Either Do it Right, or Don't Do it at All (Part 14)

Either Do it Right, or Don't Do it at All
Part 14

by:
Lilith Langtree


She eyed me for a second and then reached into her robe pocket to produce something. Unfurling her fingers I saw what it was and sucked in a sharp breath.


 
Part 14

"I love you, Casidhe."

Oh my god.


~O~

If my heart beat any harder I might have needed a cardiologist in the near future.

"I..I…" I apparently can't speak properly anymore.

"You don't have to say anything right now. In fact, I'm pretty sure you shouldn't say anything positive or negative."

My eyebrows went into confusion mode. "Why?"

"Because, if you say you love me too, then I'll probably do something that neither of us is ready for, and if you say you don't or that you want to slow down, then I'll be a useless lump of flesh for the next year." I made to respond, but he kissed me again, just a peck. "I just wanted to let you know how I felt."

I made my decision, spur of the moment, and stepped back, opening the door further. "Come in, Mark."

He shook his head in regret. "I don't want to screw us up."

Determination set in my face. "We need to talk and I'd like to get out of these heels, so you can come inside, or I can suffer while we stand here. Appealing to his more chivalrous side, I won. It was a little victory, I know, but sometimes the little victories are what make life worth living.

"I'm sorry." He stepped inside and I closed the door behind him.

"Don't apologize, baby. Most guys don't wear heels, so they can't really understand that they sometimes hurt after prolonged wear."

I watched him for a second, specifically his hands. The fingers twitched a little before he noticed what I was looking at and disappeared them in his pockets. Trying not to let him see that I was affected by his nervousness I crossed the living room and turned on a light before sitting down on the couch. Mark followed a few seconds after and I saw his indecisive gaze linger on one of the armchairs before reacting to my subtle patting on the couch beside me.

The air had grown with tension and I couldn't take it anymore. "Mark, sit by me, please," I almost pleaded.

Being the gentleman he was, it didn't take long for him to comply. While he was trying to look casual, I reached down to slip off the slingbacks and curl my stocking clad feet underneath me.

"Talk to me. Tell me what's going on in your head."

His eyes fluttered close and I thought he was going to make a run for it; anything to avoid the impending conversation. I saw that I had made things extremely uncomfortable, and regretted that.

"I'm sorry, that wasn't fair to you." His eyes opened back up and he looked at me with a tinge of relief. "Let me tell you what's going on in my head and we'll take it from there, okay?"

Mark nodded and the tension in his shoulders eased. I looked toward the kitchen and suddenly craved a Coke, but I held back. This needed to be done tonight, or at least started tonight anyway.

"Remember when we first met?"

He nodded.

"That's when I fell for you."

Mark blinked his eyes once and they widened a bit afterward.

"It was when you picked up my sandal and put it back on my foot. It was incredibly sweet of you." Without pausing for a reaction I continued. "But you were a senior and I was a lowly sophomore, not to mention the possessive girlfriend that was pulling you away at the time.

"Chloe and I talked after. I was all gooey-eyed and sighing in quite the Jane Austin way, and she set me straight. I was the new girl, and half the female population of Desmond already had the hots for you. I didn't stand a chance. So I moved on."

He made to interrupt me, but I held up my hand. "You didn't want to go first, so you have to wait now."

A nod of acceptance, and I leaned my head to the back of the couch. "Over the last four months I got to know you. Not only how dedicated you are to your schooling, but I got to know the guy behind all of the flash of baseball captain, and upper crust family, not to mention the body of a Greek god and eyes that make me want to melt every five seconds I'm around you."

I stopped for a moment and gave him a wispy smile. "I got to see that you were thoughtful, courteous, very funny, and a hopeless romantic. So what's a girl to do but fall in love?"

I leaned back as he made his move to kiss me. It took all of my willpower to do it, but I put a hand in between us. "Sorry, you have to hear the whole thing first."

Seeing the internal conflict he was suffering I tried to speed things along. "So then we come to your parents. From what I remember, they were a lot like my parents. I can see how much they love you and want what is best for you."

"What do you mean?" he asked. "Did they say something I missed?"

I looked away, to the coffee table. "While you were upstairs getting ready, your mom and I had a talk."

