So I've finally come to the decision. I don't need my family anymore. So I've disowned them. I'm tired of caring what they thing. I'm tired of hurting. To follow a story recently on the site, Masks, I've determined my male self, Dan, is a mask lined with thorns. a Mask that is so heavy that if I let it sit on me. It hurts so much eventually I will be no more.

Yesterday I saw I had two messages from my former family on my phone. I listened to my former sister's first. I regret I ever did it. it started out simple enough stating how much she missed me. wanted to catch up. Ect. Then it turned around and she stated how I should stop "trying to be a girl" and "Be a man" "man up" I never finished it. I deleted both messages and just broke down crying. Working my way to my room I grabbed my bear sat down at my computer and typed up an email to my therapist.

Any interaction I have with my former family will only end in pain and tears, and I'm tired of it. I'm not Dan, Dan is not me. I'm not a boy. I'm a girl. A girl named Dani, and Dani is here to stay. Others have gone on with out their families. I will too. I'm stronger than them. And that mask isn't mine. Not anymore.

My Therapist is an absolute doll to help me through this though. WHen I emailed her, she emails me directly back. She truely cares about my well being and I'm really grateful for that. I'm willing to go the extra mile as it were, to see her for our sessions, or to email her when I need encouragement.

So my former family lost out on learning about who I am. thats their problem. not mine.

Dani