Hi, I'm Rin. When the school I went to went bankrupt, I had to find another school to go to. The only choice left was a school that is so full and crowded, there's hardly any room to breathe. So with only one week left to change schools, I had to do something drastic. I picked the only other choice left, which is an all-girl's school. By the way, I'm a boy. - This is the alternative route from the base story, Traps Are Delicious. But They're Not Edible is Shira's romance route. But They're Not For Cooking is Zara's romance route. Hope you enjoy this story. - Traps Are Delicious But They're Not For Cooking A story of a boy's life in an all-girls school. By Shiina Ai

If you want to read Shahira's route, please go to Traps Are Delicious But They're Not Edible. The first part is the same, the second part starting from "It is a nice, sunny day. " is different.

Have you ever feel like being in such a mess, that you have no idea what to do? Have you thought that, at some point, the problem that you've been putting off has been accumulating until it becomes too big for you to handle? Has said problem been plaguing you all night and day, that you stop thinking about anything but that problem?

Well, that's what happen to me. I must have been so preoccupied with my thoughts that I didn't realize I was...

You know... scratch that. I have absolutely no idea how I end up hanging by the concrete parapet at the end of the corridor of the 3rd floor of the school.

"HELP!" I cry out loud. I repeat it twice more as the strength of my fingers starts to slip.

Just as the strength in my fingers are about to fail, my arms are grabbed by two men, teachers. Slowly, with their middle-age strength, they pull me up, until half of my body is in the safezone. They finally let go of my arm once my feet touch the floor again.

It feels so great to have something under my feet again.

"Huff huff, why would you commit suicide, boy?" one of the teachers, a bespectacled man with a paunch belly ask.

"I wasn't trying to commit suicide. I was busy thinking and then - and then the next thing I realized, I was hanging by my hands on the other side of the parapet."

"Must be a very deep subject then. Do me a favour. Next time you think deeply about something, sit," the other teacher remarks before taking his leave.

"Follow me to my office, boy. Wait, I'm clearing my office. Follow me to the - err, I wonder where would be good. Just follow me," the bespectacled teacher commands.

I recall that he's not a teacher but is actually the school's student counsellor. I don't remember his name, though, having only been here for two days. So following his orders, we walk down the Academic Block A, across the canteen, through an area containing a swimming pool. Then through water...

Wait, I'm drowning!

Thankfully, the teacher pulls me out right before I am about to sink to the bottom.

"That's the second time today, boy! Don't choose a school that is almost closed to kill yourself!"

"I'm not trying to kill myself! I just fell."

"How could you fall into the swimming pool anyway?"

I seriously have no idea. "Err... it wasn't supposed to be there?"

"The swimming pool has been there for the past four years!"

"Well, I've never been here before!"

"You should still be able to see it!"

"Then it must be elves."

"Elves?"

"Or aliens. You know they're all over the place nowadays. Just the other day I found some aliens slurping curry noodles at a food stall near my house."

"I don't understand a single word of what you're saying... Well, we can't have you walk around with those wet clothess. Come with me, let's see if there's something for you to wear in the swimming club's changing room."

He then proceeds to rummage through all the boxes stacked to the ceiling, finding cheerleader uniforms, school swimsuits, and a bunch of girly costumes. It seems like the uniforms of every clubs in the school was stuffed here when they decided to close the school. I would love to see these uniforms in action on the bodies it was supposed to be put on.

"I'm sorry, it seems like there's only female uniforms here."

No way, seriously? What am I going to wear?

"Just give me the most normal-looking one. Why is it all female clothes anyway?"

"Most boys here joined clubs without a dresscode, but most clubs formed by girls were obsessed with getting their own separate uniforms. So I guess that's how we're burdened with having to deal with so many uniforms. Even the chess club had its own uniform if I recall correctly."

"Why does it all end up here? Why didn't they take it home?"

"Since they bought the uniforms with money given by the school, it belongs to the club, which in turned belongs to the school. I wish they had just taken it home, though. What am I going to do with all this stuff?"

"Sell it?" I suggest, while my eyes catch on to something that looks like a string bikini.

"Who's going to buy it?"

Perverts, maybe?

"And I'm in charge of this too! So troublesome - hey, I found a new set of school uniform. You can wear - oh, I forgot you're a boy."

In his hand is an unopened pack of school uniform. A girl's school uniform. In his other hand is also an unopened pack of school uniform. Why are they keeping school uniforms here? Do they sell school uniforms?

"Nevermind, just give it to me. I'm shivering."

"Are you sure? It's a girl's uniform. As a teacher, I shouldn't even be considering this in the first place."

"It's fine, just give it. It's not like you're forcing me to wear it, right?"

"Alright. Here, I'll wait outside."

"Thank you. I'll come out once I'm ready," I tell him as I start taking off my soaking white shirt.

******

"Done!" I announce as I come out wearing the full set of female uniform, the skirt of which barely reaches my knees. It's like a normal government school's girl's uniform, a white shirt and pinafore. The only difference is that the pinafore is red instead of the government's baby-blue.

"What's... with the wig?"

"Found it inside one of the boxes labelled 'theatre club'."

"No, I'm not asking you where you found it. I'm asking you why you're wearing it."

"I'm not going to walk around school looking like a pervert."

"I must not judge. I must not judge. I must not judge."

"What religious mantra are you chanting?"

"Nevermind, let's keep walking. Be careful not to fall into the swimming pool, a ditch or a toilet bowl."

Is that supposed to be a joke? I take off my white school shoes and white socks just in case. My original shoes and socks were drenched when I fell into the swimming pool, so I'm wearing a sports shoe and a pair of white thigh-high sports socks I found inside a box labelled 'lacrosse club'. Would be bad if I ruin these too, so walking bare-footed, I keep close behind the school counsellor.

He ignores me as he tries to open one door after another, most of which are locked. In the end, we come to a room labelled 'Student Records'. He takes out a bunch of keys and unlocks the door, gesturing me to follow him inside. It was a room with a lot of steel filing cabinets, two desks and two chairs. There is nothing else here.

