Mommy, mommy, mommy. Chapter 5

A few days after the now-infamous Pool Party I went to the campus to see Dr.Z and Josie. It turns out I was more satisfied that I thought I would be. Not only did Duane get totally humiliated but I heard from others that he left school and went home. My hope was that now he won’t be preying on other females anymore.

I felt a tap on my shoulder and Josie was there, smiling. We hugged and I asked how she and her newborn son was doing.

I was so glad to hear her son, Sam, was doing better and that he might be able to go home in a couple weeks. That was the best news! I've been so worried about her and her baby!

"I was so happy you won the beauty contest, it is certainly a validation of your progress. My, haven't you've come a long way!” she said.

"That was certainly wasn't what I was expecting when I entered, that’s for sure! I just entered so I would have a way to get back at Duane."

Josie said, "Well you certainly did do that, and how! That jerk won't be menacing women anymore, that's for sure!"

We walked over, out of the way, so we could discuss what really ended up happening with Duane. I only knew that Dr. Z provided me the things I thought I needed to get back at Duane. I knew I had to drug him and touch his awful thing but I wasn't sure what would really happen.

"Well, Dr.Z was quite upset when you told us what had happened to you. I have never seen him that angry. When you told us of your idea for revenge, to emasculate Duane in public somehow, he spent most of that night and the next day working on something that he thought would work. Having a quick response time was critical so he refined and simplified it. Basically it uses the same techniques that he used for us but but the results were much less detailed. The first pill he told you to give him was to make him drowsy, the second one was to change his voice."

"That voice change was a stroke of genius, by the way," I smiled.

"Wasn't it, though!"

"Anyway, the lotion is what really did the trick. Using his nano technology he developed what quickly and painlessly remade, in 60 minutes, what used to be Duane's pride and joy into the shape resembling, but not functioning, the female labia, complete with clitoris. Unfortunately, in order to make this work you did have to stroke him and that step couldn't be avoided. His formula ensured that having it on your hand would have no affect on you since it only reacted to testosterone, which you no longer produce. The genius of it all is he made sure there wasn't a vagina, just the semblance of a clitoris and labial folds but no opening except a tiny pee hole. He also deadened the nerve so there would be no clitoral sensitivity. Duane will not be able to feel any sort of pleasure down there! Not only that but he will have to 'pee like a girl' for the rest of his miserable life. I guarantee Duane will feel humiliated every time he has to urinate.

I couldn't believe it. This was much more than I could possible have wished for. Duane got what he deserved, I got my revenge. If he should come back and start trouble he will have a hard time trying to find a girl named 'Debbie' since the whole Pool Party thing was unsanctioned by the school. There was no record of any names. The could try and find 'girl #8' but good luck there. The school also didn't have a record of any Carli Jane Thomas. If he tried to find a JT or James Thomas who was on a swimming scholarship he would find that that this James Thomas person quit school and left no forwarding address. It will be Duane’s word against someone who no longer exists.

I knew I would miss Josie and Dr.Z dearly but I would have to go back once a year for checkups so I knew I would still see them. I also didn’t want to wait and see if Devin would come back to me. I wanted a fresh start. Josie was very sad to hear of my plans to move away but totally understood, so did Dr.Z. Josie was my best friend, confidant and guide, more like a sister than a friend, actually. Her son, Sam, was doing much better now and was able to go home which lifted Josie's spirits. I told her that I was just going to move to the city so it wasn't like I was moving cross-country and I could visit on weekends. Of course we cried together again but they were tears of sadness mixed with joy. We laughed when we both saw our mascara'd eyes were a mess. What a wonderful friend she is! While she was carrying her baby we hung out together like best friends do, watching chick flicks or giving each other mani-pedis, but most of the time we talked about getting pregnant, having babies and, of course, men.

Dr.Z was stoic, as usual, but I detected a little bit of sadness in his eyes. He didn't tear up but almost. I hugged him tight and he actually hugged back. That was a first! Then he got serious and told me what to do if there were any problems along the way. I decided that this was a good time to tell him my first period had started and I was so relieved, finally but there was that tinge of sadness that I hadn’t gotten pregnant by Devin after all.

"Ah, your menarche, that is good news indeed," he said.

I looked at him, confused. "My what, my malarkey?"

"Oh, sorry, men-ar-key, it's pronounced. It means your first
menstruation."

He said this was excellent news and proved that my uterus was in working order and, as he said, we celebrated! I had never seen him so animated. He opened a desk drawer and pulled out a small bottle of champagne and the 3 of us toasted my good news. He even took my hand and we even danced a bit. Then all 3 of us danced together! I felt so happy! He told me to be sure to let him know when I did get pregnant and that he wanted me to come in for regular checkups, regardless. I told him he would be the first to know when I get pregnant. Well maybe the 2nd, after Josie. When I went to leave I kissed Dr.Z on the cheek he surprised not only me but Josie as he kissed my cheek in return! I’m going to miss him, and Josie, so much.

