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I'd really like to have my daughter and her family over but even after all these years I am apprehensive about being enfem when she comes. I do not own male clothing and almost never wear anything but skirts and dresses. My breasts are very noticeable, so short of binding them, as if...
I won't forcibly thrust my life style on her.
Gwen
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Coming Sunday Afternoon...
I just made plans with her on FB. She is very sure that my skirts are OK. Should I believe her? Post op and all and still no guts.
Be who you have ALWAYS been!
Even when you were pretending to be a male! In your soul you have always been GWEN. Let the chips fall where they may, pretending to be what you are NOT will fail.
Your daughter will either understand, or she won't, but you will only harm yourself by trying to be what you aren't. Sometimes you either have to fish or cut bait. Let your daughter see the REAL you, the lovable, slightly goofy, talented writer with a big heart and NEVER apologise for being your real self!
For years you were forced to play a role that didn't fit who you truly are and it harmed you physically and psychologically. Face your fears with the strong, beautiful heart I know you have. I have grown to know and love Gwen as a friend, over the years, and I know you can do this. I am always here for you.
your friend,
Catherine Linda Michel
As a T-woman, I do have a Y chromosome... it's just in cursive, pink script.
Absolutely Supportive
She (my youngest daughter) contacted me again about 2 or so years ago and said that she had not been able to because of her butt hole husband. She's divorced now, so she can do as she wishes. She told me that she never felt that the way my X and two other children got rid of me never felt right to her. I'd had a breakdown and the family and the Church condemned me. It turned into a whole nightmare but it seems that the last decade have been much better. I don't need to speak about the whole sick litany save to say that perhaps I needed to be out of that pretend family.
In the end we all need people
In the end we all need people. We are a long time dead. While we are here we should spend as much time with our loved ones as we can. She will need you or you will need her along the line. She'll have to see you sometime. You are still her Dad, not matter how much your appearance has changed. If you were in a wheelchair with limbs missing still her father. I'm sure when you meet it will be wonderful.
As far as church goes in the UK Church Of England there is no problem with trans.
In July 2017, the Church of England’s General Synod debated the Blackburn Motion:
That this Synod, recognising the need for transgender people to be welcomed and affirmed in their parish church, call on the House of Bishops to consider whether some nationally commended liturgical materials might be prepared to mark a person's gender transition.
The Blackburn Motion passed with a significant majority in all three Houses: Bishops: 30 for, 2 against, 2 abstentions; Clergy: 127 for, 28 against, 16 abstentions; Laity: 127 for, 48 against, 8 abstentions.
After due consideration, in December 2018, the House of Bishops issued its Pastoral Guidance for use in conjunction with the Affirmation of Baptismal Faith in the context of gender transition which states unequivocally in its opening paragraph:
The Church of England welcomes and encourages the unconditional affirmation of trans people, equally with all people, within the body of Christ, and rejoices in the diversity of that body into which all Christians have been baptized by one Spirit.
http://www.unadulteratedlove.net/blog/2021/7/20/weve-made-ou...
Best of luck you brave woman x
Leeanna
A very different approach
to the so-called fundamentalist churches in the USA. Very enlightening attitude.
Samantha
American Churches.
They are far from God to me.
UK Church Of England
The UK Church Of England is the official state religion . Attendance is not high, we tend not to be a religious lot here. Christenings, weddings and funerals mainly.
I have met many a nice vicar. As they can marry they don't have the "molesty" problem thing that happens with the Catholic church. I have heard France has that problem today.
Leeanna
Is celibacy really the problem?
And that if a person goes long enough without getting laid they'll become inclined to molest children? It's been several decades since I've been intimate with another human being and I'm still not the least bit drawn to kids sexually, and don't think I would be if I went another century without sex. And this idea that letting priests marry can prevent kids from being abused doesn't explain the alarming number of adult (mostly) males who commit these horrors in spite of being married and conventionally sexually active. I think it might be something about the culture of the Catholic Church, it's heirarchy and social philosophy that attracts pedophiles to their ranks, although I can't say what. I'm inclined to blame the PATRIARCHY, but then I blame them when I burn my toast...
And I suspect that despite all the cases in the news, the percentage of molester priests isn't much higher than any other religious or secular organization or professions that put adults in contact with children. And sadly the omerta situation that has the church covering for these monsters like they're more concerned with avoiding scandal than they are with the suffering of the victims isn't exclusive to Catholicism either. High schools do the same thing because, you know, football is so fucking imporant and Coach Pervo is gonna lead us to the finals.
Maybe the Catholics are just worse at covering it up; or maybe Protestants and such who do have kids don't get caught as often because they're violating their own sons and daughters, and can control them with guilt and fear ("If you tell it will destroy this family, and it will be YOUR fault-") into keeping silent about it. Saying the problem belongs mostly to that group over there (those Godless "anything goes" liberals; those repressed uptight hypocritical conservatives) and has nothing to do with anyone I know or can relate to in any way is a comforting fiction that allows us to see this crime most of us hate to even think about as something that's distant and alien; but it's a fiction that keeps kids at risk.
It's a fucked up situation but any solution that would keep kids completely safe would be horrible in its own way- a culture with rules regulating who gets to be around childrens that to me would be as messed up as Islam's separation of the genders under Sharia law and would have its own long term devastating consequences, making everyone even more paranoid and isolated than we already are. So don't be paranoid, but don't be stupid and lump the whole thing onto "those people" or believe there's a "type" that you can spot because they have a certain type of moustache or wear their pants too high. The one pedophile who confessed his proclivities to me (This was around 1988; he confessed his attraction to little girls but swore he was managing not to act on it...) seemed otherwise totally cool, was very handsome with great hair (so it wasn't a matter of not being able to bed an adult woman,) and I never would have guessed...
~hugs, Veronica
What borders on stupidity?
Canada and Mexico.
.
Sorry
My comment in no way minimizes sexual abuse by any clergy; catholic or otherwise.
BUT
The overall 'offense' rate is no different with any denomination vs. laity. 4-5% of ALL males will sexually abuse a child. The celibacy issue only applies to non-celibate relationships by priest with consenting adults; mostly attributed to disqualification for non-celibate clerics. The lying regading non-celibacy fostered a secrecy that enables abuse, but is not the cause.
In other words, priests don't 'become' abusers; abusers enter the clergy through seminaries already inclined to obfuscate. The total failure extends to schools, government agencies, scouts and other youth organizations; ANYWHERE an adult is in a trusted position to groom a child. The argument against celibacy is complex, and has much more to do with ministers having more relevancy in family counseling and marriage counseling along with personal freedom to marry. 1+% females offend.
https://www.ywca.org/wp-content/uploads/WWV-CSA-Fact-Sheet-F...
96 percent of people who sexually abuse children are male, 76 percent are married men and 76.8 percent of people who sexually abuse children are adults.
A common myth is that child sexual abuse is perpetrated by strangers and pedophiles. But most
people who sexually abuse children are our friends, partners, family members, and community
members. About 93 percent of children who are victims of sexual abuse know their abuser. Less than 10 percent of sexually abused children are abused by a stranger.
Both my sister and I were abused by our mother's brother and seperately by our father. I was also abused by a 'retired' Boy Scout Master, while she was raped by our next door neighbor. All four men were already trusted by us.
Love, Andrea Lena