The days were getting shorter. Summer had just flown by. Patrick was beginning to feel a quite a panic setting in. He had promised to find a job by the end of summer, but his heart just wasn’t in it. Here it was already the second week of September. His father was getting impatient. Patrick would rather have gone to school. He had the grades for it. But his father had not supported his choice of schools. Linfield’s College of Nursing at Good Samaritan Hospital was accepting men in the nursing program. In two years he could be an LPN if he stuck it out four, he could graduate an RN. But his Dad said “I’m not paying anybody to turn my son in to a pantywaist male nurse!”

He took his swim suit and clothes with him as he quickly rushed up stairs. He wanted to see himself. The image in the mirror was exciting. His hair was a little short but if he brushed it forward over his forehead, it looked pretty good. He knew, when he saw himself in the mirror, he would do this again. He twirled around and felt the fabric caress his legs and watched the way it moved when he walked. A whole new vista opened up for him. He would be back!

If only, he could find a job where he could dress like this. He looked particularly good this time. Both Mom and Dad were at work today. Knowing he would be alone in the morning, he had started preparing last night. He had taken a long hot bath, using the bubble bath he gotten at Christmas time. His father could not know he used bubble bath. Last night had been his bowling night, so he would never know. Dad was very predictable on his bowling night. Out of the house at 6:30, back no earlier than 10:30. Mom on the other hand was fully aware of all that the bubble bath meant. She had even seen him leaving the bathroom and knew at a glance what was in store for today.

The image that greeted him in the mirror was perfection. It was everything he had hoped for. His skin tone was soft and natural looking; his lips full and his cheeks had just a touch of color. His lashes were dark and long; his hair was long, soft and curly. It was full of body, just as he had hoped it would be.

How old had he been when they rented “Some Like It Hot” on video? Seven? No, he was eight. He remembered because it was just the week before the Fourth of July. There had been fire crackers going off during the movie and his father was telling him when he was eight they had real fire crackers. Not just those “Lady Fingers” they can get from Montana these days.

Anyway, it was the Fourth of July that year when he found himself alone in the basement. The laundry was on the counter ready to go into the washing machine, except Mom had taken the day off for the holiday. He had been impressed by how much Jack Lemon and Tony Curtis had looked like girls and he thought at the time it would be fun to try that too. He knew that he couldn’t just ask permission to try it. His Dad always talked badly about “sissies” and “pantywaists” and had said that’s what they looked like. It, he said, was what made the movie so funny. Two men running around like a couple of pantywaists.

He turned around and took the hand mirror and checked all sides. He never tired of this game. The only thing he liked more than a mirror was a photograph. He had very few of those. His sister had taken a few when he was younger. But they always had trouble getting them developed because she never took a whole roll and of course Dad could never see them.

There he was alone with the wash. The whole family was next door, where Dad and the neighbor were trying to outdo each other as barbecue king. He had come over to get his swim suit out of the laundry and put it on, so he could go into the wading pool they got yesterday. He had decided to change right there in the basement and was naked when the thought struck him. ‘He could put on his sister’s clothes and no one would know.’ After all, they were going right into the washing machine tomorrow. No need to worry about getting them dirty. The white clothes (panties and slips) were in one pile, and coloreds (dresses) were in another. So he did it. Panties, slip and dress. He liked it, right from the time he first felt the nylon panties sliding over his legs.

The dress he had chosen was still pretty summery. He really liked summer dresses best. Maybe it was because it was a summer dress that had been his first experience. If it hadn’t have been for the light, loose dress he had first tried on, he may not have liked this nearly as much. The way it floated around his legs had captivated him. Had set his imagination soaring.

That was just the beginning all right. It didn’t take long until he managed another shot at the laundry. Then he did it again. Only this time, he got into her clean clothes. It was heaven. They were so much nicer, when they were clean. She had potpourri in her lingerie drawer. The scent was intoxicating.

Today, he was going to spend his birthday money from Grandma. He knew a place that had very reasonably priced clothes where they seemed to have no trouble with him trying them on before he bought. He had been there many times. He was sure that at least some of the sales ladies knew he wasn’t really a woman, but they always treated him as if he were. (He was sure at least one knew because he had even gone in dressed as a man and the sales clerk spotted him as he found a mirror to hold up a dress to himself. She asked him if he would like to try it on.) Wouldn’t Grandma have a cow if she knew her money was buying him a dress or two?

It was a short drive to the strip mall where his favorite dress shop was. He had all day. Maybe he would take in a movie while he was out. It would be a shame to waste such a perfectly good day. Yeah, a movie.

He had all day. He was supposed to be going to Mike's house as soon as he had cleaned his room. But as usual, he had to take a detour through his sister’s closet. He’d just spend an hour or two in her clothes. Not knowing how long he had, he usually wanted to be near his room. If push came to shove, he could take her clothes off in there and worry about how to get them back later. He always thought, as a last resort, he could just put them in the laundry. It had never come to that. This time however, since he had all that time, he ventured downstairs. Usually confined to the upstairs, this was a treat.

As he came into the living room, he noticed that a movie he had wanted to see had just started on television. So he sat down and watched it, after all, he had all day. No one was supposed to be home for hours. He would just enjoy a movie wearing a dress. Then he would go to Mike’s.

When the station break came on, he got up and went into the kitchen. As he looked in the fridge, he heard the back door open. He stood up and looked. Mom was standing there looking at him. She had come home early.

“Patrick? Is that you? What are you doing dressed like that? You were supposed to clean your room and go straight to Mike’s.”

“Mike couldn’t have company until he got through with his chores. So, I decided to play dress up for a while.”

“Well, you’d better not let your father catch you dressed like that...”

He arrived about 11:00. He would have better than two hours before he would have to worry about what movie he would see. The afternoon shows didn’t start until sometime after 1:00. He picked out six possible dresses. In two shifts they all went into the dressing room. As he tried on each one, he came out and looked at himself in the three way mirror. The saleslady was very helpful. She came to check on him and got him a larger size two times. Finally he chose two dresses that fit well within his budget. He even got a new purse to go with each of them.

As he was leaving the shop, he nearly panicked. He had no more than paid for his purchases when the shop door opened and the neighbor lady walked in. He froze. She turned to the left almost immediately on entering. While she was occupied, looking at some sweaters he quickly slipped out. It was his greatest fear, getting caught.

He was very careful to make sure Dad never caught him. Sometimes it was pure luck. Once it had been very close. Mom, bless her heart, had stalled Dad from coming upstairs to give him time to slip into his room. Mom had come in later and taken the clothes to put them back in his sister’s room. However; another time, he did get over confident again. He went all the way to the basement where he could slip out the basement door on the downhill side of the house. There he could take a few steps out into the yard before he could be seen by any of the neighbors. It was a dumb thing to do, but he was all dressed up and had no place to go. As he came into the kitchen from the basement, his sister walked in from the living room. ‘Where had she come from?’

“What are you doing in my clothes? I’m going to tell Mom.”

“So! Go ahead I don’t care.”

“You go up and get out of my clothes right now. I didn’t say you could wear them. You’ll be sorry when Mom finds out.”

“No. I won’t,” he said strutting up the stairs, confident that Mom already knew.

The next morning Mom came to his room before he got out of bed. She sat down on the edge of his bed and looked at him sorrowfully.

“Patrick,” she began. “I have bad news for you. Your sister is very upset that you would get into her things without permission. She insists that you never do it again. OK? I convinced her that I could handle this and that she need not involve your father. You must to do as I say. I don’t know just how your father would react if she were to tell him.

He drove to the theater and locked his purchases in the trunk. “Tootsie” was playing. What a perfect movie to see today. Dustin Hoffman was a superb actor. Two and one half hours of convincing cross-dressing. He dreamed of being able to do what he did. Dress as a woman and go to work every day.

On the way out of the theater it happened again. As he rounded the corner to go to his car, he almost ran head on into that same neighbor lady. Didn’t she have anything better to do on a weekday than wonder around the mall? Fortunately, she was looking in her purse and Patrick side stepped in time to miss her. He just kept walking at brisk pace. That had been close. A half step closer and there would have been physical contact. He looked good, but he was sure that he could never stand up to a face to face encounter with someone who knew him. He had almost been caught for a second time.

He was really trying to be careful. Mom caught him once and then his sister caught him. Mom hadn’t been mad at all, just shocked the first time he was caught. He was very sure that his Dad would never catch him; it was his sister and his mother. He stayed close to his room or his sister’s room to be sure that in the event of miss timing, he could find refuge.

Everything went well until he tried on one of her new dresses. It had a zipper up the back. When he went to take it off, the zipper stuck right between his shoulder blades. He couldn’t get a good enough grip on it to make it go up or down. He was trapped in the dress. He couldn’t just tear the dress, it was new. His sister would know for sure he had been messing with it. He paced the hall upstairs, fruitlessly pulling at the zipper. In his frantic efforts, he lost all track of time. He knew Mom would be home soon and if he didn’t get out of it by then, he would half to own up to another episode if dressing in his sisters’ clothes. It must have been half an hour later when the front door opened. He was no closer to getting free than he had been in the beginning.

“Patrick,” His mother’s voice rang out. “I need some help carrying things to the basement.”

He stopped pacing and stood quietly.

She called again. This time from the bottom of the stairs. “Patrick, are you up there?”

“Yes,” he answered weakly.

“Well come down. I have everything in from the car, but I need your help to carry it to the basement.”

Slowly he descended the stairs. He could hear his mother in the kitchen. He knew that the “things” in question were in the kitchen. He crossed the living room and stood silently in the kitchen door. Shortly, Mom turned and saw him there.

“Patrick. Why are you wearing your sister's dress?”

“The zipper’s stuck. I can’t get it off.”

“Let me see.”

He turned around and she came over and examined the zipper.

“It’s really stuck. Come up to my sewing room.”

In her sewing room she got out a tool and hooked it in the zipper. Holding the waist of the dress, she pulled gently up on the zipper. With a sudden rush, it zipped up. Then she pulled it down carefully.

“Take that off and let me see if you’ve damaged the fabric.”

He stood in the slip and stockings watching his mother looking at the zipper. She sat down at the sewing machine.

“You’re lucky. Just a few stitches are pulled. I can sew it on my machine and no one will ever know.” She looked at him and shook her head. “Now get out of those things while I fix this.”

He went to his sister’s room and stripped, putting everything back as he found it. He ducked across the hall nude and dressed in his own clothes before going downstairs. As he went past the sewing room door. Mom appeared, holding out the dress.

“Put this back just like you found it. Then I want to see you down stairs.”

When he came down, she was sitting on the couch. She didn’t seem mad or anything, but she obviously wasn’t happy.

“Patrick, you know, if you keep this up, you’ll be caught by your father sooner or later.”

“I can be sure that Dad will never find out. I only do it when he’s at work or out of town.”

“Well then your sister could catch you as easily as I did. What if I had been late coming home and she had been early? You know she’ll be home in less than an hour. If it had been her that had caught you, I’m sure that she would have gone to your Dad. After all you just about ruined her new dress. I don’t think she would have believed me if I told her I could handle it. That’s what I said last time.”

“It’s just that there is so little to do around here. Julie never includes me in anything she does. What’s more, it really doesn’t hurt anything. I just borrow her clothes. I never get them dirty or anything. Please don’t make me stop. It’s the only fun thing to do when I’m alone. I’ll be careful and I won’t wear any of her new things anymore. I’ll just wear her old clothes. I promise.”

“I know that there aren’t any boys your age in the neighborhood and you don’t have much to do. But your sister feels like you are invading her privacy and I agree. Those are her clothes. She’ll still go to your father unless you stop. You have to promise.”

“Mom, I’ve tried to stop. But when I’m here alone, I get bored and it’s all there is that’s interesting. I, I can’t promise.”

“Even if you confine yourself to her old clothes... Wait. Maybe there is something we can do. Let’s get that stuff to the basement.”

He took her new ironing board and iron down while she carried the portable clothes rack. Once everything was put away, she went to the storage room and pulled some boxes off the shelf. There was a small wardrobe stored in there. It was left over from their old house. His sister’s room had been short on closet space so they bought it to put in her room. It was unused now. This house had big closets.

Mom opened several boxes pulling out the drawers that ran down one side of the wardrobe; she started filling them with his sister’s castoff under things. Panties in one drawer, socks in another. Her old training bras went with the socks and some slips and sweaters found their way to the last drawer. Behind the double doors, she put dresses, skirts, blouses, shorts and pants. At last, she turned to Patrick.

