As the classical music reaches its crescendo, I lower myself from pointe and dip into a perfect ballerina’s curtsey, spreading my voluminous tutu beneath me as the crowd roars with rapturous applause.

“Three cheers for the birthday girl!” Stuart yells from the audience, making me blush as I stand back up.

“Hip hip!” Stuart yells.

“Hooray!” The crowd enthusiastically responds.

“Everybody, please,” I say, cringing with embarrassment.

“Hip hip!” Stuart yells again.

“Hooray!” The crowd shouts, even louder than before.

“Hip hip!” Stuart yells.

“HOORAY!” The five girls stood behind me- all dressed in identical tutus that are just slightly less fancy than my own- scream in my ear, making me nearly freak out with excitement!

“Aww, you guys!” I squeak. “AND girls!”

“I can’t believe my little girl’s really twenty-three years old,” Dad says, his voice gushing with pride. “I love you, Jamie, and I am so very, very proud of you.”

“I love you too, dad,” I say, wiping a tear away from my eye. “I love you all!” The Angels take this as a sign to rush in and smother me in a tight group hug- fortunately we’re wearing romantic tutus rather than stiff net ones, so there’s no risk of crushing our beautiful costumes! Naturally, mum insists on having a photo taken of me, her and dad, which Nikki is more than happy to take for us. Photos of all the Angels are taken, and Nikki's camera is in danger of running out of memory when Dan approaches the group with his daughter in his arms.

“Ahh,” Mary sighs, cuddling the little girl- who for the occasion is wearing a tiny tutu of her own over her romper!

“Like mother, like daughter,” Krystie coos over the infant. “She is going to be SO talented when she’s older, aren’t you, Kayleigh?”

“Her name is Kristina-Leigh!” Mary laughs.

“Exactly,” Krystie says smugly. “Thus K-Leigh for short.

"Fine, but is she calls herself Kayleigh, I'm suing!" Mary giggles. "And yes, yes she is going to be so talented, aren't you, gorgeous?" Mary sighs happily as she gives her daughter a quick kiss on her forehead. "Especially given that she is technically already a model!"

“She looks SO cute in her little tutu!” Hannah squeaks excitedly.

“God, you know there’s gonna be a screaming fit when I try to take it off of her!” Mary says, causing a mass giggling fit as the infant becomes the centre of attention- not that I mind, of course, given that she is my goddaughter! "In addition to 'model', you can add 'drama queen' to the list of things she'll be when she gets older..."

“Hey,” Krystie laughs. “I should get a picture of the two of you with you en pointe!”

“Is that really a good idea?” Mary asks. “Balancing en pointe whilst holding a baby?”

“You’ve been dancing en pointe for half your life,” Krystie sighs. “And Dan can stand by to support you in case you wobble, right Dan?”

“Um, apparently, yes,” Dan laughs at his sudden volunteering. After the photo is taken, I quietly sneak away from the cooing masses, heading toward where my sexy boyfriend is sat with his two sisters.

“You were so cool!” Rebecca squeaks, giving me a hug before Stuart has a chance.

“You were,” Emma giggles. “God I wish I’d tried harder at ballet, I could never dance as well as that!”

“Thanks,” I say with a wide smile on my immaculately made-up face. “But you really need to give all the credit to that talented lady of there!” I point back at Ellen, who’s sat in the audience, beaming with pride at how the Angels perfectly performed her elaborate choreography.

“I’ll be sure to thank her for making the most beautiful girl in the world even MORE beautiful,” Stuart says, giving me a long, tender kiss. “I wish we could just spend the rest of the night together…”

“Get a room,” Emma & Rebecca say simultaneously, giggling at the coincidence.

“I’m trying!” Stuart complains, making me giggle too.

“I won’t stay out late, I promise,” I say, giving Stuart another tender kiss.

“Yeah, yeah,” Stuart laughs tiredly. “I love you, Jamie.” I sigh happily and wrap my arms around Stuart’s waist, not even bothering to acknowledge the hundreds of photos that are being taken of us.

“I love you too,” I say.

“Hey!” Charlotte calls over at our small group. “Save some Jamie for the rest of us!” Stuart laughs as he gives me another kiss, before letting me skip back to the other Angels.

Just over an hour later, after the crowd- minus the Angels- have vacated Krystie’s dance studio, the six of us gather in a small corner of the vast hall to change from our ostentatious tutus and pointe shoes into our outfits for the night.

“First girls’ night out as a 23 year old!” Mary teases as we apply our typically excessive clubbing make-up in the studio’s huge mirror.

“What about you?” I tease back. “First girls’ night out as a yummy mummy!”

“Yeah, sorry about Kristina-Leigh today,” Mary says quietly.

“What have you got to be sorry about?” I laugh. “I LOVE Kristina-Leigh. Now come on, do my ring finger!” Mary giggles happily as she applies a coat of emerald green nail polish to the nails on my ring fingers in what has quickly become an Angel tradition. The six of us will each pick a colour and paint the nails of one of the other’s fingers (well, pair of fingers) so that we all have the colours of the others with us at all times. In addition to the sparkly green polish on my ring fingers, I have jet black polish on my pinkies from Viks, pale lilac polish on my middle fingers from Hannah, neon pink on my index fingers from Krystie and glittery scarlet polish on my thumbnails from my BFF! My colour is the same sapphire blue I wore on my nails to the Angels premiere at the end of last year- and whilst blue may be seen (incorrectly, I should add) as a masculine colour, this particular shade is utterly GORGEOUS and is my absolute favourite nail polish. Of course, when the makers of the nail polish found this out, I ended up with several years’ worth of it!

After fixing my make-up, I strip out of my tutu and pull on a very scanty lace bra and G-string set. In the five months since my operation, my scars have faded to the point where they’re almost- but not quite- invisible. Everything ‘down there’ feels and looks like it’s meant to be there, and it’s like I’ve had a vagina my whole life. I head over to Krystie- still clad in just my underwear- who unties my bun and curls my naturally-straight hair with her hot curling iron, before helping me apply a liberal layer of fake tan (whilst standing on a large towel, of course, to preserve Krystie’s floor). I then pull on my dress, a teeny tiny black dress that shows off a LOT of cleavage and a LOT of leg. I start to head to the exit, signifying my readiness to leave, when the other girls suddenly rush around me, forcing a sparkly silver tiara on my head and a shiny pink sash that reads ‘Birthday Girl’ on my body. Knowing better than to argue, I simply giggle and give my best friends a hug each. It’s not long before all six of us are made0up, fake tanned and dressed ready for a night to remember.

“Are we ready, girls?” Charlotte asks.

“Let’s do this,” Hannah yells excitedly.

“Goooo…” We all say, placing our hands on top of each other’s. “…Angels!” Once we’re out in the reception area of the studio, we pull our skyscraper heels onto our feet- mine are a particularly excessive pair of 6” platform stilettos- and head into the waiting Angelmobile.

“Where to, girls?” Joshua asks from the driver’s seat.

“Let’s let the birthday girl decide!” Krystie yells.

“This is OUR city now!” I say confidently. “The first club you see- THAT’s going to be ours!” The other Angels all cheer as Joshua drives us into the busy Friday night. Sure enough, we arrive at a bustling club mere minutes later, where we’re ushered past the waiting queue into the VIP area- and, of course, treated to a bottle of champagne on the house.

“To Jamie-Lee Burke!” Charlotte toasts once we’re all sat with full glasses of the sparkling expensive drink.

“Jamie!” The other Angels yell excitedly, clinking their glasses together.

“This is so cool!” I squeak. “This is the best birthday EVER!”

“You’re the best friend ever!” Charlotte yells, giving me a long, tight hug.

“I love you all so much,” I sigh. “This is the first time we’ve been all out together in ages!”

“Yeah, sorry, sorry,” Mary says, making the entire table roar with disagreement.

“Don’t you dare be sorry!” Krystie snorts. “Kayleigh is the most beautiful thing ever! Kinda wish I had one…”

“Me too,” Viks sighs dreamily.

“I’ll remember you said that when I have to wake up at 4:30am to feed her!” Mary jokes. “Which means, of course, that this will be my first AND last glass…”

“Got to keep the contents of your tits nice and pure, eh?” Krystie jokes.

“Mark my words, you’ll be knee-deep in nappies and puke before you know it,” Mary says in an almost threatening voice.

“Chance’d be a fine thing,” Krystie sighs. “Need to find myself a nice man first…”

“There are no NICE men!” Hannah yells.

“Except Stuart!” I retort.

“And Dan, househusband of the year 2014!” Mary yells.

“And Jonathan!” Viks shouts. There’s a brief pause as the table, as one, turns to stare at Charlotte.

“Oh, um, and Keith!” Charlotte shouts. “Sorry, was miles away, I’m going to be away all weekend doing some filming… Kinda means I’m gonna have to duck out early tonight, sorry!”

“Don’t worry, you won’t be any earlier than me,” Mary laughs. “I’ll be lucky if I make it to eleven…”

“…And if I stay out any later than that I get roasted when I return home,” Viks sighs. “I was lucky I was able to get away tonight…”

“For the love of GOD, move out!” Hannah yells frustratedly. “You can more than afford it! In fact- and correct me if I’m wrong- don’t you make more money from your Angels contract than both of your parents put together?”

“Not quite,” Viks replies. “But not far off!”

“They’ve got two other kids to boss around when you’re gone,” I say. “Time to spread your wings!”

“Says the 23 year old woman who also still lives with her parents!” Viks retorts.

“Yeah, well I have another home to move into any time I want,” I say, giving my BFF a playful cuddle.

“’Anytime she wants’,” Charlotte says jokingly.

“Anyway,” I say commandingly, “did I not hear Miss Fullerton and Miss Dexter complaining about not being able to find any nice men, when there’s a whole club full of nice- well, POTENTIALLY nice- men just a few feet away?” Hannah and Krystie both giggle excitedly as they head onto the dancefloor, closely followed by the rest of us. Even though we’d spent most of the afternoon practising for our routine and our feet are aching from hours in pointe shoes- not to mention our current footwear- we all dance like our lives depend on it, and by the time Mary, Charlotte and Viks depart just after 11pm, I am utterly exhausted, not just from the clubbing, but from the whole day. Sensing my tiredness, Hannah and Krystie summon Joshua and the Angelmobile back to the club, and after being bundled into the back of it, I’m driven home, where I sigh at the sight of my vast pile of gifts that still clutter my sofa.

However, it’s not a present that I want to ‘unwrap’ right now, but rather a very sexy young man who came downstairs to greet me, whom I greet in return with a long, deep kiss…

I wake up the following morning just after 8am, my body still wrapped around Stuart’s and my skin still tingling from the orgasms he ‘gifted’ me last night.

“Hey,” I whisper, softly kissing the slumbering man on the lips.

“Mmm,” Stuart moans dreamily, making me giggle. “Morning, beautiful. Can we just skip the rest of today?”

“I wish,” I sigh. “Wedding’s only 3 weeks away, you know we’re not going to get any more free time soon, not with mad week on the horizon…” Stuart laughs and gives me another soft kiss.

“Why do half of the Angels have their birthdays within 3 weeks of each other?” Stuart asks self-pityingly.

“Blame Hannah, she’s the youngest out of me, her and Mary!” I giggle.

“AND it’s your six month, um, ‘anniversary’ too,” Stuart says.

“It is indeed!” I say happily, reaching into my dresser drawer and pulling out a thick orange tube. “Speaking of which...”

“Yes, yes,” Stuart mock-sighs, getting out of bed and pulling on a clean pair of boxer shorts. “Can’t wait until I can be the one taking Orange’s place…”

“I can’t wait either,” I say with a smile as my boyfriend leaves me to dilate in peace.

