Tracy lay back slowly, a look of confusion all over her face. “Water.” She said in a raspy voice. Conner held up a glass with a straw and he let Tracy take a drink. Then he pulled it away in mid drink. She tired to follow the straw, but he held her back again.

“She's with Modine in the cafeteria. She needed a break. We've been taking turns with you and Modine.” He said, then he sighed. “Tell me Troy, what do you remember?”

December 2nd 1982
Oroville Hospital

Tracy awoke in a room that wasn't hers, nor was it her grandmothers guest bedroom. One eye opened, then the second one opened up, but some hair was covering her eyes and her vision seemed to be a bit hazy. She reached one hand up to investigate and immediately felt something on her wrist. She brushed her hair aside and found the vision problems were still there a little. “What the heck?” Her voice was rough and groggy and her throat was dry. She looked around the room and realized she was in a hospital. Then her gaze fell on a figure she never thought she'd see sitting by a hospital bed. At least not for her.

Conner opened up his eyes from his nap as he heard his grandchild moving around and he leaned forward, gently putting a hand against the young child's chest to keep her on the bed. “Don't move. You don't need to put any pressure on the site.” He said in a soft tone. “The doctors say you're in bed for at least a day.” As she lay back on the bed, she realized that there was a growing pain in her chest and she wasn't going to complain.

Tracy lay back slowly, a look of confusion all over her face. “Water.” She said in a raspy voice. Conner held up a glass with a straw and he let Tracy take a drink. Then he pulled it away in mid drink. She tired to follow the straw, but he held her back again.

“Sorry, but the nurse said you could drink a little when you woke, but they want to check on you before you have too much.”

His grandchild moaned, but she lay back again and looked at the other side of the bed, then back at her grandfather. “Mom isn't here?”

“She's with Modine in the cafeteria. She needed a break. We've been taking turns with you and Modine.” He said, then he sighed. “Tell me Troy, what do you remember?”

She was starting to hate being called that, but she was in no shape to correct him. “I was in the fields walking, I think...yeah. Then I decided to go to the house.” Tracy sat there, letting the memories come slowly back. “Bruce was outside with Frankie and two other kids. They......” Her face darkened and she looked away. She could recall the sound of the fabric being cut and the tone of Bruce's voice. She didn't want to relive that, not at the current moment at least. “They chased me, I ran for my house, but they beat me there and then I ran for your place, but they caught me.” A tear formed in her eye.

“Take your time.” Conner said, then he placed a gentle hand on Tracy's. That caused the child to look even more confused.

She took a breath and continued with her memories. “They started hitting me.....” She sat there, shaking her head. “I don't remember anything else. What happened? Why am I here?”

Conner moved his seat with one hand so he could face Tracy, but his other hand held onto the child. “Troy, or is it Tracy.” He sighed. He nodded to himself. Modine had told him how to deal with this and he had already failed. “Tracy, I got a few things I need to say, and I'll try and help fill in the blanks for you, okay?”

Tracy nodded, unsure what to do now that he was using her female name. “Yeah.”

“I know you know that I know about the dresses and stuff.” He said. Tracy just nodded. “At first I was angry. All my life I've thought that men who wear dresses were weak. I know I've been a jerk to you for years, just because you're not like most boys your age. I was so afraid that my Grandson, the good one mind you, was going to become a fag that I started to hate you.” He wiped a few tears out of his eyes and shook his head.

“I even talked to your father about it after you got back from Livermore and he defended you. I was going to find a way to make a man out of you, somehow. But then I watched you being attacked.” Conner stopped and a chill ran up Tracy's spine. “Troy...sorry. Tracy, you may not remember, but one of those boys hurt your grandmother. I was already running to get to you, but I wasn't going to make it in time...” He turned away for a moment, wiping at his eyes once more. He slowly looked back, his eyes showing more sadness then she had even seen. “Where they hurt you, most guys wouldn't have been able to stand for hours. I know that from personal experience. But you found the strength to stand up. Hell, you still fought.”