“Here,” she said, indicating the wardrobe, “is your girl’s wardrobe. Everything you could want is here. If you don’t go too far from the basement and always remember to change down here, you should be able to avoid getting caught.”

“Are there any shoes in those boxes?”

“No, but we are getting your sister some new shoes tomorrow. I’ll see that a couple of pair her old ones are in the bottom of the closet tomorrow evening.

“Now, can you promise to stay out of your sisters’ things?”

He stopped by the Post Office to check his PO Box. He thought sure the catalogs he had ordered should be there by now. Then, it was such a nice day, he stopped by the park to look at his mail. He just didn’t want to go home just yet. He spent about half an hour leafing through his catalogs. He wished he had the money to order some of the nice lingerie in the Frederick’s of Hollywood catalog. Checking his watch, he hurried to the car. He wanted to be home before anyone else got there.

As he turned into the driveway, he could see his neighbor taking packages out of her trunk. He pulled up all the way to the garage. He wished that he had a garage door opener, so he could drive right in and close the door without getting out of the car. He scrunched down in the seat and waited. Watching in the mirror, he knew he could see her as she went into the house. What a day. It seemed that he couldn’t avoid this menace from next door. She seemed determined to catch him.

It was such a nice day out; he just had to step out in the backyard for a little while. There was light breeze blowing and it rustled his dress deliciously around his legs. He was pretty regular at dressing now. Mom had condoned it. So as long as Dad never caught him, it would be all right. He knew he was calling it a little close but he wouldn’t be long. It had been almost a week. His sister was supposed to be taking care of him, but she wanted to borrow a book from a friend down the street. Patrick knew she never spent less than an hour there, so he decided to indulge himself. He was sure that he would be through well before she got back.

It must have been the intoxication of his dress blowing around his legs. Somehow he over stayed himself in the backyard. As he came in the door, he heard footsteps on the stairway. His sister’s voice sounded.

“Patrick? Are you hiding down here?

He dashed for the storage room. Too late!

“You’re wearing my clothes again. How could you! Mom said you promised that you wouldn’t do it again.”

“These aren’t your clothes anymore. They’re the ones you gave up last time Mom took you shopping. She gave them to me so I wouldn’t have to invade your privacy when I want to play dress-up.”

“She did not. She wouldn’t give you my old clothes. You got into them yourself. I’m telling her.”

“Go ahead.”

“Well anyway, get out of them. I don’t believe you. Unless Mom tells me it’s OK, I won’t believe it.”

Later, when Mom came home, he heard Julie in the kitchen.

“Mom, Patrick was in the basement today wearing my old clothes. He said you gave them to him. You didn’t, did you?”

“Well... yes I did. He didn’t seem to be able to keep his promise not wear your clothes. I felt you had a valid complaint about him invading your privacy, so I provided some clothes that he could wear without getting into your things.”

“You gave him my old clothes? Dad will be fit to be tied when he finds out.”

“Well, he seems able to keep away from your father. I wasn’t planning on telling him and I would appreciate it if you didn’t either. I’m sure that this is just a phase Patrick is going through.”

“If it’s OK with you, it’s OK with me. As long as he doesn’t get into my current wardrobe, I guess I can live with it.”

Patrick took his mail up to his room and hid it in the shelves he built in the attic access. He gathered up all the leftovers from this mornings’ preparation and started down to the basement. He took a little time to admire himself in the mirror. He looked just as good as he had this morning. His dress showed a few wrinkles from the seat belt, but they would hang out.

Down the stairs he went picking up his purchases as passed though the living room. As he came into the kitchen, Mom walked in from the garage.

“Hi dear. Did you have fun today?” she asked almost casually.

“Yes,” he replied.

“What did you do?” She always wondered about where he could go dressed like that.

“I went shopping with the money Grandma sent me and then I went to see ‘Tootsie,’” he told her.

“Shopping? What did you buy?”

“Two dresses and two purses.”

“Can I see?”

“Sure.” He laid the packages on the counter.

Patrick opened his sack and took out the first dress and held it up to himself with one hand and held the purse in front of him with the other.

“That a cute dress, I bet you’ll look really nice in it.” He lay that one across the table and picked up the next and did the same. “That one is particularly cute. You have almost an hour before your father gets home. Would you like to model them for me?”

“Oh yes” he replied. Mom was really getting used to seeing him all dressed up. Last Christmas, she had a special present lying on his bed when he went back upstairs after the initial present opening. It was a perfume set. The bubble bath that he had used last night was in it. He quickly skipped down to the basement storage room. Hanging the two dresses in the wardrobe, he slipped out of his dress and put on the first one.

Back in the living room, he walked first away from her, then turned slowly, pausing, and walked back. “Very nice dear. That’s a good color on you,” she said smiling. A few minutes later, he was back with the other dress for a repeat performance. “I really like that one. It makes you look very, … ah, feminine.” She still had a little trouble with that. He wanted to look feminine. He could never really explain why he wanted to, but that’s what he wanted; to look feminine. Time was up, he had to change.

“Well, it looks like I’m stuck baby-sitting you for the week end, while Mom and Dad are at the company retreat,” Julie told him. Their parents had just boarded the cab to the airport. They wouldn’t be back until late Sunday night. Well after Patrick’s bedtime.

Patrick was sitting on the couch watching TV. “I suppose that if I leave you alone even for a minute, you’ll be down stairs putting on your dress.”

“Could be,” Patrick retorted.

“Why do you dress like that anyway?” she asked.

“I don’t know. It just feels good. It’s so different from my usual clothes. It feels neat.”

Julie shrugged her shoulders. “Why don’t you just go down now and change. Why bother waiting until I leave. As a matter of fact, you could spend the entire weekend dressed as a girl, for all I care.”

“You really don’t care?” Patrick questioned.

“No. Not really. I know you do it every chance you get anyway. If you want to spend the weekend as a girl, go ahead. I’ll even give one of my nightgowns I don’t wear much anymore.”

Now there was an idea whose time had come. The whole weekend as a girl. After a few moments Patrick went to the basement storage room. Looking at his selection, he hesitated. Was she serious or just goading him into something she could ridicule him with? Well, whatever, he was going to do it. Even if she teased him at least he would have a little time in a dress. He really didn’t get much opportunity he only had about twenty minutes home alone after school. He used to be able to tell Mom he was going to the basement to play when Dad was on a business trip. However, he hadn’t traveled as much these last two months. If Julie was serious, he could start coming home after school and dressing without worrying about her catching him. Mom got home a half hour before Dad. He could wait until then to change. That would give him almost two hours any day he wanted.

He put on a yellow dress with white trim and a pair of knee socks and black flats. He paused at the bottom of the steps. Gathering his courage, he mounted the steps. In the kitchen, he faltered. Standing near the sink he just couldn’t bring himself to purposely walk into the room where Julie was. Nervously he got a glass of water. When he turned around Julie was leaning against the door post.

“Well, that took long enough. I thought you had tripped on the stairs or something. Turn around, let’s have a look at you.” Patrick stepped away from the sink and turned around clumsily. “That dress fits good. Do the other things fit that well?” Patrick shook his head yes. “You need a little help with your hair. Come with me,” she commanded, turning for the stairs.

In the bathroom, she brushed his hair and put some barrettes in. “Wanna wear fingernail polish?” she asked when she was through. Patrick’s eyes got big.

“Sure,” he said. She held his hands one at a time and put on the same pink polish she usually wore.

“Keep your nails from touching anything until they are dry. You can speed that up by blowing on them or waving them around,” she told him.

When he went to bed that night there was the promised nightgown. It seemed really strange to not go downstairs to change. He carefully laid his dress across the bed and put on the nightie. It was delicious. He fell asleep peacefully.

The next morning, he took yesterday’s dress to the basement and put on a light green plaid. He topped it off with a pair of lace cuff socks. His sister encouraged him to take another dress up to his room. That way he wouldn’t have to make a trip in the nightgown, come morning.

Sunday night just before bed, Julie helped him get all the fingernail polish off. He spent one more night in the nightgown. In the morning, he got up early and putting on his robe, took his pajamas to the basement.

He changed quickly. Then set up his make-up mirror on in the window sill. He carefully removed his make-up. He was still in the bathroom washing his face when he heard his father come home. That had been close.

That evening Patrick was looking in the classified ads in hopes of finding a job. He wasn’t sure he really wanted a job. After all, now he could dress almost anytime he wanted to. At least any day he wanted to. He knew it was hopeless to look under nursing. His father had dashed any hopes of that. He just had to peruse that section anyway. To his surprise, he spotted something that caught his eye.

It read:

He was a high school graduate and over eighteen and in good health. If he could just stall Dad for six weeks. He was sure that Mom could arrange that. He’d have to be careful how he worded the announcement to Dad. He wasn’t sure what a CNA was, but it had something to do with nursing. Dad had made himself perfectly clear on that subject.

The next day, he called Ilene Roberts. She was very pleasant and invited him to come in for an interview on Wednesday at 9:00. Classes were to begin a week from Monday and they still had plenty of room for more students. Elder Care was across town and would require an hour’s drive. Patrick was up and out of the house by 7:30. He didn’t want to be late.

During the interview, Patrick recounted his desire to study nursing. He explained that he would be doing that now except he had no funds available for college. He was pleased to find out that Elder Care had a program that encouraged their CNA’s to pursue education. After two years, Elder Care would pick-up half the tuition of any medical education. What’s more they were able to help locate student loans for most of the CNA’s to take care of the remaining half.

He drove home and seeing mom’s car there he burst through the door excitedly and raced into the living room. “Mom! Mom!” he called “Good news!”

“In here dear,” she called from the kitchen. “What is it sweetheart?”

“I got a job! Or at least I will have a job when I get through training.”

“Where at?”

“Elder Care Nursing Home.”

“Elder Care? What kind of job is it?”

“CNA. The classes are free and they hire you when you graduate. They’re state recognized classes and after passing the State Boards I’ll be a Certified Nursing Assistant.”

“Oh, Patrick. I don’t know about that. You know what your father said.”

“Yeah. He said, ‘He wasn’t going to pay anyone to turn his son into a pantywaist male nurse.’ That’s the beauty of this. It’s close to what I want to do and the classes are free and only take six weeks. He doesn’t have to pay.”

“Well, just the same, why don’t you just not mention it to him until you have to? You can go ahead and start your classes. I’ll try to figure out how to tell him without getting him all upset. Let’s see. You’re training for the health care field. You’re going to be technician. That’s it, a technician. I’ll just forget what kind. You need six weeks training. We won’t say anything until you start classes.

Classes would be out for spring break on Friday. Patrick was looking forward to that. Julie had begun actually encouraging him to dress up. She even gave him a dress and some more shoes. Mom knew he was dressing after school. She had come home early one afternoon. Patrick was just coming upstairs from the basement as she came into the kitchen.

“Patrick! Your sister is in the living room!” she hissed hoarsely.

“I know,” Patrick told her. “She just gave me this dress and these shoes. She wanted to see how I looked in them.”

After that, Patrick didn’t bother to change clothes until Mom got home.

Monday of spring break, Patrick went down to his wardrobe and dressed as soon as he got up. He spent the whole day in a dress until Mom got home. The day was quite different then he would have imagined six months ago. Julie had fixed his hair and retied his bow behind his back. She really paid attention to him. Always before, when she had to take care of him, she always tried to find some place to send him. Being unsuccessful at that she would ignore him as much as possible.

Tuesday was a repeat of Monday. When Patrick was coming out of the bathroom, he heard Julie talking.

“OK, I see you then. I’ve got to hang up now. Remember to wait.” Then he heard the phone being hung up.

Patrick wondered about that as he came down the stairs.

“Hey!” Julie said. “Want to help me bake a cake?”

“Sure.”

Julie led the way into the kitchen and began getting out ingredients. They preheated the oven and mixed the up the cake batter. By the time they were ready to pour it into the pans, the oven was hot. They put the cake in the oven and started the frosting. The recipe called for the batter to be beaten by hand for fifty strokes. That job fell on Patrick. Julie went into the living room while he was beating the frosting. When he got through, he called to Julie.

“I beat it fifty times. Now what?”

“Just put it on the counter. We’ll have to wait for the cake to get done and cool before we can frost it.”

