Here's chapter 11 of The Ram.

The Welsh Mountain Ram 11

Briony Betrayed wife and mother.
Sion Her eight-year-old son.
Ellairy Her nine-month--old daughter.
Arfon Brionys’ unfaithful husband.
Dave. Welsh bachelor hill-farmer.
Jenny and Lassie Daves’ sheepdog bitches.
Laddie. Daves’ sheepdog.
Jessica and Pansy Daves’ sows.
Angel Daves’ mare.
Gabriella (Gabby) Angels’ foal (Gift to Sion.)
Daphne Daves’ ‘girlfriend’
Cledwyn. Farmer further down the valley (Neighbour.)
Blodwen Cledwyn’s daughter.
Rachel Daphne’s TV friend.
Shirley Rachels’ GG wife.

Briony awoke to find her bed empty and the low winter sun painfully bright as it reflected of the melting snow. For a moment she panicked then relaxed as she heard a knock on the door and Ellairy’s familiar cry.

“Come in!” She answered.

The bedroom door opened and Dave appeared with Ellairy in his arms.

“She wants feeding Bri’ sadly I can’t give her what she wants. I’ve changed her and given Sion his breakfast. Are you ready to get up?”

“Yes. What time is it?”

“Half nine.”

“Oh my God! She’s late for her feed.”

“Well, Sion came into my bedroom about an hour ago asking to go and see Gabby the foal. I took him down, gave him some breakfast and we went to see the foal. He’s still with Angel and Gabby. I was coming back upstairs when I heard Ellairy whimpering so I sneaked in on you. You were fast asleep so I collected her and took her downstairs to change her.”
He gently passed the newly changed baby to Briony and turned to leave but Briony called him back.

“There’s no need to leave. I’m only going to feed her. Lets chat a while.”

“Won’t you want your breakfast?”

“Later darling. Just sit on the bed and chat.”

“Don’t you mind, you know, showing your breasts.”

Briony giggled as the idea tickled her.

“Well I’ll show you mine if you show me yours.”

Dave snorted as he realised the fatuousness of his concern.

“Sorry, yes you’re right.” He observed as he sat on the edge of the bed.

“So what d’you want to chat about?”

“How long will it take to get to Machynlleth?”

“It’ll be about four or five hours. I’ve just spoken to Cledwyn on the CB radios. He says the road is clear below Dan-y-Nant Hill. Blodwen was down there on her horse this morning. She’s out clearing their bit of road as we speak. I’ll have to get cracking on my bit.”

He glanced enviously as Briony attached Ellairy to her breast. Briony smiled as she recognised Daves’ emotion so she spoke softly as she noted his feelings.

“You wish you could do this, don’t you?”

Dave nodded as he swallowed the lump in his throat then added.

“I wish I could conceive and carry a baby. It must be the most rewarding and fulfilling thing on earth.”

“And the most painful.” Briony added.

Dave nodded slowly and resignedly.

“Yeah, but ... the pleasure must surmount the memory of the pain. I mean, when you look at your son growing up and stuff. It must fill your heart!”

Briony smiled and tried to settle back into the pillows. They were too low and her hands were occupied holding Ellairy. Dave recognised the problem and promptly eased Briony upright then fluffed up the pillows so that she could sit up. Her other breast flopped out of the nightie that Daphne had lent her but strangely she felt no threat. She left it exposed as Dave adjusted the duvet then resumed sitting on the side of the bed.

“Thanks darling. Arfon has never once done anything like that. You’re sweet. Daphne’s still there isn’t she, still inside your head.”

Dave smiled.

“She’s always there. She watches over me like my mam and nan used to.”

“Oh that’s sweet, that’s really lovely.”

Briony reached out to squeeze his arm but Dave eased it away defensively. He felt he might have revealed too much. He cautioned her.

“Don’t ever tell anybody that. They’ll say I’m schizoid or something.”

Briony wagged her head.

“No Dave. Daphne is not some figment of your imagination. I’ve met Daphne; I’ve spent a whole Christmas with her. She’s a wonderful girl and she will make me a wonderful friend; I want her to be my friend.”

She reached out again and took his hand, this time Dave let it stay. He turned to meet her smile with a rueful look as he sighed.

“You’re nice Briony. I wish other women were as understanding as you.”

“You’re nice to, I want to kiss you. Come here.”

She patted the bed beside her. Dave slid across hesitantly and extended his lips like a small boy receiving a kiss from some ancient relative. Briony growled affectionately.

“Not like that silly! I want a proper kiss, an embrace with your arms around us.”