He looked in Tracy's eyes and gave a sad smile. “I learned something yesterday. I should have know it all these years, but I learned it for the first time yesterday. You judge a man......or woman, by what's inside, not the cover. You were hurt and you still were ready to protect your grandmother. By all rights, you shouldn't have even been standing when you were. So I don't care what you want to be in life, boy, girl, man or woman. You proved yourself to me yesterday. You're the type of person I wish I could be.” He gave Tracy's hand a light squeeze. “No matter how you dress. I just hope you can forgive me for all the years that I've been a hateful jackass to you.”

“I can Grandpa.” Tracy squeezed his hand back.

“There's the man I married.” A soft voice called from the doorway, causing both Tracy and her grandfather to turn and look. There in a wheelchair sat Modine, a cast on one arm and a large bandage on her cheek. Maggie was behind her and wheeled the older woman in. Conner bent down to kiss his wife as she stopped at Tracy's bedside.

“Grandpa, you said they hurt me?” Tracy asked, she was trying to make her mind work, but the drugs for the pain was proving a great hindrance. “Where?”

“I......” Conner replied. He rested in his seat and began to cry, thinking about all the hassles he had given the child and all the troubles his life had in store for him now.

“Grandpa, how bad is it.” Tracy asked, but Conner didn't reply. Instead the next voice she heard was her Grandmothers.

“I'll never lie to you. It was bad, Sweetie.” She put a hand over his and gave it a light squeeze. “They broke a rib or two and you got a massive bruise on your face, possible damage to the eye. Your wrist is possibly sprained. They also...” She shook her head and turned away for a moment.

She heard movement from the door and looked to see, through his blurry vision that was slowly getting better, her father walking in. “Sweetie....” Maggie began to tear up as she moved to the seat on Tracy's other side. “They had to remove a testicle. Those boys had hurt you so bad, there was no saving it.” She began to sob and William moved to put an arm around her.

“But don't I have one left?” She asked, having very limited knowledge of the human anatomy. Everything she had learned so far had come from a health book her mother had, that and the magazines and books that William thought he had hidden from two nosy children. Their school only taught sex education to the eighth grade. She failed to think about the benefits for Tracy through this event. Her thoughts were coming slow, mainly from the drugs, but as she sat there, she became aware of a pain down there, starting off slow and gradually building up.

“No.” William replied. He locked his jaw so he couldn't burst into tears. “When you were born there was a problem and one was removed before you were a year old.”

“Oh.” Was the only reply that Tracy could come up with.

“Ah, I see our young hero is awake.” A woman in a nurses uniform walked in with a clipboard in hand.

“What? Hero?” Tracy asked trying to sit up slightly. “I'm no hero.”

“I beg to differ.” The woman smiled. “You defended your grandmother when you were hurt. You put yourself in harms way to protect another. That's a hero in my book.” She stepped closer to the bed.

Tracy smiled at her and lay back in the bed. “Who are you?”

“I'm your nurse, well one of several. I'm Carly. I need to check you out and make sure your feeling better. Is that okay with you?”

“We'll be outside.” Conner said as he moved to to wheel his wife out of the room.

“You need us here?” William asked Tracy.

“If you can?” Tracy looked from William to her mother to the nurse

“It's fine.” Carly replied. “Due to the nature of the injuries, It may be better if you stay for the first few check ups.” She pulled a curtain around so it blocked the bed from the door.

“I can do that.” Maggie replied. “I was able to get a few days off of work.”

“How long have I been here?” Tracy asked.

“Well it's only eight in the morning now. You came in yesterday afternoon and you've been sleeping since the surgery.” Maggie replied.

“What about school?” Tracy looked from her Mom to her Dad.

“I called them a few minutes ago. They know where you are and that it may be a couple of days till you get released. Vance will bring your homework with him today when he's done.” Maggie replied.

“Oh.” She relaxed a bit.

“Okay kiddo, I need to check on the dressings, so don't worry, okay?” The nurse said.

“Okay.” She lay her head back as she felt the sheet being lifted. She didn't want to get into the whole Tracy or Troy mess with the hospital. She blushed as she felt a pair of hands touching her in places that a limited few had touched, most of them were either medical professionals or family. Then something occurred to her.

“Mom?” She asked, her voice trembling from fear. “Um....”

