The Recoverer (5).
by
Angharad.
I had been asked to do a talk to a woman's club about my job. I hadn't agreed because I wasn't sure that I had enough anecdotes to keep them entertained. When I'd asked the organiser why she wanted me, she said," Well, we like to see women running their own businesses successfully and I'm told you are successful."

"I'm doing okay, I suppose, but much of my work is boring research or long hours of watching people we suspect. It's like watching paint dry."

"I'm sure it's more interesting than that, I'm sure a pretty woman like you has lots of tales to tell." I sometimes wonder if it's too late to go back to being male or whether I should go on and have surgery and live entirely like a female, including the possibility of some intimacy with a partner - thought of which variety I hadn't decided, mainly because I haven't decided which way I swing, as they say.

It was quiet and I was able to look through some past diaries. I'd conducted 24 cases in as many months, some had been quick like the opportunist strike at the awards ceremony that I'd been able to interfere in and keep Tom Cruise's partner's jewellery safe, but it was all serendipity, I was just the right person at the right time to stop the robbery. It still niggled me that I'd hit a woman but she had fired a taser at me. I'd made my mind up a long time ago if someone aims a firearm at me, I take whatever action I deem is necessary to survive, I included tasers in that category because they can do nasty things to you, including causing heart attacks and strokes to the susceptible, that sounds pretty serious to me, so they get my aggression to minimise its effect on yours truly. I want to live long enough to retire when I get older, this is no business for old men or women.

I've done 24 different types of case in the last couple of years, often for insurance companies and sometimes after someone else has had a go and failed. We are often called after the police have had an investigation about a theft or robbery and drawn a blank. I get called in as a cold case specialist. That can involve lots of research and watching suspects. Sometimes I can continue after the police give up because the public purse limit has been exceeded. I have enough reserves to take the hit for continued investigation longer than our public servants, which is why I succeed where they don't always. Sometimes it's a question of just being patient, in my experience so far, all criminals eventually give themselves away, we just have to be patient. That is sometimes difficult because the insurer is setting deadlines and that can depend on what has been stolen as some things have greater longevity than others and some are very short. Lives can be that way

I don't discount luck, I don't believe in it but won't turn it away because we all have some luck at times, even when it's all bad. It's pure happenstance but it happens to crooks as well and occasionally they even believe it or are superstitious and if they think they are up against a winner, then they give up. My record is impressive and I tend to talk it up as do the police, because it's like any contest, you have to get into your opponent's head - then you can play all sorts of games with them, it's good fun.

So my degrees in psychology and criminology support me beyond the realms of the obvious and into those of metaphysics or so it seems to some. Are my hunches something beyond or just intuition? I don't know but I can say female intuition with my fingers crossed and people believe me - I mean what more could I want?

I look around at politicians who say the most outlandish things but people believe them or accept them - why? Do they not have common sense, when someone is telling you the most outrageous porkies shouldn't you challenge them. I see in Kent a newly won Reform council is removing all transgender books from the libraries because they say it's common sense. It's not it's persecution but fascists never see it that way - it's like evangelicals, black and white but sets the understanding of people's motives back by many years. I suspect most would have been happy during the Mediaeval period or living among the Taliban, maybe the rest of us could arrange a holiday for them?

Seems I picked the wrong time to live as a woman because apparently someone born as male can't change according to the Supreme Court, that doesn't agree with the science and they haven't admitted it's all politically driven by the money of an overpaid hack whose prose is excessive and puerile, but that's a different argument and I don't get challenged in toilets, so I shall continue to wend my way into the edges of what's acceptable legally or socially. In other words, sod off JK, I'll carry on regardless.

I was meeting a negotiator, as they like to call themselves, it's a bit posher than fence or stolen goods holder, which is what they are. I have a figure that I can go to but the cheaper the better, so it pays me to keep the money as low as possible, then the insurers pay it to me not a criminal. Easy to understand a bit like playing poker, everyone understands the rules but few are good at it, most of us have reveals or shows which show what we're thinking and how good our hand is and give the game away.

I have no interest in poker or gambling, both are a tax on stupidity but negotiating is not once I convince them to accept my offer and feel happy with it. I always use public areas which can allow some privacy without being dangerous, remember I'm presenting as a woman and some men feel intimidation is permissible, I do my best to inform them it isn't but some don't learn. I also announce I am leaving and will instruct my successors of the threat and make the price they'll allow, less. The insurers don't like intimidation as a tactic and will usually support me but there is the odd lone wolf operator who has no scruples and will negotiate with anyone, they get bottom prices and get us all a bad name. I'm helping the police with case of one such operator who turned up in a river with no wallet or ID documents and rather dead.

To start with, if you are negotiating you don't carry money, the insurers will deal with that after, if you do, you might be relieved of it without achieving much at all. Which is what we think happened to our deceased colleague - I use the term advisedly. I had been involved earlier and declined the offer, it was too high with too little profit for me to waste my time, I told them so and we each left - it happens. Then I heard there was a lone wolf trying to raise the matter again. Then we heard of the river occupant. I heard it all on the grapevine, which can be inaccurate but often isn't and operates very quickly.

The police eventually suspected who the victim was and why they had been killed. Then they came to me. I do some liaison for them and they scratch my back. First I knew of it I had DC Cowan call at my office, he was lucky to find me home. "Looking good, Eve."

"Thank you, Ron," I replied, "Now as you're happily married, you've come a long way to impart a compliment."

"You forgot the two daughters, who keep me poor."

"Oh poor, Ron," I pretended to play the fiddle. "So what d'you want then?" He already had a coffee, he's a real caffeine addict.

"This punter in the Isis."

"What he rows does he?"

"No, only floats a bit now."

"Oh, so who is he?"

"Damon Arkrwright."

