Either Do it Right, or Don't Do it at All (Part 15)

Either Do it Right, or Don't Do it at All
Part 15

by:
Lilith Langtree


"Nobody's allowed to see him, and Mrs. Tanner isn't talking. She said that you deserved to hear it from her first." At seeing my reaction she gave me a touch more information. "I do know that he's in the CCU."

"The what?"

"Critical Care Unit."


 
Part 15

"Wakeupwakeupwakeupwakeupwakeupwakeup."

Someone really annoying was whispering a mantra in the vicinity of my butt. I cracked an eye and saw a mop of messy blonde hair covering the face of my best friend.

"Hey, message received."

Chloe jerked back and then squeezed the heck out of my hand. "You're awake?"

I tried to wipe the ever increasing amount of eye-crud away and was reminded that I didn't have full use of my right arm. Knowing Chloe, there was no way I would have the use of my only functional hand if I didn't distract her. "Can I have some water?"

"Oh, yeah… sure. Hold on."

Bleh. I need a washcloth.

"Here you go."

I recognized her insistence on holding the cup for me, and the swinging of the bendy straw around. Sipping only a mouthful, I let it go and relished the feel of cool water sliding down my throat.

"How do you feel?"

"Um… not good. What's wrong with me?"

Chloe grimaced. "Nobody knows but Sam and the doctors, and they're not talking. Family only, the doctors say." Her eyebrow quirked and her face went a little whimsical. "You should have seen Mrs. Tanner. I thought she was going to…"

I cut her off. "Mark! Is he okay?"

She shrugged her shoulders. "Nobody's allowed to see him, and Mrs. Tanner isn't talking. She said that you deserved to hear it from her first." At seeing my reaction she gave me a touch more information. "I do know that he's in the CCU."

"The what?"

"Critical Care Unit."

The knot in my stomach came back in full force. "Oh god." I grabbed at Chloe's hand. "You have to get a hold of Susan for me. Please. I have to know what's happening."

"Susan?"

I tried shaking my head in frustration, but a stabbing pain shot through my head. "Mrs. Tanner. Susan Tanner."

Chloe nodded and fumbled for her bag. "She gave me her number in case you woke up. Hang on Cas. I'm on it."

She rushed out of the room. Making an assumption that cell phone use wasn't allowed in this part of the hospital, I let her go without argument. I didn't spend more than a minute alone in the room before a guy showed up, that looked vaguely familiar, in blue scrubs, with another guy in tow.

"Miss O'Connor, how are you feeling this afternoon?"

"Like crap. My face feels like it's going to explode." I winced. Even saying that hurt, not to mention the wincing hurt too. "Maybe it already exploded?"

"I've had them cut back on your pain medication. You were suffering hallucinations. I can try something different if you'd like?"

Closing my eye I tried to clear my thoughts. "Later. I have to be clear-headed right now. Mark, what about Mark."

"Mark Tanner?"

"Yes," I said through gritted teeth. "How is he doing?"

The dark haired guy that had been talking to me all along switched the position of the clipboard he was carrying. "I'm sorry to say that he's under another physician's care, and we are only able to release information to the patient's family."

"I'm," I snapped, which was a really bad idea. I closed my eye again and breathed. "I'm his girlfriend, his fiancé." Well, close enough.

He gave me a questioning eye. "And last night you were his wife." At my shocked looked he tried to change the subject. "Why don't we talk about you."

Why won't anyone tell me what the hell is going on? "I'll wait until I find out about Mark. So you might as well tell me now. His mother will be up here soon."

He spread his hands. "Well there you go. His mother will be here, and I'm sure we'll time it just right so you can be all informed by the time she gets here."

Is this guy serious? Okay, I give up. Looking over to the other guy standing by the door I asked, "Excuse me. Are you a nurse or a doctor?"

He straightened up from trying to look casual leaning against the wall. "I'm just a ward assistant ma'am."

"Cool, thanks for being the only person in existence to give me a straight answer. Would you mind handing me a phone please." I lifted up my cast and kind of waved it. "I'm kinda in a bind here."

"Miss. O'Connor," the original guy interrupted.

"You," I pointed with a hand half-covered in a cast. "Are fired. Go away."

He looked stupefied. "You can't fire me, I'm…"

"Being paid by me and my insurance company." I snapped off. "Thus you work for me, my temporary employee, ergo I can hire and fire you. Now -- go -- away."

