Antonette's Story A novel by Bronwen Welsh Copyright 2020

Chapter 6   Our first date

The week seemed to drag because I was so looking forward to my first date with Gary. I had discussed with Mummy what I should wear. I wanted to wear a skirt of course, or maybe a dress, I just wasn't sure. I wouldn't be dressed up like I was for the school dance, but I still wanted to wear stockings and heels and look really feminine.

Mummy and I went through my wardrobe of clothes which was gradually increasing in size and variety, and we finally decided on a grey pleated skirt and a white silk slip over black, semi-sheer tights, since it was cold. I would be wearing a woollen top over a padded bra and camisole, I had already discovered that silk or nylon underwear and tights really kept me quite warm. I now had a couple of pairs of three-inch heels, so I decided on the black ones.

Friday evening arrived at long last and I hurried home from school so that I could take my time getting dressed, which for a girl is part of the enjoyment of going out When I was dressed and had attended to my hair and makeup, I examined myself in the mirror and was quite pleased with what I saw; Mummy approved too. She dropped me off at the cinema where I could see Gary waiting outside. We had arranged that Daddy would be back to pick me up after the film finished. I would have like Gary to bring me home since the cinema was only about a twenty-minute walk from where we lived, but I understood that Daddy was protective of me so I agreed to it without argument.

Mummy pulled the car into the kerbside and I got out in a ladylike fashion, legs together and skirt well down.

Gary's face broke into a broad smile when he saw me. Although I was on time, he confessed sometime later that he wasn't sure I would come as he'd been 'stood up' before. To my way of thinking that is an awful thing to do. If I ever changed my mind about going on a date, I hope I would have the decency to call the boy and let him down gently with some excuse.

“Hello Antonette, you do look nice,” he said.

“Thank you,” I replied. He wouldn't have had any idea about the amount of time I had spent on selecting what to wear and then getting ready on the day; boys usually don't, because it hardly takes them any time at all to get ready.

We walked into the multiplex together. It had six screens, so he asked me what film I would like to see. I scanned the display and saw that there was a 'girls' film' which I'd like to see, but I'm sure Mummy would like to go with me to see that one. There was also a 'Star Wars' movie, so I asked Gary if he'd like to see that, being fairly sure he would.

“Well, yes, I'd like to see it,” he said. “But is it something you'd like to see?”

“Just because I'm a girl, doesn't mean I don't like an adventure film,” I replied, and then wished I hadn't because he looked wounded. Oh dear, I seemed to have hurt his feelings. “I”m sorry, Gary, that didn't come out the way I intended, I hope you didn't think I was rude.”

He brightened. “No, it's fine.”

“It isn't, and I apologise,” I said. “Can I buy you a coffee while we wait for the session to start?”

Gary smiled. “I haven't been out with many girls to be honest, but you're not like any of them.”

'He knows!', I thought, and I'm sure I turned pale because he looked quite concerned and asked if I was alright.

I forced myself to say.”I'm fine thank you, Gary. What did you mean about me not being like other girls?” ('Might as well get it out in the open,' I thought)

"What I mean is you are very smart and so pretty, and I can't figure out why you don't already have a boyfriend,” he replied.

“Maybe I was waiting for the right boy to come along,” I replied, and I kissed him on the cheek. He beamed and I thought that at last, I'd done something right.

Gary insisted on buying the tickets so I paid for the coffee. Neither of us had a job so we were relying on pocket money.

We enjoyed our coffee and a chat and in no time we went to take our seats. I left it to Gary to decide where we should sit and he picked the centre of a row about halfway down the auditorium. I was thinking that maybe next time we'd sit in the back row, but in a way, I was pleased he hadn't suggested that.

I had a lot to learn about being a girl, there was a lot more to it than wearing pretty clothes, although that was a bonus of course. I was glad that for my first boyfriend I had found someone like Gary since I don't think he'd ever really had a girlfriend before, so didn't know what to expect from me. One of the things I was learning was that girls get what they want in a subtle way. For example, I really wanted him to hold my hand while we watched the film, so I casually put it on my lap within easy reach for him and then waited to see what happened. It took about fifteen minutes, but eventually, he did take hold of it, so I flashed him a smile and gave his hand a squeeze to show him that I was pleased that he had done it.

I did enjoy the film; it was a great adventure, in fact, a lot of people say the series is almost like the cowboy films of the fifties with well-defined good guys and bad guys but all happening in space of course. The violence is almost cartoon-like, there isn't blood and gore.

When it was finished and we were leaving our seats, I realised I had a problem; I really wanted Gary to ask me out again and I hoped he would take the initiative, but realising how shy he was I wasn't sure he would take that step. I enthused about how much I had enjoyed the film and he agreed with me. As we queued up to walk out of the cinema, I took the opportunity to take his hand and steer him out of the line of people.

“Gary, my Daddy is probably waiting for me in the foyer, so we had better say goodnight here.” Then, thank goodness he said something.

“Antonette, I've really enjoyed going out with you tonight, would you like to go out again, please?” I was so relieved, I nearly breathed a sigh of relief.

