I looked long and hard at the Duchess of the Spring Court. “Spirit-shepherd, what does that mean, exactly?”

“Precisely what it sounds like, I would imagine,” Sahnae replied with a shrug and a patient smile. “I know that they can see and speak to spirits, help them move on to the spirit world, and can even physically interact with them to some degree, but my knowledge on the topic is limited. Her duties, other abilities, and the role that Inari wishes for her to play, these Rei shall have to discover for herself. Inari will speak with her when the time is right. I can only help prepare her for the journey.”

I sighed as I turned to look over my slumbering fiancée. I had been hoping for more immediate and detailed answers, but at least I had gotten something. “I guess I’m just worried about her, it was a pretty sudden change.”

“Taelya, you more than anyone should be able to embrace change,” the green-haired Fae pointed out. “Amoiraishe has said that you have changed much since you first awoke in this virtual environment, and yet you are thriving. Life, the universe, and magick, all of these are in constant change, it is their very nature. Rei is changing, you are changing, your friends are changing, this virtual world is changing, and even the world outside is changing. We cannot stop change, merely observe it, and sometimes guide it in a direction that is perhaps not so frightening.”

I’m not afraid of change,” I said with a shake of my head. “I’m afraid of those I care about being hurt. They’ve all found themselves, or something important to them in this game. They’re happy with who they are and I guess this has made me start thinking about what we could all lose.” If the game ended then close to two hundred and fifty people on Autumn Server alone could lose something special and if there was more than just a game going on, we’d probably all still lose something. But then they had chosen mostly loners, gamers, and social misfits for a reason. We wouldn’t really be missed all that much, except in some cases by one another.

Rei had begun to stir as we spoke, shifting and mumbling a bit, and now she sat up to peer intently at us both. “You worry too much Tae, about everyone around you. You’ve always been that way. It was one of the things that attracted me to Caleb. You didn’t really understand most other people and they often got under your skin with their selfishness or stupidity, but you still cared, helped when you could, and then worried whether it was enough. Even your anxiety showed that. You’d start panicking, thinking about the right way to respond to a person and I could almost see you going through all these different scenarios in your head trying to find the right thing to say. Then you’d end up freezing up and unable to say anything. It wasn’t because you were afraid that you’d look stupid or insensitive, but because you were afraid that the person could take offense, that you would hurt them. Sahnae is right though, we’re all changing, especially you.”

“You’re awake,” I stated the obvious in a mix of relief and uncertainty. The relief was because she was awake and seemingly fine. Sure she had pulled this before and been fine, but the whole spirit-shepherd thing was still kind of throwing me for a loop. The uncertainty though was from so many worries whirling about inside my chest, like a blender was mixing them into one big anxiety smoothie. I was worried about all of the things that didn’t add up about this game, my suspicions, and that none of the conclusions I was drawing made sense. Sahnae’s comments about change and her insistence that I talk to and try to forgive Narek was just more fuel on the fire. I was worried that I had changed, I could see some of the changes myself and it wasn’t just from being a girl, but were those changes good or bad? But most of all I was worried about us all having to go back to lives that would just end up making us miserable because we couldn’t put the genie back in the bottle and be the people we were before the game. What if it ended up driving us apart? I wouldn’t care if I lost everything else in my life but Rei, Nishalle, and the others, they were family and friends and they meant everything to me. I couldn’t lose that, and I didn’t think any of the others could either.

“You’re worrying about everyone again,” Rei said with a sigh.

“Yeah especially those of you who are only going to suffer back in the real world,” I admitted with a sigh of my own. “You, Lissany, Salem, and Daenyss worst of all. Nishalle won’t have an easy time either, she hasn’t changed much, not inside, but people don’t look down on her for being the way she is in the game, they respect it. Then there’s Lark having to go back to dodging the paparazzi all the time and having no time to really relax and hang with her friends. Thinking about all of you going back to that, it pains me, and I can’t help but wonder, have I changed too much? What if I can’t go back to being Caleb?”