Movement from the doorway distracted me. Chloe was standing there with her cell in one hand and a bug-eyed look on her face. She saw me and waved her phone, mouthing, 'On her way.'

"Chloe, did they bring in my purse?"

She nodded and went to a closet located underneath the television against the middle of the wall opposite me. The doctor looked rather constipated. I ignored him, but focused on the ward assistant. "Phone?"

He snapped to and nodded. Before I knew it I was the proud owner/renter? of a beige slimline deluxe, popular with most hospitals, and punching Sam's number from memory.

The doctor left without further comment and Chloe had retrieved my battered and torn purse. What the hell happened to me? More importantly, what happened to Mark? The connection only rang once and I, after assuring Sam's secretary I was alive, if not well, was connected to my lawyer.

"Casidhe, you're awake?"

"Hey Sam. What the 'hell' is going on?"

Normally that would elicit a chuckle or two from my legal overseer. "Hang on, I'm on my way. Give me about fifteen minutes and I'll be there, okay."

"Thanks, Sam."

Chloe waved my bag at me.

"My folio, is it in there?"

After a quick dive she pulled it out. "Great," I sighed.

The ward assistant was still standing beside the bed. I gave him a curious look. "Do you know what kind of doctor Mr. Information there was?"

After making arrangements for a friend of Gramps' to take over my care I hung up and watched Chloe shaking her head in amusement.

"What?"

She giggled. "You. Even as banged up as you are, Hurricane Casidhe still takes the world by storm."

I'd shrug, but there was no telling what kind of pain I would incur if I did. "I don't like people to lord their stupid rules over me, or try to play on the sick and infirm to get their way."

She leaned over me and gave me the briefest and lightest hugs. "I love you, girl. Don't you ever leave me."

The knot that was hovering in my stomach moved up into my throat. "I love you too."

"Get out of my way Sebastian or I'll go through you!"

I looked over to the open door and almost smiled. "Chloe, tell Sam it's okay to let Susan in. Hurry before she castrates him in the hallway."

She was to the door before I could finish and she snapped, "Hey! Knock it off. Cas wants to see both of you."

That's my girl!

Susan was a wreck. Her hair was messy and pulled back in a hurried ponytail, and she was dressed in a mismatched yoga outfit. Her eyes were puffy and red, not to mention her nose looked raw, probably from crappy hospital bargain tissues. However, any way you look at it, she was there when I needed her. I could give a crap about what she looked like.

Her face was hot as she held it up against mine in a light hug and a kiss on the cheek.

"Casidhe, how are you feeling today, sweetie?"

It was kind of hard giving a reassuring smile with only half a face showing. "I'll survive. Susan, they won't tell me anything about Mark."

Her eyes tracked to Chloe, standing beside the bed. I lifted my right arm and kind of point to her. "Sorry, this is my best friend, Chloe."

A spark of recognition lit in Susan's face. "Right, sorry, I was a mess yesterday. I remember Aunt Chloe."

Sam was standing at the end of the bed, looking rather grim at the obviously distraught mother of my boyfriend.

"And I'm sure you've met Sam Sebastian…"

"Oh, we've met."

Sam gave her his best court room smile which wasn't really a smile at all. "Charmed."

Susan's hand had trailed to mine through the introductions. I took advantage of the moment and squeezed it softly. "Tell me what happened."

Regardless of his feelings toward anyone, Sam was always a gentleman. He moved to the side and pushed a seat up for Susan to sit by my side. She produced a smile in thanks and turned back to me.

"The police said that truck ran a red light and hit Mark's car, pushing both of you into oncoming traffic from the other direction."

I did my best not to interrupt her. I really didn't care about how it happened. I only wanted to find out about Mark.

"They took Mark out in Life Flight." Her face went pale at the thought of her son being so bad off that they had to bring in a helicopter to rush him to the hospital. I was in the same camp.

With a lick of her lips she pressed on. "The doctors told me he almost died on the operating table."

My baby… "He's going to be okay, right?"

"He lost a lot of blood Casidhe."

I hadn't realized how fast I was breathing. "They can put more in, right?" Looking at Sam, pleading with my eyes. I begged. "Right?!"

"Cas." Chloe leaned in and lay her hand on my shoulder. "You gotta chill." I was about to tell my best friend to screw off, but the words never made it to my lips. "You gotta get better so you can make sure you're there for Mark."

