Chapter 1.6

When my vision cleared, I looked down at myself.  My clothes were hanging loosely of my new frame, although a certain area of my shirt was rather tight.  My pants had split at the seam running up my backside, I found when I reached around to get an idea what my general shape was.  Yet, as I slowly started walking, I found that my boots were loose.

I knew I needed to call John and tell him what had happened, but the thought terrified me.  I didn't want to face him.  I started to think that maybe I’d run into a guy the same way I had the women, and be changed back, but I found I didn’t want to do that.  I was not scared of women now, but of men.  The funnel went the other way.

I pulled my shirt out of my pants, and let it hang down. It made an almost respectable minidress.   The waistband of my pants was holding tight on my hips, so as long as I didn’t perform any serious exercise I figured I could make it to my room.  But what then?  I didn’t have anything that would fit me there.  Then I remembered.  Across the hall from my apartment was a woman who was probably about my size now.  I might be able to borrow something from her.  

I was deliberately avoiding the thought of talking to either John or Marc.  I knew they would be as terrified of me as I was of them now.  I began to wonder if I touched a man, if they would become a woman.  Was my transformation so complete?  I had no way of knowing unless I touched a man.  I certainly didn’t want to do that.  Coming so close to one scared the living daylights out of me.

I got to the corridor above or below, however you looked at it, and looked to the right.  The bay door was there that would take me to my home.  Unfortunately, there were about a dozen men standing between me and the door.  They were in groups of two or three talking, presumably about the screwed up mess we were now in.  

I shrank back into the hallway to downstairs, my heart pounding in my chest.  What was I going to do?  The thought of passing all those men was horrifying!  I felt like I had to pass within striking distance of a viper.  My problem was solved, however, when a man suddenly turned into the corridor I was in to head downstairs.  He jumped back as if bitten by a similar snake.  “Woman!” he shouted.  He spun on his heel and ran away.  I heard what sounded like a stampede, and cautiously peeked out of my hiding place.  I was tensed to turn and flee as fast as I possibly could, but I needn’t have worried.  Apparently the thought of a woman… of me… being near them made them run.  I stepped into the corridor and started toward the bay doors and home.

Before I turned into my bay, however, I stopped.  How many of those men had walked into here? I wondered.  Again, I apprehensively peeked around the corner.  The ‘street’ in between the buildings on either side was empty.  My home was about three quarters of the way down the street, on the right, and on the top floor.  I was scared to walk down that street.  I would be in the open, where anything could happen.  Slowly, I began to walk.  I felt like everyone’s eyes were upon me.  Indeed, I saw several curtains flutter in the apartments that started on the second floor.  One or two of the ‘stores’ (we didn’t have any money)  on the bottom level closed their blinds and turned the signs to closed.  

Oh yeah!  There was a boutique just up the street a bit.  Just passed the stairwell leading to my apartment.  I started to hurry a bit faster.  I wanted out of the street.  I passed the stairs, and a couple of stores down the street I stared in horror.  The boutique’s windows had been broken out.  There were some heavy chairs thrown through.  Much of the inventory had been destroyed, and there was no sign of life inside.

I decided I didn’t want to be on the street anymore if this was what we were coming to, turned and ran to the stairs.  Just before I reached them, I saw a man open the door of a liquor store that was adjacent to the stairs.  He lifted up a bottle and threw it at me.  I ducked and I felt it brush my hair.  A moment later, I was sprinting as fast as my ill fitting boots could carry me.

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I reached the top, and turned left.  My apartment was approximately 30 meters down the hall.  I started running again, but instead of turning into my rooms, I knocked on the door across from mine.  The door opened and I jumped backwards hitting my own door.  I forgot that it was a married couple that lived across from me.

“Go away!” the man shouted as he slammed his door.

Now, I had no idea what to do.  I needed some clothes, or the men would be staring at me.  They would be anyway, but it would only get worse.

I was scared spitless, but I crossed the hall and knocked again.  I’m not sure if I knocked hard enough to get his attention, but he must have been near the door.

“Go away, I said!” came the muffled yell from inside.

He said???  I was almost deaf from his yell!  “Please Mr. Finch.  Is your wife here?”

His voice was a bit softer now.  “No.  With this new affliction, we were terrified of each other.  We couldn’t stand to be in the same room.  Her sister lives in another bay, so she left to stay with her.”

“Did she leave any clothes?” I asked.  “I’m your neighbor from across the hall.  We get along fine in reality, without this newest situation. I was touched when I came upon some women in one of the downstairs passages.”

There was a long pause then finally,  “Go into your apartment and shut the door.  I will set something outside your door and then knock.  Don’t open your door until you hear mine shut.”

