I've had a few people compliment me on my transition, calling me "brave", and it got me thinking - Am I actually being brave, doing this?
Well, there were a lot of risks - I could have been unable to find work that was accepting, I could have been cut off by my family, I could have lost access to my daughter, I could have had bad reactions health wise to being on hormones, the list goes on.
But since those things didnt come to pass, and my transition is going pretty smothly, all things considered, so am I brave?
Well, its just my feeling but I think there was a moment of bravery, and that's when I called the rape crisis center for the first time, and booked an appointment.
It took me losing my marriage, my home, and several chances to make a life for myself, but I finally realized I simply couldnt do this without getting some help, and I searched until I found the help I needed, and dedicated myself to being honest with the theripist.
Not blowing my own horn, but that took a little guts, in my opinion.
So if you're reading this, and you are waking up to the realization that you cant do it alone, do something about it.
You'll be glad you did.
Comments
I think it's ...
I think it's a combination of things.
For you, it may have been bravery. I don't think it was in my case. It was more desperation. I couldn't go on much longer as I was... And, my transition was a relief. Yes, all those risks you mentioned were there, but - in my case anyway - the alternative wasn't any better, and to be honest was worse. Luckily I've had full (if not always enthusiastic) support of my family, my community/church and my employer... Something most of us don't get.
So - perhaps some bravery is required... Perhaps more for some than others. And, those around us do tend to see our transitioning as an act of bravery. (I know several sisters - who pass far better than I - who are afraid to transition. So, I know fear of transition is something many do have to overcome.)
Best wishes to you as you move along. If there are some who need help, they should try to find it. There ARE resources, even if they don't have the finances (or family - depending on age) to cover a regular therapist, etc.
Annette
Same...
Desperation is my driving factor as well. Once my soul search was done and I came to my inescapable conclusion there were really only two options as I saw it. Start coming out. Or wall myself off again and most likely die this time.
I suppose some people can see me taking the choice I did as bravery. I see it as desperation. No matter what else might be said of me, I never truly wanted to die.
And the real irony of it all? Not only is it easier to explain to people to say that Andrew is dead and I killed him, but my mom actually believes it. So in a way, I still died that day.
And yeah. Most everyone seems to think I'm brave as hell just to walk out the door each morning wearing girls clothes and acting like a girl.
In my own head I'm just a desperately scared little girl who desperately wishes she could cling to mommy, but mommy is pushing her away in disgust. If I really was that scared little girl I'd be confused and heartbroken and still desperately scared. I'm not confused. But I'm still definitely heartbroken and desperately scared.
To be completely fair to my mother, she's no longer pushing me away, but she's not really being very welcoming yet either...
I do it because my only other option is emotional suicide. Spirit death.
Abigail Drew.
Yes Yes Yes
Yes youare brave doing what you are doing BUT you really are a Squaw not a brave LOL
Keep up the good work with your transition HUGS LOVE RICHIE2
You are brave
I swear we've had this conversation before. Overcoming an obstacle doesn't make you brave. Doing something anyway despite the obstacles that you're sure are there is brave.
Am I Brave?
Bravery and courage are needed to do anything that will cost you, so to me, you are both.
May Your Light Forever Shine
Well,
one might say you're not a brave, but a squaw. ...But that would be gender discrimination. Who says women can't fight on horseback with rifles? I prefer to fight on foot with a mighty two-handed sword, but then I'm a Samurai/Berserker MegaTomboy. :)
You are brave!
What you are doing is a life changing endevor and having the courage to continue to move forward is brave. Keep the faith and maintain positive thoughts and you'll do fine. (Hugs) Taarpa
I think you're brave
You could have rolled over and conformed to what society insisted you should be, you could have tried to stay hidden, or you could have taken the big Opt-Out.
I've considered the same options. But you chose to be who and what you really are, regardless of what other people might do and say.