That seemed to put the brakes on my hysteria. She produced a tissue and wiped at my face.

"You're gonna get better, and then we'll all help Mark get better, right?"

"Right," I sobbed. "You're right, I'm sorry."

Susan squeezed my hand. "You've got nothing to be sorry about, sweetie. The doctors say that he's past the worst of it and he should recover."

After another sip of water, distributed by Chloe, I was coherent enough to continue. "Tell me about his injuries."

Susan nodded. "He has a broken hip, and they were able to save his left arm. That's what caused most of the problems. The worst was the head injury."

"That's what happened to your face, Casidhe," Sam offered.

"Wha…?"

Susan nodded at Sam, so he took over. "The truck hit you on your side of the car, pushing you into another car coming from the opposite direction, traveling much faster. The side airbags deployed, but not quick enough to save him slamming into you from the impact."

Seeing Susan's distress he held out a hand for her and tried to ease the rest out. "The back of Mark's head fractured your ocular cavity in three places and gave him a pretty nasty concussion."

I was frozen in place. Mark had a concussion because of me?

"You were very lucky. If you weren't asleep…"

"Lucky?"

"Bad choice of words, Casidhe. I'm sorry. If you weren't asleep, you would have been injured much worse."

"I want to see him," vomited from my mouth.

"That's… not a good idea right now, Casidhe," said Sam with far too much seriousness in his voice.

That just made it even worse for me. "Sam, I love him." Which I punctuated with several tear drops sliding from my face. "Please."

Want to know why I always have faith in my closest family friend?

He looked in my only eye, at the moment, and knew Mark meant the world to me. A firm resolve covered his face. He turned to Susan. "Mrs. Tanner, with your permission?"

Still clutching my hand she nodded. Sam looked back at me and stood with a lot more conviction than I had seen in a long time. "I'll make it happen." Pointing at me he added. "You relax and pull yourself together. They won't let you go anywhere the state that you are in."

He was off in a flash and I had a second wind. Chloe wiped at my face and gave me another shot of water.

"Thanks."

She smiled at me, shaking her head again.

"Susan, Chloe has my folio. It has a list of all the best doctors in the area and personal friends of my grandpa. If nothing else, call them in for a consult. I'll pay for it. I want Mark to have the best."

Chloe reached the folio over and added, "Just mention Connor O'Connor and that Casidhe wants them to come in."

She took it, looking on with mild confusion.

"We're family," I said with as much conviction as I could muster. "I take care of my family."


~O~

My injuries? My lower arm was separated at the elbow and my ulna broken. My right knee had some ligament damage but it was already repaired. I'll be immobile for a few days and then have to start physical therapy to make sure I have full range of motion. Some strength loss is most likely to occur.

The worst, of course was my left eye. I could probably pass as a double for a nice vampire flick considering there is virtually no white left in my eye. Once the bone heals and the swelling goes down, they'll be able to tell me if I can actually see out of it ever again. I found all of this out when the replacement doctor came to inspect their handiwork. The area was still too swollen for me to even open my eye, so I'm in the dark. Literally.

It does, however explain why whenever I talk, it hurts. That ole jaw bone is located way too close to where I got hit.

I wasn't able to be moved until the new doc gave his okay after checking out my knee. It wasn't even splinted, but was wrapped with enough bandages that I didn't have a chance to move it in the first place.

Susan begged off to go see Mark. Apparently she'd been moving back and forth between Mark and me for two days and, of course, I had Chloe call her during her marathon two hour nap at home. She was moving only by the grace of Starbucks and pure unadulterated determination.

Chloe's mom picked her up. It was a school night and she had homework. But Sam stuck around to enlighten me on things that apparently couldn't be said in mixed company.

"Your secret is still safe."

Frankly the thought hadn't even crossed my mind. "Oh."

"I'm the only one with the authority to know, so the doctors wouldn't have legally been able to tell Mrs. Tanner. But I did remind those in the know, just to be on the safe side."

"Thank you, Sam." He smiled up at me from the chair beside my bed. "I never tell you how much I appreciate everything you do for me."

Lifting my hand to his lips, he placed a little kiss on my fingers. "Yes, you do. I always get paid on time. That's thanks enough."

His joke didn't sink through me enough. "I love you, Sam."

