A Lonely Christmas

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A Lonely Christmas

by Wren Phoenix

 
 
[Admin Note]: In light of Wren's passing away just after Christmas, it is only fitting I give her Christmas entry A Lonely Christmas one last light at the top of our front page for all to see. The 2012 One Winter's Eve Contest is Dedicated to Wren Erindae Phoenix. May she find the peace and happiness in her next life that she struggled so hard to obtain here. I wish for God to grant that to her.

Originally posted on 2012-11-11 15:54:53 -0700, I am reposting this in Memoriam for her. ~Sephrena

 


 
The falling snow was beautiful in the light of the streetlights. Downtown had a charming holiday feel that just made you want to break into a rendition of “White Christmas” or “Silver Bells”. Shoppers stopped to look into the decorated windows, or exchange greetings with friends. It was a pleasant Christmas Eve in Finson.

Up above the Hardware store in an upstairs apartment, Jenny sat and listened to Christmas carols. She loved this apartment, even as old and beat up as the house was. The front room was her favorite, as stark as it was. Three of the walls were a bright shade of white, and the fourth wall was paneled in old grey barn wood. Along with the brown carpeting, the room had a relaxing feel for Jenny.

The only furniture she had was a green bean bag chair, her small television/radio and an end table with a small lamp. She watched from the large window sill as people and cars made their way through the falling snow which was just beginning to accumulate.

I miss them, she thought as she pulled her pale pink robe tighter around her. It was hard being 19 and on your own. She had a job at the Hardware store, assembling snow-blowers, stocking the floor, etcetera. It wasn’t much, but she had a warm place to stay and food to eat. It wasn’t enough, of course. She needed the contact with others, but once she came out, almost everyone but her boss had decided to keep their distance.

Jerry had never been a popular person, but this...this was hard. She had to save every spare penny she could, in order to move out to California, where she had heard it was a lot easier to be trans.

She had been surprised at the way everyone had changed. Jerry had listened carefully to everyone talk about how tolerant they were, and how they could accept “differences” in their friends and co-workers. It was shocking how fast all of that talk had proved to be nothing more than that, just talk.

Mom had gone completely nuclear. She couldn’t get Jerry out of the house fast enough. He had grabbed a few things, including his mattress, but had left some things behind, like his books and bookshelves.

His father had always taught Jerry that tolerance was a virtue, but when it came to actual tolerance, there was none. The double betrayal from his parents hurt terribly. Dad had dropped him off in front of the homeless shelter, without saying a word.

Jerry’s boss had been the only one to accept her change, and the only one to keep her from hitting bottom. He had the old apartment upstairs, and even though a ball rolled through the apartment could never roll straight, Jenny had accepted it immediately.

That was two months ago, and she’d heard nothing from them. She had no idea if they were even alive. She had hoped that time would change things, but apparently not.

The DJ happily announced that it was midnight, so he wished everyone a Merry Christmas, and followed that with Nat King Cole and “The Christmas Song”. Jenny shed a few tears and turned off the radio.

“Merry Christmas, Mom and Dad.” She said quietly, and went to bed.



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