“What is it?” Her mother asked, moving a bit closer and lowering her voice.

“Does everyone know what I was wearing yesterday afternoon?” Tracy asked, fear embedded in her voice.

“Yes.” Maggie replied with a slight nod.

“People are gonna find out...I'm dead.” She began to hyperventilate in the bed.

Carly pulled the sheet back over her and looked to the young kid in the bed as she pulled off a pair of gloves. “Relax. Start breathing slower.” Her voice was firm, but soothing. “I need you to breathe slower. Do as I say now. Breathe in and hold. Till I say release.”

Tracy breathed in and Carly held up one finger, then a second. “Release but don't breath in till I tell you.” Tracy let it out and Carly stood there, watching and holding up one finger, then the next. “Now breath in and hold it for a count of three.”

Tracy followed her orders and the process took several minutes, until her breathing was slowed. Carly put a hand on Tracy's shoulder. “As for what you were wearing, we're all under doctor patient confidentiality. That means we can't tell anyone about anything without the threat of a major law suit. So your secret is safe here. None of us will treat you different due to a simple change of clothes.”

“Really?” Tracy asked, not sounding at all convinced.

“I promise, none of us will say a word.” Carly held up a blood pressure cuff. “Now relax, 'cause I need to do a couple more tests, okay?”

“Okay.” Tracy said and lay back on the bed, looking to her parents.

“It's gonna be okay.” Maggie tired to reassure her.

“What if that other kid says anything?” Tracy looked at her mom, her breaths were beginning to pick up their pace again.

“Now enough of that.” Carly said in a firm tone while giving her a stare. “Breathe slowly or we make you go to sleep, got it?”

“Sweetie, Bruce, Frankie and that Kenny kid are in juvenile hall. They all had prior records an were on some form of probation. There may be a court case, but don't worry about that or them, they're all gone for now. “

“No. There was a fourth kid.” Tracy replied. “They caught me in the field, there was a guy who tried to stop Bruce, but I don't know his name.”

“A fourth?” William looked to his wife, hints of worry flashed across his face. “Does he go to school with you?”

“Yeah.” Tracy nodded.

“What are you thinking Will?” Maggie asked.

“The cops said it's a cut and dried case. It's already looking good for her. I mean they attacked her and Mom on the property, without being invited. They could have killed both of them, so yeah...” William replied. “But this fourth kid. That could cause problems for Tracy...um Troy at school.”

Maggie nodded and thought about it. “Baby, if we managed to get copies of the school pictures, could you point out this boy?”

“I think so?” Tracy nodded.

“I'm on it.” William bent down and kissed his child’s forehead. “You hang tough and you should be out shortly.”

“Thanks Dad.” She watched as he walked around the curtain and could hear him walking out the door.

“Tracy?” Carly asked, this caused Tracy to look at her. “I think it's a beautiful name. I got to admit, when you first came up, I thought you were a girl, till I heard what the injuries were. That and the confusion on the paperwork.”

Maggie blushed. “Sorry, I was a bit preoccupied.”

“It's fine. No one expects to go to the ER. It's not something you can plan for.” Carly replied, then she looked at the child in the bed. “Tell you what, when it's just you and I, I'll call you Tracy, but only if you want.”

Tracy thought about it for a moment, then nodded. “Yeah, I'd like that.”

“Well then Tracy.” She paused as the young girl in the bed beamed at her. “I'll let the doctor know you're awake. She'll be in to check you out soon, okay?”

“Okay.” Tracy nodded.

“Well, I need to get going, but after the doctor sees you, we'll see about getting some liquids in your before you can have anything to eat.”

"Cool." Tracy watched Carly open up the curtain and walk out. “Mom, what do we do now?”

“We take things one step at a time.” Maggie replied. “That's all we can do.”

Tracy sat there in her bed less then half an hour later. The door had been shut this time to keep the doctors voice from traveling into the hall. Only Maggie was in the room with her, but at least someone was there for her. She was feeling a bit uncomfortable as the doctor poked and prodded at the incision site. Finally the doctor stood up. “I know your mother explained what we had to do, I wasn't going to cover it again, but I felt you needed to know.” She pulled up a chair and sat next to Tracy. “There was a lot of damage to the one remaining testicle. There was no way to save it. There was also some tissue damage to the penis, but with time, we feel that will heal.”