"Oh no."

With a somewhat repressed giggle, I clarified. "It wasn't anything bad. No baby photos were involved. She just wanted to know a little bit about me and what I had planned for the future."

Raking his hand over his mouth let me know that Mark wanted me to get on with it and hit him with the worst of the news.

"I could see the wheels turning in her head, Mark. She's already planning the wedding." I smiled at him with my own conspiratorial grin. "It's okay, moms do this. It doesn’t mean anything except that she approves of me. But it got me thinking about the future."

"Casidhe," he poked in. "I'm in no rush. You're only sixteen. I don't expect…"

"Shh! I'm not finished."

"Right, sorry."

I clasped my hands together and intertwined my fingers. "I want you to think about something, very carefully." He confirmed his acquiescence. "Let's say for argument's sake that a few years down the road we were to get married, okay?" He nodded. "You are the only male child in your family. I won't be able to give you any children."

"Casidhe, that doesn't…"

"Sush! I'm still not finished." Easing the grip I had on each of my hands was important, because they were beginning to hurt. "It does matter. You are going to make a fabulous father one of these days, Mark, but I'll never be able to be the one to make that happen for you."

"Casidhe, I'm adopted."

Why does this keep happening to me? I go all into the self sacrificing rant mode and I keep getting cut off because I've gone in the completely wrong direction.

Tears raced down my cheek and I made some incomprehensible noise before Mark pulled me into him. My fingernails dug into his shirt, and I barely kept it together. "I love you so much, Mark. It's driving me nuts."

"Shh, it's okay," he breathed into my hair.

"We haven't even gone out for our second date! I shouldn't be feeling this much."

I saw him reach over to the side table, and soon thereafter a tissue appeared in my field of vision.

"Casidhe, my parents met when they were on separate vacations in Hawaii. For almost two weeks they got to know each other, which mainly, to my horror I found out, consisted of a lot of sex."

I giggled and sniffled at the same time. I don't recommend trying this at home.

"She came back here, and Dad went back to Chicago. A month later he packed everything he owned and moved here to finish college and to be next to her." Mark petted my hair soothingly. It was starting to become one of my favorite pastimes. "Love sometimes happens that fast, and it's intense when it does. But we've got a couple of years before you finish school and go to college. We can wait and make sure what we feel isn't hormones. But it doesn't stop us from enjoying the moment."


~O~

Susan's gonna kill him. I remember my nose itched, and then waking up in his arms, on the couch. It was after two in the morning and we had fallen asleep. I shook Mark's shoulder. "Baby, wake up."

Mark snorted a little and shifted until his eyes opened in confusion. "Cas…?"

I unfurled my legs and stood up a bit shakily. "You can't go home this late." Holding my hand out I gave him a grab hold gesture. "Let's go to bed."

He tried to blink away his sleepiness. "Are you sure, Casidhe?"

I nodded. "I think we're both too tired to do anything naughty anyway. So, there's no getting out of being in my bed tonight, baby."

We retreated upstairs and I washed my face while Mark was settling himself in an unfamiliar bed. After changing into my babydoll with matching panties, I flipped off the light to the bathroom and entered the darkness of my bedroom. I could see Mark's outline in the dim light that sifted through one of the windows and chose the opposite side of the bed.

Remembering a magazine article in some airport a few years back, I smiled. It said that men naturally slept closest to the door in case they had to defend their women in the middle of the night.

"Are you sure you want me in here. I can sleep in another bed…"

"You are kidding, right? We're young and in love. We have the house all to ourselves and you want to sleep in another bed?" I kidded him playfully.

I pulled the covers down and climbed in. "If you think I am letting this chance go by without taking full advantage of the situation then you aren't as smart as I thought you were." I paused for a second before a thought came to me. "What are you wearing underneath those covers?"

"Um, my t-shirt and slacks."

I giggled, just a little bit. "Mark, I promise I won't attack you. Underwear is more than enough."

"But…"

"Strip mister, before I wake up anymore and keep you up all night."

I savored the next moments as any girl would. He tossed the covers back and stood beside the bed, peeling his slacks off. The moonlight wouldn't reveal the color of said underwear, but I could tell it was the sporty kind that had a strip of elastic on the sides instead of the complete tighty-whitey variety. Trying not to stare was becoming a chore. Instead I tore my eyes away and watched as he pulled off his tee and set it aside.

