Desperate to prove himself and track down his mentor, Chris embarks on his new career as a superheroine and makes some new allies. But when he picks a fight above his power level in order to make a name for himself, his embarrassment over being a girl may soon be the least of his worries!

By Jenny North
Artwork by Fraylim and Splutt

The next day after the big fight with the Animancers I arrived home just in time for dinner. I was moving a little delicately since I was still feeling my hidden bruises, and as I tossed my backpack down by the front door I massaged the aching bicep that a hellwolf had tried to use as a chew toy.

"Hey, kiddo," my mom said. "Did you have fun playing Ultimate Frisbee?"

I looked at her in bewilderment before I remembered that had been my cover story for my sudden rash of absences after school while I was out doing my superheroics. I couldn't suggest an actual sports team for fear of it getting around that I wasn't attending, and at Caleb's insistence I opted not to choose something geeky like Chess Club or Model United Nations since my parents might find ways to quiz me on it. It needed to be something they wouldn't want to attend and would ideally explain the occasional injury, so I invented Faraday Midtown High School's Ultimate Club. Caleb and I worked out all sorts of details like team names and rivalries in case they asked, but frankly, Mom and Dad were just happy I was getting out of the house.

"It's just called Ultimate, Mom," I said.

My Dad clapped me on the shoulder as he walked past, causing me to wince in pain. "Hey, you can't make the highlights if you don't dive for 'em, right, son?" Then, noticing my reaction, he said, "You all right?"

I gave a wan smile and nodded. "This guy just plowed right into me. It was like getting hit with a truck."

"Well, as long as you're enjoying yourself."

As I carried the salad bowl to the table, I smiled. "Yeah. I think so. My team argues all the time but the work is challenging and actually kind of fun. I feel like I'm really making a difference in people's lives."

My parents both looked at me strangely.

"I—I mean, I'm making a difference by helping the team. Not like making a difference in the world, or anything. I mean, it's just Frisbee," I said with a nervous snort.

I hated lying to them and not just because I was obviously pretty terrible at it. I sometimes wondered if they might understand, but the circumstances kinda worked against me and somehow I didn't think they'd take to the idea that their teenage son was out fighting crime as a superheroine known as Prodigious Girl.

I figured it best to change the subject. "You're home early," I said as I cast a glance over at my dad. He was an Assistant District Attorney for Faraday City, a job which often demanded long hours. The weed of crime might bear bitter fruit, but it still grew like...well, a weed.

"Yeah, I had a good day today. We won that case against Sojourner. He'll be going away for a long time."

I took a sudden interest in my plate as I served myself. "I thought Sojourner was one of the good guys?"

"Chris, I know you're fascinated with those supers, but believe me, he was nothing of the sort. Vigilantes who work outside the system are as much a danger to the people of this city as any of those so-called supervillains."

I nudged the food around on my plate. "They don't all work outside the system. Some are registered and work with the police."

He shook his head. "That's one skimpy fig leaf," he muttered. "They run around and indiscriminately get into fights...they all need to be held accountable."

"Amen to that," my mom said. "But it keeps you busy putting them away," she said with a little smile.

Yeah, I hated lying to my parents. But I didn't see that changing anytime soon.

"Oh, and speaking of rogue figures in capes, you need to pick up your room, young man," my mom said. "I could hardly get to your laundry basket for all of the toys in the way."

I almost dropped my silverware in shock. "Mom! They're not toys. They're metahuman collectibles and memorabilia."

"Uh huh." She shared a glance with my dad.

I looked between them. "Some of those could be really valuable!" I insisted.

"Like the comic books?" my dad said as he reached for the salad dressing.

"Yes," I contended, though I noticed he seemed to pick up on the uncertainty in my voice. "Some of those collectibles might end up in a museum one day," I added haughtily. "History will be my judge."

He made a small grumble. "Mmm. Well, I'm sure the Smithsonian will appreciate how we're storing these valuable artifacts for them in the meantime."

My mom raised an eyebrow as she looked at me. "And until history rolls around, I'll be your judge. Clean up your room, or I'll do it for you. And I won't guarantee all these priceless relics will survive the purge."

After dinner I trudged upstairs, a bit put out that I, a selfless hero of the city, was being relegated to tidy up his room. I sniffed indignantly as I wondered if any of the other heroes were treated like this. Then I threw open the door and stepped inside.

Or rather I tried to, as the door shoved up against something. I squeaked inside and stepped carefully to avoid treading on the floorplans for the original Starfall Headquarters that were spread across the carpet or the news clippings of Brainchild's rescue at the science museum.

I stood and stared at the cluttered room. "Ugh. Okay, this is pretty bad," I admitted. Between my time as Prodigious Girl and trying to keep up with my homework, I'd definitely let things slide. I dug in and started to clean up.

But almost immediately I nearly gave myself a heart attack when I noticed that I'd left my I-Comm and CosFit devices sitting out in plain view on my desk! I'd been trying to link my I-Comm with my phone so I could get text alerts and I guess I'd forgotten them. It was a stupid mistake not just because I needed those as Prodigious Girl, but if my mom had noticed them there's a fair chance she might have recognized them for what they were and my goose would have been cooked. I guess she just overlooked them in the rest of the clutter.

"Security through obscurity," I muttered to myself as I tucked the items into my backpack.

An hour later, it looked a lot better. For a minute it almost looked like the life-size poster of Promethean over my bed was smiling down in satisfaction, as though he was reminding me that a hero doesn't let slide on things like cleanliness or personal hygiene.

I sighed. "Yeah, well, just the same, I think we can score one for messiness this time," I said to the poster.

With that taken care of, I decided to get a video chat going with Caleb. He'd been doing some research for me about how I might find Prodigy or at least get him a message. Caleb was a whiz at that kind of stuff, and he could rattle off facts and figures about superheroes like other guys might rattle off baseball statistics. So while I was getting nervous since time was running out on my provisional status and I had yet to even lay eyes on my so-called mentor, I knew I had nothing to fear as long as my man Caleb was on the case.

"You're boned," he said flatly as he stared at me from the video screen.

I lowered my voice to make sure my parents couldn't hear. "Dude, I have to find him! My provisional status as a sidekick runs out in less than two weeks, and I haven't even introduced myself to him! Don't you think Prodigy's going to think it's weird I've gone on all this time introducing myself as 'Prodigious Girl' and he doesn't even know me?"

"Well, in your defense you're pretty prodigious in your own right."

"Hilarious. C'mon, tell me you've got something?"