“I'd like that very much, Gary. I'm free next Sunday if you are? Maybe we could go to the Zoo, or a museum if it's raining? What do you think?”

“I'd really like that,” he said. I had really wanted to kiss him but had thought it was too soon. Now, without thinking, I leaned forward and gave him a brief kiss on the lips. He looked startled but very pleased. I think it was the first time a girl had kissed him, or he had kissed a girl for that matter.

“I'll ring you later in the week if that's ok,” he said.

“I'll look forward to it,” I replied.

We joined the queue of people leaving the cinema, and sure enough, Daddy was waiting for me in the foyer. I led Gary over and introduced him.

“Hello, Gary, it's nice to meet you,” said Daddy, shaking Gary's hand.

“It's nice to meet you too, sir,” said Gary.

“How was the film?” said Daddy.

Gary and I both started to answer at the same time, and then we stopped, and Daddy laughed.

“I'm guessing you really enjoyed it,” he said.

“Yes, we did,” I said. I said goodnight to Gary, and Daddy and I walked to where he had parked the car.

As we drove home he said: “Gary seems a nice boy.”

“He is!” I exclaimed, perhaps a little too enthusiastically.

Daddy laughed: “I'm guessing that's why you enjoyed the film so much.”

“Daddy!” I exclaimed, and he laughed. “I was young myself once, Antonette.”

On Monday, I caught up with April. In a short space of time, we had become real bosom buddies.

“How was your date with Gary?” she asked. “Did you kiss?”

She laughed. “No need to answer, your face says it all.”

“I didn't intend to,” I said. “Somehow it just happened.”

“That's the best sort of kiss,” she said. “I presume you are going out with him again?”

“Yes, we're going out next Sunday, either to the Zoo or a museum depending on the weather.”

“Great!” said April. “Isn't it fun having a boyfriend to go out with?”

“What about your date with Michael?” I said, changing the subject.

“It was great,” she replied. “He took me to the pictures too. We sat in the back row and yes, there was kissing, in fact quite a bit of it. I missed a lot of the film, but never mind.”

“April, I've so much to learn about being a girl,” I said. “But it's fun learning.”

“You've got a lot of catching up to do, but you're making good progress, and you're more feminine than some 'cis' girls I know.”

“What does 'cis' mean,” I asked.

“Girls who were born that way, in other words not 'trans',” she replied.

The following Sunday, after getting permission from both sets of parents, Gary came to pick me up at my house about nine o'clock and we took the underground train from Finsbury Park to Warren Street station and then walked to London Zoo in Regents Park. Being on a tight budget, we split the cost of the train fares and the entrance fees. I had got up early and made us a lunch of sandwiches and cake to take with a bottle of water each.

Although it was winter, the weather was very mild and sunny which pleased me because I much preferred to wear a skirt when going out with Gary. As soon as we were out of sight of my house, we held hands as we walked to the station. I felt so happy to be spending a whole day with my boyfriend and I'm sure Gary felt great being with his girlfriend because he told me so!

We had a wonderful day walking around the London Zoo and looking at all the animals. I brought along a little 35mm film camera that my parents had bought me as a birthday present For those too young to remember the days before digital cameras, the black and white film (I couldn't afford colour) came in rolls of twenty-four or thirty-six exposures. Besides buying the film, there was also the cost of having it processed and the 'postcard-size' prints made.

In some ways, I think that using film was better than the digital cameras we use now, as we thought about the pictures we were going to take, rather than firing off multiple digital shots in the hope of getting a good one as we tend to do today. Among the pictures I took, which included my favourite animals, elephants and giraffes, was one of Gary, and also one he took of me, but we really wanted a picture of us together. This was well before the days of 'selfies', so we looked for a likely person to take it for us, and saw a young couple, just a few years older than us, also walking around holding hands. The young man was happy to take a picture of us.

I still have the album in which I placed the pictures, using the little triangular stickers which were inserted at each corner of the print and then attached to the album page. I always wrote on the back, who was in the picture, and the place and date, and using this system it is easy to remove the prints to see the back of them. There is nothing more frustrating than looking at an old picture and not knowing who the people are. I knew it was us, but maybe one day, Jeanette's grandchildren will look at the old album with the quaint black and white photos of two young people in old-fashioned clothes, and wonder who they are. Checking the back of the picture will tell them that they are Gary White and Antonette Burton at Regents Park Zoo, and the date.

But, I digress. We had the most wonderful day, and the time flew by. In no time, we had to leave and walk back to the station and take the underground train back home as we had promised that I would be back by five o'clock.. The train was fairly empty, and at one point there was nobody in the carriage except us. We were cuddled up to each other, and as the train left the station, we looked at each other, and Gary leaned over and we started to kiss with our eyes closed. It wasn't a full-on French kiss, although our lips did part slightly and the tips of our tongues touched, but the kiss went on for a long time, right until we felt the train slowing for the next station, where unfortunately some people entered the carriage. We just looked at each other and smiled.

As I look back, I remember April's tale of her parents and 'April Love'. It was December when Gary and I went to the Zoo, but that experience of young love is something I'll never forget.

To be continued

Next time: 'Ae fond kiss'