A Summer of Changes

by Louise Anne Smithson

Book 3 Chapter 5

A revelation

Julia had telephoned her mother briefly during her journey home on Tuesday evening to give her the good news about her new job. She had then arranged to come round to her house after work the following evening to tell her all the details. Ellen Simons had therefore prepared a celebratory meal for her daughter on Wednesday, and the first half an hour or so of their discussion therefore covered her new responsibilities, how she had got on at the interview, and Julia’s plans to move to London when she was due to begin her job at the beginning of September.

‘Will you be able to stay with Denis again until you find your own flat?’ she asked.

‘I'm not sure about that. It may be possible for me to stay for a night or two,’ she answered. ‘He shares a flat with a colleague from his work and they don’t have a spare bedroom, so I’ll need to find somewhere to live for myself pretty quickly.’

‘By the way, how's Denis getting on in London, he's never very forthcoming to me when we speak on the telephone?’

This was the question Julia had been dreading and now she struggled to find the right words to answer.

‘He's, er, doing quite well, and seems to be very happy, but has found himself rather an unusual job for the summer,’ she said.

‘I thought he was still working for the same company that he joined when he went up to London. The one which supplies women’s fashions to shops,’ she replied.

‘Yes, he does still work for them, and is currently helping to prepare their new online catalogue,’ replied Julia.

‘So what does he have to do that is so unusual?’

Julia hesitated then answered.

‘He's temporarily working as a photographic model.’

Ellen laughed.

‘I know mother’s are usually biased, but even I can see that he is neither tall enough nor good looking enough to work as a model,’ she said in some surprise.

‘Perhaps not, as a male model, but he's actually modelling female clothing for them, and seems to be very good at it.’

Ellen didn’t seem to take in what was said, so Julia took the opportunity to hand over several recent photographs of Denise taken at work.

‘Here, please have a look at these,’ she said.

Ellen looked through several pictures in a state of shock.

‘Are you telling me that these are pictures of my son Denis?’ she said.

‘Yes Mum,’ said Julia.

After a few moments hesitation, she added, ‘but he asks that we should refer to him as “Denise” and as “she” or "her" when, er “she”'s dressed like that.’

Ellen looked utterly shocked, and didn't answer. Julia decided that she needed to say something more.

‘Denise looks pretty good as a model, doesn’t she?’

Ellen still didn't answer, but continued to scrutinize the pictures.

‘I have to say that she was really kind and thoughtful to me when I was in London,’ continued Julia.

‘How long have you known about this?’ asked Ellen sharply.

‘I only discovered myself on Sunday afternoon, when I arrived in London. To begin with it came as quite a shock to me as well, but I've gradually got used to the idea,’ said Julia.

‘So how long has this been going on?’ she asked.

‘Only a few weeks, but she's recently been asked by them to work as a model until mid-September.’

‘How on earth did he get involved in this - modelling?’ she asked with a note of distaste.

‘I understand that Denis agreed to dress as a girl for one evening in May so that he could attend the hen night of one of his colleagues. He must have impressed his colleagues because a few days later, Denise was asked to fill in at short notice for her bridesmaid who'd broken her leg.’

As she said this she handed over some more photographs; this time of her erstwhile brother dressed as a bridesmaid.

‘But these are incredible,’ continued Ellen, still quite stunned. ‘However did he acquire the long hair, and what about those breasts?’ she said pointing to a close up portrait of Denise in her bridesmaid’s dress.’

‘She's wearing hair extensions and silicone breast forms in that picture, both of which are very convincing. She also has nail extensions that also look just like the real thing.’

‘It must take him ages to get himself ready for work each morning,’ commented Ellen.

Julia blushed.

‘No longer than it takes Samantha, the other model they're employing for the job. Her hair, breasts and the finger-nails remain in place after work each evening and at weekends.’

‘But how does he manage when he's not working?’

‘Mum, you must realise that Denise is currently living as a woman full-time. In fact it was one of the conditions of her sharing a flat with Samantha. I didn't meet Denis whilst I was in London.’

Ellen stared at the pictures.

‘He has pierced his ears as well.’

‘Yes, I know, she's had a second set of piercings since this picture was taken.’

‘And where did all these clothes come from?’

‘I understand she was given quite a number of women’s clothes by a girl friend who was emigrating to Singapore, and others have been provided by her work. I think she may have bought some of her own as well.’