Patrick put the frosting on the counter and went into the living room. He had walked three steps into the room before, he realized Julie wasn’t alone. Her friend Margie was sitting on the couch. Patrick froze.

“Margie, I’d like you to meet my ‘sister’ Patricia.”

“Hi Patricia. You look cute in that dress. I remember when Julie used to wear that dress.” Then to Julie. “You were right he’s … she’s adorable.”

Patrick wasn’t sure that he liked someone outside the family knowing about his episodes of dress up. Margie got up and came over to him and looked him over carefully “I think you’re cute. You should dress that way all the time.” Just then the timer went off.

“We were just making a cake. Want to help, Margie?” Julie asked.

“Sure.”

They went into the kitchen and took the cake out of the oven and put it on cooling racks. Julie examined the frosting and pronounced it well mixed. The girls sat at the kitchen table with glasses full of pop and talked about boys occasionally soliciting comments from Patrick. Usually when Julie and her friends talked like this, they shooed him away saying it was girl talk.

On Wednesday Margie showed up early and brought a large garbage bag of clothes.

“Here Patricia. I’ve been wondering what to do with these. I’ll be glad to know that someone is getting some use out of them. I don’t have a little sister. Julie is so lucky to have one.” She began taking things out of the bag. There were mostly dresses and a few skirts and blouses. There were three pairs of shoes. On top of that there were two nighties. The girls insisted that he give them a fashion show and model his “new” clothes.

After that, Margie was over every day. On Friday, it was very hot. They went out of the basement and set up lawn chairs near the house where the neighbors couldn’t see Patricia. Julie brought out a card table and they played cards. While they were playing cards the girls openly plotted to make Patricia look more like a real girl. They also planned outings for the summer.

“It’s getting late. I’d better be going. I don’t think your mother would take to kindly to me knowing about Patricia. It’s been fun this week. We’ll have even more fun this summer. It’s hard to believe that we start classes again on Monday.

Classes started on Monday of the first week in October. Patrick was there early. He liked school; it was good to be back in class again. They didn’t even tell his Dad about the training for two weeks. After that, Patrick tried very hard to avoid Dad. He went so far as to fake a weekend away so that he could avoid him over the weekend. He was successful for two more weeks. Dad was supposed to go out of town for the weekend but the trip was canceled at the last minute. Dad questioned him over Sunday breakfast.

“So what kind of job are you training for?”

“Ah well, it’s just an assistant’s position. But if I stick with the job, they will help me get college credits to move up.”

“So who will you assist?”

“The ah, floor supervisor.”

“Is that the job you can move up to?”

“Ah yeah. Not many can hack the college necessary while they work, but I think I can do it. I like school and always do well in whatever subject I take.”

“Yeah, you were always good in school you made me proud. Will you be like getting some sort of degree?”

“Ah yeah it’s like an associate’s degree. Then, I’ll take some time off and go back for another two years to complete my studies. The best part is I can keep working the whole time. They pay for half the training and juggle my schedule to fit my class time and then give me a raise each time I complete a course.”

“What sort of courses will you be studying?”

“Oh science, mostly.”

“And what kind of degree will you get when you all through? A BS?”

“Well yeah. The equivalent of a BS for this field.”

“What field is it?”

“Geriatrics.”

“Geriatrics? Isn’t that like old people? Where are you training?

Patrick looked down at his plate. “Elder Care,” he said softly.

“Where?”

“Elder Care.”

“What kind of place is that?”

“A nursing home.”

“A NURSING HOME! Gwen, did you hear that Patrick’s studying at a nursing home. I thought you told me he was going to be some kind of technician.”

“I have to go hit the books,” Patrick said standing up.

“Wait just a minute. You tell me straight out what are you studying to be?”

“A CNA.”

“And just what is a CNA?”

“A Certified Nursing Assistant.”

“And what’s this ‘Degree’ you can study for?”

“An LPN.”

“An LPN. That’s some kind of nurse isn’t it?”

“Yes.”

“I thought I told you that you couldn’t become a nurse.”

“You said you weren’t going to pay anyone to make me a nurse. You don’t have to pay. The company and I will pay.”

Mom, bless her heart, intervened. “Dear. He just said he needed to go study. Patrick you go study and your father and I will talk about this.”

Patrick started out the door and his father called after him.

“Don’t go study. Either you quit and get a real job or find someplace else to live.”

Patrick kept on moving. Dad was too hot to reason with. “Now just calm down.” He could hear his Mom talking. “He can’t find another place to live today. Give him thirty days' notice. You don’t evict someone on a moment's notice.” Patrick got out of the house as quickly as he could.

He walked to the neighborhood park. He sat on the swing and began pushing back and forth slowly. He wished it was like it was when he was a kid. He had liked coming to this park with his sister and Margie.

It was the last week in June. Margie had come over almost every day since school was out. They had spent the nearly three weeks coaching him how to look more like a girl. They put fingernail polish on him every morning. They had him out in the back playing jump rope. That was a good way to enjoy the feel of his dress. It just bounced up and down against his legs as he jumped.

They also experimented with his hair to make it look more feminine. They had settled on trimming his bangs and teasing them. After that, they sprayed them with hair spray to keep them up. Margie brought over some tights and he got his first experience with that special feeling of closely fitting feminine clothes on his legs.

This week Margie was there as soon as his parents were out of the house. They got him dressed as quickly as possible and spirited him out the basement door. They left the property by the side of the house and through the ally. There were board fences or thick hedges all along. At the park the first thing they did was to push him on the swings. They played with him on the teeter totter. Of course they had a rope and he played jump rope. Around 11:00 they made their way home. Patrick was very nervous. They managed to get home without incident. Going hadn’t been too bad, but Patrick was a nervous wreck on the way back. All in all, it was very exciting. An episode that was repeated often that summer. Late in August, The girls decided that it was time to expose Patricia to the real world. They took him for a long walk and boarded a bus downtown. They took him to a movie. That happened twice. A very exciting summer indeed. All too soon, it was over. He had to go back to school.

He stayed out late and sneaked back in when the house was dark. He got up early and went to class. That evening, he had the eventual meeting with Mom.

“Well, I talked your father into giving you a month to find a place to live. It would probably be better if you tried to avoid him in that time. I have some money set aside and I’ll loan you whatever you need to get an apartment. I will, however, need to insist it be a loan. Your father would never forgive me if he found out I gave you the money. It is supposed to be for our vacation next year.”

“Thanks Mom, I have already been looking around. There’s an apartment near Elder Care that a lot of the CNA’s live at. There is an opening there. It will take $1200.00 to move in.”

“I’ll write you a check. You had better get the money to them tomorrow. Your father will throw you out bodily if you’re here one day past the thirty days.

That day, after class, Patrick went to the apartment house and put a deposit on the apartment. It was a studio. The nice thing about it was that it was in the corner of the building and had a little patio. None of the other apartments did. There was a little break in the hedge that would allow him access to the over flow parking lot. He would have a nearly private way to let Patricia out. She would surely want out a lot. He would be dressed as Patricia daily. At least for a while anyway.

Every summer, Patrick dressed daily and went out with Julie and Margie. By the time he was in high school, he would go out by himself. Just for the fun of it. He was very good at make-up. Margie had instituted teaching him while he was still in the sixth grade. With three years to practice he was as good as most Junior girls while he was still a freshman. Mom discovered he was going out dressed the summer of his Sophomore year.

He let himself in the basement door one afternoon. To his surprise, Mom was doing wash. She was obviously on the third load, since both washer and dryer were going and she was folding a load.

“Patrick. You were out of the house dressed like that?”

“Yeah, I’ve been going out for years. Nobody even looks twice at me.”

“Well, you do look very much like a girl. I’m just afraid the neighbors will see you coming or going and say something to your Dad.”

“I don’t think that will happen. I can get to the ally without anyone spotting me. By the time I have to worry about anyone seeing me, I’m a block away. I always walk over to the next bus route to take the bus.”

“When did you start going outside dressed up?”

“In the fifth grade.”

“No one has ever suspected you’re not a girl? Not in all that time?”

“Nobody who gave me any indication of it.”

“Well, it’s a little late to worry about that now. You just be sure that nobody ever does.”

No one at the nursing home knew about him as a cross-dresser and he would do everything to make sure that no one ever did. His training drew to a close. It finished with floor time. The first day was on Halloween day. When he got to the floor he is assigned to, he noticed that everyone in some kind of costume. Some of the girls were in simple costumes like clown make-up but most were in elaborate get ups. He even had to take some ribbing about being in a CNA’s costume. After all, he wasn’t technically a CNA until he took the state boards. The next day he had off and moved into his apartment. He took the wardrobe that had been the keeper of his girl’s wardrobe and put in the corner of his apartment and let it continue its role. His regular clothes went in the dresser and closet that came with the apartment. Only his panties were in the dresser. He hadn’t worn men’s underwear since he had satisfied his gym requirements in high school.

Patrick fell into the routine of work and established friendships with his classmates and some of the younger CNA’s. As it turned out, he was the only male CNA on his shift and one of only three in the whole nursing home. On Thanksgiving they had a pot luck dinner for the staff. In addition to the regular fare usually served on holidays. Patrick got his mother’s recipe for candied sweet potatoes and cooked them up for the group. At Christmas they had a staff Christmas party. Everyone drew a name and exchanges gifts. New Year's Eve he went to a party given by Elaine. He tried not to drink too much because he had to work New Year's Day. The coworker friendships grew. Many times he and some of the girls went to movies together when they had the same day off.

Patrick missed his family but his sister was off to school and his father had forbidden him to come to the house until he got a real job. His mother kept in touch and visited him now and then. In all fairness, his sister did call him over the Christmas holidays. On Valentine's Day, they all exchanged cards. Most of them were the kind that kids give out, but Patrick got each of his friends a special card. He was careful not to make them romantic. After all, they were just friends. On Easter there were cards from the special friends again. He had Memorial Day off and got together with some friends for a picnic. He worked the Fourth of July, but made it to a barbecue at one of the girl’s homes after work.

Labor Day meant another barbecue. Because he had the day off, he volunteered to be the barbecue chef at a picnic. He was the hit of the party. It was a little sad for him. It made him think of his father and how he missed the family barbecues. However, he got into the swing of things when the hamburgers started coming off the grill.

Before he knew it the first of October had come around. There was much discussion about what everyone would wear for Halloween. A memorandum was handed out cautioning all employees that while dressing up for Halloween was within company policy all costumes must be in good taste. That is to say that realistic horror costumes, such as bloody wounds, mummies, and vampires should be avoided. The suggestions of approved costumes included firemen, policemen, dancers etc.

One girl was coming as gypsy, another as a princess. Other costumes included ballerina, charwomen and one girl said that she would come as a man. When asked what he would wear, Patrick was at a loss for what to say. He would have liked to say a woman, but was afraid too. The girl, who was coming as a man, suggested that he come as a woman. They could be a couple. The others all laughed and some told him that it was a good idea. His charge nurse was chief among the supporters. “You’d fit right in with all the other girls on this shift,” she told him with a smile.

He had long ago bought himself a CNA style woman’s uniform with a skirt instead of pants and the white stockings and nurses’ shoes to go with it. He decided to go with it. At work he was complimented on his appearance. Everyone agreed that he could pass for a woman anywhere.

He was assigned to one of the problem patients (Mrs. Schmitt) who complained loudly whenever she was bathed. It didn’t seem to matter who it was; she made a fuss for all of them. That time she was happy as a lark when he bathed her. Everyone noticed. The charge nurse commented, “Maybe you ought to dress like that every day so we can get through the bath schedule without all the fuss.”

The girl who dressed as a man was not nearly so convincing. She was too slight built and too much bust. She made a fuss over him all day. She called him “Patricia.” The next day, she pretended to be disappointed when he showed up in his regular uniform.

On his next paycheck he got his one year bonus. That was cause to celebrate. He got dressed and went out shopping on his next day off. He bought three nice outfits and took in a movie.

The job just kept grinding along. Thanksgiving came and went with the usual pot luck. Patrick brought pumpkin pie. He had to work on Christmas and got a little surprise at the staff party.

