no comments or looks, just like I was another "girl" in line. I felt better and found myself "standing tall" in my new bra, my chest was out there but for some reason no one cared.

It was getting late but Cathy wanted to stop for coffee. I got nervous since I did not have my coat and I knew my bra showed through my shirt. I said I could not go in there. Cathy gave me that look, like I better get it together and get in there, she was tired. So we went in the coffee shop and nothing, no smiles, no remarks, nothing. No one giggled that I was a man wearing a bra, had a shape, and believe me you can see my bra through the white blouse. I think Cathy picked that blouse for me as a test. Wow, this is cool and I know they can see my Playtex bra, I thought. I was feeling better about my new look even with all this
public awareness.

At coffee, Cathy asked me about Karl and if we were going to get together and talk. Karl was well ahead of me in his disease and wears women's clothes well. Although he was not wearing a wig, you could plainly see he was a man with the Feminizer disease. That seemed OK with everyone. He was sick and the public dealt with it. I was quickly learning that the outside world would not make fun of me in my new body.

I told Cathy I would like to meet with Karl. She thought it was a good idea, but I needed to take it slow. I asked her what I should do about my job. She said, "Nothing, Go to work and explain you are sick. 99% of the staff are women, they will handle it well and not make fun of you." She reminded me that this is a disease and will not be forever.

We got home and got ready for bed. Taking my bra and girdle off felt so good, I am not getting used to the straps yet but my nipples feel better with the bra covering them. I put the cream on my budding nipples like the doctor told me and it felt good. My wife saw how I struggled talking off the girdle, she said I needed a lesson on how to take the girdle off and she proceeded to show me.

"Just roll your girdle down slowly and off it comes." She also said "Those boxer shorts need to go." What, what does that mean?

"Here, I bought you some pretty soft panties instead of those boxers."

"Why can't I wear my boxers?"

She said, "Do you see me wearing boxers? Now let's get with the program and get you into these. They are much nicer. You will see."

The next thing I knew, I was standing there in "my" new panties. Yes, they were nicer but the lace and flowers all over did not sit well with me. I was too tired to fight back.

I jumped into bed and heard Cathy say, "Dear I have something else for your new body."

She keeps calling my body new. I don't like that but it's true. She walked over with a soft pink full length nylon nightgown with lace all over the top and bottom. I almost fainted seeing it. It was so feminine and girlish. From behind her back, she pulled out another nightgown and said, "See, we can have matching nightgowns. How cute!" She slipped mine over my head. It felt good, very soft. I melted and she knew it. Her big smile and hug made all the difference as she slipped hers on. How could I not wear the
matching nightgown?

There we were in bed, in our matching nightgowns. She reached over and started playing with my budding breasts. "Terry what do you think of today's changes? Can you beat this disease? Can you think and act like a woman for a while, and still be mentally OK?"

She said she was OK with all this, enjoyed helping me shop today, and liked the idea she can work with me on this disease. I was so relieved to hear her say this. it helped me think that I could beat this disease. I told her that with her help I could become the "best" woman, if that is what it takes to cure me.

Continued later, dear. Hope you all like!
 

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