© March 2013

Chapter Twenty: Trouble in Paradise

    Joan was already in the pool on the Thursday morning when Jessica finally arrived in the pool room for her swim.

     “How was the babysitting last night?” Joan asked when she saw Jessica at the side of the pool.

     “It was fine.” Jessica answered just before she dropped into the pool.

     “Is everything alright sweetie?” Joan asked, already knowing it wasn’t, just from Jessica’s body language.

     “Everything is just fine.” Jessica said just before she started her swim, letting Joan know she didn’t want to talk about whatever it was bothering her.

    Joan watched Jessica’s aggressive swim pattern and decided to just let her work it out her system, hoping that she would want to speak about it later.

     “Did you and Kirstin have words or something?” Joan asked while they sat eating breakfast, well Joan was eating breakfast; Jessica was just pushing her fruit around in her yogurt.

     “No... I’m just trying to work something out.” Jessica said, not willing to say anymore than that about it.

     “You know what they say.” Joan pushed.

     “No, what do they say...?” Jessica asked as she finally looked up from her breakfast and made eye contact with Joan.

     “A problem shared is a problem halved.” Joan smiled.

     “It’s not that kind of a problem.” Jessica frowned.

     “Does this problem involve Kirstin?” Joan asked.

     “No... Well kind of, I think.” Jessica said looking confused herself.

     “What happened to cause this...? Whatever this is.” Joan frowned; not liking the fact that she was even more confused that Jessica.

    Jessica looked at Joan like she was about to say something half a dozen times before she finally let out a sigh and spoke. “Kirstin started playing around last night while we were babysitting, and I reacted to it.” Jessica said nervously, not sure she wanted to have this talk with Joan.

     “And what’s wrong with that?” Joan asked, not sure where Jessica was going with this.

     “I mean I started to get a...” Jessica couldn’t say the word.

     “Erection...?” Joan finished for her.

     “Yes...” Jessica replied with shame in her voice as she looked down at the table again, not able to look Joan in the eyes. She did look at Joan though when she heard her giggling. “It’s not a laughing matter.” Jessica frowned angrily.

     “It is a little funny.” Joan giggled. “Kirstin is a very pretty girl, and you love her, so how else do you expect to respond to her?” Joan asked.

     “But I’m a woman now as well.” Jessica whined, sounding more like a child that a grown woman.

     “Please don’t take this the wrong way sweetie, but you’re not.” Joan sighed. “Yes you look like a woman, but you’re still a man where it counts, and that part of you is going to react when Kirstin starts pushing all the right buttons.”

     “Does that mean I don’t really want to be a woman then?” Jessica asked with pain in her voice.

     “I can’t answer that question for you that is why you have to start seeing a therapist, so they can help you unlock the reason for you doing this, and work out which side of the fence you want to live.” Joan sounded sad for the hard choices Jessica had ahead of her. “I really think it’s about time you moved forward and had a word with this doctor friend of Cathy and Jane’s.” Joan added.

     “Do you think we should see if she can fit me in while we’re down in London in a couple of weeks?” Jessica asked when she saw where Joan was going with this.

     “Yes I do.” Joan answered. “We can always stop an extra couple of days if needed.”

     “What about work?” Jessica looked worried. “You have meetings on the Tuesday and Wednesday.” Jessica pointed out.

     “We will move them.” Joan said in a matter of fact way. “Helping you is just as important as helping them, if not more important.” Joan argued.

     “Thank you mother.” Jessica smiled, feeling better now she’d shared her problem with Joan.

     “How did you leave things with Kirstin last night?” Joan asked.

     “A little on the frosty side.” Jessica admitted.

     “You’re lucky to have someone like Kirstin willing to come along for the ride you know, so I think you should give her a call later and apologise for being such a gooseberry.” Joan grinned, which made Jessica giggle.

     “I’ll call her later in the morning, mother.” Jessica promised.

     “Good...!” Joan said looking much happier. “Now tell me all about your adventures in babysitting.” Joan smiled. Jessica then spent the rest of their breakfast filling Joan in on the babysitting from the night before.

    Jessica had been too busy since arriving at the office to give Kirstin a call and apologise for the way she was acting the night before, which also meant she’d not had time to call Jane and speak to her about the way she was feeling either.

     “Is there trouble in paradise? Did someone have a falling out with their boyfriend last night...?” Jessica heard Rebecca say as she entered the outer office where Jessica worked. “What does the ‘K’ stand for anyway?” Rebecca asked, sounding a little too smug with herself.

    Jessica looked up in confusion from her computer screen to find out what the hell Rebecca was talking about, that was when she saw Rebecca holding a large bunch of flowers.

     “I’m truly sorry, love you. K.” Rebecca repeated as she read the card out that had been pinned to the front of the flowers in a small envelope, but was now in Rebecca’s hand.

     “You should try minding your own business you nosy cow, before someone takes a swing at you.” Jessica growled as she shot up and grabbed the flowers from her, and then the card. “Now get back to reception where you belong.” Jessica added as she held the flowers in one hand and pushed a shocked looking Rebecca out the door with the other.

    The flowers looked beautiful, and Jessica looked at the card and saw that Kirstin had wrote it out herself, so she’d taken the time to call in at a florist to pick out the flowers and then have them sent to her.

     “Like I told you at breakfast Jessica. That is one very special woman you have there.” Joan whispered in her ear, making her jump.

    Joan had come out when she heard raised voices, and she was just in time to see Jessica pushing a shocked Rebecca back out the office again.

     “Do you mind if I take five minutes to give her a call and say how sorry I am for being such a bitch last night?” Jessica asked with tears in her eyes. As Jonathon, Jessica would never think of crying over someone giving him flowers, but as Jessica, she was allowed to let her emotions run wild and not worry about it.

     “You take as long as you need sweetie.” Joan smiled as she turned around and returned to her office.

