Charlie…12

Chapter 12

Swish.
Swish.
Swish.

It’s been honestly the best month in my life.

It’s funny how one good teacher can change things. The coach has been that teacher for me. First it’s me on the team. Him giving me this chance and we’ve had three games we lost the first two and we won the third. We actually kicked ass.

And I practice even when at home I’m practicing like right now. Foul shots, lots and lots of foul shots because it’s become pretty evident the other teams aren’t happy with me being on their courts. So the foul me a lot. She’s a chick she can’t make the distance, she’ll toss it underhand.

Yeah, yeah fuck you assholes.

I’m going to get so good at this that every time I’ll stuff that ball down your throats and get even more points.

But it’s been amazing.

We’ve been training with the football team for one. The tire drills, the rope ladder on the ground drill and running the stairs and the best idea is flag football. See no matter the position football players are really good at stopping you. This gets us really used to moving fast dodging and weaving around the guys and actually having a good time.

And the football players get to try to stop guys that are fast plus we all are training and hanging out in this whole cross sport thing that we’ve never heard of being done before.
We had the football team and the cheerleaders at that last game we won. It’s like we’re starting to get this we’re not competing for the limelight because we’re doing so much together. There’s talk about the other clubs doing this too.

And the coaches rules too are awesome. At least for me. Clean shaven, and when we come to away games dress shirts ties, slacks and team blazers. God I love the feel of the clothes.

And the football cheer team is getting more girls together for an all school cheer squad…there was a bit of resistance until the was that they said it’d look on their transcripts for college.

Sable and some of the other girls that are hot yet sort of been snobbed on are cheering now. The coach apparently talked to the cheer coach and they’re doing this who “Breaking the baton.” thing. The girls are talking about the shitty stuff in their lives to the other girls, other kids in school. Sable came clean about her addiction. How she grew up too fast and was too “Good looking.” at twelve that her step-dad and his brothers got her buzzed then doing porn and from buzzed on weed to hooked on heroin…to forget…on coke to buzz her up.

And it got the ball rolling in stuff. The girls started talking about bulimia, anorexia, cutting and they’re just getting started.

I’ve never been to a school that hasn’t really ended up sucking before.

I stop when my Dad pulls in and grab a water and he sets his backpack on the car hood (He doesn’t use briefcases.) and gets out of his dress shirt and tie. And holds up his hands for the ball and we play some one on one until Mom calls up for supper.

“Looking good Charlie, he grabs my arms and does the tone squeeze. I’m actually getting some real tone now. The hormones are kicking in and the layer of girl fat’s going away at a nice rate and I’ve been putting on weight and muscle. I grin because it’s like everyday I look in the mirror I see me a bit more.

“Thanks Dad.”

We head in to eat my brothers absent and out doing his thing with his buddies and Libby’s actually quiet and just looks at me. She’s still not on board but I’m not the pariah I usually am. I’m sure she’s not sure how to deal with me being popular without her looking like a total bitch.

I pack away the food even enjoying that guy thing even though It’s a stereotype. I can’t help it with the working out and the hormones and I guess just my age I go through these starving patches. Mom out did herself tonight with these pork chops that she stuffed with mushrooms and some kind of sauce and a huge salad to go with it and some baked potatoes. I have three chops and seriously chow down on the salad. I’m into this kind of body building stuff. Not like really getting into it like for competition but those female body builders really get a reduction in breast size and I like that and combined with the hormones it’s starting to work.

Down one size.

Right on.

I help do the dishes and do my homework up in my room and spend some time working out and that’s for me every night one hundred push ups in groups of twenty, then twice that for sit ups then ten minutes on the jump rope and another ten minutes on the heavy bad and thirty minutes on my Bowflex. I’m doing the hard and fast work outs I don’t hold back and I’m usually a shaky panting dripping mess by the time I’m done. Then I hit the shower and get clean.

I’m getting better with being naked especially in the shower and the changes were helping too. Like I said my breasts were getting smaller mostly from the working out and really helped by the melting away of more of the girly-fat.

I’m shaving too. I still do my legs but that’s for me. I tried stopping and got a decent grow going but it started to chafe in my wetsuit when I was surfing. I trim my pits but don’t shave them and that fuzzy patch looks right but no…I’m shaving my face.

It’s what dad calls peach fuzz and it just sort of really kicked in one weekend. Mom spent half of it reaching over and feeling it and Dad never stopped with those “Is that dirt jokes.”

It would’ve been perfect except Libby saw it and how we were acting and bawled most of the weekend. We tried to talk to her and it led to her screaming and freaking out that “I” and “You.” as in the rest of the family killed Charlotte.