He moved rather slowly, indicating his comfort with me seeing his body. Why would he be uncomfortable? He knew what I thought of him. The fact that I had an almost constant desire to lick every… okay get off that topic, Casidhe. Sleep.

Mark got back into bed and adjusted his pillow for maximum fluffiness and then I slid in and hitched my leg over his and my arm across his chest. I sighed deeply. This is what every evening should be like. "Perfect."

"Yeah."


~O~

To my knowledge I haven't slept with somebody in the bed with me since I was about five, and woke up in the middle of the night from a nightmare. It was my mother then that came to my rescue. From what I remember, the feeling of waking up and seeing my mother's smiling face was absolutely nothing in comparison to seeing Mark's.

I was laying in the crook of his arm, against his chest and he was doing his best to watch me. An embarrassed smile slid across my face and I rubbed at my nose before lightly patting him on his chest. "Quit looking at me. I've got to be major league scary in the mornings."

"I don't see how you do this," he said low, but not in a whisper, almost like he didn't want to break the sanctity of the moment. "Every day we've been together you get more and more beautiful."

Reaching across his chest I pulled myself into him even more, tangling our legs together and snuggling my head under his chin. "Keep talking like that and you'll be stuck with me forever."

My eyes sprang open and I tensed. "Sorry, jumping the gun a little there."

"It's okay." His hand ran down my back, comforting me. "I think it's natural, planning for the future. I mean we wouldn't be dating otherwise, right?"

Letting my hand go in exploration of my boyfriend's chest with a single finger I asked, "How do you mean?"

He composed himself in thought. "The whole point with dating is to search for the person you want to spend the rest of your life with. At least it's that way with me."

"Me too."

"Good. So I don't mind talk of the future. It gives us a chance to let each other know what to expect."

I thought on that. "Give me a 'for instance'."

"Hmm, okay. I'm going to say for argument's sake, from here on out, that in a few year's time I propose, we get married, and settle down. Whatever context settling down means."

I nodded and found myself tracing the lines of his pectoral muscles. "Okay. Sounds reasonable."

"So, at some point I want to have children. I assume we'll adopt."

"Naturally."

"How many kids do you want?"

I let out a puff of warm air across his chest in a slight giggle. "Um… at least three."

"Three?"

"Four?" I countered.

He chuckled, which was a wonderful sound, hearing it directly from his chest.

"I was an only child. Maybe it's because of that. I couldn't imagine a more happier sound than having an armful of children laughing with me," I explained.

I felt him nod. "Okay, four kids."

"You do realize that we haven't even officially gone on our second date yet, and here we are in bed, after an emotional evening, sorting out the rest of our lives?"

"You forgot that we are still both teenagers," he countered.

"Good point."

"How about we go on that second date. It is Saturday, after all."

My knee hiked up a little and I felt something… whoops. "Sorry."

"It's natural, happens every morning."

"Every morning?" That was something that I didn't know. Must be a guy thing that I never experienced.

"Uh huh."

"And do you have to do anything to make it go away?"

"Go to the bathroom."

Ah! It's one of 'those' physical male things. Since voiding his bladder made the Louisville Slugger go away I deduced his prostate was being stimulated with pressure from his bladder. But that didn't explain why I never got erections. Not that I ever wanted one. Blech. How do guys even put up with something going all hard at the slightest reason. That had to be uncomfortable.

"Well, I suppose I should let you take care of that. Then we get to go over to your place and explain to your mother how you took advantage of me last night."

His hands jumped to my sides and started dancing around on my ribs. A loud shriek rent the air as I was definitely not used to being tickled, especially first thing in the morning. On the other hand, trying to respond by tickling Mark was like trying to tickle a large piece of granite. Sometimes life was so unfair.


~O~

The look we received, from Susan, upon entrance through the back door was odd, to say the least. It wasn't accusatory in the slightest bit. I think I would describe it as, 'I know what you two have been up to, don't think I don't,' mixed with, 'I'm waiting for an answer before I pass judgment,' with just a dash of, 'you kids are so cute that I am going to laugh myself silly listening to what you are about to make up.'

