Two final snapshots of Denise and Samantha

A Summer of Changes
by Louise Anne Smithson

Book 5 Chapter 8

Epilogue — Denise and Samantha

On a Saturday morning in June 2006, at Denise’s mother’s house in Norwich, Samantha helped her friend to attach the small silver locket round her neck, and then checked that her hair and makeup looked alright.

‘Those are quite an attractive pair you now have,' she said looking at the plunging neckline of her friend’s bridesmaid’s dress, towards her brand new, genuine, breasts.

‘Well since I was paying for a boob job, I felt that I might as well have a decent sized pair,’ answered Denise. ‘Dan wanted me to go one size larger, and even offered to pay for the operation, but it is my body and I did not want to look top-heavy just to satisfy his male fantasies.”

‘They look great, and really suit you. Did the operation cause you any pain?’

‘No. not really, my new breasts were a little uncomfortable for a few days afterwards, but they soon settled down, and the scars are entirely hidden underneath. They are infinitely better than those awful silicone boobs I used to wear. I timed the operation so that I would be recovered in good time for Julia’s wedding, and insisted that she chose us bridesmaid’s dresses that would enable us show off our assets.’

‘I feel a sham dressing up and acting girly as a bridesmaid in front of my family and friends, when everybody knows that I am a dyke and have a female lover waiting for me in the audience,’ said Samantha.

‘You are no more of a sham than I am, as a pre-op transsexual, and your lover will be sitting next to my boyfriend,’ replied Denise. ‘But why shouldn’t we dress up to help members of our families celebrate their marriage, if we are invited to do so?’

‘I suppose I feel out of place because I will never get married myself, but at least our friends and families seem to want us as a team, to help them celebrate; this is now the third time that we have been bridesmaids together,‘ said Samantha.

‘Yes, and it is my fourth time in all; remember I was a bridesmaid to my friend Angela when she came back from Singapore to get married.’

‘Poor Denise, “Always a bridesmaid and never a bride,”’ said Samantha. ‘But there will be nothing to stop you and Dan getting married next April, once you received your Gender Recognition Certificate.’

‘Yes there will; my refusal in the unlikely event that he should ever ask me. I love Dan and he has taught me a lot about being a woman, but I will never marry him. Ultimately he needs to have a family, and that I can never give him. I intend to stay with him until after my operation, so we can both enjoy the benefits of my new vagina for a few weeks, but then I will gently let him go, and eventually die an old maid.’

‘At times you are so calculating Denise.’

‘Perhaps, but, if I am, it is not just for my own sake. After all, my letting your cousin go was the best thing that I could possibly have done for him and my sister, as we will see later this afternoon. But what about you and Jo? Although you may not be able to get married, you would be able to have a Civil Partnership.’

‘I don’t think that is very likely either. Jo is great fun to be with, and the sex has been wonderful, but you can’t have two dominant characters in a successful lesbian relationship. She was attracted to me because of my girly looks, but there will soon come a time when she will realise that she is really looking for is a little lady to stay at home and look after her, and I am afraid that isn’t my scene.’

‘I am sorry to hear that, I thought you were getting on fine,’ commented Denise.

Sam shrugged.

‘In any event, Jo wants to do a Masters’ Degree at Liverpool University in September, and there is no way that I am leaving London, particularly as Jane is about to have another baby. It will just be one of those college romances that was good whilst it lasted but came to a natural end when we both graduated.’

Sam seemed sad at the prospect and so Denise hugged her, frightened that her friend might start to cry and spoil her eye makeup.

‘Sam, you are such a lovely person that I am sure you will find someone to share your life.’

Samantha pulled away, anxious to change the subject. She hated it when Denise was so affectionate towards her.

‘By the way, when will you have your operation?’ she asked.

‘It will be in just over a month’s time, soon after my twenty-first birthday.’

‘Any second thoughts?’ she asked.

‘Good heavens no! Becoming Denise has been the most important thing I have ever done, for my sanity and well-being. I would have had the operation last year but Doctor Spencer wanted to assess the results of the hormone therapy first, and in any event, I was not able to afford it, at the time.’

‘Well in that case I hope it goes well and that you achieve what you are looking for in life.’

‘Thanks, and I will always be glad to have you as my special friend.

Denise now checked her friend’s outfit and makeup.

‘You do look lovely, Sam, if I were a man I would really fancy you,’ said Denise.

‘If I were a man, I would fancy you too,’ she replied.

The two bridesmaids hugged one another again and then went to the room next door to help the bride to get herself ready.

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Three years later Helen Armstrong helped her young business partner into her wedding dress and to put on the veil. Helen was conscious that she owed the young woman standing before her a considerable debt. It had been largely through her talents and enterprise that the small business she had run for so many years had grown to be one of the major British fashion wholesalers in just five years. Inviting her to a become a partner had been the most astute thing she had ever done, and had secured her own future financial prosperity. Now that her partner had decided to settle down and wed, Helen had called in a few favours to ensure that she was able to borrow the most beautiful designer wedding dress imaginable. It was a slim line, strapless gown in ivory gossamer silk chiffon, gathered under her bust and with a long, loose skirt. There was a sweetheart neckline, which showed off her white breasts to good advantage, together with a beaded motif which accented her already slim waist.

