Charlie…15

Chapter 15

There’s times when life happens and you get touched by these moments of clarity. Me it was that final straw of I’m not a girl that was my biggest and that’s been a struggle for me and last week was another one.

When Sable put that necklace charm around my neck and told me she loved me it really crystallized in that space that I love this girl and I think that I might want to spend the rest of my life with her.

Things have changed with us two in the last two months.

Yes two months since I’ve last really wrote about my life. But I’ve been busy in a good way. School’s been awesome and the asshats are starting to get over the fact that I even exist and there’s been three trans-kids all girls that have come out because of me and Sable I guess and a few gay kids too.

That got the churchies off on a wild hair there for like a week but with there being more of the LGBT crowd coming out and stuff the faculty is getting more on the ball about the bad stuff like bullying and hazing.

And part of that is too my newfound popularity on the basketball team. I’m no superstar but I’m actually pretty good too and I try really hard. There’s still people we play that underestimate me and that love to give me shit but hey winning makes the bullshit just exactly that bullshit.

I know that it’s sort of wrong really in my rebel yell psyche but being kind of popular well…it doesn’t suck.

And there’s the fact that I think that Sable has said stuff in the girls locker rooms about me that has me getting speculative looks from some people. Mostly girls and only about half of them are the lesbian crowd. But it’s only looks. Sable is the only girl that I’m really interested in.

Serious? You bet I can’t really go in with her during the meetings but afterwards I go in with a few of the other partners and significant others there. Yeah I think her wanting me there while she goes to her narcotics anonymous meets is pretty serious stuff.

I love doing that though.

It might sound corny but I like being there for her it steeps something in my heart for this is something that a guy should do. It just feels right on so many levels.

Sex has been…more than great it’s been a miracle actually. It’s taken a week or so for me to get used to the new equipment but the weight and the feelings…I can feel it…no not like a real one but that blind man cane thing well clit and attachment here…Even the heft feels right in my head and like I said the sex has been both amazing and life changing.

It’s the feelings if feeling her around me and the resistance of her flesh and all these little nuancey things that turned this experience into something that takes the pressure off. Yes I want the whole thing done but I’m willing to try waiting until they can get it right. Or at least a lot better. My breasts are pretty much gone now mostly from two lypo sessions for reduction but a Lot…yeah caps a lot of working out. The whole female body builders looking like guys is helping me out a lot and add in the hormones and dressed I can pass for a fine boned tanned guy in really good shape. I’m even starting to go shirtless.

Dad’s helping too. We’ve landscaped the back yard getting ready to put in a pool, we’ve done a lot of planting too getting some serious green going on in the yard for mom along with a brand new privacy fence. I actually love doing this kind of work carpentry and landscaping. It’s not just the inherent guy play aspect for me but I’ll admit I like tools and power tools like some girls like clothes.

Honestly I like hard work, I like the smell of dirt and earth and plants. Spruce smells and cedars are two I adore…and is there a nicer smell than fresh cut lumber?

I even picked up some work with the neighbors doing fix up jobs and gutters and painting and stuff. I’ve a great girlfriend now and actually a pretty good idea of where I’m going in life so most of it’s actually going into a savings account. Dad lends me tools and he’s given me a lot of them too just so he can buy is own newer ones but hey I figure I’m ahead of things right?

Lots though to save for…vehicle, college, my business…and honestly a ring. I’m that sure that this is it.

My brother and my sister are still sort of the same with him being his self absorbed usual and Libby well Libby has actually sort of gone deeper into shocked shutting up. It just sort of happened when she had come into my room for something and she saw me in the bathroom…shaving.

No nothing pervy I actually keep pretty smooth because it helps when you’re surfing. More precisely body hair and wet suits do not mesh well together in the long term. Most surfers that use them wax. Chaffing and salt water don’t mix.

No she walked in on me shaving my face.

I don’t have a lot to shave really but the hormones are working and it is happening and I can feel the changes as my body is really trying to make right with me brain. Still though I do have to shave now every three or four days and especially since the coach is pretty clean on the guys being clean shaven.

She just stood there and stared at me.

I could’ve said a bunch of stuff but I didn’t and I just kept going on like this was nothing new.