I push Mark ahead and give him a nod. "Go shower and change. I'll talk with your mother."

"But…"

"This is a ladies only conversation, Mark. You haven't been certified yet to know what goes on in the girls bathroom much less with mother/girlfriend talks."

"Oh," he said in understanding, only to look more confused than ever. "What?"

I pulled him down and kissed him with a smile. "Go on."

He disappeared and I turned back to Susan, who was sitting there in a very nice silk robe, sipping on a mug of coffee, giving me a very amused looked. She held up her mug and offered. "Coffee?"

I looked around. "Thank you. Just point me and I can get it."

She gestured to her left and I saw the half empty carafe and a heating pad on the counter.

"So?"

I had my back to her as I filled a mug I snagged off of a nearby mug tree and added one sugar. "Susan. I love your son."

Waiting for a response was almost brutal, but I did, busying myself with a stir stick.

"I know."

Releasing a breath I took another before trudging on. "Has he told you about my medical condition?"

"A little. He told Michael and I about your parents, and that you were injured at the time."

I sipped at the coffee. Mmm, Starbucks Morning Blend. Turning around, I made my way back to the counter and took one of the empty stools. After setting my coffee down I looked up at her. All previous emotion was wiped from her face.

"On a related matter, I can't have sex… at least not until my operation at the end of the year."

She reared her head back a little and nodded in understanding. "I'm sorry."

I shook my head. "It's not your fault. No need to be sorry. I just wanted to tell you that so that you don't think ill of Mark staying over last night."

Susan blinked a little, unsure of what to say.

"When we got home we had a very emotional little talk, and as a result fell asleep on the couch. I woke up around two'ish and dragged him up to a proper bed."

She smiled in response to that and then stopped. "Did the two of you sleep together?"

I didn't wait, to let her know that I wasn't making this up as I went along. "He was every bit a gentleman, but I wanted to know what it felt like waking up in his arms."

My face started to radiate a little heat. I knew it was starting to redden.

"Mark told me that you live by yourself."

I nodded. "Gramps made sure I was emancipated after his death. I've been alone since the end of November."

"So, in the eyes of the law, you are an adult?"

Again I nodded. "For almost everything, yes."

She sipped at her coffee. "Mark is eighteen. Other than living in this house and abiding by the rules his father and I set down, he's free to make his own decisions." After clearing her throat a little she continued. "That does not mean that I won't give unsolicited advice or tell him when he is wrong."

My hands worried at the handle of the mug I was nervously turning around in a circle. "If what I've seen from Mark is any indication of what you and Michael are capable of in terms of raising a son, then I'd want to hear your opinion on what we did."

Susan's head tilted a little to the side. "I've never seen Mark so happy." She got up and walked over to the carafe to top off her mug. "Don't get me wrong. He was always a happy child growing up. We were amazingly lucky that he turned out that way he did. But since, oh I'd say around February or so, his attitude has changed."

Which coincides amazingly with the downfall of the Ex-girlfriend from the Black Lagoon.

"In what way?"

"He's surprisingly serious about his life now." She smiled a little in remembrance. "He's making plans for college and has been very talkative with his father about life. I think we have you to thank for this."

My head dropped and my face finished its journey into the lava pit.

"So you can see my dilemma." Retaking her seat, she set her mug down. "Do I act all motherish and annoying, or do I encourage you two to continue the path that you are on? Both of you are still quite young, but seem well beyond the normal stages of the typical High School crush."

I nodded and tried to lower the blood level to my face. "That's one of the things that Mark and I spoke about last night and this morning."

"Any conclusions?" she asked with great interest right before sipping on her freshly filled mug.

"We both want four children."

I couldn't help it. It just came out. I had to dodge pretty quickly to avoid the spray of coffee. Just at that point Michael strolled through the kitchen door and stopped. "Darling, why are you spitting coffee all over Casidhe?"

Susan gave me my #2 Death Stare. Hey, that's patented! It morphed into Delighted Vengeful Glare #4 otherwise known as the, 'you asked for it, sucker.' Oh no!

"It seems that Casidhe and Mark are planning on making us grandparents earlier than we thought."

