Chapter 33

Litara was squeezing my hand when I opened my eyes in the ambulance. "Hold on Venus. Hold on. We're almost there! Hold on! She got permission to phone Mr Pitt and I heard arrangements being made to divert the ambulance, but that is the last I heard until I woke in a hospital bed.

I struggled to raise my head and a nurse appeared holding a glass of water for me to sip. "Is it cancer? Am I dying?"

"No, you aren't dying but you will have to wait for the doctor to explain. Your sister is here though and she may know more. Litara leant in to hug me at that moment…

"You silly cow, fancy scaring me like that!" The words were angry but the relief on her face said it all. All she knew was that a blocked blood supply had caused my pain and that although it had been dangerous the danger was past.

"What are you doing here at all? Alistair Dougan gave me a train ticket to Cardiff and I was going straight from the airport onto the train!"

"Wouldn't you like to know?" Litara pouted. "I've been here all day worried stiff about you so now you can wait until tomorrow for my news! Until then tell me all about your adventures…"

I did try and I know she laughed about Concorde but before many minutes I had to call a halt, suggesting I needed sleep and she needed to get back to work so she left with a promise to be in next day.

I next woke with the arrival of Mr Pitt. The nurse said he would explain and explain he did calling after his regular hours just to do it.

"You had a very close call Venus and gave the surgeon quite an education."

"You didn't operate?"

"I'm good but not that good, although I did assist! You got the best in the best in London and she found amongst other things you had an ovarian torsion ready to create all sorts of ructions in your body!"

"Ovarian? Does that mean I have ovaries?"

" An ovary yes! It is immature but appears a functional ovary and you also have a uterus although together they've developed twisted like a pretzel and the blood supply to your ovary has never been good. Add to that some recent movement twisted the ovarian artery cutting off the remaining blood supply and creating in the process an aneurysm that looked ready to burst. You were one very lucky girl to be where you were when that happened or you would have at best lost your ovary and at worst died."

"Where does that leave me then? It sounds as though the two of you had fun in the operating theatre but what have I got left and what's gone?"

"Your penis hasn't gone if that is what you are wondering. What was done was similar to a Caesarean section and that is the type of scar you will see. Your uterus and ovary have been secured in a better position to develop normally, with internal stitches that will dissolve, rather like planting out potted flowers into the garden.

While doing that we did find some other variations in your body, in particular you don't have the prostate of a male but rather what appear to be female Skene's glands. To be positive you won't ever get prostate cancer and it tends to confirm too that in glandular terms your female development has been stronger than the male. Your penis is intact but to be realistic, if the uterus develops normally and it is what you wish, I will recommend we use the skin to construct a vagina for you."

"To get down to practicalities Venus, get a good night's sleep after I leave because I want you out of bed tomorrow morning. We'll have the dressing off and catheter out tomorrow and all being well you might be able to go home the day after."

"Charles? I never realised you had such a sense of humour! I'm at death's door, you cut me in half then pat me on the head and tell me to go home - I bet you don't treat other women who've had a caesarean like that!!"

"Venus you just lost a bet! You lot are stronger than frail males like me so that's the way it's done. Now get to sleep and I'll see you tomorrow."

Why hospitals pretend the middle of the night is next day I'm not certain but next day I was up breakfasted and walking unfettered by noon with even my sitting time interrupted by ankle exercises to reduce the chance of blood clots. A good-sized if bland lunch followed and then Mr Pitt breezed through, gave me a brief inspection and pronounced me ready to leave next day presuming I'd had a bowel movement by then.

Litara arrived next with her laptop only to refuse to share her news with me once she heard I could leave next day. Well if she was going to act like that there was no way I'd share my news about the interview let alone about Jean-Luc so instead we talked about Grandma Tina and Bill who were now openly living in sin which meant that instead of me at 18 being the one who was being tut-tutted it was my 75 year old grandmother who was kicking up her heels which of course, for the thousandth time, led me to pump Litara about her love-life but as usual I got nowhere so…

"Do you think either of us will have children?" I asked and Litara just wrapped me in her arms and gently rocked me which is what we all really want rather than talk at the big moments in our lives.

Peering into the toilet bowl next morning I couldn't deny having fulfilled Mr Pitt's leaving requirements but I was stuck for something to wear. My baggage was missing and I'd been cut out of the capri pants I'd been wearing when rushed into hospital. Luckily I had a sister looking out for me who had not only tracked down my missing bag but brought in a dress which while not my style, resembling as it did a tent, would keep me warm in the English autumn without pressure on my scar or revealing odd dangly bits which I couldn't tuck.

OMG I just said 'my style' when I hadn't been aware I had a style. I knew there were women and even some men whose whole essence revolves around clothes but I'd been barely aware of making any choices beyond practical requirements. "Where's my makeup?"

"Calm down little sister. Here's your handbag and we are only going to the flat you visited before for a couple of days convalescence not to the Paris fashion shows!"

My warm feelings of gratitude to Litara lasted right through the drive to the flat and into the evening until she put on the huge plasma screen television and told me to sit down because I needed to see something. It seemed my news about the interview was no news to Litara because she'd already seen it!

"The company making 'Bilbao Reborn' only filmed your interview because my company paid them to as cost effective footage for our programme on your journey. However having seen the results they are willing to pay rather well to incorporate it into their own programme which will be aired this Christmas."

With that Litara slipped in the DVD and I lived through the most confusing 5 minutes of my life…