He held up a pile of papers. "I've been looking! I'm on HeroSpotter, SuperTracker, MetaSeeker and a bunch of other sites I don't even remember. Heck, I even tried some of the villain trackers like ScoundrelFinder and GoNaughty," he said. Then he furrowed his brow. "Though I'm starting to think that last one might be for something else."

"Caleb..."

"Dude, I'm telling you, the guy's a freaking ghost."

I stopped short. "You don't think—?"

"No, he's not dead, I'm pretty sure of that." He cocked a grin. "That'd be pretty funny, though, wouldn't it? You, running around as a girl in a leotard for the last few months only to find out it was all for nothing?"

"It's not a leotard," I grumbled as I rubbed my eyes. "Why don't you think he's dead?"

Caleb tapped on the keyboard as he checked something. "It looks like there might have been a couple possible sightings down south of the city in the old tenements at night. Maybe do some patrols through there? Or find some way to get him to notice you."

"Great. Any suggestions?"

He thought for a moment. "I guess you could always raise your skirt a couple more inches."

I gave him a pained smile and nodded.

"Have you given any more thought to how you're going to maintain your secret ID at school?"

"I've got the greatest cover in the world by not being a girl," I shot back, but I knew what he meant. The rise in teenage heroes meant that teens were constantly on the lookout for little clues that a young hero might be hiding in their midst and quickly noticed little clues like a garish piece of jewelry emblazoned with a magic rune or the flash of a bright primary color fabric poking out of one's trousers. Nobody was immune. Even a math club geek could potentially be a young master inventor in disguise, and more than one kid had gotten pantsed for wearing colored underwear that looked a little too suspicious. Poor Marta Randini had practically been assaulted by overeager hero-worshippers when she wore a long-sleeved shirt and pants during a particularly hot autumn day, although her would-be hero worshippers backed off quickly when it turned out she wasn't covering up colorful tights, just an embarrassing skin rash.

So basically, the dawn of the age of heroes had invented a brand new way for teenagers to be even more hyper-aware and critical of each other, and Dr. Reginald Faraday, genius inventor and creator of the supers, had discovered a way to make my teenage life even more tense and awkward than acne had. And now that I was a superhero myself, I had to learn to cover my tracks.

"Don't worry, I've got just the thing," I told Caleb confidently.

As you may have surmised, I did not have 'just the thing,' unless the thing in question was a brain aneurysm that caused temporary insanity. As Prodigious Girl I'd basically been swimming in estrogen during most of my free time and largely hanging out with other teenage heroines who were in the midst of their own battles against the implacable forces of puberty. So by the time I changed back to Chris, I was seriously ready to do whatever stereotypically masculine things I could.

Sadly, being a geek, I didn't really know what those things might entail apart from scratching myself and spitting. Sports were out since there was too much risk I'd accidentally reveal my powers. And there was no way could I break in with the cool kids. Worse, part of my problem was that I couldn't afford a girlfriend nosing around in my life—or even just a female friend, for that matter—so my brilliant scheme led me to the tried-and-true method guaranteed to reinforce my masculinity without running the risk of a girlfriend: to dress like a douchebag and hit on girls with lame pickup lines.

If they ever make a movie out of my life—which at this point I feel safe in assuming will be a comedy—I would like to suggest to the future director that this would be the appropriate time for a montage set to the tune of "Macho Man" by the Village People, wherein the luckless schmuck playing me is seen running around looking like a geek who tries to act like a testosterone-riddled jerk and gets agonizingly shut down by every girl in school. I would further submit that the "hey, hey, hey, hey" chorus would be a great place for a series of quick cuts of said schmuck (i.e. me) getting slapped on the face by various girls. (In fact, nobody actually slapped me—my shutdowns were far more gut-wrenchingly pathetic—but a little cinematic license never hurt.)

And so, I soon found myself walking down the school hallway as I rubbed my cheek where Jackie Gavin had slapped me. (Again, she didn't, and even if she had it wouldn't have hurt my invulnerable skin, but just go with me here...I'm establishing a scene.)

Caleb walked up alongside me and gave me a pained look. "I think you should know that I'm finding it harder to look up to you," he said. "And this is coming from somebody who's okay with you wearing a bra in your free time."

I pulled a mirror out of my pocket to check my gelled-up hair. A girl I knew from History class walked by and I gave her a little wink, which she returned with a look somewhere between disbelief and revulsion.

"Hey, it's working, isn't it?" I told him. "It's just a cover. And besides, I'm kinda liking gettin' to act like a guy for a change." I reached down to adjust my crotch in my faux leather pants.

"Don't you think you're overdoing it a little?"

"I gotta project an image," I said as I stroked my chin. I hadn't shaved in three days and I could feel the little stubble that would one day form a pretty righteous goatee.

"Yeah, well, I'm not really comfortable with it," Caleb said. "I mean, it's one thing for everyone to think you're gay, but now they're starting to look at me like—"

"WHAT?!?"

"Well, that's what you were going for, right? A closeted gay guy?"

"Oh, my God! Why would you think that?"

He scoffed. "Well, c'mon, you dress like you're going to a leather bar and then you brag about girls and hit on them but never make good." I was stunned and didn't say anything but to my horror, he continued. "And it's not just me. People are talking. One guy even asked me if you were seeing anybody, but I told him I didn't think you'd be interested. You're not, right?"

"Of course not!"

He held up his hands in surrender. "Hey, given the things I've seen you do, I didn't want to jump to conclusions. I'm not judging."

We started walking to our next class and I suddenly began to feel extremely self-conscious about all the looks I was getting. I wondered if I could find a way to duck out at lunch discreetly to fly home and change.

"Besides, even if they did think you were gay, It's pretty insulting to assume we're a couple just because we hang out together," he said. "That's just jumping to conclusions."

"Caleb, please stop talking."

"Plus, why do you get to be the butch one? What's that make me?"

"You're still talking, Caleb."

"I'm just saying it's not fair. You run around in a miniskirt and still you get to be the butch one?"

"Well, I can lift a car over my head."

He considered that. "Yeah, okay, that's a good point," he conceded.

* * * * *

The next day I cut out of lunch at school to run a patrol over the city, which was really just a flimsy excuse to clear my head given how tired I was feeling. I'd been sneaking out for a week out to check the tenements where Prodigy might have been spotted and I didn't have anything to show for my time except for preventing one drunk guy from getting mugged. A drunk guy who wanted to express his gratitude in ways that would have made my skin crawl if I'd been a real girl.

