Roy And The Road To Renee - Chapter 7
By Pentatonic

Friday, January 9, 2015:

The prior Wednesday my mother told me that she had made an appointment with a counselor for Friday afternoon, and she handed me a note to give the school excusing me from my afternoon classes.

As I left for school on Friday morning, she said, “The appointment is for 1:30, so try to be home by 1:00.”

My friends were interested in what this was all about, but I had absolutely no clue. “My mother made the appointment but didn’t tell me anything,” I explained.

“Look, if when you get wherever you’re going, and you see men in white coats with a straight jacket, run like hell,” Joe suggested.

“Yeah, if they asked us, we’d have told them that you’re nuts, and save all the time and expense,” added Harry. They all got a good laugh out of this.

Joe pulled me aside, and quietly asked, “You don’t think that they’ll try to make you stop wearing skirts and dresses?”

“My dad might like that, but I just don’t know.”

At 1:00 sharp, my dad, my mother and I piled into my dad’s car. But not before my mother asked, “You’re not wearing panties under your clothes, are you?”

I hadn’t thought about doing that, so I assured her that I was not wearing panties. However, upon reflection, that didn’t seem to be such a bad idea. Too bad I hadn’t thought about doing that.

The counselor appeared to share the office space with other counselors or the like. There was a waiting room with cheap looking uncomfortable chairs. A receptionist or secretary sat behind a sliding glass window which looked over the waiting room. My mother announced that we were the Evans’ and had a 1:30 appointment with Dr. Devlin. The secretary, or what ever she was shoved a clipboard with a form thought the open side of the sliding glass window. “Fill this out and return it to me when you’re done.”

My parents and I sat down and my mother started attacking the form. When I suggested that since I was the subject of the counseling that I should fill it out, my mother scowled at me and kept filling in the form.

When she was finished, she returned it without me seeing what it said. About ten minutes later we were escorted to what I presumed was Dr. Devlin’s office/ There was a desk and executive looking chair on one wall, four other chairs, a coffee table and some end tables with lamps. The lighting was rather subdued. Dr. Devlin stood up as we entered and introduced herself. My mother handled the introductions for my family. Dr. Devlin was a rather tall and middle aged woman, not bad looking. She was wearing black court shoes, dark blue hose, and a dark blue dress with a white lab coat over it.

Her white lab coat made me think of Joe’s comments about the men in the white coats and straight jackets. I smiled at the thought. Dr. Devlin saw my smile and returned it. At her invitation we all sat down, with Mom on one side and Dad on the other.

Dr. Devlin turned to me and asked, “Why don’t we start by you telling us why you are here?”

“I have absolutely no idea,” I responded, “my parents made all of the arrangements and told me to come.” The Doctor look surprised with my response, and referred to the form on the clipboard.

“But it says right here . .”

“I never saw what was written on the clipboard,” I quickly interjected.

“Is that true?” Dr. Devlin asked my parents.

“Sort of,” my mother admitted, “we thought that Roy would know.”

“But he says he doesn’t.”

The Doctor turned to me, and referring to the form on the clipboard, she said, “It says that you like to wear female clothes and pretend to be a girl. Is that so?”

“I have dressed like a girl from time to time, but I don’t pretend to be anything other than what I am,” I asserted.

“When did this all start?”

“Last fall. I can give you an exact date if you wish. I, and all of the class, had to write an essay on sexual stereotypes and to imagine what it would be like if we were the opposite sex. My mother and Becky, my girlfriend, decided that I should have the experience first hand, and bought me some girl’s clothes to take a trip to the mall as a girl.”

“And how did that work out?”

“It was a real eye-opener. I learned a lot, and at Becky’s father’s suggestion I started keeping a journal. Becky and I then wrote our essays. We both got A’s.”

“I’d really like to see your journal and essay, if that’s alright with you.” the Doctor requested.

“Okay, sure,”I responded.

“So after your experiment, did you ever wear female clothes?”

“Yeah.”

“When was the last time you did?”

“Monday.”

“Like four days ago?” With this revelation my parents had strange looks on their faces. “What was the occasion?”

