Hazrin, born Azrina, was born a boy and was genetically a boy. Then his mother registered him as a baby girl. When he was 2, his mother sent him away to live with his aunt, deep inside the vineyards of France. Without knowing anything, he lived almost twenty years of his life as a girl. Now he has returned home, to his home country, and decided to care for his little brother and sisters, as a man. Can he untrain himself of all feminine gestures and become a real man? Enter Iskandar, the nephew of one of the wealthiest tycoons in Southeast Asia. He had a plan, of becoming independent from his uncle, but that would cause him to betray the only one he holds dear. Will he sacrifice all for Azrina's love? Or will he sacrifice Azrina instead? Then comes Max, a german man from an impoverished noble household. For the past fifteen years, Rina Sofiana de Havensall, has always been in his mind. Now that he had fulfilled his promise, he came to find Rina, to ask her to honour her part of the promise. Part 2 By Shinieris |
"Are you sure about this, sis?" the woman with wavy brown locks said to a tired-looking, black-haired woman.
"Yes, I am sure. His men are very close to finding us. I won't be able to protect her anymore," the dark-haired woman said as she looked at her two year old daughter playing with building blocks.
"Are you sure you're protecting her? I fairly believe you're protecting yourself," the brown-haired woman asked suspiciously
"Please, little sister. Zul must not find her. I beg you this, for the first time in my life," the dark-haired woman held her sister's hand tightly.
"Are you sure about this, sis?" the woman with wavy brown locks said to a tired-looking, black-haired woman.
"Yes, I am sure. His men are very close to finding us. I won't be able to protect her anymore," the dark-haired woman said as she looked at her two year old daughter playing with building blocks.
"Are you sure you're protecting her? I fairly believe you're protecting yourself," the brown-haired woman asked suspiciously
"Please, little sister. Zul must not find her. I beg you this, for the first time in my life," the dark-haired woman held her sister's hand tightly.
The brown-haired woman placed her palm ontop of her sister's hand. "Sister, have you think this through? Do you really want to send your own daughter away?"
"Son."
"Pardon?"
"She is not my daughter, she is my son," the dark-haired woman burst into tears.
Neither said anything as the brown-haired woman tried to recover from her shock. When she recovered, she said, "I understand now. I will take her back with me to France. I will hide her for you. But know this, sister, she will never come back here, no matter what happens."
"Thank you," the dark-haired woman sobbed, "That will be for the best."
------
Azrina ran a comb through her long dark hair as she took a good look at herself in the mirror. She sighed. Even without trying, she still looked no different from a woman, and judging from the looks she got from drooling males on the street, she knew she looked better than most women here. Then she unceremoniously pulled the wig off her head, and what greeted her was the face of Hazrin, her daytime male persona. Hazrin looked slightly more masculine than Azrina, but if one were to take just a glance, they would see a tomboy instead of a man.
She groaned, even without the long hair, people still mistake her as a woman, or a young girl. She took off her t-shirt, the one she wore to bed, and looked into the mirror at the bulging flesh on her chest. She tested it with her fingers, and gasped when she felt something tingly. She had wondered why she grew breasts, as she wasn't even a girl, but she imagined that it must have been caused by all the conditioning she received as she grew up to be a girl. That, or these girl clothes have cursed me, she thought. Then she took off her panties, a simply white cotton affair, and dove under the shower.
When she came out, she was gloriously naked. Then she caught a reflection in the mirror and cursed. Her body, her face, looked well like a woman's. Even her waist was tight and tiny, and with all the steam, one could mistake her as a woman. If only there was nothing dangling between her legs, nobody would ever think otherwise. She sighed again. She had a long way to go to being a man.
She took a clean towel and dried herself. She was very careful when cleaning her crotch and breasts, as she knew from experience that those places were very sensitive. She had seen pornographic pictures of course, there were plenty in her brother's room, and so she knew what her breasts and the dangling thing on her crotch was for. What she couldn't understand was why her breasts were more developed than her shrivelled up penis, when she wasn't even a woman in the first place. She looked at the bra she had left inside the hamper, 32B written on one small piece of cloth and sighed. Even that was getting tight, she thought as she took the length of bandage she placed on the counter earlier and proceeded to wrap her breasts tightly.
It was torturous. Trying to get her breasts to stay still as she tried her best to wrap the bandage around it was a pain. Then comes the pain from having her breasts squeezed tightly by the unforgiving bandages. A tear of pain dropped from her eyes as she tried to endure the pain. It was at this point every morning that she regretted her decision to cut her long beautiful hair, cared with absolute love from herself and her aunt since she was 12. Regretted never asking to go with her birth mother whenever she came to the vineyards for a visit. Regretted living as a girl til now. Regretted choosing to become a man. And most of all, regretted that she wasn't really born as a girl.
There, she remarked, slipping the end of the second bandage into a fold and cinching it with a bracer. She turned around, feeling security in the way the bandage constricted her movements. In a way, it's no different from the corsets mama used to make me wear, she thought. Then she wrapped her towel around herself in the way girls normally do, covering the chest and showing lots of legs, and got out of the bathroom, to the glowering face of her 17 year old sister, Mira.