After dilating, showering, pulling on a clean bra and thong and applying my make-up, I dress for the day in shiny black tights and a clingy, long-sleeved patterned playsuit, finishing with my designer sunglasses and a cute pair of flats- a perfect casual yet chic look for shopping for dresses to wear to a wedding. The wedding isn’t my own, obviously- nor is it one of the Angels’, but rather Stuart’s older sister Emma. Even though we’re prospective future sisters-in-law (and she came to my birthday yesterday), we’re not actually that close, so I’ve found myself on the ‘invited guests’ list rather than the bridesmaid list (though Becca is of course maid of honour). However, this still means I need to find a beautiful dress to wear to the ceremony and the reception!

…And it means that Stuart, the ever-stereotypical BOY, is going to spend the day complaining about being bored when he should really be gushing over how beautiful I look in the numerous designer frocks I’ll be trying on throughout the day.

“Ready!” I say, prompting Stuart to smile and give me a long, soft kiss.

“Why don’t you just wear that to the wedding?” Stuart asks, prompting me to give him a soft, playful punch in the ribs. “Hey, it was just a suggestion. You’ve also got at least seven new dresses in that massive pile of gifts downstairs.”

“None of them are right for the occasion,” I say as I wave goodbye to my parents and head into Stuart’s car.

“I’ve seen them,” Stuart says. “Whilst it’s something I’ve tried NOT to be an expert at, there are at least two dresses similar to ones I’VE worn to a wedding before.”

“Exactly,” I say. “You’d have been what, 13 or 14 at the time? I need something more appropriate to my age.”

“…But you’ll still wear those dresses anyway?” Stuart asks. “And the vast quantities of skirts, tops and all-in-ones in that pile?”

“Eh, maybe,” I shrug, making Stuart laugh tiredly.

“Oh, the life of a model’s boyfriend…” Stuart muses as we drive into the centre of London.

Needless to say, we spend all of the morning and most of the afternoon trying on dresses. Well, I try on dresses anyway- Stuart mostly sits around fiddling with his smartphone. I try on at least 25 frocks in 6 different shops, but none satisfy my needs.

“Need I remind you,” Stuart says, holding my hand as we walk around the posh boutique, “you’re the one who said ‘we’re not going to get any more free time soon’? You’re going to have to pick SOMETHING today…”

“Yes, yes, I know,” I sigh.

“Why don’t you see if Nikki’s girlfriend can make you a dress?” Stuart asks. “You’re always going on about how good her designs are…”

“She doesn’t really do commissions,” I sigh. “Besides, the situation there’s kinda complicated right now. Let’s have a look over here, some of these dresses look ‘October wedding’y…” As I turned the corner, however, I encountered a sight I was not expecting to see in a million years.

“P-Paul?” I blurt. Almost in slow motion, Paul Gould turns to face me, a surprised smile on his face.

“Jamie?” Paul asks. “What are you doing here?”

“It’s a fashion boutique,” I giggle. “Use your imagination! More relevantly, what are YOU doing here?”

“Who are you talking to?” Stuart asks. It should go without saying this his eyes go as wide as dinner plates when he sees who I’m talking to.

“YOU?” Stuart asks angrily. “What are YOU doing here? Did you plan this?”

“Stop being so paranoid!” I snap at my boyfriend. “Though that’s two people now who’ve asked you what you’re doing here…”

“Same thing he is,” Paul says smugly, smiling smugly as a tall- VERY tall- woman skips over to him wearing a knee-length red dress similar to one I’d tried on earlier. Even discounting her height- noticeably taller than the 6’ 1” Paul in heels- there’s something a little ‘off’ about the girl, and it doesn’t take long to deduce from her body’s and her face’s bone structure that she, like me, was not born female.

“Hey babe,” the tall girl says in a convincing feminine voice. “Saw this one and it’s soooo pretty! What do you think?”

“Gorgeous, babe,” Paul says, giving the tall girl a quick kiss. “Simone, I’d like you to meet a couple of friends of mine, this is-“

“Oh my god!” Simone squeaks upon seeing my face. “Are- are you Jamie-Lee Burke?” When I nod, the tall girl bounces up and down excitedly, before offering me a limp, feminine handshake.

“Oh my god!” Simone repeats. “I am such a HUGE fan of yours, you and the Angels! I couldn’t believe it when Paulie said he used to go out with you! Can I get a selfie with you?”

“Um, sure!” I say, taken aback by Simone’s excessive enthusiasm. After taking the selfie, I ‘present’ my still-unhappy boyfriend.

“This is Stuart, my boyfriend,” I say, causing Simone’s enthusiasm to instantly drain from her face.

“Oh,” Simone says, clearly uncomfortable- possibly even hostile- about Stuart’s presence. “Anyway, happy birthday for yesterday! I hope the other girls spoiled you rotten?”

“Of course,” I say smugly. “AND I’ve got a phone full of pictures that have Instagram written all over them!” Simone squeaks excitedly, bouncing up and down again.

“Girls, eh?” Paul says, earning a snort of laughter from Stuart. “Though, I guess you’d know better than anyone else…”

“Oooookay,” I say, placing a calming hand on Stuart’s chest and backing him away from Paul. “I’ve made up my mind- I want the blue dress with the light patterns.”

“Right,” Stuart says, still glaring at Paul.

“Nice meeting you, Simone!” I say to the tall girl, who is still herself glaring at my boyfriend.

“You too, Jamie!” Simone says sweetly as she and Paul walk off.

“That can’t be a coincidence, surely?” Stuart asks as I retrieve my chosen dress and head to the checkout.

“Oh, stop being paranoid,” I chastise.

“I know, I’m sorry,” Stuart sighs. “It’s just- that guy is a real button pusher, you know?” Stuart remains tense even as we leave the store, especially as we catch a glimpse of Paul and Simone walking down the street away from us.

“For what it’s worth,” I sigh as I collapse down in the passenger seat of Stuart’s car, “I didn’t check in anywhere on Facebook, I didn’t post what I was doing on twitter, there’s no way Paul could’ve known where we were.”

“Random coincidence that out of ten million people in this city, we run into that particular one?” Stuart asks.

“STOP. BEING. PARANOID.” I hiss, before grimacing. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to spit, but- it- he’s just kinda a button pusher for me too, heh.”

“I think I know who I’d prefer to have pushing my body parts,” Stuart says, making me giggle happily.

“Tell you what,” I say, “I’ll call the girls and tell them to have girls’ night someplace else, without me. Let’s just have a night together, you and me.”

“I’d like that,” Stuart says softly. “…But I know how much you love Saturday nights in with the girls. Like Charlotte said yesterday, I’ve got to save some Jamie for the rest of them!”

“I’m your girlfriend,” I whine. “You can have me all to yourself if you want…”

“Oh, I intend to,” Stuart says with a twinkle in his beautiful eyes. “But… Your girls need you, Captain Burke!”

“Yes, sir!” I mock-salute, making us both giggle happily as Stuart drives me back home. Once we arrive home, even though it’s the middle of the afternoon AND my parents are both downstairs, I can’t help but launch myself at my sexy boyfriend the second I’ve hung my new dress up in my closet, pulling his clothes off and throwing him on the bed, where he quickly frees me from my playsuit and tights and stimulates me to orgasm after orgasm…

I reluctantly bid farewell to Stuart a couple of hours later, calling him back for kiss after kiss before he finally departs. As much as he may frustrate me at times… I do truly love him in a way I’ve never loved anyone before- certainly not Paul, and maybe not even Keith.

“I know that look,” mum teases as I collapse down on the sofa in my playsuit & tights. “That’s the look that says ‘I’d give anything just to have another minute with that boy’.”

“Ugh,” I sigh. “Am I THAT transparent?”

“You are when you’re in love!” Mum says. “When you’re with Stuart you just have this air of happiness about you.”

“I do really, really love him,” I say. “But- and I know this sounds silly- he can be a real pain in the arse at times.”

“He’s a MAN, darling,” mum says. “That’s not surprising!”

“Yes, yes, I know,” I say. “I just thought- because of how he was born-“

“That’s a bit like expecting you to understand what it’s like for a man,” mum says.

“But I DO,” I sigh. “I mean, I can understand why he feels the way he does at times, I just don’t understand why he has to be such an idiot about it.”

“That’s because you’re a WOMAN,” mum giggles.

“Yeah,” I giggle, smiling happily. My smile only widens a short while later when Mary arrives for girls’ night, pushing a stroller containing her beautiful daughter, who looks simply adorable in her soft pink onesie.

“Hey,” I say, giving Mary a hug and the giggling Kristina-Leigh a soft kiss on her forehead. “SO glad Dan let you bring this little one around for her first official girls’ night!”

“It was a pretty hard sell,” Mary sighs. “He didn’t need much persuasion to babysit last night, god, I think he’s bonding with her even more than I am!”

“Good,” I say. “Every girl should have an awesome dad in her life- not to mention, of course, the most awesomest mum ever!”

“I was amazed she recognised me when I got home last night,” Mary giggles as she takes the precious infant from her stroller and cradles her in her arms. “All the make-up and fake tan I had on…”

“Make-up and fake tan that she herself will be obsessed with in eighteen years’ time…” I giggle.

“DON’T,” Mary warns. “Just don’t. If Dan had his way he’d wrap Kristina-Leigh up in cotton wool for the rest of her life, and I’ve half a mind to let him!”

“You’re so lucky,” I sigh. “You’ve got a great husband, you’ve got this little thing…”

“I am,” Mary says with a content smile. “AND the best friends in the world!”

“Of course!” I giggle. Before too long, Krystie & Hannah have joined the ‘party’, closely followed by Becca, Adeola, Nikki and Sarah- all of whom immediately go gooey upon the sight of Kristina-Leigh.

“At least there’s a reason OTHER than me for there being no alcohol tonight,” Nikki sighs as she cradles the infant in her slender arms. “Suppose I’m going to have to get used to this, heh.”

“When’s your mum due again?” Hannah asks.

“Second week in January,” Nikki replies. “And yes, she’ll be a girl. Wouldn’t it be just awesome if she and Kristina-Leigh became friends?”

“I can guarantee that’ll happen,” Mary giggles. “If she’s anything like her sister, I’ll make sure she’s Kristina-Leigh’s BEST friend!”

“Speaking of ‘best friends’,” Krystie says to Hannah, “where’s Miss Brooks tonight? Hot date with a tall, dark, not-very-stranger?”

“Hot date with her little brothers,” Hannah sighs. “She’s been called in for babysitting duties again.”

“Oh what?” I ask. “Isn’t one of her brothers fifteen? God knows I was left alone in the house when I was that old…”

“Yeah, but you don’t have any brothers or sisters,” Hannah continues. “…And knowing Viks’s parents, I’d say it’s more likely that THEY’RE babysitting HER.”

“Why are they so protective?” Becca sighs. “I thought my dad was overprotective, but he lets me come out at night, AND I’m the youngest of three, not the oldest, AND I’m younger than Viks!”

“He’s always been weird about her,” Hannah sighs. “Probably why she never had any confidence growing up, he’d always panic that she’d run off with some loser and end up as a streetwalker addicted to heroin or something…”

“Kristina-Leigh, cover your ears,” I giggle.

“Same goes for you two!” Krystie laughs at Nikki and Sarah, who simply stick their tongues out in response.

“So yeah, he’d always try to shield her,” Hannah continues. “He didn’t let her wear any make-up- ANY make-up- until she was eighteen, whenever we went out to a club he’d insist that she’d get back early…”

“Sounds like he needs a serious attitude adjustment,” I muse.

“He DOES,” Hannah says, before a sly grin creeps across her face. “Fancy giving one to him?”

“What did you have in mind?” I enquire.

“You could always make him a portfolio of all the lingerie shoots Viks has done,” Nikki says, prompting a mass giggle.

“She said ‘attitude adjustment’, not ‘heart attack’,” Hannah giggles. “Though that’s not that bad an idea!”