Oh, who am I kidding? It did make my skin crawl. Ugh.

As I flew amongst the skyscrapers downtown, I yawned again as I felt the wind in my hair and beheld the city sprawled out beneath me. But just as I was about to glance away I caught a fleeting glimpse of something perched on the ledge of one of the tall buildings. I swung back around and saw a man leaned over with his feet dangling over the edge of the roof, seemingly on the verge of jumping! As I flew up behind him I got a better look at him—a pudgy and balding middle-aged guy in a shirt and tie—but I had no idea what to do. My experience as a hero mostly involved punching things so I wasn't quite sure what to do with a possible suicide attempt. I tentatively landed quietly behind him, noting that he hadn't seemed to notice me yet so I figured I should announce myself and at least get him talking.

"Um, don't jump?" I said tentatively.

"AAAHHH!!" he yelled out in shock, nearly falling off the ledge.

"Oh, God, hang on!" I cried as I leapt forward to catch him before he fell. But as I reached him I realized that he wasn't nearly as off-balance as he seemed, and when I saw his face he was grinning at me from ear to ear.

"Sorry," he laughed, "I couldn't resist. Man, you should have seen the look on your face." As I looked down on the ledge next to him I saw a paper lunch bag and a half-eaten sandwich.

"That wasn't funny," I chastised him in as officious a tone as I could muster. "You could have died."

"You can fly, right? You could have caught me."

"Well...yes," I admitted. "But that's not the point," I maintained, now less certain what my point was. "You probably shouldn't even be up here."

"It's fine, I come up here all the time. Trust me, the guy who owns the place doesn't mind."

"How do you—" I stopped mid-sentence as I looked him in the face. "Oh, my God, you're Marty Maddox."

"Guilty," he said as he motioned at the ledge for me to sit down. I did so and scarcely took my eyes off of him as he picked up his sandwich and took a bite. Marty Maddox was a legend in the superhero community. He didn't have any powers or special abilities, but when the Liberty Squadron formed when he was still a teenager, he became their unofficial "mascot," and often accompanied them on their adventures. Back then there was hardly a kid alive who didn't dream of swapping places with him. Sure, getting superpowers yourself was Plan A, but failing that, just getting to hang out with the supers all the time? That was in "pinch me, I'm dreaming," nerdgasm territory.

Of course now, more than thirty years later, Marty had given up adventuring and owned AGON Technologies, a company that provided technology and support to the heroes of the city. From his round face and pot belly it looked like he'd given up exercising as well, but he had a mischievous gleam in his eye as he looked over at me.

I realized that I'd been staring, so I blinked and flashed a smile as I tried to sound casual. "You, uh, come up here often?"

"Mmm hmm. Great view of the city, and it still geeks me out to see the heroes flying by. Sometimes I get a view when a fight breaks out, too. You remember that rumpus with Golgotha and the Gamma Kaiju? Best seat in the city, right here." He reached into his lunch bag. "Hey, I've got an extra sandwich in here. You hungry?"

"Oh, uh, thanks, no, I should be going," I said.

He nodded. "I get it. City in danger, people to save, right?"

"Right."

"Well, you fly safe, miss. Keep fighting the good fight!"

"Thanks," I said quietly as I stared at his earnest smile.

Thirty minutes later I was sitting next to him as I polished off the last of a juice box while I tried to figure out a discreet way to brush away the sandwich crumbs that had fallen into my cleavage. (Yet another new occupational hazard that I had never envisioned in my career as a superhero.)

"You were like the original sidekick!" I gushed. "I—I mean—"

"No, it's okay," he said. "You're right, I was. I was never going to be a hero like those guys. I was just lucky to be there. And it was insane I was there in the first place, a teenager running around in those situations? Like you—how old are you? 20? 22?"

"I'm sixteen."

He did a double take but to my surprise at least his eyes didn't cut down to ogle my chest. It was kind of refreshing.

"Yikes, what are they feeding you kids these days?" he said.

Well, somewhat refreshing.

"Yeah, I get that a lot," I sighed as I looked down and tucked my hair back, feeling self-conscious. "So, uh, why didn't you ever become a hero?"

He shook his head. "Ah, I tried it once but it just wasn't me. I guess I could have done it, but stuffing my flabby ass into a suit of powered armor wouldn't change who I am. I guess some people are just born to be sidekicks."

I thought that was the saddest thing I'd ever heard in my life. We talked for a few minutes longer, but his words were still ringing in my ears long after we talked. Ever since I got my powers it had never even occurred to me that I might not become a hero. I viewed this deal with Prodigy as a temporary detour to become a sidekick and make a name for myself (both figuratively and literally if I could get him to bequeath it to me), but the thought of never being anything more than a sidekick? My mind reeled at the prospect. I mean, sure, Marty had done a lot for the city without being a superhero, but it seemed so disheartening.

I sighed. Of course at this point I wasn't even as good as a sidekick. I still needed to find my mentor and convince him I was worth the trouble. And then I had to find a discreet way to coax him into retirement so I could carry on in his name. I felt a little guilty about that, but at least I'd do the name proud. And as I looked down and discreetly brushed the last of the sandwich crumbs out of my cleavage, I was more than ready to give up this ridiculous body so I could become a real superhero.

* * * * *

The next day I got a signal from Quasarblaze who said that he had a line on "something huge" and that we were to meet him that night in the warehouse district downtown. I fed my folks a story about spending the night at Caleb's to study for a test—I don't think they bought it but they had no reason not to trust me—and made for the address. When I arrived, Blaze and Triggerhappy were already there...as well as Enchantrix and Bhramari.

Given their feelings about the guys I was surprised to see them there, but before I could say anything, Trixie pulled me aside and said, "I knew you'd come. I didn't want these idiots getting you killed."

"Thanks," I smiled.

Blaze explained that he'd gotten a tip from a "reliable source" that there was to be a break-in that night at one of these warehouses that were owned by Faraday Unlimited. We took position on a neighboring rooftop and stayed out of sight while Bhramari sent out insects to scout the buildings, leaving the rest of us to sit there on our stakeout, bored out of our minds.

"So, you are from England, then," I said to Trixie, trying to learn a little more about her.

"Of course. But I didn't get my powers from my parents. I'm the first one in my family to learn magic."

"How?"

"My parents were always very evasive about the whole thing but apparently it happened when I was very little. My father did some kind of service for these three supernatural beings—he's never been quite clear what—so to repay the debt they visited me when I was little and bestowed this magic upon me."