    Jessica got out her cell phone and called Kirstin, hoping that she wasn’t too busy to answer her phone. She obviously wasn’t as she answered after the second ring.

     “Hi Jess, did you get my gift...?” Kirstin’s voice asked on the other end of the phone.

     “Hi, yes I did, and they are really beautiful, but not as beautiful as you though.” Jessica blushed. “I’m the one that should be sorry for acting like such a bitch to you last night.” Jessica said before Kirstin could say anything.

     “No... You had every right to be upset with me.” Kirstin argued. “I over stepped the mark.” She added. “Are we still good?” Kirstin asked nervously.

     “Good in what way?” Jessica sounded confused.

     “As in you’re not breaking up with me are you?” Kirstin asked in a timed voice.

     “No...!” Jessica shouted. “I’m just a little confused about my own reaction to your touch, but I spoke with Mother about it, and she made me understand something.” Jessica explained. “You’re the only girl I’ve ever loved Kirstin, and the only one to make me react like I did last night, but it was something I wasn’t expecting to happen.”

     “I can only imagine what you must be going through at the minute, but I love you so much, and just want to be a part of your life in any way I can.” Kirstin sighed.

     “I’m going to call Jane and have a word with her about the way I’m feeling, to see if this is normal, and I’m also going to be booking an appointment to see that doctor while I’m in London, so we might end up stopping a couple of extra days.” Jessica warned.

     “I’ve booked the week off, so I’m all yours until the Friday.” Kirstin purred down the phone. “And we will make this work. I’ll just have to show you how two women make love.” Kirstin added with a grin in her voice.

     “I can’t say I’d thought about sex much before last night, which was one of the reasons I freaked out so much when I had such a strong reaction to your touch.” Jessica whispered.

     “Have you not had any reaction from the clothes or your own touch then?” Kirstin asked sounding a little surprised.

     “No, nothing, well not like last night” Jessica shrugged, even though Kirstin couldn’t see her do it.

     “Not even when you first dress each day, or you wear something extra nice?” Kirstin asked.

     “No, do you feel sexually excited when you dress each day?” Jessica said.

     “No, they're just clothes to me.” Kirstin replied.

     “Well it’s the same for me. They’re just clothes I wear.”

     “I guess I still have a lot to learn.” Kirstin admitted with a sigh.

     “We can learn it together then, because I’m still learning who I am as well.” Jessica admitted.

     “If it helps, I like what you’re becoming.” Kirstin said with a smile in her voice.

     “Thanks, that means a lot, and thanks for just signing the card with a ‘K’.” Jessica smiled.

     “I remembered what you said about that woman called Rebecca that mans the main reception, and didn’t want her spreading to much gossip about you and me.” Kirstin sounded like she was pouting as she said it.

     “She just thinks I had a falling out with my boyfriend.” Jessica giggled. “I’m not sure her tiny little mind could cope with the truth.” Jessica added as she had a pleasant image in her mind of Rebecca’s head exploding if she ever found out about Jessica really being a man.

     “She sounds like a real bitch to me.” Kirstin huffed.

     “You’ll get no argument off me on that one.” Jessica laughed.

     “I’ll let you give this Jane a call and speak to her then, but please remember that I’m here for you, and I’m willing to move at your pace.” Kirstin promised.

     “Okay, thanks, and I love you.” Jessica smiled.

     “I love you too.” Kirstin replied before ending the call with what sounded like a kiss.

    Jessica was just scrolling down her list of contacts looking for Jane’s number when her cell phone started ringing and she saw it was Debbie calling her.

     “Hi Deb’s...” Jessica said sounding happy to be hearing from her.

     “Hi Jess, are you doing alright, you looked upset over something last night when you left.” Debbie asked her voice full of worry.

     “I was a little upset last night, but I’m over it now.” Jessica replied.

     “What happened?” Debbie pushed for details.

    Jessica thought about lying and making something up, but she didn’t want to worry Debbie and stop her from asking her and Kirstin to babysit again, so she let out a sigh and then started to explain. “Kirstin was playing around and she managed to get a reaction out of me, and I got upset about it.”

     “What did you get upset about?” Debbie asked sounding puzzled. “Kirstin seems nice, and even Paul said she was cute.” Debbie admitted. “He earned himself a slap for it though.” Debbie giggled.

     “I was embarrassed over the way I got excited.” Jessica mumbled.

     “Oh I see.” Debbie said with understanding in her voice. “But how else are you going to respond?” Debbie asked.

     “That’s what Joan said when I explained it to her this morning.” Jessica sighed as she realised how silly she was being about it all. “She said that even though I look like a woman and act like one, I’m still a man when it comes to my feelings, or something like that.” Jessica explained.

     “And you were having doubts about the path you’ve chosen?” Debbie asked, but already knew the answer by the tone of her voice.

     “Yes basically.” Jessica said.

     “Even after you’ve had all the surgeries and you look like a woman naked, you will still react the same way when Kirstin comes on to you, but it will just get a different response because all your pluming will be different.” Debbie tried to explain. “I really think you need to talk to someone about all this.” Debbie added.

     “Joan also said that as well.” Jessica giggled at just how well the two of them thought alike. “I’m going to book my appointment with this doctor in London for the same time as I’m down there with Kirstin.”

     “Good...! I’ve been a little worried about you putting this off, as I know Joan has been when I’ve spoken with her about you.” Debbie admitted. “You need to start seeing some light at the end of the tunnel you’ve found yourself in.” Debbie added sounding more like a bossy big sister than a friend.

     “I was just about to call Jane and get things sorted out when you called me.” Jessica giggled some more. “You seem a little happier today, did you enjoy the night off last night?” Jessica asked, wanting to change the subject.

     “Yes, it was amazing, and just what the doctor ordered.” Debbie said with a grin in her voice. “I was hoping that you and Kirstin would want to babysit again in the future, but I had my doubts when you both left last night.”

     “It was nothing the twins did.” Jessica promised. “They were both little angels, apart from the little stink they both made.” Jessica giggled.