The girls only stick around for a few hours as opposed to the usual late-night sessions our girls nights end up becoming. Mary departs first to put Kristina-Leigh to bed, followed by Krystie then the teenagers, leaving me alone with Hannah, who playfully snuggles up next to me on the sofa.

“So, are we ‘rescuing’ Viks tomorrow, then?” Hannah asks.

“If what you say is true, someone has to!” I giggle. “Though in a way I’m kinda jealous. I mean, when I was sixteen, my parents…”

“Aww,” Hannah says, giving me a quick cuddle. “But they love you NOW, and that’s all that matters!”

“You’re right,” I say. “Want to sleep over tonight?”

“Thought you’d never ask,” Hannah laughs. “Unlike some, I don’t have a warm, sexy MAN waiting in bed for me…”

“Yeah, sorry, but my bed is a penis-free zone tonight!” I reply smugly.

“’Flesh and blood’ penis, I take it?” Hannah says, making me roll my eyes as I remember the thick orange tube waiting for me upstairs.

“Thanks for reminding me,” I sigh. “Can you give me a sec?”

“Sure,” Hannah says, releasing her cuddle as I head upstairs and start dilating. With fifteen minutes to kill (I obviously can’t move with the dilator inserted), I grab my iPad and open up Facebook, quickly browsing to Paul Gould’s profile.

‘Hey,’ I type. ‘Was that ACTUALLY a coincidence, us running into each other today?’

‘Swear to god,’ Paul replies. ‘Simone’s got a big uni ball coming up, she wanted a new dress… There are only a limited amount of posh dress shops in London, I know how much you love shopping, Simone’s the same way, it was bound to happen sooner or later.’

‘Lol,’ I reply. ‘So, um, Simone…’

‘Yes?’ Paul replies, leading to a brief pause in the conversation.

‘Are you deliberately enjoying making me squirm or shall I just come out and ask it?’ I type.

‘Ask what?’ Paul replies with a smiley face.

‘Oh for fuck's sake,’ I type. ‘You know what I’m going to ask.’

‘No, I don’t,’ Paul types with a winking smiley.

‘Has her name always been ‘Simone’?’ I type, hoping that I’ve been delicate enough to avoid crossing a line.

‘Well played,’ Paul replies. ‘And no, it hasn’t, and to answer your suspicions, yes, she is. She’s 20, been transitioning on hormones for the last six months.’

‘So she’s pre-op?’ I ask. ‘And she doesn’t mind going out without someone who cowers at the sight of a penis?’

‘Hilarious!’ Paul replies. “And yes, she’s pre-op, and yes, we have a sex life, and no, I’m not going into any further details as I’m a gentleman.’

‘That’s certainly a matter of opinion,’ I type whilst giggling happily. ‘Surprised you’re not embarrassed by what your friends will think about you being involved with a T-girl…’

‘Ugh, I deserved that,’ Paul replies.

‘Yes, yes you did,’ I type.

‘And you DIDN’T deserve it,’ Paul types, bring a tear to my eye. ‘Much like I didn’t deserve my black eye… Though Simone very nearly gave Stuart one on my behalf today!’

‘Lol,’ I type. ‘Got to go now, missing girls night!’

‘Heh, enjoy!’ Paul types. ‘Ttyl, Jamie.’ I put my iPad away and remove (and clean) my dilator before heading back downstairs, diving onto my sofa and attack-cuddling Hannah the exact same way she’d earlier ‘hugged’ me. It’s not long before we’re both in bed, getting an early night ahead of our ‘mission’ tomorrow.

The following morning, Hannah and I both wake early and take turns in the shower (I also take the opportunity to dilate whilst Hannah showers) before fixing our make-up and getting dressed. I opt for a clingy blue-grey long sleeved bodysuit, nude tights and a wavy knee-length skirt, whilst Hannah borrows one of my maxi dresses (that comes to just above her ankles when she wears it, of course). As we plan on recruiting the extra-tall Jonathan for our ‘mission’, we of course both pull on high heeled shoes. This confuses dad greatly when we say goodbye to him and he sees Hannah standing a full 2 inches taller than him!

“I am SO buying that bodysuit when I get home,” Hannah giggles, stroking my sleeve as we hop in my car. “It’d go great with hot pants.”

“I actually got it from a shoot a couple of months ago,” I say. “Ever since my SRS I’ve been getting endless amounts of underwear and dancewear shoots, it’s like everybody’s suddenly obsessed with my crotch…”

“Can you blame them?” Hannah giggles. “I’m sure it’s a very, very beautiful crotch…”

“Yes I CAN blame them,” I retort. “I’d like to think that I was more than just a vagina…”

“Well, you’ve met my ex-boyfriend,” Hannah sighs. “Got bad news for you: there are a LOT of men in the world who think that way.”

“Fortunately, I’M not going out with one of them,” I say with a smug smile. “And nor is Viks!” As if on cue, we pull up outside Jonathan’s house, where the tall dark-skinned man is already sat and waiting in his car (my car’s only got 2 seats so obviously we won’t all fit in it).

“Morning, girls!” Jonathan says as we pile onto his back seat. “I understand you’re planning on kidnapping my girlfriend, is that right?”

“More like ‘un-kidnapping’, um, ‘emancipating’ her,” I say. “Are her parents really as much of a nightmare as Han makes out?”

“Well they don’t like me, that’s for damn sure,” Jonathan sighs. “Dunno if it’s ‘cos I is black’, heh.”

“They’ve never been THAT BNP,” Hannah says. “I mean, they’re not MY biggest fans, I’m sure they thought I was ‘leading Viks astray’ when we were at school, then I got her signed to your uncle…”

“I’m sure if we go round there and just invite her on a day out, they can’t refuse, right?” I say. “I mean, her boyfriend and her best friend making a united front?”

“It might not help that we’ve been talking about moving in together,” Jonathan says quietly.

“Oh my god, that’s so cool!” Hannah squeaks.

“Yeah, well Viks’s parents aren’t gonna see it that way,” Jonathan sighs. “Their little girl shacking up with someone she’s known for less than a year…”

“Best then that we DON’T mention that when we pick her up,” I giggle as we drive into the outskirts of London.

When we arrive at Viks’s house, the three of us adopt an ‘excited’ exterior. The ploy is that we’re having a day out shopping, which we will actually briefly do, but our main concern is simply getting Viks out of her house. However, our carefully-laid plan hits a snag immediately after ringing her doorbell.

“Oh, hello girls, Jonathan,” Viks’s mother says upon seeing us on her doorstep. “I’m sorry, but we’re all heading out in a bit to see Vicky’s grandmother so she won’t be able to hang out with you today.”

“Oh, okay,” Hannah says, her plan in tatters.

“Can I come along?” Jonathan asks. “I don’t think I’ve ever met Viks’s grandmother.”

“I’m sorry Jonathan, but this is family only,” Mrs Brooks says politely.

“Can I at least say hi to Viks before she goes?” Jonathan asks, clearly desperate to see his girlfriend.

“She’s in the shower right now,” Mrs Brooks says, “but I’ll tell her you dropped by.” Defeated, the three of us slink off back to Jonathan’s car and drive away, confused by Mrs Brooks’s unusually hostile attitude.

“I didn’t hear any showers running,” Hannah mumbles.

“Do you suppose they actually will tell Viks I was there?” Jonathan asks.

“Eh, it’ll be hard for them to keep it from her,” Hannah says, hastily composing a text message. “Especially as I just texted her saying that we’re sorry we missed her and we hope she has fun at her grandma’s!”

“Ooh, you sneaky little minx,” I giggle. “Still, Viks or no Viks, still fancy that shopping trip?”

“Call Stuart Milton,” Jonathan says into his car phone. “There’s no way I’m being dragged around London on a shopping trip without some MALE company!”

“BOY!” Hannah and I laughingly yell.

After picking up Stuart, we start to head to the nearest posh boutique when I’m interrupted by the new text message alert on my phone.

‘Hey Jay!’ Reads the message from my BFF. ‘Got everything done quickly so coming back from Birmingham early. See you at mine this afternoon?’

‘On a shopping adventure with Hannah atm,’ I type. ‘What time you getting back?’

‘I’m on the train right now, be about half an hour,’ Charlotte replies near-immediately. ‘Don’t buy anything without me!!!’

‘As if we would,’ I type with a smiley.

“Jon, can we swing by Euston in a bit?” I ask.

“Ooh, is this Miss Hutchinson we’re picking up?” Hannah asks.

“Yep,” I reply happily. “So girls are going to outnumber boys today- exactly as it should be!”

A short while later, we pull up outside the vast railway station, and Hannah and I scooch over on the back seat to allow Charlotte to sit down. Immediately, however, I can tell that something’s up with her.

“You okay?” I ask the exhausted-looking girl.

“Just a long day’s filming, that’s all,” Charlotte sighs, her demeanour a far cry from her usual self (and how she seemed by text message). “I’m DEFINITELY up for some shopping, though!”

“Have the girls told you yet WHY they’re going shopping?” Stuart asks.

“Um, no?” Charlotte asks with a mixture of concern and confusion.

“Well, today, there actually is a reason other than retail therapy, which makes a nice change,” Stuart giggles, earning himself a playful whack from yours truly.

“They’re trying to kidnap my girlfriend,” Jonathan explains. “None of us have seen her in days- well, not since Jamie’s party, anyway- and it’s like her family’s holding her hostage.”

“Hostage?” Charlotte asks. “Seriously?”

“Well… Maybe a slight exaggeration,” Hannah concedes.

“You’re closer to her than anyone bar Jon or Han,” I say to my BFF. “Haven’t you noticed that she’s not been around as much as she used to be?”

“I guess a little,” Charlotte sighs. “You know I’ve been away a lot myself lately.”

“Yeah, when is Joshua going to get me one of these hosting gigs?” Hannah laughs.

“Oh come on,” I laugh. “Aren’t you making a boatload of money as it is?”

“Let’s put it this way,” Hannah giggles. “My credit card won’t know what’s hit it today!”

The five of us eventually return to Charlotte’s vast house just after 5pm, having spent most of the day (and a lot of money!) in several expensive clothing stores. Stuart, of course, complained that I’d bought myself two new dresses when we’d spent most of yesterday looking for just one, though he of course didn’t know- and didn’t care- that the dresses I bought today were completely inappropriate for October weddings. After Hannah, Charlotte and I ‘model’ our new clothes for Jonathan, Stuart and Keith, we all decide to get an early night- we have our usual ballet mornings on Monday, and Hannah, Charlotte and myself plan on being up early to ensure that Viks will be there too.

As I snuggle my naked body up against Stuart’s, I can’t shake the ‘plight’ of my dark-haired friend from my mind.

“I’m really worried about Viks,” I sigh. “She didn’t even reply to Hannah’s text…”

“She IS an adult, you know,” Stuart says, giving me a tender cuddle. “If she wants to go out and do her own things, surely her parents can’t permanently stop her?”

“Yeah, well Becca’s an adult too,” I say, sticking my tongue out at my boyfriend. “Hasn’t stopped you trying to wrap her in cotton wool.”

“If you try to ‘emancipate’ her, we’re breaking up,” Stuart jokes, sticking his tongue out at me. “Though I guess you’re right, both about her AND about Viks.”

“I just need to, you know, show that Viks’s life isn’t a danger to her,” I say. “Or whatever they’re worried about. I want us to be a sixsome again.”

“Eightsome,” Stuart says. “My sister and her best friend, remember?”

“Tensome, then, if we include Nikki and Sarah,” I giggle. “The point is… Without ALL of us, it just feels like there’s something missing.”

“Get some sleep,” Stuart whispers, giving me a soft kiss. I sigh happily and do as I’m told, falling asleep within seconds as Stuart holds me closer and closer to his body…

I wake up the following morning just after 7:30am, still tired despite my early night, and after showering and dilating, I pull on my regulation pink tights, followed by a tight black spaghetti-strapped leotard, a loose purple dress and a cute pair of black flats. After grabbing my dance bag, I knock on Charlotte’s door.