‘My goodness Denise you look absolutely stunning as a bride,’ said Sue, as Helen finally finished her work, and the three of them stood before the full-length mirror.

Denise smiled.

‘Thank you. You looked pretty good yourself on your wedding day, as I remember,’ she answered, but pleased with the compliment nevertheless.

‘That maybe so, but your dress is so gorgeous, and it suits you so well.’

‘I have Helen to thank for that. I have learned an awful lot about fashions over the last few years but I have never developed the eye she has for what clothes will look good on someone and flatter her figure.’

‘That will come in time Denise, but I have to say I agree with Sue, you do look truly radiant.’

Denise blushed with pleasure knowing that it was not just an empty compliment but the opinion of an expert.

‘That was the one thing I insisted upon when Sam asked me whether I would be willing to enter into a Civil Partnership with her. I told her that I would do so on condition that I got to wear a wedding dress at the ceremony,’ she said laughing. ‘I tried to persuade her to wear a wedding dress as well, but she said she did not want to compete with me.

Denise had decided not to have any bridesmaids as it was not going to be a large church ceremony, just the registration of a Civil Partnership in the local Registry Office. Instead she had invited Sue to act as her matron of honour. The choice was perhaps inevitable as her own sister was eight and a half months pregnant and not in a position to undertake any role other than spectator, and Alison and her family now lived overseas. Her friend Jane would be looking after her sister and ensuring that she made it to the registry office on time. Sue no longer worked for Helen and Denise’s business, she and her husband now ran a successful business of their own, but she was one of the freelance photographers most frequently used by them.

‘So what is Samantha going to wear for the ceremony?’ asked Sue.

‘I am not sure. I just hope she hasn’t chosen something too mannish, it won’t suit her,’ said Denise anxiously.

‘I don’t think you need to worry,’ said Sue. ‘Jane won’t allow her sister to commit any really serious fashion crime.’

‘We agreed that we would both make our own arrangements and not meet again after we completed the legal formalities yesterday, until the ceremony itself, but I am now worried that I might tower over her with these shoes,’ she said pointing to the ivory coloured high heels she was wearing.

‘Now don’t worry, you will both be fine, I am sure,’ said Sue trying to calm the nerves of her friend.

She looked for another subject to take Denise’s mind off the forthcoming ceremony,

‘So who will be wearing the trousers in your household?’ she asked.

‘What Sam chooses to wear will be up to her, I tend to prefer wearing dresses myself, but I assure you it will be a partnership of equals. We are both now earning good salaries, and we will do equal shares of the housework.’

‘Where are you planning to live?’ asked Helen

‘We will stay where we are for the time being, but Sam’s father is giving us the deposit for a house as a wedding present. We are looking at a place that is currently being built in Croydon.’

‘He did the same for Jane and Peter, when they got married. You are both very lucky’ said Sue.

‘But what do your mother, and your sister, think of you settling down to live with Sam,’ asked Helen.

‘They are probably relieved that I am now settling down. I did rather play the field and went through quite lot of men after I had my operation, before I came to my senses and realised that it was Sam who I really felt most comfortable with. She has always been there for me, even when I was being bitchy when I started taking the hormones, or promiscuous after my operation. I suspect my mother probably now wonders why I spent so much money on having a vagina, when I have ended up sleeping with a woman, but having sex with a woman who truly loves you is far more satisfying than with a man who is just wanting short-term gratification. I have no regrets about any thing, I never felt that I was entirely a woman until I had the surgery.’

‘What is a vagina, Aunty Denise?’ said a little voice from the doorway.

A little girl aged about four and a half years and wearing a long ivory dress had come in to the room without anyone noticing. She was admiring herself in one of the full length mirrors in the dressing room.

‘Nothing for you to worry about young lady,’ said Denise picking up her God-daughter and giving her a hug. ‘You look very pretty today, Alice, just like a princess.’

The little girl beamed at the compliment.

‘Mummy says that the guests are all seated and that Aunty Sam is now ready.’

‘In that case we had better go and join her, hadn’t we. Now are you going to hold these flowers for me Alice?’

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Denise and Samantha had decided that in their ceremony they would meet in the foyer and then walk down the aisle together. As Denise entered from a side door she was suddenly engulfed with a vision of loveliness. Samantha was wearing her own designer dress, matching heels and with immaculate hair and makeup. The two dresses were of different designs but exactly complemented one another. There was a gasp of admiration from both the spectators and from the two brides as they caught sight of one another for the first time.

‘Sam you look absolutely beautiful,’ said Denise, squealing with delight. ‘I am so glad you decided to wear a dress.’

‘I think I would say the same about you,’ answered Samantha, blushing with pleasure.

‘The main thing is that they look wonderful as a pair,’ commented Jane

‘Helen, this looks like your doing,’ said Denise.

‘Perhaps, but with a little bit of help from Jane and Sue, she replied. ‘We could not let the opportunity of photographing our two best models together go to waste, now could we?’

The two brides walked down the aisle, arm in arm, to make their vows and exchange rings. They were followed by the two friends who had first brought them together, and a little girl with a basket to hold their flowers. However, there was no-one in the congregation more proud than Samantha’s father and Denise’s mother, as they stood next to one another in the front row.