The Recoverer (10).
by
Angharad.
It seems years since Stephanie emerged from her chrysalis but it's only two or three. She has completed her A-levels and also achieved the age of majority. I said rather stupidly a couple of years ago, if she did well in her A-levels, I'd pay for operation as she'd be over eighteen, with the stupid ruling by the Supreme court, she would no longer qualify as female despite having the same as I do, a functioning labia and vagina which means I can have sex like a woman but can't all myself one legally. The justice system seems run by TERFs and obscenely wealthy writers and takes no account of the number of lives of ordinary people it has destroyed, the government seems as transphobic as the Reform party, who actually brag about being transphobic. Nigel Farage is every bit as much a liar as the orange bully in the big white house in America. It seems neither has any idea what truth is and it seems to be spreading to other political parties.

I read an interesting article in the i Newspaper which suggested all Chancellors of the Exchequer since the time of Thatcher's, Lawson, tell lies about the economy, which explains why no matter how much it improves, we are always in debt and deficient in some way, so they can't relax things and pay benefits unless we're approaching an election when they find a few quid tucked in the back of a drawer in No. 11*, so can buy off the offended group.

I have come to the conclusion by bitter experience that all politicians lie whenever they say anything, and the public most of whom lack the equipment to have a functioning synapse, believe them. They are especially good creating scapegoats, the current one being illegal migrants, not telling the public how they are actively recruiting from abroad because we lack so many skills in this country. We are told they will build so many affordable houses, but we lack the builders to create them, and those we have would rather build executive ones because the return is greater, and money is the driver of all things, religion is dominated by the banks, who are closing branches everywhere so they can pay directors even more obscene bonuses, but you try cashing a cheque if the post office is closed - and remember they closed most of those a few years ago.

Back to scapegoats - when they run out of new ones, they revert to minorities who can't fight back and remember that transwomen are the greatest threat to cisgendered women and spend most of their time planning or carrying out attacks on them in public toilets. That they only become 'women' to undermine the women's movement and attack and rape natural women whenever they can. Why these lies are believed by ordinary people astonishes me, why they are spread by TERFs and obscenely wealthy women bullies who write very poor children's novels or verbose whodunits is again another mystery. TERFs, I know hate men and everyone else who isn't a man-hating lesbian, and are more dangerous to women than transwomen are, especially in small, enclosed spaces. So why are these lies propagated?

Anyway, there are two more modified transwomen, in my house these days who will continue to quietly try and change the law which makes the UK a transphobic state, which it would hate to have publicised but it is fast becoming the truth, and governments of either hue, don't seem interested in sorting it, who lie in opposition but do nothing when in power. It would be good to see them turned into non-persons, yes I could quite enjoy that, then they'd know what it feels like.

It seems even though my status is lower than illegal immigrants, I still find plenty of work from insurance companies and other seekers-after-the-dosh, as the level of crime is always rising according to politicians and police, apparently if this doesn't frighten Joe Public enough, they suddenly announce aliens from outer-space who we all need protection from, so vote for them alone as, no one else can do it. It's laughable to people with a functioning synapse but they are increasingly scarce through the dumbing down of all forms of education and the media and the total abandonment of climate change legislation, to which they all signed up and then reneged upon. It appears that the presence of a house-sparrow is something to grace the front page of newspapers while continuing theft and lies by politicians is buried deep inside, probably in tiny announcements. Bread and circuses, first mentioned by Tacitus, in ancient Rome now becomes football and bread-free diets.

So how is work holding up, as I said before, there is plenty as people collect their treasures and others will try and steal them without paying, it was ever thus but it seems to have had a resurgence in recent years, which means insurance companies are paying out more to bereft victims, who weep crocodile tears over their losses until they receive the insurance compensation. I had a stand up row with one supposed victim who claimed that the theft of his priceless antique had no real victim, as the insurance companies were rolling in it. I pointed out that they had shareholders who pay the loss and also customers who pay extra premiums while trying to protect their properties against fire and flood, which seems increasingly common these days. He asked me if I was going to arrest the weather. I told him no, and knowing he was an executive of a well known oil company, I said I was building a foolproof case against several American and European oil companies who had caused climate change and were going to be sued by the 11 billion of us who have been the innocent victims of their mendacity. It's funny he seemed to become rather hostile before I left. I sat in my gas guzzling car and laughed at his expression.

It is my one indulgence, unless you count my gender expression as another, that and being warm when the weather is cold and having a full stomach and as long as the insurance companies continue paying for my services, I don't intend to change either my Jaguar or lifestyle. Stephanie eventually conned me into buying her car, though the insurance cost is ridiculous, she had a Mini for a year or so until she swapped it for a Mazda MX-5. I only agreed when she coughed up half the insurance costs. She gets a small reduction because her insurance thinks she is female, which we haven't remedied, because despite the legal ruling, we consider ourselves female and stuff the TERFs.