Ellen took in a sharp intake of breath.

‘Julia, I wish you would stop referring to your brother as if he were a woman. I don’t know what he thinks he is doing, but I'm certainly not going to condone it, and will tell him so when I see him,’ she said fretfully.

‘My so-called brother now looks, sounds and even acts like an attractive young woman, and she seems to be very happy with her new life,’ replied Julia in a determined voice.

Ellen didn't reply, but continued looking through the photos absently. A tear started to run down her cheek. Julia placed her hand on her mother’s arm to stop her from flicking through the pictures.

‘Mum, like you I was shocked at first, but she's now an adult and has the right to choose how she spends her life. As I said, Denise has been very kind to me over the last few days and it has been good to discover that I now have a sister living in London. I hope she 'll remain as Denise for as long as she wishes to do so. In the meanwhile, the least I can do is to address her as she chooses,’ said Julia in a gentle yet determined voice.

Ellen’s anger subsided, and she started to cry.

‘Does that mean I've lost my son?’

‘I don’t really know Mum,’ said Julia embracing her mother. ‘Perhaps you have, but if so, then you've also gained a lovely younger daughter, if you choose to accept her as such.’

‘Julia, this has been such a shock to me, I don’t know what I should do. Should I speak to her on the telephone?’

‘No. You'll need a little time to digest the news, and then I'd suggest that you should meet Denise in the flesh and judge her for yourself,’ said Julia. ‘I know that she's also anxious to see you and would be willing to come up to Norwich this coming weekend, if you're willing to see her, but please don’t expect her to change back into Denis for the visit or whilst she's here.’

‘I don’t know. Whatever will the neighbours say if they see my son arriving at my house dressed like that?’ she said pointing to one photograph of Denise looking quite glamorous in an evening dress.

‘Mum, the photographs that I've shown you are either specially posed shots, or else were taken at a wedding. Most of the time my sister looks and dresses just like a normal and attractive young woman. I doubt if your neighbours would even recognise her as Denis, and even if they did do — so what?’

‘It's all very well for you to say that but I'll have to live here among them after you've both gone to London.’

‘Mum, if you're really so worried about what they think then she can always stay with me in my flat at Sprowston and we'll meet you somewhere on neutral territory,’ said Julia.

‘I'm not sure how I am going to react when we meet. I won't even know how to address him or her. I would be bound to get upset,’ said Ellenor.

‘If you like I'll be there as well when you meet her, to give you some moral support. However, please don’t expect me to take your side if you start to make unreasonable demands. If she comes to Norwich it will be as your daughter, Denise, and not as your son, Denis. You must accept that, or else it'll be better that she doesn't come,’ said Julia.

Her mother paused in thought for a while.

‘Alright, maybe we can meet somewhere in Norwich and take it from there.’

‘I've promised to telephone her later to tell her how I got on when I spoke to you this evening. I'll suggest to her that she comes up to Norwich after work on Friday evening.’

---

Denise was not surprised, although inevitably a little disappointed to hear of her mother’s initial reaction to the news, when she spoke to Julia later on Wednesday night.

‘Do you think I should come home on Friday evening?’ she asked.

‘Yes, I think so, but I'm afraid you'll have to stay with me rather than with mum,’ replied Julia apologetically.

‘Oh!’ said Denise, and the disappointment in her voice was apparent from that one syllable.

Her mother didn't want her to come to her house, although she'd plenty of spare room, one of which still contained some of Denis’s belongings. Instead, she'd have to sleep on Julia’s couch.

‘Look, Denise, Mum was bound to be a little shocked by the news, but at least she has agreed to meet you,’ said Julia. ‘Once she gets to know you as a lovely young woman, she'll soon come round to accepting the idea.’

‘I hope you're right,’ she answered without enthusiasm.

‘Just give her a little time to get used to the idea, and don’t try to rush things.’

‘Alright Julia, I'll try. Thank you for acting as the go-between, it can't have been easy for you.’

‘That's alright, and I promise to help you both as much as I can this coming weekend’.

‘I’ll talk to you later when I know what time I’ll be arriving.’

Denise finished the call and felt a tear welling up in her eye. Samantha had been in the same room reading a novel when her friend had taken the call.

‘Is there anything I can do to help?’ she asked when she saw her friend was in distress.

‘Will you hold me please?’ asked Denise.

Samantha hesitated for a second, but then got out of her chair and gave her friend an affectionate hug. Denise began to cry, for the first time since she was a child.