“Well, my friend Joe had signed up for ballroom dancing classes and his girlfriend couldn’t make the first session, so I went as her substitute. I went to my girlfriend’s house and got dressed there.”

“That may explain the surprised looks on you parents’ faces.,” the Doctor said.

“Yeah, I didn’t want them to know. I know that my dad doesn’t like me to dress as a girl.”

“Okay, the dance class. How did that go?”

“It was alright. I’m a pretty good dancer, and my sister helped me learn the girl’s steps.”

“So Becky and your sister know. How about Joe and your other friends?”

“They all know. I had to read my essay in class.” I volunteered.

“And they don’t have a problem with your cross dressing?”

“Since all of them are still my friends, I would say that it’s okay with them,” I said.

“Any times between last fall and this last Monday?”

“Yes,” I answered, and I related the stories of Halloween and my seasonal job as a girl. I had noted that the Doctor was frantically scribbling notes as I talked. “Everything I told you, and more, are in my journal, which I have kept up to date. I can let you see it, so you don’t have to write so much.”

“Thanks, that’s a great idea,” the Doctor said with a smile.

“Do you like wearing girl’s clothes?” the Doctor asked, changing the topic of our discussion.

“I do. It can be fun.” I answered, “at least most of the time.”

“Any problems?”

“One comes to mind,” and I related the events that happened at the New Year’s Day dinner, “The interesting part was that when this happened, I was wearing a coat and a tie. I was all ‘Roy’ at that time.”

“Did what happened bother you?”

“A lot.”

“Do you ever think that you really are a girl?”

“I don’t know. I like to be Roy, but I also like to be a girl some times. Most of the time I feel like a girl when I’m dressed as a girl, but otherwise, not. I feel like I have a Roy side and a Renee side. My Renee side is getting stronger.”

After some more discussions, the Doctor looked at her watch. “Well, our time is about up. How do you feel about coming back a week from today? You can bring your journal.”

She then turned to my parents. “I’d like Roy to have a complete physical and some blood tests. Let me write out what I want, and you can take it to Roy’s physician.”

After a quiet ride home, I went up to my room to be alone. However, I was home for about a half hour when my sister knocked on my door, and I let her in.

“So, sis, how did it go?” she asked.

“I’m not sure, but the Doctor seemed to be interested in my story. I’m going to give her a copy of my journal at the next session.”

“How did Mom and Dad take it?” she asked

“I don’t think they got what they wanted,” I answered.

“And that was what?”

“I think they wanted the counselor to make me stop dressing.”

“So, you’re not going to get rid of all of your skirts, tops and dresses?”

“At least for now,” I answered.

“So you’re not going to give them all to me?”

“We can share.” I said, and we gave each other hugs.

Friday, January 16, 2015:

I brought a copy of my journal to the next counseling session. Dr. Devlin was impressed. “Not only do you say what happened, but you also record your feelings. I’m looking forward to reading it.”

The discussions were a lot like the previous session and I brought up Renee. When the Doctor got into questions about sexual activities, she noted that both my parents and I were uncomfortable.

She then surprised me. “I’d like to have Renee at the next session, and just Renee.” She turned to my parents and addressed them. “Mr. and Mrs. Evans, I think it would be better if you did not attend the next session because otherwise it might make Roy uncomfortable.”

It was obvious that my parents were not happy with this, but at last they agreed.

When I got home, my sister was overjoyed with this news. “You have to pick out an outfit that is just right for the occasion. Are you going to let me help you?”

“Of course,” I said, “isn’t that what sisters are for?”

Friday, January 23, 2015:

I arose earlier than usual, and took a shower after first applying hair remover. I heard the bathroom door open and peeked around the shower curtain. It was Amy. “Isn’t this a little early for you?” I asked.

“Yeah, but I have to help my sister get dressed for the big day,” she answered. “I’ll see you in your room,” she added and left the bathroom.

When I walked into my room she was laying out lingerie and stockings for me. “You won’t have a lot of time to get dressed before the counseling session, so it may be a good idea to wear your Renee underclothes now, and cover them with some jeans and a baggy sweatshirt for school.”