"This is the counselling room?"

"As I've said, my office is being cleared. This is the only place that is both free and private. So please take a chair and let's talk."

"Is it fine? Aren't you clearing out your office?"

"It's fine. I still have a week left before I have to turn in my keys. What is your name again?"

"Azrin bin Ahmad Dan."

"Right, don't suppose you know your student ID number yet?"

I shake my head.

"That's fine. You've just moved in anyway." He enters my name into the computer.

I make a nod while being a little excited about wearing girl's school uniform in public. No, I'm not awakening any fetish. I'm not getting hard, either. My heart is just beating a little roughly.

"Alright, Azrin bin Ahmad Dan. 16 years old. Former student of Blue Sphere Private Academy." He gets up, goes to a particular cabinet and takes out a folder with my name on it. He places it on the desk without opening it. Then he looks into the computer screen, before looking at my appearance. He shakes his head.

"This is weird," he mutters.

"What's weird?"

"How you're looking so comfortable in the girl's uniform. Have you done this before? No, I'm not judging, just wondering."

"I have only two principles in this world."

"Oh? Mind telling me?"

"Be the best even if life puts me at the bottom! And if I am unable to do anything about it, I will just go with the flow."

"This is you going with the flow?"

"Correct!"

"To be saying that so firmly... you're very confident, aren't you?"

"My confidence is higher than Mount Everest!"

The counsellor looks like he is restraining himself from making a frown, but then slowly forms a forced smile instead.

"So, Azrin, how about we have a little talk? How's school?

"What do you mean how's school? There's only three people in my whole class! And I'm one of them."

"Well, can't be helped. You entered the school shortly after the board of directors announced its closure. I wonder how your transfer even got approved."

"It was approved two months ago. I only stated that I would transfer after two months."

"Ah, I see. That wasn't mentioned here. I should probably add a comment - nah. Let's not bother."

"Is it okay to be so lazy?"

"What do you mean lazy? I'm about to be transferred. All because the principal was an idiot. Instead of reporting that he made bad decisions that made the school lose money, he kept it hidden and kept making even more bad decisions causing us to lose our reserve funds too!"

"Oh, so that's why the school is closing."

"Don't tell anyone you heard it from me. But let's talk about you."

"What do you want to know?"

"Did you make any friends in school?"

"You mean those scrawny geeks? I couldn't summon the mood to make small talks. I can imagine why they'd want to stay as long as possible in an empty school instead of going to a new school where they'll get bullied."

"Scrawny geeks, you say? According to the academic records from your old school, your grades were in the top five. Do you not identify yourself as a geek as well?"

"Hell no! No single word can identify me. I am all rounded, good at everything, bad at nothing!"

"Yet you almost drowned in the swimming pool."

"I was caught off-guard! Anyway, my point is, I do not identify myself as a geek because I don't spend all my time studying. I have a wide range of interest."

"I see. I'm sensing some resentment in this term 'geek'. Did something happen in the past that-"

"Hey! No psychoanalyzing me!"

"I'm a school counsellor. Psychoanalyzing students is my job."

"Well anyway, I'm not a geek."

"I see, so how do you identify yourself in five words or less?"

"Confident! Mature! Handsome! Smart! Motivated!"

"I... see.... You are indeed very confident." He enters some stuff into the computer. "If you are granted one wish, what would it be?"

"World domination!"

"Alright. What is your favourite colour?

"Red!"

"From one to nine, what's your favourite number?"

"Two!"

"May I ask why?"

"Being first grabs too much attention. I can be at the top without having to deal with the hassle of being first place."

"I see, antisocial, huh?"

"I'm NOT antisocial!"

"If a boy slipped on a banana peel, what would you do?"

"I'd laugh at him!"

"What if it's a girl?"

"I'd still laugh at her!"

"What would you consider as humanity's greatest strength?"

"The fact that humans just won't die."

"No such answer. Please choose between 'integrity', 'courage', 'honesty', 'loyalty', 'cooperation' and 'ingenuity'.

"Umm, ingenuity?"

"What is your choice of reading material? Literary literature, comics, fiction novels, science journals."

"Science fiction."

"Fiction novels then. If you were given a million dollars. What would be the first thing you would spend it on?

"Gold and Land."

"I guess 'house' would be closest."

"Hey, what are you doing?"

"An egg or a chicken. Which comes first?"

"Chicken."

"Is that a confident answer or just something along the line of 'I think so'?"

"Confident answer."

"'Definitely chicken' then. Alright. "You are an evil genius! You are smart, passionate to a fault and have good imagination. As an evil genius, people rely on you to make accurate assessments and decisions. You may not always be 'the leader' as your passion can sometimes get in the way, but we can say with absolute certainty that you're always 'the boss' of the group."

"Hey, did you just make me do an online personality quiz?

"Yes, I did. Now time to copy this and paste it into your psychiatric evaluation."

"Hey, don't half-ass my psychiatric evaluation you quack of a counsellor!"

"Get real. It's not like anyone can be motivated working in a school that's going to be closed in a week."

"I think you're the one who should be getting a psychiatric evaluation."

"Haa? You have something to say? Huh? Alright, fine. Lets talk about your home life then."

"I have a mother. My parents are divorced."

"Do you want to talk about the divorce?"

"No."

"Any siblings?"

"None, there's only the two of us."

"I see. How would you describe your home life?"

"Lonely!"

"Don't say it like it's the best thing in the world."

"Well, it's not like I can do anything about it. My mother's working away from home at the moment, so I spend every day alone. What is this for, though?"

"Hum? Every student is expected to have at least an entry on their pyschiatric evaluation section. You're going to need this when you enter District 24 High School."

"Ah... about that! Can I not go to District 24?"

"If you're worried about being accepted, there's no need to trouble yourself. They received specific orders from the Ministry of Education to accept any of our students that applies to join their school."

"No, it's not about being accepted. I just don't like the school. Is there any other school that I can go to?"

"What's wrong with it?"