‘Whatever is the matter, Denise?’, asked Samantha.

‘Samantha, I'm so confused about everything. I've had such a mixture of emotions these last few weeks that I don’t know whether I'm happy or sad. At least my mother knows now, but I'm so anxious about visiting Norwich this weekend.’

‘In that case, don’t go, if it's just going to upset you in this way.’

‘No, I have to go and face her. She's my mother, and I don’t want to be a disappointment to her.’

‘Yes, I suppose that now that she knows you'll have to meet her face to face.’

Denise nodded, but didn't say anything.

‘I've promised to visit my Dad this weekend, otherwise I'd offer to go with you and hold your hand,’ said Samantha, still hugging her friend.

Denise smiled through her tears.

‘No, it's all right. Julia will be there to offer me moral support.’

‘I'm glad. I liked your sister and I feel that she would be good to have as an ally.’

‘Yes, I suppose so.’

‘One of the authors we've been studying at University, Dame Julian, came from Norwich. She wrote about the importance of the role of mothers and their love. She also wrote some famous words which seem to apply to your situation,’ said Samantha, continuing to hold her friend.

‘What are they?’ asked Denise, now drying her eyes with a tissue.

‘All shall be well, and all manner of things shall be well.’

‘I just hope she was right,’ said Denise.

‘Of course she was.’

---

The following day was Sarah’s birthday at work and Helen had brought in a cream cake and was planning an afternoon tea. Denise used the opportunity to buy her a small gift to thank her for her help over the last few weeks. The modelling work passed without untoward incident but her colleagues did notice that Denise appeared to be more pre-occupied and less cheerful than normal and guessed that it related to her mother. Once her colleagues were having tea, and after they had all congratulated Sarah, Sue encouraged Denise to relate the story of her sister’s arrival, her interview and her mother’s subsequent reaction to them all. Her colleagues listened and offered their sympathy and reassurance.

‘So what are your plans for the weekend?’ asked Sarah.

‘I hope to leave for Norwich as soon as we've finished work tomorrow and catch the 6.30 pm train from Liverpool Street.

‘Where will you be staying?’ asked Jane.

‘My sister has offered to let me stay in her bedsit because my mother is worried about what the neighbours might think if I turn up wearing a dress!’

‘But you will be meeting her?’ asked Helen.

‘Yes, Julia has arranged that she and my mother will meet me off the train at 8.30 pm and then we'll collect a take-away meal in the city centre and take it back to Julia’s bed-sit in Sprowston.’

‘Then what?’

‘I'll have to play it by ear and decide whether to return to London on Saturday morning or else stay for the whole weekend.’

‘Good luck. By the way what are you planning to wear?’ asked Jane.

‘I'm not sure. I don’t want to wear anything too girly that will get crumpled on the journey, but I don’t want to go looking like Denis either.’

‘You would have difficulty looking like Denis these days even if you wanted too,’ responded Sue. ‘But you do want to make a point and give a good first impression to your mother. Whatever you do, don’t wear trousers over the weekend.’

‘I have a stretch sateen panelled skirt and matching jacket in turquoise, which always looks good, even after a long train journey,’ said Jane, ‘you'd be welcome to borrow that if you like.’

‘OK thanks, but what would I wear with it?’ she asked.

‘How about that white bustier with the back zip and white buckle belt that your friend gave to you?’ suggested Samantha. ‘You could also wear your matching pair of high-heeled shoes and shoulder bag.’

‘Alright then, if you think they'll be ok’.

The group continued by planning her wardrobe for the entire weekend which at least took her mind off the forthcoming meeting with her mother for a while.

---

After work that day, Sue took pity on her young friend and invited her two models home for a meal, as Alison was planning to spend the evening at home as well. Denise therefore found herself repeating the story of the previous few days once again. However, Alison was an ideal antidote for anyone feeling depressed. She was a natural actress, and did a hilarious send-up of the meeting between Denise and her sister the previous weekend, which Denise took in good part and joined in. This was followed by an equally funny account by Samantha of her attempts to avoid the attentions of an ardent young man during her first year at university. Laughter is infectious and it did not take too long before the four of them were contributing funny stories and generally having a good time. Thus, by the time she and Samantha made their way back to Shepherd’s Bush, Denise was feeling much happier and more reconciled to dealing with whatever situation might arise over the coming weekend.