"Really," I said, fascinated. I'd followed all kinds of superheroes but I knew very little about the ones that used magic. "Were they the ones who trained you, too?"

"Mmm hmm," she nodded. "Of course my father's actions also brought us to the attention of another more wicked spellcaster. She put—I guess you'd call it a curse—on me and I had to go away with the three other beings in hiding."

"What, away from your parents? That's awful!"

"It was at first. I—"

We were interrupted by a loud snicker. I turned to look accusingly at Triggerhappy, who had been double-checking his equipment nearby and was now fighting to hide a smile.

"Hey, that's really sad!" I chided him.

"Uh huh," he chortled.

I turned back to Trixie thinking she might be put out with him, but she didn't seem angry. In fact, she was giving him an annoyed look, almost like she was—

My eyes narrowed. "That was Sleeping Beauty," I said.

"I also have a brilliant story about this time I had some very swank glass slippers if you want to hear it," she said with a smile.

"God, you are so gullible," Triggerhappy laughed.

I just sat there and made a face as I felt the blood rush to my cheeks in embarrassment. Now I did feel like a dumb bimbo. I was starting to figure I should just change my hair to blonde and get the whole package.

"Oh, I think it's sweet how PG is so trusting," Trixie teased.

Silence soon returned, and with it, boredom.

"We need theme songs," Triggerhappy said.

"Oh, Lord," I groaned.

"C'mon, it's a great idea! Just think!" He grinned again and started singing, "Prodigious Girl, Prodigious Girl, does whatever a—"

I grabbed him roughly by the arm. "I strongly advise against finishing that sentence."

Trixie turned to Quasarblaze, who had been typing away on a small electronic pad. "What are you writing, anyway?"

"It's an apology."

Trixie and I looked at each other in astonishment. "What, for real?" she said.

"Yeah, my publicist wanted me to look it over. Next time I'm on TV he wants me to make some insulting remark about the cops in this city to stir up some negative publicity. Then later I'll read this apology and say how everybody misunderstood what I meant in the first place. It'll boost my ratings."

"That's appalling."

"No, what's appalling is that when we make our score tonight that bug girl over there is going to get equal credit for the takedowns. Is this some kind of equal opportunity bullshit, bringing her along?"

"Jesus, Blaze!" I said.

"You asshole, she's sitting right there!" Trixie spat.

He looked at Mari and scoffed. "What? She's got her back to us. It's not like she can hear us, anyway." Just then, he cried out and swatted at his bare cheek that was visible under his visor, obviously having been stung by something. "Fuck, was that—"

We turned and saw that Mari's hand was raised, flipping him the bird again.

"How the hell did she—?"

"She's deaf, but she can see and hear through the insects she's communicating with, you dimwit."

Triggerhappy peered over at Mari. "Is that how her powers work?"

Trixie looked at me helplessly and shook her head. "Right, this is ridiculous, I'm out of here. Mari, you want a lift, or..." Her voice trailed off and I turned to see that Mari had her head tilted slightly, as though she was concentrating on something. She then snapped her fingers twice to get our attention.

"Finally. Showtime," Blaze said.

Mari soon led us through the maze of warehouses to the one where she had observed some suspicious activity going on. Sadly, our group wasn't the best at sneaking. Supposedly Blaze's super-ability involved having some kind of knack with machines which he used to fashion his powered armor, so he relied on the built-in rockets to fly, and neither TH nor Mari had any special movement powers. So, as I flew up and carried Blaze onto the rooftop, Trixie portaled the others.

"Shouldn't we be worried about tripping the alarm ourselves?" Trixie wondered, looking around the rooftop.

"They already disarmed it," Blaze said absently. I wasn't sure if that meant he had some special insight to actually know that, or if he just didn't want to be bothered with any more delays.

We crept over to the windows to look inside and saw as a bunch of guys ransacked the joint, presumably searching for something specific.

"See? I told you!" Blaze whispered. "C'mon, we jump 'em and they'll never see us coming!"

"That's a lot of guys," Trixie whispered. "And they are carrying some serious tech."

"Don't be such a girl!"

"Yeah? Don't be such a—"

"Quiet!" I hissed, looking at the group. I turned to Mari and signed for her to reconnoiter, and we watched as a few houseflies on the opposite side of the glass lined up and started to fly an organized search pattern. As she stared off into space, she began to sign what they were seeing.

"Six guys with blasters," Trixie said.

Blaze scoffed. "See? Easy! We jump in—"

Mari signed further.

"Three more guys with some kind of exo-armor."

"We can take 'em."

Mari hesitated and signed something else and turned to look at Trixie in concern. Trixie then signed something back, and the two of them got into some kind of debate. I followed about a quarter of the conversation, but what I understood I didn't like.

"What is it?" TH asked.

Trixie took a deep breath. "There's also two supervillains down there. It's Killdozer and Killbane."

The girls and I looked at each other apprehensively, but a slow smile spread on Blaze's face that was visible beneath the line of his opaque goggles. "How tough do they look?" he asked.

* * * * *

I feel like I should pause here just a moment to address a couple questions that usually arise. Namely, what was the big deal since we'd been fighting villains all along, and second, what's up with those god-awful names?

So, second question first. You may be wondering why the villains have such lame names, especially if—being lawless blackguards that they are—they would certainly thumb their noses at that damnable registration system. (And also law and order.) Well, here's a fun fact: villains have a registration system, too!

Being the anarchist types that they are it's a bit more decentralized and totally voluntary, but to understand why a lawbreaker would submit themselves to the same excruciating process that I did, you need a lesson from Dr. Malevolence.

No, not the guy who tried to sink Australia. The other one.

Yep, that's right...some noob villain thought he could build up his cred by naming himself after the world-conquering despot and just changing the "Doctor" to "Dr." and arguing that he wasn't stepping on the good Doctor's tentacles. (In his defense, this wayward soul did in fact have a doctorate in the liberal arts. To my knowledge, the curriculum vitae of the better-known world-threatening malefactor remains a mystery.)

PRO TIP: If you're going to steal someone's moniker, don't choose the name of an egomaniacal power-mad despot who commands his very own army of soulless enforcer demons. Or, better yet, do exactly that...it'll save us good guys the trouble of arresting you. I'll send flowers.