My period was a bit of a surprise, as I guess it sometime can be. I was very glad it didn't happen any earlier, like when I was in my bikini! It did end up starting just a few days after when I experienced some unexpected dampness. Sure enough, spotting! Perhaps I am one of the few girls who was actually excited, and relieved, to have my first period. Luckily I was prepared. I went to my medicine cabinet and retrieved my
first tampon and inserted as instructed. It was a bit uncomfortable at first and the string hanging out of my vagina looked a bit silly but then I just forgot about the tampon being inside me until I remembered it was time to replace it. By the second day it was almost routine until I had a sharp pain and experienced my first cramps. It was a mixed blessing for sure. It was just another sign that my reproductive system was working but....Oooh, cramping hurt!

My uterus suffered but my mind was ecstatic! This was undeniable proof that I was now, and through the rest of my life, a complete female. It was the biggest step in the growth of myself as a complete woman, so far. The final step would be, of course, giving birth. I'll shared this occasion with females everywhere, for all time, and am so glad to be a part of the glory of womanhood.

A few days later I got a text from Devin. "am headed back 4 a week, would luv to c u, dev." I wasn't sure what to make of this. Is he coming back just to see me or is he coming back to stay? "to stay or just visit?" I messaged back.

I didn't hear anything back from him so I just got busy packing my things. I realized I needed to either buy a used car or hire a moving company.

My wardrobe had grown considerably. It turns out I really loved wearing dresses so I bought way too many although almost all were from resale stores. And shoes! Now I see the attraction. Heels, flats, boots, sandals of all sorts of styles, colors and heel heights. At first I was unsure about wearing heels. I wobbled around in a pair with Josie hanging on to my arm so I wouldn't fall. She said everyone did the same thing the first time in heels. With practice, and proper fitting, I hoped to be able to wear them all day, if I had to, eventually.

Devin's text and non-response puzzled me. I wanted to see him again but since I was planning on moving what was I to do? Do I postpone my move so I could see him or just get on with my life and tell him I am in the process of moving. It also dawned on me that I had never told him of my past. It would only be fair to tell him if we were going to have any kind of relationship but, then, didn't we already have a relationship, a very passionate one, at that? Since he was my first, and only, man I felt I owed him something either way. I called Josie for advise, she would know.

"Hi Jos, how are you and the family?"

She answered, "Hi Carli, we are all doing great, thanks! What's up?"

"Well I heard from Devin a while ago and I wanted to ask you what you thought it meant."

I read it to her and she said, "Hm, cryptic isn't it?"

"That's what I thought. I sent him a response a couple hours ago and he hasn't answered."

"Do you want to see him?" she wondered.

"I do but the timing isn't the best and there is another problem. I didn't tell him about my past and if it gets serious that might become an issue. Does Michael know about you?"

"I told him after we had been dating for awhile and we wanted to get physical, you know? I told him and he said that he was totally surprised, couldn't believe I used to be a guy but that he fell in love with the girl I am, not the person I used to be."

"Wow, how romantic!"

"I know! That's when I let myself fall in love with him."

"I guess if I tell Devin and he can't handle it then that would be that."

"True," she said, "or you could not tell him and he probably would never know."

"I thought about trying that but I wouldn't want to start a relationship by hiding something like that."

"My thoughts, exactly, Carli. Either he can't handle it and will leave or he can and then you can rest easy."

A while later I received another text from Devin. "i'm here, can i come over?" Bad timing if there ever was. Not only was I packing up and looking for a place to live but I had just started my period and I felt very emotional about all this.

"I didn't know U mean 2day. my place is a mess. what happened to your old place?"

He responded right away this time. "Rented it, i don't mind a mess."

I didn't see I had much choice. "Give me an hour then come, k?”
"Got it."

Now what was I going to do? The mess is one thing but I really wished we could make love again. I was just going to make the best of it. I straightened up as best as I could, put on some decent clothes, put my hair in a bun and slapped on some lip gloss.

He buzzed and I let him in. He looked a little worn for wear but very tan and fit. What am I saying, he looked delicious!

I went to him and hugged and kissed. It felt so good to be in his arms. It felt so natural to be in a man's embrace. A man's scent was intoxicating.

We didn't say anything for a minute or two and then he looked around and said, "I like what you've done with the place." I playfully punched his chest.

"I missed you, babe, he said."

"Me, too, I missed you so much. I'm glad you're back. Are you going to stay for long?

"Well, that depends."

"On what?" I asked.

"Oh, I'll tell you later but first I gotta have something to eat. Let me take you out for some lunch."

"Um, sure. I need to tell you something too but first I need to get my self together a bit," I said.

"Carli, are you kidding, you look great. C'mon grab your coat. This place isn't fancy at all. I mean, look at me. I've been on a plane for 10 hours and then came right here." I was looking and drooling at this handsome man.

"OK, I am a bit hungry."

