"We have an appointment with Rev Trent before Church," I said lamely, trying to stifle a yawn.

Keith pressed a few buttons on his PDA and said, "Now the appointment is after church. You will see Dr Ruiz after breakfast."

The others looked on, not saying anything. It was very clear that we were in hot water.

After breakfast, with whispers of 'good luck' still ringing in our ears, we made our way slowly to Rachel's office. Before we knocked on the door, Christopher leaned across and gave me a kiss and squeezed my hand.

"Just be truthful," I suggested.

"I will," Christopher replied. "I think that’s a good idea."

"Enter," the brisk response came, after we knocked.

We entered, our hands firmly clasped together, ready to face our fate. Mr Hobson was sat next to Rachel, behind her desk.

"Please sit opposite us," said Rachel. There was no sitting in the nice comfortable settee, but we were told to sit in what looked like rather stiff chairs.

"To start with, I'd like to thank you David, for the way you handled yourself yesterday. Rachel was able to chat with Ms Toms and start more of the healing process. It seems she'd been bottling up her grief. Yesterday triggered the start of the release and once started takes a life of its own. Ms Toms will be having some time off work, so she can come to terms with her loss. Dr Ruiz will be there for her when needed, but probably more of a friend rather than a counsellor.

"Ms Toms never put me in any danger," I said, trying to defend Julia. "She became upset at times, but always made sure I was safe. Even on the way back when she was at her worst, she made sure that I wasn't upset with my plane journey. Yesterday was my first flights and Ms Toms made sure I was comfortable and calmed my nerves at every stage."

"I'm glad to hear it," said Mr Hobson. "And your praise of Ms Toms is noted. However, Ms Toms isn't in trouble; she is just being made aware that there are times where she should ask for help."

I was glad that Julia was okay and it had taken my mind off the reason we were summoned. I wasn't to escape from that for long.

"Christopher and David, on the first day at the school you were told certain school rules. One of those rules was that you had to keep your underwear on when alone. Did you break that rule?"

"Yes," I replied, my head lowered in shame.

"Oh. Did you have sex?"

"Not really."

Rachel and Mr Hobson looked at each other in a quizzical manner. I don't think I'd been very clear and they were trying to understand what I meant.

"Did you, or did you not engage in sexual intercourse?" bristled Mr Hobson.

"If you mean, did David stick his thing into me, then no, we didn't," said Christopher, gently squeezing my hand.

"I think I can handle it from here," said Rachel who had been watching us like a hawk.

"Yes, it only looks like a minor issue compared to what was estimated," agreed Mr Hobson. "Unless anything else comes up, your punishment will be a lot lighter than it would have been. I am ordering the interconnecting door sealed for two nights. Unless there is an emergency, you are not to set foot in each others rooms. Is that clear?"

"Yes Sir," we said quietly in unison.

"I am quite disappointed in you both. You are both year leaders as well as getting involved in other activities. You are expected to set an example to others in your year. I know you’re only thirteen so I'm making allowances, but please try to keep to the rules; it is less painful for us all."

"Yes Sir," we both said, feeling chastised.

Mr Hobson got up and left us both alone with Rachel who said, "Okay, now we are alone, let's discuss last night. Christopher, how far did things go?"

"We spent the night cuddling, kissing and stroking each other. I suppose we were exploring each other," replied a very red faced Christopher. I was glad Rachel had asked Christopher as I was about to explode with embarrassment. I just wanted the ground to open up and swallow me.

"So you got involved in some heavy petting," she said as if she heard these things every day. "Did David just kiss you on the mouth or other parts of your body?"

"Other parts," replied a mortified Christopher.

"Including your genitalia?"

"Please stop," I pleaded. "Don't we have a right to privacy?"

"Yes you do, when you don't break the rules. Now, did David kiss you on your genitalia?"

"Yes," said Christopher reluctantly. "He also licked me down there."

"Did you enjoy it?"

I couldn't believe that Rachel was asking such questions, but Christopher was obviously remembering last night as a big grin came on his face. Rachel didn’t say anything but continued to scribble notes on her pad. At no point did her expression change.

"It's approaching time for Church, which I understand you both attend. After your meeting with Rev Trent, I would like a chat with David. Christopher, while I'm chatting with David I'd like you to go and see Dr Sue.”

"Yes Miss," we both said and fled from her office as quickly as we could. I don't think I'd ever been so embarrassed.

"Are you okay?" Christopher asked me as we walked towards the chapel.

"I think so," I replied. "How could she ask such questions without batting an eyelid?"

"Must be her job. I suppose she’s trained to remain unemotional."

"Detached is the word."

"How do you know?"

"When I worked out Rachel was a psychiatrist, I read up on what they do. Very interesting subject."

