I'm the Christmas Nut I suppose and used to rival Chevy Chase's "Christmas Vacation" when it comes to decorating my house.
I had my family, a wife, two daughters and a son. I was a pillar in the church, worked one job for years, and never had more than a speeding ticket. All that time, I had perhaps one friend. My family was my life and I poured everything I had into them. That all ended in 2004.
It is now 2013 and yesterday was the 9th anniversary. Though the pain of the loss of everything I cared for is a thinly healed scar, I am in a much better place now, though the family will never know.
I know and love God, and I have dozens of friends for the first time in my life. I love who I am though the pain of getting here was too severe, with no way to go back, I am content. Some say I am quite cute but no one hits me on the butt. :(
Thank every one of you whether you know me or not. Almost all the things that I value most are in my life, so what more can I ask for. I'm a woman, a parent, an author, a retired electrician, a writer, and a Mormon. :)
I know the church has hurt some of you badly, and I work with a small group of people to quietly prove ourselves, not by picketing on the streets with signs and complaining but by just being who we are, being faithful to our covenants, and waiting on Heavenly Father to make a way for us. I don't make the rules in the church. I just do my best to obey them.
If you have been paying attention to the news things have been happening. I do not know the ultimate conclusion, but I have faith that in due time God's will will prevail.
Merry Christmas everyone.
Gwendolyn
Comments
I am glad to hear that things
I am glad to hear that things are coming around for you . I sincerely hope things continue to improve. since our works were related (retired lineman here) All I can offer is if we ever are allowed to meet I promise to pat you on the tushy, just for luck...Hope your Christmas is a blessed one and the coming year also
omg
You make it sound as if your family died in some tragic accident involvong 25000 christmass lights and toxic fumes from a chemical shitter, lol.
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Oh, the usual...
I knew when I was 4 years old, but was so badly abused I forgot until I was in my late 30's, but by then I had a devoted wife and three children, a mortgage and a job I hated. As most of us do, I soldiered on for years, but one day got found out, thrown out, disowned, shunned, and shat upon.
The recovery was slow and took years. Read what I have written. I haven't seen them since 2004, cept for my son when he wants to be ugly and sanctimonious.
Life has gradually gotten better and then I was shocked when the Mormons embraced me. Oh, not fully but better than all the others and they don't have a bunch of humanistic agendas.
Yep, life is pretty good and I am thankful.
Gwendolyn
PS, if that picture is really you ... bitch :)
im so sorry
Im so sorry to hear that, coincidently your story is so familiar. Ive know I was differentz and a girl from a young age but these thoughts where supressed after my mother entered into an abusive relationship bringing me with her. When I was 9 we escaped with our lives but I fell in with a bad crowd and did some truly atrocious things, when I was 12 I got arrested, I was so young that I didnt get into much trouble but they made me take youth counseling and move in with my father. My feelings resurfaced and my father was amazingly supportive and encouraged(after a heated discussion with my step mother where she ripped him a new one for calling me a fag), ive been on hormones since 13 when I started puberty. But your story made me realize how I could have turned out and how lucky I truly am . And yes that is me, I actualy took that picture today( fyi). And I am not a dog!, lol
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btw
BTW the movie was called ' national lampoons christmas vacation' and chevy chase plays the main character.
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Gwendolyn dear....
Merry Christmas sweetie! And here's a SWAT!!!!! For your lovely derriere! Loving Hugs Talia
You are getting a good start
Just know for sure that you are getting a better start than lots of us, and to be sure you are entering a world that is more accepting of you than it was of us.
Please take that as a gift from my generation as I have taken what those in front of me have done, gratefully and with meekness.
Please do well in school, be wise and do not reveal your past. My strategy is to say that I am PAIS (Look it up) You can not reveal to ignorant savages that you were once genetically male. They will kill you. By the way, as long as you are at it, get a Karyotype test and see if your genetics have any abnormalities.
Best.
Gwendolyn
I will
I am doing well in school, lol. But I dont beleive in keeping secrets, witholding information yes, but if u ask " where u ever a strapping yound lad" I would say yes, lol. And i have had a karyotype test, I am perfectly normal... for a male.
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Merry Christmas Gwen.
Hope you have many more happy Christmases, you deserve them. As to the family well they are the losers Gwen but yes you are right, there is nought so hurtful as the ungrateful child. Will Skype you soon.
Hugs and merry Christmas.
Bevs.
I wish you a merry Christmas
I wish you a merry Christmas in return and hope that someone gives you a celebratory swat upon your derriere!
Xx
Amy