"Can't have been much of an ark-wright then, unless he fell overboard."

"We understand he might have been one of your lot - an insurance negotiator but not one operating on behalf of an insurance company."

"You mean a free-lance or lone wolf?"

"In a word." The detective wasn't sure what to say next.

"What was he negotiating for?"

"The jewel heist where the shop assistant was shot dead."

"No one in their right mind negotiates with killers."

"I think he was trying to break into the insurance element by doing jobs you well established people won't touch."

"He left a widow and kid." My face fell, don't these people look at risks and robbers who kill, who are carrying guns, you keep away from and hope the police get them eventually.

"I'll ask for whip round for them, I hope he was insured." I made a note, we have a widows and orphans fund, people do occasionally lose their lives at it but we try to train negotiators properly. There is always one who slips through but we all feel sorry for any relatives, especially children, they have no choice, do they.

Cowan left after his third coffee and we agreed to meet again in a few days where we would both try and find anything of relevance to share, he would have visited the widow and have her take on it. I would also have visited after talking with colleagues to get her an interim payment to tide her over, we all need money - a fact of life.

I also spoke to several colleagues and got the low down on the case, although none would share with the plod unless one of theirs got killed, then there were no boundaries. My coffee jar took a hit again five days later when Ron Cowan called again to see what I had on his case. It wasn't much but he told me the labs had identified the gun that killed the unfortunate shop assistant. It had killed before.

"So we have a gun that's doing the rounds or a shooter whose killed before?"

"Yep," he replied pouring his second coffee.

"The word on the street is that it was poorly planned, there should have been no guns but one of the thugs had one. The assistant tried to press the alarm and he shot her. How much was lost?"

"About 2 Million."

"Lot of jewellery to fence."

"Yeah, almost certainly will be broken up and sold piecemeal."

"What about the bloke in the river?"

"Probably out of his depth, quite literally."

"Only an idiot would try to deal with that?"

Somebody has to."

"Not until it's been broken up. They've sent me a list, some good stones in amongst it."

"Will you be investigating?"

"Not if they have guns - I loathe the things."

"Don't we all," said my plod friend.

Just then my computer peeped I looked at what came through by email and printed it off. I highlighted a couple of items and showed it to my friend.

"What are you showing me?" he asked.

"Some of the items from the shooting. Looks like they've been made smaller."

"You sure?"

"Not entirely but once I see them I'll know. It's too quick, someone is panicking and wants to get rid of them. If there's blood on them some may see them as cursed and want to hurry, probably the best chance you have of catching them."

"You gonna negotiate for them?"

"Want me to."

"Bloody hell, yes."

"Until I see the stones I won't be certain, if it's them I'll know."

"When?"

"Hang on, I have to work a few things out with the insurers, as there is shooter involved it'll be premium rate. If you just happened to follow me and use the CCTV into the room I'll be using, you can strike as we breakup and you'll have hard evidence, I'll try and draw him for you, but I need to see the stones first. I'll probably decline, blood on them etc., then they're all yours."

It took a few days to set up, everyone was nervous and at the first sign of trouble I was out. When the meeting was scheduled, I brought along my loupe, a times ten lens which should enable me to see all I needed to identify the stones. I also had my earlier list and instructions from my insurance company on what I could bid, I suggested it wasn't my thing, involving shooters.

On the Thursday morning I arranged to meet their representative at a hotel lounge and was early, but not as early as the police. I had discussed with them how we would play it. The negotiator would not have been involved in the robbery but would have since learned things, especially as they had been on the TV and in the press. So the plan was for the police to follow him, if necessary for a few days. I would also wrap them up in a cloth which acted as a transponder and which they could use as a tracker in case they lost him. After that it was up to Cowan and his friends to net them. I had warned him that the jewels had been broken up but what they wanted was the bloke with the gun, murder was worth more points than robbery, but armed robbery with a murder was worth far more. If Cowan pulled it off it would put him in the good books of the hierarchy of the Met and wouldn't do me any harm either for cooperating with them on a sting.

The chap arrived looking more like a banker than a villain, still I suppose bankers are just sophisticated villains, I suppose he could have been a lawyer. He seemed confident and asked if I was able to negotiate, I assured him I could but I'd need to see samples of what he was selling. We had coffee and he drew out a small cloth bag and tipped things into a small glass dish. They looked the real thing the shine that was coming of them, these were good quality stones.

I spent ages examining the stones, they were the ones off my list that had been taken from the jeweller's shop along with a couple from an earlier robbery.

"You happy that they are genuine."

"Oh yeah, very nice stones but not worth someone's life."

"What'd'you mean?"

"These are part of the haul from the London jewellers where the woman was shot."

"No they're not, my client wouldn't have been involved in such a thing."

"Sorry, despite them being broken up, they are so you'd better tell your client that, my company doesn't negotiate with murderers, so sorry to have wasted your time. But no one will negotiate with you once my report goes in."

"How can I stop that happening?"

"You have to be joking, I won't touch those stones because they have blood on them."

"Not even for a reduced price?"

"I won't touch them, goodbye." I picked up my brief case and stood up and left. There was no hand shake I refused to touch him.

He phoned his client and the whole conversation was recorded by the police, my tracker was in his bag and they followed him to his office and laid on a telephone tap and a screening device in case he used his mobile.

Two days later the man with the gun was shot dead by marksmen, he still had the gun, all of the gang were arrested although much of the jewellery was already sent off to the Netherlands.

The police were happy with the outcome and I got a commission for examining the stones, nothing like as much if we had actually recovered them but I was able to tell the police that the two other stones which I'd seen were from an earlier heist and so they had them for two robberies and I got a reward for that. So all round it was a success for the forces of law and order and me and something to regale this women's club next week. I might just give then what they want, I might...