The suitcase oddly yielded clothes for a small boy and a dress the same size. They were musty but still good. Kirk tossed the washed clothes and curtains into the dryer, then sat repairing stuffed animals for the rest of the afternoon.
TWINS by Marie, Part 16 - Jenny’s House, Day 1
by Marie C.
Linda and Kirk pulled up on the shoulder of the road in front of Jenny’s. The plan was for Linda to spend a day in San Francisco looking at fabrics and stay overnight with old friends. Kirk would remain with Jenny ostensibly to help with her wardrobe and housecleaning for two days and nights.
For his adventure away from the old house Kirk picked a simple outfit - a red cardigan, white blouse and red and blue tartan pleated knee length skirt. A white hair band framed his face for hair now below his shoulders. Nail color and sparingly applied lipstick matched the sweater. Other than that he wore white knee socks and Mary Jane flats. Clothes he needed for work went into a small overnight case.
After a big hug Jenny led him up to a small room upstairs across from hers which she said belonged to her daughter. “You can stay here tonight though it’s not very clean. These days I don’t have the time or energy to keep things up. Maybe after you look around you can tell me what to do about my daughter's things.”
“If you don’t get too worn out today you can help with my room tomorrow. In the attic there are trunks filled with wonderful things that belonged to my grandmother. Your mom said you knew about old-style clothes.” She showed the boy where the housecleaning supplies were and waited in case he had any questions.
But there was nothing to wait for. She watched as he pulled on a duster, cotton gloves and headscarf, gave the room a professional glance. “I’ll see what I can do. If the things are too far gone I’ll tell you to throw them out. I saw an awful lot the other day that weren’t worth keeping.” The last was said with pursed lips and a resigned expression.
Jenny went down the stairs mumbling something about her garden expecting the boy to putter around for a while and then come down whining about too much work or needing help. “Most kids that age never last twenty minutes.”
Kirk looked around the room. There was a cheap vanity, chest of drawers and cheval mirror on a stand. A small selection of girls’ books were piled on the chest - Nancy Drew mysteries, girl scout manuals and animal and plant care guides.
Before he started work he sat on the edge of the bed and pondered his time with Ana not without some fondness. This time he didn’t feel at all confused or outraged. If anything he felt stronger and certainly more self-assured at dressing and living as a girl. After all he had instructed Ana in new ways of living, of being more adult and assertive of herself as a young woman. Yes, he had made good use of the training received from Miss Carradine and Madame - even from Marlene.
More frightening was his brief experience with Clara which had forced him to deal with the possibility of sex. While scary it made him curious about what might be in store for him as a girl. Emma never dealt with her sexuality, she never had a chance. On the other hand Ana’s memories of love-making, childbirth and especially her daily breast feeding left a major imprint on his personality. As a nursing mother he more than ever wished he was a young woman, but with a personality like Emma. He looked in the cheval mirror and liked what he saw. Today he was going to use the name Darlene from here on out with whatever doubts or problems the decision might incur.
Turning back to the task at hand he opened the closet and found a half dozen dusty cotton dresses for a girl his size hanging on wire hangers. Shoes were helter-skelter at the bottom and cardboard boxes on the shelf were thick with dust. Nothing had been touched for ages. Dust mice skittered across the closet floor with every step.
Going through the dresser he found old pants, sweaters and blouses, most of which were faded or stained. After checking whether the bed was covered properly he laid everything out, useless in one pile, useful in another. Then he cleaned the dresser inside and out. “No liner paper, hmm.”
The vanity yielded a mish mash of of dried cosmetics, powders and hardened nail polish all of which went into an old waste basket. A few combs, brushes and nail files needed cleaning. Drawers were cleaned out and the top wiped. The mirror got a wash and the windows a swipe. All curtains came down for a stint in the washer. Floor and walls got the dust mop and vacuum. Eventually nothing remained except the boxes in the closet and an old brown suitcase from under the bed which he dusted off and laid on the floor.
The good dresses all needed washing and an iron. He held a few up to the mirror. Two cotton play frocks were good. All the shoes were too brittle. A pale green spaghetti strap ball gown in a clothing bag was nice but turning brown. He tried the matching heels. Too big, though it made him wonder. In time he would need one or two good pair of three inch black or navy pumps. He dusted the closet, then sat at the vanity to check his hair and nails.
Downstairs he looked for Jenny who didn’t seem to be in evidence and so ended up wandering through the kitchen, dining room and parlor. Tall shelves held dozens of books. A one shelf showed nothing but titles that said trans... something. Others were about plants, flowers and wild animals. There was a small TV set, odds and ends of old mismatched furniture and photos of Jenny when she was younger with a girl his age.
Two cats lounged in a window box sunning themselves. Diablo lay on his back, feet spread giving his stomach a tongue and paw bath. Persephone ignored Darlene as he moved through the room, accepted a few pets and protested loudly when he attempted to pick her up.
He examined curious artifacts like baskets and arrowheads. Some polished rocks and seashells lay on the window sills. Mostly everything was covered in dust. “I don’t keep it very well, do I?” Jenny said unannounced. “My daughter moved to the city with her boy friend ten years ago because she got tired of living here. But I think you came down to tell me something.”
