Without a trace part 5: More Questions
A Story by Allie Elle
As they pulled away from the kerb JR relaxed and started to think, he wondered why they were now targeting a new profile of victims unless the kidnappers were running out of victims. He hid his intellect from people including his family and now he started to turn his mind to the problem. Slowly he turned over what he knew or had found out from the files he had stolen a look at. He had a talent of being able to take the traces of an idea and slowly work them together into what could be viewed as evidence. Slowly they weaved through the tail end of the rush hour traffic and they sat in silence for a while, JR closed his eyes to aide his recall of the files and he continued to think.
They reached the staff parking lot of the hospital and pulled into the space reserved for his mother as the chief of psychiatry. It was a short walk to the administration entrance of the hospital and mother found out where the young man from this morning had been admitted. They walked through JR trying to remember the twists and turns and came to a private room and they saw a police guard stood by the door. Mrs Richards nodded to the police officer and showed her identity and he smiled, then he turned to JR and looked at him.
turned to JR and looked at him.
“Are you an intern Miss?” He asked.
“Officer this is my son JR and he knows the victim.” JR’s mother replied. The officer looked shocked and backed up a bit and opened the door his face a beet red.
JR smiled and nodded to the officer to show he held no malice to him for the mistake. His mother noticed that JR did not correct the officer on the mistake of his gender and she noted it as well. They entered the room and it was darkened and there was a nurse sat in a chair in the corner, Mrs Richards held a whispered conference and she turned to JR her face drawn in concern.
“JR there’s been a problem and maybe you can help.”
“Sure Mom you know I will help if I can” JR looked over at the small body in the hospital bed and saw that they were restrained.
“Mom did Bill try to suicide?” JR asked.
“Yes JR and well he hasn’t said why, we are getting very worried about what's going on in his head and he won’t tell us.” JR pulled up a chair and sat down next to the bed and reached out a gentle hand and reached for Bill’s forehead.
At his touch Bill moved his head away from the touch and turned towards the window keeping his eyes closed. A small sob quietly shook the body in the bed and JR looked at his Mom and the nurse and sat quietly just letting his presence felt. Slowly Bill started to relax and turned his head so he faced JR, as he slowly opened his eyes a gentle smile spread across his face.
“Hey Bud they get you too?” Bill asked.
“No Bill you’re in hospital we managed to stop them taking you, but what did you do to cause them to tie you down?”
“Well I thought they had got me and there was no way I was going to be a girl.”
The nurse looked up at that comment and looked puzzled and eased herself from the chair. She walked over to JR’s mom and whispered in her ear and she nodded at the reply. The two women left the room and allowed JR to talk to bill alone as the two of them shared the silence for a few minutes bill cleared his throat and looked away for a few seconds.
“You know J if I looked, like you I wouldn’t worry about looking like a girl.” Bill Muttered
“Lay off Bill people will think you’re a faggot if you carry on like that.” They both laughed at that and slowly JR pumped him for information slowly dragging out what he was after.
A short while later JR was making notes on the back of a small box and his mom walked back in and handed him a small note pad. He stopped scribbling and thanked her then went back to writing and he put all he had learned from Bill into order and he stopped. His mother was looking at Bill and she moved her head to indicate that JR should leave and he nodded. With a smile he left the hospital and sat in the corridor and went over the notes he had. As he poured over the files and created the links in his mind and he could almost seemed to see the lines between the paragraphs he had written. His mind working overtime as everything slipped in and out of place all the data flowing he almost was like a computer as he went over the notes. He used his memory to overview the files and bring everything into focus as he worked.
Half an hour passed and his mother was still in the room and he was starting to get bored sitting there. There was only so much he could do with the data and he needed more, he wished he was brave enough to hack the police department’s computer to get more information. He felt that there were too many holes in what he knew and he needed to know more. He hated operating in the dark and this was one of those times, he definitely needed more information and the references to “the Hall” puzzled him. He wondered why all the victims of these kidnappers ended there instead of going back to their families. He wasn’t a conspiracy theorist but he smelled something involving the government there.
An hour passed and finally his mother came out of Bill’s room, her face was drawn and she turned to the officer on duty and motioned for him to follow her down the corridor. JR was desperate to follow but he knew that he would be chewed out big time over this if he did. He left them to their conversation and stood up tucking
away the notebook and waiting staring out of the window. Just then Josie and her partner walked down the corridor they both smiled and waved at JR and then joined his mother. As the four of them talked JR really wanted to get moving and desperately wished he could openly help on the case. As he stood there waiting he turned back to the four of them just as his mother shouted.
“No Way I am not putting him in harm’s way!” she bellowed and stormed down the corridor.
“Wouldn’t it be better if we let him decide?” Josie shouted after her.
Way I am not putting him in harm’s way!” she bellowed and stormed down the corridor.
JR knew that they were talking about him and he walked up to the three that were left. He waited pushing his hands into the small pockets on the combat jeans he had chosen to wear. Josie seemed to finally notice him and turned to face him with a worried smile.
“JR mom’s a bit pissed because we want to ask you to do something for us,” Her face was white as she went on, “We want you to become a target for these kidnappers and well mom is not willing to risk you.”
“Sis I am 18 and I can make my own choices in life, mom is a little shocked over this morning it was a bit of a surprise to her,” He stopped for breath,” I want to do this I want these people caught too and well might mean I make the department one day.”
After he said his piece he noticed his mother stood next to him her face pale and drawn and a shadow across her eyes. She leaned forward and hugged him tight to her and almost squeezed the air out of him. The uniformed officer looked shocked at what JR had said; he also smiled and nodded his acceptance of this young person’s bravery. The officer was also a little worried why they would use a teenage boy to help but he guessed the two detectives knew better.
Continued in chapter 6 baiting the trap.
Comments
Very interesting
Very difficult to read, though, with little punctuation. It really needs a good editor to go through this; it would leap several hundred percent in readability with improved punctuation and formatting.
Looking forward to developments, though.
Susie
An interesting story…
An interesting story…but VERY difficult to read, Allie. You really need someone to edit these stories for you, because as they are, virtually lacking punctuation, I find I have to read each sentence several times to try to understand the message you are trying to put across. As a small example, you have written:
“No Way I am not putting him in harm’s way!â€
The way you have written it it could mean that you ARE putting him in harm's way because you have a double negative; or the way I think you meant it that you are NOT putting him in harms way. You should have punctuated it so the two parts of the sentence can be distinguished. Like this:
“No Way! I am not putting him in harm’s way.â€
Try to avoid exclamation marks (!) (also known as screamers) except where you think they are absolutely essential.
Please do not take this as meant unkindly, Allie, it is intended to be of help.
Best wishes,
N.S
Without a trace
I like this story it is very thoughtfull looking forward too how it progresses:)
Something is changed??
Eemm???? Who is Josie? I thought the name for the sister before was Joanie.
whoops
whoops typo itus strikes as i write it is Joanie
happens to the best of us i suppose
to hug is to be and to be is to be hugged
view the world through the eyes of a child and relearn the wonder and love
Allie elle loved and cared for and resident of the kids camp full time
to hug is to be and to be is to be hugged
view the world through the eyes of a child and relearn the wonder and love
Allie elle loved and cared for and resident of the kids camp full time
Without a Trace - Part 5
Hopefully, the bad guys will screw up so that they can be caught.
May Your Light Forever Shine
May Your Light Forever Shine