It was a very different kind of place he took me to. I was never an adventurous eater and we went to this Vietnamese restaurant where I had no idea what to expect, but I had to trust him, right? I mean I got Thai takeout occasionally but it was always the same, boring thing, Pad Thai, one star.

Then restaurant wasn't fancy at all, more like somebody's home. The people were so nice and the waitresses were gorgeous, tiny with beautiful black hair and lovely skin. Everybody who worked there knew Devin. He ordered, of course. We had some delicious, exotic tasting foods but I was so fixated on Devin I couldn't you what we had. I was just hoping I didn't eat any bugs.

After our meal I brought up my question again, "So Devin, now can you tell me how long you are staying?”

"Well, I have a return ticket for early next week. What I want to ask you, though, is if you would like to go with me to Puerto Rico?"

This took me totally by surprise and I said so.

"I know I probably shouldn't have sprung it on you like this but while I was gone I couldn't get you out of my mind. He put his hand on mine and said, "You captivate me, Carli! There is something so fascinating about you and I want to get to know what it is about you that makes me go half-crazy. I love my work and I think I am very good at it but even so, I had to concentrate on not thinking about you just so I could do my job."

I stared wide-eyes at him for a minute before I could speak. “I'm stunned! I had no idea you felt that way about me. I mean we hardly know each other but, to tell you the truth I feel the same. While you were gone I thought about you constantly."

Looking intently he said "We have a week to decide. Will you please think about it. I admit I will be very busy some days but there will be some down time too. We can play in the surf, explore an amazing country with wonderful people. I think you would really like it."

"Wow, Devin, this is a big deal for me. I just had a pretty remarkable week which included me deciding to give up school and go to work and then you show up with this fantastic offer. I will certainly give it thorough consideration. It sounds like quite an invitation."

"Fair enough," he said, "but how about we leave here and hopefully go back to your place and you can tell me about your remarkable week."

I so wanted to tell him the truth about my past but his invitation threw me for a loop. So much to think about and so little time.

When I unlocked my door the reality hit me. My stuff was everywhere and the place was a mess! My clothes were in one pile, my shoes in another. Most of my books were stacked up as was my laundry. Half my kitchen ware was already packed. To top it off my bed was covered in maps and brochures along with notes of where I might want to move to. I moved stuff around so we could at least sit down. Before we sat he took me by the hand, turned me towards himself, then embraced me as kissed me
passionately. I almost became dizzy!

I then said, "Who needs to sit?" as I pulled him towards the bedroom and guided him on top of me as I lay on my back, right on top of my mess of maps and brochures. It felt so wonderful to be so close to someone like this. He began to unbutton my blouse and my chest was heaving in anticipation. He reached into my blouse and placed his warm, rough hands on my breasts and I involuntarily arched my back towards him. He kissed me on the lips again and then made his way down my body. His whiskers accidentally scratched across my nipple as he sucked in them and I squealed in delight. He unzipped my skirt, pulled it down and kissed and licked his way down my legs. Squirming in desire as he reached to pull my panties down I suddenly realized I was having my period. I suddenly sat up and said, "Oh no, we can't. I just remembered it's my period. I’m so sorry, I totally forgot!"

He sat up, smiled and said, "Hey, that's OK, we'll have plenty of time for lovemaking in the tropics!"

I sat up, reached out and began to stroked him. I didn't say anything, just smiled wickedly, and lowered myself down, licking my lips. I tried to not think about what Duane did to me. This was totally different and this I wanted to do! I kissed the head, pursed my lips together and slowly took him in. I loved the feeling when the head passed by my lips. He was so hot and hard as I made my way down along his length. It felt so good in my mouth, so hot, hard and oh so right! I couldn't get him all in so I made a fist around the base and pumped him with my hand and my mouth (a tip from Josie). I could hear him moaning, telling me how good it felt which only made me more excited. Unconsciously I reached down with my other hand and, finding my clitoris I made myself moan despite the tampon string getting in the way. He placed his hands on my head and he held it has he began to thrust in and out of my mouth. His movements became faster, deeper when he tensed up and I felt his glorious manhood throb in my mouth and his hot, creamy gift filled me to my throat. I tried to suck every last drop out of him and then sat up gasping and swallowed every drop. So exciting! Now I knew how wonderful it felt to take a man and pleasure him orally when he exploded into my mouth.

While I was sitting up he reached down and began to play with my clitoris, ignoring my tampon string. It didn't take long before I began to feel my body tremble as waves of pleasure flowed through me from my toes to my head and back again. Exhausted, we both fell back on the maps and laughed each other silly.

We must have fallen asleep in each other's arms but when I woke up the bed was empty next to me. At first I though maybe it was all a dream but then I heard noises coming from the kitchen. I pulled on his t-shirt that said "Puerto Rico, Si!" on the front. It smelled like him and I liked how big his shirt was on me. I went out to see what was going on and found him fixing breakfast, dressed only in his boxer undershorts. I came up from behind and wrapped my arms around him. He turned around and we kissed the kiss of lovers.