"You're nuts," was all Christopher said as we slipped into the school chapel.

Jill and Anna had been to church since they'd joined the school, but none of the other year one student had. Today was an exception as they were all there.

"Are you okay?" asked Paula.

"We're fine," I answered quietly. "Rachel thought we'd had sex, so was on the warpath."

"Didn't you?" asked a surprised Brian.

"No we didn't, though we did come close. We did break one rule though, so we do have a punishment. Our interconnecting doors are sealed for two nights. Rachel has scheduled appointments for me to see her and Christopher to see Dr Sue, so we won't be around till lunch."

The vicar arrived and we all rushed to be seated. The extra pupils didn't escape the notice of the vicar who said, "We normally only get a full house at Christmas, so it's nice that we have new faces today. I hope you enjoy the service and come again."

The service was bright, cheerful and uplifting, just as it usually was. I'd not been brought up in a family that attended church and I think they would’ve been quite surprised at me attending each Sunday. In fact they'd probably be very surprised at a lot of things that I got up to at this school.

After the service the vicar always hung around the back of the church to speak with any of the children that wanted a quick chat. Christopher and I chatted with the others from our year while we waited. Gradually the students from the other years drifted away and the vicar came across.

"It’s really good to see how the students standby each other in times of need. The sense of community is something that a lot of vicars miss. I have it in bucket loads. I'm aware some of you came to support David and Christopher and might not be back. That’s fine, but remember you’re always welcome and if any of you want a private chat then I'm usually available. But that's enough of the sales pitch. You two finish up with your friends and meet me when you’re ready in my office."

"He seems really cool," remarked Emma as the vicar disappeared. "I used to go to church with my elder sister and her daughter. The vicar there used to be nice and I was always worried that it wouldn't be as nice here."

"Hey, I don't mind going with you," said Paula.

"The vicar will be pleased to have more students listening to him. Perhaps we ought to get into trouble more often," I laughed.

"Not a chance," said Christopher. "I don't want to go through that interrogation again. At least I get to see nice Dr Sue. You have to have more time being asked embarrassing questions."

"Don't remind me," I said, the smile quickly disappearing from my face. "Anyway, let's go and see what the vicar wants, so we can finish off the other stuff before lunch. I'd hate to miss my Sunday roast."

"You've been coming to the church for over a month. How are you finding it?" asked the vicar when we’d settled in his office.

"I feel very comfortable with a lot of it, but there’s a lot I don't understand. There was mention last week about the Holy Trinity."

"That's very understandable as you don’t have a lot of the background. I've been thinking about running a Youth Alpha course, which explains and discusses things like that. It's especially geared to children aged eleven to eighteen, so it will be brilliant for you."

"What about kids like me who've been going to church a lot?" Christopher asked.

"Some use it as a type of confirmation class. To make sure that confirmation is what they want."

"I'm not even baptised, let alone do confirmation classes," I laughed.

"You aren't the first person that isn’t baptised. Is it something you would like?

"Probably, but I'd like to do the course and see how I get on. It won't stop me being able to come to church, will it?"

"Of course not. I think it's wonderful that you are thinking about things so rationally. It's rare that an adult thinks things through, let alone a child. I wasn't trying to pressure you, just make sure that you were happy."

"I don't think I've ever been happier. Not just with the church, but with school and my life."

"I'm glad, but never forget your roots. They are very important in who you are. You are growing and finding your own feet, but your parents are who helped you become the person you are today. They are the ones that taught you to talk, read and gain the personality have. You are both very special children and if you need anybody to talk to, not just about religious things, then I'm here."

"Thanks," Christopher and I said together.

By the time I made my way to Rachel's office, we'd chatted with the vicar for a good half hour. As I knocked on her door my stomach gave little flips

Rachel popped her head round the door. "Can you please wait a few minutes," requested Rachel.

"Sure," I replied and she closed the door behind her.

Those five minutes felt like five hours. I stood there waiting, the butterflies in my stomach gradually getting worse. Thoughts flashed through my mind about what awful punishment she was concocting while I waited. It was just over eight minutes when the door swung open and a very happy Stacy walked out followed by Andy, who looked almost as happy.

"Your turn," she said. If her face lit up any further you would see her glow for miles.

I didn't get chance to ask her what her obvious good news was before I was being ushered into the room. This time I was offered a seat on the settee rather than the stiff chairs.

"Is Stacy okay?" I asked as I sat down.

"Oh yes, she is just very happy with what I just told her. I'm sure the reason will become obvious over the next few weeks, so no prying."

"Yes Rachel. Why did you want to see me without Christopher?"

"A good question. How are you finding it back as David?"

"It's great."

"Are you enjoying it?"

"Oh yes."