He blinked a couple of times. I think I could count on two fingers how many moments in time I have seen him caught off guard. He always had and answer, a joke, a sharp remark set aside for any occasion, but at that moment he became a little more human to me.

So, of course, I had to take advantage of the situation while I had the chance. "You think I don't notice the things you do for me that aren't noted on the monthly statement? The times you drop whatever it is you are doing so you can rush to my side? I notice, Sam. I just never said anything because you seemed to like doing things undercover, out of the limelight, so to speak."

I pumped my hand a little. "Help me sit up."

He grabbed the little remote control that lifted the back of the bed upright and we waited in silence until it was finished. I didn’t let him sit back down. Instead I patted the bed, next to me, and when he was close enough I let him have it.

"Sam, you're my knight in shining armor. Whenever there's a battle to be fought, you're my champion. But you're also my family. So, if you don't have any plans and feel like spending the day with your pain in the butt pseudo-niece at any time, then you give me a call. I want to be a part of your life."

The look on his face was almost unreadable, but I knew Sam.

"You've got no excuse. You're single, and you aren't so busy with making millions of dollars that you can't take some time out and…"

"Fine," he said with a tad of humor in his voice. "Quit torturing me. I can't take all of this lovey-dovey talk."

It hurt to do so, but I leaned into him for a hug. He was extremely careful not to hurt me, but I hurt anyway. It was amazing how many muscles there are in the human body. Until they all radiate pain, you aren't really aware.

"I love you, Sam."

"I love you too, princess."


~O~

Michael stood at my door, being escorted by someone with a wheelchair. From the look of the metal leg brace attached on the right side, it was for me.

When Sam helped me pivot to the side of my bed I saw myself in a mirror against the wall. It was a shock to see half my face covered by white bandages and the over half with little scrapes and bruises. My hair, what little I could see, was a mess. I tried to keep it together and ran my fingers through the tangles then gave up. I was just in a car accident. I wasn't going to a party.

"You up for this, little lady?"

Michael was still taller than me, even with the added height of the bed. I held out my arms, cast included. He came up and gave me a hug.

"I'm so sorry, Michael."

He kissed my cheek. "Me too. Now let's get you down there so we can get our boy woken up. I just know he's waiting to hear your voice."

Getting into the chair was a lesson in aches and pains, and exactly how much I could take. I bit through most of it because I didn't want to give them a reason to make me get back in bed, but when I was finally able to sit down I let loose a whimper.

"Are you okay, Casidhe?" Sam said with a considerable amount of worry in his voice.

By the time I caught my breath I nodded a little. "Go ahead and plan on pain meds for when I get back."

"Let's get you back up in bed. You don't need to do this right now."

I know the strain was showing on my face. "Then I would have just done this for nothing. I'm already in the chair."

His lips thinned in self-rebuke for not seeing through my plan in the first place. He just gave me a look of discontent. "Let's go then, Miss Smarty Pants."

I was wheeled around and down the hall to a bank of elevators, escorted by Sam, Michael, and the wheelchair was being pushed by a ward assistant, I guess. I couldn't imagine a nurse or doctor taking time out of their busy day catering to me.

While we were on the move I took the time to straighten out the blanket that I was provided so I wouldn't flash the staff or scare the patients. It was kind of screwy, getting used to dong things with my left hand. They secured my right in a sling so it was next to useless and only got in the way.

"They've moved Mark out of Critical Care," Michael announced. That brought my head slinging around. Ouch?

"What?"

Michael nodded. "He's been upgraded. The swelling in his brain has lessoned, and his vitals have normalized." He set his hand on my shoulder. "We just need him to wake up."

I covered his hand with mine. "I'll do my best."

He smiled at me and nodded. "I know you will, Casidhe. But don't take it too hard if he doesn't. He's right at the point where doctors say he should be coming out of it. It could be any time."

Michael started to pull away, but I gripped harder, not wanting to let him go, so he stayed in contact with me.

We were led to a smaller ward, somewhere in between critical and normal care, I didn't get the name and I really didn't give a crap. I just wanted to see Mark. There were a small amount of rooms and a more than normal amount of nurses hanging around. I kept my rude comments to myself about why they were standing around yapping when someone important to me needed their help. I guess there was only so much they could do. Standing over him, fussing wasn't going to make things better. That was my job.

Michael motioned to the assistant to stop the wheelchair and then he squatted beside me with my hand sandwiched between both of his.