I nodded my approval, and started with my nylons. While doing this the towel fell off. I caught my sister staring at my crotch, and I frowned at her. “Girls don’t mind seeing each other naked or partially dressed,” she said as if this explained everything. “Hasn’t Becky seen you naked?”

“No.”

“Too bad,” she replied.

Since I would need more time today, I decided to cut my last class. I could tell the teacher that my doctor’s appointment had been moved up, which I did.

Before school, Amy and I had decided that I should wear a gray A-line skirt. Because it was unlined, I would need a slip. We had chosen a long sleeved ivory blouse and a gray sweater. I knew that I was cutting it close, because of my hair, which I would put in a french twist and my makeup. I made it to my counselor’s office with a few minutes to spare.

I walked up to the sliding glass window, and told the secretary or receptionist, or whatever she was, that I had a 1:30 appointment with Dr. Devlin. She just looked at me with a vacant stare and consulted her appointment list. “You’re not on the list,” she said.

“Name’s Evans,” I said.

“There’s no girl named Evans on the list,” she challenged.

“I’m Roy Evans,” I explained. “Tell Dr. Devlin that I’m here.”

Still staring, she reluctantly got off of her chair, presumable to report that a girl named Roy was out front. It apparently worked because a minute later she opened the door and escorted me to Dr. Devlin’s office.

“Wow,” Dr. Devlin exclaimed when I entered her office. “You are beautiful. Have a seat.”

I smoothed my skirt under me and gracefully lowered myself to a chair and demurely crossed my ankles, keeping my knees together.

Dr. Devlin silently looked at me, and then asked, “Roy, if that really you?” I smiled. “I don’t see much of Roy here,” she added.

“I’ll take that as a compliment,” I responded.

“How do you do it?”

“Well, first of all there’s this uncomfortable corset.”

“Do you always wear a corset?”

“Only when I’m Renee.”

“Why do you wear it?”

“For my figure, and if I don’t my clothes won’t fit right. However, I’m also trying to lose some weight.”

“And?” she asked, looking for more.

“A lot of practice and a job at a women’s clothing store with a 60 percent discount. I’ve also had help. At first from my mother and Becky, and later from my sister and Becky.” I commented.

“As I’ve read in your journal. By the way your journal is very detailed and comprehensive, however, there is very little of any sexual activity noted in it. How come?”

“There hasn’t been any,” I said.

“Really?, Many girls your age have already engaged in sexual intercourse,” she commented, “And are you saying you haven’t?”

“I can’t very well have sexual intercourse as a girl, now can I?” I responded.

“Well, now that you mention it, you can’t” she said with a smile, “It’s just seeing you dressed as you are, it’s hard to imagine you as anything other than as an attractive girl.”

“Thank you, I try to look good,” I said.

“And you succeed. But a lot of boys your age have had sexual intercourse.” She noted.

“Or at least they claim to, A lot of them lie.”

“But you haven’t”

“No.”

“Why not?”

“I’m only sixteen. There’s this rumor going around that a sixteen year old guy and his sixteen year old girlfriend were caught doing it in the back seat of his car in a parking lot and that he may end up as a registered sex offender for the rest of his life. Scary, if it’s true, so I am dutifully scared of that and the further problem of the girl getting pregnant.” I explained.

“But how about just ‘fooling around’ a bit?” she suggested.

“It’s hard to stop once you begin to ‘fool around’ as you call it.” I answered.

“Is that from personal knowledge?” she asked.

“Sort of,” I answered, “at least it seems so with Becky. And then there’s Joe.”

“Joe?” she questioned with a bit of astonishment, “tell me about that.”

“Well” I started, “Joe likes it when I’m dressed as Renee. He likes to touch me. He convinced me to go on a date with him, which probably was a mistake, and at the movie he kept putting his hand up my skirt and rubbing my thigh. He even took my hand and put it on his thigh. If I hadn’t stopped him, I don’t know what would have happened if and when he got to my panties.”

“So why did you stop him?”

“Oh, come on!” I blurted out, “both of us are guys.”

“But when this happened, you were Renee, right?”