"What ISN'T wrong with it? I've visited it once. It's crowded, stuffy, small and geeks get bullied there a lot!"

"I thought you don't consider yourself a geek?"

"That's beside the point! My point is it's a terrible excuse of a school!"

"I'm sure there are worse schools that District 24."

"Yeah, in Bangladesh! Instead of sending everyone to District 24, the ministry should've poured money into this school and keep it open instead."

"It was considered, but there are legal issues with keeping this particular school open."

"I want to go to another school! NOT District 24!"

"Some of our students did choose to transfer to two other schools. They're the only schools that will process the application within a few days. All other schools will take from a month to three months to process transfer applications. They've also loosened their protocols concerning students from our school."

"What school?"

"Bestari Setia."

"Alright, get me into that!" Bestari schools are considered the best schools in the country, offering the best curriculum, the best equipments and the best teachers.

"No can do. They're full."

Of course, being the most elite government-funded school means it's also the most sought after school.

"Then why are you even suggesting that?!"

"You asked for the name."

"What about the other one, then?"

"Well that... there is a problem. You don't have the right equipment. Though... you would probably be able to pull it off, looking like this."

"What? What do you mean?"

"The other school is St. Catherine High School. It's an all -girls school. Which means you have absolutely no chance of entering that school, even looking like this."

"All-girls school?"

"Yes, arguably the best in the whole region actually, even better than Bestari schools. With your grades alone, you will definitely be able to enter. It's even possible to get a scholarship if you ace their entrance exam. But all these are pointless arguments because you're a boy."

"Is there no other choice?"

"You can apply for other schools, but you will have to go to District 24 before you receive their reply. Since I'll be transferred to another school, you'll have to do this yourself. Oh, those idiots. I've told them to keep watch on the ink gauge! Well, try to think about it while I go get a refill for the printer." the counsellor says so as he leave the room.

Think about it, you say? But I've already thought about it. I'm definitely not going to District 24. Transferring to other schools will require my mother's signature, and she's not around to give me that. Even if I can get my mother's signature, I will still be required by law to go to school in the meantime, which means I'll still have to enter District 24. In the case of St. Catherine, I won't be able to enter since I'm not a girl. So what to do?

I pace back and forth in the room, as the skirt swishes around my legs. Then I see the reflection of myself on the window. I can't tell who it is at first, but then I realize that it's me. I look no different from a girl. With this, a thought enters my head and I act on it without a second thought.

I cross over to the other side of the desk. Without sitting, I look over the student information displayed on the computer and navigate to the Personal Information tab. The space where my profile picture should've been is empty, showing the words N/A. I quickly change my name from Azrin bin Ahmad Dan to Azrin binti Ahmad Dan and tick female under gender subheader. I change every gender-sensitive pronouns into female before pressing 'update'. Then I open the folder on the desk and take out the first page, the Personal Information, crumple it and stuff it into one of my shoes.

I have only taken a seat for four seconds before the counsellor enters. He sits on the chair on the other side of the desk and skillfully changes the printer's ink cartridge in just seconds. Then he turns back to the computer screen and the printer starts printing shortly after.

He sighs when he opens the folder. "Clerks! I know the school is almost closed, but at least do your job properly!"

Then he goes back to the screen, clicks, and instead of printing the Personal Information page, his eyes catch something on the screen. He instantly snorts at what he sees. He looks me up and down while the cornerss of his lips attempts to turn upwards on his face.

No way, am I busted?

But instead of outing me, with his lips trembling as if unsure whether to laugh, frown or act natural, he asks, "Would you like to take a picture for your school profile?"

"Huh?"

He takes out a smartphone and snaps a picture of me looking dumbfounded. Then he connects the smartphone to the computer and transfers the picture into my personal school profile. Meanwhile, I just sit quietly not understanding what just happened.

With a straight face, he says, "It's late, you should go home now. I'll be around tomorrow in case you want to talk about anything else. Heheheh."

With that said, he pushes me out of the record's room.

With my borrowed shoes and socks on, I walk back to class to pick up my school bag and return home. It's just as I walk past the threshold of the school gate that I realize I'm walking in my new female uniform. Feeling panic, I run back to the swimming club's clubroom and turn the knob. It is locked.

Noooo!!!

After repeated attempts to pick the lock or find another way to get in, I give up. I'll just have to pick up my male uniforms tomorrow, when the teachers unlock the clubroom. Or if it is still locked, I'll have to find that counsellor and ask him to unlock it for me.

Which means walking home in this female uniform. It's fine. I'll be fine. This is training. I'm going to enter St. Catherine. I need the training.

******

Next Monday, almost a week later, I stand before the massive gates of St. Catherine Girl's School. Wearing my Mahmud Baginda High School girl's uniform, I steel my heart and walk into the school that I will be attending for the next two years.

"You over there!"

Crap! Have I been found out? I've only been here for five steps.

I slowly turn my face towards the voice. It is a ponytailed girl, holding a paper fan in her right hand and wearing an armlet with the letters DC written on it on her upper left arm. DC should stand for discipline council, so maybe she's a prefect?

"Why didn't you register yourself with the guard post?"

"Eh? I still have to register with the guard post? Sorry it's my first day here, I don't know the rules."

I had received the School Rules booklet along with the acceptance letter. If you're expecting me to read all twenty pages of it, though, you don't know me all that well. I hate rules. My personal motto is "Break The Rules, And Get Away With It".

"Your first day? Are you a transfer student?"

"Yes, my name is Azrin Ahmad Dan. This is my first day here. Do I still have to register with the guard post?"

"You should have received a name tag alongside the acceptance letter."

Oh, I did receive it. I forgot all about it, should be in my bag somewhere... "Here!"

"Wear it everywhere until you receive your new uniform and identification wallet."

"Okay," I say as I clip the name tag between the slight swells on the chest part of my school uniform. In case you're wondering, these are silicone falsies a certain neighbour let me borrow. I haven't changed gender yet. Wait, what am I saying? I will NEVER change my gender!

"May I ask, where should I go for now?"