It was really hard because she wasn’t just being Libby being a bitch then she was mourning me like I’d died.

She recovered of course having gotten used to what’s the inevitable but she’s quieter, even with my being on the team and being sort of popular she’s quieter than she used to be.

Honestly something changed in her eyes when she looks at me now. There’s something gone. And I won’t get that back.

………………………………...Fuck.

I can’t let that stuff get to deep though. It’s hard enough dealing with the hurt and the feelings and stuff as it is without obsessing over someone else’s feelings all the time. I used to do that and it’s a way to fuck yourself up.

Turning it off doesn’t help either. That just builds until you lose it in other ways. Me I work out, get my endorphins running through my body and even yelling as I’ve got my tunes playing.

I will have a punching bag in every home I ever live in.

Seriously even if someone’s a girly frou-frou type getting one of those just works. Wailing on it until my hands ache and I’m dripping sweat while I’m blast something like “Fuel.” by Metallica to me is just as cleansing and balancing as a good cry is for others. Add balance to it by surfing and skateboarding and I’m in better shaped than I’ve ever been mentally and emotionally.

I get dressed tight sports bra, boxer briefs with my Velcro bit to settle “Henry.”

I can’t help but grin. “Henry” got named by Sable when we were a bit beer happy last weekend with one of her housemates Scott getting us a case of beer. Not drunk but happy we were watching some romantic movies and “Ghost.” had came on. Oh and I apparently have this look that if I was a genetic male I’d have a younger Swayze thing gong on. (That’s cool.) anyway that scene where he’s driving Whoopie’s character nuts by singing this Henry the eighth I am. It came from that Sable smiled and rolled over on top of me and while necking was rubbing it and said “Oh Henry.” And that’s been Henry as well as clit…though that we’ve been calling innie-cock, and other things.

Jamie Stevens the wide receiver on the football team got me doing a spit take by calling it. “The angry little man in the cave.”

And has said shit that I actually found funny like. “Charlie’s dick likes pussy so much it won’t leave.” And… “Charlie was pissed that he found out in heaven he was going to be born short. Jesus told him to suck it up and well c’mon it’s Charlie, he just had to take it to far.”

Jamie’s a good guy and he gets it. His little sister is a T-girl and she’s only fourteen and has been through enough. She should go to school with us but she’s in a “Mental Health Care Facility.” it’s a long story but…Jamie gets it and that helps too.

I get into my military styled cargo pants and then muscle tank then t-shirt over that and my basketball jacket and check myself out add some aftershave just a touch of it and head out grabbing my board.

“I’m going to see Sable!”

“Back by two!” Mom shouts and yes it’s two AM and a school night but they trust me. And I’m usually home before that but the times I’m not I better call and just explain why. I have a lot of freedom because I’ve earned it. Good grades, I’m part of a team not, I help out around the house. Libby was given a lot of freedom too but both here and my brother just end up doing stupid stuff.

It’s why my dad has my brother’s car as his right now. Idiot got caught DUI. Dad was fucking livid that he’d drive drunk. None of us seen him punch a hole in the wall before. You know the bad thing about living in a city? The population…Dad took him everyday to a different funeral in the area of someone killed by a drunk driver.

I guess according to my brother dad made him look the family in the eyes and say sorry for you loss.

I shook my brother up good.

Honestly the few times Dad and I ever butted heads I was in the wrong. When I was younger and just a two schools back I was on a power trip. I was going to be a guy and no one and nothing was going to stop me. I wasn’t even on my hormones then I just had so much to prove.

I started as many fights as the ones that got started for me. If dad hadn’t cooled my jets I’d have so go into the wrong crowds and likely would’ve been in jive. I learned my limits when the day came I took a swing at him. I don’t even remember what the exact stuff was about…oh…yeah I had pitched a fit with him because he didn’t stick up for me at school because I brought a knife. I was a little asshole and when I swung at him he acted like any father’s do to his son that raised his hand to him.

I got it really fast.

And I’ll admit the chips still there, but life and feeling better with what feels like the right hormones going through my brain made a huge difference. Surfing has made a huge difference…getting time-distance from what my birth mom did when I came out has helped and Sable.

I smile as I see her behind the counter of Back lot video she waves at me as I slid up with my road board and a baggie with our usual iced coffee’s and a brownie each from Dunkin doughnuts. It’s getting to the point that they know me and I have a usual for nights like tonight and a usual in the morning.

I come in and Sable comes around the counter and we kiss. “Hey Swayze…”

“Hey you how’s work going.”

“Meh, beats my last job.”