     “Sorry about that.” Debbie said in a pained voice. “So I’m covered when Paul and I want to go out again then?” Debbie asked.

     “Yep, just let me know when and Kirstin and I will be there, or I will if it’s on a night she’s working, but even then I bet I can talk mother into coming with me.” Jessica grinned.

     “Thanks Jess, you’re a real life saver. Now stop talking to me and get on the phone to Jane. Bye...!” Debbie said just before the line went dead.

    Jessica giggled at just how fast Debbie had ended the call, but Jessica went back to scrolling through her contacts until she found Jane’s number, then she sent her a text asking to call when she had some free time.

    It was ten minutes later when Jessica’s cell phone started buzzing to let her know she was getting a call. Jessica picked her phone up and saw Jane’s name flashing on the screen, so she hit the answer button.

     “Hey girlfriend...!” Jessica shouted into the phone, using the same answer Jane used when she called her.

    There was giggling on the other end of the line before Jane answered. “Hi Girlfriend, so what’s this important thing you needed to talk about?” Jane asked, referring to the text Jessica had sent her.

     “I wanted to ask you something, but now I have you on the phone, I’m worried it might be a little too personal of a question to talk about.” Jessica nervously babbled.

     “You can talk to me about anything Jessica.” Jane said sounding serious. “I have the support of my sisters, brothers and everyone else, but I know that you’re all on your own up there when it comes to your lifestyle, so please feel free to ask me anything, and also tell me anything.”

     “It sounds so strange to hear you acting so grown up for once.” Jessica giggled nervously, trying to stall for time.

     “Stop trying to change the subject and spill it.” Jane replied. Jessica could picture Jane stood there frowning at her with a hand on her hip.

     “Okay, sorry.” Jessica sighed. “I went babysitting with Kirstin last night, and she started playing around.” Jessica started to explain. “And before I knew it, I was reacting to her touching me, and it left me feeling confused about things.”

     “You think Kirstin burst your happy little bubble of feeling like a girl?” Jane asked.

    Jessica was quiet for a couple of seconds while she thought about the way Jane just worded it, and realised that was right. She had been lost in the false idea that she was already a female. “Yes, she burst my little bubble.” Jessica admitted.

     “We were all worried this might happen to you.” Jane sighed.

     “We...?” Jessica sounded worried.

     “My sisters and I were talking, and they said they were worried about you being Jessica without starting your transition for real.” Jane explained. “The doctors and therapists are there to help you understand things like this, so you don’t freak out when it happens.” Jane said with pity in her voice.

     “Mother and Debbie both said it was just my body reacting to Kirstin’s touch, and it doesn’t mean I want to remain a male.”

     “And they would both be right.” Jane agreed. “Once you start on medication, it will be harder for you to react like you did, but if you do, it doesn’t mean you’re doing the wrong thing, it just means that Kirstin is pushing all your right buttons.” Jane giggled.

     “I’ve decided it’s time to call this doctor friend of Cathy’s and get myself booked in.” Jessica said feeling better now she’d finally decided to take that first step in her real transition.

     “Good, she’s been waiting to hear from you.” Jane said.

     “You’ve spoken with her about me already...?” Jessica asked.

     “Don’t sound so worried, she’s like a mother to me and the others, and she was sat with the rest of us while we were speaking about you.” Jane explained. “Just give her a call and tell her your name, she will help you sort out coming to see her.”

     “I was hoping I could see her while we’re down over the bank holiday weekend.” Jessica explained her idea. “Or I could stop an extra couple of days and speak with her then, but that would mean me stopping at the hotel for an extra day or two.” Jessica sounded nervous as she said it. She didn’t want Jane thinking she was taking advantage of her.

     “The penthouse is yours for as long as you want.” Jane said right away. “Jayden and Carl will understand once I tell them what you need to do. They will both be glad to help.” Jane added.

     “Thanks Jane. I’ll have to call her later in the day, because I need to get some work done, and I’ve been on the phone for the past hour.” Jessica giggled when she saw the time.

     “I’ll call my mother and let her know to expect your call, if that’s alright with you...?” Jane asked.

     “No, I don’t mind.” Jessica replied, glad that Jane was willing to do that for her.

     “I better let you go and get some work done then, you lazy so and so.” Jane giggled. “Later girlfriend...!” Jane added before the line went dead.

    Jessica checked to make sure she still had the business card for Dr Prudence Walker, which she did, she looked at the business card all the time as she told herself she was going to call her, but would always think of some reason not to call, but this time she knew she needed to make that call, if only for her own sanity.

     “Did you manage to speak with Jane about your little problem?” Joan asked while they were having lunch in her office.

     “Yes, and she agreed with everything you said, and she’s fine with us stopping a little longer after the bank holiday weekend.” Jessica smiled. “She said she was going to give the doctor a heads up to expect a call from me later today as well.”

     “Make sure you call her this time then.” Joan frowned. “I don’t think you’ll be truly happy until this is all behind you, and you know who you are.” Joan added in a more loving tone.

     “Yes mother.” Jessica giggled.

     “Did you clear the air with Kirstin as well?” Joan asked.

     “Yes, and I thanked her for the flowers.” Jessica grinned.

     “Good, but you might want to think about apologising to Rebecca at some point.”

     “Why...? She was being a nosey little cow.” Jessica grumbled.

     “I know, but you did push her, which could be bad for you if she wanted to take it further.” Joan warned.

     “Alright, I’ll go and see her after lunch.” Jessica agreed.

     “I’d tell her that the ‘K’ stands for Kirstin as well, that should stun her enough to make her forget all about you pushing her, but she may want more details.” Joan grinned.

     “But if I tell her that. She will know that I’m a lesbian, or will be one day.” Jessica looked shocked at what Joan wanted her to do.

     “Everyone is going to find out about you and Kirstin sooner or later, so it would be better to get it out in the open, and you’re not the only lesbian in the company, so don’t worry about it.” Joan waved off Jessica’s worries.