Rei slipped the covers off and crawled over the bed to kiss me tenderly, holding my face and gazing lovingly at me as our lips parted. “You’ve changed, but at the core, you’re still you and I think all of your changes have been positive. You’re confident and at ease with yourself, you’re not afraid to take charge and do something when you see something isn’t right. Before you used to bottle up your feelings and now you wear your heart on your sleeve. People would do anything for you because they know that you’d do the same for them. I didn’t think I could love you more before we came into this game, but I was wrong. You’ve become this amazing person that I always knew was inside and now that she’s out there for everyone to see I’ve fallen for you even harder and in an entirely new way. I wasn’t in love with you because you were Caleb, I fell in love with who you were inside, the you that I now see in Taelya every day. I don’t want to think about what happens when we leave here, let’s just… hold on to this as long as we can. We’ll deal with reality, and whatever is waiting for us out there, when it happens.”

Sahnae sighed and it looked like she wanted to say something, but she held off. To be honest I had almost forgotten that she was there with us as I gazed into Rei’s dark chocolate eyes. “Was there something that you wanted to tell us?” I asked pointedly, hoping that maybe she would give me the answers that I needed.

The Spring Court Yseil'dhraí shook her head sadly. “Nothing that I can tell you, but you’ll find out soon.”

I nodded my head and shrugged my shoulders, not terribly surprised by her reply. I figured that she was probably oath-bound, just as Kinara was. Still, there were others who I could ask my questions of and other questions to ask now as well. “Thanks for being honest about it, Sahnae, and I do appreciate your advice. Do you think that you could teach Rei more about her Kitsune heritage and what she should expect as a spirit-shepherd?”

A subtle nod and a smile were her immediate answer, followed quickly by the words, “Of course, Taelya. I am afraid that many answers she must seek to her own but I will gladly share with what knowledge I possess and guide her along her path until a more suitable teacher can be found.” They began speaking back and forth then in rapid Japanese that my limited exposure to anime couldn’t come close to helping me follow.

I had to search for my own answers anyway though so I quickly excused myself. “I have some other things to do so I’ll leave the two of you to it. I’ll have someone bring you up something to eat though sweetheart, you must be starving.”

“Thanks, Babe,” Rei replied, leaning over to kiss me once again before I could leave.

I found Daenyss with Salem, talking with Amoiraishe in the ‘throne room’. I could have just called her name to summon her to my side, but I didn’t like to do that unless it was really important. It was why I told Rei that I would get someone to bring her something rather than mentioning Daenyss by name. If I spoke her name she would hear it and she’d come regardless of what she was doing. I wanted her to have a life aside from serving me and time for herself once in a while. As my friend, she deserved that and she wouldn’t get it if I summoned her every time I needed something or had a hair out of place. Sometimes it was just better for me to search her out so that she knew that I cared about her needs as much as my own. If she was busy, or better yet relaxing for once, then I had two good hands and feet of my own to carry a tray of food.

Seeing that she was talking with my Mahair and the diminutive Moss Maiden I was about to slip out and take care of it on my own when Amoiraishe caught sight of me and smiled. “Taelya dear, are you here for your two skill downloads as well?”

Warmth spread across my cheeks in a flush as I looked down at my shoulder and gave Willow some affection to cover my embarrassment about being so absent-minded. “I actually kinda forgot about that, Mahair, I’ve had a lot on my mind. Rei is awake so I was going to ask Daenyss to bring some food up to her while I check on Níala and take her something.”

“I would be happy to, Mistress,” Daenyss replied with a smile. “Her Majesty already gave me my skills so I can go do that while you’re receiving yours.”

Salem quickly added, “And don’t worry about Níala, Taelya. I’ll go with Daenyss and take something up for her. I wanted to check on her and make sure that she’s not feeling any lingering effects or trauma from her ordeal anyway.”

“Thanks, both of you,” I replied, hugging each of the pair in turn and causing a weak protest from the Wisp being jostled on my shoulder. “So, what did you take for skills?”

“I kinda figured since I’m Fae now that I should take Fae Culture and Elvish Language. I still had a skill from my last level up too, so Daenyss suggested… umm… Faerie Dance as well. Getting three downloads at once was a bit of a rush, so we were just chatting while my head cleared.” It was hard to tell with her mossy skin but Salem seemed a bit self-conscious about that last skill, her body language making it seem like she was nervous about something.