"Meet up with your homeroom teacher. Who is it?"

"Miss Arreana."

She pointed at the closest building. "First floor, Door Number 4. If she's not there, ask the other teachers where she may be."

"Thanks a lot for your help."

"Big sister Sofia."

"Pardon?"

"I'm your senior. So you must call me big sister. And my name is Sofia."

If you're my senior, then you're only a year older, aren't you? I doubt you're a Form 6. Those people's existence are separate from Form 4 (like me) and Form 5 (like her) students. Besides, calling someone unrelated to me as 'big sister' is kind of disgusting. Still, making enemies on my first day of school will be bad for the rest of my days at school. So let's just admit defeat this once.

"Thanks, big sister-"

"Arissa! I've told you many times don't shorten your skirt!"

"Eeek! It's Demon Sofia!" The girl called Arissa squealed before shooting off in the general direction of the academic buildings followed closely by Sofia brandishing her paper fan.

******

"Class, we have a new student today. She's from the now-closed Mahmud Baginda High School. Please introduce yourself, Azrin. Make it short."

I look at all 16 female students in the class, take a deep breath and start my introduction.

"Hi everyone, I'm Azrin Ahmad Dan. Please just call me Rin. I live in Subang Jaya. Pleased to meet you," I introduce myself with a cheerful female voice. Well, I don't actually do anything much with my voice, really. A certain neighbour told me that it was fine, and that it wasn't masculine in the first place.

I stand in front, expecting some questions, but, strangely, everyone is quiet. Serene, even.

No way! Did they found out from my mannerism? Or was my voice masculine after all? Could it be that a certain neighbour pranked me? If that's true, I will beat her up repeatedly with a soda bottle when I go back. Assuming of course, I'm not going to be sent to the police in the first place.

"There's an empty seat next to Lilia. You can sit there, Azrin."

"Yes, teacher," I speak with a small voice, fearing that I am going to be revealed as a boy at any time.

Homeroom continues for ten more minutes before Miss Arreana concludes it by telling me to meet her after class for my school entry exam and to pick up my new school uniform. The whole time, I'm sitting on pins and needles wondering when I will suffer punishment for crossdressing in a girl's school. When the teacher leaves the class though, the class suddenly erupts in cheers and the class mood improves immediately. Most of them even come and introduce themselves to me.

From them, I learn that Miss Arreana is extremely strict and expects absolutely noble composure from her students. Anyone who shows any act that is considered unbecoming of young ladies will get the paddle. Yes, they still allow the use of a paddle in this school! So that is the reason for all the serene faces in the class.

Phew, so I didn't actually screw up. Certain neighbour, you're safe from retaliation for now.

"Get back to your seats. Miss Maya's class is about to start," a girl with blondish hair and slightly caucasian face speaks to the girls surrounding me. She is the one who sits at the table in front of me.

By the way, my seat is in the last row.

"You're such a spoilsport Aerfean," a girl by the name of Nadia pouts.

"Aerfean? Are you a foreigner?" I ask.

"My father is Welsh, my mother is Malay. Now put away your stuff. Next lesson is math. Miss Maya Rosacea is the teacher."

And so I spend the first day at an all-girl's school as a girl. Not that it's anything new. I spent three days at Mahmud Baginda as a girl as well. So it's not big deal. I can handle it. I'm not paranoid.

My two remaining teachers at Mahmud Baginda gave me strange glances at first, but never asked questions. My remaining classmates meanwhile, couldn't care less. They probably didn't even notice that their male classmate had turned into female classmate.

At the end of the school day, I visit my homeroom teacher for the entrance exam and receive my new school uniform. They're three sets consisting of white shirt, plaid skirt and blazers. I've never been so excited about getting girl's clothes. No, I'm still not awakening any secret desires. Please don't lump me in with all the perverts who did this for sexual gratification. This is work. Work!

Later at night, I show my new school uniform to a certain neighbour, who proceeds to give me a full hair extension therapy and facial care for a discount while saying things like "Kyaaa! That's so nice!", "You're too cute, Rin-chan!" and "Leave it to big sister, I'll make you the cutest trap in the world!"

Her enthusiasm kinda terrifies me. So I only go so far as to allow her to style my hair following her preference. I draw the line when she offers to attach a bigger pair of silicone breasts to my chest.

You're wondering what my uniform looks like? Well, it's a maroon blazer over a white shirt. There's also a similar checkered maroon coloured plaid skirt that goes along with it. A certain neighbour made me wear a ribbon too on top of everything. I obliged her, as I knew I would still need her help in the future.

******

It is a nice, sunny day. I wake up early, bathe myself with a sweet-smelling bath foam, walk to the Subang Jaya Komuter Station, then switch trains at KL Sentral. I walk out of the Bandar Tasik Selatan Komuter Station and then walk for about ten minutes to reach my new school, the St. Catherine Girl's School. Considering the location and the distance, this school should've been my last choice, even my old school, Blue Sphere is closer, but this is the only place that will accept me within just a week. If I'm allowed to drive though, this is actually pretty close to my home, only 20 minutes away. Since I take the Komuter railway network, it takes me like an hour to reach school instead.

Besides, the reason I had to leave Blue Sphere when my parents divorced in the first place was because it was expensive. Mom couldn't afford even the tuition fees, let alone all the extras such as school trips, club fees and other stuff. I suppose we could've asked dad to continue to pay for it, but it seemed like mom was against that.

When I received the acceptance letter for St. Catherine, I felt a little blessed for having a feminine face. It gave me a bit more option in this case. Although my National ID still identifies me as male, apparently, the school couldn't be bothered cross-checking my photoshopped National ID with the citizen database. Come to think of it, I'm not even sure if schools have access to citizen database in the first place.

Right now, though, I'm feeling a little cursed for having a feminine face.

"Open wide, Rin. Aaaah..."

"Rin, let's go to the canteen together."

"You girls, back off! She's going to have lunch with me."