     “It will be funny to see the look on her face when she finds out who K is.” Jessica giggled.

    They finished their lunch, and Jessica cleared away their plates and got everything washed and put away before she went to find Rebecca. She wasn’t hard to find, because she was only ever at the main reception when not on her break.

    Rebecca was answering a call when Jessica got to her, so she waited for her to finish, even if it did mean putting up with Rebecca giving her the evil eye while she waited.

     “What can I help you with Jessica, or did you just come out to push me around a little more?” Rebecca asked with venom in her voice

     “I came to apologise for my actions this morning.” Jessica said as she fought the urge to wrap her hands around Rebecca’s throat and choke the life out of her. “I’m sorry, but I had an argument with my girlfriend last night, and she was just letting me know that she still loved me.” Jessica explained as she tried not to smirk at the look of shock on Rebecca’s face.

     “Girlfriend...? As in lover...?” Rebecca asked dumbly. “So the ‘K’ stands for...?”

     “Kirstin...” Jessica answered with a smile. “And yes, she’s my lover.” Jessica added happily.

    Jessica was expecting Rebecca to start making fun of her being a lesbian, but she didn’t, she actually started treating her like more of a friend than an enemy.

     “Have you forgiven her again now then?” Rebecca asked. “Those were a beautiful bunch of flowers she sent you.” She added, but without any sound of sarcasm in her voice.

     “Yes I forgave her.” Jessica was the one sounding dumb now. “She’s a hard girl to stay mad at.” Jessica added with a giggle.

     “I hope I get a chance to meet her one day.” Rebecca smiled.

     “I’m sure you will.” Jessica smiled back. “I’m sorry, but I better get back to Joan, I have some files to sort out for her.” Jessica explained. She didn’t really, but Rebecca’s sudden mood change towards her was a little scary.

     “Okay, I understand, but if you ever need to talk, just come and see me.” Rebecca said like they were the best of friends now. “And your secret is safe with me.” Rebecca added as she tapped her nose.

     ‘Right, I’ll believe that when I see it.’ Jessica thought to herself as she turned and made her way back to her office.

    Jessica spent the next hour sorting out some files and then double checking it all with Joan, before Joan asked her to take them to another department to get signed. Jessica could tell that Rebecca had already spread the word about her being a lesbian, because some of the guys that use to hit on her didn’t bother, and a couple of women that had never given her the time of day, now smiled at her as she passed.

     “Is everything alright sweetie?” Joan asked when Jessica returned with the signed papers, and saw the puzzled look on her face.

     “I don’t think I’ll ever understand people.” Jessica admitted.

     “And why is that?” Joan asked. “Tell you what, why don’t you make us a drink and then tell me.” Joan smiled.

    Jessica ran off to make them both a drink and was soon walking back into Joan’s office with a tray of drinks for them both.

     “Now tell me what has you so vexed.” Joan said after taking a sip from her cup.

     “Well I told Rebecca my secret, or part of it.” Jessica corrected herself. “And she started treating me nicer, and now some of the other women in the building have started talking to me as well.” Jessica said sounding confused.

     “That’s because they don’t see you as a threat anymore.” Joan giggled.

     “A threat...?” Jessica asked.

     “Yes, you look so beautiful all the time, and act so feminine to go with it, that you were being seen as a threat to the likes of Rebecca and some of the others, so I thought it about time I helped you remove that target from your back.” Joan shrugged. “Now they know that the guys don’t interest you, they can move on and be your friend, and you won’t have as many guys hitting on you either.” Joan smiled smugly.

     “Why didn’t I just tell Rebecca from the start that I was a lesbian then?” Jessica asked sounding a little angry because she’d been asked out for more drinks by the guys in the building than she could keep count of.

     “Saying anything before everyone got to know you would have just earned you a bad name, but now they all know the real you, so it’s not a big deal to them.” Joan shrugged. “I don’t pretend to understand how it all works, but it does.”

     “So I shouldn’t be mad with Rebecca for telling everyone?” Jessica asked.

     “You can be, but what’s the point? It is what we wanted after all.” Joan smirked, happy that she was able to use Rebecca’s big mouth to her advantage for once.

    They finished their drinks and then got back to work.

Chapter Twenty One: Dinner Date

    Joan drove herself and Jessica over to the restaurant where Kirstin worked on the Friday night. Jessica got the impression that Kirstin had been expecting them, because she didn’t look shocked to see them walk in, and she was grinning as she came over to greet them.

     “Why do I get the feeling you already knew we were coming?” Jessica asked as Kirstin hugged her.

     “Joan called me earlier and told me.” Kirstin grinned. “She said you’ve been a little down since we last saw each other on Wednesday.” She added with a pout.

     “I guess I have, but only because of the way I treated you.” Jessica said.

     “Well now you know that I’m fine.” Kirstin smiled as she drank in Jessica’s image. “Follow me; I have a table reserved for us.” Kirstin added as she kept hold of Jessica’s hand and led her to the table they had sat at last Friday when they ate here. Jessica was soon enjoying a nice meal and even nicer company.

     “I was speaking with Debbie yesterday, and she wants to cook dinner for us on Sunday night.” Jessica said to Kirstin and Joan. “It’s kind of a thank you for all the help we’ve given her with the babies.” Jessica explained the reason for the meal.

     “I’ve not done much, other than babysitting the other night.” Kirstin argued.

     “I think that’s the main reason for the meal. We babysat, and Mother paid for the evening out.” Jessica smiled.

     “I’ve got nothing planned, other than being with you.” Kirstin purred as she slipped her foot out her shoe and started running her toes up and down Jessica’s nylon covered leg.

    Jessica could feel herself getting turned on again, but she didn’t freak out about it this time, she just gave Kirstin a sly smile as she slipped her foot out of her shoe and started doing the same to Kirstin while they looked at each other across the table.