The girl who got his name was the one who dressed as a man on Halloween. She got him a set of “Days of the Week” panties. Seven panties in different pastel colors with the days of the week embroidered on them. Patrick was embarrassed when she told him that after his performance on Halloween, she thought maybe he could use them. Someone wanted to know if they were the right size. Patrick bucked up his courage and stood up holding them to his waist and pronounced them the correct size. He took them home and began wearing them. Wouldn’t they all be surprised if they knew that he was really glad to get them for Christmas?

Patrick had to work New Year's Eve, but got New Year's Day off. As he reported back to work, his charge nurse said that they needed to go the administrator’s office. Once there, he was ushered directly in. It seemed that Mrs. Schmitt’s daughter was insisting that the girl who had been assigned to her mother on Halloween be assigned permanently. Mrs. Schmitt had talked about nothing else. Every visit was punctuated with the comment that she wanted that “nurse” and no other. What could be done?

“Well I don’t know. That was me. I was just wearing a Halloween costume. I never thought that anyone would believe I was really a woman. Least of all any of the patients.”

“Well her daughter will be here any minute. She was quite adamant about having that ‘girl’ assigned for at least one shift. I hope she will become more rational after she meets you.”

The daughter, Mrs. Durham, arrived and was ushered in. After preliminary introductions, the administrator explained to her that Patrick was the “nurse” in question and that it was only a costume.

“Apparently, it was a good costume because Mother took him to be a new CNA and liked her... him,” Mrs. Durham said. “What would it take to get you into costume every day?” she continued looking a Patrick.

Patrick resisted (only halfhearted)

“How about a thousand dollars right now,” She said taking out her check book and beginning to write, “and a hundred dollars a week over and above your regular salary. In addition I will buy all necessary clothes to pull it off.”

“Mrs. Schmitt is only 55 and suffering from Alzheimer’s,” Patrick complained. “She might live another thirty years.”

“OK, I’ll throw in $1000.00 a year bonus for every year she lives, plus a $100.00 a month clothing allowance at my family’s clothing store.”

“Patrick,” the head administrator put in, “it seems that she is quite serious that you do this. You are getting what amounts to $7,400.00 a year. That’s quite a bonus for wearing a skirt. That more than your salary tax free. That’s like adding another 25%. I’d say you would be a fool to turn it down. It’s only at work. In your off hours you can dress however you like.”

Patrick agreed. He wouldn’t dream of telling her that is how he dresses in his off hours.

When he returned to the floor, Patrick found out how fast the rumor mill could work. One of the girls had been there when the call came down from upstairs and knew what it was about. By the time he arrived on the scene, so did everyone else. The girl who had given him the panties commented that he would be needing them after all. That was the start of some light hearted ribbing by all. The charge nurse finally came to his rescue and explained that he had been bribed to the tune of seven grand a year to wear a skirt to work. Now those who were teasing became jealous.

Mrs. Durham picked him up after work and took him to a uniform shop and bought him five uniforms and two pair of quality nurses shoes. At the lingerie shop she bought him five new bras and two pair of prosthetics to put in them. She also bought four slips and six pair of white nylons and a girdle of his choosing. She told him to come by the family clothing store on his next day off so she could set him up with a letter of credit.

With some fear and trepidation he began wearing the outfits to work. Immediately Mrs. Schmitt was at ease in the bath again. At first the other girls made a fuss about him looking so good. By his next day off the comments had died down to something reasonable. All of the residents took the changeover in stride. The last big laugh of the group was wondering what he would wear for Halloween now. Even Patrick had to laugh when someone suggested he could come as a man.

When he showed up at the “family clothing store,” he found out it was woman’s shop. No, men’s clothes at all. Mrs. Durham gave him a letter of credit and set up an account in the computer. He found out he didn’t have to use the $100.00 each month. He could let it accumulate and buy something more expensive if he likes.

When he got home, he discovered the account and letter of credit were in the name of Patricia. He would have to go as his femme self when he went unless he contacted Mrs. Durham and arranged to come in when she was there. It’s almost as if she expects that he will, or does, like wearing women’s clothes and will want to wear them more than at work.

By Valentine's Day, he had immersed himself in being Patricia. He parked in the overflow lot at home and came and went through his patio door. The only time he dressed as Patrick was when the girls at work decided to go to a movie on his day off, so he met them at the theater.

He saw them waiting in line as he parked his car. They were easy to spot. The line was in the late evening shadows and they were all dressed in white. He was fortunate enough to park on about 100 yards from them.

Walking up to them, he said. “Hi, you guys got here quick.”

“Oh, it’s you Patric... Patrick. I didn’t recognize you without your make ... uniform and all the stuff that goes with it,” Mary said

“Me too,” Glynnis told him.

“They’re right,” agreed Lynn. “I mean, I knew that you were just dressing up at work, but somehow I expected to see you... you know, dressed more like you do at work. I guess we’ve just become use to you that way.”

They all laughed, perhaps a little nervously.

By Easter, he had found an out of the way shop and began having his light beard remove by electrolysis. Julie called him during spring break and wanted to come over. She arrived about 10:00 the next day. Patrick was wearing a pair of baggy women’s shorts and a woman’s sweat shirt. His shoes were women’s deck shoes. A pretty unisex outfit. If it weren’t for the bra you wouldn’t have noticed that he wasn’t dressed as a man. He had let his hair grow really long and had it in a ponytail.

Julie walked in and looked around. “So this is your bachelor pad,” she said. Then she turned to look at him and noticed his bra. “Or is it a bachelorette pad?”

He smiled and said. “Mostly a bachelorette pad.”

She walked to the wardrobe and opened it she was surprised to see his uniforms. She took out two and held them up. “Why so many uniforms?” she asked.

“Ah well, it’s a long story.” He recounted his transformation to Patricia at work. Julie was fascinated.

“You must be in seventh heaven. You can literally wear a dress all the time. I’m surprised you aren’t dressed more feminine right now.”

“I knew I would have to answer the front door and I wanted to at least appear to pass as masculine.”

“How do you get to and from work? Or do you take your uniform and change there?”

“No I come and go through the patio door. I added an outside lock.”

“Well, I was going to suggest that we have lunch together and maybe take in a movie. You could put on a nice daytime dress if you like.”

Patrick had always enjoyed his sister’s company when he was wearing a dress. He had fond memories of Julie and Margie taking him to the movies as a little girl. He took stockings and a slip to the bathroom and emerged in about fifteen minutes in full make-up. His sister had seen him in a slip many times while he was growing up. He opened the closet and picked out a summery dress. (Summer dresses were always his favorite.)

“All that’s missing is Margie,” he remarked as he checked his purse to see if he had his keys.

“I could call her and see if she wants to meet us there.”

“That would be fun.”

Julie picked up the phone and dialed. “Margie? Hey, I’m visiting my brother and we were going to get some lunch and take in a movie. You want to meet us? It’ll be just like old times.” She paused a moment. “Yes he is. I told you, just like old times.” Another pause. “Oh he looks really good... Lots of practice I guess.... OK let’s say Skippers near the tri-cinema?” she said looking at Patrick. “In a half an hour? OK, see you there.”

Julie took a turn in the bathroom freshening up her make-up. They left by way of the patio and used Patrick’s car. They were still in line when Margie showed.

“Oh Patricia, you do look good,” she said in hushed tones when she joined them. They had a quiet lunch and went to the movie. After, they all went back to Patrick’s apartment. They caught up on old times and promised to do it all again sometime.

He had to work Memorial Day so when he got off he went straight to the barbecue at Dorothy’s house without changing. Nobody seemed to notice. They were all used to him as Patricia. After all, the charge nurse had gotten him a new name tag that read, “Patricia.” By now, it would seem strange if he had dressed any other way. Patrick realized he was living his fantasy. He was accepted at work wearing women’s clothes.

In the first week of June, a movie came out that was all the buzz at work and one day several of the girls at work planned to go right after work. Patrick was invited to go with them. There were four girls that actually went. They all stood in line and bought tickets. Afterward they stopped for coffee and pie.

The next day. Mary was talking with Patrick at break.

“Did you like the movie last night?”

“Oh yeah. I thought it was really good.”

“I thought, while I was driving to the theater, that you might feel uncomfortable. You know, since you didn’t have a chance to go home and change. But you seemed to take it all in stride. You must be getting used to playing the part of a woman.”

“Well yes, I guess you could say I am. I don’t get paranoid anymore that someone will notice that I’m not a woman.”

“How to you feel about wearing a dress or a skirt every day?”

“Well, actually, it’s more comfortable than pants. Once you develop the necessary reactions to keep from showing what kind of underwear you’re wearing, it’s gives you more freedom of movement. It’s cooler on hot days.”

“What about pantyhose. Don’t you find them uncomfortable?”

“Not really. As a matter of fact, they really feel good to me. I mean, it’s almost kind of sexy.”

“Just between you and me. Have you worn the panties you got for Christmas?

Patrick looked around. Finding no one else in earshot. “Promise not to tell. But I have and I really kind of like them.” He felt the need to suggest that he was inexperienced in wearing panties. “Enough so, I was tempted to go buy some more.”

“Why didn’t you?”

“Well, I feel kind of weird about it. I wear a dress, slip, pantyhose and a bra most days. I have seven pair already. There are only seven days in the week. If I bought more I really wouldn’t have any use for them all they would be for it to replace these when they wear out. Buying panties for myself would mean I had crossed over some sort of invisible line. I mean, it’s bad enough that I wear the other things. When I have the panties on, I ... I really feel feminine. That kind of scares me. I mean, because I like it.”

“If you like it, you should do it. From what you’ve told me, I’d bet that if you were to wear panties for two weeks straight including your days off, you’d be ready to throw out your men’s underwear.

“Have you ever worn anything other than a CNA uniform?”

Patrick was amazed at her acceptance of the whole thing. So he made up a story about dressing as a child. Something that would make it seem more innocent that just wanting to wear his sister's clothes.

“Well, when I was about 10 or 11 my sister and one of her friends wrote a play for them to do for some other friends. I helped my sister study her lines. They sold tickets and everything. We built a stage in her friend's backyard. Actually, we just strung blankets in front of the back porch for a curtain. The morning of the play, her friend was taken to the hospital with appendicitis. She and her friend had already spent the money they got for the tickets. She persuaded me to put on the friends clothes and play the other part. I was the only one who knew the lines. I had to do it.”

“So you appeared on stage as a girl.”

“What was worse was that her friend wanted to see the play with me in her roll. So when she got out of the hospital, I had to do it again in her room. They were really stage struck and were always trying to write plays two or three times a summer, they would sucker their friends into paying to see their backyard drama. Later that year, they did another play with a part for me and her friend insisted that I play a girl again. Her friend also insisted on dress rehearsals. So I wore a dress most of the day for several days.”

“You had quite an acting career that summer.”

“It happened again the next year. In the third year, my Dad caught wind of it and forbid me to appear as a girl any more. My sister’s friend didn’t want to write parts for boys.”

“Your great career was cut short.”

“The truth was we all stunk. The kids paid ten cents a ticket and only then because my sister’s friend was the neighborhood bully. Which is why I agreed to appear in the plays after the first one.”

“I sounds like you spent some time in a dress those two summers, anyway.”

“Yeah, I guess I did.”

“What was it like?”

“I don’t know. Actually, it was kind of fun. They were hot summers and my folks always dressed me in jeans. They were uncomfortably warm. I began to almost look forward to wearing the dress as a relief from the heat.”

“It was pretty warm in May. Did you wear a dress at home, ‘as a relief from the heat,’ then?”

“Well, I did leave my uniform on until it cooled off on a couple of the really hot days.”

“What’s it like to dress as a woman every day?”

“Well, at first, it was really strange. But after everyone began treating it as normal, I got used to it. I don’t even think twice about doing make up or fixing my hair any more. It’s just part of my routine when I get ready for work. As a matter of fact it seems strange when I dress as a man. Not quite as strange as when I first started dressing as a woman.”

“Do you ever dress as a woman when you’re not at work?”

“Well, I have caught myself in the bathroom in a bra and slip doing my make-up without thinking. Once I just finished it, put on a robe and sat around the house watching television that way.”

“Do you have any women’s clothes that are not a uniform?”

“I sure could have. The account the Mrs. Durham sat up is at a woman’s shop.”

“If you find it so comfortable, you should go get some clothes and lounge around the house. Or, you could even go out. You pass really well.”

Patrick felt the need to cover his tracks a little. “I’m not too sure about that. Going out after work because I don’t have time to change is one thing. I’d feel a little strange putting on some dress just to go out for no reason. Particularly a dress I didn’t really need.”