"You're pregnant!" came a little preteen girl's voice from behind Michael.

"What?!" Oh sure, why not add Mark to the mix as well.

Susan looked well and truly pleased with her parry of my 'coffee spray ploy' and countered with the 'embarrassed in front of the entire family decapitation scenario.' I was in the presence of a true master of the art! Should I grovel and ask her forgiveness, or perhaps counter with one of my more lethal jabs, or … oh, I know.

I palmed my hands together and bent deeply at the waist. "I am at your mercy, Madame Vengeance. Can this unworthy girl be found moderately talented enough to study the ancient art of verbal swordplay at your side?"

She eyed me for a second and then reached into her robe pocket to produce something. Unfurling her fingers I saw what it was and sucked in a sharp breath.

"If you can take the scrunchie from my hand, you will be found worthy, young one."

Lightening quick I whipped my hand out but was denied when she jerked away. "Sucker!"

GAAAAAH!!!

"Does this mean you aren't pregnant?"

After giving Susan a playful glare I finally answered Casey. "No, sweetie. I'm not. Mommy was just playing around with Daddy, and used me as her foil because she has a drinking problem."

Touché! Haw haw, Now run away or I shall taunt you a second time! Pfft!

"Casidhe O'Connor!" she replied in a loud disapproving voice, but not quite.

I grabbed my boyfriend. "Hurry Mark, make a break for it! I'll hold her off! I've got the coffee held hostage." I grabbed my stir stick and held it up to the carafe. "Nobody moves or the Starbucks Morning Blend gets it."

"Now that's just playing dirty," shot Susan.

I eyed her warily and then arched an eyebrow. "Truce?"

Uh oh, the, 'can I get her with one more' tongue on the corner of her mouth pose. So, I poked the carafe.

"Fine. Truce, for now, young upstart. One day you will be mine."

Dropping the stir stick I reached up to Mark. "Yea!" I kissed him on the cheek. "The student has become the master."

Susan giggled, just a little. "Come on Darth Casidhe. Help me clean up for breakfast."

Michael looked at Susan and then at me. "Both of you are insane, you know this, right."

I shrug, more than pleased. "That's the way Mark likes me."


~O~

I was assigned to cutting the vegetables, while Susan worked on the omelet base. The boys were setting the breakfast table in the next room and drinking coffee.

I was the little woman in the kitchen with her prospective 'maybe someday mother in law' helping to prepare breakfast!

"What are you all happy about?" asked Susan with genuine happy curiosity.

I looked away from the pepper I was dicing to her face. "I…"

She stopped beating the eggs and set her hand on my forearm. "Casidhe?"

My eyes burned for a second. I knew they were going glassy. "I'm sorry." A quick sniff later and I unburdened myself. "I’m just very happy right now. All of you have been so wonderful…"

Setting down the bowl, Susan took me in her arms and squeezed me, lovingly. "And we're happy to have you with us. You make us very happy too, Casidhe."

I tried to breathe through the emotions welling up inside, but it was no use. "It's been so long," I quietly sobbed. "I miss my mom and dad."

"Oh sweetie." Her arms tightened and eased the pain that had built up for so many years in my chest. "Well, you're stuck with us. We're your family, now." She reared back a little and held me by the shoulders. "Even if things," she shrugged and winced a little. "Even if things don't eventually work out between you and Mark, you can come to us."

That did it. Tears poured rivers down my face, and I could see that it was having an effect on Susan as well. She was good people. Very good people.

"Now, before you have me totally lose it, go clean yourself up and take a minute, okay?"

I gave her my most complying smile, and after grabbing my purse, followed her directions to the closest restroom, down the hall, off the kitchen. Looking at my self in the large oval mirror, I cringed. It wasn't awful, thanks to the waterproof mascara, but I was smudged and red eyed.

A few cleansing breaths later, I turned the cold water on and dabbed at my face to remove the worst of the damage. A few minutes later, I wasn't perfect, the red eyes and all, but I was repaired. I turned the water off and heard whispering on the other side of the door. Maybe they weren't aware of it, but the walls and door in that particular restroom were amazingly paper thin. Holding my purse against my chest I leaned into the door and concentrated my hearing on what was being said.