"Are you sure you want to do this right now?" Before I got the chance to say yes, he held up a halting hand. "Mark's in bad shape. Nobody would think any less of you if you waited one more day…"

"Would you wait if it was Susan in there and you were in this chair?" I responded in one my most even toned voices.

His eyes glittered for a moment and he shook his head. "I suppose not."

That brought a smile to my face. "Get used to this, Michael. If you think I'm letting Mark go after all of this then you've got a lot to learn about me. I'm tying him down when he wakes up."

He nodded and then stood. "Give me a minute, okay?"

When he disappeared into the room Sam leaned in. "Tying him down?"

I gave him a curious look. "Can a girl give a guy an engagement ring?"

Cool, blank look number two in a single day. He recovered after a few seconds. "I don't think that's exactly how it's supposed to work."

"Will you give me away at the wedding, Sam?"

"Casidhe…"

"I'm serious, Sam." Now he had worried face. So I returned it with a serene smile. "He makes me happy and I love him."

His lips squinched together. "We'll talk about this later."

Sam waited out in the hall and I was escorted in the room. The sight of him lying in bed was two-fold. I was ecstatic to see him alive. That little pain went away in my heart to have it confirmed. However, I was torn to see him in so many bandages. His left arm was packed about twice its size. The only thing visible were the very tips of his fingers and they didn't look a very healthy color.

He wore a turban of sorts with a pillow of bandages on the back right of his skull. I guessed that was where we butted heads. Several tubes were still hooked up to him, leading to IV's and bags hanging to the side of the bed. The one thing that I was worried about seeing wasn't there: an intubation tube, that thing they stick down your throat to help you breathe. In its place was one of those transparent masks coving his mouth and nose.

Casey was sitting in a chair at the foot of the bed and Susan was holding his uninjured hand.

Hold it together, Casidhe. They need to see hope, not you bawling like a baby. I smiled, somewhat unconvincingly, from Susan's reaction.

"He's much better, Casidhe."

The assistant pushed me right up along side the bed and locked the wheels. "Just press the call button when you are ready to leave."

I nodded and vacantly said, "Thank you."

The bed was too freaking high. I couldn't get a good look at him, but I could touch his hand, pull it to my face, and feel his warmth. I breathed out and couldn't hold it back any longer. A single sob escaped from my throat followed by a river of tears.

I heard Michael in the background. "Casey, come on. Why don't we give Mom and Casidhe a few minutes."

I sniffed. "No, don't go. He needs all of us here."

A couple of tissues appeared for me, courtesy of Susan. I grabbed at them with my slung hand and dabbed as best I could without letting go of Mark's hand.

"Michael?"

"What do you need, Casidhe?"

I looked at him pleadingly. "Can you help me stand up?"

Everyone's got such a disapproving grimace on their face today. "Do you think that's such a good idea?"

I didn't answer him, but I did tear my eyes away from Mark's face long enough to let him see the need in my own.

"I guess you do." He looked at the wheelchair for a second and then the bed. "Hold on to the safety bar and I'll turn you around a little"

Following directions to the letter I waited until I was facing diagonally to the bed and he lifted my injured leg to set it on the ground so that I could favor my good leg when I stood. His hands under my arms came next. I pushed off with my good foot to help him along and not be such a dead weight. It was kind of surprising how easy it was. Michael was obviously in good shape or I weighed virtually nothing.

Leaning in, I felt Michael bracing me so I wouldn't fall over, I gave Mark a kiss on his cheek. "I love you, Mark Tanner. You need to quit scaring me to death and wake up now."

Not getting any reaction wasn't surprising, but I still had a Sleeping Beauty fantasy in the back of my head. So much for true love's kiss. My hand was shaking on the safety bar where I was placing almost all of my weight. I wouldn't be able to stand up for much longer.

"Okay," I admitted defeat and Michael eased me back down into the chair. Once I was situated I pulled him to me and kissed his cheek as well. "Thank you. I know I'm a pain in the butt."

He rolled his eyes at me and Susan saved him from commenting. "Why don't you and Casey go grab some drink, Michael."

He nodded and patted me on the shoulder before they left, and I didn't waste any time while they were gone.

"Once I get back on my feet again, I'll be there for anything you need, Susan."

She looked at me wistfully for a few moments. "I know you will. You proved that last night."