Yes, it seems like right now, I'm being fought over by three girls. By order of appearance, they are the girly Zara, the bossy Shahira and the sporty Loretta. Normally, I would consider this as heartwarming female bonding, unfortunately, my gut feeling is saying that this isn't normal.

You see...

Zara is sitting next to me, our chairs pressed next to each other while she's feeding me small pieces of boneless chicken using a chopstick. Shahira is pulling my hand insistently. Loretta is hugging my neck tightly, mashing her small boobs against the back of my head while pulling my head on the opposite direction as Shahira.

How come I was never this popular as a boy?

"Knock it off!" I hear a voice scolding them as each of the girls are smacked on the head with a rolled up chemistry textbook.

"Hurts!" Loretta said.

"Aiya!" Zara said cutely.

"Ow!" Shahira cried.

"Don't scare off the new girl, you weirdos," Aerfean says as she hit the palm of her hand with the rolled up textbook.

"But Aerfean... how can I resist this beauty in twintails? She looks so cuuuute!" Loretta says as she rubs her chin on the top of my head.

Thankfully a certain neighbour used hair extension on me yesterday. Had this been a wig, it would've fallen off by now. That would be very bad.

Aerfean smacks Loretta on the head with the rolled up textbook again. "Let go of her right now."

Aerfean is showing some really dark aura right now. Or it's probably just my hallucination from the lack of air. Loretta is hugging my neck too tightly!

Faced with Aerfean's glare and the threat of being hit with the chemistry textbook again, like Loretta, Shahira also raises her hand in surrender and takes a step back. Only Zara is unable to sense the mood and continues to shove pieces of boneless chicken into my mouth, while telling me how cute I look eating the lunch she prepared. She even asks me if I'd like her to prepare lunch for me tomorrow.

Ahh, why couldn't I be this popular as a boy?

Soon afterward, the bell rings and the students slowly trickles back into the class, Zara comes close and whispers into my ears, "I’ll cook for you again tomorrow, okay?"

Mom, dad, is this going to be the spring of my life? Girls cook lunch for their boyfriends, right? Does this mean this cute and sweet girl is my girlfriend? Does this mean I’m not longer single? Is it too much for a boy to hope for?

Except I don’t look like a boy right now. Wait, hold on a minute, doesn’t this make us a lesbian couple? What the heck?!!!

******

Ding dong!

Comes the sound of the doorbell.

"Who could it be?" I ask while holding my lacquered nails up in the air.

"You're not expecting guests?" a certain neighbour asks.

"No. Who would visit anyway? Mom's not here and apart from the neighbours we exchanged doorgifts with when we moved in, we don't know anyone else."

"Maybe your new classmates?"

"Oh lord, please don't say that, even as a joke! If they actually went out of their way to find out my home, and believe me some of them would likely do it, I will have to wear girl's clothes at all times. Home is the only place I can become a man. Heck, just recalling those girls are making me paranoid of being watched."

"Don't look much like a man when you have these B cups attached permanently on your chest." She pokes my silicone falsies as if to make a point.

"Wait! This is permanent?!!!"

Ding dong!

"Hahaha, I'll let you figure that out." That certain neighbour goes to the door and after checking at the peekhole, opens it slightly.

On the other side of the door are two men wearing AXXA deliverymen uniform, one of them hands her a clipboard to which she signs. Then she opens the door fully, allowing the two men to carry their cargoes inside. Both of them greets me when they see me sitting on the sofa with my fingers raised and my feet resting on the coffee table while I'm waiting for the polish to dry.

"Put it here. Here." She points at an empty spot in the living room. Originally, it was supposed to be a spot for mom's chinaware cabinet, but when my parents divorced, dad wanted the cabinet and its whole contents instead, so that spot has remained empty all this time.

After depositing five cardboard boxes in the living room, the deliverymen leaves followed by that certain neighbour. She thanks them, drops a note of ten into the hand of one of them and closes the door behind them. Then she returns, hugs me from behind and says, "Rin-chaaan, it's a total success ~ They totally think you're a girl."

I groan. "What else would they think when there's someone with a pair of B cup breasts sitting on the sofa while waiting for that someone’s nail polish to dry?"

"I wonder what's inside the boxes." She goes into the kitchen and comes back with a knife.

"Mom won't like it if you open her stuff."

"But it's addressed to you, Rin-chan."

To me? Could it be my Xbox set? Or the whole collection of comics that mom hid from before my PT3 exams? Did dad send them to me from our old home? Could it be all of the above?

"Eh? Are these your old clothes, Rin-chan?"

"Clothes?"

"Oh, there's girl scouts uniform, I was in girl scouts too! Oh look! School swimsuits! My old school didn't have a swimming pool, so I never had a school swimsuit. And look, isn't this the infamous Mahmud Baginda Volleyball Club uniform that was famous for riding up the butt crack whenever the players make an overhead swipe?"

Girl scouts? School swimsuits? Volleyball club? Mahmud Baginda? Hold on, I have a bad feeling about this.

"Oh look, there's a letter addressed to you."

"Give me!"

Dear Azrin,

After deliberating about what to do with the clothes in the swimming club's clubroom, I've decided not to sell it. With the school closing and the school accounts closed, there is no place for the money to go to. Taking the money for myself would be unethical. Therefore, I've decided to donate it to various schools in the area.

But before that, based on the interest you've shown for the past week, I thought you would want some of it for your own use. So I've picked out some of the clothes that I thought would fit you. All the best in St. Catherine.

You shitty counsellor! I don't have this kind of interest!!!How does he even know I enrolled in St. Catherine in the first place?

"Oh, there's another letter, Rin-chan~"

I press my palms to my face. "I don't want to look at another letter again."

"Oh, it's your end-school certificate from Mahmud Baginda. Oh my, you're female in Mahmud Baginda? A 'binti' too! And this picture is so cuuute! Can I keep this? Pleeeeease?"

I groan inside.

Plick!

My smartphone makes a sound while I groan at a certain neighbour’s enthusiasm. Reaching for my smartphone, I unlock it and see a new message from an unknown number.

Won't you wear the swimsuit?

Huh? Who the heck is this?