"Hello, my handsome hunk of man!" I said proudly.

"Hola, mi chica bonita," he said which I hoped meant Hello pretty girl. "Just think, we could wake up like this every day if you went with me."

"That would just about every girl's dream," I said.

Our breakfast was quite yummy with scrambled eggs, toast and OJ. I had to apologize for my lack of coffee since I started going to my local espresso shop instead, thanks to him for pointing out the difference.

After breakfast Devin went to do some personal stuff so I took the opportunity to go visit Josie and her baby boy, Sam. Part of the reason for visiting them was so I could hold and cuddle with her baby. Josie just handed him over like he was a loaf of bread and I was petrified that I might drop him but all that fear washed away as felt this tiny human nestled in my arms. I loved the way he smelled and all the cute sounds he made. When he smiled at me I felt such joy and found the entire interaction to be very soothing.

"You look like a just another mom," she said, smiling.

"I can't believe how natural this feels. This is what I have always wanted and needed but didn't know it until now. Thank you so much for making this so possible!"

"I thought you would have made a perfect mother the first time I saw you. You had this, for lack of a better term, maternal look. By that I mean you seemed so compassionate and warm. Like a mother should!"

"Oh, Josie, thank you so much for everything! I owe you so much!"
.
We hugged although I was afraid of squishing little Sam but Josie just laughed and said, "Oh, Carli, babies come out of chute as tough little customers."

"That brings up a question, what about our lady parts? It seems like they will be going through a lot. Did you have any difficulties."

"No, since he was so tiny at birth he just kinda slipped right out of me. At least that's what I was told. I was out of it. Actually I kinda missed having a true childbirth and the long and painful as it could have been. I'm sure most mom would like the kind of painless delivery I had but I feel I missed out on having a true labor experience."

"Well I suppose that would be true. I mean I really don't know what to expect when it is my turn."

Of course Josie wanted all the details of my visit from Devin which I was more than proud to share with her. She knew I was on my period so she asked "I assume you still managed to have a little fun with him."

Of course I had to told her everything and how much I liked it. She smiled, knowingly. I also told her about his offer for me to follow him to Puerto Rico and she was excited for me. "A tropical vacation for you, lucky girl!"

"Yes, the timing is bad but I think I really want to do this. He and I could really get to know each other."

She said, "This might the the opportunity of a lifetime. You could come back all rested, tanned and, maybe, with a pregnant belly!

"That's what I was thinking, the pregnant part, for sure," I replied. He seems to be such a caring, responsible guy and we get along so well. He is so worldly compared to me."

"It isn't up to me but maybe you should do it, Carli, or you may regret it later."

"I know, I worry about regretting not going." We chit-chatted for a couple of hours then went home to get my apartment organized a little better since he might be staying with me for the night.

With the departure looming just a day away I made the decision that I would go with him. Also my period had passed and I really wanted him to make love to me and I tried to pretty myself up a bit. I curled my hair, wore a bit more makeup than usual, did my nails and then put on a dress I bought for such an occasion. It showed much more cleavage than I usually do, mid-thigh in length and quite tight. I'm pretty sure he would get
the idea. I stepped into my highest heels and then checked myself way too many times in the mirror.

BUZZ! I pressed the intercom and told him the door was open. When he walked through the door his eyes grew wide. "My god, you are a vision of beauty! May I assume it is for my benefit?

”Yours and yours alone! as I slinked (as if I knew how to slink) over to him and wrapped my arms around his neck and pressed my body against him. He responded by lifting me up and kissing me deeply. I parted my lips and his tongue slid in and probed inside my mouth. He tried to send his tongue deeper and I adjusted my jaw more and felt his tongue tickling the back of my throat.

I could feel his bulge straining against my vulva, even through his pants. I let loose of his neck and slid down his body until I was on my knees. Quickly undoing his pants I licked my lips and, grasping his growing manhood I kissed the tip and was pleased to see my lipstick print on the head. I parted my lips more, and slid my tongue between my lower lip and his shaft and proceeded to lick every inch of his rock-hard shaft. My face was pressed against his belly as I carefully opened my throat and took him in completely. I was so proud I could do such a thing.

I was careful, though, to not stimulate him too much as I had other needs to be filled. I slowly relaxed and felt every inch of him slide out of my throat and pass through my lips as I sucked it all the way out.

"Carli, that felt so amazing! It was so deep that I thought you might swallow me whole!"

I smiled at him wickedly and said, "I'll work on that. And now it's your turn!"

With that he easily picked me up in his arms and carried me to the bed (I had moved the maps this time), and gently laid me down and I pulled up my dress, completely exposing my panties. With his fingers he slid my panties off, put my legs over his shoulders and proceeded to kiss and probe my femaleness. He slid his tongue down my slit but not before licking my clitoris. His tongue reached my eager, wet vagina and he slid it inside my vagina. It felt amazing! I wished I could have been experiencing this feeling for years. He continued probed inside me, stopping occasionally to take a deep sniff of the aroma of my feminine secrets. With his fingers he teased my clitoris until I thought I would pass out. My lover certainly knew what he was doing!