"That’s great to hear. Now about last night-"

I screwed up my eyes trying to block out the expected telling off. It didn't come. Instead she waited till I peeped out.

"I take it that Christopher-"

"It was definitely Helen and not Christopher last night."

"You are aware that they are the same person, don't you?"

"They might be the same physical person, but they do act differently."

"Okay, we'll discuss that another time. I take it that Helen tried to initiate having sex?"

"It takes two people to have sex, not one. We were pleased to see each other. Helen had been worried about me and was relieved. One thing just led to another. We didn't do it on purpose."

"I know you didn't," reassured Rachel. "But that is how unplanned pregnancies can occur."

"Oh."

"But you didn’t have sex. Why?"

"Because I nearly puked," I blurted out really not wanting to discuss it.

"So this was worse than when you were just excited?"

All I could do was nod. Just the memory of my feelings made me feel ill. From nowhere Rachel pulled out a biscuit tin, took off the lid and offered it to me. I peered inside and took a ginger biscuit.

"Just nibble it," suggested Rachel.

"Thanks. Is there something wrong with me?"

"You are just you. People react differently to all sorts of situations. Sure, this is unusual and a bit extreme, but I wouldn't worry about it as I doubt you will try to have sex again, will you?!"

"No, Dr Ruiz,” I quickly replied. Rachel didn’t look too sure though.”

"So what was Helen's reaction when you stopped?"

"She saw how ill I looked and she stopped me. She made me put back on my underwear so I couldn't see myself or do anything that would cause me issues."

"Then she begged you to continue?"

"No. I decided to do what I did. Helen had looked after me over her own fun. I just wanted to do something that would show her how grateful I was."

"The rules are there to protect you," sighed Rachel. "You are already being punished for breaking the rules, so I don't need to elaborate any further."

"Yes, miss."

"Would you like to talk about it more now, or would you like to wait till tomorrow?"

"Do I have to? I know what I did was wrong. I don’t really want to discuss it anymore."

"I'm talking about your reaction, not what happened. What you did was wrong, but I'm sure that you will break the rules again; it is very difficult to stop things like that when you have enjoyed yourselves so much."

"But it won't happen again," I pleaded, not really wanting to discuss it. “How can you say I liked it, I was nearly ill.”

“True, but you liked pleasing Helen and you saw how much she liked what you did. Can you promise me faithfully that you’ll never do it again?”

I opened my mouth but nothing came out.

"So I take that as a tomorrow then. Say at eleven?"

I just nodded, resigned in the knowledge that this was a fight I was going to lose.

"Would you prefer it to be alone, or would you like Christopher to be with you?"

"Christopher to be with me. I have no secrets from him. I'll be telling him all about our chat anyway."

"Good. I'm glad you have learnt that lesson well. So I'll see you both at eleven tomorrow."

I walked out of her room and after closing the door breathed a sigh. It hadn't been an easy session and I wasn't looking forward to tomorrow. Christopher, I noted after doing a special lookup on the PDA, was in the common room. Sunday lunch was rapidly approaching and I was glad that my chat didn't make me miss that. You'd think that nearly six weeks at the school I'd be used to the food, but not yet in my case. The thought of roast lamb made my mouth water. I was too late to chat in private with Christopher and all we could do was reassure each other that we were both okay.

Before lunch started Mr Hobson rose to his feet and said, “I’m overjoyed to announce an affirmation ceremony between Fran and Ingrid is to take place in two weeks time. If any of you know any reason why this should not happen then you have a week to let me know. Are there any open objections now?”

There was a pause where not a sound could be heard. After about ten seconds, which to the happy couple must have felt a lot longer, Mr Hobson continued, “Excellent, now if year five can do the honours.”

I sat back and watched as the eight eldest students made their way to the kitchen area and returned with flutes half full of champagne, which were quickly distributed. I saw the confused look on others in our year and realised that most didn’t understand what was happening.

“Only one member of Fran and Ingrid’s official party has so far been decided, so I ask the head bridesmaid to do the toast.”

Stacy stood with a big grin plastered over her face, “This has been the first time I’ve ever been asked to be a bridesmaid, let alone head bridesmaid, so I wish to thank both Fran and Ingrid for giving me the honour. Would everybody please stand and raise their glasses to Fran and Ingrid and hope their Search of Finding is a lot less ‘fun’ than when I did it. To Fran and Ingrid.”

“To Fran and Ingrid,” echoed the response.

“From the blank looks on a few of your faces, I’d say that a few things need explaining,” I said as we started our meal.

“You mean you understood that?” asked Jessica.

“The affirmation ceremony is where the two students commit themselves to each other. Rather like a wedding. Obviously they can’t be legally married due to age and potentially gender — I’ve no idea of Fran or Ingrid’s birth sex.”