     “How are things with Rebecca, now she knows your secret?” Kirstin asked while they played around under the table.

     “It’s all a little creepy to tell you the truth.” Jessica admitted. “I think I liked it more when she hated me.” She added with a giggle.

     “It’s got to be easier now you’re not watching your back around her, and you did say it’s stopped a lot of the guys flirting with you.” Kirstin reminded Jessica of what she’d said the night before when they spoke on the phone.

     “True, but I’ve still got a couple of guys that think they can turn me back to the right side of the force.” Jessica grinned.

     “Not sure they would think that way if they saw your light sabre.” Kirstin giggled. Even Jessica and Joan found it funny and couldn’t help themselves giggling.

    The meal seemed to be over far too fast and it was soon time for Jessica and Joan to leave, so Kirstin could get back to work. Jessica did get a shock when Kirstin walked them to the exit and then pulled her to one side and kissed her passionately.

     “Aren’t you worried about the staff talking?” Jessica panted when Kirstin finally let her up for air.

     “They already know about us.” Kirstin smiled. “I’m far too proud to keep you a secret any longer.” Kirstin said just before she kissed Jessica again. “I love you so much Jessica.”

     “I love you Kirstin, and I always have, even when I was a sexist asshole of a male.” Jessica smirked.

    Kirstin just giggled and then kissed Jessica one last time before letting her leave with Joan.

    Joan had called and hired a car and driver to take the three of them over to Debbie’s on the Sunday night, so they could all enjoy a glass of wine and not worry about being pulled over for drunk driving.

    Kirstin stepped out of her aunt’s house when she saw the big black BMW pull up outside. Kirstin grinned as she made her way down the path to the waiting car and she could see some of the neighbour’s curtains twitching.

     “This will give the neighbours something to talk about.” Kirstin grinned as she got to the car and then slipped into the back seat with Jessica. Joan was already seated in the front with the driver.

     “Hi Kirstin, you look beautiful.” Jessica smiled, but wanted to do more than just smile at her.

     “Not as beautiful as you.” Kirstin replied as she leaned over and kissed Jessica, not bothered about the man sat behind the wheel. Kirstin only took any notice of the man driving after he almost hit a parked car and got a warning from Joan to keep his eyes on the road.

    Jessica and Kirstin thought it best to just hold hands and smile at each other after that, or risk spending some time in hospital, due to being involved in a road traffic accident.

     “I should slap both your legs for you...!” Joan said in a scolding tone once they were out the car at Debbie’s and walking up to the front door with Jessica and Kirstin both giggling like schoolgirls.

     “Sorry mother.” Jessica giggled.

     “Yes, I’m sorry as well mother.” Kirstin said just before she started giggling again.

     “I don’t see what’s so funny about almost crashing a car...” Joan said trying to keep a straight face, but even she was trying not to laugh.

    The three of them were still giggling when Paul opened the door to let them all in. “Good evening ladies.” He smiled as he stepped aside and let them enter the house. “I’d like to thank you all for the other night, and also for that wonderful meal Joan.” Paul added as he lifted Joan’s hand and kissed it.

     “No need to thank me Paul, I’m just glad I was able to help in my own little way, and there was no need for Debbie to go to all this trouble for us either.” Joan scolded him. “We brought you a couple of bottles of wine to go with the meal, I hope you don’t mind.” Joan added as she handed Paul the gift bag with the two bottles in she’d been holding in her other hand.

     “Actually it’s me going to all this trouble for you all.” Paul grinned. Debbie is busy with the babies, and thank you for the wine.” He added as he led them into the living room where Debbie was watching the twins play around on the activity mat, before he went back to the kitchen to carry on sorting out dinner.

     “Hi...!” Debbie grinned when she saw them enter the living room. She jumped to her feet and gave them all a hug.

     “Nice to see you have your man well trained Deb’s.” Joan grinned as she gave her a hug.

     “He could teach me a thing or two in the kitchen, Joan.” Debbie admitted. “He loves to impress people with his cooking; I just wish we had a bigger place to entertain.” She added with a sigh as she looked around the small living room.

     “It is a down side with these modern houses.” Joan agreed as she looked around at the tiny room.

     “Hi Deb’s.” Jessica said as she was the next to give Debbie a hug. “I’m just going to see if Paul needs any help with anything, and pour us all a glass of wine out.”

     “Yummy... Wine.” Debbie grinned. “That’s the one thing I missed while I was pregnant.” Debbie admitted.

    Jessica just giggled as she made her way into the kitchen while leaving Debbie to say hello to Kirstin. She found Paul stirring a saucepan and adding something to it as he did so.

     “Hi Paul, I just wanted to see if you needed any help with anything?” Jessica asked.

     “I’ve pretty much got it all covered, but you could sort out some wine for us all.” He smiled. The glasses are in that cupboard, and I have a bottle of wine chilling in the fridge on the top shelf.” He explained as he first pointed to a cupboard and then the fridge.

     “That I can do.” Jessica smiled as she set to work. “Debbie looks much happier now.” Jessica said as she poured the wine into the glasses.

     “She’s been her old self again since you set up that date for us Jessica; I don’t know how to thank you for doing that.” Paul sounded relieved.

     “I thought that’s what this meal was for.” Jessica laughed. “And it’s the least I could do after all the help Debbie gave me when I started working for Joan.” Jessica wanted to say for all the other things Debbie had done to help her become Jessica, but she didn’t want to make Paul hate her and then ask her to leave his house.

     “I hope this doesn’t affect your friendship with Debbie, but she told me all about Jonathon, and I just want you to know that I think you’re a really good friend to Debbie, and I don’t know what sort of a person Jonathon was, but I do like you as Jessica, and have a lot of respect for you.” Paul said.

     “You know about me, and it doesn’t bother you...?” Jessica asked sounding nervous.