******

"Caught you!" Shahira calls from behind me, her hands already under my armpits as she tries to do something inappropriate between girls.

Before she can go any further, Zara comes along and shoulders Shahira as hard as her small body is able to. Despite her smaller size, Zara manages to shoulder the unsuspecting Shahira away towards the individual lockers. Shahira’s face hit the door of the locker with a bang and stands unmoving in stunned confusion.

“Good morning, Rin!” Zara greets with a sunny smile as if what happened just now was just my imagination.

“Good morning, Zara!” I turn around and give her a reply, while attempting to forget what just happened.

“Good morning, Rin! You look cute today- oof!” Shahira who finally recovers from her stunned confusion attempts to hug me from the front.

That’s before the smaller Zara pushes Shahira's left cheek against that same locker door, effectively pinning Shahira’s face against the locker. In Shahira’s confusion, she is unable to make any move of resistance. Even I am feeling confused and stands stunned in the locker room. That sweet, cute and small Zara is currently pressing Shahira’s face against the locker without losing her smile. It’s almost surreal.

“Rin, quickly change to your sports uniform, okay? Don’t worry, I’ll keep all the bugs away,” Zara maintains her smile as she watches me with a delightfully innocent smile.

I change my clothes uncomfortably. I can almost hear Shahira and Zara licking their lips as I take off my school shirt. The piercing stares of the two wolves, one with her face still pressed against the locker while the other still making a bright smile which doesn’t reach her eyes, when I start taking off my skirt makes me wish I had worn the sports uniform from home.

“Yo Rin!” Loretta appears out of nowhere spanking my butt, “You’re too thin! You should eat more.”

Zara’s resulting glare feels like it should’ve burned Loretta to cinders where she stands.

Today, we're playing handball. I've never played one before, so the rules are a little hard to follow for me. I've played basketball before, but it was quite different. As a boy in Blue Sphere Academy, though, I used to play football, which was previously the national sport. That was until 2015, though. After suffering continuous defeat in 2015 culminating in a horrifyingly embarrassing 10-0 defeat against Saudi Arabia, football carried such terrible stigma that everyone switched to futsal, basketball, badminton and squash.

Please forgive me for this background info, but this is just to make you understand my position. You see, in co-ed schools, handballs, although available, is not played all that much. In boys school, it's not played at all, because it has the reputation of being a 'girly' sport.

Because this is a girl's school, they seem to play handballs every two weeks here, so everyone's an expert, except me. And these experts play a very hardcore game. It is a level of violence I have never seen before. Thus how, during my moment of confusion, the ball flies straight to my face and I am too slow to protect myself.

But Zara is faster. She pushes me away from the path of the ball, potentially saving me from a head injury and possibility of amnesia. I fall to the ground, wincing as my elbow grazes against the pebble on the ground. Sitting up, I look at my bleeding elbow and gently brush away the sand sticking to the area around the wound.

“Oh no, you’re bleeding!” Zara kneels next to me. Inspecting the wound, she declares, “Oh no, this is serious! We need to go to the infirmary immediately!”

“No, it’s just a scratch, there’s no need to-” I try to refuse before she cut me off.

“No, this is serious. What if it becomes infected? How can I live with myself if your beautiful skin becomes scarred?” Zara says as she drags me to the infirmary by my uninjured hand.

“Really, I’m fine, Zara. It’s just a scratch.” I tell Zara while she opens the cabinets containing medicines and bandages.

I can’t help but be amazed by how everything is unlocked and in the open. Back in my old school, they kept everything, even the panadols in locked cabinets to prevent theft. In my old school, even the infirmary was locked when the health teacher wasn’t around. In this school, it appears all the students can come and go as they wish.

“Hold still,” Zara says as she washes my wound and then applies an antiseptic ointment. Then she places medicated cotton on the wound and wraps a bandage around my elbow.

Seeing her loving and gentle actions of tending to my wound, it is easy to forget that it’s just A SCRATCH. She makes it seem like I’m on the verge of death. Or is this how girls are like? I’m gonna have to ask a certain neighbour later.

“There, all good. Now you just rest here until the end of physical education like a good girl.” She smiles while tucking me in.

Then she gets under the cover as well.

“Umm, what are you doing?” I ask while she snuggles closer against my bandaged right elbow.

“I’m taking care of you.”

“Do you have to be in the bed too?”

“I don’t want you to feel cold.”

“It’s summer.”

“The nurse likes to turn the air conditioner to very low temperature.”

“It’s not even on!”

Zara becomes quiet at my rebuke.

“Am I... disturbing you, Rin?” Zara looks at me with upturned eyes. Her eyes look moist, as if she’s on the verge of crying. She looks so small, so weak and so vulnerable that my protective instinct surges out like a waterfall.

“... No, you’re not,” I wrap my uninjured left hand around her waist, enjoying the softness of her body while pushing up her face with my other hand by her chin, which isn’t really that injured in the first place. “It’s just that I’m not sure what you’re trying to do. It’s making me confused, Zara.”

“Oh, I’m sorry. It’s just this is the first time I feel like this and I’m not sure myself. But I think... I think... I’m in love with you.” Zara tries to hide her reddening face in her palms.

I feel my own face getting hot hearing her confession. My confusion level increases by a factor of ten now. On one hand, I’m dancing in the garden of blooming flowers because I finally get my first ever love confession, and the girl’s plenty cute too. I feel like shouting to the world, “I have a girlfriend!” On the other hand, I feel down because she falls in love with a fake persona, someone who isn’t real and will disappear within two years. How can I be so selfish to allow this to happen?

“I’m sorry, Zara, but I can’t accept your heart.” There, I’ve said it. Mom, your son is alone again. Sobs.

“Why not? Do you hate me?”

“No! You know it’s not that.”

“Then, do you have a boy you like?”

No way! I’m not gay! “The mere thought disgusts me,” I mutter under my breath.

“Oh, then do you only like girls?”

Ah shucks, now she thinks I’m a lesbian.