After the sad, predictable, and wildly brief career of Dr. Malevolence (PhD, Fine Arts) as well as a couple similar situations where a villain's namesake was unable to adequately articulate the linguistic nuance to the original (and more powerful) owner, the bad guys quickly decided that lawlessness didn't have to mean complete anarchy, and it might be smart to post the names of known villains so as to avoid any unnecessary infighting. Being voluntary, people were of course free to ignore the registry and use whatever name they wished, but "buyer beware."

As to the first question, yes, my teammates and I had indeed dispatched quite a few evildoers in our short careers. However, this father-and-son villain duo were both Class III power level, which as Sidekicks we were specifically forbidden from engaging without a Hero present. We might have bent the rules and taken on just one of them alone, but both together with a squad supporting them was fighting way above our power level.

Or so went the argument.

* * * * *

"Forget it," Trixie said to Blaze, turning to Mari as she frantically signed something. "I—yes. Yes, I know. I know!"

"What's she saying?" Triggerhappy asked.

I followed enough to get the gist of it. "She thinks we should fall back and call it in."

"Well, that's the lightweights heard from," Blaze said. "PG, you're up for this, right?"

Normally I'd have told him where to stuff it, but all I could think about was the clock that was fast running out on my Sidekick status. If we could take these guys out—or even just drive them off—that might be just the feather in my cap I needed for when I finally found Prodigy. I was torn.

I looked at Blaze and hoped that maybe he'd see reason and would back down to save me from having to make a decision. "It would be very difficult," I told him. "Not to mention very...uncomfortable."

"Difficult and uncomfortable, like you trying to sleep on your stomach?"

Right, this was the guy that I'd hoped would steer me away from foolhardy stupidity.

Trixie looked at my pensive face. "Peej, tell me you're not actually considering this."

"Trix, I need this. I haven't even laid eyes on Prodigy yet. If I don't get his attention soon, I either have to go vigilante or hang it up. I can't do that."

"Since when are those your only options?" she snapped. "You can come with Mari and me...I'll introduce you to our mentor, I'm sure she'd take you in..."

"I...can't. It's complicated." I turned to Blaze. "All right, I'm in. How are we doing this?"

Trixie ran her fingers along her scalp, burying her fingers in the long platinum blonde locks of her hair. "Are you insane?" she said. She looked at Mari, who was still sitting there shocked.

"We take 'em out a couple at a time," Blaze said. "We drop down, sweep the edge—"

"And get killed the second they hear you," Trixie said. "You are going to die. Dead. In the ground."

Triggerhappy sniggered. "Oh, no!" he declared dramatically as he threw his arms around me. "I don't want to die a virgin! Please, Prodigious Girl, help me!" he laughed.

I shoved him off of me. "Shut up!"

"You think getting killed is a joke?" Trixie said.

"Look, stay out of this," Blaze said. "You made your de—"

"Fine, I'm in. Whatever," she said testily.

"Trixie—" I said.

"Shut up. You're an idiot. I'm saving you just like I'd save some moron that walks out into traffic. I'm in." Then Bhramari stepped forward. "We're both in," she amended.

"I was just kidding, I'm not really a virgin," TH said.

"Fine," Blaze said. "So, like I said, we sweep—"

"Wait, Trixie's right," I said. "We can't just go in shooting or we'll bring the whole place down on us." I thought for a second. "Trix, can you portal someone to us?"

"I think so. Maybe out to about a hundred feet or so? But I have to see them, and I can't see around all those boxes. But if you fly me above them, they'll spot us for sure."

I nodded. "You once portaled me from around a corner."

"Yeah, but I kinda magically 'tagged' you first. I could do that with one of us, but then the person I tag would have to go up and grab the guys. Then I could bring you both back. But none of us is that stealthy. They'd see us coming from a mile away."

"Okay, so we're back to my plan," Blaze said. "We go in—"

"Just wait a second," I insisted, looking at Trixie again. "Just how small a 'someone' could you tag to portal back?"

Her brow furrowed. "I don't—" Then, she followed my gaze as I looked at Bhramari. "Oh, that's good," she said, smiling.

We sneaked down into the warehouse and set up shop in one of the corner offices in the hope that it was far enough out of the way to not draw too much attention. As I shoved the furniture out of the way to make a target zone, TH prepared some tangle grenades and Mari sent one of her little insect helpers out to find our first victim. Trixie had magically "tagged" the little guy and was waiting for Mari's signal to open the portal to bring him back to us...along with whatever unfortunate soul he happened to have landed on.

We were all silent and tense as we watched Mari's face. Then, she nodded and the next thing we knew Trixie opened a portal into the target area and standing there in front of us was one of the mercenaries with a priceless "what the fuck" look on his face. TH's tangle grenade went off, I grabbed him, and Blaze and TH blasted him into unconsciousness.

"Okay, this one is going in the playbook," Triggerhappy said.

"Only if we can call it the 'peekaboo' maneuver," I grinned as I tossed the guy's unconscious body on the sofa to clear the area for our next victim.

We quickly fell into a "lather, rinse, repeat" cycle as Mari found more victims, but we had to reposition twice to different offices since the soldiers were getting out of Trixie's portal range. We'd wiped out most of the footsoldiers and one of the guys in exo-armor, but we'd had to delve deeper into the warehouse with less and less cover and had lost track of the two villains.

Mari stared into space as her insect searched around, but by now we were out in the open in the warehouse and very exposed. Everyone was visibly on edge as we anxiously kept watch all around us.

"Hic!"

The sudden yelping noise made us all jump, and it took us a moment to realize the source. Mari.

"Hic!" she repeated as she clapped her hand over her mouth.

"Are you fucking kidding me with this?" Blaze hissed. "She can't talk, but she can get the hiccups?"

Mari let out another muffled hiccup and frantically signed something.

Even Trixie was incredulous. "I don't care if you're nervous!" she snapped.

I motioned for them to keep it down. "Guys, you gotta— Oh, crud. Incoming."

The concussive blast from the guy in the exo-armor caught me full in the chest and sent me flying. It stung like hell but fortunately I was more surprised than hurt as I crashed butt-first into a stack of boxes, rebounded off of them and skidded to a halt next to a doorway.

Right at the feet of the two villains.

"Oh, hey, we were just looking for you guys," I said.

Any semblance of stealth or order evaporated as the room exploded into weapons fire, both theirs and ours. Killdozer and Killbane in particular seemed startled, obviously not expecting a buxom brunette heroine to throw herself at their feet. I used that brief hesitation and my slightly unusual position to punch them both in the nuts as hard as I could.