“Just a sec,” Keith yells from the other side of the door. “Charlie’s still in the bathroom.”

“Okay,” I yell back, to be greeted by the very groggy-looking face of my BFF mere seconds later.

“Ugh,” Charlotte moans. “Early mornings after travelling are KILLER. Come on, let’s get Hannah and let’s do this.” After waking the tall girl- who was sprawled out on the sofa- the three of us head back to Viks’s house in the Angelmobile (after a quick pit stop at Hannah’s house to allow her to change into her dance gear). As yesterday, we knock on Viks’s front door, and as yesterday, it’s Viks’s mum who answers.

“Oh, hello girls,” Mrs Brooks explains. “I’m sorry, but Vicky’s feeling under the weather and can’t come to ballet this morning.”

“Oh, that’s okay,” Hannah says with fake innocence. “We’ve got plenty of time before the lesson, can we pop up and see her?”

“That’s not a good idea,” Mrs Brooks says.

“Is that Vicky’s friends?” A loud, male voice- undoubtedly Viks’s father- shouts from inside the house.

“Hi Mr Brooks,” Hannah shouts. “It’s Hannah, I’m here with Jamie and Charlotte, can we come in and see Viks, please?” the three of us all flinch slightly as the tall man comes to the door with a very stern expression on his face.

“Vicky’s very busy looking at university prospectuses,” Mr Brooks says with what almost sounds like anger in his voice.

“I thought she was unwell?” I ask innocently, earning the wrath of both of Viks’s parents.

“And I thought she wasn’t going to do any post-grad study,” Hannah interjects.

“Victoria,” Mr Brooks explains, “is worth more, MUCH more than just being a pretty face to put make-up on. She went to university for a career, and she’ll be doing post-grad study as she CARES about what she does with her life.”

“Everybody on this doorstep has made a very large amount of money from being, as you put it, ‘just a pretty face to put make-up on’,” Charlotte interjects, some anger in her own voice. “It’s not like we’re asking Viks to abandon her studies for the potential of a career- this is a career she already has. It sounds to me like you’re asking her to give up a successful career for the potential of something else.”

“Prancing around in tutus in front of a camera isn’t a ‘career’,” Mr Brooks argues.

“Tell that to my bank balance,” Hannah says, getting her phone out of her dance bag. “Better yet, tell it to Viks’s. Correct me if I’m wrong, but doesn’t she earn more money than you?”

“It. Can’t. Last,” Mr Brooks argues. “And now she’s filling her brothers’ heads with nonsense about ‘being a superstar’ as well. I can’t let my sons throw their lives away on a whim like Victoria has.”

“Surely it’s Viks’s decision what she wants to do with her life?” I say, momentarily silencing the middle-aged man.

“Hey Viks!” Hannah suddenly says into her phone. “We’re here to pick you up for ballet, where are you?” Mere seconds later, our dark-haired friend appears on the stairs behind her father dressed in her black leotard and pink tights, obviously ready for a dance lesson.

“Victoria, go back upstairs,” Mr Brooks orders in a stern, albeit not harsh tone.

“No,” Viks defiantly says. “It’s Monday morning, I have my dance class on Monday morning, and I intend to go to it.”

“I told you, go back upstairs,” Mr Brooks says in a considerably angrier voice. “You’re meant to be looking at universities!”

“And I will,” Viks says. “AFTER ballet.”

“Whilst you’re living under my roof, you’ll do as I say,” Mr Brooks says, earning a withering glare from his daughter.

“Do you REALLY want to play that card?” Viks sneers. Sensing that he’s been defeated, Mr Brooks steps aside and allows Viks to join us in the pink cab.

“Are you okay?” Hannah asks her BFF as I drive us to the studio.

“Yes,” Viks sighs. “No. God…” On cue, Charlotte and Hannah give Viks a long group hug as Viks lets out her worries.

“Dad’s been such a pain in the arse lately,” Viks explains. “He NEVER approved of me signing for Joshua, even though he came to the premiere in December he’s not watched a single episode of our show since. Even thinks I’m somehow ‘corrupting’ Andy and Phil.”

“Yeah, he said,” I interject.

“Isn’t one of your brother’s an aspiring actor?” Charlotte asks.

“Phil?” Viks asks. “Yeah. You know how much he loves you guys.”

“I remember when he was five years old,” Hannah laughs. “He’s dress up in one of your dresses and do a song and dance routine and your dad would go BALLISTIC!” Viks giggles at the memory- and I can tell it’s the first time she’s truly laughed in a while. “He’s actually in a play this evening, just a local thing done through his drama club at school. Dad thinks he’s at a football game, heh.”

“We should go!” Hannah says.

“Definitely!” I yell in agreement.

“Nah, it’d embarrass him too much,” Viks says, before I see a sly grin creep over her face in the rear-view mirror. “I’ll call up the theatre. We’re TOTALLY going!”

“Will ‘daddy’ approve, though?” Hannah asks.

“Ugh,” Viks spits. “That’s the question…”

“You’re a grown woman,” Charlotte says. “You can’t let him dictate to you anymore.”

“I know, I know,” Viks sighs. “It’s just- I love my father, if I fell out with him or stopped talking to him I’d be DEVASTATED…” In the rear-view mirror, I can see Charlotte give Viks an extra-tight hug- and immediately I’m reminded that out of all of us, Charlotte has no living parents, and before he died, her own relationship with her father was effectively destroyed.

“You have to do what YOU feel is right,” I say. “And your father needs to accept that his little girl is now an adult who can make her own choices.”

“Have you TRIED talking to him?” Viks sighs.

“For what felt like an hour before you came downstairs!” Hannah giggles.

After an hour and a half of dancing, the four of us- myself, Charlotte, Hannah and Viks- return to the Brooks’ home, where Viks’s father is waiting with a VERY angry look on his face.

“It’s a good job Andrew and Philip had already left for school so they didn’t have to see you disobey me like that,” the middle-aged man growls at his daughter as we let ourselves into his home. “You and I need to have a long talk. IN PRIVATE.”

“No,” Viks says nervously, gripping Hannah’s hand for support. “Anything you have to say to me you can say in front of my friends.”

“Your ‘friends’ are the whole reason we need to talk,” Mr Brooks grumbles. “I’ve put up with this ‘Angels’ nonsense long enough. When you signed for that damned agency you assured me it’d be a part-time, short-term thing, that it’d just be to make some extra pocket money and that it wouldn’t interfere with your studies.”

“And it didn’t,” Viks retorts. “I graduated, didn’t I? Now I’ve got my degree, I need a career. And- oh wait, I HAVE a career!”

“Prancing around in clothes is not a proper career!” Mr Brooks sneers, earning foul stares from all four models on his sofa.

“It may not be long-term,” Viks argues, “but for now it’s making me more money than I ever would from one of your ‘proper careers’!”

“…And when it all comes crashing down?” Viks’s dad asks with a snide grin.

“I’ll still have my degree,” Viks replies with an equally snide voice. “I’ll have numerous contacts in loads of different industries. I’ll have my friends. I’ll have Jon. I’LL BE FINE.”

“That so-called boyfriend of yours is just part of the problem,” Mr Brooks growls.

“I LOVE him,” Viks insists. “You wouldn’t be so upset if he was white!”

“I AM NOT A RAC-“ Mr Brooks snaps, before taking a deep breath. “I am not a racist. Him having dark skin has nothing to do with him not being good enough for you!”

“So what is it, then?” Viks asks. “He comes from a rich family, he has a well-paid job- one of those ‘proper careers’ you love so much- he’s mature, responsible, independent… All those things you seem determined to prevent me from being!”

“I have no problem with you being independent,” Mr Brooks sighs. “I have no problem with you making your own decisions, provided they’re the right decisions!”

“So it’s not enough that I do as I’m told,” Viks says coldly. “I have to THINK the way I’m told to think too?”

“In the long run… I only want what’s best for you,” Mr Brooks says in a much smaller voice than the one with which he started the conversation. “This-“ he continues, gesturing to myself, Charlotte and Hannah- “isn’t that.”

“It’s still my decision to make,” Viks says. “As is the decision of where I live.”

“Please, please don’t…” Mr Brooks whispers.

“You knew this would happen someday,” Viks says, tears forming in the corners of her eyes. “Jon and I will be moving in together in the coming few weeks.”

“Are you getting married?” Viks’s dad asks his daughter, who simply shakes her head in response.

“Not yet,” Viks whispers. “You can’t stop me from moving out.”

“You’ve changed over the last year,” Mr Brooks sighs. “And not for the better. You used to be such a polite, loving girl. Now you’re headstrong, stubborn and arrogant.”

“You’re wrong,” I interject, earning myself a stern stare from the older man. “Viks has changed, but it IS for the better. When I first met her she was timid and quiet, and she had such low self-esteem it actually hurt, and now I understand why. Your daughter is a beautiful, intelligent, successful and independent young woman. Maybe you should be encouraging THOSE characteristics instead of insisting that she blindly obeys you every second of every day.” I shiver a little as I finish my ‘speech’ and Mr Brooks fixes me with what can only be described as a death glare. Fortunately, the feeling of Viks’s trembling hand in mine calms me down before the inevitable retort.

“Are you a parent?” Mr Brooks asks, and I’m forced to shake my head. “Are any of you? I didn’t think so. You don’t know what it’s like watching your own flesh and blood fly head first into disaster.”

“Moving in with someone she loves and continuing an already successful career is hardly a ‘disaster’!” Hannah snaps.

“And a year from now?” Mr Brooks argues. “When her beloved Jon’s dumped her and her career’s in ruins, what will she have?”

“ONE!” Charlotte snaps angrily. “Jon is NOT going to dump her. He loves her just as much as she loves him. And two- her career is going from strength to strength. No, you can’t predict what will happen 12 months from now, except to say this- if the worst- or anything bad, or even slightly negative- happens, Viks will always have US.”

“You’re not going to win this one, dad,” Viks says in the same timid voice she introduced herself to me with all those months ago.

“Fine,” Mr Brooks sighs. “Go and make your mistakes. It’s your life you’re throwing away, after all. Just don’t expect sympathy when you fall down hard. And do NOT take your brothers down with you!” The four of us stand up to leave, but before we get to the door, Charlotte stops, whirling round on her heel to give Mr Brooks a piece of her mind.

“I may not be a parent yet,” Charlotte says, “but I do know ONE thing about being a parent- and that’s that you must love your children unconditionally. ALL of your children, ALL of the time.”

“And what if you can’t find a way to love one child without harming another?” Mr Brooks asks.

“That’s your problem,” Charlotte says coldly. “NOT Viks’s.” Silently, we leave the house and pile back into the Angelmobile, where Viks almost immediately breaks down in floods of tears. Charlotte, Hannah and I immediately wrap the distraught girl in a tight group hug, allowing her to cry herself out on our shoulders.

“Ice cream and onesies?” Charlotte says once Viks’s tears have stopped, making the dark-haired girl giggle and nod.

“I- I um, don’t have any other clothes…” Viks complains in a very small voice.

“We’ll swing by Jon’s,” Hannah says, climbing into the driver’s seat and driving us away. “You don’t need much more than a leotard underneath a onesie anyway!” Much to the entire car’s relief, Viks giggles again as we head back into central London.

After allowing Viks to change, the four of us return to Charlotte’s house, where, after changing from our ballet togs into our onesies (and I take the opportunity to dilate), we’re soon joined by Nikki and Sarah- both wearing tiger onesies- and Mary in her pink onesie, who’s brought her daughter with her in an identical outfit. Needless to say, the hearts of everyone in the house melt when they see Kristina-Leigh in her pink romper with a tiny pink tutu wrapped around her waist.

“See, Kayleigh?” Hannah teases, earning a swift shout of ‘Kristina-Leigh’ from Mary. “We’re grown-ups and we’re all wearing rompers too!”