“No, it’s just that there are a lot of things going on in my life right now. I can’t really think about hooking up for now.”

“I promise, I won’t get in your way. I can even come to your home to cook dinner for you if you like. I won’t cause you any trouble. I just want to be close to you,” Zara looks at me with wet eyes as she places her right hand on my fake left breast gently while muttering something inaudible.

I pull her right hand away for fear of her finding out it’s fake.

“I guess maybe it doesn’t hurt to try, but are you sure you want to be with me? I mean, I’m a girl.” Well, not quite.

“Is that a ‘yes’?”

“Mm.”

Suddenly Zara jumps on me and plants a chaste kiss on my lips. Her face turns all red after the deed and she acts all shy, either because it was her first kiss or because she kissed a girl. Don’t misunderstand, it’s cute, it’s adorable. The only think I ask is for her to get her knee off my injured elbow right now!

******

“Open wide, Rin. Ahhh...”

“Ahhh...” I open my mouth wide as Zara feeds me a rice ball the size of my thumb. As I chew the small ball of rice, my thoughts wonder as to how anyone can get full from something like this. Then Zara asks for me to feed her too, and I do it obediently.

“Rin, let’s go to the canteen!” Shahira pulls me by my left arm.

“Rin’s going to have lunch with me!” Loretta hugs my neck while mashing her smallish breasts against the back of my head.

“Hey, Rin’s mine!” Zara complains as she tries to remove their hands from my body.

“Quiet!” Aerfean stands up from her seat and elegantly walks towards us before continuing with, "Is it so hard to eat your lunch in peace?"

One step, two step, every step emphasizes her delicious figure. Every click and clack of her school shoes echoes in the class, creating a seductive and alluring atmosphere. Her long legs under the skirt and knee-high white stockings draws my eyes to it, making me unable to tear my eyes away. In the haze of my mind, I feel like I want to be stepped on by those legs while calling her 'big sister'.

Aerfean drops a thick Chemistry textbook on my desk loudly. Glaring at me, she says, “Pick it up, roll it up and use it to smack their heads. You need to learn to stand up for yourself.”

“Eh? Isn’t that kind of violent?” I reply without picking up the texbook.

She glares lasers at me. As I look into her cold eyes, I feel like something is awakening inside me. Calm down, calm down. I slap my cheeks to wake me up from my delusions.

In the meantime, all three of them takes a little distance from Aerfean.

“Are you saying you won’t do what I told you to do?”

“But, hitting girls is-”

“Rin, just do as Aerfean said! We-we were wrong. P-please hit me!” Zara says, offering herself as a sacrifice.

I look at Zara’s defeated face, resigned to the fate of being whacked by her own boyfriend. No, she sees me as her girlfriend. Sigh, this is messed up. Not wanting to cause any trouble, I roll up the chemistry textbook on the table and following Aerfean's recommendation, hold it up to whack the heads of the three stooges.

Ah wait. Since I'm a guy it won't be good if I use my whole male strength, right? So I'll have to weaken the strength a little. With that thought, I whack Zara's head with the rolled up textboook.

“Pon”, the rolled up texbook hit her head.

Umm, maybe I should've hit harder? But she's a girl. It's not a gentlemanly thing to do, right? Well, at least it works. They're suddenly quiet now and looking at me with blank faces instead of those usual loud noises.

"Kyaaaa! You're making my heart go kyun kyun kyun!" Zara screams loudly with a red face while excitedly swinging her chopstick-wielding right hand.

"What was that? What was that? You're so cute, Rin!" Shahira hugs my face against her B cup boobs.

"Oh sweet Mary! Rin, you're going to give me diabetes!" Loretta cries while hugging my neck tightly from behind as her smaller pair of boobs rub against my back.

Just great. Instead of creating a firm and strict persona, I'm showing myself as a sweetly cute girl instead. Teacher Aerfean, please tell me what I did wrong!

******

“Please excuse my intrusion,” Zara with her hair in long twintails that resemble my own signature style says to the empty house as she passes through the front door of my apartment. Her short plaid skirt swishes against her knee-length stockings with every move. Her form-fitting pink blouse creates a tight silhouette that gives her underdeveloped body an allure that invokes a protective instinct within me.

Protective or not though, I find myself unable to look away. In comparison, I’m only wearing a loose t-shirt and shorts. Should I have worn something more stylish for my girlfriend’s first house visit? Hehe, girlfriend. I like how that sounds. Mom, your son finally has a girlfriend. Too bad she’s gay, but hey, a girlfriend’s a girlfriend. After secretly dating for two weeks, she finally asks if she can come to my home.

“Sorry, I’m the only one at home. Will it be a problem for you?” I say while taking the plastic bags containing groceries from her hand and putting it in the kitchen.

“I already know – I mean, I don’t mind at all. No, not at all. After all, we get to be alone, just me and you,” Zara says as she shyly runs her forefinger downward along my chest.

“Umm, did... your parents say anything?” I ask while feeling the tingle of having her fingers running down my ribcage.

“They only tell me to have fun and to come home before ten.”

“I bet you didn’t tell them you’re going to your boy – I mean, girlfriend’s home, did you?”

“They don’t need to know everything. Does that make me a bad girl?” she asks in a cute, almost innocent voice.

It almost breaks all the barrier in my mind. “Umm, well. It’s fine, I guess. I imagine they won’t understand our relationship.”

“I’m glad you agree, Rin. Shall I start cooking now?” She grabs an apron and goes into the kitchen.

“Ah, I’ll help you.”

The dinner is absolutely great. Sorry mom, but I think she’s a much better cook than you. She knows exactly what dishes I like and how I like it cooked. She even knows how I like my dessert, vanilla ice cream with chocolate topping and strawberries. It’s like she knows everything that I like, even things that I have no idea I like. She’s like the perfect girlfriend. I really want her as my girlfriend for real.

After dinner, we cuddle together on the couch while watching a movie on Astro. It’s a romance movie, but heck do I know the title. After about 30 minutes of watching the movie, it’s the movie’s to watch us. By now we’re busy necking and kissing each other. I have to keep her hands away from my crotch which gets harder and harder to hide with every kiss.