“Nishalle suggested that I take another gun-related skill since I seem to be doing pretty well with them. I guess she thought a second sniper could help cover the party in some situations. And it could be useful if she needs to be by your side and I don’t so I could cover you. I guess my other skill doesn’t really have a name,” Daenyss provided, looking toward Amoiraishe uncertainly.

“I had a skill-download compiled just for Daenyss,” my Mahair said, smiling at the Nymph. “I wanted to give her a general knowledge of some of the more important and common aspects of modern North American culture to help her cope when we have to return to the real world. Things that we take for granted, such as the value of money, everyday technology, and things she would have learned in school. I can’t replace what she lost, but I wanted to give her a good start for her life outside the game.”

“That sounds like a big download, do you feel okay Daenyss? Maybe you should rest and let your mind absorb it all,” I said, stopping my gentle stroking of Willow as I gave my Attendant a worried look.

“I feel fine, Mistress, please don’t worry. Her Majesty said I’ll probably dream a lot for a while though, while my mind tries to make sense of it all in my sleep. We’ll go take some food up to Rei and Níala and then we’ll take it easy for the rest of the evening unless you need me for something,” Daenyss promised. “Salem and I were just going to hang out in her room and get to know one another better anyway.”

My eyes widened a bit and I tried and probably failed, to hide a smile. Between the Nymph’s heady scent of arousal and Salem’s awkwardness, I was pretty certain that they were going to ‘get to know one another better’ in the Fae manner and would likely be testing out the new skill that Daenyss had suggested to the Liyun'shael for the rest of the night. I did manage not to giggle though as I winked at my Attendant. “Okay, I don’t think I’ll need you for anything else tonight Daenyss, so you have the rest of the night off after delivering those meals. Enjoy yourselves, girls.”

“Thank you, Mistress. I will see you in the morning,” Daenyss replied with a grateful smile. The two bowed and then headed off toward the kitchen, Salem reaching out to take Daenyss’s hand almost timidly as the Nymph walked off with a little extra wiggle in her step.

I merely smiled as I watched them walk off, happy that they were becoming so close. At least they would have the time to find a few moments of happiness with one another before we all had to go back to reality. “Thank you for doing that for Daenyss, Mahair.”

“It is my fault that she lost her memories,” the Fae Queen said with a pained expression. “That debt had to be paid before she returns to the outside world. I know that you were uncertain about her at first, but she needed this chance at a new life after what she lost.”

“Yeah, I was,” I admitted, “but I’m glad that you did it. She’s been a great Attendant and an even better friend. I’m going to miss her and the others when we return to the real world.” I sighed, knowing that what I had to ask might hurt her, and I didn’t want to do that. Even if it weren’t for the ‘Taelya’ memories telling me that I was her daughter, just the way that she treated Nishalle and me, the way she interacted with us, would have made me think of her as a mother. “Are we going back to the real world? You chose misfits and loners to test this game for a reason didn’t you?”

I could see from the look in her eyes that the accusation hurt, probably more so because of how accurate it was. “I also chose some of my employees, people I call friends,” she reminded me softly. “It is true that I chose most people based on them having few connections to people in the real world or people that were close to me. Perhaps this was in part because you wouldn’t be missed as much by the world at large, but I also wanted you all to form bonds of friendship and camaraderie here. We will return to the outside world, that I promise you, and when we do we will need the friends, family, and companions that we have made here. The Americans are watching the New York office like rats trying to figure out how to safely steal the cheese from a mousetrap. They will try to make their move soon, they feel that they need our technology too badly not to. Do you really think that anyone connected to this project will be safe after this with the knowledge that we’ve given you?”

She promised, and so like a dutiful daughter I believed in that promise, but she was also right, even taking magick-related skills out of the equation there were people like my sister. Even without her Tokh'dhraí abilities, she would still leave the game with all the skills and knowledge of a master assassin. “They’d round up all of the American players, interrogate them, and then draft the useful ones. They’d probably stick the rest in a dark hole somewhere because they wouldn’t really be missed anyway and could be considered ‘dangerous’. And if our governments were to find out, the same would probably happen to those of us on the other servers as well. Why would you start all of this if you knew this was going to happen?”

