And we learn even the 'literal genie' can't resist a peek.

Alec McFarland marched along the beach, playing the pipes
in full regalia. Actually he hadn't planned on practicing
out here in the middle of nowhere but his flatmates had
suggested he get some fresh air. Actually they had bodily
tossed him from the flat muttering dire threats about where
his pipes might end up if he didn't practice elsewhere. So
Alec marched along the shore thinking about Timothy
O'Shea.

Now Alec loved women; he loved the clothes they wore, the
way they smelled and the way they looked. But he loved
Timmy more and his greatest wish in life was to find his
way to Timmy's heart. But alas, Timmy only had eyes for the
lassies and this painful thought caused Alec to produce
the most awful wailing note from his pipes. So painful was
that note that fish popped out of the water and lay dead on
the surface and right in front of him an old bottle
fractured into thousands of pieces, sending the stopper
shooting ten feet into the air.

Then, before Alec's astonished eyes, appeared a genie with
hair standing straight out and holding her fingers in her
ears for dear life. The genie looked about and cautiously
removed her fingers from her ears, but remained poised to
instantly replace them if necessary. She regarded Alec
with a jaundiced eye.

"Was it you produced that awful caterwauling?" she asked.

"Aye, miss. I'm sorry if I disturbed you, " the apologetic
Alec replied. "The pipes got away from me."

"You humans certainly find unique ways to free me from the
bottle. Can't any of you just pull out the stopper like it
was intended? No matter. You are entitled to one wish for
freeing me so get on with it, I have a major house repair
to begin."

Alec thought, "Here's my golden opportunity" and said, "I
wish I were a lassie with long golden blond hair and that I
could love Timmy forever."

"So it is spoken…" The Genie paused while Alec stood there
frozen. She lifted up the front of his kilt. "Aha! Just as
I suspected." she said, then completed the phrase, "So
shall it be done!"

--------------------------------Later-----------------------------------------

"Timmy, time for dinner," called out his mom.

Timmy yelled for Lassie, "C'mon girl time to eat."

Alec shook his coat and scampered after Timmy.

"Cut, " yelled the director and then turned on the dog's
trainer. "I know we're using a male dog because they're
easier to train but could you please stop Lassie from
trying to hump Timmy's leg every time they're alone!"