“OK, I’ll give you a reason. Your second day off is the same as my first day off this week. You get a dress and we’ll go to a movie on our common day off.”

“Are you kidding? You really want to go out with me while I’m wearing a dress?”

“Sure, why not. We did it the other night. It’ll give you a chance to explore just how much you like wearing dresses.”

“I’ll have to think about that one.”

In the end he couldn’t pass up the chance. Mary picked him up at his apartment. He gave her strict instructions to knock at his patio door. After the movie, Mary took them to a small cafe and they had desert and coffee.

“Well, how is it so far?” she asked him.

“Huh?”

“The clothes,” she whispered.

“Oh. Ah, I was nervous at first. Now it’s all right. It kind of feels like work but not really.”

“Are you wearing the ‘days of the week’?”

He grinned “Yes.”

“Are you going to wear them two weeks, like I suggested.”

“Ah, I might.”

“You’re a chicken if you don’t.”

“We’ll see.”

The next day Mary worked she leaned close to him and asked. “Today is Friday; does your underwear know that?” Patrick just nodded. “How about yesterday? Did it know then?”

“Yes,” he said grinning.

“Day three,” she said smiling.

All week, she kept asking. “Day four?”, “Day five?” and so on. On Thursday, after they had both taken their days off, she asked. “Day nine?”

Two days before Patrick’s day off, Mary invited him to go to another movie on their common day off. “Don’t wear the same dress,” she chided him when he accepted.

She picked him up again. Instead of just going straight to the movie she parked across the mall from the tri-cinema and they had lunch in the food court. On the way to the theater, Mary kept stopping in shops to look at clothes. She tried on a few and talked Patrick into doing the same. He had a hard time not showing how much he really was enjoying this.

They got to the mall at 11:30 and it was 4:30 before they got to the theater. After the movie, Mary insisted they go for dinner at an Italian restaurant. By the time they were back at Patrick’s apartment, it was 10:30. They sat in the parking lot talking.

“By the time I see you again, it will be day fifteen. Will your underwear know it?” she asked.

“I think so. Do you want to know the truth?” he asked and she smiled and nodded. “When I bought this dress, I also bought two packages of panties. You were right. I’m going to get rid of my men’s underwear. I really like wearing panties.”

“You have two dresses now. Do you think you’ll be wearing them on your days off now?”

“Probably. I hope I don’t get bored with just two.”

“You could always go shopping again. You pass well enough to try on before you buy it.”

“I’d feel self-conscious going out in a dress without someone to run interference if I needed it,” Patrick said. He really liked having a real woman around while he was dressed.

“I could go with you if you like.”

Mary picked up Patricia on their next common day off and they went to Mrs. Durham’s store. Patricia had $600.00 worth of credit. She bought six dresses, three pairs of shoes and purses. She also bought several accessories. She tried on over a dozen dresses in the process. Mrs. Durham waited on them personally and managed to sell Mary some clothes as well.

After that, Mary and Patricia went to a movie, dinner, lunch, shopping or some combination of the four at least once a month. On Labor Day, Mary told Patricia that she was losing a roommate on first of the month.

“My roommate is moving out on the first. I’ll have to find someone to share the rent quick. If I don’t I’ll have to move myself. Maybe I should get a studio like yours. How much do you pay for rent?”

“I pay $450.00 per month, but I wouldn’t recommend a studio. I chose it because of the price. You’d be better off to get another roommate.”

“The problem with roommates is finding one you are comfortable with. A roommate should also be a friend. You know you have to trust a roommate more than a friend. It’s almost like being married.”

“Have you asked around at work? I’m sure that someone would like to share an apartment.”

“No, you’re the first person I’ve mentioned it to. You know really, at work you’re the only person I feel close too. You wouldn’t be interested in sharing my apartment? The rent is only $650.00. You’re share would only be $325.00. That’s a savings of $150.00 a month. Four days a week, we could share a ride. That would save us money too.”

“Well now that I have to come and go as a woman. I kind of like the private entrance on my apartment.”

“Well, you’re pretty much living full time as a woman. If you move in as a woman no one will mind you coming and going in a dress. Besides, the apartment managers are a lesbian couple. What could they say about a cross-dresser?”

“It sounds tempting. If anyone here ever finds out that I’m full time, I could always say it’s because I have to keep up appearances at the apartment.”

“Yeah. Have you paid your rent yet this month?”

“No.”

“Why don’t you give notice and move in with me on the first.”

“I’ve never seen your apartment.”

“Let’s go over after work. My roommate will be at work.”

After they got off, Patrick followed Mary to her apartment.

“This of course is the living room,” Mary told him as they stepped inside. “That’s the kitchen,” she said, with a wave of her hand. Patrick walked in. It was nice. Dishwasher, built-in range with a microwave and a refrigerator. “The bathroom is at the end of the hall.”

It had a full tub and shower and the vanity had a double sink. Patrick was getting along with just a shower. “Your bedroom would be the one over here,” Mary told him as she opened the door.

It was spacious. There was room for a full sized bed and dresser. The closet was full width across one wall. That was a great deal more closet space then he was used to.

“I guess that I’ll be moving in on the first. It’s really nice.”

Patrick went home and wrote his notice of termination. He was glad he was renting month to month. His mother had wanted him to get a lease. She thought it would be insurance against raising of the rent.

On the first Patrick moved in with Mary. Now he was committed to living full time as a woman. Things were getting better and better. As he settled in he was surprised how casual Mary is about how she dressed. He was taken back the first time he saw her in a slip. After the initial shock he decided that really it covers as much as a dress. After all, Julie and Margie had seen him in a slip plenty of times when he was younger.

But when she first appeared with only a bra on top, he felt a little aroused. Especially since it wasn’t just a quick view. She was wearing a sexy black bra had come into the bathroom while he was putting on make-up. She stood next to him and began doing her make-up. Patrick tried not to notice. He had to finish his make-up leaning against the counter to hide his arousal. As soon as he was done, he took the towel he had used in the shower and held it in front of him so he could make his escape.

Mary also regularly came out for coffee in morning, wearing baby doll pajamas. One morning on their common day off, Patrick was in the living room. Mary walked toward the kitchen wearing a very sheer hip length nightie. It was black and was fastened with a bow tied between the breasts. It hung open down the front, revealing the matching sheer panties. Her nipples were clearly visible through the fabric.

She came back into the living room carrying a cup of coffee. She bent over and put it on the coffee table. As she did, the bow in the front slipped and came undone.

“Look at that,” she said, standing up. “This thing is always doing that.”

Patrick looked she was standing there with the nightie hanging open revealing her femininity. Patrick had been aroused when she first walked through. Now it was all he could do to keep from acting on his desire. He liked Mary a lot. If he had been a normal guy, he would have been dating her as a boyfriend. He wouldn’t have been satisfied with just being one of her friends at work. His relationship with her had been formed with him as a woman. He watched in awe of her beauty as she retied the nightie and sat down. He excused himself to the bathroom. He had to spend quite a bit of time there to get himself calmed down.
***
After lunch they were sitting at the table talking over coffee. Patrick decided he needed to broach the subject.

“Mary,” he started. “I’m not sure it’s working out. My living here, I mean.”

“Why not? You’ve been a perfect roommate these last three months. Have I done anything to upset you? If I have, just tell me and I’ll correct it right away. I really like having you for a roommate. It makes our outings much easier.”

“Well, it’s just that you’re such a good looking girl. I, well, I’m one hundred percent heterosexual. And you look good to me,” he blurted out. “I mean like this morning.”

“Oh, you mean when the nightie fell open,” she said blushing.

“Yeah, and before that even. Before it fell open it was very revealing.”

She still blushed. “I take it you liked what you saw?”

“Of course. I’m only wearing a dress. I’m not dead. I can handle you in a slip. With a little effort, I can even take you in your usual baby dolls. But that thing this morning was altogether too sexy even before it fell open.”

“You’d like me to wear a robe in the mornings?”

“Well it would help me keep myself under control. I mean, I was attracted to you before, I. ...” He stopped short. He hadn’t meant to say that.

“Oh,” she said. Now they were both embarrassed.

He noticed that she began wearing a house coat in the morning. But occasionally, she would be seen in her usual baby dolls. On their evenings out she took to wearing some strikingly beautiful dresses. They were often low cut. Sometimes they had very sexy slits up one thigh. One evening, she was wearing a particularly sexy outfit for dinner. The skirt was close fitting with a slit up the left thigh that revealed both inner thighs as she walked. The bodice was boat necked and bared a great deal of cleavage.

“That’s a pretty sexy outfit,” he told her.

“Do you like it?”

“Yes. It makes me jealous. I wish I could look that good.”

“I’d be glad to lend it to you some time,” she smiled.

“It looks a lot better on you then it would look on me,” he told her.

“Does it look good enough to catch the eye of my ‘Prince Charming?’”

“It certainly got my eye,” he said.

“That’s a good enough vote for me.”

It was Patrick’s turn to drive, so Mary had a few drinks after dinner. She wasn’t drunk but still her inhibitions were down a little. She laughed a little too easily and took Patrick’s arm and leaned into him a little on the way out to the car. When they got home, she turned to him and said. “From a man’s point of view do I really look good? I mean, you don’t think I’m too heavy? Or too tall?”

“Not to heavy and not too tall. Just right for my taste. As a matter of fact, I think you’re positively beautiful.”

“You’re not just saying that?”

“No! In that outfit, you’re sexy, very sexy.”

“You’re a sweetheart,” she told him and then abruptly put her arms around him and kissed him. At first he was surprised; then he found himself kissing back. She started to pull away and then held him even tighter and kissed on.

“Where did that come from?” she asked when they were through. “I’m sorry; I only intended that to be a friendly kiss. Somehow, I got carried away.”

“No. I’m the one who should apologize. I was the one who responded inappropriately. I should know that you didn’t want to be passionate with a cross-dresser.”

“Oh no. It’s not that you’re a cross-dresser. That doesn’t bother me at all. It’s just you’ve never indicated that you were even interested in me as anything but a friend. Even when I got careless and exposed myself,” she said.

“I didn’t think I’d have a chance with any woman who saw me in a dress. What’s more if they didn’t see me in a dress I couldn’t get serious with them because sooner or later they would see my underwear and know I was kinky.”

“You don’t have to worry about me. I already know you’re kinky. In truth, I liked that kiss. We could do it again if you like.”

They embraced in a long kiss. That was the beginning of a long relationship. As things developed, the girls at work became aware of Patricia being full time feminine. It happened one weekend. Patricia and Mary were taking in a movie after dinner on their common day off. As they were standing in line for tickets, three of the CNA’s from work walked up and began talking.

“Hi Mary; Patricia. What movie are you going to see?”

“Close Encounters,” Mary told them.

“You guys are sure dressed up for a movie.”

“We’ve just come from dinner.”

“Oh, where did you eat?”

“Maxi’s.”

“Oh, my boyfriend took me there for my birthday. Nice restaurant. What’s the occasion?”

“No occasion, we just like to get dressed up and go out that’s all.”

“Well you guys certainly look good. Patricia that dress is great. You’ll have to let me borrow it sometime.”

They got their tickets and went in. As they drove home, Patricia commented. “Well I wonder what the reaction at work will be tomorrow when the rest of the girls hear that I was out in a dress when I didn’t have to be.”

“I wouldn’t be concerned. Most of the girls are convinced that you were living full time as a woman already. You just confirmed what they suspected.”

However, rumors did begin to spread at work when Patricia dropped Mary at work when her car was in the shop and someone saw them kiss as she got out of the car. By the time Patricia was back at work they were full force. They had wanted to keep their romantic relationship just between them. However, like any gossip shop, the nursing home was rampant with all sorts of made up stories.

According to current rumor, Patrick and Mary had been lovers all along. In truth, they were just exploring their feelings for each other. It took many months for them to realize that their feelings were more than the natural attraction that could be expected from close association. It had been three months from their first kiss and they were just now making it a regular thing.

After that first kiss there was a period of strict hands off. And finally after some discussion, they decided that they should explore those feelings. Come Spring, they announced their engagement.

At a spontaneous engagement party at work, someone asked. “Which one will wear the wedding gown?”

“Patricia will,” Mary said without hesitation.

Later at home, they had the serious discussion.

“Mary, you answered for us at work, saying that I would wear the wedding dress. Were you serious?”