Dave rearranged himself so that he was kneeling on the bed beside her and his weight caused the mattress to sag so that Briony slid and tilted into his arms. Ellairy made a little whimper and Briony tried to detach her but Dave reached around her and held the infant to her.

“You’re her mum. She’s every right to carry on feeding.”

With this he readjusted his embrace and gently pulled her face to his. Their lips met and stayed met for several minutes as Brionys’ heart started to race. Eventually, Briony had to transfer Briony to her other breast but Dave seemed to sense it and he released her momentarily. While Briony was making her baby comfortable, Dave repositioned himself to resume the embrace. She snuggled her back up to his unmanly chest and savoured the softness that seemed to reflect every aspect of Daves’ character. He wrapped his arms around her and Briony had never felt so wanted, so valued, so happy. Dave had never felt so accepted and so relieved. To have a girl quite content to seemingly accept his feminised chest had been his subconscious quest since he came to terms with his transgenderism. They lay together on Brionys’ guest bed until Ellairy had finished.

As Briony felt herself going dry she turned to Dave.

“Do you have to clear the road today?”

Dave sensed the implication and squeezed Brionys’ shoulders as he ‘got the message’

“I’m afraid it’s in the councils’ contract. I must make every reasonable and safe endeavour to maintain a free, safe route across the mountains. It affects the emergency services access. Besides it’s for our mutual benefits and I can’t let my neighbours down. I’d love for you to stay for the rest of our lives but the job has to be done.”

Briony flushed with a warm feeling at these words and she raised her lips upwards to offer a kiss.

“Thanks, that’s a lovely thought. You’re a lovely guy. I wish all men were like you.”

Dave sighed thoughtfully.

“What, even with Daphne always lurking.”

“Especially with Daphne lurking; I can see her and me becoming great friends. Especially with her shopping skills; those clothes she bought for Christmas were really nice. Besides, it’s obvious that Daphne has got you really house-trained.”

Briony was startled for a moment as she felt Dave’s chest begin to heave with laughter. Then he burst into sound and Daphne thought it the sweetest music to her ears. Usually, mens’ laughter tended to grate on her ears, often because the source of the amusement was offensive to women but this laughter sounded clear and almost sweet; soft and modulated.

‘Somewhere between tenor and alto; almost neutral in pitch just as Dave/Daphne seemed neutral in gender orientation as he/she flipped either side of the conventional divide.’

Briony found this refreshing and in some way strangely re-assuring. It was as though she would always have Daphne to call upon for support when she found herself at odds with Dave.

‘At odds with Dave!’ She pulled up sharply. ‘Had she already concluded her answer would be yes if he were to ever pop the question?’ Then she concluded with satisfaction that it would. She had only known him a couple of days, but Dave was the one. That much her heart and her head both knew for certain.

As Ellairys’ last attempt to suckle sent a twinge of pleasure-pain through her empty nipple, Briony was brought back from her thoughts to reality. She twitched reluctantly for she did not want to destroy the moment.

“I suppose I’d better get up if you’re going to plough the snow.”

Dave sighed as well for he had also been savouring the pleasure of simply cuddling. He gently eased Briony forward and inched himself from behind her, then he held out his hands and took Ellairy off Briony as she tucked in her boobs and made herself ‘respectable’.

It was only just in time for at that moment Sion arrived ready to enjoy the rest of the day.

“Can we have another snow-ball fight?”

Briony wagged her head.

“Uuhhm, I’m afraid there won’t be time darling. Dave has to clear the road with the big tractor while we follow on in his Landrover. We’ll be in your aunties’ tonight.”

Brionys’ heart thudded as she saw Sion’s tears begin to leak. It was obvious that her son was desperately trying to hide his feelings. Her stomach sagged as a lead weight settled in her stomach as Sion turned hopefully towards Dave. Dave wagged his head and pulled a wry expression as he tried to explain.

“Your mum has to get to her sisters and organise the repair of her car. Then she’ll have to organise a tow to Machynlleth and get the car repaired. Try not to be disappointed. You’ll be back here when you pick up the car, and you can visit your foal in the holidays. It’s not that far to Machynlleth, just narrow and winding. In the summer you can visit here any time provided you phone and let me know. I’m often out.”

Sions’ lower lip trembled as he expressed his wishes.

“I’d like to live with you here, If you married my mum I could live here ... and look after Gabby.”

Briony gasped at Sions’ forthright statement but secretly she knew in her heart, that was exactly what she would have wanted.

She wondered if Dave was being so reticent because he suspected she might be a ‘gold digger’ or she might later try to black-mail him with some future divorce over his transgenderism and thereby win a slice of his estate. She wondered how she could convince him otherwise.