"… serious, Mark. She's in a very fragile state right now. If you aren't one hundred percent serious about pursuing her right now, then I want you to break it off."

"Mom, I am serious. She's great!"

"I know."

Gah! Something was said too low for me to hear." … is in love with you and it would piss me off to no end to find out that you had been stringing her along."

"I'm not. I love her, Mom."

Dammit! My eyes are burning again!

"… after only four months."

"… you and Dad… two weeks."

"Good point."

The conversation paused for a couple of moments. "I need to go get breakfast ready. Take as much time as she needs. I'll keep it warm for you."

With one more cleansing breath, I checked my face once more and then opened the door. He was leaning against the wall opposite the restroom looking concerned, and stood straight when I emerged.

"Sorry," I said with more than a little embarrassment. "Everything just rushed up and smacked me in the head."

He didn't say a word about being silly, and instead closed the distance between us and took me in his arms. "I love you, you know that, right?"

I gave him one really good squeeze and then backed away, quickly fanning my hands at my eyes. "Don't make me cry again, Mark."

Maybe these hormones I was taking weren't worth all of the emotional upheaval I had been experiencing over the last week. I swear, the last five years I hadn't cried once, and now I was like a leaky faucet all the time.

"I'm sorry."

A little hiccup jarred me and I giggled. "It's nothing to be sorry about, sweetie. I haven't been so happy since before my parents… you know."

He nodded. "Sure."

"I guess it was just too much." I ran my free hand across his chest in circles. "Your mom and I, in the kitchen making breakfast for you and your dad… and Casey too. It felt very… right, I guess. Very domesticated. Like I was the little woman and you were my husba…" My eyes widened at what was spewing from my lips. "And I'm probably scaring the hell out of you right now."

A bark of laughter burst forth from his lips. I was in his arms again, melting from the love the Tanner family had shown me. It was too perfect, too storybook. It most definitely had to be a dream, but if it was then god help me if I ever woke up, because I wouldn't be able to go on if it all was imaginary.


~O~

The omelets were perfect, the juice perfect, the side of bacon more meat and not so much fat — perfect, and the cheerful company — surreal. As I waited for Mark to circle the Viper, after opening my door for me, I realized how emotionally exhausted I already felt, and it was only nine in the morning!

Mark made himself comfortable and made sure I was buckled in before securing himself and putting the car into gear. Before he released his hold on the brake I set my hand against his. He was content and ready for a day with his girlfriend. I could almost see the satisfaction on his face.

"Thank you for sharing your family with me."

It looked like he wanted to say something, but didn't know exactly how to put it into words, instead the sides of his lips curled slightly. "Are you ready?"

I nodded and squeezed his hand before retrieving mine, and leaned back for where he was taking me, because this was going to be the best day of my life.


~O~

"Minigolf?"

"Yeah, what's wrong with minigolf?"

I giggled. "Absolutely nothing. It's brilliant, actually."

"I know," he said in a self-congratulatory way. My boyfriend is a little goofy sometimes, but it was endearing. "Besides, nothing cool opens until eleven so we need to work up an appetite for lunch."

"Wonderful reasoning, baby." I had to stick it to him a little. "You do know that the mall opens at ten and Macy's is having a sale today?"

He swallowed dramatically, it was more of a gulp. "We… could go… shopping if you want."

I grabbed a hold of his upper arm and pulled him down for a kiss. "I'm kidding. I'm not quite the clothes hound Chloe is." As a flirty afterthought I added, "Though I could use some more lingerie. Did you like the babydoll I wore last night?"

"Uh huh." Good, I have him speechless.

"I was thinking something along the lines of a corset, and …"

"Baby, I'm not going to be able to play right if I'm thinking of you dressed like that."

With a naughty grin I laughed lightly. "My point exactly."


~O~

Mark sooooo let me win. How do I know? On the fifth hole I was distracted by a pretty waterfall on an upcoming course, but managed to see him bank three times off opposing walls to hole the ball with the first shot. He looked satisfied, but not ecstatic like I was when I made a hole in one by accident on the second hole. Isn't he sweet!