“I assumed you would want to. I really think you’d look good in a wedding dress. Of course I think you look good in any dress. After all, remember that I fell in love with you in a dress. I don’t think I would feel the same about if you didn’t wear them. What’s more, you’ve confided in me that you really like wearing dresses. I hope I didn’t speak out of turn. If you don’t want to, you don’t have to.”

“Well I was just thinking about you. What about your mother? Won’t she be expecting to see you in a wedding dress?”

“I think my mother will just be glad I’m getting married. When I told her that you were a guy she disapproved of my having a man live with me.”

“Does she know that I live as a woman?”

“No. I suppose that my family should meet you soon. I think maybe we should let them meet you and get to know you before we tell them about our engagement. Since we haven’t gotten around to a ring yet that should be fairly easy.”

They both had the Fourth of July off. Mary’s family invited her to come home for the weekend. She asked if she could bring her roommate. Her mother allowed as that would be OK.

Mary’s family lived about 300 miles away. They each arrange to get an extra day off by swapping with other girls at work. They decide that Mary’s folks should meet Patricia, not Patrick. They packed their bags before going to work and left as soon as they got off. They pulled into her folk’s driveway just before 10:00.

There were hugs and kisses for Mary from both her Mom and Dad. After a few moments, Mary’s Mom stopped short and looked at Patricia.

“Mary, who did you bring with you? I thought you were bringing your roommate, Patrick.”

“Oh, Mother, Dad. I want you to meet my roommate Patricia. Patricia, this is my mother, Martha and my Dad Fred.”

“Dear, I thought your roommate was a man named Patrick.”

“Patricia is a man named Patrick. Mom.”

Her mother sat down. “I’m sorry; did you say ‘Patricia is a man named Patrick.’?”

“Yes, mother. That’s right.”

Her Dad got a stern look on his face. “Mary, is this some kind of joke?”

“Mom, Dad, I’m sorry. I should have taken time to explain to you guys when I told you Patrick was moving in. It’s a long story. Patrick dressed up for Halloween the year before last and one of the patients took him to be a new CNA because he wore a woman’s CNA uniform. Well, all I can tell you is she decided she liked the Patricia better than any other CNA. Her daughter had some kind of pull with the front office and she ended up bribing Patrick to work a Patricia. When he moved in as my roommate, we decide that since he looked so good as a girl, it would be easier if he just dressed that way all the time. That was nearly a year and a half ago when the masquerade began. Everyone at work doesn’t even think about him being a man. He’s just one of the girl’s.”

“Well Patricia, is it? I guess I’m relieved to find that you live as a woman. I was concerned about my daughter’s morals when she told me she was getting a man for a roommate. I’m afraid that Fred had a speech all ready for you regarding your intentions toward our daughter.”

“I can assure you that you have no concern there. I have the highest respect for your daughter's morals. We sleep in separate bedrooms. However, I have to be honest with you. You may be confused by what you’ve seen on TV or perhaps at some night clubs. Fred, you may still want to give me that speech. I am not gay. I’m 100% heterosexual. I hope that you will understand that I didn’t have to be honest. It would have been easy to let you think I was gay. We could have avoided dealing with your concerns.”

“He’s right Mother and Dad. We could have but that would complicate matters later.”

“Look,” her Dad cut in. “It’s late and I can see this is going to be a complex discussion. And quite frankly, I was up early this morning and I’m about ready to drop in my tracks. I hadn’t planned on giving Patrick his lecture until tomorrow. I’m sure that you two are tired. Why don’t we take this up in the morning?”

“You’re father is right dear. Your old room is ready for you and Patricia can take the spare room. We’ll talk more in the morning.”

They said their goodnights and went upstairs. Mary showed Patrick to the spare room. Once inside, she said. “Well, that went rather well. Considering. At least they didn’t scream or anything. I think that maybe we should wait a while to tell them we are engaged. Let them get to know you a little. I’m sure that they will love you just like I do. See you in the morning.” She gave him a quick kiss.

In the morning, Mary’s Dad had an early Tee time and was gone by the time the rest of the family sat down to breakfast.

“Well ... Patricia ... tell me a little about yourself,” Martha started. “As was evident last night Mary has left us in the dark about you.”

“Well, there’s not much to tell really. My father is buyer for an electronics firm. He travels a lot on business. My mother is a private secretary for the managing director of a local non-profit corporation. I have and older sister who is a Junior in college. She’s taking a major in English Lit. and a minor in Education. I think she wants to be a college professor or something.”

“Your sister sounds really smart. Did she get a scholarship?”

“No, actually, I did better in school than she did. Oh she’s no dummy; she was just too much into her social life in high school to be a really good student. She is holding a 3.75 so far this year and made the dean's list last year. I think she decided to get serious.”

“You didn’t go to college?”

“No, I wanted to, but my father and I couldn’t agree on what school I should go to. I wouldn’t give in and go to his school and he wouldn’t pay the tuition at the school I wanted. So I took the job that ended up with me living full time like you see me now.”

“He’s going to go to school soon though. Elder Care offers assistance to anyone who wants to go back to school and study nursing.”

“Oh, you plan to study nursing?”

“Yes. That’s my first love. My father said he ‘wouldn’t pay anyone to turn his son into a pantywaist nurse.’ So, I’ll just have to do it on my own.”

“What happens to your job while you’re in school? I mean how will you support yourself?”

“Oh, I’ll take night classes and keep on working at the nursing home. It will take a little longer that way, but Elder Care will promote me as soon as I get my LPN.”

“You plan to go to school and work full time? Very ambitious. Do you really think you will be able to do it?”

“Oh yeah, I’ll have to cut out quite a bit of social life, but I’ve always liked school and done really well in science. I just hope Mary can learn to do without my company when she wants to go to a movie. It shouldn’t be too hard. There are plenty of other girls at work who like to take in movies.”

“Do you go to movies quite a lot?”

“I guess you could say so. At least once a month. We like to make an evening of it on our common day off. We get all dressed up and go to dinner and take in a late showing.”

“Do you ever go on double dates? I know when I was dating, I liked to double. There is safety in numbers.”

“It’s always just the two of us. Unless some of the girls from work go.”

“Mother, I told you that Patrick is heterosexual. We wouldn’t go on double dates.”

“Well, I’m sorry. I have a hard time not thinking of you like another of Mary’s girlfriends. After all, you do make such a lovely looking girl. And then, I’ve never seen you dressed as a man.”

Mary was fuming and started to speak again. Patrick placed his hand on hers, and said. “Dear, it’s all right. She apologized.”

Martha looked at the exchange with a jaundiced eye. “There’s something you’re not telling me. Isn’t there?”

“Well, mother, yes there is,” Mary said looking down. “Patrick and I are getting married.”

“You’re not pregnant, are you?”

“No! We haven’t even had sex.”

“Oh I’m sorry. I ... I’m really sorry. That was un-called for. Please forgive me. Patrick, I, I still have trouble thinking of you as a heterosexual. Somewhere in the back of my mind I keep thinking of you as at least bi-sexual. I have a lot of prejudices. Please help me. Mary it seems inconceivable to me that... well I’m sorry... I wouldn’t think you would be interested in a man who wears dresses.”

“I understand,” Patrick told her, “I didn’t tell Mary about my feelings because I thought like you. I am still surprised that she doesn’t give the ultimatum to give it up or get out.”

“Sweet heart, I’d never do that. Mom, you have to understand; I didn’t start out to fall in love with him. You and Dad taught me to live and let live. That everyone, no matter how different from me, was to be respected as a human being. When he got backed into working as Patricia, it became apparent to me that he needed someone as a friend. I knew that, because some unkind rumors began to circulate. The only way to fight rumors it with firsthand knowledge. I began to get to know him. I felt, because of the way I was raised, I should go the extra mile to know him as a person. Not as some strange guy who wanted money bad enough to become a woman.

“It turned out that he was sensitive, good-natured and a very likable person. I have to admit that I found it interesting that a guy, who in every other way was just another guy, could make such a convincing woman. I pressed him for details about what his childhood was like and if he had done such a thing before. He was very straight forward with me and admitted to some childhood activity. The way he told me made me curious about just how much he might be into it. So I teased him to try dressing up when he wasn’t at work. It turned out to be fun for both of us.

“We became fast friends. We went to movies and dinner together. We went shopping and even spent days at the beach. Then when my old roommate bugged out on me with short notice. Patrick came to my rescue and moved in. I would have had to give up my apartment if he hadn’t agreed to move in.

“After that, we both reluctantly realized that our feelings for each other were more than that of casual friends. Once we admitted that to each other, we took a period of strict platonic relationship while we both thought it over. We even gave up our dinner and movies for about three months.

“When we resumed them, we both knew that we were in love. And just last month, we decided to get married. It was then I knew that you and Dad needed to meet him. If you give him a chance, I’m sure that you’ll love him as much as I do.”

“Patrick, do you really, really love my daughter?”

“Yes. I most assuredly do. I can’t conceive of the future without her in it.”

“If she were to ask you to quit and get a job where you could dress as a man, and never put on a dress again ... would you do it?”

“Mother!”

“I would certainly try,” Patrick said ignoring the interruption.

“Mother, didn’t I make myself clear. Patrick, just as he is, is the person I fell in love with. I want him just as he is.”

“Yes, dear,” Martha said. “But that means, you are sacrificing for him. I know you. You mean what you say. But, and forgive me Patrick, I mean no offense. But I don’t know him. I want to be assured that you are the most important thing in his life.”

“Sweetheart. She’s just being your mother. Let her look out for your interests for just a little while longer. I don’t blame her. She just wants to make sure you’re not making a mistake with me.”

“Oh all right, if you’re not offended, I guess I shouldn’t be either. I’m sorry Mom. But, please, know that we are in love and neither of us will ever do anything to hurt the other.”

“OK dear, I’ll have to take your word for it. I’m not sure your father will be so easy to convince. I’ll try to run interference for you, but I’ll have to go slow. It will go better if your father has a chance to know Patricia for a while. Be careful not to spring this on him this visit. Since there is no rush to get married, humor me. Wait a while to get married.”

“We will, we plan to wait a year at least, maybe even two. It would be nice if Patrick were an LPN before we get married. That way we could afford to buy a house.”

The rest of the holiday was uneventful. Mary’s Dad seemed to accept Patricia as a person. Though, he did not warm up to him as much as he might have. They did make plans for Fred and Martha to take their vacation at a beach where Mary could come down on her days off for a visit.

The following week, Patrick called his mother at work and invited her and his sister to have lunch with Mary and him on their common day off.

“Hi mom. Is Julie home over the summer?”

“Yes she is. She has a job working at Olds and King’s.”

“What time does she get lunch?”

“Oh I think about 1:00. Why?”

“Well, I thought I’d like to meet the two of you for lunch tomorrow.”

“Well I’ll ask her when she we gets home today.”

“Better yet, why don’t you have her call me?”

“OK, I have to run Mr. Johnson’s 10:00 is here. Talk to you later.”

“Bye, mom.”

The phone rang about 6:45. Patrick answered it.

“Hi Sis,” Julie’s voice said cheerily.

“Hi Julie, I take it dad isn’t around.”

“It’s Tuesday, where would expect him to be?”

“Thinking about a 300 game on his way to the bowling alley.”

“Bingo. Mom said you wanted me to call you. What’s up?”

“Well, I was hoping to talk you and mom into having lunch with me tomorrow.”

“Well I guess I can. I usually have lunch with Margie. I’ll just tell her that I have a family obligation.”

“Margie can come if she wants to. I have an announcement I want to make. I think she would be interested.”

“I heard that you moved in with a roommate, a girl.”

“Yep, that’s right. A friend from work.”

“So she knows all about your, ah hobby?”

“Long before she asked me to share the rent.”

“So how often are you engaging in your hobby when you’re not working?”

“All the time.”

“All the time? Like, you never wear pants?”

“Not unless they zip up the side or back.”

“Does mom know that?”

“Not really. I mean, I think she refuses to think about it. That’s why I wanted to talk to you. I really want her at lunch, but I wanted her to be prepared for that. So… I was hoping that you could grease the ways for me. Tell her that it is a very important lunch. I need to tell you guys about a very important decision I’ve made.”

“Oh? What kind of decision?”

“Uh-huh, you don’t get it that easy. I want mom to be there when I tell. Believe me you’ll be surprised.”