‘Besides,’ she reflected bitterly, ‘she was already married to that brute Arfon! And if he contested the divorce there was no knowing what sort of complications might be thrown up.’

She excused herself and stepped into the bathroom while Dave changed Ellairy again. Sion watched and grinned.

“Dad never changes her. You’re good, you’re faster than mum even.”

Dave shrugged and smiled.

“Have you ever changed her?”

“Heck no!” Sion squealed. “She stinks when she’s done a poo!”

“Oh well I’m used to barnyard smells. Most of the animal poo stinks worse than Ellairys’. That’s one thing you’ll find if you ever have to muck out Gabby. This is nothing.”

As he was re-buttoning Ellairys’ baby-grow Briony emerged and smiled.

“There was no need. I would have done that.”

“Job’s done now. She’s clean unless you want to bath her.”

Briony continued smiling.

“You like kids don’t you. Which one loves them the most, you or Daphne?”

Dave furrowed his brow and replied.

“D’you really need to ask?”

Briony grinned and replied. “Daphne.”

Dave grinned back and nodded before declaring.

“Well, you’d best get a good breakfast inside you and take some extra blankets. Just in case anything untoward happens. I can’t
see it what with it thawing this quickly but better safe than sorry.”

“Can I ride up on the eight-thousand with you Dave?” Sion begged.

Dave glanced at Briony who smiled and asked.

“The cab is heated isn’t it?”

Dave nodded and Briony agreed. Sion was soon back to his usual self and they started preparing for the task ahead, firstly by making sure everybody had a good hot lunch then checking everybody had got everything. This basically devolved to Briony because Dave was unfamiliar with who owned what. Instead he started the eight-thousand tractor and brought it right to the utility-room door then he filled the Landrover up and left it ticking over to get properly warm for Briony and Ellairy.

By noon they were on the road with Briony following close behind Daves’ tractor while Sion sat in the back-hoe bucket seat facing backwards where he could see his mother and she could see the ear-splitting grin on his face.

Brionys’ heart remained filled with delight as she watched him chattering to Dave while he manoeuvred the huge tractor with the front bucket to make short work of the evanescent drifts. By three o’clock, ahead of schedule, he was down at Cledwyns’ farm. Blodwen met him at the gate, gave him a brief peck and collected the tractor so that she and her dad could use it’s wonderful all-weather capability to deliver feed to both his own flock and Daves’ that were flocking together on lower moors where the grass was slightly greener and they shared grazing rights. More importantly the weather was much milder.

When Briony saw Blodwen give Dave a hug and a kiss she couldn’t help but feel a spike of jealousy pierce her heart. Then she remembered Dave saying something about Blodwen not being interested in farming and she decided to ask Dave a bit more about ‘the-girl-next-door’.

As Dave and Sion entered the Land-rover, Briony was watching the great yellow tractor that appeared to be simply smashing its’ way through drift after drift.

‘Whatever else Blodwen did, she certainly knew how to handle the tractor.’ Briony concluded.
Her reflections were interrupted by Dave.

“If you want, I’ll drive. Blodwens’ tractor is a smaller machine and the bucket doesn’t clear such a wide path.”
Briony shifted over, thankful to leave the controls to Dave. She’d had a few slippery moments behind the big tractor and she could see that the path cleared by Blodwen reflected the size of their tractor and bucket. It was narrower with more pronounced banks that left little room for manoeuvre. Besides, Dave knew the road.

As Dave picked his way sometimes avoiding the banks and sometimes cutting through them to widen the path, Briony realised Dave was using the Landrover like a second snow-plough. She decided to probe a little about Blodwen.

“How long have you known that girl Blodwen?”

“All my life, we went all through school together, shared the school run for fourteen years. We’re the same age then she went to college, studied architecture and practices in Birmingham. She’s only home for Christmas. As Cledwyn gets older she’s happy for me to run their farm while she gets on with her own life.”

Briony felt a little thrill of anticipation tingle through her core.

“She gets on with her own life?”

“Yeah, she doesn’t much like farming. She was always the maths and science girl ... good artist too. That’s why she became an architect. That painting of my dad in the Kitchen was done by Blodwen, I’ll always treasure it.”

“Where you ever close; you know ...?”

Dave smiled.

“When we were youngsters, we played together all the time. There’s nothing much I don’t know about Blodwen and nothing much she doesn’t know about me.” We used to ride our ponies all over these mountains. Wonderful times we had, right up until Blod’ went to college.”