The frown I gave her tweaked at my left eye. Okay, stop doing that! Oww! "Pardon?" I squeezed out.

"Your doctor had to sedate you last night because you were screaming at him."

"What?" I was awake at some point?

She covered her mouth in amusement. "I think your exact words were something like, 'Get off me you fuck. Where's my husband?'"

The blood racing from my face was probably highly entertaining. "I… I…"

"Doesn't ring any bells?"

A tiny shake of my head was all I could give. "Nuh uh."

"It must have been some good stuff."

I closed my eye and palmed my face. "Oh god. What else did I say?"

Susan shrugged. "Nothing much. I had just got there and was watching over you for a while. The doctors were giving Mark a post-op examination." She set her hand against his cheek, brushing a thumb over as much area as she could cover. "You wanted to know how the babies were."

"Babies?" I was going to regret asking, but… "What babies?"

Her eyes sparkled at me. "Oh, yours and Mark's, of course."

Would the torture never end?

"Mikey was just starting school, and little Chloe was angry because she was losing her playmate, not to mention you were worried about breastfeeding baby Susan. You were quite insistant."

Susan was loving every minute of it.

"Go…"

We both jumped at that. Susan leaned in to Mark in an almost panicked state. "Mark? Mark? Are you awake, baby?"

I gripped his hand and squeezed with everything I had. "Mark?"

Susan pulled the air mask down and moved her ear closer to his lips?

I was about to pee myself in anticipation when I saw her smile, and laugh out loud.

"What?" I begged. "What'd he say?"

She replaced the mask and grabbed at the nurse call button, punching it a couple of times.

"Susan?" I whined.

She licked her lips and smiled at me. "He said, 'Good names.'"


~O~

"Awww, you named your imaginary first daughter after me?!"

"Don't let it go to your head. I was on about a gallon of morphine at the time."

Chloe broke up and slid around her chair a few times, giggling. I sighed and waited through the laugh track to ease up. It had taken her a few days to worm the information out of me as to why I always turned beet red whenever Susan came to visit.

"Tell me what's going on at school. What are the rumors this week?"

She bounced up in glee. "Oh, Jerry has it up on his site that you and Mark were attacked downtown by the Los Oveja street gang."

"Huh? Doesn't oveja mean sheep?"

Chloe shrugged her shoulders at me. "It explains his grade in Spanish class. But he did say that you kicked their butts quite well before being overcome only by sheer numbers."

That's when I couldn't keep the disbelief from my face. "Me? Not Mark?"

She nodded and leaned back. "Apparently you left quite the impression on our little troll."

We were interrupted by a white coat entering my room. "Well, Casidhe, ready to get out of this joint?"

I smiled. "Nothing against you, Doc, but if I ever see another hospital, it better be because I'm in labor."

Chloe snorted. I wonder why?

The Doctor grinned. "No offense taken. Now, how about we lose those bandages and fit you with this neat little shield."

Thank god!

He set a box down on the rollie-table that hovers above the bed and produced a blunt set of scissors. I leaned up, under my own strength and moved my legs to the side, so that he could get a better angle at me.

"Miss, would you mind getting the shades and the lights, I don't want to overwhelm Casidhe's eye just at first."

"Sure!" Chloe jumped up and killed the lights before winding the mini blinds closed. "That good?"

"Perfect, thank you," said the doctor as he was halfway unwinding the bandages surrounding my head. "Okay, almost there. Now I want you to keep your eye closed until I say so, Casidhe. I want to make sure everything is well on its way before we mess around."

"Okay," I muttered. I went ahead and closed the other eye so I wouldn't be tempted. After another minute I felt the cool air of the room touch my face for the first time in five days.

"Stay right there, Casidhe, I'm going to clean you up a little." I heard some movement and a drawer open and close. "This is just distilled water. I'm going to dab at your eye so you won't have trouble opening it up."

"'kay."

The skin around my eye was uber-sensitive, but the cool, wet gauze felt good.

"The stitches look very good. I don't think you'll see much scarring if any at all."

A breath I didn't know I was holding, released, and was replaced with a little grin.

"Alright, are you ready?"

"Uh huh."

"I'm holding my hand over your eye right now. When you open it up, if it hurts I want you to close it back and relax, okay?"

"Uh huh."

"Okay, go ahead."

As slow as I dared I cracked both eyes open. Expectedly, I could see out of the right, just fine. The left was dark, but it didn't hurt.