Not wanting to ruin my dress Devin helped me pull it over my head. I wasn't wearing a bra so my breasts bounced playfully as he fully undressed me. He laid me down and proceeded to knead one breast then the other. His fingers expertly tweaked each nipple and then grew erect as he suckled each one. I became very wet down below and I pulled him down to me. I spread my legs and guided him into my folds.

Suddenly he stopped, said, "Wait, I better glove up."

I wasn't sure what he meant at first but then he pulled a condom out of his pants pocket. I grabbed the condom out of his hands and tossed it to the floor and opened myself to him.

He looked into my eyes and I'm sure he knew what I wanted. He felt familiar inside. He began to glide in and out of me and I tried to match his rhythms. He seemingly grew thicker, longer and hotter with each stroke. I moaned in pleasure as he would pull nearly out, causing me to squirm in anticipation, and then slide completely back up and in, and again! His movements became faster, more intense and I struggled to keep up. He was totally in command of me and I loved it. Waves of pleasure coursed through my body as he continued his charge. When I felt he was close I tried a trick that Josie mentioned and tried to tightened the muscles of my vagina around his shaft. He let out a great moan as copious amounts of his soldiers headed for my waiting womb. Exhausted, we both collapsed in spent pleasure. Secretly, I was smiling to myself thinking, "Did I just get impregnated?"

Finally I sat up, threw a robe around myself, and went to pee. As I walked I felt some of his baby batter run out of me and down my leg which made me a little sad, I wanted all his semen inside me. I wiped some off with my finger and then licked it off, savoring his manly taste. I climbed back on to the bed and crawled on top of Devin. He was so warm, so fit and firm. I was amazed how different our bodies are and even more amazed that my body used to look more like his. I was so glad to be different. We kissed some more and felt him stir down below. I reached down and gently tickled his scrotum and was pleased that he sprang right back to attention!

I moved my head down, licked the head of his manliness while I continued to fondle his crotch. He obviously liked what I was doing. I parted my lips and slid down past the ridge of his cock and then back out. I think we both liked how that felt! I slowly took him as far as I could go. I held it in my mouth as I looked up at him. He had the most wonderful smile. I gave him a wink and slid back out just past the head. I kept my mouth open and smiled as I waited a few more seconds before closing my lips and sucking my cheeks out as I rode back down. After a few more of those I sense he was getting close so I wrapped my lips tightly and waited for my present. Suddenly a splash of his gift filled my mouth so I continued sucking. He moaned, "Carli-girl, wow just wow!

After he stop pulsing I moved off, opened my mouth and show him how much he gave me, and then I slowly swallowed every last drop. Quite possibly the best gift I've ever received. (Not there were many gifts at all before). I almost couldn't believe what I had just done but was so happy I did. It didn't taste bad, a little salty-like, and I was sure I would grow to like it and I was so pleased that I had his semen filling both my vagina and my mouth.

We took turns showering and then decided to go outside and enjoy the weather. We stopped at an ice cream shop and he bought two cones and we found a table and enjoyed our cool treat while we watched a mom, dad and their young child enjoying being a happy family. New I sighed deeply and he asked why.

"I'm just envious is all. I hope to be just like them."

He didn't say anything at first and then said, "Just so you know, I don't."

At first I thought he was kidding and I playfully punched him in the arm and said, "No, really, wouldn't you like to have a family?"

"Sorry, but no. Don't get me wrong, I love kids but there are so many orphans that need homes. It just doesn't seem right for me to make more."

The air just went out of me. All I could say was, "Oh," as I turned my head so he wouldn't see me trying to not cry but he heard me sniffle.

"I don't mean to offend, it's just my opinion. Orphans kids are a big reason I do what I do as work. I'm sorry if I...oh geez, were you thinking of me as a dad?"

I tried to make a joke of it and faked laughed, "With you? Don't flatter yourself." In reality the bottom just dropped out of my life. Nothing was said for a few minutes.

Ironically I was going to tell him that I loved him and wanted to go with him to Puerto Rico but now...instead I said, "You know I thought real hard about your offer but I don't think I will join you. It isn't the kind of life I'm looking for. Sorry."

He didn't say anything. He knew why I wouldn't go. When we got back he finally said, "Knowing you has been such a joy. When I said I didn’t want a family I meant one with kids. When you said I didn't need protection I figured you were using birth control. Aren't you?"

I didn't say anything so it was obvious I wasn't. "So I hope you weren’t just using me to get pregnant so I would have to marry you?"

I began crying. "No, I wouldn't force you to marry me, it's just that..." I whimpered.

"Just what? That kinda seems like what you were planning."

"Ok, yes, I did want to get pregnant but I wouldn't have forced you to marry me."