Afterward, we went down to the boardwalk where they had live music by an outdoor Cajun restaurant. I was treated to a very messy meal of boiled crawfish, new potatoes, and corn on the cob. Mark taught me how to peel the disgusting things and suck their heads to remove the juice. I squealed in fright, but had the most fun helping him remove the spicy juices dripping from his mouth. I may have used my own mouth at the time, but I think it was worth it in the end.

"I think I'm going to explode. I'm bloated."

"So, no cotton candy?"

With our fingers laced, my hand felt tiny in comparison to his, but I squeezed hard anyway. There was no way I could actually hurt him, even if I wanted. I squeezed out a plea. "Share with me?"

Mark just rolled his eyes a little and smiled. Yeah, I can be goofy too. I spotted an unoccupied bench close by. "I need to put on a little sunscreen. I don't want to freckle up."

He nodded. "I'll be right back."

Retrieving a tube of odorless sunscreen from my purse I slipped off my sandal and spread a good sized dollop down my leg, careful to make sure I was completely covered. This was the one problem with being fair skinned and a red head. Freckles. The make up I was wearing insured my face was safe since it included a blocker in the mix, but my arms and legs were in danger from exposure, not to mention my tummy. It was amazing how much skin girls actually showed in relation to boys.

My shorts barely inched past my butt, unlike Mark's which were past his knees, and the tee I chose for the day bottomed out at the lowest rib in my chest, so I was showing quite a lot of belly considering the shorts were also low rise. Thank goodness I regularly shaved the small amount of hair I grew down below, or I'd be quite the slut today.

I looked up before switching to my left leg to repeat the process and saw Mark watching me with avid interest from the cotton candy vendor's cart. He had chosen blue and was standing there holding a single paper cone looking thingie with a mountain of puff on top. I gave him a tooth filled smile and finger waved.

Stretching out my left leg, I gave him a bit of a show, now that I knew what held his attention. I had almost forgot: eyes, butt, and legs were his thing. So I lightly covered my foot and then slipped it back into the sandal, and then stood up to turn around, like I needed somewhere to set the tube of sunscreen. I bent over at the waist and slid my hands down my leg, rubbing the sunscreen over my thigh and spending an inordinate amount of time on my calf and ankle, before straightening out and turning back around.

Whoops.

Mark was about five feet away holding only the paper cone thingie. The cotton candy was on the ground beside him. My shorts felt a little weird and I reached back to tug them down. I knew they were too short. I hope my cheeks didn't escape so I didn't show too much… really. I do know that my thong was firmly embedded in my butt at the moment, but pulling that out would probably be kind of rude in public.

I looked down at the blue confection beside Mark's foot and I may have smiled a little. "Distracted?"

"That was evil."

"Uh huh." Going up on my toes I kissed him and whispered in his ear. "Just remember. What you saw is all yours."

"Here you go dude. Completely understandable." I looked around Mark and saw the vendor holding out another cone of cotton candy. I thanked him with a bright smile. Guys are just too easy.


~O~

We walked to a nearby park and watched kids fight for dominance at the playground swings and massive fort built just for them, and then sat and watched the ducks swim by in the large pond in the center of the park. We may or may not have made out for a short time on that bench. I didn't want to scare the kiddies after all.

The day was simple and sweet. We didn't do anything over the top, just spending time getting to know one another was enough, and I was cemented into being his girl for as long as he'd have me. If he were to have pulled out a ring and proposed I probably would have said yes. That's how far gone I am. Stupid and immature? Probably. Love sick and overly emotional? Most assuredly. Well in the deep end, over my head in delusional lala land. Beyond question.

Young and in love with no care in the world? Without any doubt whatsoever.


~O~

My eyes were closed almost the entire way home, but a smile graced my face in memory of the single perfect day. Fantasies coursed through my head of fantastic futures and even more days like the one we had experienced: Having the operation and finding out I had been a real girl all along, it all being a huge mistake; making love with Mark in front of a soft fire in some mountain cabin; becoming pregnant and giving birth to our first child and breastfeeding him as my husband watched on in awe; growing old, but staying young in heart; watching our children graduate…

But then it all was interrupted by a loud screech and darkness.


~O~

"Mark…" Ugh. My throat was raw and my voice horse, deeper than normal.

"Casidhe?" a familiar young voice whispered.