"Any pain?"

"No," I whispered. I don't know why.

"I'm going to remove my hand now."

The smell of the latex glove he was wearing was annoying my nose. A second later his hand was gone and I finally had depth perception, because I could see out of both eyes again.

Chloe squeezed my hand, which I don't remember taking.

"Cas?"

"Yeah?" A grin split my face. "I can see."


~O~

The Doctor arranged a real eye exam to make sure that everything was where it was supposed to be. With my kind of injury, detached retinas aren't uncommon. The minor fact that I could see without any fuzziness or fuzzy spot in my vision was a very good sign. The checkup was a preventative measure.

The weird thing was the funky mask I got to wear. The cracks around the orbit of my eye were still healing and would be for a little while. As long as I didn't bash my head against the wall or faceplant into random tables, I should be fine. Of course, my particular doctor had to be one of a group that was conducting a protective face mask trial for use with people that had facial injuries.

It was a molded mask that would fit over the majority of the left side of my face, with little absorption points where, if I were to be accidentally hit, would spread out the shock away from the original injury.

In short, I was the Phantomess of the Opera for another three to four weeks. The good thing? I had a nice little eye hole I could see out of.


~O~

Rolling around in a power chair is starting to suck rocks. If only my arm wasn't broken, I could use crutches. Susan and Michael offered to let me stay with them, but being the independent and stubborn soul I am, I chose to see how I could get by.

The question I know you are asking is, 'Casidhe, how are you getting up and down those stairs?' Was I right? Well, if you look to the right of the kitchen as you are exiting, you'll see a fairly wide door. Remember Gramps' problem with arthritis? The mini elevator is slow as sin, but it works, and it empties into the master bedroom, which I am considering moving into more and more each passing day.

My bedroom is all well and good for sleeping, and doing my make up, but there really isn't a whole lot of room to move around in a power chair.

With that idea in the back of my mind I made plans to finally go through and box up the master bedroom. Have you ever tried to unfold and tape a box with only one hand? I have so much more sympathy and respect for people with disabilities. I hereby promise never to curse the jerks that make sure the best parking spots are always taken up by handicapped spaces. They have enough to deal with without having to find a decent place to park.

I will tell you this. Using my Gramps' bathroom to take a shower is really weird. He was already set up with the safety bars all over the bathroom and also had one of those shower seats with an extendo showerhead hose so I didn't have to get my bandages wet with my sorry attempts to bathe. Forget trying to wash my hair. The good thing was that I didn't smell like a hospital anymore.

My first day wasn't even done yet before I was passed out in front of the television not watching anything.


~O~

"Cas?"

I blinked away my sleepy eyes when I saw Chloe hovering over me. "Hey."

"Cas, what are you doing down here in the dark?"

A quick look around and I realized it was night time and, yes, I was sitting in the dark.

"Musta fell asleep."

The face Chloe made let me know that she didn't believe a word I was saying. "Honey, you were staring straight ahead, at nothing." When I didn't respond she held out her hand for me. "Come on, lets get you upstairs and in bed."

I was getting much better about pivoting around everywhere. I could turn with the best of them, it was the whole going in a straight line thing that was a problem. I stood up a little and shifted into the chair. While I was navigating the living room, Chloe had the door to the elevator opened and was waiting for me.

"You want to come try out school tomorrow?"

I shook my head as I backed up into the small enclosure. "I can't go like this, Chloe. I'd feel like a freak."

If I weren't already hurt I'd swear Chloe would have smacked me. "Everyone's asking about you and Mark. They know what happened. Nobody would make fun, and if they did, I'd beat the crap out of them."

"No." Don't ask me why I was being short with her. I really don't know why, myself.

"Okay. Just thought I'd ask."

I sighed. "I'm sorry, Chloe. I…"

She leaned down and kissed me on the cheek. "You don't have to explain. You'll come when you're ready."

My eyes burned, signaling another round of tears soon on their way. "I really was asleep earlier."

Our conversation was cut off from the door opening. See, I told you the elevator was slow. Chloe tossed open the outer door and I made my way through Gramps' room into the hallway. I wiped at my face with my injured arm, trying to not let Chloe see.

While I made a stop at the bathroom, Chloe puttered around in the bedroom.

"Want me to bring you something to wear?"

"Thank you. Anything is fine."