My aim was good and their howls of pain actually made me feel a little bad for opening with such a cheap shot. Killbane—the son—definitely took it the worse of the two and from what I remembered of him, he was considered the more dangerous with his "hellfire blasts." His father was very strong and tough, abilities that were not unlike my own...only more powerful. Which served to explain why he was able to recover so quickly from my punch.

"Bitch!" he yelled as he grabbed me painfully by my hair—ow!—and picked me up like I was a rag doll. He slammed me into the door frame and then swung me around and threw me through the wall and back into the warehouse. I was so disoriented that I hardly realized that I'd smashed into Trixie on my landing.

"Are you o—oh, boy," I said as Killdozer closed the distance and grabbed me by the arm. He picked me up and hammered me to the ground and out of the corner of my eye I saw Mari dive for cover among some pallets to avoid being hit. Pain lanced through my side as the room seemed to spin around, but I was starting to get just the teensiest bit annoyed at being used as an improvised melee weapon against my friends.

Killdozer still had a grip on me and I figured I'd try and catch him off-guard. Instead of punching him back, I took off flying into the air full-speed while he held on and then executed a speedy mid-air pirouette and kicked him as hard as I could in the chest. The maneuver surprised him enough that he loosened his grip just enough that my kick dislodged him and sent him sailing into some crates with a satisfying crash. He roared more from anger than from pain and as I hovered above the fight I used the brief reprieve to see how we were doing.

Trixie was conscious but disoriented, and Mari had ducked out of sight. It looked like TH and Blaze were engaged with the two guys in exo-armor and seemed to have things pretty well in hand, and I knew my playmate would be back on me any second. That just left—

"AAAAHHH!" I screamed as a curtain of fire enveloped me from below. In my short career as a hero I'd been shot at with all manner of attacks, but I'd never felt anything like that before. I looked at my burned side, half expecting it to be charred or worse and was surprised when the damage wasn't nearly as bad as I expected given how excruciating it had felt. I swooped down to take cover and wondered if maybe the attack had somehow set off my pain receptors directly. It wasn't much comfort.

Killbane stepped into view and was lining up another shot when I suddenly realized that in my desire to seek cover I'd landed right next to Trixie and that both TH and Blaze were right behind me. I'd bunched us up like bowling pins.

Unexpectedly, however, Killbane recoiled and swatted at his face like something had gotten in his eyes. "Thank you, Mari," I whispered as I watched him erupt into flames that covered his entire body, no doubt vaporizing any flying pests.

With the precious seconds Mari had bought me, I flew as fast as I could past TH and Blaze and grabbed the one remaining guy in exo-armor that was barely standing.

"Sorry, need to borrow this," I said to Blaze as I grabbed the guy. "Be a lamb and keep Killdozer busy a sec, will you?"

As I sped back at full-speed, I could hear the hulking villain's roar behind me followed by TH and Blaze's frantic shouting as they opened fire. But I had a different target. Using the armored guy as a shield, I smashed myself straight into Killbane who yelled out in pain as he smashed through the wall into the adjoining room. I dropped my now-unconscious "shield" to the floor.

Triggerhappy howled in pain as Killdozer smashed seemingly effortlessly through the force bubble TH had erected and straight into my teammate's mid-section, probably breaking a couple of ribs. Meanwhile, Blaze had taken to the air and was flying overhead and taking pot shots at the villain but both he and Trixie were holding back somewhat since TH was dangerously close to the line of fire.

"Portal TH out of there and then hit this guy hard," I said to Trixie before launching myself into the fray. I caught Killdozer with a flying tackle that frankly didn't do as much damage as I'd hoped, but it definitely got his attention as I saw TH get portaled back to where Trixie was standing. We tussled on the ground for a moment, but the next thing I knew he was behind me and had me in some kind of wrestling hold as he dragged me to my feet.

"AAH!" I cried as he nearly dislocated my shoulder.

"Okay, enough of this Junior Varsity shit," Killdozer growled to the team. "Stand down or I pull Barbie's arms off."

"Aww, c'mon, I haven't had this much fun since Cinco de Mayo," I said as I struggled helplessly in his grip.

From the other side of the room, Killbane appeared and looked like he was ready to murder someone. "Just hold her steady, old man," he said as flames erupted in his hands and trickled up his arms.

Trixie turned to face him. "Good thinking. Candy-ass pussy like you should stick with hitting girls who can't hit back."

"WHAT." Flames erupted all over his body as he locked his eyes on her with...well, with fire in his eyes.

"Trixie, I'm not so sure that's a great idea," I offered.

"Hey, why start being smart now, right? Not that this fool is in any danger of having a smart idea. You just got schooled by a bunch of Sidekicks, genius. You're gonna be the bitch of the cell block when they hear about this."

Furious, Killbane didn't even say anything as the fire across his body surged violently.

"PIÑATA!" Trixie yelled.

The "piñata maneuver" was a little something we cooked up when we noticed a certain pattern that emerged in some of our fights. First, I could take a punch pretty well. Second, whenever I fought someone else with super strength, they almost always found some excuse to wrestle and grapple with me and usually in ways that let them cop a feel, the perverts. Third, for some reason, they almost always seemed to forget that I could fly.

Killdozer had me in an unbreakable grip, but he soon discovered that didn't do much to immobilize someone who could defy gravity. Before he realized what was going on, I flew upwards as he clung on to me while we hovered there like a balloon. Then, before he had time to react, I spun us around so that his back was facing my team.

TH and Blaze opened fire with everything they had, and from behind me I heard the near simultaneous sounds of Killbane's hellfire blast and one of Trixie's portals that she'd doubtless opened in front of her to redirect his attack. The down side of this maneuver was that it still left me open to a lot of the spill-over damage that wasn't absorbed by Killdozer, so I gritted my teeth as I got pummeled and once again shrieked in pain as Killbane's fire raked against my body. But as bad as it hurt me, I knew it was nothing compared to what his father got hit with. His howls of agony were music to my ears.

When the assault ended, Killdozer slumped off my shoulders and fell heavily to the ground with a dull thud. Killbane was trying to figure out what just happened, so I spun around in mid-air and shot him a cocky grin.

"Ha! I bet that's gonna—hey!"

I was cut off in mid-taunt when a last-minute friendly fire attack from Blaze hit me smack in the middle of my chest.

"Sorry!" he said with a smile as he apologized for the late hit.

My mild annoyance flared to anger when I realized that he'd hit me with one of his corrosive acid shells. It wasn't enough to do any real damage to my invulnerable skin, but it ate through the front of my costume, dissolving it.

"Oh, you ass!" I said as I covered my naked breasts with my hands.