******

Today is Saturday of the third week of us secretly dating each other. Zara is almost a daily fixture in my apartment nowadays. It’s a good thing that mom is not around and a certain neighbour is away on a vacation in Semporna. I’ll never be able to hide this if they’re around.

Today, Zara volunteers to do housekeeping which I’m truly grateful for. Being a single child, I’m no stranger to household chores. However, house cleaning is one thing that is a complete mystery to me. Mom used to scold me for doing it half-heartedly, but seriously mom, it’s not that I didn’t want to do it. Okay, I don’t want to do it, but the real reason is that I just don’t get how it’s done.

I love watching Zara dust the cupboards, electrical appliances and sweep or mop the floor. Even her vacuuming the carpet is a delight to watch. Every time she catches me watching, she’ll blush and look away. So cute!

Although I say she mop the floor, she doesn’t actually use the mop. She gets on her knees on the floor and wipe it clean with a cloth. She wipes the floor with a cloth on all fours. On all fours! With her butt pointing at me! How can my manly blood not boil from seeing such a sight? I am no eunuch, I have a very healthy male urges.

I hear tearing sounds from my room.

There shouldn’t be any tearing done in my room. Zara is only there to change the bedsheet – oh my god!

I jump over the couch, my knee knocks against a table, but I don’t care about the pain. Running into my room, I encounter the sight that will be in my nightmares forever. For in my room, sitting on the floor is Zara. She is sitting on the floor with a stack of magazines on her left and a trashcan in her right. She is tearing my porn magazines with a smile. She is tearing them one by one, WITH A SMILE!

“Stop!!!” I jump forward and fall face down onto the small pile of leftover porn magazines.

“Hm? What’s wrong, love?” Zara asks innocently while pulling another porn magazine from under my body.

“Stop tearing my porn!” I yelled with tears in my eyes.

“Oh, you won’t need them anymore. You have me now.”

Wha-what are you saying?

“I’m the only fapping material you'll ever need. If you want me to do anything, just say it and I’ll do my best, okay? Now please get up from that pile of filth or I’ll get angry, my love,” Zara tells me this while smiling, but this time, her smiling face feels like the face of a demon instead of an angel.

“Please, I need them!” I plead to my merciless girlfriend as she continues to pull magazines from under my body.

“Don’t you worry, my love. I’ve already put lots of my own pictures in your computer. Anytime you need relief and I’m not here, you can look at those, okay? Oh by the way, I’ve deleted all the trash and filth from your computer.”

No!!!! I jump up from the stack of magazines and open my porn folders one by one. There was nothing left. Not even my browser bookmarks remain. My five-year porn collection, they’re all goooooone!

I fall to my knees in front of my computer desk. Tears flow down my face as the horror sinks in. I no longer have my porn collection. My babies, my beloveds. Goodbye, Akari Hoshino. Goodbye, Amami Tsubasa. Goodbye, Azumi Mizushima. Goodbye, Kaede Matsushima. I will never forget all of you. The time we spent together, I will treasure it for my whole life.

“What are you doing sitting there in a daze, Rin? I’ve already prepared a bath. Why don’t you go ahead and wash yourself before dinner?” Zara smiles while taking out the plastic bags containing the shreds of my porn magazines.

I must have been out for a long time. When I finally recover, Zara has already finished ripping my babies to small, useless pieces. I should be crying, recalling the horror, but my tears have gone dry. All that’s left now is regret and picking up the pieces of my life.

I walk into the bathroom, take off my clothes and enter the bathtub with my mind far away, looking at my past that is now just a memory. Not even the perfumed water of the bathtub is able to bring me back to this reality. Thus when I’m done with bathing, I stand up to get out of the bathtub and right at this moment, Zara comes in with a worried face.

Then she looks down, at my crotch.

My crotch, without the protection of panties.

“Why do you have a boy’s penis?” she asks with a confused face.

I immediately cover my crotch with my towel. “Wait, I can explain.”

“Are you a boy, but with breasts?”

“No, it’s complicated. It’s not what you think.”

“Well, this makes things easier.”

“I’m not trying to deceive – huh?”

“It’s functional, correct?”

“Yes...”

“Since you’re a boy, this works for the better.”

“I don’t follow.”

“Hm? It means we can legally get married, even with you looking like a girl. Ahh, I can’t believe I get to enjoy the best of both worlds. Of course, we’ll need to meet my parents and I’d like to meet yours so that I can ask their approval in marrying their daughter.”

“Wait, meet your parents? Meet my parents? This is too fast!”

“Oh, you’re right, we can meet my parents tomorrow. How about we just make babies tonight?”

No, no, no. I’m too young to get pregnant!

Hold on, I think there’s something wrong with this thought process.

"Wait! But I'm a boy!"

"So?"

"Aren't you taking this a little too calmly? Shouldn't you be angry that I lied to you or something?"

"Haa? What are you saying, Rin? Look, it doesn't matter if Rin is a girl or a boy. Rin is Rin and Rin is mine. Both the girl Rin and the boy Rin are mine, and I'm Rin's. It's simple, isn't it?

"Well, if you put it that way..."

“So Rin, how many children do you want? I think two boys and two girls would be perfect, won’t you agree? Or do you prefer more boys? I’d like to have at least a girl in the house.”

This is getting out of hand! Somebody please...

“SAVE MEEEEE!”

<-.-> <-.->

*This is the second route for Traps Are Delicious. The other routes would be Loretta's, Aerfean's and Aerfean's big brother. None of which have been written yet Ahahaha.
**As always, your feedbacks are very much appreciated. Thank you for reading. Please say something, or I'll cry.
***The first part is the same with the other route, the second part is different. Loretta's, Aerfean's and Aerfean's big brother's second part will be even more different.
****I should probably spread it into Traps Are Delicious, then provide links to the various routes, but I'm thoroughly lazy and unmotivated. I'm sorry, dear readers, but Ai-chan has very low blood pressure. <-.->