Today, sitting in a group of (Sunday) people numbering about 50 people, both male and female, and seeing the obvious genetic variations, it came to me. We Are The Aliens !!! Said group of people have made a lot of money pushing Genetic testing to the tune of around $150 per person. Other people, purportedly expert scientists, say they have spent years digging through ancient ruins.
It seems obvious to me that "we" are the Aliens. Pardon my repetition.
Depending on what will happen in the USA in the next 120 days, how safe will those of our ilk be here in America. I briefly looked into fleeing to Israel, but that is not practical for me, and perhaps not safe. I was considering Tel Aviv. I was just looking at going to western or central Canada, but that just seems impractical to me.
So, perhaps it is best to just say where I am and hope for the best.
I'm disgustingly old, 77 1/2, and while there have not been any diagnoses of Dementia or Alzheimer's, I'm tired, so tired. The Doctors such as they are think I have MS. For now, I plan to keep writing as a relief to my severe Depression, I do not plan to publish any more whether under Ahabidah, or Gwen Brown. I'm hoping that I die in my sleep rather than rot away in a care center. I was going to leave my email but that will expose me to scammers, so perhaps I'll just check the site for PMs, if there are any. Should anyone want to, I am sure the Admins can contact me.
"Dust" is a maker of internet short videos. I got curious about them, who they are, where they are, how they function and all that. I did not find out if they use sources outside their group, or if they pay them. It's just an idea but perhaps some of the better writers on BCTS could submit their work to Dust, you know, take a flyer. They might even be interested in TG content. I see a lot of TG content on YouTube nowadays.
2:00 AM PDT my time. Just finished watching outsider Russian movie called "Attraction". It is about 2 hours long and in my opinion very good. It is worth your time. It came out before the Ukraine/Putin war. It makes me realize that there are things that are more important than gender.
The English dubbing is flawless, though a bit stilted.
There is a site that is new to me on YouTube called "The Bender Of Gender". So far, the first entry looks to be some four hours long. It is all voice and perhaps a Cross Dressers dream. I'm into it about ten minutes, and have it paused to make this blog. It remains to be seen if I will be able to keep getting into it for the whole four hours.
It was still about 95 Degrees F (35 c) at 1:00 am this morning and though my apartment was 76 F or so, I woke up with cabin fever and stepped outside to get away from the noise of the chiller. As I sat there, I could hear a woman on the street screaming hysterically. She sounded close enough that I decided to see if calling the Police was in order. She was actually about 2 blocks away, so walking as fast as I could it took less than 5 minutes to get to her.
Next year will be 20 years since I came out, 18 years since I had mtf surgery. Now I have questions. You old timers know who I am, and the problem logging in with my old user name. (Gwen Brown)
Just looking at the reception for "Andromeda Smith". I've been Beavering away and so far, have the beginning of 5 chapters. If the reception does not get warmer, I won't bother with further posting.
I've had enough of my complaining off topic about the sins of Micro Soft and the billionaires who victimize us.
After pecking away in MS Word today at "Andromeda Smith" I was feeling doubtful that it was any good, and started to read it out loud to myself, then found out that the software will do it for you. So, after I sat there and listened to the less than 1000 words, any flaws just jumped out at me. The AI that does this is rather limited in places so I don't know how I can get it to interpret stretched out pauses, that I would normally write as ...
I can't say what has happened to the Internet. I thought it was only in the last two weeks, but it may have been actually going on for much longer. ONE person has actually reached out to me, offering help and I gave them all my contact information.
It's been nearly 20 years, and along the way several people have asked for help, and I have done my best to respond. I've tried very hard to be responsive to the site administrators. The record is there, if they kept any.
Sadly, every interaction I have recently had with those on BCTS and elsewhere shows that most or all of those who use any sort of computer technology are simply unaware of the shake out we have recently experienced. It has been a huge education for me. Some of those I have talked to have been quite blunt and tactless, treating me like I am an idiot.
It is profound to me that some are just busy about being who they are no matter what the self-proclaimed experts say. We all know them, and it is not about gender, though sometimes it is. They are just born that way. Some born leaders, some are followers, some are healers and others are warriors. Some have a high need for order knit right into their souls, so are police whether there is a badge or not. Some tear clocks apart all their lives. There are those here who are Wordsmiths and others want to be...
For almost a week, the Internet has been unavailable to me, no email, or online purchases. I don't know if my old win 10 computer died or if I got hacked or what? Eventually, I gave up on it because I knew that by August Win 10 was not going to be supported anyway.
Sorry this is not TG related, though some of those I deal with are...
Lame excuse I know.
I started out wanting to stream "Greyhound" with Tom Hanks online. I've only watched it 6 times. As it turns out, Apple isn't dealing because they are busily shooting themselves in the feet. I tried Amazon Prime, and a half dozen other sites, and no joy.
I started reading "Your Wings Are Beautiful" by Kalista and found it went 4 chapters and no more. :( The protagonist did not get wings, and did not get out of the Castle. Not sure if this was a gender change story.
In my subsequent research, the author revealed that by day, they were a bike delivery person by day, and an aspiring actor at night.
Having suspected this for some time, Today an actor I recognized rode the elevator with me in my apartment building. The building is by no means upscale at all. He was friendly and showed no signs of the purported arrogance or reclusiveness . No, I am not identifying them or where I live.
It is finally clear that stories by Gwen Brown, Ahabidah and any other pseudonym I have used, do not get read, Kudo, or Commented on. It is senseless to ask you to pull my stories. Not angry, just finally facing reality.
As a writer hoping for that big break, one of the characters in my stories is often what I wish to be. Less often, I will dress up like a cos-play character while writing but less often venture out in public. I have my own collection of role playing clothing. For me, cross dressing would mean wearing pants, perhaps cowboy boots and grumbling in as deep a voice as I can manage. I'd have to call myself Ahab.
Do real authors do such antics when composing their stories. I wonder.
I was very much surprised to find some of the works of my childhood, on Kindle. Right now I am reading Dragon Riders of Pern, and enjoying it greatly. I haven't re-sampled Andre Norton yet, but assuming I don't encounter my mortality, plan to. Quite fun.
I was talking to another post op MtF woman the other day, and her experience was the same as mine. They did the surgery, let me convalesce for several days and then wanted another $3000 to finish the job. I had no more money, so came home with no Labial lips. The woman I talked to did the same thing. I don't want to reveal the name of the surgeon here, but I will if you PM me.
I've been working on some very large stories but am quite frustrated with Windows 10 file management protocol. It feels like they do sinister, and sneaky things with file preferences; seeming to try to put things on their "sky drive", which to me means out in the public. I do not trust them. I "think" that I now understand enough about what to look for each time I save a file, but there is always the feeling that some sneaky geek will change things and I will miss that.
It is confusing that such a high percentage of the stories here, and in new movies, and in video games seem to glorify war. Having seen a great deal of violence, these days I eschew any exposure to it. Having explored the works of many authors here, many of the earlier authors wrote sweet, winsome stories, but these days it all seems to be about killing one another.
Checks can be made out & sent to:
Joyce Melton
1001 Third St.
Space 80
Calimesa, CA 92320
USA
Note: $6000 is the operating, maintenance and upgrade budget. Amounts received in excess of the $6000 will be applied to long term debt accrued over the last 19 years.