Devin thought for a minute, then said, "I always wanted to be a couple with someone, someone to grow old with. Someone I could love and trust so I thought maybe you might be her but I guess not."

I shook my head while tears poured down my face. "Maybe you should stay somewhere else tonight," he agreed.

He gave me a kiss on my head and got up and I stayed sitting, crying on the bench until it got dark and then went back home, alone.

I didn't know I could cry this much! I was so bad off I couldn't even talk to Josie who had been calling me for a week but I hadn't answered. What could I say except that I blew it. Plus I'd have to tell her I had unprotected sex, on purpose! What a dope I was. Devin was everything a girl could want and I think he liked me a lot too, maybe even loved me like I loved him but we wanted different things and now he's gone from my
life.

It had been 2 menstrual cycles in a row that I missed. I took a
maternity test and it read two bars, pregnant, sigh. I was so looking forward to it and should be so happy but now it seems like it might have been a big mistake.

What have I done? Already I'm a single mom! I went to an OB/GYN who confirmed it. I was a bit embarrassed to tell Dr.Z and Josie that I was so eager to have intercourse that I purposely did not use protection but suddenly something clicked in my brain. I realized that I shouldn't be so agitated because I was now 'with child'. No, I should be welcoming it instead! I mean wasn't getting pregnant the whole point?

Deciding to grow up and be a loving mother I placed my hands over my belly and told whoever was in there know that their mommy loves them and will love him or her forever. Even so I felt it was wasn't fair for my baby to not have a daddy.

I even gave thoughts that I should try dating, like one of those speed-dating clubs. Maybe there is some decent guy who wants to marry a ‘used' and pregnant woman but that seemed a bit desperate.

I ended up not moving. I also never unpacked. I did throw up from morning sickness but the knowledge that I was growing a baby in me kept me going.

Two weeks later I was still despondent about Devin. When I didn't answer the phone calls Dr.Z and Josie finally came over. They knocked on the door but when I didn't answer they told the manager that I needed to be checked out. He let them in and they were shocked! I was a mess. I looked horrid with big bags under my eyes, hair a rat's nest, stuff everywhere, my opened, tossed suitcase, tipped over glasses and cups. As soon as she saw me Josie put her arms around me and I bawled my head off. I was crying so hard my body was heaving. Dr. Z quickly administered a sedative and I quickly calmed down. I told them everything, what happened between Devin and I, about the sex, the picnic and then what Devin and I ended up telling each other and that he went back to Puerto Rico after I drove him away. Then I told them I was definitely pregnant and not sure how to feel about it.

Dr.Z and Josie looked at each other, nodded and then Dr.Z said, “Carli, my precious Carli. Remember early on in the program we said toward the end of it you will personally interact with various people in different situations? We said your reactions would be gauged for response. We think that you both exceeded our expectations. You see, Devin was also part of the program. He went through the same program as you only he started as a female. It wasn't until you told Josie his name was Devin that we realized who he really was. That the two of you would actually meet was not anticipated; it was totally spontaneous. When we heard you were dating him we were anxious of the outcome. We had provided his cover but his responses, his emotions were as true as yours.

Devin wasn't in Puerto Rico, he was here, always has been, or was. After you two broke up he disappeared. Like you, his attitude toward becoming the opposite gender was developed during his sessions but his attitude regarding children and fatherhood developed after he finished the program. We did anticipate your reaction but not his. We were not counting on the two of you falling in love as hard as you did.

I could not believe what I was hearing. This was all part of the program? Now I was an emotional wreck and it's pretty much their fault!

"We apologize that we let it get away from us. Obviously there are changes and criteria that need to be adjusted for the emotions portion of the program." They also said they had ceased Devin's program. Apparently testosterone is stubborn and too many anomalies had occurred.

On the other hand we are thrilled with the rest of your progress. The entire reason for this company and it's purpose is to perpetuate human existence. It is obvious from your results that you are totally invested in becoming pregnant and becoming a mother. If it is any satisfaction you might be pleased to know that you have now graduated from the program with the highest possible score. While that may not seem like much to you the parent company that is funding this is more than pleased. They have awarded you a $50,000 endowment. In addition, if you are willing, you can earn even more if you were to become the 'Spokesmother', for lack of a better term, for the company.

I said I appreciated the money but that wasn't as important to me as my, and my baby's, health. I told them I would have to think about being any kind of 'Spokesmother' and asked them to leave. I felt betrayed by both of them, especially Josie. She knew all along. She tried to apologize personally but I just shut the door behind them and, you guessed it, cried!

I wondered what would have happened if I had said "yes" to Puerto Rico since this whole thing was just a pretense. My best guess is that he would have figured out a way to squirm out of the whole deal and leave me hanging either way.

The next day I thought about Devin once being female. Again, I am amazed at Dr.Z's genius. I wasn't an expert in the male genitalia but Devin’s sure fooled me. Everything looked right and it certainly felt and worked right. I also realized why Devin wasn't very squeamish when I mentioned my period of even willing to touch me down there even with my tampon string hanging out; he probably used to menstruate himself.