“Baaaahhhh,” Kristina-Leigh babbles in response, making everyone’s hearts melt even further. Even though the onesie party is for Viks’s benefit, Kristina-Leigh quickly becomes the centre of attention as she’s passed around the assembled women, especially as she starts playing with Nikki’s plaited hair!

“My dad’s been such an- well- a nasty man lately,” Viks says.

“She won’t be able to understand English for several months,” Mary giggles at Viks’s self-censorship. “But thanks anyway.”

“I always knew he was a bit intense with his parenting, but he really seems to have, you know, gone off the deep end,” Hannah muses.

“It’s got infinitely worse since I graduated,” Viks sighs. “It was his idea that I went to uni, to get a degree, to get a career, but actually achieving that seems to have turned him into Dadzilla. Mum’s no better, she just does whatever dad tells her…”

“In a way I’m kinda envious,” I confess. “Heh, you all know about my history with my dad..."

“And MY dad certainly had an interesting way of showing his protectiveness,” Charlotte interjects.

“Everyone’s dad is different, heh,” Viks laughs.

“The point is,” I continue, “I reconciled with my dad, and now our relationship’s closer than ever. Though I did kinda have to have major surgery to my genitals in order to achieve that relationship!”

“Yeah, well no one’s coming anywhere near MY genitals,” Viks quips, making the whole room laugh (and making Mary place her hands over her daughter’s ears!). “Father-daughter is a better relationship than father-son?”

“Like you said, everyone’s dad is different,” I say. “For Stu, he’s become a lot closer to his dad as a boy than when he was a girl. Kinda helps that he only has sisters, I guess.”

“Me being the only girl certainly DOESN’T help,” Viks moans, before staring happily at the sleeping Kristina-Leigh. “Maybe I should get myself one of those, see if he’s a better grandfather than a father, heh.”

“Sure, you’re 21,” Mary moans as she cuddles her daughter. “You’re too young to be thinking about kids. God, I’M too young to be thinking about kids and I’ve already got one!”

“Fair enough, MUM,” Viks teases, making the Irish woman poke her tongue out at her. “Jon does have that spare room, though…”

“Aww,” Hannah complains. “Then where will I sleep when I stay over?”

The entire room stayed in a onesie- and ice cream-fuelled state of happiness for the next few hours, before dispersing to their own respective homes. Dan arrives to collect his wife and daughter (and Krystie, who’d briefly dropped in after work), Jonathan drove Hannah and Viks home (the latter to his own flat), Sarah drove herself and Nikki home whilst I headed back with Stuart to his home (after changing into a cute skirt & top first, of course), leaving Charlotte & Keith alone in her vast home.

“Poor Viks,” Stuart says as we climb into his plush king-sized bed. “I’d like to think that if I ever became a dad, I’d actually respect my children’s choices.”

“Like your dad did for your ‘choice’?” I ask.

“Yeah,” Stuart says. “Well, kind-of. Admittedly it did take a few weeks for it to sink in with him. Maybe I should get him to have a chat with Viks’s dad.”

“I’ve also volunteered my dad for ‘the chat’ too,” I say. “Though in fairness, his discovery of my ‘choice’ came after 2 years of radio silence, 9 months of hormones and breast implants, heh.”

“Heh,” Stuart says, playfully running a hand over my body. “Speaking of breast implants…” I giggle as Stuart slowly eases his hands up my torso, before a new message notification on his phone interrupts us.

“Ignore it,” I insist, grabbing Stuart’s hand and forcing it to continue its upward climb.

“It might be important,” Stuart sighs, wriggling free of my grip and checking his phone. “Oh shit,” my boyfriend whispers with obvious shock.

“What? What is it?” I ask.

“See for yourself,” Stuart says, his face white as a sheet. My jaw drops and my complexion drains as I read the headline on Stuart’s phone.

‘CHARLOTTE THE HARLOT: Supermodel Hutchinson steps out on her long-term boyfriend for the second time in as many years.’ Underneath the headline is a photograph taken in Birmingham of Charlotte deeply kissing someone who is most definitely NOT Keith.

“Oh fuck,” I whisper. “Does- does Keith know about this?”

“Who d’you think texted me?” Stuart asks. “I- I need to ring him…”

“I should call Charlotte,” I say, grabbing my own phone. “Poor girl must be going ballistic…”

“Well- she shouldn’t have fucking well slept with that footballer then, should she?” Stuart spits.

“Oh- ugh!” I spit. “You don’t know that they did anything more than kiss!”

“Because Charlotte doesn’t have form, right?” Stuart asks, putting away his phone. “Keith’s line’s engaged, I’ll sent him a text. Typically I can’t get the day off work tomorrow…”

“Okay, first,” I say angrily. “Don’t just judge the girl like she’s some cheap whore. She’s your friend! Second, you don’t know the circumstances!”

“Jamie,” Stuart says. “I’m not blaming you for sticking up with your friend, but if it was Keith who cheated on Charlotte, you’d be first in line to tear his dick off!”

“There’s no answer from Charlotte,” I say, before shaking my head. “Let’s- let’s just get some sleep, I’m at work tomorrow too…”

“Okay,” Stuart says, giving me a hesitant kiss as we snuggle up together in bed. However, I can tell from his tossing and turning throughout the night- not to mention my own- that neither of us sleep much.

Immediately as I wake up, I grab my phone and dial Charlotte’s number again, only to get no answer. Thinking quickly, I dial Joshua, who answers after two rings.

“Jamie!” Joshua booms- though whilst he’s outwardly happy to talk to me, he’s clearly unhappy about something- and it doesn’t take a genius to figure out what.

“You saw?” I ask quietly.

“I have, yes,” Joshua says sombrely. “Have you spoken to Charlotte?”

“Not yet,” I say. “She’s not answering her phone. Can- can you go round to see her, please? I’m really worried…”

“Already on my way there!” Joshua replies. “Hate to be the boss from hell, but you’ve got work today!”

“I know, I know, I’m a professional,” I sigh as I slide out of bed and grab my dilating kit. ”Tell Charlotte that I’m thinking about her, and I’ll be there when I can.”

“Of course!” Joshua booms as I hang up the call and start my first dilation session of the day.

“Mmph,” Stuart moans, slowly waking up. “Who was that? Was it Keith?”

“Joshua,” I explain, rolling my eyes as Stuart winces at the sight of the dilator inserted in my vagina. “Asked him to drop in on Charlotte to see how she is.”

“Damn, that reminds me, I’d better call Keith,” Stuart says, grabbing his phone. “And don’t begrudge me calling him, I remind you that HE’S the victim here…”

“Umm, I’ve been friends with Keith longer than you have?” I say with a condescending tone.

“Funny, I don’t recall you trying to call him last night,” Stuart snipes.

“Oh- ugh!” I spit. “You complete arsehole! If I wasn’t, you know, I’d- ugh!”

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” Stuart sighs. “But you know how devastated Keith was the last time Charlotte did ‘her thing’. I’m really, really worried about him. Damn, no answer. He’s probably asleep. I hope he’s asleep, anyway…”

“You’re going to have to apologise a LOT harder than that,” I growl. “Get in the shower now, before I strangle you with it!”

“Yes ma’am,” Stuart says, knowing that he’s lost the argument. After Stuart’s done in the shower, I take his place, before dressing for the day. I’m doing a dancewear shoot with Krystie, so I pull on a fresh pair of pink tights, followed by a plain black leotard (that I’ll be changing throughout the day anyway) and a short purple dress with long lacy sleeves. I head down the stairs with Stuart in silence, but once we’re sat in his car, I lean over and give him a quick kiss.

“That’s for being such a good friend to Keith,” I say quietly. “Even if the way you express it to your girlfriend needs work!”

“It needs rebuilding from scratch,” Stuart laughs as we drive off. When I arrive at the studio for the shoot, Krystie and (unsurprisingly) Nikki are already present, both with sombre looks on their faces.

“Hey,” I say quietly, greeting both girls with quick hugs. “I take it you heard?”

“Yeah,” Nikki sighs, gesturing to her legs, encased in white tights. “Thought I’d dress for the occasion- I'm even wearing a leotard underneath. Seems kinda inappropriate now.”

“In your defence, you only found out when I told you this morning,” Krystie says to the upset teenager. “I don’t think ANY of us saw that coming, especially not after last year…”

“Your dressing room’s all ready,” Nikki says, ushering myself and Krystie toward the aforementioned room. For the next two hours, we try to put our friends’ woes out of our minds as we model endless quantities of leotards, tutus, pointe shoes and various other costumes. Once all the photography is completed- and I and Nikki have untied the tight buns Krystie tied (even though Nikki wasn’t doing any dancing or modelling herself)- I immediately switch my mobile phone back on and dial Charlotte’s number- and yet again, there’s no answer. Thinking quickly, I dial Viks’s number, and to my intense relief, the call is answered before the second ring.

“Jamie, hi,” Viks says. “I take it you’ve heard?”

“We’re all worried sick,” I explain. “Have you spoken to Charlotte?”

“Han and I are here now,” Viks explains. “Charlotte’s holed herself up in her room, she’s not talking to anyone.”

“I’m on my way,” I say, heading outside with Krystie & Nikki and getting in Krystie’s car.

“To Charlotte’s?” Krystie asks.

“No,” I say confidently. “To Keith’s.”

“Are- are you sure that’s a good idea?” Nikki asks.

“He needs a friend right now,” I say confidently. “And he and Charlotte need to speak to each other.”

“Whoa,” Krystie says. “NOT a good idea. The thing they need right now is SPACE. Space from each other, and THEN they can talk to each other once they’ve both had a chance to cool down a little.” I let out a long sigh- in my eagerness to try to restore the status quo, I’d got WAY ahead of myself.

“Fine,” I sigh. “But I’m going to call Stu and get him to drop in on Keith, see if he can’t persuade him to come round later.”

“Fine,” Krystie says. “But ONLY if he agrees.” I nod my agreement as I compose a hasty text message to my boyfriend. Before too long, we arrive at Charlotte’s house, where we’re greeted in the driveway by two blonde women- I instantly recognise one as Hannah, but it takes me a while to realise that the other blonde bombshell is in fact Viks.

“Hey, blondie!” I say to Viks, who simply giggles nervously.

“I figured that since I was quote-unquote ‘divorcing’ my family, I’d also divorce their hair colour,” Viks laughs, before leading myself, Krystie and Nikki into Charlotte’s vast house.

“It suits you,” I say, before my mood turns sombre. “Has- has she said anything?”

“Nothing,” Viks whispers. Cautiously, I approach Charlotte’s bedroom door before gently knocking on it.

“Charlotte?” I say softly. “Charlie, it’s Jamie. Can I come in?” When there’s no response, I lean in closer to the door and raise my voice. “Charlie, we’re all really worried about you, please can I come in?” When I’m met with yet more silence, I slowly open the door into Charlotte’s room, fearing the worst- and my fears are almost realised when I see a series of knotted blankets hanging out of her window.

“Shit,” I say. “She’s gone…”

“Where?” Viks asks with near-panic in her voice. “Where would she go?”

“Last time she split from Keith, she stayed with you,” Hannah muses. “Maybe she’s gone there?”

“She’d have called me first,” I say, before a brainwave hits me. “I know where she is… This is something I should probably do by myself.”

Less than half an hour later- after having exchanged my ballet gear for a slightly more appropriate black dress and black tights- I find myself at the entrance of a small, secluded graveyard. It doesn’t take long for me to find the distraught young woman stood over a plain marble tombstone. On the tombstone is a simple inscription:

Here lies Janice Andrea Easton
14/09/1961-28/08/2005
Beloved mother

“Charlie,” I say softly. Immediately, my BFF lowers her head, before launching herself at me, crying her eyes out into my shoulder.

“Mum,” Charlotte whispers to the grave in a quivering voice. “You remember Jamie, right?”