"How long does it take you to bathe? You're worse than Nini!" Mira scolded as Rina came out.
"Sorry," Rina allowed.
Mira growled as she stepped in, "If I didn't know better, I would've thought you're a girl". Then Mira shut the door closed with a bang.
Rina shrugged, then went to her room to prepare for work.
------
"How was dinner last night, Is?" the man at the head of the table asked from behind his newspaper. He had the look of an intelligent man, but behind the wide-rimmed grandpa glasses that he wore, one could see a hint of sadness and perhaps regret.
Iskandar was spreading chocolate on his bread when he paused mid-spread regarding his uncle's question. What should he say, he wondered as his mind went back to the night before...
"You look beautiful tonight, Marina," Iskandar said to his companion.
Marina looked up from the menu, "Thank you. You look pretty good yourself," she said as she went back to perusing the menu.
Neither had been to the restaurant before. The meeting was arranged by both Iskandar's uncle and Marina's father. This particular restaurant, while upscale and had received numerous good reviews before, were considered a neutral ground as neither Iskandar's uncle nor Marina's father had any influence here. For both reluctant Iskandar, and distant Marina, this was the perfect place to speak their minds.
They did that right after dessert.
"Look, Marina. I know it is bad of me to say this, since this is our first date and all. But I'm afraid, I must say something before this leads to somehing more," Iskandar said while nursing his orange juice.
Marina stopped spooning the ice cream into her mouth and put the spoon into the half-empty bowl. "What do you mean?"
"We shouldn't be doing this," Iskandar stated.
"Oh that," Marina picked up the spoon and proceeded to indulge in her dessert, a strawberry and vanilla with cherry, crushed nuts and cendol ice-cream. "I totally agree, Mr. Obvious."
"No, I mean," Iskandar stuttered, "We're not meant for each other. You're pretty, you're smart, you're nice-"
"And you're gay?"
"Yes, and - what?"
Marina laughed. Laughed so hard she snorted her ice-cream. When she recovered, she said, "I always case my dates. You're no exception. Imagine that, Mohamad Iskandar, son of the late Dato' Muktamar Zamri, is gay. I wonder how your 'defender-of-faith' parents would feel about it if they're still alive." She laughed again, only with a bit more composure now.
"How?" Iskandar stutted. For some reason, Marina Adawiyah Binti Syed Zaki Mukhtar, three years his junior, made him feel like a pathetic little boy.
"A piece of advice, Iskandar, stay away from your usual haunts. It's not good for your reputation," Marina laughed again, "Oh, but that coffeehouse near KLCC, the one called Towkey? My informants told me they serve good coffee, I may even pay a visit myself."
Iskandar looked furious. "Don't you dare, Marina," he said as his voice lost all traces of uncertainty, "The last time people like you made trouble there, they had to close for a month, and they lost lots of loyal customers."
"You're afraid I would cause trouble to one Eric Wong, former second son of Wong Chai Loong, the underworld king of 'property'?" she grinned.
"If you even flick a finger in their direction, I will make you suffer, Marina," his voice became lower, hinting at violence.
"You and what army, Iskandar? You don't even have any means of striking back at me."
Iskandar stabbed the meatball in his plate with his fork. "There are plenty of ways for a girl to suffer, Marina. Even one as rich and powerful as you. At the end of the day, you're still a little girl."
Marina grinned. "I'm starting to like you, Iskandar. How about a truce?" She held out her hand across the table.
Iskandar caught it and shook her hand. "Truce."
Marina wiped her mouth with her napkin. "Now that we have a truce, I would like to make an exchange."
"What kind of exchange?" Iskandar asked suspiciously.
"Oh, just information on my part. I so happened to hear you making deals to acquire a little bit of capital so you can take over your uncle's company. Now, hold on a minute, before you say something, this information didn't come cheap, so you don't have to worry about other people finding out, much." Marina made a sly grin as she saw Iskandar's face became redder.
"And you want something in exchange for keeping this secret?" Iskandar fumed.
Marina's grin got wider. "Oh no no. I would keep that secret for free. I want to exchange this information with you, and it's cheap."
"What is it?" Iskandar's voice has lost all patience.
"Your uncle has a daughter," she waited for effect, enjoying Iskandar's look of shock, before continuing, "But they have been apart for so long, that he's been looking all over for her. Your uncle, has pledged to retire and pass down everything he owned, every share, every office, even every cars he owned to his daughter, if she could be found. However, to avoid from getting plenty of 'fake daughters', your uncle has been keeping this very hush hush. Now if you are to find this daughter and marry her..."
"I would get the company. No fuss, no mess." Iskandar looked thoughtful.
"Exactly!" Marina clapped like a giddy little girl.
"And what do you want in exchange for this little piece of cheap information?" Iskandar asked as he leaned forward, squinting his eyes.