I mentioned the oil executive because apart from pissing him off as much as I could, I had a lead on his stolen antique, in fact, antiques would be more accurate, as he'd lost quite a few while he was on holiday. The major one was a Ming vase worth millions, but he also lost amongst other things a Louis XIV desk, a very beautiful escritoire, and it was on this that Stephanie found a possible lead, which Mike confirmed looked interesting. If we could recover it and the other treasures, we could be due a very large payout. It tends to focus the attention a little. Yeah okay, if the rest of the world has sold out to Mammon, then in order to survive we have to, to some extent do the same. I like to think, I do it minimally, after all, the insurance companies set the rewards or fees they pay, I just solve the puzzles and pocket the fees.

The vase was up for sale at an auction, the description was poor as was the photograph, and the value of the lot was nowhere near its true value, over a million pounds, they were selling, incorrectly as Tan dynasty and for one hundred thousand, still you'd need some pocket money to buy it and it was likely to go to an American and be exported but then that would be on dodgy documents. I went to look over the auction lots and it was our oily character's Ming, I'd try not to drop it it on the way home. Waiting my call was a police officer who would come and spoil all the fun. The desk was also there, a far prettier item than the vase, or in my eyes it was, but again, I only get paid for those recovered intact, pity, if it could have fallen of the back of a police car, it would look lovely in my study or boudoir as I tend to call it.

The police came as I called and the auction was disrupted, Stephanie, however, was hot in pursuit of the rich American who was after the vase and disappeared as the police entered. We didn't know if he had broken any laws at this point, I just has sneaking suspicion that he had and I wanted to stop him getting away without the police having had a chat with him. They told me he knew the owner who had lost the treasures and they were walking on the basis that these things were stolen to order and then 'laundered' by the auction as other items, of high value but well under the original worth or insurance valuation. There was no evidence of collaboration between the two oil men, but it couldn't be discounted at this point, as we knew they knew each other and were at least acquaintances.

Stephanie phoned me from outside Gatwick airport, which has flights direct to the US and the police I was liaising with at the auction house, contacted the airport police to pick him up if he tried to board a plane, the immigration people would do the actual stopping or Border Force or whatever they are called this week. I doubt they were paid enough for the at times unpleasant job they had to do. Stephanie had watched him hand in his hire car, a nice BMW, and we hoped he wouldn't try to escape by hiring another car. The airport police went round all the car hire firms telling them not to rent him anything because he was wanted in connection with a case being run from Scotland Yard and were to notify the police immediately if he tried. Stephanie drove back to the office then, as he was well and truly stymied and she left in case there was any violence. The police are trained for it, insurance investigators, aren't.

Although, I do recall in the early days of her transition, she was out with some school friends and coming back from the cinema when a couple of boys approached the girls and made unwanted overtures. Stephanie being Stephanie, told them to push off, when one of the boys tried to hit her for being the mouthy one, she parried his blow and broke his wrist, he didn't want to go on the ground which is where we usually put them with this particular move. Alas he resisted and she broke his wrist, at this point I arrived and so did the police. Took me a little time to talk her out of prosecution although all the witnesses said he swiped at her first. As a punishment I made her relearn the move properly, she was usually so good, so what went wrong or could it have been a combination of a clash of personalities. He was determined to resist her, so she taught him a lesson which would have hurt.

The US oilman was arrested trying to board a plane to the States and played hell with emigration / police at the airport trying to make out he was a personal friend of the Home secretary. I had a feeling if he had been, it was unlikely to be extant now, given he was suspected of trying to defraud and knowingly receive stolen goods.

It transpired that the auctioneers knew where some of the other items were shipped to auction them in Manchester. We also discovered the US oilman had a whole collection of things like paintings or vases or sculptures that had been stolen from all over America and Europe. British insurance companies weren't involved with the stuff abroad but I was paid a commission because it was my suggestion that the police over there checked his collection and the fake provenances for most of his collection. We did quite nicely out of that commission and it also brought the name of my firm into contact with new agencies who seemed quite impressed with my efforts.

Stephanie received a bonus at the end of it and despite my desire to drop oilman's vase I didn't, he got all his stuff back and the insurance company got all their money back. I heard a few months later he had knocked it over while dusting it. Cost him thousands to rebuild and it would never be the same value again. I think he got something from the insurance but it was nowhere near a million. The most expensive thing I possess is my house or my car, priceless things which I have guardianship boils down to one, Stephanie and because she used her car to track that bloke back to Gatwick, I managed to renegotiate her car insurance to about half. She was pleased with that and I suddenly became her favourite 'Auntie Eve' again. Nice to know I have some uses. She asked me why I hadn't done it before and I told her I had to time it just right and catch the senior exec of the insurance company who I saved a pile for and was feeling comfy after having a nice lunch when I asked him if he could help me with her car insurance, as she had used her car in tailing a suspect. He agreed it without checking what her car was as sports cars are usually dearer than family cars. Anyway, all's well that ends well, said the Bard and who am I to disagree with him.

*Number 11 Downing Street, the official home of the Chancellor of the Exchequer.