I hang around with her while she wipes off the movies. Sable actually will bother to keep the movie cases clean. People handle them and stuff so they get kind of dirty then there’s the ones that are dusty because they’re old. It’s an after school part time job for some extra bucks but she has enough money. The whole porn thing she got awarded all the money that they had made off of her. I still don’t know the whole story but she doesn’t have to work. She chooses to.

We kiss some more but she gets me looking up stuff for movies online. She’s setting up something that she wants to try out. It’s her “Because of…” section. She’s really into movies despite the whole porn associations and Sable has this cool idea to feature a new release then on the shelf right beside it have the movies that influenced it into being even made. But she’s not just talking out her ass either she’s looking stuff and writing a blurb of each of those older movies explaining why they effected the movie.

Seriously cool and smart stuff and we talk about it a lot.

Okay, you really want to get to know your girlfriend and her you? Go to a video store. I mean it go to a video store and just grab a snack and share or hold hands but go and talk about the movies. What you’ve seen, what you haven’t, hated, liked, and it’s something that you can both talk about easily and heck if there’s books. Well shit, now you can talk about books too.

Honestly though I think that if I was with someone who’d say. “I don’t like to read that much.” That’d be a deal breaker.

Sable is a reader, she tends towards reading gothy romantic horror or fantasy and science fiction like Marjorie Liu? And Sherillynn Kenyan? I’m just glad she doesn’t like the Twilight stuff. I’m not into that stuff other than when I used to watch Buffy I had a serious hard on for Faith….but if there’s a strong capable female character in it then she’s into it usually.

She’s even a comic book geek but that Indy stuff mostly though she collected a bunch of female lie titles. Again I’m not into comics but I do like how some of them are drawn…my favorite’s super girl. But them again Sables favorite super heroine is Hawkwoman? And her poster is pretty smoking.

I know, you’d think most little girls would want to be Wonder Woman but not my girl.

Me…I wanted to be Thor. Have the hammer turn me into a real boy. But mostly I wanted to be a policeman or a fighter pilot. Mostly a fighter pilot. Not that I’m looking to join the air force but when I was six and seven of course right? You had to be in the air force to fly a jet pack right?

Now? I’m actually not sure what I want to do with my life. I’m kind of leaning towards being a mechanic though.

I stay until closing with her and that’s nine and I walk her home at ten after she’s done doing her till I stock the chips and the pop cooler while she mops. We hold hands and talk about school, the games and stuff going on in cheer or sociology which we’re both taking and that’ a lot like social studies but more grown up. Like talking about how social media networks like face book and stuff like Twitter have changed things.

I like school now more than I ever did. I love talking to Sable about these things I mean even school work because it’s like I really want to kiss her whenever she says something interesting but then again she’s always saying something interesting. Like tonight it’s her talking about the GOP and women’s health care and the elections and how she really see’s the whole lazy stupid American thing sometimes because after seeing what social networking has done in other countries in regime changes…we just seem apathetic to the injustices happening.

It’s that and her movie idea and I swear she’s like a cinema genealogist we get to her place and I turn her to kiss me after she’s got her door unlocked. It’s long and deep and Sable wraps her arms around me and pulls me tight to her and I love the feel of her big full breasts pressing into me.

“Stay?”

“I have to be back by two…”

“Your brother right?”

“Yeah, I don’t want to push things.”

“This weekend…after Saturday’s game?”

“Yeah I think I can swing that.”

“Good…I know we’ve been taking it slow Charlie but…I want you…I want us to take the next steps okay?”

“Yeah…” My mouth’s dry but I’m not…I’m hard just thinking about Sable naked and while I’ve seen the porn she made it’s to the same as touching her in real life and her touching me. I’m scared of that, of where this might and could go but she’s right we’ve been dating over a month without sex… “Yeah I want to too Sable…”

She kisses me. “G’night Swayze, I see you at the beach.”

“Uhmmmm…yeah.”

She closes the door smiling at me and giving me that cute finger wave goodnight and I smile back for her and walk home actually and get in just after midnight and get a beer for me and for dad and he’s in the easy chair watching the news, mom’s under a blanket on the couch asleep. He looks at the beer then at me and the beer I have.

“Wanna talk about it?”

“Please.”

“Alright c’mon and get the rest of the six pack.”

I do and he’s got the gas grill going already and he does something he did with his dad and even further back I guess.

You talk to your dad late at night and we do it with a few drinks and a bacon sandwich. It just fits as I take that first bite just bread and the grease and the char from the grill on it and just some HP sauce. I wash it down with a drink of beer.

“Sable wants to take things to the next step dad…so what do I do?”

He takes a huge bite of his own and chews sort of thinking and smiling a bit then says….