“Yean, but as I said, it probably was a mistake to do so on my part. He might have wanted me to have oral sex with him, and I wasn’t going to find out.”

“Do you think he’s a homosexual?”

“I don’t know,” I answered, “but I heard that his girl friend, Sue, wasn’t so reluctant.”

“Do you think that you might be homosexual?” she asked.

I thought for a moment, and then said, “I don’t think so, because I am really attracted to girls, especially Becky. However, when on the date with Joe, I wondered what it would be like to give him oral sex. Maybe I’m bi-sexual.”

“Maybe, and maybe you really want to be a girl.” she commented.

“I’m really messed up, aren’t I?” I questioned.

“No more than most teenagers,” she reassured me, “but your lack of sexual experience makes it difficult to come to any conclusions.”

“So you think I should go further in my relationship with Becky, and maybe with Joe?” I asked with some astonishment.

She sat up straighter, and pronounced, “As a mental healthcare professional I can’t recommend it.” She seemed to relax a bit and then said, “But. . .”

I took her meaning. “I understand,” I said.

“Good,” she said.

When the session was over I text massaged Becky and asked if she wanted a ride home from school. I signed it ‘Renee.’ She massaged back and said “Yes ;-)” I timed it so that I pulled into the parking lot just as Becky came out of the door. I wanted as few people to see me dressed as Renee as possible, since a lot of people also knew Roy’s car.

When she entered my car and saw me, she said, “Oh, la, la,” and leaned over the center console and kissed me. I pulled out of the parking lot but stopped a block away, and flipped down the visors to expose the vanity mirrors. “Lipstick,” was all I needed to say.

Naturally, I had to give a full report on the counseling session. “How did she like Renee?” Becky asked.

“She said I wouldn’t make first cut in an amateur drag queen competition,” I said, trying unsuccessfully to keep a straight face.

“She did not!” exclaimed Becky.

“She was really impressed,” I then answered, “she thought I looked good.”

“As you do.”

My mother had a part time job doing the books and payroll for a dental practice. Her hours were flexible, and some of the work she did could be done at home, but on this day she was working on the 2014 profit and loss statement and payroll tax reporting, so she didn’t expect to be done until at least 5:30. Since she wouldn’t have time to prepare supper, she and my dad were going out to dinner directly from her work. “Maybe you and Becky can do some studying and order a pizza for dinner,” she had told me when I dropped her off at the office that morning. She even gave me some money. As a result, Becky and I had the house to ourselves until at least 7:00, with the exception of my sister.

“Maybe Becky and I’ll catch a movie and stop for pizza afterwards,” I told my mother. That was okay with her.

My sister Amy had ridden home from school with her current boyfriend and had arrived at the house shortly after Becky and I did. “Hey, sis,” she said to me. “Got a minute? I need to talk with you,” Amy’s use of the word ‘sis’ caused momentary confusion to Becky until she remembered what had happened on New Year’s day.

Amy’s current Beau was a guy named Andy. “I don’t think that I want Andy to see Renee. Not only because he may not understand, but furthermore he might like you more than me,” she said with a smile.

“Okay, so how do you want to plan this?” I said, “Mom gave me money for a pizza, and Becky and I are going to study together until then. We’ll be in my room.”

“If you don’t mind. I’d like to invite Andy over for pizza, and after that we’re going out to see a movie,” Amy said. “ I’d like to be out of here before the parents come home.”

“And you’d like some private time together with Andy, too,” I commented,

“Yeah, that too,” she said.

“Okay, sounds like a plan. You leave Becky and me alone for our studying, and we’ll give you time with Andy.”

Amy stood for a minute looking at me. Finally she said, “You really look pretty. That’s a nice skirt you have on. If you weren’t wearing it I’d like to borrow it for my date.”

In response, I reached behind me and unzipped my skirt. I picked it up from where it had fallen in the floor and handed it to Amy. “Be my guest,” I said to her. “Remember, it’s unlined, so you’ll need a slip.” I took off my half slip and handed it to her. With that, Becky and I picked up our books and headed to my room.