I have a preponderance of babydolls. I think I bought out the local Victoria's Secret's supply. So, I already knew what she was going to bring me. A light knock on the door and a hand slipped through to set one on the counter.

"Thanks."

Luckily it was a small bathroom. I reached over and found the panties. My knee wasn't able to bend more than a few degrees without pain. You never really realize how much it sucks having to stick your leg out everywhere you go. But the doctor said I needed to work the stiffness out and should be up on my feet in a week or so with the use of a crutch or cane for balance. Apparently it was up to me and how much pain I was willing to take.

When I slipped the babydoll over my shoulders, I spun around and dropped into the chair again.

She was waiting for me when I got back into the room. It was looking like she wanted to help me into bed, but I held her off with a hand. "I got it." It was just a pivot move after all. I have those down.

Right when I bounced down onto the bed I cringed. "Dammit, I forgot my meds."

Chloe was halfway to the door already. "I saw them in the kitchen. I'll be right back."

My shoulders slumped, and I smiled at her retreating figure out the door. I think the luckiest day in my life was when I met Chloe. Friendship comes in many different guises, but what she had shown me over the last few months was well above what I'd ever experienced before.

It wasn't even a minute before I heard her pounding back up the stairs with a glass of water and two prescription bottles. She stopped when she entered the room, and stared at me. "What?"

I didn't care about her seeing the burning in my eyes anymore. Holding out my only good hand I called to her. She gave me a silly look and set the meds and water on the nightstand before me.

My arm wrapped around her back and I set my face to the side on her chest. "You're the bestest friend in the world. You know that, right?"

Chloe's hands wrapped around my head and through my hair. "What's wrong, Casidhe?" Concern bled through her voice.

I sniffled a little and tried to snuggle tighter. "I can't get it out of my head that I almost lost him, Chlo." Breathing out the rest of my kept breath, I shuttered. "We just found each other, and we just got through having the best day of my life. Then it was over, almost."

"Oh, sweetie."

My body shuttered at the thought, once more. "It just hit me, downstairs. I woke up and everything was dark. I was alone. It was the worst feeling."

Chloe tried pulling back, but I wouldn't let her go.

"I've been alone for so long, Chloe. Even when Gramps was here, it wasn't the same as when I could go to my mom, and she would make things better."

Her hand, petting my head in soothing motions, calmed me a little.

"And then you came into my life. I had a real friend."

"I'll always be your friend, Cas. You know that."

With a small nod I squeezed her a little harder. "And now Mark is there too." After swallowing to clear my throat I sighed. "Am I going nuts, Chlo? Am I rushing things too much?"

Her petting stopped. "Truth?"

"Yeah?" I whispered.

She didn't wait. "Probably… but you've always done things your own way, Cas. Hell, your sixteenth birthday is tomorrow. You've got time."

I nodded, letting her know that I knew.

"You aren't getting your operation until December, right?"

"Uh huh."

"And I seriously doubt you are going to wait much longer to take him to bed for some serious Casidhe lovin', right?"

A giggle jumped out of me. "Uh huh."

"Well, why don't you wait at least until then to make a decision about the rest of your life."

My grip eased on my best friend and she pulled back to take a look at my face.

"I don't want to lose him."

She looked at me wistfully. "He's got a broken hip. I think you can out run him pretty well, even being all cripple-girl."

My eyes rolled. "You know what I mean."

"I know," she confirmed as she turned to the end table and fetched my meds. After swallowing them down and returning the glass to the table, Chloe sat down beside me and took my hand. "Cas, I know you two love each other and everything. You're going to go through a rough time here in the near future. Mark's gonna need some serious physical therapy and if the after school specials are anything like real life then he's going to have an even rougher time."

My lips pursed together in trepidation.

"You need to get yourself well, physically and mentally. He's going to need you, and you can't do that holed up in this place. You need to get back to school, back into your routine, as much as you are able. He's gonna need the Casidhe we all know and love, bouncing around…"

She looked at me and shrugged. "Well, in your case hobbling around."

With a frown, I smacked her. "Bitch."

I got a grin in return. "Now, lay down. I'm gonna go change."

Puzzled face appeared from me. "You're staying here tonight?"

"See, that blow to the head made you stupid. Of course I'm staying. You're my best friend, I love you."

Photo Credit: Olga http://mgpg.wordpress.com/2006/09/25/olga-super-red/



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