“How did you find this out?” asked Sam.

“Do you remember when Tim and Andrea showed us round the school, well I found out they had the same surname and I asked. The Search of Finding sounds like something they have to do, rather like some of the tasks in a Hindu wedding. Perhaps Keith could explain?”

“You and Christopher never cease to amaze me,” laughed Keith who had been listening to our conversation.

“Huh?”

“The affirmation ceremony is something the school holds very dearly and is not written about anywhere. It is not something that a student would reveal unless very specifically queried about. Anyway the Search of Finding is something they will do. It is a way for them to show that the hearts and desires of there partner is more important than their own. What happens is a closely guarded secret, so anybody taking part can’t have prior knowledge and enter the task blind.”

“Is it dangerous?” asked Paula.

“Of course not. Remember one of the priorities of the school is to look after the welfare of their students. Okay, sorry David and Christopher for picking on you, but it's one of the joys of being year leaders. David, do you love Christopher?”

“Yes, of course.”

“Prove it.”

I opened my mouth to say something, but I quickly closed it. I knew my feelings of both Christopher and Helen, heck they were the same person. How could I prove it to others? Giving chocolates, flowers, kisses or cuddles were just a way of expressing feelings, but not proof. What happened last night was a physical thing and although pleasurable is just that.

“I don’t know how to. There are tokens of love, like flowers, but anybody could send flowers, they aren’t proof.”

“What about how you put your partner before yourself?” offered Anna.

“Perhaps,” nodded Keith, “but what about a soldier putting his live to save others? He is doing it as a sense of duty, not for love. Anyway, I don’t want someone killing themselves to prove love.”

“So this Search of Finding is a way to prove that they love each other?”

“No, not really, it sort of goes beyond that. By the time you're ready for such a commitment you'll know how deeply and how much you love each other. No, it is about possibly finding out something new about each other and cementing the love and commitment. I know I’m being vague, but that is deliberate because you won’t find out until it is something you do.”

As we finished lunch Sam said, “I need to take some books back to the library. I know we all planned to watch that sci-fi series that Jessica found on the system. Is there any chance we can delay thirty minutes?”

“I have some stuff to do as well,” said Emma. “Why don’t we do our own stuff and get together in thirty minutes?”

Christopher and I quickly disappeared outside and decided to walk along one of the paths away from the school. It wasn’t one of the cycle ones so we knew we wouldn’t be disturbed with anybody taking a Sunday afternoon ride.

“How did it go with Dr Sue?” I asked after filling in Christopher.

“A lot easier than it was for you. She took some blood samples to make sure that the contraceptive was working correctly, she also counselled me about having sex at our age.”

“Did she tell you off?”

“She wasn’t at all judgemental and seemed to be more worried that I was physically and mentally okay. Just like Rachel made sure that you’d not be forced, Dr Sue was the same for me.”

“Are you okay coming with me tomorrow?”

“Of course,” replied Christopher like I was asking the stupidest question in the world. “I doubt that it is going to be pleasant for you and I want to be there to comfort you if needed.”

“Perhaps we should just cancel.”

“Firstly, I doubt that Rachel would let you and secondly, I think it is something you need. You admitted yourself that it seems strange how you get sick when aroused. I think it would do you good to try and understand why. That way we can avoid making you ill.”

The rest of the day went quickly, there never seemed to be a moment to brood about the impending split. At first I thought it was just coincidence but the more I thought about it, in the little time I had to think, the more I thought differently.

“Thank you,” I said to the others as the clock approached curfew.

“For what?”

“For keeping me from going insane. I suspect that you have all been busy keeping me and Christopher entertained, so we didn’t have time to think about our forced separation.

“Your welcome,” said Jill. “I remember what it was like when I watched Anna move and I didn’t want you suffering the same. Just remember it is only two nights and the quicker you go to sleep the quicker you’ll see each other.”

We made our way slowly up the stairs and after the others had disappeared into their rooms, gave each other a long and lingering kiss before reluctantly separating for the night. This would be the first night we’d been apart since we’d got together.

Sleep didn’t come easily. In fact it didn’t come at all. At first I just lay there, thinking about how unfair the punishment was. As I closed my eyes, knowing that the next day was lessons, all I could see was visions of Helen and Christopher. I tried not to, but it was all too much and I started to cry.

After a time, I gradually got a hold of my emotions and became more aware of my surroundings. Faintly, in the distance, I heard crying and after a moment recognised it. It was Christopher. Well actually it sounded like Helen, who at the moment sounded like what I’d been going through. All the tips she’d been given on how to sound more masculine had disappeared and she was in the middle of a deep and emotional upheaval.

I tried to open the interconnecting door but it was sealed. I banged on the door and shouted, “Are you okay?” but I got no response and the crying just continued.