“How could you. You tell me that you have news and then make me wait until tomorrow.”

“Patience Sis. You’ll just have to wait. I’ll only tell you that it’s good news. See you tomorrow.”

Patricia and Mary dressed in smart daytime dresses and left in time to be waiting at the restaurant at 12:45. Julie and Mrs. Jackson started out to meet them at 12:30.

“What do you suppose Patrick’s ‘good news’ could be?”

“Well when I talked to him on the phone he would only say that it concerned a decision he had made. But I think that it probably isn’t ‘Patrick’s’ good news. I rather think it’s ‘Patricia’s’ good news.”

“I’m hoping that the decision he wants to tell us, is that he’s decided to give up the habit of being Patricia.”

“Well, mother, I don’t think that will be the case. He specifically asked me to prepare you for the idea that you would be lunching with Patricia.”

“Well, I can’t say I’m surprised. Taking a job where he had to dress up for the job doesn’t leave much to doubt about his intentions in the matter. You know I really don’t mind, it’s just that I can’t bear to have the division between him and his father. I want desperately for them to patch it up. I just can’t see your father softening any. If Patrick doesn’t make the effort, they will never be on speaking terms again.”

“I know mother. In spite of the obvious differences between them, they are just too much alike. Both of them just can’t stand to have anyone else make their decisions for them. Even if it only appears that way, they can’t stand it.”

They pulled up in front of the restaurant and found a place to park.

“Julie, I’m as nervous as a cat. I just hope I don’t see anyone I know. I’d die if anyone recognized Patrick.”

“Mother, honestly. If that was going to happen, it already would have. Do you have any idea when Patrick first started going out dressed as a girl? It has to be eight or nine years. I can tell you from personal experience that even if you do meet someone you know, they won’t recognize Patrick.”

“Oh! There he is. Who is that with him?”

“I don’t know. Maybe we ought to be careful not to let on he’s not really a girl. Just in case she doesn’t know.”

Patrick looked up as Julie and his mother approached. Suddenly, he was nervous. His mom had seen him many times in a dress. But she had never seen him anywhere except at home. It was almost like being caught. He started to get up, but stopped himself. Women don’t stand when other women join them. Instead, he waved at them.

“Mother, Julie I’m so glad you could come. Please sit down.”

“Patricia, you look great,” Julie told him.

“Thank you, so do you. Mother, Julie, I’d like you to meet Mary Cavanaugh. Mary, I’d like you to meet my Mother Gwen Jackson and my sister Julie.”

“Nice to meet you Mrs. Jackson, Julie.”

“Nice to meet you Mary, please call me Gwen.”

“Yes, nice to meet you Mary,” Julie agreed.

“It certainly is easy to tell these two are related. Why they could almost be twins if it weren’t for Julie’s hair being blond.”

“You know, you’re right. I never really noticed that until just now.”

Just then Margie showed up. “Well, this looks like a cozy group.” Mrs. Jackson nearly fainted.

“Hi Margie. Patricia just introduced us to Mary Cavanaugh. Mary this is my friend Margie. Margie, this is Patricia’s friend Mary.”

“Well nice to meet you Margie.”

“Nice to meet you Mary.”

Mrs. Jackson looked at Julie with fear in her eyes. Julie looked at her and said, “It’s OK mother. You remember Margie from high school she used to come over and help me watch Patricia? While you were at work during the summer.”

“Oh yes Margie. I didn’t know that you used to ‘help’ Julie watch Patricia.”

“Oh yes, I had a hand in teaching Patricia to be the lady you see today. She admired my make-up so I taught her how I did it. But Patricia, let’s get right to it. I was given to understand that we were here because you had some sort of surprise for us.

“Don’t keep us in suspense. What’s the big news?”

“Well Margie, I think you’re more anxious than anyone. Mom and Julie were willing to let me get to it in my own time. You, however, are about to die of curiosity.”

“I will consider myself properly chastised. But I still want to hear the news.”

“The news will come. The real purpose of this lunch was to introduce everyone to Mary. Mary is one of the CNA’s at work. For the past fifteen months as mom and Julie know, she and I have been sharing a two bedroom apartment. She is, without a doubt, my best friend.”

“Oh, Patricia, I thought I was your best friend. You told me I was when you were twelve. I’m hurt,” Margie pouted playfully.

Patrick laughed. “So I did. As I remember it was the Friday before you left for college. You should know, I felt deserted. No small wonder that I befriended the first woman who treated me decently.”

“Oh. I didn’t know that I got you on the rebound,” Mary teased.

“Got you on the rebound? Something’s afoot here,” Margie observed.

“Indeed there is. I wanted all of you here because the three of you have been the most important women in my life. I wanted all of you the meet the very most important woman in my life. The one I will spend the rest of my life with. Mary and I are engaged.”

“Mary, you seem totally at ease with Patricia,” Mom observed.

Mary hugged Patricia and said, “Very at ease.”

“Which one will wear the wedding dress,” Margie asked blatantly.

“Patricia will,” Mary smiled.

“Oh dear. I was thinking this might be the news that would patch things up with your father,” Mom said. “But if you’re going to be the one in the wedding dress, he won’t come to the wedding. You know he still doesn’t know about ‘Patricia’.”

“We always tried to keep him in the dark about it. But I think we need to tell him now. As much as I want him at the wedding, it’s only fair that he be warned about what I’ll be wearing. If we don’t the very least we can expect is that he will walk out. He may, however, make a big stink and embarrass everyone involved. At any rate, we’re planning our wedding for a year from this August. So we have over a year to get him ready.”

“Mary, what does you family think about Patricia wearing the wedding dress.”

“Well, we haven’t exactly told them yet. I took Patricia home over Fourth of July. My parents were a little taken back by the whole thing. My dad more than my mom. Mom on the other hand, guessed that there was something between us and we had to tell her about our plans. My father, however, has yet to be told. We wanted him to get used to the Patricia first.”

“Well, I wish there was some way to get George used to Patricia.”

“First, he has to know about Patricia,” Julie observed.

“We could leave some pictures of Patricia for him to find around the house,” Margie suggested.

“That’s a great idea. But not just some snapshots. How about if we go to someplace like “Glamour Shots” and have them do an entire spread?”

“Glamour Shots? What’s that?”

“It’s a photo shop that specializes in model quality photos for average people. My cousin had a spread done there for her college graduation. The pictures are incredible.”

“I have a friend that went there. If George could see how good Patricia can look, maybe he’ll be more receptive to him in a dress. I think the thing that will freak him out the most is that Patricia might look comical,” his mother thought out loud.

It was decided. Patricia and Mary stopped at Glamour shots and made an appointment for next week. Both he and Mary made appointments. Some would be with Patricia alone, some with Mary alone and some with Patricia and Mary. On the way home Mary asked. “Was Margie the bully who got you into dresses?”

“Well, actually no. I told you that story when I didn’t know you very well. I was afraid to tell you the truth. We all have the little things in our past that we don’t share with just anyone. Now that we are engaged, I owe you the truth. My little thing is dressing up. I actually started wearing dresses when I was eight. It became an obsession with me. By the time I was 10, my mother had to give me my sister's old clothes to keep me out of her things. Margie was Julie’s best friend. She told Margie about it and the two of them actually became my feminine mentors. They taught me all the things girls learn just being girls.

“They even encouraged me to go out and pass as girl. By the time I was in the fifth grade, I was an old hand at making people believe I was a girl. I did try to not have any face to face contact until just a few years ago. That was when I quit getting hand-me-downs from Julie and Margie and I had to buy my own clothes. After a couple of times buying clothes while just hoping they would fit, I put on my best dress and just acted like I belonged there and tried on before I bought.”

They both showed up early for their photo session and Patricia went first. They opted for the full makeover. The make-up artist was very good. Patricia looked better than usual. The full package included 24 shots. Patricia saved eight shots to share with Mary. Mary saved eight of her shots to share with Patricia. In all, they had 16 shots alone for each and 16 shared shots. When all was said and done, they had 36 poses enlarged.

Then came the strategy. They kept one of each to have around their place. They sent one of Mary to Mary’s parents. Under a separate cover, they sent another of Mary and Patricia to Mary’s mother. They gave one each to Julie and the rest to Patricia’s mother.

Mom began by leaving a picture of Mary out for George to find. He picked it up and looked at it quizzically. “Gwen, who is this girl?”

“Oh that’s Patrick’s girlfriend, Mary. I guess they’re quite serious. I met her last month when I had lunch with them. She seems quite nice.”

“Had lunch with them?”

“Yes, Patrick invited Julie and me to lunch so he could introduce us.”

“When do I get to meet her?”

“Well you haven’t so much as called him since he went against your wishes and became a CNA. I guess he’s afraid you won’t approve of her anymore then you do him.”

“That’s ridiculous. Why would I disapprove of her? And I don’t disapprove of him, just his being a ‘CNA.’ I’m afraid it will sissify him. I can’t even tell the guys at work what my own son does for a living. Only some kind of limp-wristed twit would be a ‘CNA.’ I can’t accept my son like that.”

“Is that what you’re afraid of? You think that Patrick must be gay, or he wouldn’t take that kind of job? Well, I’d say your fears are unfounded, considering he’s got such a good looking girlfriend. I can tell she’s deeply in love with him. All you need to do is look in her eyes. But then it’s no wonder that he openly loves her. She approves of him. She knows all about him and loves him. Not in spite of anything about him, but because of it.

“George, did you ever stop to think that it’s easy to be the kind of man that always does only what’s expected of a man. What takes courage is to be a man who does what his heart leads him to do, regardless of whether it’s expected of a man or not. It takes the most courage to do the things that are not expected of a man. If a man does that, then he is a man indeed.”

“What? What are you saying? That I’m the wimp, because I’m concerned about what other people think of me? I have a reputation to maintain.”

“Yeah? Well that and a dollar will get you a cup of coffee at the McDonalds. You think more of your precious reputation then you do of your own son.”

“I’ll be glad to forgive and forget if he’d just get a real job. One I could tell the guys at work about.”

“Those ‘good old’ boys’ down at the office couldn’t come up with an ounce of ‘Macho’ between them. They are all a bunch of male chauvinist pigs. None of them has any respect for women and I doubt if they have any real self-respect either.”

“Gwen, I’ve never heard you talk this way. What’s gotten into you?”

“My son, who has the courage to stand up and be his own man, has good job where he is respected by his coworkers and his superiors alike, has a beautiful and intelligent girl friend and he can’t even bring her home to introduce her. I have to sneak off to meet her at a lunch. Then I’m afraid to even tell you. I have to wait and leave her picture around before I can even talk to you about it.

“All because you’re worried that he appears to be gay or something. Well he’s not. What would you do if he was? Tell everyone at work he died?”

“Well, no. It’s just I don’t know if he’s gay. If he was, I could just learn to accept it. I could come to terms with it. But with him taking some pantywaist job. If he wanted to be in medicine, why couldn’t he have been a doctor? That’s good manly job. But no he wants to be a nurse. What kind of job is that for a man?”

“What? A man can’t be loving and nurturing? He has to be the one in charge? He can’t take a supportive role? Hard is manly. Soft is not. Well I’ll have you know that a couple of centuries ago, noble men, kings, duke, counts, earls and the rest wore lace and tights as well as powdered wigs. Even pirates wore pierced ear rings and lace. Are you going to tell me they were all gay? I think not. If your son wore lace underwear, it wouldn’t make him any less a man. If he preferred women’s perfume to men’s cologne, that wouldn’t make him any less a man. No matter what he chooses to do, so long as it’s his choice, he a man.

“‘Above all else, to thine own self, be true. Then it follows as the night does the day, thou canst be false to no man.’ Shakespeare. A wiser saying you’ll never hear.”

“Well you keep talking about me. What would you do if he did something really embarrassing to you? What would you do? Suppose he was to wear his sister's clothes in public? What would do?”

“OK, you’ve got me there. I would be concerned that I might have to face the neighbors and that I might be embarrassed. But, and this is a big but, if he really looked like a girl, I don’t think anyone would notice. In that case, I’d learn to live with it. Regardless, I’d love him and he’d be welcome where ever I was. Just as he is now.”

“Yeah sure. It’s easy for you to say. But for me it’s not a ‘suppose.’ It’s for real. He is doing something that I find embarrassing. A nurse! If he wanted to really embarrass me, why didn’t he become a hairdresser or an interior decorator?”