She looked down to see that Tracy had looked down and was blushing a bright red. “Sorry to embarrass you with this, but you do need to know, it is your body.” She smiled gently at the girl in the bed. “With the nature of the surgery we have a few rules that you need to follow. First is no heavy lifting for a couple of weeks. I'll set the limit at five pounds for now. We'll have a follow up appointment in a couple of weeks to see how you're healing. Second is that you'll need to move around a bit. Limit climbs up the stairs to two trips a day for the first week.”

Tracy nodded as the Doctor continued. “Starting tomorrow we'll have you walk the halls. Due to your other injuries, we'll be keeping you in bed one more night. When you sit, no crossing your legs. Sit with legs open. And most importantly. No driving for a week.”

Tracy chuckled. “I can't drive yet.”

“Well, don't pick this week to learn. That can wait a week.” The doctor joked again. “I've got a list of other things but your mother can hold on to those. Normal things, no pushing yourself. If it hurts, stop doing it.”

“Okay.” Tracy nodded. “Um...I was wondering....” Her gaze fell and she found it hard to maintain eye contact with the doctor.

“She's worried about what she was wearing when she came in. The nurse tried to reassure her, but she's worried.” Maggie supplied.

“Ah. I see.” The Doctor stood up and looked down at her young patient. “I don't mind what you were wearing, and we can't divulge that information with anyone. So don't worry.”

“Thank you.” Tracy replied, though she didn't believe her too much.

“But as your doctor, it is my job to help as best as I can.” She looked to Maggie. “Has he been wearing girls clothes much?” When neither Maggie or Tracy replied, she added. “Any thing you say doesn't leave this room.”

“Yeah.” Maggie finally replied. “She..I mean he wants to be a girl.”

“I see.” She pulled out a small tablet and scribbled down a number, then handed it to Maggie. “This is the number for a friend of mine in Chico. Give her a call, she a psychologist who deals with these gender issues a lot and she may be able to help you out.

Maggie began to chuckle. “Actually, I've already called. We got the number from a referral in the Bay Area.

“Makes sense, she did live there for a while.” The doctor smiled. “Well, we'll make sure that the nurses get some clear liquids in here for you. When you can keep those down, we'll move to food. No soda for a few days I'm afraid.”

“Awww.” Tracy slumped back into her bed. “I wanted a grape soda.”

“Sorry, but the more you listen, the sooner you get better.” The doctor replied. “I'll be in tomorrow to check on you, but if something comes up, let the nurse know and they can contact me.”

“Okay, we will.” Maggie replied. She watched the Doctor head for the door. “Well, that went well.” She said, turning back to her daughter.

“Yeah.” Tracy faced her mother as she lay there, then in a quiet voice, she asked. “Mom? Was I stupid for going outside like I did?”

“I don't think so baby. They were there either way. They started something, they may have if you were Troy at the time.” Maggie replied. She had seen her daughters shirt, the clean cut up the middle and the cut along the skirt. She had an idea what almost happened, but she didn't want to bring it up. Tracy was going to have enough of a hard time to deal with.

“I just feel stupid for it.” Tracy shook her head. “So totally stupid.”

“It's okay kiddo. We all make mistakes, and no one could have expected Bruce to be on the property.” Maggie handed her daughter a cup with a straw. “No one could have known he'd attack you there.”

“What about school?” Tracy asked. “What if that kid talks?” She took a drink and lay her head back

“Honey, we'll fight this one battle at a time. But if he said anything, it could go bad for him too. He was there as well.” Maggie said.

“What do you mean?” Tracy sat up slightly, till pain danced across her chest and she lay back.

“Think of it this way. Three boys attacked you. If he was there, he's at least an accessory. That means he had a part in it and is just as guilty.” Maggie replied. “So he may not call any attention to himself.”

“And if he says anything?” Tracy looked at her mother.

“Then we handle it legally. That's all we can do.” Maggie said as she gripped her daughters hand gently.