The additional funds did allow me to look at maybe getting a better place to live. 2 months along now but still not showing much although I was experiencing plenty of morning sickness. I was so excited when I was finally able to see and feel my belly grow and my new body had continued to change shape. Josie kept calling but I never picked up. Devin sent a couple texts but I ignored those as well. I spent the week scouring the rentals available and also looked for a used car. I wanted to be all set before my baby arrived.

Finding a car was pretty easy. There was a posting for a “gently-used Prius" on a coffee shop bulletin board and I took a bus over to see it. Nothing fancy but the owner seemed nice and honest. He said he just got a new car and didn't need this one anymore. He accompanied me for a test ride and it seemed to run good, had pretty new tires and Prius is known for it's excellent fuel economy. After I signed the ownership papers he asked if maybe I'd like to join him for lunch.

He was kinda cute and maybe 5-6 years older than me. His name was Pete. A few inches taller than me he had a nice face under his brown hair all crammed under his baseball cap, 3-day old whiskers and a nice smile. His hands were working man's hands, a little beat up but you could just tell he was strong.

I drove to his favorite burger joint so I could familiarize myself to the car. I wasn't a big fan of burgers so I just had a salad and some fries. He said he lived in this town all his life, his dad was a professor but Pete himself never went to college. Instead he was kind of a handyman for the townsfolk. He said he can pretty much fix anything and believed that it was better to fix things first before tossing it out and buying
something new. I told him that was a good way to look at things. He asked what I did and I told him I was enrolled but decided to quit school and was planning in moving to a bigger town or city. Beyond that I really did not have any plans. He made a face like he didn't like what I told him. I decided I should tell him I was pregnant but the father wasn't involved.

He sighed and said, "That's too bad. There are way too many deadbeat dads around. If they're going to make them they needed to take care of them too."

It was nice to hear that. "Well this dad wasn't exactly a deadbeat, he didn't want me to get pregnant in the first place."

"Well that's a little different but it still isn't right."

I changed the subject. I didn't want to talk about Devin anymore. We just made small talk but he was nice to be around. He knew all sorts of facts about the town and seemed to know just about everybody. I thought to myself that's exactly why I needed to move away. He drove us to his place, got out and came around to hold the door open for me and then handed me the keys.

"Now if there is any problem with the car, ANY problem, call me, promise?"

We exchanged numbers and I hugged him quickly and said, "Thank you so much, Pete! You are so kind and thoughtful." I surprised him a bit when I gave him a peck on the cheek. I guess I do that a lot, it dawned on me.

"It was real nice meeting you, Carli and I'm glad ol' Paint is going to a good home." He names his cars; that's was so cute, I thought.

Since I now had a car I decided to check out some of the listings for apartments in the city which was 20 miles away from where I was. I figured it should be far enough away for me to not know anyone. I knew the rents would be higher but there would be more amenities like more grocery stores, maternity shops, just more and better selections of most things. The first place I looked at had amenities like a pool and being a swimmer I thought that would be nice to take a swim every day. I had been swimming a few times since my bad experience and, thankfully, hadn’t had any adverse reactions from the chemicals in the water, at least not the pool at campus. It also had covered parking and a 2 bedroom unit that cost just $100 more than I was paying before. I decided right then I would rent it. I drove around the city a bit to get my bearings and then headed back to my old place. I went in and realized how dreary it was and now I couldn't wait to leave this place and start over.

I struggled to get a lot of my stuff in the car. I had it pretty filled up and was ready to take a load but, wouldn't you know it, the car wouldn't start. "What now?" I asked myself. "This is all I need!" I called up Pete right away and he sounded glad to hear my voice but surprised. I told him the car wouldn't start but he said he was close by and he was at my apartment in just a few minutes.

He came over and said, "I'm real sorry about this, let me take a look.” He tried the ignition and it started right up but then he got out of the car holding up one of my shoes. "I think this was blocking the accelerator pedal so the ignition wouldn't engage. Try it again." Of course it started right up.

I looked at him sheepishly. What a silly a girl I must have seemed like. "Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry to drag you over here. Can I make it up to you somehow?"

He just laughed and said, "I'll take another one of those kisses on my cheek, if you don't mind." I went right over to him, kissed him on both cheeks and hugged him as well. "Oh, a bonus!" he said.

He then said, "You know, a pregnant lady shouldn't be lifting all this stuff by herself. Look, I have my truck right here and I'll load up whatever else you have and drive it to your new place. I'd be glad to do it for you."

"Oh, I can't ask you to do that. It's my bed, kitchen stuff and books, all the heavy stuff. I really don't want to impose."

"No problem. It's not an imposition if I volunteered now, is it? Besides, I'm not asking, I'm telling. Now let’s go get started."

"No, I guess not. Thank you so much!" I smiled. It took Pete about an hour to get all my stuff moved, it would have taken me half the day. Whatever muscles I used to have seemed to have turned soft probably because of the estrogen and Dr.Z's magic.