“Dear, I’m sure he didn’t make his decision based on what would embarrass you. He made it on what would fulfill him. Why can’t you just accept him as he is? Must you recreate him in your own image?”

“No, he doesn’t need to be in my image. But in some manly image. Nurse, the word congers up the epitome of femininity. Do you want your son to be Florence Nightingale?”

“What I want is for my son to be happy. Patrick is happy in his job, happy with himself and really happy with his girlfriend. If he needs to be a CNA, a nurse, an interior decorator or even hairdresser, it’s fine with me. It so happens he is a CNA. It doesn’t embarrass me; all the people at work know he’s a CNA. Not one of them raised their eyebrows or looked sideways at me when I told them. Not even the men.”

“Look can we just drop this. If I find out he’s gay, I’ll deal with it.”

“Well deal with him being a CNA.”

“What else will I have to deal with?” he said walking out of the room.

A few weeks later, she left out a picture of Patricia. It was two days before George asked, “When did Julie dye her hair brown? And why?”

“Julie? I don’t think she ever dyed her hair brown why do you ask?”

“That picture of Julie in the dining room. She’s got brown hair.”

“What picture of Julie in the dining room. There’s no picture of Julie in there.”

“Yes there is,” he said stomping off. He returned carrying the picture of Patricia. “Here. This picture of Julie,” he said shoving it at her.

“Oh that picture. It does look like Julie doesn’t it?”

“What do you mean, ‘It does look like Julie.’ It is Julie. Now, when did she dye her hair brown?”

“Oh, Dear that’s not Julie. It’s Patrick.”

“Patrick? He looks more like Patricia in this picture.”

“Yes he does. You asked last time we talked about him what else would you have to deal with. Well, this is what you have to deal with. He makes a very good looking woman. This is what I’ve dealt with for the last 10 years. Now it’s your turn.”

“Ten years?”

“Yes, I couldn’t convince him he should quit wearing his sister's clothes. So I dealt with it the only way I could. I gave him his sister's hand-me-downs and made sure that you never found out. He was a sensitive boy and I knew you would react like this. I didn’t want you to crush his spirit.”

“You’ve known about this for ten years and kept it from me. How often did he dress up?

“Almost every day. That is except for the weekends you were home.”

“What about Julie. Does she know?”

“Yes. At my request she also didn’t tell you. I think she would have if I hadn’t given him her old clothes.”

“You should have told me. I would have made him stop.”

“That would have been the worst thing you could have done. The second time I caught him in his sisters clothes, I realized that we were dealing with a pattern. I went to the library. I found out that about 4% or maybe more of all men dress up in women’s clothes. They are called transvestites or cross-dressers. There is not a ‘cure.’ As a matter of fact, the American Psychiatric Society doesn’t even class it as mental illness any more. Merely as a phenomenon. Most case studies show the problem most cross-dressers suffer from is guilt, brought on by disapproving families. This leads many of them to depression, alcoholism and even attempted suicide. Some of them succeed. That’s why I decided to accept it and why I protected him from you. I knew your method of operation. Guilt is your biggest weapon when dealing with other people. I’d rather have a cross-dressing son, then a dead one.”

“Well, my worst fears are come true. My son is a queer.”

“No he isn’t.”

“Oh yes he is. Look at him.”

“I also learned that of all the men who cross-dress, only about 3% of them are homosexual. That compares to about 4% of all men. Of homosexuals, only about 4% of them cross-dress. So you see, the fact that he cross-dresses is evidence that he is less likely to be gay.”

George studied the pictures for a while.

“I thought you said that the other picture was his girlfriend. You’re sure this Mary is really a girl?”

“Yes. Mary is really a girl.”

“Are you sure? Patrick looks like a girl. If she is a girl, she’ll drop him like a hot rock when she finds out about this,” he said holding up the picture.

Gwen walked into the dining room. “I don’t think so. Mary knows the Patrick inside. She’s not impressed by outward appearances.” She opened a drawer and took out some other pictures. “Here,” she said. “Look at these,” she said handing him the top ten or so.

“Wa… they are pictures of the two of them. They both look like girls.”

“She is a girl. He just looks like one. So much so, you thought he was his sister. The worst that will happen if someone sees him is that they will accuse you of having another daughter. Which, I guess in a way, you do.”

“Yeah, well she can’t feel romantic about him in that get up.”

“I wouldn’t be too sure if I were you. Look at this one.”

“So, they have moon eyes. That doesn’t mean anything.”

“Well then, what about this one?”

“She’s kissing him! What is she? A lesbo?”

“I wouldn’t want to make rash statements about her sexual orientation. I don’t know her that well. All I know is she loves my son for what he is not in spite of it. And he loves her. And, they want to get married.”

“Get married? Ha! Which one will wear the wedding dress?”

“She says Patrick will.”

“Patrick? Well I guess I won’t be going to the wedding.”

“Patrick was afraid of that. He wants a small affair. Just family and a few friends from work. You will be conspicuous by your absence,” she said coldly.

“Your tone of voice says I should go. I, I just can’t. You can’t just spring this on me and expect me to walk him down the aisle.”

Well, you have until next August to get to that point.” They plan to be married sometime in August.”

“Well I hope no one is holding their breath waiting for me to say I will.”

“No George. As with everything else, Patrick is man enough to accept the consequences of his decision. But I think you owe it to yourself to think about it. We won’t be inviting anyone who doesn’t already know about Patrick. If you don’t go, you’ll be home alone and in the years to come you’ll regret it.”

“Julie is going?”

“Yes, she’ll be the maid of honor.”

“I need time to think.”

August showed up with a vengeance. It was hot, even hotter than usual. They got word that Mary’s parents would be at the motel in the second week. Both Mary and Patricia juggled their days off to get three days in a row, and went to visit them. They took a two bedroom unit in the same motel. After checking in they went to visit Fred and Martha.

“Hi mom and dad. You’re looking good.”

“Well you look pretty good yourself,” Martha told her. “Patricia, it’s nice to see you again.”

“It’s nice to be here.”

“Well, are you two still living together?” asked Fred.

“Dad! Yes, we are living together, but we have separate bedrooms. Just like we do here. Would you like to come and see our room?” Mary said curtly.

“You haven’t invited me to see your apartment since Patricia moved in.”

“Well, on your way home, you can just stop by. Don’t bother to warn us you’re coming. Just drop in.”

“Fred! You don’t believe your daughter? They told us that they weren’t sexually involved.”

“If Patricia is heterosexual, as claimed, it seems to me that wearing women’s clothes and moving in with good looking girl like Mary is a good way to get in a little up-close and personal peeping, as well as being on hand when she’s vulnerable.”

“Oh daddy, you’re so suspicious.”

“Well, in part, I joke. If Patricia weren’t always in a dress, I’d know you were lying. I can as least in part believe you. Seeing him in a dress all the time must be a big turn off for you. So regardless of how he feels you won’t be in the mood. I take solace in that.”

“I wouldn’t feel too good about it dad. I think Patricia is sexy in his blue nightgown.”

“All right you two. Knock it off. All you’ve done since the Fourth of July is banter over this. Fred Mary isn’t going to move out. Patricia isn’t going to move out. And Fred, you’ve raise your daughter. She is an adult. You have to trust her. And if you don’t, it’s too late to do anything about it.”

“Oh all right. Spoil our fun. Martha, you know that if Mary and I don’t have something to go at each other about, we don’t have fun together.”

“That’s all well and good, but you don’t want to give Patricia here the wrong idea. You know yourself that you said after their last visit that to spite Patricia’s stra… ah unusual manner of dressing, he was and I quote ‘your kind of man.’ now didn’t you?”

“Well, all right, you’ve got me there.”

“Dad doesn’t like to be caught with anything good to say about my friends,” Mary told Patricia.

It turned out that Fred was an avid chess player. Patrick had been first seat in his high school chess club. Fred happened to have a chess set along. They spent many an hour over the chess board. Fred was good. He had to spot Patricia two pieces to make it a competitive game. The evening of the third day, they were all out on the deck enjoying the sunset. Mary was sitting between Fred and Patricia.

“Dad, give me the real low down. Do you really like Patricia?” she asked.

“Patricia, I’ll do you the honor of not talking about you as if you’re not here. I’ll answer her imprudent question as if you had asked it instead. In my opinion you’re the most unusual person I’ve ever encountered. However, you have a good heart. I’m glad that if my daughter has a male roommate, it’s someone like you. I’m not talking about the way you dress; I’m talking about your integrity. It’s your moral standard I admire. I hope you’ll consider me your friend the same way you do Mary.”

“Well, dad, I hope he doesn’t feel the same way about you, he feels about me. We’ve decided to get married.”

“Married?”

“You heard me right. Just about a year from now we’ll be Mr. and Mrs. Jackson.”

“Are you sure about that? It looks to me like you’ll be Mrs. and Mrs. Jackson,” Fred said laughing.

“Fred!” Martha said hitting him on the arm.

Patricia was laughing. Only Mary and Martha were disgusted.

“Dad, laugh if you like but I have a favor to ask.”

“What’s that?” asked George wiping his eyes.

“We want a small wedding. Just the immediate family and a few close friends.”

“That’s no big deal. It will keep the costs down.”

“That’s not the favor. Would you mind terribly if you didn’t walk me down the aisle?”

“You want some else to walk you down the aisle?”

“No. I won’t be walking down the aisle. Patricia will.”

“My only daughter gets married and she doesn’t walk down the aisle. Her husband will be the bride.”

“Dad, it will mean a lot to me and to Patricia. You see, I never got to know him as Patrick. If he were to wait for me at the end of the aisle in a Tux, I wouldn’t feel like I was marrying the person I’ve grown to love.” She turned to Patricia and looked lovingly at him. “I know it’s sounds weird. It seems weird to me, but I’m looking forward to seeing Patricia in a beautiful wedding gown. I want to be the one in a tux.”

“You’re right. It does seem weird. But you know I’ve never been able to turn you down on anything you really wanted. So I’ll sit on the groom's side.”

“Patricia’s sister is going to be maid of honor. I’d be really proud if you would be best man.”

“OK, I’ll wait with my daughter and watch her bride come down the aisle.”

“Daddy, I love you,” she said throwing her arms around him.

In the ensuing months, they found a small chapel and a Unitarian minister to perform the ceremony. They arranged for a room to hold the reception dinner and a caterer. They ordered the flowers. They had many visits with Fred and Martha, lunches with Gwen, Julie and even Margie. Margie managed to worm her way into the ceremony as a bride's maid. Mary’s bachelor Uncle Tom was included in her family. Tom had been a change of life baby for her grandmother. He was only 10 years older than Mary. He was the only family Mary’s mother or father had on the West Coast. Tom took the whole idea of a cross-dressed bride in stride. He was a traveling sales man and he territory was San Francisco. He had seen everything along those lines.

Through that year, George was quite. He didn’t argue with Gwen when she brought up the wedding. As a matter of fact, he only participated in such a conversation once.

“What have you got there?” he asked Gwen as she as carrying a box down from the attic.

“My wedding gown. I’m taking it to be cleaned. I want Patrick to wear it when he’s married.”

“He’s still bent on being the bride?”

“Yes, he is.”

“I guess that means we’re the parents of the bride then.”

“Yes, you could say that.”

“How much is the wedding going to cost us?”

“What?”

“The parents of the bride always pay for the wedding.”

“Well so far, I’ve only committed to whatever it takes to clean and alter this dress.”

“Here’s my Visa Card. The outstanding balance is low. Put whatever you can on it and write a check for the rest,” he said laying the card on the by the phone and leaving.

He studiously avoided other conversations about the wedding. In July, he watched as the phone calls came in. He knew the rehearsal date and time. Julie and Gwen picked up Margie for the rehearsal. When Patricia and Mary got to the chapel, they pulled in right behind Margie, Julie and Gwen. As they were walking up to the door, Fred and Martha showed up with Uncle Tom. The got inside to find the minister waiting for them.

The minister went over the details Mary and her dad would wait with him at the altar and Margie would come down the aisle first, followed by Julie and then Patricia. As Patricia waited her turn to go down the aisle, there was a movement in the shadows near the door. George walked up and hooked her arm on his. “I guess this is where the father of the bride comes in,” he said.

Patricia cried at the rehearsal more than at the wedding.

-- finis --