Kirk led Jenny back upstairs and showed her things that required decisions. “The cosmetics and shoes aren’t usable. I didn’t open the suitcase or boxes. I need to know where to wash things.” He was very clipped and precise and stood there waiting, arms folded on his chest.
Jenny was impressed. He had gone through the room in little more than an hour. In the past she had put off working there because her daughter’s things brought back too many memories that she didn’t want to disturb. Darlene had done her a big favor by taking away the worst decisions.
After lunch they carried useless things to the trash. Others went into a box for the school rummage sale. Darlene put the washables in a rackety old washer and turned it on.
Next Jenny she asked him to check the boxes and suitcase. One box contained dolls which Darlene pulled out one by one and set on the dresser. Most were nice but some stuffed animals were sad with bent ears and stuffing sticking out. “I can sew them up,” he thought. “Maybe poor kids can play with them.” The other box yielded school report cards, old vaccination certificates, snapshots of a young girl and her chums, lesson copy books and souvenirs from places like Marine World, Fisherman’s Wharf, the Cliff House etc. At the bottom were two different snapshots of a very young boy who looked like a twin to the girl.
The suitcase oddly yielded clothes for a small boy and a dress the same size. They were musty but still good. Kirk tossed the washed clothes and curtains into the dryer, then sat repairing stuffed animals for the rest of the afternoon.
When he was done Jenny called him to supper. She was a Vegan vegetarian so they had lots of fresh carrots, broccoli and spaghetti. Surprisingly it was tasty and filling. He ate quickly and started to get up.
“I have to get the laundry and finish the ironing,” he explained. Jenny waved him down and said, “Let’s sit in the living room and have pie made from those berry bushes outside. Your mother said you have lots of dreams and I want to hear about them. I like dreams.”
He looked in a mirror and flicked a hair. “Can you wait a minute. I need to wash and change first. After all the dust and dirt I feel so icky. Could I wear one of the dresses in the closet? I forgot to bring a change.”
Jenny nodded impressed with the boy’s firmness and self-confidence. She didn’t remember her daughter being that way, or herself for that matter. He was back in a jiffy in a floral short sleeve cotton dress with white collar and cuffs. His hair had been combed and dressed with red barrettes.
“Can you tie me in back, Jenny?” he asked. Sitting upright he carefully arranged his skirts, knees together as he held the spoon and cup. “This is good” he smiled. “How long have you lived here, Jenny?” he asked in a rather adult way.
“Longer than I like to think, Kirk. Is it Kirk or Darlene ?” Jenny continued to be impressed with the boy’s feminine persona. “Your mother said you were really a boy.”
Kirk blushed, turned his head down and said in a small voice, “Yes, but I like girl’s clothes, especially skirts and dresses. I used to wear pants all the time but after one of my dreams I don’t wear them anymore, not even girls’ pants. Besides mom won’t let me wear them. She wants me to be her little girl.”
“Mom and Sandy call me Darlene and old Bill calls me Marlene. Even mom calls me Marlene sometimes. They get me mixed up with my cousin but I don’t mind. I kind of like it and I think Marlene wouldn't either. But I want to be called Darlene from now on. I’ve made up my mind.”
Kirk’s admissions were a surprise. “It’s all right with me, Darlene. I think boys should be able to wear dresses. In my house you can wear anything you want or be anybody you like.”
“You did a terrific job of cleaning up Della’s room. I’m going to tell you a secret I haven’t told many people. My daughter used to be a boy, but wanted to wear dresses like you. Now she’s a girl and lives with her boyfriend in the city. You’re the first person I’ve told that to in a long time.”
Darlene was surprised to hear there were other boys like him. So he told Jenny about the Emma, Clara and Ana dreams, how Marlene comes to visit at night, how they go upstairs to the funny room with two doors and sit with the girls, how they move into him and he has more dreams. He gets scared and doesn’t know what to do but goes along with it. Afterward he thinks about things differently, especially after his dream about Emma. Jenny listened intently to Kirk interrupting only now and then to encourage him when he faltered. When they were done it was nearly bedtime.
Jenny said “Well, I’m getting old and need to get to bed. Let me help you with the things upstairs.” They moved the old clothes to the vanity and dresser tops. Darlene pulled out a practical cotton nightgown and a pair of fuzzy slippers. Jenny kissed him and tucked him in.
She didn’t go to bed right away. She sat looking at the photos Linda brought, then leafed through books that dealt with occult matters like spirit possession, sudden behavior change and places in the world that were supposed to be power spots. She thought about Darlene’s description of the Michi dream. It sounded familiar and she couldn’t think why. Tomorrow she would rummage through her papers and see if she could refresh her memory. She went over notes on her transgender clients. Mostly she remembered her daughter.
One of her final thoughts was that the strong resemblance between Marlene and Darlene must have something to do with everything that’s going on. She prayed for understanding of Kirk’s situation. She had decided to help him or her if there anything she could do.