"I said sorry!" he laughed.

"I'LL KILL YOU FOR THAT!" Killbane roared, reminding us all that we weren't out of the woods yet. Enraged, the flames on his body changed to a blazing blue-white color and he started to shoot at us with murderous zeal. At first he didn't seem very discriminating in his attacks, but I realized that he'd started to fixate on Trixie as the focal point of his rage.

"AAAHHHH!!" she screamed in agony as one of his blasts caught her in the thigh, causing her to fall to the ground.

Blaze and TH opened fire, but Killbane's flames seemed to be shielding him from their blasts. He looked unstoppable.

I knew what I had to do.

As fast as I could I catapulted myself forward to make it look like I intended to hit him straight on and at the last second dodged out of the way as he fired at me and I narrowly avoided the lethal attack. I swung up behind him and before I could change my mind I grabbed him in an approximation of the hold that his father had used on me.

He was still engulfed in his aura of hellfire and as I held him tight, it burned me like a branding iron. I screamed as I held him and tried to focus on immobilizing his arms. But the pain...the pain was indescribable, as though it had seeped into every pore of my body, trying to annihilate me from within.

"You stupid cunt!" Killbane swore as he ramped up the flames so that they were nearly blinding. But still I held on. I'd prevented him from attacking my friends with his blasts, but while I held him I was helpless against his onslaught. Through the haze of pain, I looked at him and noticed that he wasn't even all that much older than I was, probably just some young punk with powers and an attitude. And as my consciousness started to waver, I started to notice silly little details...the smell of brimstone from his powers, the way one of his ears had a little nick taken out of it... All I could think was that it would be so easy to just let go...

"NO!" I yelled. I cried from the torture, but any tears I shed were vaporized instantly in the blast furnace I found myself in. I saw as my teammates stood there helplessly, not sure what they could do to help me. But as the fire started to pulse, I knew he was building to an explosion.

"Go! Get out of here!" I yelled.

They shouted something back but I couldn't hear their words. Trixie was crying and Blaze yelled something at her. The last thing I saw before the light got too blinding was the sight of my friends portaling away to safety.

I was going to die.

I was absolutely sure of it, but still I held on, past the point of all hope or reason.

And then, suddenly, the pain stopped.

Killbane still burned his inferno as he screamed threats and boasts at me, but all of a sudden it seemed ridiculous. I had him in a hold he couldn't possibly break, and I guess his powers had conked out! There wasn't any pain anymore, and if anything, I felt exhilarated standing there in the flames. I actually laughed! I released him and as he spun around to look at me, the confidence on his face evaporated.

"How the hell are you—?"

I hit him in the face as hard as I could and knocked him cold and he slumped to the floor, unconscious.

"Prodigy, you'd better be worth all this," I muttered as I tried to catch my breath.

Just then, I heard Trixie's portal open as the others poured out. They were ready for action, but obviously unprepared for the scene in front of them.

"Holy shit," Blaze said. At first I thought he was just impressed with my accomplishment when the puerile little snickers from him and TH reminded me about my naked boobs.

"Damn it," I muttered as I covered myself up with my hands. The nanomesh fibers of my costume struggled to repair themselves to restore a modicum of decency, so I pulled my cape around to cover myself up.

"You don't have to do that," Blaze sniggered.

"You did this on purpose, you turd!"

"Hey, accidents happen!" The little punk couldn't even say it with a straight face, and TH gave him a high five.

The girls were equally put off by the childish antics, but to their credit maintained a semblance of professionalism.

"How did you beat him?" Trixie asked, looking at the unconscious Killbane.

I shrugged. "I'm not sure. I think I outlasted him. I guess I got lucky."

She punched me in the arm. "Dumbass."

Mari had searched nearby and waved for us to come over.

"What is it?" I asked.

"Hic!" she hiccupped, causing Blaze to growl in annoyance. She shook her head and pointed at a crate and signed a message to Trixie.

"It must be what they were after," I said. "What is it?" The crate was sealed, but there was a long identifying number on it as well as a series of warnings. I snapped a picture with my I-Comm.

From outside we could hear the sound of sirens as the cops arrived, obviously in response to our fight.

Blaze smiled and rubbed his hands together briskly. "Okay! Everyone just shut up and let me do all the talking."

"Man, I hope this was worth it," I muttered.

"It might have been if you'd actually been here," a woman's voice said from right behind us.

We all practically jumped in shock and spun around to see a woman—obviously a super—with short brown hair wearing black polykinetic body armor and carrying a red energy shield. She had a red utility belt that had a pistol and what looked to be a pretty mean-looking sword. We belatedly hunkered down into fighting stances, but she was just standing there and didn't seem particularly impressed.

"Guys, wait!" Trixie said. "We know her. This is Harridan."

Trixie and Mari relaxed visibly, so the rest of us slowly followed suit. Mari breathed a heavy sigh of relief and signed something to Trixie.

"Well, at least it got rid of your hiccups. Harridan, what are you doing here?" she asked. "Wait, were you following us?"

"It's a good thing! What the hell were you thinking, taking these guys on?"

Blaze stepped forward. "We took them out is what we did. And now we're going to go get credit for it."

"Stop right there, little man," Harridan said firmly as she blocked his path with her arm.

Blaze froze and turned very slowly to look at her. "You want to dance, skag?"

I closed my eyes and winced.

"Oh, would I ever," she said tightly. "But you have to sneak out the back and run along home."

"And why would we do that?"

"Because you halfwits were stupid enough to take on a squad of guys way above your power level without your mentors present. I know who their mentor is," she said as she glanced towards a very guilty-looking Trixie and Mari, "and maybe Demetria will take the heat and bail them out. But if any of you three are 'undeclared,' you're going down with nobody to protect you. So, I guess it comes down to this: you were stupid enough to have gotten this far, but are you stupid enough to go out there and admit what you did?"

We all stared at each other uncertainly. But we all knew how this was going to go down.

"God damn it!" Quasarblaze swore once we were a safe distance away on a quiet downtown street. He viciously kicked the corner of a nearby wall, sending pieces of brick and mortar flying. "That bitch! We do all the work, we get all the takedowns, and she's over there right now taking all the motherfucking credit!"

"Hey, we got off light. That could have gone a lot worse," said Trixie.

"QB's right, that was some serious bullshit," Triggerhappy grumbled.

I was inclined to agree with the guys, but I was exhausted and felt like ten miles of bad road and wasn't in the mood for an argument. "Well, the important thing is that we stopped the robbery and those guys are on their way to prison."