Amoiraishe shook her head sadly. “I didn’t know. As I have said before, seeing more than thirty seconds into the future is difficult and the machinations of other people can greatly change things. There was no certainty that this would happen and events in the outside world have changed things. It wouldn’t have happened if the board hadn’t pushed selling the technology. I was following my vision, trying to make the world a better place, and make better lives for those of you who needed them.”

“You keep talking about following your damn vision, but that doesn’t tell me anything. What is this it that you want? Why are you so dead set on doing whatever it is you’re doing and what the hell do you plan on doing once we’re out of here?! From what it sounds like, your vision is putting all of us in danger!” I was getting tired of not getting any straight answers and from the sounds of it, it wasn’t just her company’s assets that were in danger now. Willow shifted hastily on my shoulder, disturbed by either my anger or the outburst itself, I wasn’t quite sure which.

My Mahair shook her head, placing a finger to my lips to hush my protests. “I know that you want answers, little rose, and I want to give them to you, but that time has not yet come. You shall have them soon, I will answer all of your questions when the Red Dawn event is over.”

“That could be after the server goes down,” I countered.

“No,” she said, shaking her head. “The Redcaps will attack the village in force tomorrow night after dark and, no matter what happens in that battle, this chapter of our lives will draw to a close soon after.”

“Tomorrow? You’re sure about that?” My heart began to race as I considered how the hell we were going to take down an entire clan of Redcaps at once. My party had had trouble with just four of them and three of them hadn’t even been all that strong.

“All the signs are pointing that way,” Amoiraishe confirmed. “Everyone from your party has already chosen their new skills except for you and Rei, you should do so as well if you want to be prepared. Have you given it any thought?”

I hadn’t, but I did have a few ideas. “What do you think about Military Tactics and Japanese Language? I figure that the first might be useful in the battle, maybe I can figure out some sort of strategy to use against the Redcaps.”

“And Japanese because Rei is now fluent in it and you want to be able to share that?” she suggested playfully.

I just shrugged since I didn’t see any reason to be ashamed of that. “Well, it might also be useful if we ever travel, and I wouldn’t have to wait for the really good manga and anime to be translated.”

Amoiraishe stared off into space for a moment and then placed her hands on either side of my head. As usual, the rush of unfamiliar memories playing through my head on fast-forward left me feeling slightly dizzy and full of new knowledge once the deed was done. When my vision had cleared she was still cupping my face in her hands. She gave me a long look, a war of emotions being fought within her golden eyes. Finally, she let go of my face to wrap me up in a tight embrace as she whispered softly in my ear. “Taelya, aine vehl amistriel. Even should you, your sister, and the others hate me for what I have done, please know that my feelings for you will not change my little rose. I have only done what I had to do, for all of us.”

It was the first time that she had said those words to me out loud and her saying them in Elvish seemed to make it all the more personal and meaningful. “I… love you too, Mahair.” I thought about the words as I spoke them and I found that I really did mean it. I knew that she meant what she said too, she would never purposely hurt any of us, at least not without a very good reason. “You… ummm… keep calling me your little rose, even in my dreams.”

She almost pulled away from our embrace. “Does it bother you, Taelya? It was something that I used to call Rhaennan and you remind me of her a lot sometimes. You look a lot like she did and she could be willful and stubborn too. I guess I just fell into the habit, but it does suit you.”

I shook my head against her shoulder, unwilling to break the hug for the moment. “I don’t mind, so long as it isn’t a painful reminder or anything. It felt a little weird at first, but now it feels, sort of right. Maybe it’s just because of the dreams reinforcing it, but it makes me feel special. Does Nishalle have a pet name too?” I inquired, genuinely curious.

She actually laughed at my question, a throaty giggle that almost made me feel like when she would laugh at something cute I did when I was a child. Even though I knew that the memories weren’t really real, it made me feel so connected to her. “Yes, little rose, Nishalle has a pet name too, she’s my little thorn. She can be prickly and she doesn’t get noticed as much as you, in fact, she prefers to stay mostly hidden in your shadow, but I know that she will never leave your side or stop protecting you. I would have liked for her to have chosen to become Yseil'dhraí when the two of you and Rei decided to join the game, but in hindsight, I think she chose appropriately. I think that you both did.”