“It’s nice to see you again, Ms Heaton,” I say respectfully, before turning to my BFF. “You changed the surname, then?”

“I’d change MINE if ‘Charlotte Hutchinson’ wasn’t already a brand,” Charlotte sighs. “Want nothing to do with my dad ever again.”

“That’s why he’s not also here?” I ask, to which Charlotte nods. “Charlotte… You can’t hide here forever.”

“Believe me,” Charlotte whispers, “I’ve been tempted to do just that.” Now crying myself, I embrace Charlotte in a long, tight hug, letting her cry until she has no more tears left.

“Don’t ever feel like that, don’t you dare,” I whisper. “If you ever, even for a second, you call me and it doesn’t matter where I am or what I’m doing, I’ll drop it all.”

“Thank you,” Charlotte blubs as I lead her back to my car. The drive back to Charlotte’s house is conducted in total silence, but when we arrive, all the girls (including Mary, who has arrived with Kristina-Leigh) give Charlotte long, loving hugs, before retreating inside to Charlotte’s living room. An awkward silence fills the room before Krystie speaks up.

“I’ll be the one to ask it,” the tall girl says. “Why? And before you say anything, don’t deny that we’re ALL thinking it.” Every stern glare that was directed at Krystie after her question immediately gets redirected to the floor- she is, of course, right.

“Because I thought I could get away with it,” Charlotte sobs. “He was something new, something exciting… I’ve really screwed up, haven’t I?”

“No, not at all,” Mary whispers.

“Yes,” Krystie says bluntly- though she gives Charlotte a big hug when the distraught girl bursts into tears again. Before too long, we’re joined in Charlotte’s living room by Sarah, Becca and Adeola, and all of us (including Kristina-Leigh) are in our onesies, desperately trying to no avail to put a smile back on Charlotte’s face. Only little Kristina-Leigh is able to get any positive reaction out of Charlotte- when she’s able to persuade Mary to let her hold the infant.

Mary, Krystie and Charlotte are in the middle of another cuddling session with the tiny girl when my phone rings- and the caller ID shows that the person calling is my boyfriend.

“Stu, hi,” I say softly.

“Hi Jamie,” Stuart says with a tired voice. “I’ve got Keith with me… We’re on our way to Charlotte’s.” My nerves flutter as I quickly head into the kitchen. “He’s willing to talk to Charlotte, but… He does want it to be just him and her. Keith doesn’t want to have to go up against an army of girls.”

“Okay, first, they wouldn’t be against him,” I sigh. “Second, it’s hardly an ‘army’, third…” I take a deep breath before mentally putting myself in Keith’s position- if I was confronting an ex-lover I certainly wouldn’t want him to be backed up by half a dozen (or more) of his friends.

“Third…” I say quietly. “…It’s not THAT unreasonable a request. But I’m not letting Charlotte be alone, I’ll be backing her up.”

“Entirely fair,” Stuart concedes. “As long as I’m allowed to back Keith up.” I grimace- going up ‘against’ my boyfriend isn’t something I ever really wanted to do, but under the circumstances, I really don’t have any choice.

“Agreed,” I reply, before heading back to the living room and grabbing Charlotte.

“What is it?” Charlotte asks as she follows me into the kitchen.

“Keith’s on his way,” I whisper, making Charlotte cry. “Stu’s bringing him.”

“Oh my god,” Charlotte blubs. “What- what am I going to say to him?”

“The truth,” I say bluntly. “That’s all you really can say. Keith doesn’t want the girls to be present when you talk to him, he just wants it to be you and him- well, you, me, him and Stu.”

“Okay,” Charlotte says, composing herself. “We-we’ll go to my room.” After explaining the situation to Krystie, who promises to distract the room so that they don’t notice mine & Charlotte’s absence, I take Charlotte up to her room, where she changes from her bright red onesie into a tight top, a flared black miniskirt and black tights- and, of course, killer heels. I change into a similar outfit, though I obviously opt for smaller heels than Charlotte, as Stuart’s also on his way, and we both repair and enhance our make-up. Ten minutes later, we hear the front door unlock, and Charlotte immediately breaks down in a fit of panicked tears.

“Oh my god oh my god,” Charlotte wails.

“Take a deep breath,” I say, gently holding Charlotte’s head. “This is a man who’s loved you for as long as he can remember. Remind him why.” Charlotte nods and calms herself down, though I will admit that as the door handle turns and Keith and Stuart enter the bedroom, even I feel anxious. Keith looks terrible- his hair is unwashed and barely looks like it’s been combed, and he has a generous amount of stubble on his usually clean-shaven face.

“Keith, I-“ Charlotte begins, before being interrupted by the tall man.

“We’re over,” Keith says bluntly. “I told you last year, if you ever did this again-“

“Please, let me explain!” Charlotte wails.

“What is there to explain?” Keith asks. “You’ve crushed me, Charlotte. I can NEVER trust you again. I… I can never love you again.” Tears stream down Charlotte’s face as she pleads with her now ex-boyfriend.

“Please,” Charlotte blubs. “Please!”

“No,” Keith whispers, clearly close to tears himself.

“I’m pregnant!” Charlotte shouts, dropping the jaws of everyone in the room- myself included.

“…I don’t believe you,” Keith says coldly. “Come on Stuart, let’s go.” Almost in an instant, the bedroom door slams, leaving me alone with the distraught girl.

“Charlotte…” I whisper as I lead her to the edge of her bed. “Are- are you REALLY pregnant?”

“I missed my last period,” Charlotte blubs.

“Have you done a test?” I ask, making Charlotte shake her head.

“I don’t have one,” Charlotte sighs. Suddenly, I remember the pregnancy test I bought last December, during the confusion before it transpired that Mary was pregnant. I still have it in my bathroom drawer…

“Come with me,” I say quietly, stealthily leading Charlotte from her bedroom to mine. After a short amount of rummaging, I find the pregnancy test and hand it to Charlotte.

“I bought this last December,” I explain. “When we were trying to figure out who it was who was pregnant. I was going to make you take it, but then Keith said you’d already taken one, so…” Shaking nervously, Charlotte takes the test from my hand and vanishes into my en-suite. A few minutes later, Charlotte leaves the small room, her face white as a sheet.

“Positive,” Charlotte whispers. “I AM pregnant.” Immediately, I rush forward and embrace my BFF in the longest, tenderest hug I can manage. We remain in my bedroom for another twenty minutes, not talking, just holding each other, before my new text message alert breaks the silence.

“It’s from Krys,” I sigh, reading the message. “Think they’ve noticed we’re not there… Do you want to put the onesies back on?”

“No,” Charlotte whispers. “Can’t hide from my problems any more.” I hold Charlotte’s hand, leading her back down to the living room and supporting her as she makes her announcement to the onesie-clad room.

“Keith and I are finished permanently,” Charlotte says stoically, her voice hoarse from crying. Almost instantly, Charlotte is surrounded by a group hug, everyone in the room desperate to show their love and support for the distraught girl.

“That’s not all,” Charlotte whispers. “I- I’m pregnant.” I feel myself starring to tear up as the room gasps and offers yet more hugs and support for Charlotte.

“Yes, the baby’s Keith’s, I’m sure of it,” Charlotte says. “And yes, I intend to keep it. Little Kristina-Leigh needs a playmate, after all!”

“Or a boyfriend!” Hannah jokes, making the whole room laugh- including Charlotte, much to my relief.

“No, she’s GOT to be a girl,” Charlotte laughs. “Arm your girl rays, girls!” I smile widely as Charlotte sits down on her sofa, her smile finally returned as she sees that whilst she may not have Keith- whether temporarily or permanently- she’ll always have the support of her friends. THAT is a mistake she’ll never repeat.

The onesie party disperses a short while afterward, once everyone’s satisfied that Charlotte is happy- or as happy as possible given the circumstances. Krystie stays behind to ‘accompany’ Charlotte to bed, feeling bad about the way she’d earlier spoken to Charlotte- though Charlotte herself was very quick to forgive the tall girl.

As I climb into bed, I compose a quick text message to Stuart, letting him know about Charlotte’s positive pregnancy test in the hope that the news will filter back to Keith. As much as I’m missing Stuart, as much as I wish he was in bed with me right now… I’d much prefer it if Charlotte was happy.

I wake up on Wednesday morning just after 8am, and even though I have the entire day free, I eschew a lie-in in favour of an early start, showering, dilating, applying a moderate layer of make-up and dressing in a short, long-sleeved dark blue dress, shiny black tights and high-heeled ankle booties. I AM planning on meeting with Stuart today so my extra height may make him feel uncomfortable, but they’re my feet, and I’ll wear on them whatever I want. After brushing my hair and touching up my scarlet lipstick, I head downstairs, where Charlotte and Krystie are already awake and eating breakfast.

“Hey,” I say, sitting down next to the two dressing gown-clad girls.

“Hey,” Krystie says. “Hate to have to tell you this, but Charlotte’s much cuddlier in bed than you are!” I let out a quick giggle at Krystie’s joke, and much to my relief, so does Charlotte.

“It’s this one,” Charlotte says, patting her tummy. “God, I’ve got so much to do… Got to arrange scans, got to buy baby clothes, got to turn a room into a nursery…”

“She’s more than welcome to have my room,” I immediate offer.

“Hell no!” Charlotte says. YOU’RE having your room! If I’m going to have to bring up this child by myself… I want my BFF with me.”

“You… You’re definitely keeping the baby, then?” Krystie asks softly. Charlotte simply nods, blinking tears from her eyes.

“Mary’s right in that she says none of us are ready,” Charlotte says. “But I look at how much joy Kristina-Leigh has brought her… Her and Dan…”

“I’ve already told Stu about the pregnancy test,” I say cautiously. “It’ll get back to Keith soon enough.” Charlotte simply nods her head, clearly upset by any mention of the man she still adores.

“He’ll be there for the kid,” Krystie says. “I’ll make sure he is, because if he doesn’t do his part as dad, there’ll be nine angry young women lining up to tear his balls off!”

“Thank you, thank you BOTH,” Charlotte says, gripping our hands. “Guess I’ve got to choose godparents too…”

“Don’t feel obliged to choose me,” Krystie says quietly. “Mary should be higher in ‘the queue’ than me. Though would I be right in guessing that Miss Burke is top of that list?”

“You would indeed,” Charlotte giggles, making me gasp and give the girl a tight hug. “It’s only right that little Jamie has big Jamie as her godmother!” I gasp again and give Charlotte an even tighter hug.

“Oh my god, it’s such an honour!” I squeak. “But- but what if, you know, the baby’s a boy?”

“THAT’s a bridge I can cross when I get to it,” Charlotte says, her mood suddenly lowering. “Jamie… Are you seeing Stuart today?”

“Yeah, that’s the plan,” I say. “I’ll make sure Keith gets the balls-tearing message!” Charlotte giggles before smiling happily at me.

“Just let him know that no matter what he thinks about me,” Charlotte says quietly, “I want him to be involved in his daughter’s life.”

“I’m sure he won’t need threats for that,” I say with a warm smile.

Less than two hours later, I smile happily again as my boyfriend pulls up outside Charlotte’s house in his car. I slide into the passenger seat and give him a long, slow kiss.

“I’m sorry about the last couple of days,” Stuart says with a heavy sigh. “Normally I’d be proud of being a stereotypical boy, ‘bros before’- um, you know, and all that. But… There’s no need for us, you and me, to fall out, just because Keith and Charlotte have.”

“Thanks,” I say with a warm smile. “And I don’t blame you for sticking up for Keith, I don’t… The poor guy must be destroyed.”

“He is,” Stuart says quietly. “And now he’s got the added hassle of becoming a dad…”

“Be fair, it’s probably going to be more hassle for Charlotte,” I say.

“Oh, undoubtedly,” Stuart says. “It’s just- it’s not like they were trying to get pregnant, though it's something I wouldn't put past her..."