"How the hell is that the important thing?" Blaze demanded.

"You can blog about your disappointment," I snapped. Then my anger at Blaze reminded me of something else. "Oh, and you want to explain that bullcrap you pulled back there during the fight?"

TH jumped in. "Hey, QB said that was an accident!"

I walked right up to Blaze and looked him square in the face. His visor obscured his eyes, but I stared into the reflective surface, seeing my own angry face.

"I want to hear him say it."

Blaze laughed once like I was being ridiculous, but I maintained my intense glare. He cocked a nervous grin. "This is so stupid," he said, smiling and looking away and then back. "It's like I said, it was an accident."

Trixie and Mari looked at each other in amazement and then sidled up alongside me. "Why you little..." Trixie whispered, "You did do it on purpose! You jackass, we were in the middle of a fight!"

"Hey, nobody got hurt! Her costume's fixing itself, no harm done. So her puppies got a little air. Just look at 'em! It's a miracle they stayed in as long as they did."

I started to speak up but Trixie was on a roll. "Her pupp—? Do you even hear yourself? You think girls like being objectified like that? I mean, it's not like she chose to look like she does!"

I could feel the moral high ground slipping away beneath my feet. "Um, right..." I muttered.

"C'mon, it was no big deal."

"Looked plenty big to me," TH snickered.

"Okay, that's it," I said. I'd hoped I was done with fighting for the evening, but I felt like I could manage one more for a special occasion.

"Wait," Trixie said as she put her hand on my arm. "I have something so much better."

Mari looked at me pleadingly so I grit my teeth and nodded to Trixie as she slowly turned to the two guys.

"Have you boys ever heard of the curse of Venus Castina?" she asked. "No? Well, let me enlighten you." A small flash of magical green fire erupted from her fingers to reveal a pretty pink orchid in her hand. "Lovely, isn't it? It's very special because it only grows in one very unique place. Because you see, the 'curse' was actually meant as a blessing from the goddess Aphrodite, given to a male priest as a boon of her gratitude. She would cast the spell, and before their amazed eyes, the priest's manhood would change color and then twist and change...until *POOF*!" She held up the blossom suddenly. "It changed into this very flower."

Blaze laughed nervously once. "That is such bullshit."

Trixie approached him slowly as she brandished the flower in front of her. "Oh, no! Because you see, the flower only blossomed there because it was planted in the most fertile place possible," she explained. "Within the priest's brand-new, warm...wet...vagina." She waved her hand over the plant, and the petals opened up dramatically to reveal a surprisingly long and thick pink stamen that stood erect from the middle of the blossom in an extremely phallic way. The guys weren't laughing anymore and their eyes were fixed on the flower.

Trixie gave them a little smirk. "It was customary for the new 'girls' to give their new equipment a test run with one of the virile male acolytes. The young lad would come up to her and—pluck—!" she moved the flower in a sudden gesture and they both jumped, "—the flower from her maidenhood. She would then wear it in her hair as she experienced sex as a woman for the very first time," she said. "It's where the term 'deflowering' comes from."

She placed the blossom in Blaze's hand as he looked nervously at the phallic flower. "Now. If you shitheads ever pull a stunt like that again, I swear to almighty Kronos that I will bestow this 'blessing' on both of you, and you'll each get a pretty little flower of your own."

She spun around and walked away as her cape billowed dramatically behind her. Mari and I were just as stunned as the boys, but we hurried after her.

"Jesus," I whispered as we walked away. "Would you really do that to them?"

"What? No, I made the whole thing up," she scoffed. "I saw that freaky flower in the flower shop across the street and teleported it over. It really looked like a dong, didn't it?" she said.

I stared at her in amazement.

"Glamour and misdirection," she said with a grin. "Also, I've been taking a creative writing class."

I said goodnight to Trixie and Mari, eager to get home and maybe get a few hours of sleep before I had to be up for school the next morning. My entire body hurt, but at least my shapeshifting power helped the healing process along. With any luck I'd be back to peak performance after a few days, but in the meantime my power helped to cosmetically hide the cuts and bruises. And my costume had repaired most of the damage as well, having knitted itself together at least well enough to avoid exposing myself. So I just felt like hell.

After the girls left I flew to a nearby rooftop and paused just long enough to send a message to Caleb saying I had a lot to tell him in the morning. But just as I was about to take off I heard the sound of something metal fall at my feet. Puzzled, I looked down at my communicator, thinking that maybe something had come loose during the fight.

"Huh. That's—"

The explosion knocked me off my feet and sent me skidding across the rooftop. It stung like hell—especially since I was still nursing my wounds from the fight—but it could have been a lot worse. The bright light blinded me and my ears were ringing as I blinked and tried to see who it was that attacked me, but I knew I was in no shape for a fight. I was still reeling and wasn't even sure which end was up, but I took off flying in the hopes of getting some distance between us.

Unfortunately, being almost blind, what I thought was "up" was actually sideways, and I only made it about twenty feet before I plowed into the rooftop again. I put my hands on the ground to get my bearings just in time to see through bleary eyes something like a small silver ball come right at me. Unable to react in time, I braced myself...as it rebounded harmlessly off my chest and fell to the ground with a soft metal clank.

"Shit!" I heard a man's voice say.

Well, I was glad to hear that someone else was having a tough night.

I wasted no time and launched myself skywards as I tried to get my bearings, but almost immediately I saw another one of those grenades coming at me. It tagged me in the stomach and deployed some kind of ultra-strong tanglewire that wrapped around my legs, up my chest, and pinned one of my arms against my body. I smiled. Obviously this guy didn't realize that since I could fly, that wasn't going to do anything to immobili—

"AAAH!" I cried out as the device started to screech out a painful shrieking noise. In an instant I lost all sense of equilibrium and my flight path went from being erratic to absolutely out of control. Before I even realized where I was or what was going on, I slammed full speed into something hard. I was so disoriented I wasn't even sure if it was the ground or a wall.

As I writhed on the ground and struggled to free myself, my vision cleared up enough to see someone standing in front of me. I could tell he was a super and was dressed in form-fitting tactical body armor with a utility belt and bandolier. His short-cropped silver-white hair was visible above the mask that covered his aged face, and I noticed that his costume favored dark colors with midnight blues and purples...just like mine.

"Prodigy?" I croaked.

"I hope you're actually on the cheerleading squad, 'cause if this is what heroes look like these days, I weep for the future," he growled.