"Oh, just the chance to do this in public," Marina said before she slapped Iskandar with all her energy. Then she picked her handbag, slung it on her shoulder, and screamed to the confused Iskandar, "You pig!"
Then Marina walked away, leaving behind the still confused Iskandar.
"Is!" Iskandar's uncle yelled.
"Yes?" Iskandar dropped his chocolate toast.
"I asked you how last night went," his uncle said, as he put down the newspaper he was reading.
"Not very well," he replied without looking at his uncle. Since last night, he had wondered about his uncle's lost daughter, and wondered if the only reason his uncle had taken him after his parent's death was to fill the emptiness of being without a child. Even after many years, his uncle still had no other children to this day.
Unexpectedly, his uncle laughed.
"I've heard," his uncle said, as a plate of nasi lemak with anchovy sambal, a common Malaysian breakfast was placed in front of him. He went on to describe the whole affair, except for the hush hush things Iskandar had discussed with Marina to his wife, while allowing a few laughs in between.
Iskandar wondered why his uncle even bothered to ask if he already knew. Under his breath, he muttered, "Damned corporate spies."
------
"Mira, why don't you have breakfast first?" Rina, now in her male persona, said to her sister.
"No time, the school bus is coming," Mira said as she brought her white school shoes to the front door.
"Just a bite, Mira," Rina pleaded.
"I wouldn't even need to rush if the two other people in this house didn't spend a full hour each in the bathroom," she cursed.
"I'm going off too, big sis," Nini said as she grabbed her paperbag containing her lunch box and gave Rina a hug.
"At least take the lunchbox, Mira," Rina said as she grabbed the paperbag from the kitchen counter.
Mira scoffed. "No friggin' way! Do you know how much ridicule I'll get from my classmates when I'm the only one who go to break with a homemade lunch?"
Rina pushed the paperbag at Mira's chest, "Either you bring the lunchbox to school or no spending money for you today."
Mira grudgingly accepted the paperbag and looked at Rina. When the schoolbus honked and Rina still looking at her like an idiot, she said, "Where's my spending money?" She opened her palm.
"It's inside the paperbag! Now hurry, your bus is waiting," she said the last bit to both her sisters.
"Goodbye, big sis," Nini kissed Rina on the cheek before skippinga along.
"Mira..." Rina said.
Mira grudgingly kissed her sister's other cheek before running off, muttering to herself, "All these hallmark moments are making me pissed."
Rina watched her sisters go off to school from the front door. Once sure her sisters were on the bus, she closed the front door and took off her apron. As a matter of habit, she popped a pink coloured vitamin pill onto her palm and swallowed it with a glass of water, something she had been doing since she was 12. It started when she complained of fatigue and muscle pains to her aunt, and her aunt had brought her to the village pharmacy then brought home a mass of pills and capsules. A visit to the doctor caused her aunt to stop giving her each of everything so she was only stuck with the one pink pill she was supposed to take everyday.
After that, she washed all the plates, bowls and glasses, then she went to the back, and went out through the back door. Hazrin never left from the front door.
*It's amazing how much I can accomplish when I don't play games. As always, comments and fedbacks are very appreciated.
Comments
Little Pink Pills
It's easy to guess what's happening to Hazrin now. But even if he figures it out, it sounds like he's going to keep on the same path. It brings up the issue of nature vs. nurture. I happen to think it's always a combination of both and it looks like this story agrees with me.
Thanks and kudos.
- Terry
Little pink pills
Yes, nature vs nurture was an integral theme when I created this serial. Of course there were other elements, but I wasn't expecting people would pick up on it. It feels good to know that my readers do read deep into the texts of my story.
Thank you for your comment, Terry, and keep supporting me.
Thank you
This chapter added clarity that was sadly missing in the first, nationalities religion whats and whys, I had been tempted to comment on the the above unresolved, and I'm glad I waited.
Nationalities
Yea, it's kinda my style to not let everything be known in the first chapter. That's why I can't make oneshots :P
I'm glad you waited though, and thank you for your feedback. Please keep supporting me.
^_^
Bliss Behind A Stalk of Rose Part 2
Is he still taking the pills? Could it be some blend of tea? Has the medicine made it impossible for him to have the body of a male?
May Your Light Forever Shine
Tea
Oh no,nothing special really. It's a standard prescribed drug you can get from any doctor across the developed world, except maybe Pakistan, Saudi Arabia, Iran, Turkey and some other uptight countries. As for what it does, you'll just have to wait until the reveal. Hehehehe
Thanks for supporting me. ^_^
But, But,
My estradiol are aqua! Of course they are just one hormone, not birth control...
Very interesting story; I'm sticking with it! Thanks!
Hugs and Bright Blessings,
Renee
Birth Control
But in Malaysia, it's light pink! :D
Thank you for your comment. Please keep sticking to this story ^_^
this has my interest
I'm sure I'm missing some of the subtle details, like why his mother did this in the first place, but I'm interested so far.