"And precisely what is THAT supposed to mean?" I ask angrily. "Are you actually suggesting that Charlotte somehow made herself pregnant to what, 'trap' Keith?"

"Anything's possible," Stuart muses, and I feel my blood boil.

"You are just a total. Fucking. Arsehole!" I spit. "The girl's just found out she's going to become a single parent, and all you can do is point a fucking finger at her?"

"No, I didn't mean it like that," Stuart says, but I'm not done.

"You know, it IS possible to support both Keith AND Charlotte at the same time?" I seethe. "I'm pretty sure Keith wouldn't mind you being there occasionally for the mother of his child?"

"Wow, okay," Stuart says, clearly taken aback by my anger. "Heh, I remember getting those feelings, didn't realise you could get them on HRT. Didn't realise you'd WANT them on HRT."

"What are-" I say, practically choking with anger. "You- did you- I- you- ARGH! Stop the car!"

"I'm sorry?" Stuart asks.

"STOP THIS FUCKING CAR!" I scream. "I don't even want to fucking look at you right now!" Clearly shocked by my outburst, Stuart pulls up at the side of the road, and I immediately grab my bag and storm out of the car, slamming the door in Stuart's face before he can say another word. I grimace out of sheer pain as Stuart drives away, barely holding back tears at our latest argument. We don't get into very many arguments, but when we do, they are truly spectacular. Obviously, Stuart is usually to blame, but I've caused more than my fair share of outbursts from him as well. I find myself almost wishing I didn't love Stuart so much... Then the arguments wouldn't hurt so much.

Now at a loose end for the rest of the day, I bring up Charlotte's number on my phone, but before I call her, I change my mind, cancelling out of her contact page and opening up Keith's instead. Stuart will also be at a loose end and will inevitably be on his way to see Keith- so I need to say everything I need to say before Stuart gets there to avoid any 'awkwardness'. Much to my surprise, Keith answers his phone after the second ring.

"Jamie, hi," Keith says in a much more upbeat voice than I was expecting.

"Hey Keith," I say softly. "I just wanted to check on how you were doing..."

"Bloody awful, thanks for asking," Keith sighs. "Stu told me that you and Charlie had done a pregnancy test... I really need to hear it from you."

"It WAS positive," I say. "I saw it with my own eyes. You ARE going to be a father."

"Assuming the kid's even mine," Keith moans. I open my mouth to give Keith a piece of my mind just as I had with Stuart, but Keith's accusation is far from unfair.

"Charlotte's done some googling," I explain. "She reckons she conceived in the first week of August, neither of you were away that week. The child IS yours."

"You'll forgive me if I ask for a DNA test after it's born," Keith moans. "Jamie, I- I'm not getting back together with Charlotte. I can't put myself through that, not a third time."

"She WON'T cheat on you a third time," I plead. "Not with a kid on the way."

"Fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, shame on me," Keith says. "Fool me three times, just shoot me in the head and get it over with. No, I'm sorry, but no, if the kid's mine obviously I'll offer it all the support in the world, but Charlotte's made her bed, and by god has she ever laid in it. I- Sorry, I'm getting another call on my landline..." Keith puts his phone down for about thirty seconds, before returning.

"Sorry, that was Stu," Keith explains, making me roll my eyes over how predictable my boyfriend really is.

"Is he on his way round to you?" I ask.

"He WAS," Keith says. "I got rid of him. Jamie- can, can we talk face-to-face? You know, in private?"

"Your place or mine?" I ask with a chuckle.

"Well I'm already AT my place..." Keith says.

"I'll be there in a bit," I say, before hailing a taxi and heading off to the upset young man's house. When I arrive, I'm immediately ushered up to Keith's bedroom, where I suddenly start to feel anxious- the last time I entered this room, I nearly ended up having sex with Keith...

"Hey," Keith sighs upon seeing me, and I have to stifle a gasp upon seeing him. Gone is the dishevelled young man who confronted Charlotte last night, and in his place is the clean-shaven, handsome young man I've come to know intimately over the last three and a half years. He's even wearing his best aftershave, the same brand that ties my heart in a knot every time I smell it...

"Hi," I say, dropping my handbag and sitting down next to Keith on his bed. "Just so you know, I would be here with Stu, but he and I kinda had a falling out."

"Hopefully over something less catastrophic than me and Charlie?" Keith chuckles.

"It was ABOUT you and Charlotte," I sigh. "God, sometimes that BOY frustrates me so much, I mean, yes, I understand why he's making a deliberate attempt to be as macho, as stereotypically male as possible, but- gah!" Keith lets out a small, cute giggle at my rant.

"Sometimes he does try a little TOO hard," Keith laughs. "You, on the other hand... You don't have to try, not even slightly."

"Major surgery kinda helps there," I giggle.

"Even before," Keith says. "You know, when it came out that you were- well, you know- I was in utter shock. Not shock that you were- well, you know- but shock because I genuinely couldn't believe that it was physically possible. I know I shouldn't- well, shouldn't HAVE, anyway- but I've ALWAYS been attracted to you, and not just because of how similar you look to Charlie."

"Yes, you've said before 'you went out with the wrong girl'," I laugh. "Dunno how you'd have explained me being 'well you know' to your parents or to the wider world, though."

"My parents ADORE you," Keith says, sliding his hand closer to mine. "Much more than they ever did Charlotte. They don't care that you're 'well you know' OR that you wouldn't be able to give them grandchildren- they've always got my little brother for that. If we'd been going out I certainly wouldn't have 'done a Paul' on you." I giggle a little at Keith’s denigration of my ex-boyfriend, before pulling out my phone.

"You know he's going out with another transgendered girl, right?" I say, browsing to Simone's Facebook page. "This is her." Keith looks at the young woman and nods stoically.

"Cute enough," Keith says. "Bit of a pity for her that she's, well, you know, 'obviously well you know'."

"Yeah," I sigh, putting my phone away. "But she's no less a girl than me. Or Charlotte, Krystie, Mary, Hannah..."

"Oh, absolutely," Keith says with a cute smile. "I'd still take you over her, though." Keith slowly slides his hand on top of mine, and I feel my heart start to race as he leans in toward me and his scent fills my nostrils.

"Keith, I-" I whisper, before Keith leans in and gently kisses me on the lips, a long, tender kiss that relaxes nearly every muscle in my body. After our lips part, Keith looks at me with wide eyes, seemingly in shock at his own actions.

"Jamie," Keith whispers. "I- I-" Rational thought abandons me as I stare at the beautiful young man, and I launch myself at him, kissing him deeply, forcing my tongue down his throat as his tongue explores every nook and cranny of my mouth. Raw, animalistic lust takes over as I yank his t-shirt over his head and throw it to the floor, closely followed by his jeans, my dress and my tights.

With us both clad in our underwear, still entwined in each other's bodies, I reach into my handbag, into my dilating kit for the personal lubricant I use, whilst Keith reaches into his bedside table and produces a condom. I waste no time in reaching into his boxer shorts, where, much to my delight, he is already erect and throbbing. I gently massage his squirming penis as his expert hands unclip my bra, sending it tumbling to the floor. Keith's expert digits massage my almost painfully-erect nipples, his mouth breaking away from mine to pepper them with gentle kisses, whilst his hand reaches underneath the delicate lace of my thong, his middle finger almost immediately finding my small clitoris. I gasp in shock as Keith stimulates the organ.

"Do you want me to stop?" Keith pants breathlessly.

"No," I say firmly. "More!" Keith holds his finger up to my mouth and I give it a long suck, coating it with my saliva, whilst Keith pulls off my thong and throws it into the growing pile of clothes on his floor. Keith's moistened finger than finds its way back to my groin, caressing my clitoris and moistening the inside of my vagina. Sensing that we're both 'ready', I pull Keith's shorts off and roll the latex sheath over his penis as Keith coats the inside of my vagina with a generous portion of lubricant, before we both collapse back on his bed, our hearts beating fast and hard.

Mere seconds later, his latex-covered penis finds its way inside my vagina, and I yell in sheer ecstasy as Keith's organ pushes me to the most explosive orgasm I have ever had in my entire life. Keith himself orgasms mere seconds after I do, pulsing inside me but thrusting gently enough so as not to hurt my no-longer-virgin area. Once we're both 'spent', Keith rolls off the top of me and lays on his back, taking several deep breaths. It's only once I've taken deep breaths of my own and cleared my head, though, that the gravity of what I've done hits me fully.

"Oh god," I gasp, feeling like I've been punched in the stomach.

"You were meant to say that DURING the sex," Keith laughs, rolling over and placing his hand on my bare hip.

"No," I say, jumping off the bed.

"Did- didn't you enjoy that?" Keith asks.

"I did, that's the problem," I sob. "I- I'm just as bad as Charlotte..." Keith looks at me with shock as I pull my bra, thong and tights back on.

"Is- is this about Stuart?" Keith asks, almost as if he's also starting to realise what he's done.

"You've just had sex with your best friend's girlfriend," I spit. "I hope you're happy."

"Jamie- I- I'm sorry-" Keith babbles.

"I'M not the one you should apologise to," I say, shivering with shame as I finish pulling on my dress and my booties.

"Jamie," the still-naked man says, placing his hands on my shoulders. "If you'd told me to stop, I would have. You can't argue that we BOTH wanted this."

"We BOTH made a mistake," I whisper, shaking under Keith's touch. "We BOTH gave into lust, and it must never happen again. Please- please tell me you won't tell Stuart about this..."

"Of course, I promise," Keith says with clear disappointment in his voice.

"And I promise I won't tell Charlotte," I whisper, my mind racing as I can't decide whether to stay and talk about what happened, run out of the building screaming or take Keith into myself once again.

"Who cares about her?" Keith says, tightening his grip on my shoulders before I shake myself free from him.

"I care about her," I say. "If- if she found out about this..."

"It'd serve her right," Keith says, earning a truly evil stare from me.

"I am NOT your 'revenge fuck'," I growl.

"I never said you were," Keith says calmly. "Jamie, if- if it weren't for Stuart, I'd have asked you out the second I found out about Charlotte..."

"I'm not your damned rebound either," I spit, grabbing my handbag and opening Keith's bedroom door.

"I DO love you," Keith says quietly. As ashamed as I feel right now, I still love him... I've always loved him... And if it weren't for Stuart, I'd jump straight into his bed again, right here, right now... But I love Stuart as well, on a much deeper emotional level than I've EVER loved Keith...

"Goodbye, Keith," I whisper, shutting the door behind me. I jump in the first free taxi I find, heading immediately back to Charlotte's house. En route, I check my phone to find a text message waiting that brings tears to my eyes.

'Hey,' the message from Stuart says. 'Sorry I was such a twat, such a misogynist, I have a mouth that's just completely disconnected from my brain and shovels for hands to dig myself deeper with everything I say. I'm on my way to Charlotte's now, I may or may not be wearing a leotard this time. I love you loads, Jamie.' I sniffle and sob as I compose my reply.

'Love you too xxxx,' I reply. 'Sorry I went off the deep end. Will see you there. Love you forever xxxx.' I sniffle again, and the only thing I can smell is Keith's damned aftershave. My body, my hair, my clothes smell like they're saturated in it, and it's all I can do to not have a panic attack as the taxi pulls up outside Charlotte's. Fortunately, Stuart's car is nowhere to be found, so I enter the house and make a bee-line for my bedroom.

"Hey Jay-" Charlotte says.

"Just need to hit the shower," I explain as I run up the stairs, nearly tripping in my high-heeled footwear. "Um, I'll be down in a bit."