Friday, January 30, 2015:

After a hurried session of getting ready, I attended this counseling session as Renee, which might have had something to do with what Dr. Devlin suggested. “I think that we should discuss your cross-dressing,” she said.

“Okay,” I said.

“You’ve done a lot of it since the fall. Do you like it?”

“Remember, most of the time I dressed in female clothes I was working in the store and I kind of had to dress as I did,” I observed.

“You make it seem that you found it unpleasant,” she said, “but I get this impression that you actually liked it. So, tell me, do you like wearing female clothes?”

“Yes,” I confessed.

“Do you feel like a girl when you do?”

“Sort of.”

“When you wear female clothes, do you feel an attraction to boys?”

“Well, maybe,” I answered.

“More than when you are dressed as Roy?”

“I guess so,” I said.

“Have you ever felt an attraction to boys when dressed as Roy?”

“Sometimes when I’m feeling girly, otherwise not.”

“If you could, without any adverse consequences, would you wear female clothes all the time?”

“Probably not,” I answered.

“Why not?”

“There are just some times when it’s more fun being a boy.”

The rest of the session followed the same lines. At the end of the session I suggested that I would like to see if my parents would allow me to be Renee whenever I liked. Dr. Devlin suggested that we could do that and that I should invite my parents to the next session.

As I had done the week before, I picked Becky up from school after my counseling session.

My mother would not be home that afternoon for the same reasons as before. It being the end of January, there were a plethora of year end tax returns to be filed, both state and federal, for the dental practice. This in addition to normal payroll, profit and loss statements, partners’ distribution of profits and allocation of operating expenses. This meant that she was working all day and my father was picking her up from work and taking her out to dinner. My parents were not expected to be home until after 7:00. She left some money for Amy and I to order a pizza or other take-out food.

“We both have to pick up our W-2 forms, so why don’t we head off to the mall? We can also look at clothes,” I said to Becky when we were in the car.

“And check out the boys,” Amy replied.

“Maybe for you,” I said, “but remember that you’re my girlfriend, and I’m not in the market for a boyfriend, no matter how I’m dressed.”

“With the way you’re dressed, you’ll have to fight them off,” Becky added, with a chuckle, and she reached over and slid her hand up my skirt. I reminded her that I had to pay attention to my driving, and she reluctantly removed her hand,

When we arrived at the mall, I called Amy and told her that I would not be home until 5:00. “Andy will be with me,” Amy warned, “so make sure that you and Becky don’t arrive any earlier.”

When Becky and I arrived at the tall girls store, Ms. Shay mentioned that she could use my help a few days before Valentine’s Day, and we worked out a schedule.

Becky and I arrived at my house at about 5:30, just in time to see Andy’s car back out of the driveway.

Friday, February 6, 2015:

When my parents and I, dressed as Roy, arrived for the counseling session, Dr. Devlin said, “Roy wants us to explore some issues. Roy, why don’t you start out the discussion.

I took a deep breath. “I know that you don’t like it when I’m dressed as Renee, but I’d like it if I could dress as Renee at home or whenever I want to.” My statement was greeted with silence from my parents.

Dr. Devlin finally broke the silence. “How do you feel about that?” she asked my parents.

“This Renee business has gone on much further than it should have,” my father answered, “I don’t like it and I surely don’t want to condone it.”

“It’s already caused problems with my family,” my mother interjected, and she related the disaster at the New Year’s dinner.

“How does your daughter feel about this?” Dr. Devlin asked my parents.

“You’d have to ask her,” my mother commented.

“I can answer that,” I said, “we’ve become more like sisters. She likes borrowing my clothes.”

“I’ve noticed that Amy has been dressing better,” my mother said, “now I know why.”

There was a pause in the conversation before I said, “I’m going to be working at the tall girl’s store for a few shifts before Valentine’s Day.”

“I guess that’s okay,” my father conceded, “at least he’ll be earning money.”

“Could we set some limits that everyone can agree on?” suggested Dr. Devlin.

I was making progress. I thought, and the rest of the session involved negotiations of when and where I could be Renee.

My father concluded the session by saying, “No dressing like a street walker, His mother or I have to approve of his clothes.”