“She’s always been that way, sticking by my side and trying to protect me from the world. She’s the younger of us, but you’d never know it the way she acts,” I said laughing as I finally broke the hug.

“She thinks the world of you,” Amoiraishe said with a distant smile. “She told me and April often enough about how much she hated that you weren’t living up to your potential and hiding in a job that you hated and were overqualified for. She worried about you and your fiancée a lot, she just wanted to see you both happy. You should have seen her face light up when she came out of her first playtest of the game and I told her about the Kitsune race. I could just see the determination to get you both in the game written all over her face.”

As much as I liked this closeness with her, I still had the whole Narek situation to deal with and I would also need to figure out some sort of plan for when the Redcaps attacked the next night. “That sounds like her,” I said with a lazy smile. “I should get going though, Mahair, I have a lot to do, Thanks for the skills, and the talk. Just remember that once we’re done with those Redcaps I’ll be holding you to your word.”

She nodded and we both reluctantly parted. “I welcome spending time with you whenever I can, little rose. You will have your answers as promised, you may not like them, but you shall have them. I should be going anyway, I shall see if Rei is ready to choose her skills and then I should make the rounds of the other players in the Glade to give them their skills as well. Everyone will need to be ready when night falls tomorrow.”

Narek wasn’t in his room, or the stables, or anywhere else that I could think to look for him. Finally, I made my way to the recreation room, hoping that my Pájar might actually be relaxing for once. He wasn’t there either but most of my party-mates were, with the notable exceptions of Rei, Salem, Daenyss, and Venika. Lissany and Kinara were snuggled up on one end of the couch gently petting Silverheels and Kimmie, so I gathered that Lissany was Wisp-sitting for her absent mother.

Rob and Lark cuddled on the other end of the couch as Lark hummed softly. Pete was teaching Nishalle to play pool, holding her close from behind and showing her how to handle the stick. Really? Those two just needed to have sex and get it over with, especially since I knew damn well that Nishalle knew how to play pool. She had made quite a bit of extra money in college by hustling people at pubs and pool halls. To my surprise Ashura was there as well, snuggling in an overstuffed armchair with Grell as they talked about something technical-sounding.

“Hey everyone,” I called out as placed them all, but alas no Narek. “You’ve been working on my special order with Hadrick and Denise, right Ashura? How are they coming along?”

“We have a prototype ready to go and we could have as many as three more ready to assemble once it’s been tested. We’ve had to scavenge some things to make it work, but I was also able to make some Artificer improvements to Denise’s design so it should be fine. The ammunition is the hard part, but Denise is sure that she and Lincoln can pump out a decent supply in a day or two.”

“They have until dark tomorrow,” I told her grimly. “That’s when the Redcaps will attack.”

“Well shit, I guess I should tell them to kick it into high gear then. We might just have to pull an all-nighter,” the Atlantean woman responded with a grimace as she stood up.

I felt bad about sending her off to work when she was getting a chance to relax and spend a bit of time with Grell. “I’m sorry, I wish I could give you more time, but my Mahair seems fairly certain that that is when the Redcaps will attack.”

“I’ll come with you Ashe, it sounds like you could use the extra hands,” Grell offered as he took her hand in his and led her out of the room calling over his shoulder, “Don’t wait up for me.”

“I guess the rest of us should enjoy the time off while we have it then,” my sister said with a sigh before turning around to grab Pete’s pool cue. She lined up a quick shot that sunk the three remaining striped balls on the table. Then before he could pick his jaw back up she sank the eight ball with another shot, dropped the cue on the table, and grabbed the large Human by the collar of his shirt. “As fun as it would be for me to let you ‘teach’ me how to play. I can think of much better ways to spend our evening. C’mon big boy, let me show you how I can handle another type of stick.” White teeth flashed in a grin, showing just a bit of fang and standing out against the dark blue of her skin as she half-dragged him from the room with a wicked glint in her crimson eyes.