"Oh, okay..." Charlotte says, confused by my admittedly strange behaviour. Once in my room, I strip out of my clothes, hurling them into my laundry basket and burying them under my other dirty clothing, hoping that my own perfumed scent will mask Keith's, before I give myself a vaginal douche, checking to ensure there's no damage to my still-new genitals (I've heard horror stories of post-op women having sex before the recommend six months post-op mark- which I am, just- and suffering bleeding and tearing). Once I'm satisfied I'm 'fine' down there, I jump under the shower, letting gallon after gallon of hot water cascade over my body, but no matter what I do, it just doesn't seem enough to get Keith's scent out of my pores. As my tears mix with the water of the shower, I scream in frustration. How could I have been so stupid as to give in to Keith's advances? Why did I 'advance' back at him? I truly AM as bad as Charlotte...

After standing under the shower long enough to start to wrinkle my fingers, I turn off the water and dry myself, blow-drying my hair and wincing as even the hot air of the hairdryer smells like Keith's scent. Dressing in fresh underwear (including patterned black tights) and a cute long-sleeved playsuit, I douse myself in perfume, coating myself in the scent, but no matter how much I spray on, I can still detect Keith's aftershave underneath it. My eyes are almost stinging from the perfume when Charlotte calls me downstairs. I take a deep, nervous breath and skip down the stairs in my stocking feet.

"At last," Charlotte sighs, before wincing at my scent. "Whoa, enough perfume? Where are you going with Stu tonight, a sewage plant?"

"Hysterical," I say, heading into the living room.

"What is that scent, anyway?" Charlotte asks, making me freeze in terror. Has she smelt the aftershave...?

"Um, it's Lacoste," I say. "We did a TV ad for them last month, remember?"

"D'oh, of course," Charlotte chuckles. "Can't stand that brand myself, that's probably why I didn't recognise it."

"Heh," I chuckle as I crash on the sofa with Charlotte. We spend the rest of the afternoon browsing the internet for baby gear, before being interrupted by a familiar knock on the front door.

"Hope you brought a gas mask, Stu!" Charlotte laughs as I open the door, staring sadly into the gorgeous face of my boyfriend.

"Hey," I say quietly.

"Hey," Stuart mock-chokes, earning himself a quick whack from me, before I wrap my arms around his neck and give him a long, loving kiss.

"Normally I'd be making a sarcastic comment about wrapping your arms around me helping," Stuart says happily. "But after this morning... I really do appreciate the hug." I giggle and hold Stuart tighter as he wraps a strong arm around my waist, guiding me back to the living room where Charlotte is waiting.

"Ah, there they are," Charlotte says to her abdomen. "Kristina-Leigh's godparents, and yours too!" Both Stuart and I look at each other, our jaws agape.

"You- you're picking me as godfather?" Stuart asks.

"Of course!" Charlotte laughs, giving the young man a quick hug. "You're the perfect godfather for little Kristina-Leigh, you'll be perfect for little Jamie too!"

"Gender-neutral name, like it," Stuart says, earning yet another whack from me!

"Engage brain before mouth!" I say, making Stuart giggle with embarrassment.

"I've also chosen Joshua and Ellen," Charlotte explains, crashing back down on her sofa. "I spoke to Joshua on the phone earlier, he's understandably concerned but excited at the same time. I reckon he's already planning 'Angels: The Next Generation', heh.

"Won't he be, like, seventy by the time your child's eighteen?" Stuart asks.

"I think so," Charlotte says. "Reminds me: I need to give Ellen a call. I'll also have to break it to her that thanks to Krystie, she WON'T be the one teaching ballet to the kid..." As Charlotte leaves the room to make her phone call, Stuart gently leans into me, giving me a soft, loving cuddle.

"I was totally, completely, one hundred per cent wrong," Stuart says. "Charlotte was NOT deliberately trying to get herself pregnant, and she will make a WONDERFUL mother."

"Apology accepted," I say, snuggling into Stuart's embrace. "Now let's drop this, okay? We should be spending our time loving, not fighting and apologising." I catch myself before saying 'I believe I'm owed make-up sex'- right now, sex is the absolute LAST thing on my mind, but Stuart WILL be confused if I don't demand it...

"Did you say you may or may not be wearing a leotard?" I giggle at the sexy young man. "Because you're not fidgeting as much as the last time we had make-up sex..."

"Yeah..." Stuart says. "I opted for 'may not be wearing a leotard' in the end, to be honest the whole situation's got me knackered, especially with mad week just around the corner, feel like I need to save my imagination, heh."

"I know the feeling," I sigh. "To be honest... I'm just not in the mood for sex, I'd much rather just cuddle here on the sofa for the rest of the day."

"Then that's what we'll do," Stuart says, gently kissing the top of my head. "I really, really, truly, honestly, one hundred per cent do love you, Jamie."

"I love you too," I say happily, desperately trying to suppress my guilt. "Truly, honestly, one hundred BILLION per cent."

"One hundred TRILLION per cent from me, then," Stuart says, making me giggle happily.

We spend the rest of the night helping Charlotte with her baby planning, with Stuart even moving some gym equipment out of Charlotte's gym room and into her dance studio, which is barely used any more since we started dancing at Krystie's class. Eventually, Stuart and I collapse in bed just after 10pm, cuddling each other to sleep as I press myself as tight into his body as possible, hoping that his smell will 'rub off' on me and mask Keith's aftershave- which I can STILL smell all these hours later...

I wake up the following morning to an unusual sensation, which I quickly identify as someone long and hard poking me in the face, first in the cheek, then just under the eye, in the nose... I wake up and flinch at the sight of my long, thick orange dilator being pointed at me like a phallic dagger.

"Sorry, couldn't resist," Stuart giggles, handing me the tube and the rest of my dilating kit.

"Hysterical," I say, before letting out a genuine giggle. "As long as you don't plan on waking me like that every morning after your SRS!"

"Nah, just 4 or 5 times a week," Stuart laughs. "I've, um, I've spoken to Keith." My heart skips a beat as Stuart tells me the news I desperately DIDN'T want to hear.

"Wh- what did he tell you?" I ask anxiously.

"Um, he 'told me' that he wants to come over to talk to Charlotte," Stuart says, clearly confused by the wording of my question. "He 'told me' that he spent yesterday alone having a long think about the situation, and wants to talk it over with her."

"He- he was alone yesterday?" I ask, feigning ignorance.

"Yeah," Stu says. "After we had our little tiff I called him seeing if he wanted to do anything, but I got a politely worded 'piss off' instead. Think he'll be a bit more receptive to human company today, though."

"Good," I say, whipping back the covers and starting my first dilation of the day. "This is usually the point where you avert your eyes, remember?"

"Nah, I've decided that I'm going to be a new man," Stuart chuckles, staring intently at the sight of the dilator being 'swallowed' by my vagina. "Also, there is a kind of sexiness about it, you penetrating yourself..."

"Oh, this is SO getting thrown at you when I'm done," I laugh. "Get in the shower first, I'll call Charlotte to let her know." Stuart giggles as he disappears into my en-suite, leaving me to call my BFF and tell her to get ready- but also not to get her hopes up. After yesterday's 'encounter' with Keith I decide to dress more conservatively when meeting him, opting for opaque black tights, a long-sleeved dark blue bodysuit and a knee-length grey pencil skirt, as well as flats, minimal make-up and perfume. I link my fingers with Stuart as we step downstairs to where Charlotte is waiting. Obviously, she's dressed a lot LESS conservatively than me in translucent black tights, a short black dress that shows off a lot of cleavage and skyscraper heels that put her head high above both mine AND Stuart's.

"Oh god," Charlotte whimpers as a knock comes at the front door.

"Remember!" I say, grabbing my BFF's head supportively. "He loved you for eight years. EIGHT YEARS. That doesn't vanish overnight. Don't expect to get him back, but don't expect to lose him completely either." Charlotte nods as Stuart answers the door, revealing the man with whom I was intimate yesterday. I shiver a little- from nerves- as Keith strides up to Charlotte with a truly cold look on his face.

"Charlotte," Keith says stoically. "I'm not here to get back together with you."

"I- I understand," Charlotte stammers. "I'm so, so, sorry for-"

"I'm not interested," Keith interrupts. "I will support your child."

"OUR child," Charlotte whispers.

"You'll forgive me for asking for a DNA test after the child is born," Keith says, before his face softens. "How- how big is it?"

"Less than an inch across," Charlotte says with a sad smile. "Nothing you could feel yet."

"Can- can I- can I anyway?" Keith asks, prompting Stuart to break his grip on my hand and approach his friend.

"Mate," Stuart says softly.

"I'm okay," Keith says, approaching Charlotte and placing a hand on her flat belly. "It's- it's amazing to think..."

"Tell me about it," Charlotte giggles, placing her hand over Keith's. "Just over 7 months from now..."

"So just a little while after Kate Middleton?" Keith asks, making Charlotte laugh and nod.

"Keith..." Charlotte whispers. "I- I love you. I want us, all three of us, to be a family." Much to mine and Charlotte's dismay, Keith simply shakes his head.

"I'll be a dad," Keith says, his voice filled with emotion. "But- but I can't be with you, Charlotte. I'm sorry, I- I just can't. Come on Stu, let's go." Stuart looks over at me, almost as if asking permission to go with his friend. Still feeling guilty for yesterday, and as a result wanting to get rid of Keith- and his aftershave- as soon as possible, I nod, sending the two men away as I comfort Charlotte, taking her back to the living room where we crash together on the sofa.

"Goddd..." Charlotte says, wiping away a few tears. "It's finally starting to sink in now. Jamie- I'm sorry, I'm sorry this is causing strain between you and Stuart... The last thing I want to do is take you two down with my car crash of a relationship..." I let out a small shudder- if Charlotte knew about me and Keith, she wouldn't be nearly as apologetic...

"We'll be fine," I say. "He's getting better at grovelling, heh."

"Hehe," Charlotte giggles. "You know... Please keep this to yourself?"

"Of course," I say. "What is it?"

"I, um, I sabotaged Keith's condoms," Charlotte confesses in a very small voice. "I thought- I just thought that if we were a family, like Mary has..." I cuddle Charlotte as she bursts into a flood of tears.

"It's okay," I say, allowing the girl to cry her eyes out as I feel even guiltier that Stuart WAS right about the thing I chewed him out for yesterday.

"We'll get the girls round," I say confidently. "I'll call Mary, she can bring round Kristina-Leigh and you can have a good long chat, mommy to mommy. Hell, I'll even call MY mum, see if she can come round. I promise you Charlotte, you will NOT be alone, not during the pregnancy, not after your child is born, not ever."

"Thank you so much," Charlotte blubs, giving me a long, tight hug.

I make the necessary phone calls and within minutes the house is filled with women pledging their support for Charlotte. Mary arrives first with Kristina-Leigh, followed by Viks, freshly moved in with her boyfriend, then Hannah, my mum, even Ellen drops in for a while.

After a day filled with talk of babies, Stuart returns just after the women (minus myself and Charlotte, of course) leave. We quickly find ourselves in bed, where I once again cuddle my naked form against his, even though neither of us have sex on the mind.

"I'm sorry I went after Keith," Stuart says. "I just thought-"

"He needed a friend," I whisper. "I understand. He needs you, just like Charlotte needs me." I pause briefly- if I told Stuart that he was right about Charlotte sabotaging Keith's contraceptives, he wouldn't rub it in my face, I know he wouldn't, but I just can't bring myself to admit that I'm wrong.

"Let's just promise that we'll always be honest with each other, okay?" Stuart says, making me nearly throw up in bed.

"Okay," I say, cuddling myself closer to Stuart. Every day I love Stuart a little more, and if I lost him... I'd be just as devastated as Charlotte is right now. But I still- and always will- love Keith. He can give me what Stuart can't, and obviously I can't have both, as much as I might want both.

As I fall asleep in Stuart's arms, my mind is a mess. If Stuart had a penis, the decision would be so much easier... And lovers or not, I'd like to think that he'd always be one of my best friends... But I've been friends with Keith a lot longer... But if I got with him, I wouldn't be just hurting Stuart, but Charlotte as well... I may even end up as stepmother to her child... As much as that might clash with being godmother...

Why can't my life just be simple?