The smell of antiseptic filled my nose. That was familiar as well. I tried opening my eyes but one of them was covered. The other crusted close from too much sleep.

"Casey?"

I felt her take my left hand. "Stay still, I'll be right back."

My fingers gripped her hand and I wouldn't let go. "No… what happened," I rasped. "Where's Mark?"

My other hand wouldn't move right as I tried to wipe at my eye so I could see.

"I'll go get Mom and Dad. They went down to the cafeteria to get something to eat. I promised I'd get them if you woke up."

I released her hand and dug at my eye as I heard Casey dart from the room. Dammit! I was in the hospital. What happened? Where was Mark? Clearing away most of the crap in my free eye I was able to blink my vision to a semblance of normal.

My right arm was in a cast past my elbow and from the feel of my face, I probably had a head injury. Mark would tell me what happened.

"Mark?"

I turned my head, and my vision swam. The knot growing in my stomach hurt and was getting worse.

"Mark?" I whispered to the empty room.

Someone came into the room that I didn't recognize. He was wearing blue scrubs and had a stethoscope hanging out of his pocket. "Miss O'Connor. It's good to see you back with us."

"Where's Mark?" I asked, bordering on the edge of panic. Tears blurred my eye and I brushed at my face. "My husband… where is he?"

"Miss O'Connor, you'll need to calm down. You shouldn't be exerting…"

"FUCK YOU! WHERE'S MY HUSBAND!" I was beyond any sense of calm. "MARK! MARK!"

The nurse or doctor or whoever the hell he was leaned over me as I thrashed on the bed. He didn't try to grab at me, just prevented me from getting up.

"Miss O'Connor, stop, you'll aggravate your injuries."

"Oh my god." Susan!

I reached back and hit the guy holding me down as hard as I was able. "Susan! Where's Mark! MARK! GET OFF ME YOU FUCK! WHERE'S MY HUSBAND!"


~O~

"… and you can kiss my ever loving ass, Mr. Sebastian. Casidhe needs family and I am family," Susan's voice whispered angrily.

"I'm am her lawyer and a close family friend, Mrs. Tanner. You have no legal hold over Casidhe or else I would know about it. I don't know you and I'm asking you nicely, one more time, before I have security brought up here and have you escorted from the room."

"Just try it, and I'll have your balls for breakfast." Venom filled Susan's voice as she growled out the threat.

"…" I tried to speak, but nothing came out, so I did the only thing I had the strength to do, bang my cast against the safety bars that held me from falling out of the bed accidentally.

Susan's eyes widened when she saw my movement, and she pushed Sam out of the way. "Casidhe!"

Clearing my throat hurt worse than ever.

"Oh! Hold on, let me get you some water."

"Perhaps, you should wait until the doctor says it's okay for her to have water, Mrs. Tanner."

"Put a sock in it, Sebastian."

She directed a bendy straw to my lips and I sucked greedily.

"Not too much, just soothe your throat."

I did as instructed and let the straw go. As before, Mark was the first thing on my mind. "Mark?"

"He's next door, sweetie," she said as she brushed away the hair hanging in my face. "Michael and Casey are with him."

"Are the babies okay?"

Her face went all strange like she didn't know what I was talking about, but it changed again and she smiled at me sweetly. "The babies are just fine, Casidhe. Your friend is babysitting."

Oh good. "Chloe's a wonderful aunt isn't she?"

Susan's eyes went all glassy and a tear ran down her face. "Yes, baby. She's the best." She sniffed and covered her mouth for a moment. "Tell me about the babies, sweetie, okay?"

I closed my eye for a moment. Focusing was becoming a problem, but I opened it again a second later.

"… medication… mild hallucina… along with it for now."

Susan appeared again. "Hey," she looked better than just a second ago. "You're with us again."

I felt her hand on my fingertips. "Mikey starts school this fall. Little Chloe is mad at him for leaving her."

"That's what children do, Casidhe."

I smiled a little at her but it hurt, so I winced.

"Are you in pain, sweetie?"

Shaking my head was a bad idea. "I want to be awake for Susan's feeding. Don't make me go back to sleep."

Mom's face didn't look so good anymore. "Don't cry, Mom. Everything will be…"



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