     “Yes, Debbie and I don’t have any secrets from each other, and I did notice there was something different about you that first time we met, so Debbie told me all about it.” Paul shrugged like it wasn’t a big deal. “You were helping my wife to take it easy, and she found a good friend in you at the same time, so why would I mind?” Paul asked.

     “I’m not too sure, I just thought most men would be angry or something, when they found out what I was doing.”

     “I bet most would be, but I’m not most men, and to me you’re a good friend to my wife, so that makes you my friend as well.” Paul sounded proud of that fact. “So if you ever need anything, just call.” He added with a smile.

    Debbie walking into the kitchen to see where Jessica had got to with the wine, but she stopped them both from talking, as they looked in her direction.

     “I’ve told Jessica I know her secret, and I’m alright with it.” Paul said when he saw the worried look on his wife’s face.

     “I’m sorry Jess, but I thought it best I tell him rather than he find out later.” Debbie pouted as she wrapped her arms around Jessica and hugged her.

     “I don’t mind Paul knowing, it’s a relief to stop worrying around him.” Jessica giggled. “I was always worried about slipping up and making a fool of myself.” She admitted.

     “If it helps, I knew the truth, but never once saw you do anything that led me to think you were anything but a woman, and I was looking for it some of the time.” Paul smiled. “Are the twins alright...?” He asked Debbie.

     “Yes, Joan and Kirstin are keeping an eye on them so I can come and help you.” Debbie grinned. “I do love them to bits, but it’s nice to leave a room and not worry about them getting into trouble while my back is turned.”

     “Wait till they start crawling.” Jessica giggled.

     “Part of me can’t wait to see that happen, but another part is scared to death because my job will get even harder.” Debbie said looking worried.

     “That’s what you’ve got me, Kirstin and Joan for, so we can help fend off the madness.” Jessica grinned.

     “Could be a little late for that.” Paul teased. “She’s already hit danger on the crazy meter.” He added with a chuckle.

    Paul was soon regretting his comment when he came under attack from Debbie, but he won the battle and was soon holding her in his arms as he tortured her with kisses.

     “The only crazy I am, is crazy for you baby.” Debbie giggled as she let Paul hold her in his arms.

     “Good, now go and help Jessica take the wine to our other guests and let me work here.” He ordered as he let go of Debbie and spun her around to face the table where Jessica had just poured the wine into the glasses. Paul slapped Debbie on the backside, and Debbie ran over to Jessica giggling as she went.

    They each took a couple of glasses each, leaving one glass behind for Paul.

    Joan and Kirstin were both sat on the sofa with a baby each, they were making noises and the babies were cooing and giggling. Jessica smiled when she saw how good Kirstin was with Tina. Joan had Tammy in her arms.

    Jessica found herself thinking about Kirstin never being able to have children if she went forward with her plan, but at the same time Jessica couldn’t live with remaining a man just to give Kirstin children either. She knew this was all stuff she needed to talk over with a therapist and a doctor, so she wasn’t going to let it spoil her evening.

    Paul soon had the starter ready and they all sat down to eat. The twins had fallen asleep, and Debbie had put them down for a couple of hours. She had a baby monitor sat next to her, so she could go running if they woke, but it also meant she could enjoy their guests company as well.

     “This is amazing Paul.” Joan said as she ate her started.

     “Thank you Joan.” Paul smiled proudly. “I trained to be a chef, but then decided I liked to do it to relax instead of for a living, so I went back to college and trained in business instead.” He explained.

     “I’m glad you did.” Debbie grinned. “That was where we first met.” She said to the others.

     “Marrying you was the best thing I ever did.” Paul was grinning this time. “Even though we didn’t plan to start a family so soon, we wouldn’t want to change a single thing, well except maybe having a bigger home.” Paul chuckled as he looked around the small dining room they were all sat in around the dining table.

     “You only rent this place, right?” Jessica asked.

     “Yes, we were saving up to put down a deposit on a place when I got pregnant, and with me taking maternity leave, we didn’t want to risk taking on a mortgage until I was back at work.” Debbie explained. “We’re just hoping we can find a bigger place before the girls are too big.” Debbie voiced her worries.

     “You know I’ll help you were I can Deb’s” Joan tried to reassure Debbie and Paul.

     “Just knowing I have a job to come back to is a big help.” Debbie smiled.

     “I’ve been meaning to talk to you about that.” Joan said looking serious. “I’m not sure I’ll be able to give you your old job back.” Joan started to explain.

     “I won’t keep working for you, mother, if it means Deb’s losing her job.” Jessica snapped at Joan.

     “Deb’s won’t be losing her job; she’s going to be getting a promotion.” Joan said in a tone that told Jessica she should learn to keep quiet until she’s heard all the facts. “I was about to say that I want someone to help me talk to the clients, and I like the way you handle the filing, but it will mean you working for me and Debbie.” Joan warned.

     “I think I can cope with that.” Jessica grinned. “And I’m sorry for speaking out of turn to you mother.” She apologised.

     “Are you sure about this Joan?” Debbie asked, shocked that she’ll be returning to a new job and not just her old one when she finally returns to work.

     “Yes I’m more than sure Debbie.” Joan promised her. “As good as you trained Jessica here, she still lacks the knowledge that you brought to the table with you, so even though she makes a more than suitable personal secretary, Jessica will never be more than that, not without all the training that you’ve already had, and I doubt she will have the time to dedicate to doing that.” Joan explained.

     “I must admit it was nice before I broke up for my maternity leave, to focus on helping you and not worry about all the filing and phone answering.” Debbie grinned. “Are you alright with doing this Jess?” Debbie asked Jessica.

     “Yes.” Jessica grinned. “I was worried about being let go when you returned, but now I’ll have two bosses to keep me on my toes.” Jessica giggled.

     “I can’t wait to see the look on Rebecca’s face when she finds out about my new job title.” Debbie grinned a more evil grin.