Pete for his part seemed more than happy to be dragged along as he called out, “So… I guess I’ll see you all later then.”

“Much later,” Nishalle purred as the pair headed off toward her bedroom.

“Poor guy doesn’t know what he’s in for,” I muttered, trying not to laugh. Since Rob and I were now the only non-minors in the room I didn’t want to say anything more. Virgin ears and all that.

I was half-tempted to go scratch my own itch with Rei, but she was probably still getting lessons on the basics of being a spirit-shepherd and with Sahnae’s roundabout way of teaching, that could take a while. Instead, I took a seat right between the two couples on the couch. I started asking the others what they thought of the Redcaps and possible ways to fight them, but it wasn’t long before my eyelids began to droop. I just wanted to find Narek so he could tell me why he was avoiding me and what exactly I needed to forgive him for, but the jerk didn’t want to be found. Maybe if I just sat there long enough then he would come to me.

“She’s falling asleep,” Lark’s voice teased the edges of my consciousness.

“I’m not surprised, I would be too if I used that much power in a fight, I’m surprised she stayed awake as long as she did,” Kinara’s voice put in.

“I could carry her up to her room,” Rob offered. His voice paused for a moment before adding, “Actually I don’t want to do anything that might make her uncomfortable later. Maybe you should do it Lissany, you’re her Guardian after all.”

“I don’t want to risk waking her, she needs her rest. Let’s just get a blanket and cover her up,” the Beastkin girl’s voice countered. “I’ll take Willow so she doesn’t get hurt if Taelya changes position or something. Kinara already has two Wisps sleeping in her lap, what’s one more?”

The Jisa nir Faeshûin was a boring ceremony, and I was already bored from spending so long waiting to meet this Narek person. He was nothing like any other Fae I had met with his long white hair and pale blue eyes. He reminded me of the ice and snow that we sometimes got when the weather turned cold. The snow was fun to play in. Venika, Nishalle, and I had all had fun the last time we had some in the Glade. The ceremony was definitely not fun. Kneeling on the ground was uncomfortable, the thorn that Mahair poked my finger with hurt, and the sight of my blood dripping on the round stone table made me sick to my stomach.

I was unhappy that night when he had to return to the Winter Court. I wanted him to be able to stay so we could have more fun together and see each other all the time like other Fae with their Pájars. It wasn’t fair that he had to be so far away. He promised to visit as often as he could so we could spend time together and then he kissed me on the forehead and showed me the amber crystal hanging from his neck. “Remember, a part of you is always with me and a part of me is always with you.”

I was awoken by Venika’s anxious voice in my ear. “Taelya, I’m on the roof with Phinik, we were… enjoying the evening air together. That’s not important right now though, you need to get up here now!” A Wind Whisper spell, she probably hadn’t realized that I was asleep. I snapped right to attention and my fellow couch occupants nearly fell off in surprise as the blanket that I had been covered with fell to the floor. Kinara had barely managed to keep the Wisps from falling out of her lap as she jumped. The Wisps stirred briefly but apparently decided that it wasn’t worth waking up yet.

“Taelya, what’s wrong?” Lark asked. Her was face a mask of concern as she watched me.

“I don’t know, Venika just called me from the roof and it sounded urgent,” I quickly explained before thinking to ask, “How long was I out?”

“Maybe an hour,” Rob offered in answer to my query.

Lissany was focused on other matters though as her brow furrowed with worry. “Is Mom okay?”

“I’m sure she’s fine, she just said she needed me up there, I’ll be right back.” I wasn’t about to explain what her mother had probably been doing up there with Phinik and it had sounded urgent so I drew in mana and quickly started on the sigils for my single-person teleportation spell. “Kaida Venika!”

The cool evening air completed my journey to wakefulness as I appeared on the roof of the Estate near a pair of naked Sprites. Venika was pointing to the south so I turned to see what had her so concerned. Off in the distance, the darkness of the night was tainted by a malevolent orange glow. It was hazy and seemed to waver, but it was growing larger and more ominous with each passing second. I couldn’t blame the night air for the chill that slithered down my spine. Haven was burning.