Briony felt less sure. The way Dave spoke, there was obviously affection there but seemingly never ever a relationship. She hesitated then asked.

“Does Blodwen know about Daphne?”

Dave smiled and pulled the car over.

“There was never any relationship between us and truly there never will be. Blod is gay and yes, she does know about Daphne but only since she left college.”

Briony felt a surge of relief and slumped back into the seat. Dave sensed her relaxation and the smile dropped slightly.

“I know what you’re feeling. Your relieved there seems to be opposition, no obstacles ... except of course your own. It wasn’t always like that, I was very fond of Blod. You can see she’s a very attractive girl and all the boys in school envied me for having her all to myself every day on the school bus then every weekend. She used to tell her circle of female friends all about our riding weekends and that got back to the boys. That’s when they began to think I was gay because I was slightly built and not very forceful with the girls. I made a play for Blod in our early teens and I could never get near her. Then, finally, she confessed to me when she was fifteen. She found out from the other girls that I could keep a secret. And she knew that I never spoke of our first, failed fumblings. The boys told the girls they thought I was gay because I hadn’t even got to first base. When the girls asked the boys why they thought I was a poofter they said because I never spoke of having it away with her. Yet when the other boys tried it on with Blod she always used to say she was going out with me. She was beginning to realise she was lesbian and she was using me to hide her sexuality.. I never did push it and she so got to trust me, she told me she was gay and she never told her mum and dad.

Both my dad and her parents always thought we were destined to marry. Then she went to college, and I stayed behind to help run our farm. Cledwyn still thought his daughter and I would marry and out farms would be combined to make a pretty big and efficient unit. Then my dad died when I was nineteen and I was plunged in at the deep end. Cledwyn and the accountants helped me out and Blodwen always came over in the college holidays. We went out several times but I already knew we were never going further. She settled in Birmingham and I didn’t see her for a couple of years.

By that time the farm was doing well and Cledwyns’ labourer was more than prepared to stand in for me when Daphne went to the gay village ... first in Manchester, Canal Street then later, in Birmingham, Hurst street.
That’s when Blodwen met Daphne."

"Oooh go on," Briony pressed eagerly.

"Well; Daphne was dressed to the nines, really dolled up and having a riot of a good time with her new tranny friends when she spotted Blodwen with a friend, a girlfriend. Blodwen hadn’t got a clue who Daphne was and by now Daphne was well and truly ‘out’ in Birmingham and Manchester. My friends, my gang were fooling about on and off the dance-floor being the lives and souls of the club when Blodwen came in with her equally pretty girlfriend They're both ‘lipstick-lesbians’. She won’t mind me saying that, cos’ that’s how she describes herself.”

“Go on,” Briony pressed Dave.

“Well when I spotted her I was actually fooling about on the stage and Miss Vicky the resident drag queen let me borrow her microphone. I called across the club on the mike and of course all my friends stopped to look as they recognised my voice.

“Hi Blod!” I called. 'Why haven’t you brought your horse Flossie? She’s missing you!'

'You could have flown a Boeing into her mouth she gaped so wide!'

“How do you know Flossie?” She gasped.

“ ‘My horse at that time was Raven, he and I have known Flossie for years.’ I replied.

Well Blodwen just stared at me for what seemed like minutes as more of her lesbian friends asked how I knew about her. She came right up to the front of the stage and I introduced her to the whole club. ‘Ladies and gentlemen and others, I would like to introduce my oldest and dearest friend Blodwen. She doesn’t know me as the crackpot crazy tranny girl Daphne, she knows me better as her old school friend and classmate Dave!!! We were next door neighbours as children and now I think she recognises me.”
Poor Blodwen just slumped into a convenient arm-chair and stared at me as her friend demanded to know what was going on.”

“It is you! It’s Dave!”

“The very same Blod, and you never, never knew!”

“My God girl, you look stunning! Why did you never say?”

“What could I say?” Dave continued. “I explained about Daphne and how terrified she was of ever being discovered. Then Dad died suddenly and whilst I was suddenly encumbered with all the running of the farm, Daphne could spread her wings and fly. ‘So here’s Daphne Blod, all grown up, free as a bird and flown all the way to Birmingham.’

Since then, we’ve never looked back. I think Blod thinks more of Daphne than she ever thought of Dave, I knew this much, when Daphne goes to Birmingham, Blod makes every effort to meet her. We are very good friends but that’s it. Just friends; though we love each other dearly as friends.”

Having finished the explanation Dave resumed picking his way down the road and steadily his speed improved as the snow receded. They reached Machynlleth at six o’clock.