     “I’m going to have the spare office next to mine converted over, so Jessica can answer calls for both of us, and vet all out visitors.” Joan explained her plan. The office isn’t as big as mine, but it’s still a good size, and no one but me will know anything about you coming back in this new role until the day you return.” Joan giggled. “I’ll let everyone think that Jessica is going to be using that office when you return to carry on your old job.”

     “This all makes me wish I was coming back to work on Monday.” Debbie pouted.

     “You’ll be back soon enough, so just make the most of your time with the little ones, and give me time to get the office sorted out.” Joan laughed at Debbie’s eagerness to get back to work. “The new job will also mean more money as well.” Joan pointed out.

     “That’s even better.” Debbie grinned. “We will finally be able to look at buying a place we can call our own.”

    They all enjoyed the rest of the meal and the babies finally woke up, so Kirstin and Jessica ended up nursing them while they had another bottle. Jessica found herself looking at Kirstin and thinking about the fact she’d make a wonderful mother, and once again Jessica wondered if she was doing the right thing claiming Kirstin for herself. Jessica forced the thoughts from her head again and enjoyed the rest of the evening, but as the evening went on, Jessica had another idea that could help Debbie and Paul, but she would need to have a word with Joan before she said anything to either of them.

    The evening finally came to an end and Joan made a call and got the driver to come and pick them up. They all said goodnight to Debbie and Paul, the twins were asleep again in their cots, and then they went out to the car and thanked the driver for getting the doors for them.

    Jessica walked Kirstin to her aunt’s front door when they got there. Then she stole a couple of kisses and wished her a good night before returning to the car so the driver could take them home.

     “Is everything alright sweetie?” Joan asked once they were back in the house. “You’ve seemed a little quiet this evening, and you’ve looked to be deep in thought for most of it as well.

     “I’m fine mother, just thinking some things over.” Jessica lied.

     “You are such a bad liar.” Joan frowned. “Now tell me what’s troubling you now?” Joan asked as she led Jessica over to the sofa and made her sit down beside her.

     “Do you think I’m being selfish...?” Jessica asked as she looked at Joan with sad eyes.

     “No...! What would make you think such a thing?” Joan asked looking shocked.

     “I was watching Kirstin this evening with Debbie’s babies, and I realised that once I’ve transitioned, I won’t be able to give her any children.” Jessica said with tears in her eyes.

     “If you asked Kirstin if she wanted children or you happy, she would choose you every time.” Joan promised. “And there is nothing to stop the two of you having some of your sperm frozen before you start on any medication.” Joan added as a thought.

     “Do you think that would work?” Jessica asked looking hopeful.

     “Some of Jane’s sisters have had children that way.” Joan said. “Cathy has a young son called Peter that was born years after she transitioned, as does a couple of her other sisters, Chrissy and Amy.” Joan grinned as she saw the shocked look on Jessica’s face.

     “How do you know all this?” Jessica asked.

     “I spoke with Chrissy’s sister, Mandy while you spent all that time on the dance floor when we were last in London.” Joan shrugged.

     “I didn’t realise you could do anything like that.” Jessica smiled now she saw some hope for them having children still.

     “And you never will if you keep everything bottled up inside like you keep doing.” Joan said in a scolding tone as she playfully slapped Jessica’s arm. “Now do you have any other problems you care to talk about?” Joan asked jokingly.

     “Actually I do have one more thing I wanted to talk to you about.” Jessica smiled.

     “And what’s got your knickers in a twist now...” Joan frowned as she wondered why Jessica didn’t look much older than she actually was with all the worrying she did.

     “I’ve been thinking about my parent’s house and what I want to do with it.” Jessica started to say.

     “I didn’t think you wanted to sell it.” Joan said remembering a conversation they had had not long after they buried Jonathon’s father.

     “At the time I didn’t, but now I think I’m ready to let the place go so to speak.” Jessica smiled.

     “Either you want to sell it or you don’t.” Joan looked confused.

     “Yes I want to sell it, but I want Debbie and Paul to buy it.” Jessica grinned. That way I know it’s going to have some good people living in it, and I can still go and visit the place from time to time.”

     “It is a nice house; it would be a shame to leave it empty while Debbie and Paul tried to save up for a place half as good.” Joan agreed.

     “I was hoping you could draw up the paperwork to keep the cost down for them, and they could move in whenever they want, even before we finalise anything.” Jessica sounded excited.

     “We need to have a word with them first, and make sure they want the place, not that I can see Debbie turning it down, it’s in a nice part of the city, and the girls will have a nice big garden to run around in when the weather is good.” Joan said as she tried to think of a down side to Jessica’s idea.

     “I was thinking we could call in on the way home from work tomorrow evening and ask them about it.” Jessica said.

    Joan and Jessica pulled up outside Debbie’s on the Monday evening and Jessica felt nervous about talking to Debbie and Paul now for some reason.

     “Do you think I’m doing the right thing mother?” Jessica asked before they got out the car. “What if they turn me down...?”

     “If they do they do, but I can’t see that happening, not once they’ve seen the place.” Joan laughed as she got out the car and walked around to help Jessica get out, not that Jessica needed any help, but Joan was sick of waiting for her to get out.

    Debbie looked a little shocked when she opened the door and found the two of them stood there smiling at her, Joan’s with a nice genuine smile and Jessica’s looking more forced. “Hi, Come in... Is everything alright?” Debbie asked looking worried.

     “Everything is fine, but Jessica and I need to have a chat with you and Paul if he’s home.” Joan asked.

     “Yes, he’s in the living room with the girls.” Debbie said still looking worried as she led them all into the living room where Paul was sat with a baby in each arm sleeping.

     “Hello Joan, Jessica.” Paul whispered when he saw them following Debbie.

     “Hi Paul.” Joan and Jessica whispered back as they gave him a little wave, not expecting one in return due to his arms being full.

    Debbie took one of the twins off Paul and then sat down next to him, so Joan and Jessica sat on the other sofa in the room and watched the happy couple nursing their children back into a deep sleep.