She’s sort of shut up about my transitioning ever since.

So yeah life’s been actually pretty decent. I know there’s that whole other shoe thing most people expect but not really. I’m a guy that was born a girl, that’s other shoe enough with everything that goes on with all of that.

……………………………………………… I wake up and smile at the scent of Sable lying beside me. She slept over last night and no, we didn’t hit the whole sexual intimacy stuff since it’s Mom and Dad’s house she still slept in the same bed as me and I’m getting to wake up with her in my arms well lying beside me and on my arm which has long since fallen asleep.

“The Bird is the word.” Starts to play on my phone as I have that ring tone set to WaveWatch for the beaches in our area and it’ll tweet me the surf report if it’s a good time to go surfing.

I love that way her lips look when she smiles. “I love that you’re the kind of guy that thinks of a song like that.” She murmurs rolling off of my arm and reaching for my phone.

“Hey I like all those cool old tunes.”

“Yeah and it’s sweet and kind of sexy, their calling out sixes we should go it’ll make for an awesome morning.”

Sixes refers to a six foot wave. That doesn’t sound like a lot but that’s actually pretty decent surfing and when you’re out there it really does translate into some fairly big water. I know there’s a lot bigger and a lot of people surf bigger waves but I’m a hobby surfer not a pro. I surf because I love to.

We get showered and the get into our surf gear and head out in her jeep down to the beach and the waves are actually really good. It’s a heavy and steady rolling tide that has them coming in with nice straight sets.

And there might be eight or nine people here surfing so that’s really good too. We grab our boards and we head out duck boarding through the crests when we need to. Well I like the work out so I actually do a lot of paddling out yeah it’s harder but that’s the point it really helps me build up arm strength.

It’s a really good morning for this there’s so many good waves there’s not a lot of waiting to get one and more than enough room and waves for everyone around too. I love days like this and I can relax and cut loose all I want. It’s really a killer way to burn off stress and it feels just amazing to just flow and cruise or to play and do tricks with the waves. It’s times like this when I’m playing around and doing tricks where I can really get that it was surfers that started skateboarding really.

Sable’s having a great time too and we’re smiling a lot once we come in and even kissing under the fresh water taps. There’s a bunch of guys coming over and two have big professional looking cameras and one has a video camera and there’s a nice looking…not that I’m gay but you know the really well cleaned up handsome Hollywood or entertainment types there with them too.

“Shit…” Sable swears into my shoulder. “I don’t need this.”

“You know these guys?”

“No, but they likely know me.”

“It’ll be okay these guys get all asstarded and I’ll take care of it.”

“Don’t you’ll get into trouble.”

“Yeah well it wouldn’t be the first time.”

I slip sort of in front of her to keep me between her and them. The last thing I really want is them getting in her face first thing today and wrecking her morning. It’s shit like this that bumps and messes with her recovery.

The good looking one come’s up and offers his hand to me. “Donovan Hart, you were really something out there this morning.”

“Uhm…thanks.”

I shake his hand but give him my best go away stare.

“Who to you surf for?”

“Uhm me?”

“Really? You’re not signed?”

“No….” Okay this is taking me in a different turn.

“You ever think about it?”

“Not really.”

He reaches into his back pocket and passes me a card. Runaway Surf? “If you ever think that you might want to try to take a shot at it you just give me a call okay….?”

“Uhm…sure…Oh…Charlie, Charlie Daniels…you might not want me to keep this.”

“Why?”

“I’m transgendered.”

“Oh…well that doesn’t matter I don’t think…if you’re ever interested we can still do it.”

“Can I think about it?”

“Sure thing Charlie.” He looks at Sable and just gives her a nod. “Miss.” Then him and the guys with him leave.

I watch them go and I look at her and she has this amused smile going on.

“What?”

“It’s kind of nice not getting recognized.” She takes the card and looks at it. “You should do this.”

“Why so I can get mocked for being me?”

“So maybe you can break a barrier or two.”

“I’m not a crusader Sable.”

“Then how about I think it’ll be cool.”

“Okay…I’ll think about it.”

Come to actually think about it I can’t think of any TG-Surfers out there either. But I’m more thinking about the money…and her ring.