“Thank you, Mr. Finch,” I said as I opened my door.  I shut it hard enough for him to hear, then waited.  It was about ten minutes when I heard a soft tap on my door, then his door slammed. I opened my door and found a small pile of folded clothes.  I took them into my bedroom and unfolded them onto my bed.  There were a couple of pairs of panties, two bras,  a couple of dresses and two pairs of shoes.  At least he figured in that I was going to need more than one of everything.  Well, I figured, These will work.

I changed into one change of clothes, and went to my personal comm system.  It was strange that I had changed without a thought about it.  I sat down and my hand froze as I considered what I must now do. I couldn’t make it go to the switch to call John.  Slowly, I put my head down on the table onto the desk in front of me and started to cry.

I’m not sure how long it took, but I went into the bathroom before I made the fateful call.  There was a wallsize screen on one side.  Normally it showed a peaceful scene.  I had always liked scenes of whitecapped peaks.  I grew up in Alaska and I could always see Denali on a clear day. So that’s what it showed.  I told the screen to become a mirror, and froze.  The image I was now seeing took me by surprise.  My face was a mess.  Apparently, the nanites had put makeup on my face, as well as lengthened my hair and changed the color.  I turned on the water and washed off my face, then I looked again.  My eyes were red from crying, but I could see that my genes were the same.  My face looked very much like my mother’s.  Her hair color was the same as mine had been, but she had lightened it a couple of times to the honey blonde I now had.    

Actually, as I looked, I now saw how much my mom and I looked alike, because my face also looked like it had before I changed.  The features were softer and quite nice, but I still liked like me.

Thinking about how much I still looked the same, I could feel revulsion rising in my head.  I stopped thinking about it.  I resolved that when I looked in the mirror, I would not see my male self.  I would see me now, with a resemblance to my mother.  Nothing more.

 All this looking in the mirror was getting me nowhere.  I still needed to call John.  I started out of the bathroom and realized I needed to use it for another purpose.  Grateful that I didn’t have to use the comm yet, I went back.

When I came out, I still wanted to put things off.  I decided I hadn’t eaten yet, so I went into the kitchen alcove and made a burger and fries.  We had not meat on board, but I knew how to make a veggie burger that tasted just like the real thing.  

I got it ready and sat down at my table.  Then I realized I wasn’t hungry.  At all.  I stood up and put the plate into my refrigeration unit.  

This is just putting off the inevitable, I told myself.  I walked over to the computer and before I sat down, I made the call.

It was answered almost immediately, and John shrank back from the camera as soon as he saw it was a woman calling him.

“What do you want?” he asked, keeping his voice under control, but I could see his eyes were filled with fear.

“I need to talk to you,” I answered.

“I’ve never seen you before,” he said.  “I thought I knew everyone….” His voice trailed off and I could see that he had recognized me.

“I ran into a couple of women when I was walking home,” I explained.  “One of them accidently touched me as she turned to run away.”

“Do you want me to come over there and touch you?” he asked.

I was still terrified, but something in my heart stirred as he offered that.  I could see that he didn’t want to, but I knew if I said yes, he would do it.  “No, John.  I don’t.  I doubt either of us could handle that.  I can’t see myself voluntarily letting a man touch me now.”

He slowly nodded.  “What do we do about this?” he asked.

I thought for a moment, then realized something. “In a way, this is a good thing.”  He looked at me like I was crazy, or maybe it was just fear.  “We don’t need three male leaders right now and none female.  Be honest.  The women would get the short end of the stick, wouldn’t they?”

He sat still for a bit, the only thing moving was his face as it displayed a wide variety of emotions, with terror underneath it all.  Finally, he answered.  “I would try my best to not allow that to happen, but yes, I’m afraid you’re right.”

“I can’t see myself coming to the command center anymore.  Again, I doubt any of us could handle that.  I will remain in contact with you on the screen.  I will also contact Perl and let her use my comlink to be patched through to Freeman, so she doesn’t shirk her responsibilities, but doesn’t have to associate with you or the others.

“Also, I think it would be a good idea to have another woman appointed as my equal.  I think we need to maintain an equilibrium so the women do not feel overlooked.”

“They probably will anyway,” he said with a sigh.  It took a moment, then he looked back up at me, obviously afraid he just made me mad.  I have to admit, I felt a bit of anger, but in my heart, I knew he hadn’t meant anything derogatory by it.

“John,” I said, my voice trembling.  “We need to bury the hatchet between us right now.  We are doing exactly what Caesar wanted.”

“I know it,” he said. “I don’t know what I can do about the fear, but I will try to not let it rule me.  Deal?”

I almost laughed.  “Deal, but it’s a good thing we’re not in the same room,” I commented.  “This is where we’d be tempted to shake hands.”

He stared at me for a moment, then burst out laughing.  “Yes, We would.”  A moment later, the smile left his face and he turned to where I knew Marc would be seated.  “How many reports of changes?”  

“Fifty-seven so far, and they keep coming in.”

John’s face went white.  “I need to get off here now.” He looked back at me.  “No offense.”

“None taken.”