     “So what brings you here?” Debbie asked eager to find out the reason for their visit.

     “I’ll let you tell them, as it is your idea to help them out.” Joan said as she looked at Jessica.

    Jessica felt even more nervous now she had Debbie and Paul looking at her for an answer. “You know how I live with Joan now, well my parent’s house is sat doing nothing, and I was wondering if you’d be interested in buying the place off me?” Jessica finally got out. “I’m not looking to make the market price on the place, because that could put it out of your price range. I just want to see a happy family living in there, and I would like to come and visit the place every once in a while.” Jessica giggled nervously.

     “It is a very nice house.” Joan promised. “It has a nice big garden, but it does need a little work done to the place, due to Jessica’s father being too ill to maintain the place towards the end.” Joan explained.

     “I hope you understand if we don’t just jump at the chance before we’ve seen the place, but yes we are interested if it’s as good as Joan says.” Debbie replied after looking at Paul and getting a nod from him.

     “I wasn’t expecting an answer right away.” Jessica laughed. “I’ll leave you a set of keys and the address, as well as the code to turn off the alarm system. Please take as much time as you need, and call in whoever you want to check the place out.” Jessica said as she pulled out an envelope with a set of keys and a card with the address and a code on it.

    Jessica and Joan left after that, so they could go home and sort out some dinner before relaxing for the rest of the night.

    Jessica was busy filing some paperwork on the Tuesday afternoon when she heard the cooing sound of a baby behind her and she turned around to find Debbie and Paul stood there grinning at her, each of them holding a baby in their arms.

     “Hi...!” Jessica grinned as she ran over to kiss the babies on the forehead before hugging Debbie and just smiling at Paul, still not use to the correct way to greet a male friend. “What brings the two of you here?” Jessica asked.

     “We went to look at your parent’s house.” Debbie said looking a little sad.

     “Did you not like it?” Jessica asked. “I know it’s not the best house on the market, but I thought you could turn it into something really special.” Jessica tried a sales pitch on them.

     “Jess, it’s a really nice house, but a little out of our price range.” Debbie stopped her. “The bank would never agree to loan us the money to buy a place like that.” Debbie explained as she went in her purse and pulled out the keys and handed them back to Jessica.

     “Then pay me what you can afford.” Jessica said in a stubborn tone as she thrust the keys back into Debbie’s hands.

     “Jess...! Get real; you can get a lot of money for that house.” Debbie argued as she tried to make Jessica take the keys back.

     “My parent’s left me that house, as well as a tidy little sum of money, so whatever I make off the house is a bonus, and I want the two of you and those two little angels to have that house at a price you can afford to pay me.” Jessica had a pleading in her voice.

    Debbie looked at Paul and they spoke to each other with their eyes for a couple of minutes before they both nodded and then they looked at Jessica again. “Alright, we’ll have a word with the bank and see what kind of a mortgage they will give us, and we’ll let you know.” Debbie agreed as she went to give Jessica the keys back again.

     “Keep them, the house is going to be yours soon enough.” Jessica smirked. “I’ll just need to clear some of the personal stuff out, but I’ll let you pick through the furniture and keep the stuff you like.” Jessica added.

     “You can be really stubborn at times.” Debbie grumbled, but she put the keys back in her purse.

    Debbie and Paul spoke with the bank and they managed to get a mortgage for two hundred and fifty thousand, which they accepted and signed off on. Joan sorted out all the legal stuff and then Jessica signed over the house once the money had been transferred into her bank account.

    Jessica still managed to shock Debbie and Paul though when she handed them back twenty thousand pounds for them to do the place up after she found out from Joan that they had given her all the money they had because they thought she was giving the house away at the price they offered.

    Paul and Debbie tried refusing the money, but Jessica wasn’t going to take no for an answer and even threatened them with going to the bank and drawing the money out in cash and giving it to them that way.

     “Alright, we’ll except the money, but only under one condition.” Paul said after he and Debbie had been talking in another room of their new home for some time.

     “Name it.” Jessica said suspiciously.

     “Paul and I want you and Kirstin to be god parents to Tina and Tammy.” Debbie grinned.

     “Is that it...?” Jessica asked; as she was expecting something far worse, she didn’t even see this request as being bad at all.

     “Is it a yes then?” Paul asked with a smirk.

     “Yes it’s a yes silly.” Jessica giggled.

    She was soon being hugged by Paul and Debbie, while Joan and Kirstin kept an eye on the twins in another room.

     “Thank you for doing all this for us Jess. “Debbie said with tears in her eyes.

     “I just wanted the place to go to a good family, and I know it has now.” Jessica smiled as she had tears of her own threatening to come out.

     “You’re welcome to come here anytime you want to Jessica.” Paul snuffled as he was overcome with it all as well. “And I can entertain even better now I have that wonderful big kitchen to play around in.” He chuckled.

     “Am I invited to join you?” Jessica giggled.

     “I’d be disappointed if you didn’t.” Paul said looking shocked that Jessica could ask such a stupid question.

    Part of Jessica was sad to be letting the place go, but a larger part was glad she’d found someone so special to take over the place, and Debbie and Paul still felt like family to her, so she wasn’t to broken up about the place not belonging to her anymore.

 

To Be Continued Next Friday  

 

Story by SaraUK

 

Edited and Posted by SamanthaK

    EDITORS NOTE: Please Comment and/or leave Kudos and let Sara know you like her work please, Any comments on spelling, grammar or the layout of the story please PM me “Samanthak” not Sara. Thank you

    Authors Note: Cathy, Jane and all the others that Jessica and Joan meet while down in London, are all characters I wrote about in my; You Have it all Wrong series. Even thought you don’t hear about Jane’s story until book four ‘You have it all Wrong Four, the Kids Story’ the time line for this story is set between book three and book four. So to find out more about Chrissy, Amy and Cathy, and how they all became the women they are in this story, you will need to go back and read them.

    Hugs

    SaraUK