At my new apartment he backed into my parking space and asked what floor.

"Second," I answered.

"Lucky us, there is an elevator!" He took some boxes from my car, opened the elevator door and told me to pull the 'Hold' button. He loaded the rest of the stuff from his truck and said, "C'mon, let's enjoy ride," he laughed as went went up one floor. "You go open your door and I'll bring your things in."

"Surely there must be something I can do," I pleaded.

"Just point me to the right room."

He was done in less than an hour and that included putting my bed together since he seemed to always have his toolbox with him.

"I don't know what to say. How about I buy us dinner sometime, could I at least do that much?"

I think he was going to try and refuse but I just smiled and said, “I would feel bad if you said no," as I pouted my lips. That did it. “Can you pick the place, though? I don't know anything about the area."

"Uh, there's a place that makes good salads and french fries!"

"Funny! I was thinking a little more upscale this time."

He perked right up and said I know this place by the river. It's pretty nice, steaks and such."

"It sounds perfect. Next week, Saturday?"

He agreed, smiling. "It would be my pleasure, Ok? Right now I better get on home, I have a lot of mouths to feed."

Taken aback, it hadn't dawned on me to ask about his home life and was a little disappointed that he had a wife and kids.

"So how many mouths are in your family?" I asked.

"Well, including mine I have 6 to feed. 4 cats and a dog and they don’t like it when I'm late with their grub."

"I'm sure not!" I was so relieved and laughed while thinking how nice it was that he thought of his pets as family. "Well I better let you go, I don't want that pack mad at me!" This time in he extended his cheek toward me and I smiled and kissed him again, lingering a bit longer. I didn't wipe it off.

The next few days I puttered around my new place, trying to get things put away. It was a real pleasure to have a swim everyday again and I didn't know I had missed it so much. It felt different at first, my body fat getting redistributed threw me off, at first, but once I got the hang of it I felt like my old self. What really felt different was the water that got trapped into my growing cleavage. I made a note to get a few different styles. I loved seeing myself in a bikini but a one-piece would be better for doing laps.

I found myself getting excited about my Saturday night date with Pete. I checked the internet and searched for the place he had been talking about. It was easy. Not really dressy but a nice, hair done and makeup on kind of place. It seems I'm getting the hang of this girly world with all of the once-confusing customs. If I thought about this being a date then it was, really, my first real date with a man. With Devin it was all kinda casual.

I wore a nice, knee length dress in a floral pattern, mid-high heels, a scarf and put my hair up with clips and pins like Josie showed me. I wore a bit more makeup than usual but I think I still looked fresh and casual.

He buzzed me. When he walked in the door I couldn't believe it. Did he ever clean up good! Apparently he thought I did too.

"Carli, you look fantastic! I mean you looked pretty before but wow!"

"Look who's talking. Mr. Fixit goes to Hollywood!"

"Well thank you, Carli, that nice of you to say. I don't go out much."

"Me neither."

I took his arm and he led me, not to his truck, but a real nice-looking luxury car. I'd never ridden in anything like it. I sat down and the leather seats were so plush. I traced my hand over the dash and it was smooth and soft.

"The Lexus? It was a repo. I couldn't buy anything like this new nor would I want to."

"Well, I love my new car. Ol' Paint and I are good buddies now that I learned to keep my shoes on when I drive." He thought that was pretty funny and I was beginning to find about there is more than just a handyman in there.

The restaurant was very nice, romantic, even, with faerie lights strung outside from the branches of the trees. He parked and then opened my door and held my hand while I got out his low-slung car. I struggled a bit to keep my skirt from riding up while at the same time keeping my knees together. We were led to a nice path with a riverside view of boats moored alongside and a boardwalk along the river. He ordered a bottle of wine although I reminded him that I am with child and I could
only have a sip. We talked a little about our lives. He lost his dad 8 years ago and his mom 5. He had a married younger sister who had a couple of kids who adored their Uncle Pete. He's never been married, not that he didn't want to, but he hasn't found the right girl yet. Then he asked about me.

To be honest with him I would have to tell him things I didn't want him to know. I told him my folks lived back home but haven't seen them in a few years which was the truth. I told him I had a couple siblings and that I was a pretty good swimmer. That was all true. Telling him I used to be a different gender was probably something one doesn't want to share on a first date, if that's what this was. I just filled him in on going to college, my swimming scholarship and, well, that was about it. He already knew I was pregnant.

The food came and it looked wonderful but I had felt kind bloated all day and didn't eat much. I tried my best, though. He plowed through his soup, salad and entree eagerly. I smiled, knowing how much energy he must burn being so active. We finished our meal with coffee and a small dish of gelato which is something else I had never tried. It was fabulous! After our meal we walked along the promenade. It was a cool evening and he gallantly placed his sport coat over me for warmth like a
true gentleman.

I was beginning to like Pete...a lot!